June 15, 2025 • 27 mins
The journey beyond the scale reveals profound truths about weight loss, psychology, and finding joy amidst life's most challenging moments.
When we think about cravings, most of us focus on willpower and restriction. But what if that approach actually strengthens our desire for forbidden foods? Drawing from behavioral psychology, I explore how our subconscious mind processes negation (spoiler: it doesn't), and why telling yourself "don't think about donuts" virtually guarantees you'll think about donuts. The solution? Freedom. Like a country dog with acres to roam who's perfectly content resting on the porch, giving ourselves permission to eat anything (within caloric limits) paradoxically reduces our psychological need to rebel against restrictions.
But cravings aren't just psychological—they're often your body's way of communicating specific nutritional needs. Chocolate cravings may signal magnesium deficiency, while salt cravings point to electrolyte imbalances. By understanding these signals, we can respond more intelligently to what our bodies actually need rather than mindlessly indulging.
The most powerful revelation came through profound personal loss. After losing two beloved dogs and a dear friend within a devastatingly short timeframe, I confronted mortality in ways that transformed my approach to health and weight loss. I realized that between today and my final day—whenever that might be—the only thing I truly control is how I feel. This clarity shifted everything: weight loss isn't the goal; it's merely a byproduct of creating a lifestyle that supports health, mobility, and joy.
Ready to transform your relationship with food and build sustainable systems that naturally lead to weight loss? Join me on this journey as I navigate the remaining 60 pounds of my weight loss goal, prepare for maintenance mode, and pursue activities like paddleboarding, scuba diving, and completing a triathlon—all while choosing joy every step of the way.
Discover daily tips and updates on the Hacking Fat Man journey. Follow on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube for transformation deep dives and more insights.
Link to download the Hacking The Fat Man Diet, Schedule and Supplements
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hi, welcome to the third episode of Hacking the Fat
man.
First of all, happy Father'sDay to everyone out there.
Brief update, quick updatestill hovering at 230.
My weight's bouncing a couplepounds here and there, but
according to my scale, I'vegained 6% muscle and I've
dropped 6% fat over the lastthree weeks.
So it's just my bodyreconfiguring itself Right now.
(00:20):
It's not uncommon, it happensquite often, and so I just
continue to do what I do.
I know it's going to work.
I know at some point I willhave another big drop when my
body is ready to do it Again.
This isn't about necessarilythe weight loss right, that's an
end goal of it but it's aboutestablishing a lifestyle, a
(00:41):
process that I can wake up everyday that will enable me to live
that life, and we're going toget into that today on the
podcast, before I get started ornot before I get started,
because I've already started Atthe end of last week's episode I
read a question from my buddy,tom, asking me about cravings
and how I handle cravings.
(01:01):
And to answer that questionthere are cravings and there are
cravings.
And there are cravings andthere are cravings and how I
handle cravings.
And to answer that questionthere are cravings and there are
cravings and there are cravingsand there are cravings, meaning
there are a bunch of differenttypes of cravings.
There are a bunch of reasonswhy we have cravings.
So I want to address the firstone, because this actually kind
of stumped me a little bit,because I don't necessarily have
cravings.
(01:21):
I get that oh pizza sounds goodtonight, or lasagna or get
those, but I don't necessarilyhave cream.
I get the oh pizza sounds goodtonight, or lasagna or get those
, but I don't get.
You know where?
I wake up in the morning andI'm craving something and until
I eat it, I you know I'm justgoing to be miserable.
I don't get those much anymore,and a lot of it comes from the
fact that I'm not limitingmyself in my diet.
Right, I literally can eatanything.
(01:43):
That's what I'm trying to telleveryone is you don't have to
limit and restrict your diet.
Now, you should in certaincases, but that's because you
want to do it, not becauseyou're forced to do it.
And that reminds me of a story.
I believe this came out ofSunday school, but it was the
story of a city dog versus acountry dog, and it's about
(02:05):
learning that if you giveyourself restraints or
restrictions that itautomatically, subconsciously,
creates this need to go againstthose restrictions.
So if you think of a city dog,right, city dog lives in an
apartment or lives in a smallbackyard and the second that
door's open they're gone.
Right, they want to go exploreand see things because all
(02:26):
they've known is this littlearea.
But a country dog, if you thinka country dog that's got no
fences can go, have all theseacres that it can go roam around
, where do you find a countrydog?
Well, you find that country dog, usually sleeping on the porch,
because it can go do anythingit wants.
It's fine and content where itis.
And that's true for us, right,you give yourself limits and
(02:47):
sometimes you're going to wantto rebel against those limits,
literally.
This morning I had to not forcemyself but I wasn't in the mood
taking my supplements because Ihave to do it every single day
and I'm like you know what, I'mgetting a little tired of it.
I still ended up taking mysupplements because, ultimately,
I know how they make me feel,but sometimes it gets a little
tough.
So, by not giving ourselveslimits, by giving us ourselves
(03:08):
the freedom to go and eatwhatever we want If I want a
donut today, I'll have a donut.
I just need to account for thecalories.
If you want ice cream, you canhave ice cream.
You just need to account forthe calories.
Now, and if I also know that ifI continue to eat those things,
or only those things, I'm goingto feel horrible.
So, anyway, give yourself theability to eat anything, don't
limit yourself, and you'll findthat some of the cravings go
(03:29):
away.
The other thing about cravingsis also how you're processing
those in your head.
Let me give you an example ofthis.
According to psychologists andI kept the link and I can't find
it, but there are psychologistsout there that say this the
subconscious mind doesn'tunderstand, not.
So let me explain this to you.
(03:50):
Let me do it like this.
Let's do an experiment.
I want you to clear your mind,just blank.
Just don't think of anythingGood.
Now I want you to not thinkabout hot apple pie with vanilla
ice cream melting on top.
What just happened?
You're thinking of hot applepie.
You have a vision of hot applepie with vanilla ice cream
(04:10):
waiting on board.
I told you not to think aboutit.
Don't think about it.
Oh wait.
No, you're still thinking aboutit.
In fact, some of you now arestarting to crave it.
I'm starting to crave it.
The body doesn't understand.
Not, I don't want hot apple piewith vanilla ice cream.
All the subconscious heard isyou want hot apple pie with
vanilla ice cream.
So let me undo this for you andfor myself, because I'm on my
(04:34):
way to getting a hot apple pieand vanilla ice cream right now.
So, instead of saying not, Idon't want, say I'm good, I'm
good, I have everything I needright now.
Notice, I didn't say I don'tneed anything else or I'm not
hungry, cause, again, thesubconscious doesn't like or
understand not, and hungry iskind of a ubiquitous thing.
But no, I'm good, I'm satisfied, I have everything I want right
(04:56):
now.
Say it again I'm good, I'msatisfied.
Now, where did those thoughtsgo for that?
That I'm not going to say itagain, again because I don't
want to put it in your mind.
But where'd they go?
They're gone.
You no longer want or needthose things.
So how you think about usingyour subconscious and helping
your subconscious understand andcommunicating with it helps the
cravings as well.
(05:17):
The other thing about cravingsand this is purely ZipBound the
GLP-1s.
It's impossible for me to get abag of chips, start to eat it
and then finish that bag.
Zetbound just refuses to let medo that.
(05:37):
My body just goes okay, you'redone.
You literally don't need to eatanymore.
Stop it.
So in that sense I am gettingsome benefit of it.
But it doesn't stop the initialcraving of I wanted chips.
And if I limited myself oh Drew, you're keto, you don't get to
have chips I will then continueto want chips.
If I tell myself you can havethem, but you don't.
(05:58):
You know you can have them ifyou want Then my body goes okay
when I want I can and it relaxes.
So I hope that makes sense topeople talking about cravings
and and how to handle them.
The other thing is the type ofcravings that you have can also
mean something.
(06:18):
It's your subconscious or yourbody telling you that you need
something.
So this is from.
This was on Instagram earlierthis week from Dr Joss Axe.
He says if you're cravingchocolate, your body needs
magnesium.
That's a new one for me.
I didn't know that Interestingthat in the back of my mind.
If you're craving salty snacks,your body needs electrolytes
that I did know.
And if you're craving sugar,your body needs blood sugar
(06:38):
support.
I understand what he's sayingthere with blood sugar support,
because it's either elevatedblood sugar or low blood sugar,
and so you need to figure outwhat that is.
I have always interpreted that,or initially heard it at first,
was that if you craved sugar,specifically ice cream, that
you're dehydrated or it could bea sign of being dehydrated.
(07:00):
So when I get sugar cravings, Itend to add water and or
electrolytes just to see ifthose sugar cravings go away.
And if you're craving red meat,your body needs iron.
And if you're craving fattyfood or fried food, your body is
telling you it needs healthyfats.
So again, cravings, the type ofcraving you have, could mean
(07:22):
something.
Keep that in mind.
By not limiting ourselves, byincreasing or allowing ourselves
to eat every type of food orany type of food, it also
reduces cravings.
And then how we talk toourselves about the cravings
Again, we don't say we don'twant something.
We just say we're good, we'refine, and that will help the
cravings.
Again, we don't say we don'twant something.
We just say we're good, we'refine and that will help the
(07:43):
craving go away.
If you say you don't wantsomething, subconscious doesn't
understand that and it is goingto go try and get that for you.
So that is the topic ofcravings.
So I was going to spend thisweek this podcast talking about
cravings and other pitfalls ofdieting and how to overcome them
(08:03):
.
But in researching it I'll savethat topic for later, maybe in
a couple of weeks.
By the questions I've beengetting on Facebook and even the
question on cravings, I wantedto touch on something.
So, first of all, to those thathave reached out and asked
(08:23):
questions, keep it coming.
I love it.
If I can answer, I will.
I'm not going to pretend I haveall the answers.
Trust me, that's actually partof this is me discovering the
answers or us discovering thoseanswers together.
I still have a long road on myjourney.
I consider myself halfway there.
I still have 60 pounds to lose.
Not only that once I get there,I have to learn how to then
(08:46):
transition into maintenance mode.
And then the final question isdo I stay on Zepbound or do I
try to go off of it?
That's another two years as faras I'm concerned, but anyway,
we'll get to that.
But on the questions, I got acouple of questions of hey, I've
lost weight, or I need to lose40 pounds, or nothing is helping
(09:06):
and nothing is working, and Iwanted to take a step back and
really drive this point home.
You're kind of asking the wrongquestion, trust me.
Trust me.
I just said I need to lose 60pounds.
I understand that need, butyou're only focusing on one
thing, and that is the weightloss.
What you're really saying is Iwant a lifestyle that enables me
(09:29):
to be 60 pounds lighter and dothe things that I want to do.
Now that's a different thingthat you're building right.
If you want to lose weight, youcan go lose weight.
I've done it Again.
I've lost now almost 1,300pounds in my lifetime.
It's not about just the weightloss.
It's about enabling the system,your body, your lifestyle to
(09:51):
support you in that measure.
I think we've all heard thesaying that if you do what you
love, you never work a day inyour life.
Something along that line I'mtrying to incorporate that into
my lifestyle is I want to bringlove into everything I do.
I want to love everything Ihave.
You heard me talk about joy.
I want joy in it, and thereason for that is if you do it
(10:16):
from a place of joy, a place oflove, then you're not working.
It's not hard, because you'regetting pleasure out of it.
It's helping you meet a need,and that's what I am trying to
build with this program that itbecomes second nature, that it's
just as easy as breathing, thatI don't have those weird
(10:37):
cravings, I don't have thosethings that made me 550 pounds.
I just get rid of them,systematically get rid of them,
and that is by my steadfastness.
And this isn't a want, this isa need and of joy in my life.
If it doesn't bring me joy, Itake it out of my life.
This is a hard requirement forme.
(10:59):
I am unwavering for it.
But I wanted to talk a littlebit.
I didn't do this in the firstepisode of the podcast One,
because that was already a heavyepisode alone, just talking
about the summer of 22 andeverything that went on there,
and so I kind of left you withthis impression that you know, I
(11:19):
think the last time we weretalking I was in March 23.
I was down in San Diego and Ihad that epiphany about ZepBound
that it was giving me thefeeling of satisfaction, and
then suddenly my life wasperfect, my depression faded
away, and that's not really howit happened.
So I'm going to spend the restof this podcast talking about
what really happened there andwhy I am so adamant about joy in
(11:42):
my life.
So I'm going to take us backMarch 23.
I'm down in San Diego.
I kind of alluded that I had aslip in my diet where I ordered
my two double quarter pounderswith cheese, my two large fries
and my two Diet Cokes large DietCokes and that it was work
stress and everything else.
Well, that's only part of it.
(12:03):
There was some work stress.
I was traveling, there weresome other things going on, but
on a personal level.
So again, just remindingeveryone, in January of 23, I
went to my doctor for the firsttime in three years, had a
physical found out I had anabdominal hernia and that I was
too fat to operate on and that Ineeded to continue to lose
(12:26):
weight.
At this point in time I'dalready lost about 100 pounds.
A hernia surgeon put me onZetbound to help about my weight
.
That happened Also in lateJanuary.
Early February one of my dogs,leopold, who was my favorite dog
.
He came up limping on his rightpaw and we started noticing a
(12:50):
bulge coming out of his elbow.
So we took him to the vet.
Leo was a little stocky guy,carried a lot of weight, really
dense bone mass.
I called it his superpower.
The doc said he probably jumpedand it might be a tendon or
ligament or something in theelbow.
So we let him rest, we kept himoff it.
I put him in a cage for alittle bit and then a couple of
(13:10):
weeks went by and no, he wasstill having problems.
So we took him in for x-raysand everything and, long story
short, it ended up being inMarch, as I was heading down to
San Diego.
It ended up being cancer.
So that was weighing on me atthe same time was part of
everything going on with Leo andthe cancer.
(13:32):
And it wasn't just cancer inthe elbow that he did have some
spots in his lungs.
And for those of us that havepets, I am a proud pet parent.
They are my kids.
I love them just as much as Ilove my kids Sorry, kids I do,
but it was the first time I hadto deal with someone I love,
(13:54):
someone that close and realizingI have no control over anything
.
Now there are things I could doto help Leo, and we did.
We tried.
Yeah, that was the beginning ofme realizing that the universe
really doesn't care about me,that I am not in control of
anything, and it could be asplit second and I'm no longer
(14:17):
on this planet or someone I loveis no longer on this planet.
Fast forward a couple of months.
We're now at the end of May 23.
And we've gone back and forthwith the vet and the oncologist
with Leo, whether it was bonecancer in the elbow or lung
cancer.
It's unusual for a dog to getboth bone and lung cancer.
(14:38):
It's actually kind of unusualfor a dog to get both bone and
lung cancer.
It's actually kind of unusualfor dog to get lung cancer
initially.
But what they were saying was,if it was bone cancer, the
prognosis was six months.
We're already three months intoit or four months into it.
And if it was lung cancerthough, lung cancer could take
longer and we could amputate thearm.
If it was lung cancer in theelbow, we could amputate the arm
(15:00):
and help save him and then dochemo and some other things for
the lungs.
So my wife and I decided to dothat and I took the week off to
have Leo operated on.
The operation was Monday.
I went and picked him up it'snow Tuesday night when I brought
(15:21):
Leo home, and I'm giving somecontext here just for the rest
of the story It'll make sensehere in a second.
So that night a buddy of minefrom work called me.
His name was Ron Wetzel.
Now Ron and I have known eachother for 25, 30 years.
We were part of Disney's firstinformation security team.
In fact, ron himself was thefirst security person Disney had
(15:42):
employed, working at the DisneyInternet Group back in the late
90s.
And Ron and I had workedtogether over the years and he
had fallen on some hard timesand was looking for work.
It's hard when you're in yourmid-50s sometimes looking for
work, people don't want to hireyou because you're too old or
too qualified or whatever.
So I brought Ron intoActivision and he was just about
(16:03):
to join me on the BESA side,the business information
security side.
Actually I think technically hehad already transferred over.
Ron called me Tuesday night tocheck on Leo, check on see how
Leo's doing.
And as I was talking to Ron, hehe sounded sick, he didn't
sound well.
Um, and I knew Ron had COPD andhe.
(16:26):
So I asked him what was goingon and he said that, uh, he
thinks he had COVID again.
And I told him well, you know,knowing that he had COPD hey,
bud.
You know, if it starts gettingtoo bad, go down to the hospital
, get yourself checked in.
He's like yeah, yeah, yeah, Iwill.
So we said goodbye and sorry.
That was the last I heard fromRon.
(16:46):
A couple days later, workcontacts me that Ron hadn't
shown up for work.
Not going to give you the wholestory, but it ends up yeah, ron
had passed away that night.
Yeah, ron had passed away thatnight from complications he had
just had dental implants and putin a couple of weeks earlier
and it was a bacterial infection, that it wasn't COVID, it was
(17:08):
actually a bacterial infectionthat went to his lungs.
I know you're all wondering howthis gets to Joy, but I'm
getting there.
Move forward.
A couple of weeks, two, threeweeks later, one of Leo's best
friends was a dog we had calledlittle bit.
He was a rescue.
I mean, we knew little bit had,uh, um, a heart murmur.
Anyway, little bit, about threeweeks after ron, little bit
(17:30):
ends up, basically ends uphaving a heart attack.
I didn't know what a dog havinga heart attack sounds like, but
I now do, do Never want to hearthat again.
But so Little Bit ends uppassing away.
So I've now lost Ron, I've nowlost Little Bit and a week later
, while we thought for the firstcouple of weeks after Leo's
(17:50):
surgery, he seemed to reboundActually we thought maybe we'd
actually beaten it Three, almostfour weeks later, all of a
sudden he starts coughing,coughing, coughing.
It ends up.
It is just pure lung cancer andthere's nothing we could do and
we had to put Leo down.
So within a period of a month Ihad Ron, little Bit and Leo and
(18:10):
it broke me.
I'm telling you right now.
It crushed me.
I literally shattered all thewhile trying to still lose
weight and it actually it wasthat time period that I felt
that death was swirling aroundme and I started to feel like
maybe I'm not making it out of23, that I still.
I basically had to come togrips with death and I know this
(18:34):
is getting really heavy, reallyquick, but it was starting to
freak me out a little bit.
And, trust me, the irony thatless than a year earlier I was
already ready to walk off theplanet.
Now I'm sitting here a yearlater worrying about death.
That irony is not lost on me,but that's where I found myself
(18:55):
and where I landed on.
This was and hopefully thishelps some of you.
There is nothing I can do aboutthat.
That is the human conditionthat is out there.
There is a day waiting for me.
I have no idea.
It could be today, it could betomorrow, it could be 10 years,
20, hopefully 30 years from now,but it's coming for me.
Nothing I can do about that.
Do about that.
(19:23):
The only thing I can controlbetween now and then is how I
feel and how I let other thingsfeel, and what I mean by that is
losing Leo and losing LittleBit and losing Ron crushed my
soul.
But that was my decision to letit crush my soul.
I didn't want to think of Leoand feel sad and this huge loss,
and he wouldn't want that.
(19:44):
He'd want me to feel happyabout it.
So I purposely, every time Ithought about him a little bit,
even Ron, I think of the goodthings.
I thought of the good things,and so that learning to
reconfigure my mind to allow thegoodness into it and not obsess
about the loss, because theloss, that's just me, right,
(20:04):
that's.
I control that Again, makingthat decision.
From now until I die, I controlwhat I feel.
Well, you know what I want tofeel.
I want to feel joy, I want tofeel happiness.
I want to feel safety right,and I was.
I want to feel happiness, Iwant to feel safety Right, and I
was assuming it was all comingfrom the outside.
(20:25):
It's not, it's coming frominside.
It's coming by how I choose tointerpret things and I have
control over all of that.
So when I say I want joy in mylife, I am not kidding.
I'm deathly serious when I sayI want joy in my life, that my
diet and where I'm heading needsto bring me joy.
100,000% is what I'm trying toget to there.
(20:48):
Happiness Moving on.
So now, right behind me youcan't see it if you're just
listening to the podcast, butbehind me on the video is a
Google Home device and it isconstantly rotating through
pictures of my dogs.
They bring me happiness and joy.
Whenever I look at actuallythat's, I think, a little bit
(21:11):
right there.
I can't see, but whenever I seea picture a little bit or I see
a picture of Leo pop up onthere, I just think of all the
good times.
I don't think about my loss,that the fact that they're not
here and that pain.
Instead, I just think of them,you know, licking my face and
running around and barking andall the quirks that they had,
and it brings me happiness andit totally freed me up from that
(21:32):
depression and loss.
So, yeah, that is why I sayabout bringing joy is I have no
idea how much time I have lefton this planet.
No one does.
All I can do is choose how Ifeel between now and then and
how I go into that, and I planon doing it with love and joy
(21:54):
Flat out, that's just.
It's non-negotiable as far asI'm concerned.
So that was this week's episodeof Hacking the Fat man.
We talked about cravings andhow to deal with them, how to
talk to ourselves about cravings.
The fact that we give ourselvespermission to eat anything we
want, as long as we stay withinthe caloric limits that we've
(22:17):
set, tends to reduce cravings,because your body doesn't.
As I said, I can have a donutif I want.
I just don't feel like havingone right now.
I can't even think of the lasttime I ate a donut, but if I had
told myself I couldn't, whatwe're saying every time, the
subconscious doesn't understand.
Not, you don't get to havedonuts, drew.
(22:37):
Right now, my subconscious is Iwant a donut, and it would
continue to do that if I keptthat conversation going.
So instead I say I'm good, I'msatisfied, I'm happy, and it
just disappears.
We also talked about why we wantto put joy in our life, and to
again drive this point home isthe weight loss, and where you
(22:57):
want to go is secondary.
It's not the primary thing thatyou're actually building.
What you're really saying is Iwant a lifestyle that enables me
to be 40 pounds for me, 60pounds less that, to be active
and to be 175 pounds with the10% body fat.
That's kind of the picture I'mdeveloping for myself right now.
(23:20):
That's the life I'm buildingand I still have a lot of work
to go the 60 pounds.
I'm in no hurry to get to the60 pounds because I'm making
sure that it is my everydayroutine that is supporting it.
It's why I'm not gettingfrustrated with the plateaus,
and I still have a whole bunchof work left in front of me.
(23:42):
Not only do I have to get the 60pounds down, I have to learn to
get into maintenance mode andkeep that weight and increase my
activity.
I want to paddleboard, I wantto go scuba diving, I want to
actually run a triathlon or do atriathlon.
Well, how's my diet going tochange, trying to accomplish all
those things and still maintainthe weight, or at least keep it
(24:03):
at the weight I want, whileachieving those goals.
So I still have a whole lot tolearn.
I hope you come along with mefor the ride as we learn them
together.
I don't have all the answers.
I'm not going to pretend totell you I have all the answers.
I'm just going to give you howI've thought about it and what
I'm working on right now.
So anyway, thank you forjoining me.
I really appreciate all of youand we will see you next week
(24:27):
for Hacking the Fat man.
Cheers, bye.
Hi, welcome to the third episode of Hacking the Fat
man.
First of all, happy Father'sDay to everyone out there.
Brief update, quick updatestill hovering at 230.
My weight's bouncing a couplepounds here and there, but
according to my scale, I'vegained 6% muscle and I've
dropped 6% fat over the lastthree weeks.
So it's just my bodyreconfiguring itself Right now.
(00:20):
It's not uncommon, it happensquite often, and so I just
continue to do what I do.
I know it's going to work.
I know at some point I willhave another big drop when my
body is ready to do it Again.
This isn't about necessarilythe weight loss right, that's an
end goal of it but it's aboutestablishing a lifestyle, a
(00:41):
process that I can wake up everyday that will enable me to live
that life, and we're going toget into that today on the
podcast, before I get started ornot before I get started,
because I've already started Atthe end of last week's episode I
read a question from my buddy,tom, asking me about cravings
and how I handle cravings.
(01:01):
And to answer that questionthere are cravings and there are
cravings.
And there are cravings andthere are cravings and how I
handle cravings.
And to answer that questionthere are cravings and there are
cravings and there are cravingsand there are cravings, meaning
there are a bunch of differenttypes of cravings.
There are a bunch of reasonswhy we have cravings.
So I want to address the firstone, because this actually kind
of stumped me a little bit,because I don't necessarily have
cravings.
(01:21):
I get that oh pizza sounds goodtonight, or lasagna or get
those, but I don't necessarilyhave cream.
I get the oh pizza sounds goodtonight, or lasagna or get those
, but I don't get.
You know where?
I wake up in the morning andI'm craving something and until
I eat it, I you know I'm justgoing to be miserable.
I don't get those much anymore,and a lot of it comes from the
fact that I'm not limitingmyself in my diet.
Right, I literally can eatanything.
(01:43):
That's what I'm trying to telleveryone is you don't have to
limit and restrict your diet.
Now, you should in certaincases, but that's because you
want to do it, not becauseyou're forced to do it.
And that reminds me of a story.
I believe this came out ofSunday school, but it was the
story of a city dog versus acountry dog, and it's about
(02:05):
learning that if you giveyourself restraints or
restrictions that itautomatically, subconsciously,
creates this need to go againstthose restrictions.
So if you think of a city dog,right, city dog lives in an
apartment or lives in a smallbackyard and the second that
door's open they're gone.
Right, they want to go exploreand see things because all
(02:26):
they've known is this littlearea.
But a country dog, if you thinka country dog that's got no
fences can go, have all theseacres that it can go roam around
, where do you find a countrydog?
Well, you find that country dog, usually sleeping on the porch,
because it can go do anythingit wants.
It's fine and content where itis.
And that's true for us, right,you give yourself limits and
(02:47):
sometimes you're going to wantto rebel against those limits,
literally.
This morning I had to not forcemyself but I wasn't in the mood
taking my supplements because Ihave to do it every single day
and I'm like you know what, I'mgetting a little tired of it.
I still ended up taking mysupplements because, ultimately,
I know how they make me feel,but sometimes it gets a little
tough.
So, by not giving ourselveslimits, by giving us ourselves
(03:08):
the freedom to go and eatwhatever we want If I want a
donut today, I'll have a donut.
I just need to account for thecalories.
If you want ice cream, you canhave ice cream.
You just need to account forthe calories.
Now, and if I also know that ifI continue to eat those things,
or only those things, I'm goingto feel horrible.
So, anyway, give yourself theability to eat anything, don't
limit yourself, and you'll findthat some of the cravings go
(03:29):
away.
The other thing about cravingsis also how you're processing
those in your head.
Let me give you an example ofthis.
According to psychologists andI kept the link and I can't find
it, but there are psychologistsout there that say this the
subconscious mind doesn'tunderstand, not.
So let me explain this to you.
(03:50):
Let me do it like this.
Let's do an experiment.
I want you to clear your mind,just blank.
Just don't think of anythingGood.
Now I want you to not thinkabout hot apple pie with vanilla
ice cream melting on top.
What just happened?
You're thinking of hot applepie.
You have a vision of hot applepie with vanilla ice cream
(04:10):
waiting on board.
I told you not to think aboutit.
Don't think about it.
Oh wait.
No, you're still thinking aboutit.
In fact, some of you now arestarting to crave it.
I'm starting to crave it.
The body doesn't understand.
Not, I don't want hot apple piewith vanilla ice cream.
All the subconscious heard isyou want hot apple pie with
vanilla ice cream.
So let me undo this for you andfor myself, because I'm on my
(04:34):
way to getting a hot apple pieand vanilla ice cream right now.
So, instead of saying not, Idon't want, say I'm good, I'm
good, I have everything I needright now.
Notice, I didn't say I don'tneed anything else or I'm not
hungry, cause, again, thesubconscious doesn't like or
understand not, and hungry iskind of a ubiquitous thing.
But no, I'm good, I'm satisfied, I have everything I want right
(04:56):
now.
Say it again I'm good, I'msatisfied.
Now, where did those thoughtsgo for that?
That I'm not going to say itagain, again because I don't
want to put it in your mind.
But where'd they go?
They're gone.
You no longer want or needthose things.
So how you think about usingyour subconscious and helping
your subconscious understand andcommunicating with it helps the
cravings as well.
(05:17):
The other thing about cravingsand this is purely ZipBound the
GLP-1s.
It's impossible for me to get abag of chips, start to eat it
and then finish that bag.
Zetbound just refuses to let medo that.
(05:37):
My body just goes okay, you'redone.
You literally don't need to eatanymore.
Stop it.
So in that sense I am gettingsome benefit of it.
But it doesn't stop the initialcraving of I wanted chips.
And if I limited myself oh Drew, you're keto, you don't get to
have chips I will then continueto want chips.
If I tell myself you can havethem, but you don't.
(05:58):
You know you can have them ifyou want Then my body goes okay
when I want I can and it relaxes.
So I hope that makes sense topeople talking about cravings
and and how to handle them.
The other thing is the type ofcravings that you have can also
mean something.
(06:18):
It's your subconscious or yourbody telling you that you need
something.
So this is from.
This was on Instagram earlierthis week from Dr Joss Axe.
He says if you're cravingchocolate, your body needs
magnesium.
That's a new one for me.
I didn't know that Interestingthat in the back of my mind.
If you're craving salty snacks,your body needs electrolytes
that I did know.
And if you're craving sugar,your body needs blood sugar
(06:38):
support.
I understand what he's sayingthere with blood sugar support,
because it's either elevatedblood sugar or low blood sugar,
and so you need to figure outwhat that is.
I have always interpreted that,or initially heard it at first,
was that if you craved sugar,specifically ice cream, that
you're dehydrated or it could bea sign of being dehydrated.
(07:00):
So when I get sugar cravings, Itend to add water and or
electrolytes just to see ifthose sugar cravings go away.
And if you're craving red meat,your body needs iron.
And if you're craving fattyfood or fried food, your body is
telling you it needs healthyfats.
So again, cravings, the type ofcraving you have, could mean
(07:22):
something.
Keep that in mind.
By not limiting ourselves, byincreasing or allowing ourselves
to eat every type of food orany type of food, it also
reduces cravings.
And then how we talk toourselves about the cravings
Again, we don't say we don'twant something.
We just say we're good, we'refine, and that will help the
cravings.
Again, we don't say we don'twant something.
We just say we're good, we'refine and that will help the
(07:43):
craving go away.
If you say you don't wantsomething, subconscious doesn't
understand that and it is goingto go try and get that for you.
So that is the topic ofcravings.
So I was going to spend thisweek this podcast talking about
cravings and other pitfalls ofdieting and how to overcome them
(08:03):
.
But in researching it I'll savethat topic for later, maybe in
a couple of weeks.
By the questions I've beengetting on Facebook and even the
question on cravings, I wantedto touch on something.
So, first of all, to those thathave reached out and asked
(08:23):
questions, keep it coming.
I love it.
If I can answer, I will.
I'm not going to pretend I haveall the answers.
Trust me, that's actually partof this is me discovering the
answers or us discovering thoseanswers together.
I still have a long road on myjourney.
I consider myself halfway there.
I still have 60 pounds to lose.
Not only that once I get there,I have to learn how to then
(08:46):
transition into maintenance mode.
And then the final question isdo I stay on Zepbound or do I
try to go off of it?
That's another two years as faras I'm concerned, but anyway,
we'll get to that.
But on the questions, I got acouple of questions of hey, I've
lost weight, or I need to lose40 pounds, or nothing is helping
(09:06):
and nothing is working, and Iwanted to take a step back and
really drive this point home.
You're kind of asking the wrongquestion, trust me.
Trust me.
I just said I need to lose 60pounds.
I understand that need, butyou're only focusing on one
thing, and that is the weightloss.
What you're really saying is Iwant a lifestyle that enables me
(09:29):
to be 60 pounds lighter and dothe things that I want to do.
Now that's a different thingthat you're building right.
If you want to lose weight, youcan go lose weight.
I've done it Again.
I've lost now almost 1,300pounds in my lifetime.
It's not about just the weightloss.
It's about enabling the system,your body, your lifestyle to
(09:51):
support you in that measure.
I think we've all heard thesaying that if you do what you
love, you never work a day inyour life.
Something along that line I'mtrying to incorporate that into
my lifestyle is I want to bringlove into everything I do.
I want to love everything Ihave.
You heard me talk about joy.
I want joy in it, and thereason for that is if you do it
(10:16):
from a place of joy, a place oflove, then you're not working.
It's not hard, because you'regetting pleasure out of it.
It's helping you meet a need,and that's what I am trying to
build with this program that itbecomes second nature, that it's
just as easy as breathing, thatI don't have those weird
(10:37):
cravings, I don't have thosethings that made me 550 pounds.
I just get rid of them,systematically get rid of them,
and that is by my steadfastness.
And this isn't a want, this isa need and of joy in my life.
If it doesn't bring me joy, Itake it out of my life.
This is a hard requirement forme.
(10:59):
I am unwavering for it.
But I wanted to talk a littlebit.
I didn't do this in the firstepisode of the podcast One,
because that was already a heavyepisode alone, just talking
about the summer of 22 andeverything that went on there,
and so I kind of left you withthis impression that you know, I
(11:19):
think the last time we weretalking I was in March 23.
I was down in San Diego and Ihad that epiphany about ZepBound
that it was giving me thefeeling of satisfaction, and
then suddenly my life wasperfect, my depression faded
away, and that's not really howit happened.
So I'm going to spend the restof this podcast talking about
what really happened there andwhy I am so adamant about joy in
(11:42):
my life.
So I'm going to take us backMarch 23.
I'm down in San Diego.
I kind of alluded that I had aslip in my diet where I ordered
my two double quarter pounderswith cheese, my two large fries
and my two Diet Cokes large DietCokes and that it was work
stress and everything else.
Well, that's only part of it.
(12:03):
There was some work stress.
I was traveling, there weresome other things going on, but
on a personal level.
So again, just remindingeveryone, in January of 23, I
went to my doctor for the firsttime in three years, had a
physical found out I had anabdominal hernia and that I was
too fat to operate on and that Ineeded to continue to lose
(12:26):
weight.
At this point in time I'dalready lost about 100 pounds.
A hernia surgeon put me onZetbound to help about my weight
.
That happened Also in lateJanuary.
Early February one of my dogs,leopold, who was my favorite dog
.
He came up limping on his rightpaw and we started noticing a
(12:50):
bulge coming out of his elbow.
So we took him to the vet.
Leo was a little stocky guy,carried a lot of weight, really
dense bone mass.
I called it his superpower.
The doc said he probably jumpedand it might be a tendon or
ligament or something in theelbow.
So we let him rest, we kept himoff it.
I put him in a cage for alittle bit and then a couple of
(13:10):
weeks went by and no, he wasstill having problems.
So we took him in for x-raysand everything and, long story
short, it ended up being inMarch, as I was heading down to
San Diego.
It ended up being cancer.
So that was weighing on me atthe same time was part of
everything going on with Leo andthe cancer.
(13:32):
And it wasn't just cancer inthe elbow that he did have some
spots in his lungs.
And for those of us that havepets, I am a proud pet parent.
They are my kids.
I love them just as much as Ilove my kids Sorry, kids I do,
but it was the first time I hadto deal with someone I love,
(13:54):
someone that close and realizingI have no control over anything
.
Now there are things I could doto help Leo, and we did.
We tried.
Yeah, that was the beginning ofme realizing that the universe
really doesn't care about me,that I am not in control of
anything, and it could be asplit second and I'm no longer
(14:17):
on this planet or someone I loveis no longer on this planet.
Fast forward a couple of months.
We're now at the end of May 23.
And we've gone back and forthwith the vet and the oncologist
with Leo, whether it was bonecancer in the elbow or lung
cancer.
It's unusual for a dog to getboth bone and lung cancer.
(14:38):
It's actually kind of unusualfor a dog to get both bone and
lung cancer.
It's actually kind of unusualfor dog to get lung cancer
initially.
But what they were saying was,if it was bone cancer, the
prognosis was six months.
We're already three months intoit or four months into it.
And if it was lung cancerthough, lung cancer could take
longer and we could amputate thearm.
If it was lung cancer in theelbow, we could amputate the arm
(15:00):
and help save him and then dochemo and some other things for
the lungs.
So my wife and I decided to dothat and I took the week off to
have Leo operated on.
The operation was Monday.
I went and picked him up it'snow Tuesday night when I brought
(15:21):
Leo home, and I'm giving somecontext here just for the rest
of the story It'll make sensehere in a second.
So that night a buddy of minefrom work called me.
His name was Ron Wetzel.
Now Ron and I have known eachother for 25, 30 years.
We were part of Disney's firstinformation security team.
In fact, ron himself was thefirst security person Disney had
(15:42):
employed, working at the DisneyInternet Group back in the late
90s.
And Ron and I had workedtogether over the years and he
had fallen on some hard timesand was looking for work.
It's hard when you're in yourmid-50s sometimes looking for
work, people don't want to hireyou because you're too old or
too qualified or whatever.
So I brought Ron intoActivision and he was just about
(16:03):
to join me on the BESA side,the business information
security side.
Actually I think technically hehad already transferred over.
Ron called me Tuesday night tocheck on Leo, check on see how
Leo's doing.
And as I was talking to Ron, hehe sounded sick, he didn't
sound well.
Um, and I knew Ron had COPD andhe.
(16:26):
So I asked him what was goingon and he said that, uh, he
thinks he had COVID again.
And I told him well, you know,knowing that he had COPD hey,
bud.
You know, if it starts gettingtoo bad, go down to the hospital
, get yourself checked in.
He's like yeah, yeah, yeah, Iwill.
So we said goodbye and sorry.
That was the last I heard fromRon.
(16:46):
A couple days later, workcontacts me that Ron hadn't
shown up for work.
Not going to give you the wholestory, but it ends up yeah, ron
had passed away that night.
Yeah, ron had passed away thatnight from complications he had
just had dental implants and putin a couple of weeks earlier
and it was a bacterial infection, that it wasn't COVID, it was
(17:08):
actually a bacterial infectionthat went to his lungs.
I know you're all wondering howthis gets to Joy, but I'm
getting there.
Move forward.
A couple of weeks, two, threeweeks later, one of Leo's best
friends was a dog we had calledlittle bit.
He was a rescue.
I mean, we knew little bit had,uh, um, a heart murmur.
Anyway, little bit, about threeweeks after ron, little bit
(17:30):
ends up, basically ends uphaving a heart attack.
I didn't know what a dog havinga heart attack sounds like, but
I now do, do Never want to hearthat again.
But so Little Bit ends uppassing away.
So I've now lost Ron, I've nowlost Little Bit and a week later
, while we thought for the firstcouple of weeks after Leo's
(17:50):
surgery, he seemed to reboundActually we thought maybe we'd
actually beaten it Three, almostfour weeks later, all of a
sudden he starts coughing,coughing, coughing.
It ends up.
It is just pure lung cancer andthere's nothing we could do and
we had to put Leo down.
So within a period of a month Ihad Ron, little Bit and Leo and
(18:10):
it broke me.
I'm telling you right now.
It crushed me.
I literally shattered all thewhile trying to still lose
weight and it actually it wasthat time period that I felt
that death was swirling aroundme and I started to feel like
maybe I'm not making it out of23, that I still.
I basically had to come togrips with death and I know this
(18:34):
is getting really heavy, reallyquick, but it was starting to
freak me out a little bit.
And, trust me, the irony thatless than a year earlier I was
already ready to walk off theplanet.
Now I'm sitting here a yearlater worrying about death.
That irony is not lost on me,but that's where I found myself
(18:55):
and where I landed on.
This was and hopefully thishelps some of you.
There is nothing I can do aboutthat.
That is the human conditionthat is out there.
There is a day waiting for me.
I have no idea.
It could be today, it could betomorrow, it could be 10 years,
20, hopefully 30 years from now,but it's coming for me.
Nothing I can do about that.
Do about that.
(19:23):
The only thing I can controlbetween now and then is how I
feel and how I let other thingsfeel, and what I mean by that is
losing Leo and losing LittleBit and losing Ron crushed my
soul.
But that was my decision to letit crush my soul.
I didn't want to think of Leoand feel sad and this huge loss,
and he wouldn't want that.
(19:44):
He'd want me to feel happyabout it.
So I purposely, every time Ithought about him a little bit,
even Ron, I think of the goodthings.
I thought of the good things,and so that learning to
reconfigure my mind to allow thegoodness into it and not obsess
about the loss, because theloss, that's just me, right,
(20:04):
that's.
I control that Again, makingthat decision.
From now until I die, I controlwhat I feel.
Well, you know what I want tofeel.
I want to feel joy, I want tofeel happiness.
I want to feel safety right,and I was.
I want to feel happiness, Iwant to feel safety Right, and I
was assuming it was all comingfrom the outside.
(20:25):
It's not, it's coming frominside.
It's coming by how I choose tointerpret things and I have
control over all of that.
So when I say I want joy in mylife, I am not kidding.
I'm deathly serious when I sayI want joy in my life, that my
diet and where I'm heading needsto bring me joy.
100,000% is what I'm trying toget to there.
(20:48):
Happiness Moving on.
So now, right behind me youcan't see it if you're just
listening to the podcast, butbehind me on the video is a
Google Home device and it isconstantly rotating through
pictures of my dogs.
They bring me happiness and joy.
Whenever I look at actuallythat's, I think, a little bit
(21:11):
right there.
I can't see, but whenever I seea picture a little bit or I see
a picture of Leo pop up onthere, I just think of all the
good times.
I don't think about my loss,that the fact that they're not
here and that pain.
Instead, I just think of them,you know, licking my face and
running around and barking andall the quirks that they had,
and it brings me happiness andit totally freed me up from that
(21:32):
depression and loss.
So, yeah, that is why I sayabout bringing joy is I have no
idea how much time I have lefton this planet.
No one does.
All I can do is choose how Ifeel between now and then and
how I go into that, and I planon doing it with love and joy
(21:54):
Flat out, that's just.
It's non-negotiable as far asI'm concerned.
So that was this week's episodeof Hacking the Fat man.
We talked about cravings andhow to deal with them, how to
talk to ourselves about cravings.
The fact that we give ourselvespermission to eat anything we
want, as long as we stay withinthe caloric limits that we've
(22:17):
set, tends to reduce cravings,because your body doesn't.
As I said, I can have a donutif I want.
I just don't feel like havingone right now.
I can't even think of the lasttime I ate a donut, but if I had
told myself I couldn't, whatwe're saying every time, the
subconscious doesn't understand.
Not, you don't get to havedonuts, drew.
(22:37):
Right now, my subconscious is Iwant a donut, and it would
continue to do that if I keptthat conversation going.
So instead I say I'm good, I'msatisfied, I'm happy, and it
just disappears.
We also talked about why we wantto put joy in our life, and to
again drive this point home isthe weight loss, and where you
(22:57):
want to go is secondary.
It's not the primary thing thatyou're actually building.
What you're really saying is Iwant a lifestyle that enables me
to be 40 pounds for me, 60pounds less that, to be active
and to be 175 pounds with the10% body fat.
That's kind of the picture I'mdeveloping for myself right now.
(23:20):
That's the life I'm buildingand I still have a lot of work
to go the 60 pounds.
I'm in no hurry to get to the60 pounds because I'm making
sure that it is my everydayroutine that is supporting it.
It's why I'm not gettingfrustrated with the plateaus,
and I still have a whole bunchof work left in front of me.
(23:42):
Not only do I have to get the 60pounds down, I have to learn to
get into maintenance mode andkeep that weight and increase my
activity.
I want to paddleboard, I wantto go scuba diving, I want to
actually run a triathlon or do atriathlon.
Well, how's my diet going tochange, trying to accomplish all
those things and still maintainthe weight, or at least keep it
(24:03):
at the weight I want, whileachieving those goals.
So I still have a whole lot tolearn.
I hope you come along with mefor the ride as we learn them
together.
I don't have all the answers.
I'm not going to pretend totell you I have all the answers.
I'm just going to give you howI've thought about it and what
I'm working on right now.
So anyway, thank you forjoining me.
I really appreciate all of youand we will see you next week
(24:27):
for Hacking the Fat man.
Cheers, bye.
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