October 28, 2025 • 28 mins
Parenting on the Same Page: Strategies for Unified Parenting
In this episode of the Home and Marriage Podcast, Lennon and Christal Noland discuss the importance of unified parenting and the impact it has on the family. They explore the differences between how moms and dads parent, shaped by their own upbringing and personalities. They highlight the necessity of presenting a united front to children to avoid conflict and tension and share personal anecdotes about their own parenting experiences, from setting disciplinary standards to preparing for their children's departure from home. Essential advice includes talking to your spouse to align parenting philosophies, seeking God's guidance, and learning from experienced parents. The episode is packed with practical tips and wisdom aimed at helping couples become better at home and stronger together.
00:00 Introduction: The Importance of Unified Parenting
00:41 Welcome Back: Weekend Plans and Fun
04:15 Parenting Differences: Moms vs. Dads
13:50 Personal Stories: Parenting Styles and Backgrounds
16:47 Unified Front: The Key to Effective Parenting
22:32 Practical Advice: Consistency and Seeking Wisdom
27:26 Conclusion: Encouragement
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Lennon (00:03):
And if you can't parent on the same page, what will
happen is you end up inconflict, right?
Going behind the scenes, undoingwhat the other one has done.
All sorts of unhealthy behaviorsthat can really cause tension
between a husband and a wife.
Christal (00:16):
Yeah, it's really so important that we're unified.
Kids do need to see theirparents as a team and not
competitors.
Lennon (00:27):
This is the Home and Marriage Podcast with Lennon and
Christal Noland, where we helpcouples become better at home
and stronger Together, we arehusband and wife, parents and
ministers who want God's bestfor our home and yours.
Hey friends, welcome back to theshow.
So glad that you're here with ustoday and, as we are recording,
and actually whenever you arelistening, the weekend is coming
(00:50):
and this is a week where I'mglad it is, uh, both because
it's been a busy week, but alsowe got some good stuff coming
up.
Christal (00:56):
Yeah, I live for the weekends, Lennon.
I do.
And it's when,
Lennon (01:00):
it's when you, it's when you get turned as the kids say.
Oh, what does that mean?
Christal (01:05):
What does that even mean?
It's, it's
Lennon (01:07):
not good.
This is a joke.
I'm, I'm making a joke.
Oh, that's on the, the old Homeand Marriage podcast.
I thought
Christal (01:11):
that was Yeah, that's something we probably couldn't
put on this We to mark.
Well,
Lennon (01:14):
it's so we, it's something we wouldn't do.
First of, are
Christal (01:16):
we gonna have to mark, uh, explicit now on our podcast?
Maybe
Lennon (01:19):
so.
Oh no.
We'd probably have to markcringe because that's what our
kids would do if they heardtheir dad use the word turnt.
Yeah.
I
Christal (01:26):
don't even know what that word means.
I don't even wanna know whatthat word means.
But anyways, I think
Lennon (01:29):
it meant, and first of all, it meant something like
four years ago.
And it that it probably doesn't,it's probably not a word that's
actually used anymore.
Let's just move on from this.
What are we looking forward tofor this weekend?
Christal (01:41):
Well, I will say there's been many times that
we've said words that we thoughtwere fine back in our day, back
in the nineties, early twothousands that we used, and our
kids have informed us that thatword means something else.
And so we're like, oh, no.
Well,
Lennon (01:55):
they've done that when we've tried to bandwagon on a
word that it seems like theywere using five minutes ago.
Christal (02:00):
I know you can't keep up with these kids.
Lennon (02:02):
No one does that anymore.
No one says that,
Christal (02:04):
bro.
Bro.
I do know.
They say, bro.
And as I learned from JimmyFallon, they say a hundred
percent.
A hundred percent.
Lennon (02:11):
Yeah.
Jimmy Fallon, he's, he's theguide of all of all parenting
lingo.
Christal (02:14):
Anyways, all right, let's move on.
Yes.
Okay.
So this weekend, uh, one thingI'm looking forward to,
definitely looking forward todate night tonight we have that.
Lennon (02:22):
We do,
Christal (02:23):
Saturday night we already have a plan to watch
Lord of the Rings.
And we are big Lord of the Ringsnerds here at our, well.
I won't speak for our kids.
Some of them love it more thanothers, but for me and you, we
love Lord of the Rings, don'twe?
Lennon (02:37):
We do love some Tolkien and they did such a good job
with those movies.
And there's something about theholiday season.
We're here at the end of Octoberheading into the good stuff that
always sparks this feeling likeit's time to enjoy a few
classics.
And so yeah, we got Lord of theRings coming, but we're not just
gonna watch.
A Lord of the Rings movie, youalso have a good plan for us to
(02:59):
eat some Lord of the Ringsappropriate food.
Christal (03:02):
Yeah, I, I'm doing basic Lord of the Rings food,
but I am making a roast.
That night, you know, roast withpotatoes and carrots
Lennon (03:10):
as carrots as Sam Wise would say.
Potatoes.
Christal (03:13):
Potatoes.
And then we will have some kindof like dessert.
It's not really Lord of theRings theme, but we will have a
dessert.
But, yeah, I, I thought aboutgoing all out, like I got on
Pinterest and started looking atall the cool recipes for Lord of
the Rings nights, but they wereintense.
Like you can make.
Lumps.
Lius limbus.
Limbus bread.
(03:34):
Yeah.
Which is like the Elvin bread.
You can make that yourself andwrap it in like leaves and make
it look like elf bread.
And so I thought about that fora moment, but I was like, that's
gonna take too much time forthat.
I dunno if I had the time to doall that.
Lennon (03:47):
Well, that's okay.
That's the thing.
That's a preview of holidaypressures in general, right?
Oh, lots of things are cute, butto try to do all the cute things
just kind of takes the joy outof everything and makes it way
too much work to even have fun.
Christal (04:01):
Hey, and I know we're gonna have an episode coming up
pretty soon about the holidays.
We will, we're gonna talk aboutthe, the pressures of the
holidays, how to get throughyour holidays with peace,
hopefully, so that's common.
That will be good.
That's gonna be a fun episode.
Lennon (04:14):
It will be.
So we're gonna talk aboutparenting today and specifically
kind of the different thingsthat a husband and wife, that a
mom and dad.
Bring to the table.
And it's not just specificbetween a mom and dad, sometimes
just two parents aspersonalities and the
experiences we've had growingup, we can just parent
(04:35):
differently.
And this can either be a sourceof strength or it can be a
source of frustration.
And probably over time it'sgonna, we're gonna experience
both at some point.
Right,
Christal (04:45):
exactly.
Because we are two differentpeople raised in different homes
and I think.
First of all, just marriage ingeneral.
You deal with a lot of thingsbecause you are so different,
right?
Men and women are different.
We know that's just a fact.
And then you and I, just out ofour own experience, we know
we're different people.
We think at the beginning, likewe said last week, we think
(05:07):
we're so the same.
And then you get married andrealize you're not exactly the
same and you're you.
You handle situations verydifferently.
And I think in parenting itreally comes to light.
We start to see that.
We are just very different.
And the way we see thissituation is different too.
And that, I think that plays injust as, like I'm saying, person
(05:30):
to person, but also men andwomen, mothers and fathers are
very different.
Right.
Lennon (05:35):
Yeah.
And that's, and that's animportant thing to recognize and
it's also an important thing toappreciate.
Christal (05:41):
Yeah.
Lennon (05:41):
So why don't we lean into that just for a second,
that moms and dads themselves.
Are different.
Mm-hmm.
God designed us to bring uniquestrengths and to need each other
in specific ways.
And so what's one of thedifferences you think that
really come to light with how amom and how a dad approached
parenting?
Christal (06:02):
I say the first things that come to mind about dads and
mom's tendencies are dads tendto be really good at encouraging
and pushing a kid into what theyneed to learn or grow into, or,
they really believe, Hey, let's.
Let's let'em do this thing.
Right.
And the moms tend to be way morenurturing and comforting and, oh
(06:24):
wait, maybe they're not readyfor that thing yet, so let's
just hold on to'em a littlelonger.
You know, we tend to be thatway.
Yesss what comes to my mindfirst?
Lennon (06:32):
That's a pretty common one.
And all of these things show upin the other parent at times,
but these are kind of broadthemes.
Yeah.
And you are right that as a dadI am.
Sometimes from a much too earlyage, I'm like, no, they're ready
for this.
They can, they can do this, andthey're, they're gonna be fine.
Tough it out.
And that mom does want to leanin and encourage.
Christal (06:54):
Yeah.
I remember when our kids firststarted learning to ride bikes.
Yeah.
So we have, three kids that arevery close in age.
The first two only have twoyears between them, and then the
last two have seven monthsbecause our youngest is adopted.
So we have this almost likeIrish twins that, that we
raised, yeah.
In the home anyways.
(07:16):
I remember the day Addie hadalready been riding her bike.
She's older, and then Ethan waslearning to ride his bike with
the neighborhood kids.
First of all.
I didn't even know this wasgoing on outside, that they were
learning to ride bikes.
Yeah.
And this,
Lennon (07:28):
this was the big remove the training wheels day.
Christal (07:31):
Oh yeah.
Yeah.
And so I remember being reallynervous and, and them saying,
oh, look, Ethan can ride a bike.
And we go out there and he'slearning how to maneuver that
bike, you know, and I feltnervous.
I was always scared.
They're gonna, they're gonnahurt themselves,
Lennon (07:45):
like he'll be fine.
Rub some dirt on it, he'll befine.
Christal (07:48):
And then Lizzie the same day.
I wanna learn too.
My natural tendency was say,let's just wait a little longer
for you to learn.
I think I can only handle onekid at a time as they're
learning to ride their bike.
But you would be very differentin that situation.
Lennon (08:03):
Yeah, I, I remember.
So specifically hearing ouroldest say, dad, look at Lizzie
and, and her and another one ofthe neighborhood kids were kinda
walking alongside her, pushingher on the bike, and then they
just all forehand.
Came off the bike and there wasLizzie wobbling and riding down
the driveway.
And I mean, goodness, that'sjust a picture of a million
(08:26):
things that come up as our kidsdo get older.
And you're right, dads dodefault into kind of you can,
you can do this.
Go for it.
Toughen up.
And moms have kind of anurturing and comforting heart
for sure.
Christal (08:40):
They do.
Another thing that this makes methink of is how, With moms being
more nurturing and comforting.
Moms understand daughters betterbecause they're a woman.
Right?
There's just things that youunderstand about your daughter
that dads may not get, and itmay be harder for moms to even
understand things about theirsons that the dads are gonna
know.
(09:00):
Yeah.
And understand.
So I, that's, that's really a, agreat thing to have, and we'll
talk a little bit more aboutthat later.
But one story that comes to mymind too, personally, I remember
when I was about 13.
And you know what happens around13 for girls?
Yes.
So I remember being very justemotional.
And one night we were sitting atthe dinner table, and I cannot
(09:23):
tell you why I was crying, but Istarted to cry over something
that happened and I was justeating my dinner crying and my
dad being the loving dad, hewouldn't know how to fix it.
Right.
But he could not figure, and Icouldn't tell him.
What was wrong?
He couldn't figure it out.
And I was just crying.
And I remember him saying,there's nothing to cry about
what's going on?
(09:43):
I mean, why are you crying?
And my mom jumping in in thatmoment of just like, honey,
she's just going through somethings right now as a woman.
And I remember leaving the tableand going to my room, like
crying, and my mom comes backthere and she's like.
Listen, this is part of, this isa part of the changes that
you're going through help,helping me understand, but then
(10:05):
helping my dad understand.
Yes.
So
Lennon (10:08):
that's such a, a key thing of moms helping dads
understand and dads helping momsunderstand.
With sons, there is someexpertise we have with our.
Our gender because we've beenthere and done that.
And I know so many singleparents have to bear the burden
of raising their kids bythemselves and have to look for
(10:28):
ways to, uh, supplement thestrengths that they bring to the
table.
But we should never take forgranted having one another.
Like, I need you.
To help me understand theseyoung women that we have in our
house right now.
And you need me to help youunderstand our son.
Christal (10:45):
That's right.
And this makes me also think ofanother phase that we have not
gotten to yet, but we areapproaching and I think that's
the whole kids, you know,leaving the home, leaving the
nest, and the way that we handlethat, and I will just say.
Already preparing for that.
Mentally, I'm, I get way moreemotional.
(11:05):
You get emotional.
I know you do, but I like crymore often about thinking of our
oldest one leaving to college.
Um, I post, um, a senior Sundaypicture most every Sunday
because it helps me like startto mourn that loss.
Yeah.
You know, that's the way I'mhandling it, but I have a
(11:25):
feeling.
You, I will be crying a lot moreoften, more days, not because I
love my daughter more, It'sbecause I, I handle it.
It's harder for me letting goand I think you're really good.
And dads tend to be really goodat preparing them and pushing
them out into the world as well.
Not that moms can't, because Iknow there are moments that.
(11:47):
I rise up and say, Nope, you'regonna do this because you need
to learn the real world.
Lennon (11:52):
Right, right.
So moms and dads do havedifferences, but we don't just
bring to the table of parenting,our gender roles, per se.
We also bring to the table whowe have grown up to become, and
sometimes our backgrounds thetype of household we grew up in.
The, the clinical term is right.
Our family of origin and allthat entails also affects how we
(12:17):
think about parenting, whetherit's stuff we want to emulate or
it's things that weinstinctively run from, and so
that can have a big effect Onthe tone of a home, what kind of
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So for me, as far as something Ithink about in our home, I came
up from a home that was touchedby divorce.
So I I had a stepmother, forpart of my life.
I had a stepfather as well.
All of those things introducedinteresting dynamics and so,
(14:07):
You, on the other hand, camefrom an intact family.
You grew up with mom and dad,married, they're still married.
You had a brother and then areally young brother in the
household.
We had two pretty differentexperiences growing up.
Christal (14:21):
We did, and I think about that, not only just having
The situation, having marriedparents still together versus
divorced and the kind of stuffyou go through, with both of
those situations, for me, we hadresponsibilities at the house,
like we did chores for sure.
But I know for you, you had likea crazy chore situation versus
(14:45):
the way I had it.
Lennon (14:47):
My stepmother, who has passed away now, but she was
really a drill sergeant of thehousehold.
She was gonna have no kids justlaying around and sleeping in.
I had a Saturday.
Chore schedule,
Christal (14:59):
right?
That
Lennon (14:59):
would take my friend's breath away.
They could not believe, and notjust Saturdays, but a lot of
times in the house as well.
And so for us parenting that'sreally shaped me and what I
expect that our kids can, can doand how they can contribute
around the household.
And maybe sometimes I can get alittle bit extreme and you have
(15:20):
to reign me in on some things,but that's something that we
have to realize that withwhatever background we've both
come out of.
It's not necessarily the casethat everything we learned was
ideal.
Mm-hmm.
And just because our spouse wentthrough something different,
they don't have any values tobring to the table.
That might be beneficial aswell.
Even if they're different thanours.
Christal (15:41):
Yeah.
I think no matter what, everyperson.
comes to a place, whether it'sin their teen years growing up
because they're frustrated withthe way that they're, being
treated or parented.
They will say or realize, youknow what?
My parents did this right, but Ithink I'll do this differently
than my parents.
Like I even have friends whowere raised by military parents
(16:01):
and that Can be different.
The way that they're disciplinedor raised to do chores can be
different and they may go withthat and think that was a good
thing for me, or they may saythat was a little too much.
In my family I will do itdifferently.
So I think it does really affecthow you parent and then there's
moments where, we justinstinctively do some things
because that's the way we wereraised.
(16:23):
And whether we really agree thatthat's really great.
Sometimes we just do that thingand we don't stop and think
about should we do the this,this way?
Lennon (16:32):
And it's the case for our marriage and a lot of
marriages that sometimes thoseinstinctive reactions in
parenthood can horrify orfrustrate the other one that
does just does not see thingsthe same way.
And this is really.
Where we wanna make a turn withwhat we're talking about here,
because it's so important forparents to come to a place
(16:54):
where, uh, philosophically interms of discipline, whatever,
where they're on the same page.
And if you can't parent on thesame page, what will happen is
you end up in conflict, right?
Going behind the scenes, undoingwhat the other one has done.
All sorts of unhealthy behaviorsthat can really cause tension
between a husband and a wife.
Christal (17:14):
Yeah, it's really so important that we're unified.
Kids do need to see theirparents as a team and not that
we're competitors.
I think once we show a frontthat's not united, it shows our
weakness.
Lennon (17:27):
Yeah.
That lesson was something youlearned growing up in your
house.
Christal (17:30):
I did.
I remember even a specific timewhere I, I had some kind of
disagreement with my mother andI don't remember what it was,
but I was very frustrated and Iremember going to my dad saying,
dad, mom thinks this way.
I think this way.
What do you think?
And my dad was really clear withme, and I didn't expect this,
(17:51):
but he was like, Christal.
Your mom is my wife, and me andyour mom will always be on the
same page about things.
So you can't come to me to tryto get me on a side.
I will always side with your momand you know, teen years, you
know, who knows what it wasabout.
But I remember that to this dayIt, it opened my eyes to what
(18:12):
husband and wife was reallyabout and how they really were
about unity.
'cause they were always gonna betogether.
Us kids, we will always have ourparents who always have our
family, but we're not gonna livethere forever.
We're gonna one day move out,but them two will always be.
Together.
Lennon (18:28):
Yeah.
And you cannot present a unitedfront as parents if you're not
united.
Mm-hmm.
Which means somehow, some waybefore moments of intense
parenting, uh, you as a coupleneed to discuss what is
important in your home.
What are your values for yourkids?
This will require someconversations when the kids
(18:51):
aren't around.
Yeah.
Here's the thing.
Both parents always want what isbest for their kids.
Mm-hmm.
That sometimes they just definethe best differently.
And so in conversation, you'vereally gotta come on, okay, what
is the best?
What are we shooting for?
And most importantly, in anyhome, and most importantly in
the hearts of any parents, whatwe feel is the best for our kids
(19:15):
need to be what we believe isGod's best for our kids.
We have to want for our kidswhat we believe God wants.
Christal (19:23):
That's very true.
And I will say, just respondingto what you're saying about
discussing things and being onthe same page, I feel like this
has happened even more now thatthe kids are growing up.
And so there's so many timesthat.
A kid has asked me a question,mom, can I go do this?
But this is not a me alone kindof decision.
(19:44):
This is something you and I haveto talk about So many times have
I said, you know what?
I need to talk to your dad.
Me and your dad need to discussthis before we can give you an
answer.
And I have noticed kids aresmart.
They tend to go to the parentthat they think will give them
the answer they want.
Lennon (20:00):
Oh yeah.
Christal (20:00):
It's okay for parents to say, you know what, me and
your dad need to figure thatout, or you, me and your mom
need to talk about this before Ican give you an answer.
Lennon (20:09):
So I think it would just be a basic encouragement that
at, there have to be pointswhere you and a husband and
wife.
Step out of the parenting for amoment, and that can be stepping
out onto the porch or talking inthe room at night, but
discussing what's important andhow you're going to approach it
together.
Praying through, Lord, how do weface what it is that we're
(20:29):
facing right now?
Um, it's important for parentsto be on the same page with what
discipline.
Looks like I've seen this almostfracture marriages where one kid
grew up in a home with a certainkind of discipline.
Another kid grew up in a homewith an entirely different kind.
However, you're going todiscipline your kids.
(20:50):
You must be agreed that is moreimportant than anything else in
your marriage that, well.
Anything else concerning yourrelationship with your kids that
you were agreed on how to.
Approach the important subjects?
Christal (21:03):
Yeah.
I think this goes back to theway we're raised.
We were all disciplined a littledifferently.
There were some things that Iwas surprised talking to you
about that you were able to dothat I was not able to do.
You know, like Yeah.
Watching horror movies when youwere, how old were you?
Lennon (21:18):
Oh gosh.
Christal (21:19):
Your parents let you do ten
Lennon (21:21):
eight.
Right.
I remember being dropped off tosee the New Nightmare on Elm
Street.
I mean, I'm like nine years oldor something like that in the
theater by myself watchingNightmare on Elm Street.
Christal (21:32):
Yeah.
Yeah.
Lennon (21:33):
I would never do it
Christal (21:34):
right.
And there's some things myparents would be okay with that
Yours wouldn't be.
I just think that's what'sinteresting is that there may be
things that I might be harder onthan you are, or that are more
important to me than, than it isto you, or vice versa, we're all
gonna have our tendencies in howwe discipline.
Some of us have been affected, Ithink, by certain styles of
discipline that we're just like,I'm not gonna do that to my
(21:54):
kids.
You know?
And I think that's where youjust need to have a conversation
together about what you feel isreally godly and Right.
And I think like what you saidearlier, going back to the
scripture, going back to how Godwould want things, we need to go
to that first.
The Bible and having wisdom fromcouples.
Who have been there and donethat, we can see from the
(22:16):
outside that they have a veryhealthy family.
Their kids are doing well.
It's just those are the peoplewe need to go to and say, what
did you do during this phase?
Lennon (22:26):
That's a great point, and I feel like that's almost
the best parenting advice wewould give anybody.
Is have other people in yourlife who have successfully
raised kids who are functioningadults and who love the Lord.
Mm-hmm.
And now it's definitely the casethat great parents can have
their children go off the rails.
It doesn't matter how good aparent you are, you cannot
(22:47):
guarantee that you kid isn'tgonna sin.
Mm-hmm.
Sinners are gonna sin andthey're gonna make bad choices.
But you also don't want to takeadvice from anybody who will
give it, and so you want to askpeople who seem to love the
Lord, who love their kids, whosekids love them because you are
(23:09):
after Jesus said this aboutwisdom, he said Wisdom is proven
by her children.
Christal (23:14):
Mm-hmm.
Lennon (23:15):
Meaning that wisdom always shows up over time.
And in the end with maturity,it's the same for approaches to
marriage and parenting.
So that's a big deal.
Yeah.
I'm glad you brought it up.
Christal (23:26):
Yeah.
So find, find people that you,you look up to and admire the
way that they parent and you cantell, that they're doing a good
job with it.
I know we've had those phases,we've gone to friends in the
toddler stage.
I went to my parents a lot aboutthis too.
I remember asking my dad onceabout one of our kids that was
(23:46):
having a really intense, two,3-year-old stage you know?
um, I remember asking thequestions, what do I do with
this?
I don't know what to do in thissituation.
I feel like I don't know how to,how to discipline them well or
something.
And I remember asking my dadthis question, he told me, well,
you just stay consistent.
Stay consistent with them.
(24:07):
The stronger will kids need toknow this is my yes, and this is
my no.
Yeah.
And I'm staying consistent.
And then he even told me, youknow, but you wanna be careful
with a strong-willed kid not tobreak their will.
You don't want to, to be sooverbearing, where it hurts them
because there's a gift in thatbeing strong-willed as well.
And that was just parentingadvice that was so important and
(24:28):
help me in the future.
With what to do in certainsituations.
So go, go find those people.
Lennon (24:34):
Absolutely.
So I feel like we've had threeprimary encouragement in this
episode.
Then as we begin to wrap up,we've talked about the
importance of being on the samepage with each other, talking to
each other, not just talking toyour kids.
We talked about talking to God.
About your kids and about yourhousehold.
And then we talked about talkingto others who have raised kids
(24:57):
who love them, who they love,who love the Lord.
Those are three pretty goodencouragement that wherever you
are friends in your parentingjourney, whether you're trying
to get your first one to sleep,you're trying to get your first
one out the door, you're gonnaneed those three things.
Christal (25:13):
Hey, can you tell, what we learned at a parenting
conference once with Dr.
Ken Wilkis and how he wastalking about the sailing as a
parent,
Lennon (25:22):
yeah.
I'm gonna, I'm gonna botch it alittle bit, but Dr.
Ken Wilkis, who will be on ourpodcast very soon, he's been a
very important influence in ourparenthood journey.
Listen, this is a guy who peoplewould consider a parenting
expert, but one of theencouragement that he always
gives is like, this isn'tscience right?
There's, there's no one perfectway.
(25:44):
To do this, there are principlesthat are godly.
There are general directions,but you're gonna have to figure
out some things on your feet andyou're gonna feel confused
sometimes.
And that's okay.
And I think he made thestatement that it's more sailing
than science.
Christal (26:00):
Mm.
Lennon (26:00):
Sometimes you're responding to the wind and you
don't have a black and whiteplay by play for exactly what
you're doing.
But if you keep your generaldestination there, respond to
the wind, work with what you'regetting, you're gonna get there
in the end.
And that's really.
I mean, goodness, if you're aparent listening to a podcast on
(26:22):
parenting, you're probably doingbetter than you think.
Christal (26:25):
Yeah,
Lennon (26:25):
and that's an important thing.
Christal (26:27):
Yeah.
I love that because I know forus as parents, we have
definitely come to some lightbulb moments of, Hmm, maybe that
wasn't the best way to parentthat situation.
And we find out after the fact.
'cause we're just trying to doour best in the situation.
But I think that's where God'sgrace comes in and he really
does help us.
(26:48):
We are just not gonna parentevery situation perfectly.
Right.
We're not gonna do that.
But if we're staying together inour hearts unified as husband
and wife, I think we can goforward with Lord, forgive me
for not parenting thatsituation.
Right?
But I wanna continue to do whatyou would want us to do.
And I really do think that.
(27:09):
Keeping unified as a husband andwife is so, so important.
And then knowing that God isgoing to help you with your
mistakes that you made in thepast, and he's gonna help you
grow in your wisdom and learnfrom those mistakes as well.
Lennon (27:26):
That's a perfect wrap up.
So friends, don't forget tofollow or subscribe so that you
never miss an episode.
We drop new ones every Tuesday,and if today's conversation
encouraged you, it'd mean a lotto us.
If you would add a review to thepodcast to help other people
find it, go to home andmarriage.com for more resources.
We have a great course therecalled Six Habits of Happy
Couples, and throughout the weekfor more content, you can follow
(27:49):
us along on Instagram, Facebook,or TikTok.
All those links are in the shownotes.
Christal (27:54):
Thank you so much for joining us today on the Home and
Marriage Podcast.
We really do believe that homecan be your favorite place.
We'll be back again next weekwith more encouragement and
wisdom to help you become betterat home and stronger together.
And if you can't parent on the same page, what will
happen is you end up inconflict, right?
Going behind the scenes, undoingwhat the other one has done.
All sorts of unhealthy behaviorsthat can really cause tension
between a husband and a wife.
Christal (00:16):
Yeah, it's really so important that we're unified.
Kids do need to see theirparents as a team and not
competitors.
Lennon (00:27):
This is the Home and Marriage Podcast with Lennon and
Christal Noland, where we helpcouples become better at home
and stronger Together, we arehusband and wife, parents and
ministers who want God's bestfor our home and yours.
Hey friends, welcome back to theshow.
So glad that you're here with ustoday and, as we are recording,
and actually whenever you arelistening, the weekend is coming
(00:50):
and this is a week where I'mglad it is, uh, both because
it's been a busy week, but alsowe got some good stuff coming
up.
Christal (00:56):
Yeah, I live for the weekends, Lennon.
I do.
And it's when,
Lennon (01:00):
it's when you, it's when you get turned as the kids say.
Oh, what does that mean?
Christal (01:05):
What does that even mean?
It's, it's
Lennon (01:07):
not good.
This is a joke.
I'm, I'm making a joke.
Oh, that's on the, the old Homeand Marriage podcast.
I thought
Christal (01:11):
that was Yeah, that's something we probably couldn't
put on this We to mark.
Well,
Lennon (01:14):
it's so we, it's something we wouldn't do.
First of, are
Christal (01:16):
we gonna have to mark, uh, explicit now on our podcast?
Maybe
Lennon (01:19):
so.
Oh no.
We'd probably have to markcringe because that's what our
kids would do if they heardtheir dad use the word turnt.
Yeah.
I
Christal (01:26):
don't even know what that word means.
I don't even wanna know whatthat word means.
But anyways, I think
Lennon (01:29):
it meant, and first of all, it meant something like
four years ago.
And it that it probably doesn't,it's probably not a word that's
actually used anymore.
Let's just move on from this.
What are we looking forward tofor this weekend?
Christal (01:41):
Well, I will say there's been many times that
we've said words that we thoughtwere fine back in our day, back
in the nineties, early twothousands that we used, and our
kids have informed us that thatword means something else.
And so we're like, oh, no.
Well,
Lennon (01:55):
they've done that when we've tried to bandwagon on a
word that it seems like theywere using five minutes ago.
Christal (02:00):
I know you can't keep up with these kids.
Lennon (02:02):
No one does that anymore.
No one says that,
Christal (02:04):
bro.
Bro.
I do know.
They say, bro.
And as I learned from JimmyFallon, they say a hundred
percent.
A hundred percent.
Lennon (02:11):
Yeah.
Jimmy Fallon, he's, he's theguide of all of all parenting
lingo.
Christal (02:14):
Anyways, all right, let's move on.
Yes.
Okay.
So this weekend, uh, one thingI'm looking forward to,
definitely looking forward todate night tonight we have that.
Lennon (02:22):
We do,
Christal (02:23):
Saturday night we already have a plan to watch
Lord of the Rings.
And we are big Lord of the Ringsnerds here at our, well.
I won't speak for our kids.
Some of them love it more thanothers, but for me and you, we
love Lord of the Rings, don'twe?
Lennon (02:37):
We do love some Tolkien and they did such a good job
with those movies.
And there's something about theholiday season.
We're here at the end of Octoberheading into the good stuff that
always sparks this feeling likeit's time to enjoy a few
classics.
And so yeah, we got Lord of theRings coming, but we're not just
gonna watch.
A Lord of the Rings movie, youalso have a good plan for us to
(02:59):
eat some Lord of the Ringsappropriate food.
Christal (03:02):
Yeah, I, I'm doing basic Lord of the Rings food,
but I am making a roast.
That night, you know, roast withpotatoes and carrots
Lennon (03:10):
as carrots as Sam Wise would say.
Potatoes.
Christal (03:13):
Potatoes.
And then we will have some kindof like dessert.
It's not really Lord of theRings theme, but we will have a
dessert.
But, yeah, I, I thought aboutgoing all out, like I got on
Pinterest and started looking atall the cool recipes for Lord of
the Rings nights, but they wereintense.
Like you can make.
Lumps.
Lius limbus.
Limbus bread.
(03:34):
Yeah.
Which is like the Elvin bread.
You can make that yourself andwrap it in like leaves and make
it look like elf bread.
And so I thought about that fora moment, but I was like, that's
gonna take too much time forthat.
I dunno if I had the time to doall that.
Lennon (03:47):
Well, that's okay.
That's the thing.
That's a preview of holidaypressures in general, right?
Oh, lots of things are cute, butto try to do all the cute things
just kind of takes the joy outof everything and makes it way
too much work to even have fun.
Christal (04:01):
Hey, and I know we're gonna have an episode coming up
pretty soon about the holidays.
We will, we're gonna talk aboutthe, the pressures of the
holidays, how to get throughyour holidays with peace,
hopefully, so that's common.
That will be good.
That's gonna be a fun episode.
Lennon (04:14):
It will be.
So we're gonna talk aboutparenting today and specifically
kind of the different thingsthat a husband and wife, that a
mom and dad.
Bring to the table.
And it's not just specificbetween a mom and dad, sometimes
just two parents aspersonalities and the
experiences we've had growingup, we can just parent
(04:35):
differently.
And this can either be a sourceof strength or it can be a
source of frustration.
And probably over time it'sgonna, we're gonna experience
both at some point.
Right,
Christal (04:45):
exactly.
Because we are two differentpeople raised in different homes
and I think.
First of all, just marriage ingeneral.
You deal with a lot of thingsbecause you are so different,
right?
Men and women are different.
We know that's just a fact.
And then you and I, just out ofour own experience, we know
we're different people.
We think at the beginning, likewe said last week, we think
(05:07):
we're so the same.
And then you get married andrealize you're not exactly the
same and you're you.
You handle situations verydifferently.
And I think in parenting itreally comes to light.
We start to see that.
We are just very different.
And the way we see thissituation is different too.
And that, I think that plays injust as, like I'm saying, person
(05:30):
to person, but also men andwomen, mothers and fathers are
very different.
Right.
Lennon (05:35):
Yeah.
And that's, and that's animportant thing to recognize and
it's also an important thing toappreciate.
Christal (05:41):
Yeah.
Lennon (05:41):
So why don't we lean into that just for a second,
that moms and dads themselves.
Are different.
Mm-hmm.
God designed us to bring uniquestrengths and to need each other
in specific ways.
And so what's one of thedifferences you think that
really come to light with how amom and how a dad approached
parenting?
Christal (06:02):
I say the first things that come to mind about dads and
mom's tendencies are dads tendto be really good at encouraging
and pushing a kid into what theyneed to learn or grow into, or,
they really believe, Hey, let's.
Let's let'em do this thing.
Right.
And the moms tend to be way morenurturing and comforting and, oh
(06:24):
wait, maybe they're not readyfor that thing yet, so let's
just hold on to'em a littlelonger.
You know, we tend to be thatway.
Yesss what comes to my mindfirst?
Lennon (06:32):
That's a pretty common one.
And all of these things show upin the other parent at times,
but these are kind of broadthemes.
Yeah.
And you are right that as a dadI am.
Sometimes from a much too earlyage, I'm like, no, they're ready
for this.
They can, they can do this, andthey're, they're gonna be fine.
Tough it out.
And that mom does want to leanin and encourage.
Christal (06:54):
Yeah.
I remember when our kids firststarted learning to ride bikes.
Yeah.
So we have, three kids that arevery close in age.
The first two only have twoyears between them, and then the
last two have seven monthsbecause our youngest is adopted.
So we have this almost likeIrish twins that, that we
raised, yeah.
In the home anyways.
(07:16):
I remember the day Addie hadalready been riding her bike.
She's older, and then Ethan waslearning to ride his bike with
the neighborhood kids.
First of all.
I didn't even know this wasgoing on outside, that they were
learning to ride bikes.
Yeah.
And this,
Lennon (07:28):
this was the big remove the training wheels day.
Christal (07:31):
Oh yeah.
Yeah.
And so I remember being reallynervous and, and them saying,
oh, look, Ethan can ride a bike.
And we go out there and he'slearning how to maneuver that
bike, you know, and I feltnervous.
I was always scared.
They're gonna, they're gonnahurt themselves,
Lennon (07:45):
like he'll be fine.
Rub some dirt on it, he'll befine.
Christal (07:48):
And then Lizzie the same day.
I wanna learn too.
My natural tendency was say,let's just wait a little longer
for you to learn.
I think I can only handle onekid at a time as they're
learning to ride their bike.
But you would be very differentin that situation.
Lennon (08:03):
Yeah, I, I remember.
So specifically hearing ouroldest say, dad, look at Lizzie
and, and her and another one ofthe neighborhood kids were kinda
walking alongside her, pushingher on the bike, and then they
just all forehand.
Came off the bike and there wasLizzie wobbling and riding down
the driveway.
And I mean, goodness, that'sjust a picture of a million
(08:26):
things that come up as our kidsdo get older.
And you're right, dads dodefault into kind of you can,
you can do this.
Go for it.
Toughen up.
And moms have kind of anurturing and comforting heart
for sure.
Christal (08:40):
They do.
Another thing that this makes methink of is how, With moms being
more nurturing and comforting.
Moms understand daughters betterbecause they're a woman.
Right?
There's just things that youunderstand about your daughter
that dads may not get, and itmay be harder for moms to even
understand things about theirsons that the dads are gonna
know.
(09:00):
Yeah.
And understand.
So I, that's, that's really a, agreat thing to have, and we'll
talk a little bit more aboutthat later.
But one story that comes to mymind too, personally, I remember
when I was about 13.
And you know what happens around13 for girls?
Yes.
So I remember being very justemotional.
And one night we were sitting atthe dinner table, and I cannot
(09:23):
tell you why I was crying, but Istarted to cry over something
that happened and I was justeating my dinner crying and my
dad being the loving dad, hewouldn't know how to fix it.
Right.
But he could not figure, and Icouldn't tell him.
What was wrong?
He couldn't figure it out.
And I was just crying.
And I remember him saying,there's nothing to cry about
what's going on?
(09:43):
I mean, why are you crying?
And my mom jumping in in thatmoment of just like, honey,
she's just going through somethings right now as a woman.
And I remember leaving the tableand going to my room, like
crying, and my mom comes backthere and she's like.
Listen, this is part of, this isa part of the changes that
you're going through help,helping me understand, but then
(10:05):
helping my dad understand.
Yes.
So
Lennon (10:08):
that's such a, a key thing of moms helping dads
understand and dads helping momsunderstand.
With sons, there is someexpertise we have with our.
Our gender because we've beenthere and done that.
And I know so many singleparents have to bear the burden
of raising their kids bythemselves and have to look for
(10:28):
ways to, uh, supplement thestrengths that they bring to the
table.
But we should never take forgranted having one another.
Like, I need you.
To help me understand theseyoung women that we have in our
house right now.
And you need me to help youunderstand our son.
Christal (10:45):
That's right.
And this makes me also think ofanother phase that we have not
gotten to yet, but we areapproaching and I think that's
the whole kids, you know,leaving the home, leaving the
nest, and the way that we handlethat, and I will just say.
Already preparing for that.
Mentally, I'm, I get way moreemotional.
(11:05):
You get emotional.
I know you do, but I like crymore often about thinking of our
oldest one leaving to college.
Um, I post, um, a senior Sundaypicture most every Sunday
because it helps me like startto mourn that loss.
Yeah.
You know, that's the way I'mhandling it, but I have a
(11:25):
feeling.
You, I will be crying a lot moreoften, more days, not because I
love my daughter more, It'sbecause I, I handle it.
It's harder for me letting goand I think you're really good.
And dads tend to be really goodat preparing them and pushing
them out into the world as well.
Not that moms can't, because Iknow there are moments that.
(11:47):
I rise up and say, Nope, you'regonna do this because you need
to learn the real world.
Lennon (11:52):
Right, right.
So moms and dads do havedifferences, but we don't just
bring to the table of parenting,our gender roles, per se.
We also bring to the table whowe have grown up to become, and
sometimes our backgrounds thetype of household we grew up in.
The, the clinical term is right.
Our family of origin and allthat entails also affects how we
(12:17):
think about parenting, whetherit's stuff we want to emulate or
it's things that weinstinctively run from, and so
that can have a big effect Onthe tone of a home, what kind of
home did the parents grow up in?
Did you know athomeandmarriage.com you can get
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(12:37):
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(12:59):
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So for me, as far as something Ithink about in our home, I came
up from a home that was touchedby divorce.
So I I had a stepmother, forpart of my life.
I had a stepfather as well.
All of those things introducedinteresting dynamics and so,
(14:07):
You, on the other hand, camefrom an intact family.
You grew up with mom and dad,married, they're still married.
You had a brother and then areally young brother in the
household.
We had two pretty differentexperiences growing up.
Christal (14:21):
We did, and I think about that, not only just having
The situation, having marriedparents still together versus
divorced and the kind of stuffyou go through, with both of
those situations, for me, we hadresponsibilities at the house,
like we did chores for sure.
But I know for you, you had likea crazy chore situation versus
(14:45):
the way I had it.
Lennon (14:47):
My stepmother, who has passed away now, but she was
really a drill sergeant of thehousehold.
She was gonna have no kids justlaying around and sleeping in.
I had a Saturday.
Chore schedule,
Christal (14:59):
right?
That
Lennon (14:59):
would take my friend's breath away.
They could not believe, and notjust Saturdays, but a lot of
times in the house as well.
And so for us parenting that'sreally shaped me and what I
expect that our kids can, can doand how they can contribute
around the household.
And maybe sometimes I can get alittle bit extreme and you have
(15:20):
to reign me in on some things,but that's something that we
have to realize that withwhatever background we've both
come out of.
It's not necessarily the casethat everything we learned was
ideal.
Mm-hmm.
And just because our spouse wentthrough something different,
they don't have any values tobring to the table.
That might be beneficial aswell.
Even if they're different thanours.
Christal (15:41):
Yeah.
I think no matter what, everyperson.
comes to a place, whether it'sin their teen years growing up
because they're frustrated withthe way that they're, being
treated or parented.
They will say or realize, youknow what?
My parents did this right, but Ithink I'll do this differently
than my parents.
Like I even have friends whowere raised by military parents
(16:01):
and that Can be different.
The way that they're disciplinedor raised to do chores can be
different and they may go withthat and think that was a good
thing for me, or they may saythat was a little too much.
In my family I will do itdifferently.
So I think it does really affecthow you parent and then there's
moments where, we justinstinctively do some things
because that's the way we wereraised.
(16:23):
And whether we really agree thatthat's really great.
Sometimes we just do that thingand we don't stop and think
about should we do the this,this way?
Lennon (16:32):
And it's the case for our marriage and a lot of
marriages that sometimes thoseinstinctive reactions in
parenthood can horrify orfrustrate the other one that
does just does not see thingsthe same way.
And this is really.
Where we wanna make a turn withwhat we're talking about here,
because it's so important forparents to come to a place
(16:54):
where, uh, philosophically interms of discipline, whatever,
where they're on the same page.
And if you can't parent on thesame page, what will happen is
you end up in conflict, right?
Going behind the scenes, undoingwhat the other one has done.
All sorts of unhealthy behaviorsthat can really cause tension
between a husband and a wife.
Christal (17:14):
Yeah, it's really so important that we're unified.
Kids do need to see theirparents as a team and not that
we're competitors.
I think once we show a frontthat's not united, it shows our
weakness.
Lennon (17:27):
Yeah.
That lesson was something youlearned growing up in your
house.
Christal (17:30):
I did.
I remember even a specific timewhere I, I had some kind of
disagreement with my mother andI don't remember what it was,
but I was very frustrated and Iremember going to my dad saying,
dad, mom thinks this way.
I think this way.
What do you think?
And my dad was really clear withme, and I didn't expect this,
(17:51):
but he was like, Christal.
Your mom is my wife, and me andyour mom will always be on the
same page about things.
So you can't come to me to tryto get me on a side.
I will always side with your momand you know, teen years, you
know, who knows what it wasabout.
But I remember that to this dayIt, it opened my eyes to what
(18:12):
husband and wife was reallyabout and how they really were
about unity.
'cause they were always gonna betogether.
Us kids, we will always have ourparents who always have our
family, but we're not gonna livethere forever.
We're gonna one day move out,but them two will always be.
Together.
Lennon (18:28):
Yeah.
And you cannot present a unitedfront as parents if you're not
united.
Mm-hmm.
Which means somehow, some waybefore moments of intense
parenting, uh, you as a coupleneed to discuss what is
important in your home.
What are your values for yourkids?
This will require someconversations when the kids
(18:51):
aren't around.
Yeah.
Here's the thing.
Both parents always want what isbest for their kids.
Mm-hmm.
That sometimes they just definethe best differently.
And so in conversation, you'vereally gotta come on, okay, what
is the best?
What are we shooting for?
And most importantly, in anyhome, and most importantly in
the hearts of any parents, whatwe feel is the best for our kids
(19:15):
need to be what we believe isGod's best for our kids.
We have to want for our kidswhat we believe God wants.
Christal (19:23):
That's very true.
And I will say, just respondingto what you're saying about
discussing things and being onthe same page, I feel like this
has happened even more now thatthe kids are growing up.
And so there's so many timesthat.
A kid has asked me a question,mom, can I go do this?
But this is not a me alone kindof decision.
(19:44):
This is something you and I haveto talk about So many times have
I said, you know what?
I need to talk to your dad.
Me and your dad need to discussthis before we can give you an
answer.
And I have noticed kids aresmart.
They tend to go to the parentthat they think will give them
the answer they want.
Lennon (20:00):
Oh yeah.
Christal (20:00):
It's okay for parents to say, you know what, me and
your dad need to figure thatout, or you, me and your mom
need to talk about this before Ican give you an answer.
Lennon (20:09):
So I think it would just be a basic encouragement that
at, there have to be pointswhere you and a husband and
wife.
Step out of the parenting for amoment, and that can be stepping
out onto the porch or talking inthe room at night, but
discussing what's important andhow you're going to approach it
together.
Praying through, Lord, how do weface what it is that we're
(20:29):
facing right now?
Um, it's important for parentsto be on the same page with what
discipline.
Looks like I've seen this almostfracture marriages where one kid
grew up in a home with a certainkind of discipline.
Another kid grew up in a homewith an entirely different kind.
However, you're going todiscipline your kids.
(20:50):
You must be agreed that is moreimportant than anything else in
your marriage that, well.
Anything else concerning yourrelationship with your kids that
you were agreed on how to.
Approach the important subjects?
Christal (21:03):
Yeah.
I think this goes back to theway we're raised.
We were all disciplined a littledifferently.
There were some things that Iwas surprised talking to you
about that you were able to dothat I was not able to do.
You know, like Yeah.
Watching horror movies when youwere, how old were you?
Lennon (21:18):
Oh gosh.
Christal (21:19):
Your parents let you do ten
Lennon (21:21):
eight.
Right.
I remember being dropped off tosee the New Nightmare on Elm
Street.
I mean, I'm like nine years oldor something like that in the
theater by myself watchingNightmare on Elm Street.
Christal (21:32):
Yeah.
Yeah.
Lennon (21:33):
I would never do it
Christal (21:34):
right.
And there's some things myparents would be okay with that
Yours wouldn't be.
I just think that's what'sinteresting is that there may be
things that I might be harder onthan you are, or that are more
important to me than, than it isto you, or vice versa, we're all
gonna have our tendencies in howwe discipline.
Some of us have been affected, Ithink, by certain styles of
discipline that we're just like,I'm not gonna do that to my
(21:54):
kids.
You know?
And I think that's where youjust need to have a conversation
together about what you feel isreally godly and Right.
And I think like what you saidearlier, going back to the
scripture, going back to how Godwould want things, we need to go
to that first.
The Bible and having wisdom fromcouples.
Who have been there and donethat, we can see from the
(22:16):
outside that they have a veryhealthy family.
Their kids are doing well.
It's just those are the peoplewe need to go to and say, what
did you do during this phase?
Lennon (22:26):
That's a great point, and I feel like that's almost
the best parenting advice wewould give anybody.
Is have other people in yourlife who have successfully
raised kids who are functioningadults and who love the Lord.
Mm-hmm.
And now it's definitely the casethat great parents can have
their children go off the rails.
It doesn't matter how good aparent you are, you cannot
(22:47):
guarantee that you kid isn'tgonna sin.
Mm-hmm.
Sinners are gonna sin andthey're gonna make bad choices.
But you also don't want to takeadvice from anybody who will
give it, and so you want to askpeople who seem to love the
Lord, who love their kids, whosekids love them because you are
(23:09):
after Jesus said this aboutwisdom, he said Wisdom is proven
by her children.
Christal (23:14):
Mm-hmm.
Lennon (23:15):
Meaning that wisdom always shows up over time.
And in the end with maturity,it's the same for approaches to
marriage and parenting.
So that's a big deal.
Yeah.
I'm glad you brought it up.
Christal (23:26):
Yeah.
So find, find people that you,you look up to and admire the
way that they parent and you cantell, that they're doing a good
job with it.
I know we've had those phases,we've gone to friends in the
toddler stage.
I went to my parents a lot aboutthis too.
I remember asking my dad onceabout one of our kids that was
(23:46):
having a really intense, two,3-year-old stage you know?
um, I remember asking thequestions, what do I do with
this?
I don't know what to do in thissituation.
I feel like I don't know how to,how to discipline them well or
something.
And I remember asking my dadthis question, he told me, well,
you just stay consistent.
Stay consistent with them.
(24:07):
The stronger will kids need toknow this is my yes, and this is
my no.
Yeah.
And I'm staying consistent.
And then he even told me, youknow, but you wanna be careful
with a strong-willed kid not tobreak their will.
You don't want to, to be sooverbearing, where it hurts them
because there's a gift in thatbeing strong-willed as well.
And that was just parentingadvice that was so important and
(24:28):
help me in the future.
With what to do in certainsituations.
So go, go find those people.
Lennon (24:34):
Absolutely.
So I feel like we've had threeprimary encouragement in this
episode.
Then as we begin to wrap up,we've talked about the
importance of being on the samepage with each other, talking to
each other, not just talking toyour kids.
We talked about talking to God.
About your kids and about yourhousehold.
And then we talked about talkingto others who have raised kids
(24:57):
who love them, who they love,who love the Lord.
Those are three pretty goodencouragement that wherever you
are friends in your parentingjourney, whether you're trying
to get your first one to sleep,you're trying to get your first
one out the door, you're gonnaneed those three things.
Christal (25:13):
Hey, can you tell, what we learned at a parenting
conference once with Dr.
Ken Wilkis and how he wastalking about the sailing as a
parent,
Lennon (25:22):
yeah.
I'm gonna, I'm gonna botch it alittle bit, but Dr.
Ken Wilkis, who will be on ourpodcast very soon, he's been a
very important influence in ourparenthood journey.
Listen, this is a guy who peoplewould consider a parenting
expert, but one of theencouragement that he always
gives is like, this isn'tscience right?
There's, there's no one perfectway.
(25:44):
To do this, there are principlesthat are godly.
There are general directions,but you're gonna have to figure
out some things on your feet andyou're gonna feel confused
sometimes.
And that's okay.
And I think he made thestatement that it's more sailing
than science.
Christal (26:00):
Mm.
Lennon (26:00):
Sometimes you're responding to the wind and you
don't have a black and whiteplay by play for exactly what
you're doing.
But if you keep your generaldestination there, respond to
the wind, work with what you'regetting, you're gonna get there
in the end.
And that's really.
I mean, goodness, if you're aparent listening to a podcast on
(26:22):
parenting, you're probably doingbetter than you think.
Christal (26:25):
Yeah,
Lennon (26:25):
and that's an important thing.
Christal (26:27):
Yeah.
I love that because I know forus as parents, we have
definitely come to some lightbulb moments of, Hmm, maybe that
wasn't the best way to parentthat situation.
And we find out after the fact.
'cause we're just trying to doour best in the situation.
But I think that's where God'sgrace comes in and he really
does help us.
(26:48):
We are just not gonna parentevery situation perfectly.
Right.
We're not gonna do that.
But if we're staying together inour hearts unified as husband
and wife, I think we can goforward with Lord, forgive me
for not parenting thatsituation.
Right?
But I wanna continue to do whatyou would want us to do.
And I really do think that.
(27:09):
Keeping unified as a husband andwife is so, so important.
And then knowing that God isgoing to help you with your
mistakes that you made in thepast, and he's gonna help you
grow in your wisdom and learnfrom those mistakes as well.
Lennon (27:26):
That's a perfect wrap up.
So friends, don't forget tofollow or subscribe so that you
never miss an episode.
We drop new ones every Tuesday,and if today's conversation
encouraged you, it'd mean a lotto us.
If you would add a review to thepodcast to help other people
find it, go to home andmarriage.com for more resources.
We have a great course therecalled Six Habits of Happy
Couples, and throughout the weekfor more content, you can follow
(27:49):
us along on Instagram, Facebook,or TikTok.
All those links are in the shownotes.
Christal (27:54):
Thank you so much for joining us today on the Home and
Marriage Podcast.
We really do believe that homecan be your favorite place.
We'll be back again next weekwith more encouragement and
wisdom to help you become betterat home and stronger together.
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