Episode 5: Holding Space, Not Holding f*cking Everything!

When we first start setting boundaries, it doesn’t feel good—it feels hard. It feels like guilt. Like fear. Like disappointing people you love. But that discomfort? It’s not a red flag. It’s a sign that you’re growing.

In this episode of Home To Me, Steph shares her own messy, funny, deeply human journey through learning to say no, choosing herself (on purpose), and why the first few steps toward change feel super uncomfortable. 

We talk about cultural messaging around sacrifice, and the tender truth that loving people doesn't mean saving them from their own growth. And if you’ve ever resented making tea for five people when all you wanted was one cup? You’re in the right place.

This one’s for the people-pleasers, the overfunctioners, and the big-hearted humans who are ready to stop rescuing and start relating. Because boundaries aren’t walls—they’re a radical act of trust in yourself and the people you love.

Show Notes

In this episode, Steph explores:

• The childhood tea story that perfectly sums up people-pleasing

• Where we may have learned the art of ignoring our needs and wants

• What boundaries are not (hint: not walls, not ultimatums, not control tactics)

• Why boundaries benefit everyone in the relationship—not just you

• How setting boundaries builds respect, safety, and actual intimacy

• The emotional fallout of saying “no”—and why that discomfort means you're growing

• A deeply personal story of a relationship-saving boundary (thank you, husband)

• Practice scripts for real-life boundary-setting (yes, including how to skip that event you don’t want to go to)

• A whole bunch of cussing

Try This This Week:
Schedule one small thing just for you—and protect it like your job depends on it.
Practice the pause - “Let me get back to you on that.” 
Let the guilt be proof that you’re doing something new. The hard is evidence of growth.