Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
What's the name of the podcast?
Speaker 2 (00:01):
Even, Yeah, comedy's not going to be a podcast that's
going to be.
Speaker 3 (00:08):
I would say I wouldn't say that. I wouldn't say
I wouldn't so would look.
Speaker 2 (00:12):
At usc This is looking dangerously professional.
Speaker 3 (00:17):
How many episodes are we on? Yeah?
Speaker 2 (00:20):
How many episodes is this? This is one sixty something?
Speaker 3 (00:23):
See for one hundred and fifty something. You had no light?
Speaker 1 (00:29):
Slow adopters, Yeah, we're slow learners. Yeah, this is history
making podcasting.
Speaker 3 (00:34):
Imagine you guys had an episode of thousand. You might
have two.
Speaker 2 (00:37):
Lights, you might have listeners. Sary Andrew, Welcome to the pod.
Speaker 3 (00:43):
Mate, Thanks for having met on to save the show?
What's wrong with it?
Speaker 2 (00:47):
We heard your pod with Bradley and I listened to
it and I was like, holy fuck, this dude is
dropping some knowledge.
Speaker 3 (00:54):
Was I never listened to any podcasts I'm on? Yeah, right,
And I don't remember what happened because I just wanted
a normal person that doesn't let this out of my voice,
which is strange because I'm a comedian, which sucks when
you want to make content because you're like, oh, I
fucking hate it. But actually that podcast is probably the
most podcast that anyone who's ever reached out to me
being like I heard that one. Yeah, that was great
because I just thought we were going to be stupid. And
(01:15):
then they started asking me some like life questions and
I was like, oh, I just spread some what I know,
what I learned from failing right, Yeah, and everyone was like, oh,
that was really helpful. So I was quite surprised about
that because I was surprised because I didn't think anyone
listened to their podcast.
Speaker 2 (01:27):
Yeah, well apparently it did the rounds, like it went
through Melbourne open mic scene, like everyone was fucking listening
to it, just being like, holy shit, this dude knows what's.
Speaker 3 (01:36):
Up and no one told me except for you. So
that's really this is the first I hearing about it
that's come back to you.
Speaker 2 (01:41):
Yeah right, I guess because I'm at the club all
the time, I hear people chatting and talking about shit.
It was just like that came up and I was like, yeah,
I fucking listened to that one like five times.
Speaker 3 (01:50):
What was the takeaway? As I didn't listen to it,
so educate me.
Speaker 1 (01:53):
Comedy sucks and it's really hard to get a ed.
Speaker 2 (01:56):
Was comedy starts Now? It was just like that most
people that do comedy suck it the business side of it.
Speaker 3 (02:01):
The bar is so low to be good at business.
So it's unfortunate. And it's because normal most artists, regular
artists don't know how to do it. So if you
can learn, then you can automatically just get ahead of
like most of the field. And I was fortunate enough
that I identified that early because I didn't know it,
(02:23):
and so I just taught myself all of the ins
and outs of that thing, and you know, it's been
enabled me to grow and actually perform to real people. Yeah,
real people are the best to perform too, is quietly,
and so that's what the thing is.
Speaker 2 (02:38):
Yeah, just been learn someone doing it. I get the
shits so bad, and especially after listening to that pod
where you were like being like just go like put
your stuff out online and just bomb online. And I've
been doing that now, like putting clips out and it's
not done great to be honest, but like I'm fucking
doing it and learning from it and like starting to
see like, oh yeah, okay, I need to fix this.
(02:59):
In that learning how to do it. But I film
all the sets here and I send them out to
people and the amount of people that actually get back
to me and they're like, oh, can you do this
for a clip? Or the ones that will clip it
up themselves, Like a few people clip it up themselves.
I'm like sweet collub with the club that's sick, but
just the vast majority just like they never get back
because it's I don't want to burn bits.
Speaker 3 (03:19):
It's too terrifying. Burning bits is my favorite expression that
isn't real. Okay, So think about how much people have
you seen put something out there and then you remember
it forever? Yeah? No? Yeah, right, Like do you remember
all the bits you see in Medison let alone online?
Speaker 2 (03:34):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (03:34):
So I can tell you right now there's not anyone
who follows me that goes, I fucking know that bit
word by word, Like, you're not burning anything unless it's
on Netflix or like you have like a dedicated fan
base that love everything you do and can recite your
stuff back. You're not burning And also, three hundred and
forty people have seen a bit. You haven't burned anything.
Speaker 2 (03:53):
And one of the biggest comedians of all time, like
Andrew Dice Clay, used to do bits and people would
yell the bits out to him and fucking like do
this one like, and he was one of the biggest
comedians ever.
Speaker 3 (04:05):
You think the Red Old Chili Peppers are like, we're
not going to make the film clip because we don't
want to burn under the breach. Like, no, it's a
it's a thing, right, Like, you make the thing that
you're proud of, you get it to a point where
you want it to be, and then you exhibit it.
That's what it should be about.
Speaker 2 (04:19):
Us burning bits. Like the amount of people that come
into the club and they've seen you perform the same
joke multiple times, I'm more worried about that than I
am putting it out online and maybe, if I'm lucky,
one hundred thousand people will see it, it's probably going
to be more around the ten or fifteen thousand mark.
They're going to see this bit, and that's just on
(04:39):
the Internet of everywhere, Like how many percentage of people
in Newcastle are going to see that? And then how
many of them are going to go like, oh, I've
already seen this at the club. Now the actual people
that are sitting at the club that have return like
returning customers, they're the ones that are going to be like, oh,
I've heard this before. Yeah, that has nothing to do
with you putting shit out online.
Speaker 3 (04:58):
You only have so much energy per day, right, So
if you worry about how much effort you're going to put,
how much effort and thought process you put into I
don't want to do this, and I don't want to
do that, and I don't want to this. If you
just put that same effort into going, I'm going to
make this videos best as good as I can, and
then putting it out there and six months, six months
down the line, if you're worried about not doing something,
you're not going anywhere with that skill set. But if
(05:19):
you put six months worth of getting better at film making, editing,
finding all the angles and all the tricks, then six
months down the line, you're going to be that much
closer to that breakthrough.
Speaker 2 (05:28):
And a lot of.
Speaker 3 (05:29):
People do this. They don't want to bomb online, but
they're happy to go to an open mic and die
to eight people. But then they get four hundred views
and they think they failed, and it's like, well, imagine
those four hundred people are in one spot.
Speaker 2 (05:43):
You would call that a great ten times. Yeah, what
you did at the open MICU.
Speaker 3 (05:47):
But what I think the blockage is is you say,
you cut up all of these clips and like, what's
the percentage of someone putting it online to sending it out?
Do you think ten percent? Five percent?
Speaker 2 (05:56):
Yeah? Five percent, five percent, Right, So.
Speaker 3 (05:58):
I think that other ninety five send what they're worried
about is what their friends and family think. Yeah, that's
that's what their job.
Speaker 2 (06:08):
For their job, I might get fired if I put
it joke about whatever fucked it is.
Speaker 3 (06:14):
I think if you just instead of going, I think
I'm gonna wait until the joke's perfect. If you just
work on like not giving a fuck, Yeah, that is
way more pawers.
Speaker 2 (06:22):
There's obviously contents like don't just deliver dogshit and be
like I don't fucking care. But like, you know, it's
never going to be perfect.
Speaker 3 (06:30):
No, and even if it is ten years down the line,
you'll look back on that and think it's crap. Yeah,
because that's how you want to feel at all times
if you are growing as any particular skill.
Speaker 2 (06:40):
Right.
Speaker 3 (06:40):
So I always say, like, I started making content at
like five or six years into comedy, and I wish
I did it from year like maybe eighteen months in. Yeah,
So if you don't start now at some point in
the future, You're going to wish you started before, before
the present day. So just start now. That's the whole thing.
Speaker 2 (07:01):
And that's what I listened to that pod, and I
was like, fuck it, I'm starting. I'm doing it. But
we'd already been doing the poll clips for a while,
but oh my god, were they fucking awful when we started.
Speaker 4 (07:10):
I've seen something that would just yeah, the worst.
Speaker 3 (07:14):
But think about like a breakthrough, right, So I think
about this with writing, So I will write when I'm
not traveling. I'll write most days of the week, right,
And some days I sit down and nothing happens.
Speaker 2 (07:25):
But slate fishing exactly right.
Speaker 3 (07:28):
But then three sometimes three days in a row, nothing happens.
Then on the fourth day something happens. Now, if I
didn't sit down and do it, if I just sat
down when I felt like it, do I still have
to wait those three times that nothing happened. So if
I'm sitting down once a week because I think I
should do, I have to wait four weeks for a breakthrough.
But if I sit down and do it, i'd wait
four days. Yeah right, yeah, the same things with content, right,
(07:51):
So you're like, I've got this video that popped, so
I figure out on my content creating, I reckon one
in thirty goes off. Now, if I do a video
a day, I'm popping once a month. But if I
do one a week, I'm not even popping once a year. Yeah,
and it's that's just like, do your best, don't fucking
care about it too much. The moment you go, this
one's going to make me. It's not the ones that it's.
Speaker 2 (08:14):
All the same last night, it's going to be the
one that you go, I don't really know about this one,
but it's just going out. That'll be the one.
Speaker 3 (08:22):
But the best, the best skill I learned in content
creating is not care. Yeah, it's not this angle that.
It's not this video program this, it's not this YouTube
tube channel's got the greatest tips. It's go who cares
like he's part of the job, right, Just just do
your best, but don't put out crap and know what
crap is. Look at other people's stuff that's crap, and go,
I'm going to do better than that. Identify what's good
(08:43):
and crap, do good to your level, and then put
it out. Don't hope anything happens, move on to the
next one. Yeah, because sixty down the line. You're a
different creator, right, hopefully hopefully, and that's up to you.
That's three months away. I come in sixty episode, didn't
just doing the same. But you've got a light.
Speaker 1 (09:02):
Yeah, yeah, we've got a light now, thanks Tanya. It's
my wife's light.
Speaker 3 (09:09):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (09:10):
We're supposed to be for only fans. Now, it's just
gonna have to start on how we're going to see it.
But now, yeah, I've I've been fixing up my van.
That's the other thing. Oh yes, so yeah, it's nearly
getting there. That's been sweet.
Speaker 3 (09:26):
What's the what's the what's the what's the end goal
with the van?
Speaker 2 (09:29):
The chains? Chains?
Speaker 1 (09:31):
Yeah, probably catch a few time people went to the police.
Speaker 3 (09:34):
Catcheries in the back, get some kids around.
Speaker 2 (09:38):
Yeah, I just figured why not start kidding happing backpackers? Yeah,
I mean, more known for that than my comedy. You'll
pop off. I'll be popping.
Speaker 3 (09:51):
You got more chance of getting a rude as a
serial killer.
Speaker 2 (09:56):
Comedian, right, comedian with a van.
Speaker 3 (09:58):
I've been doing comedy for seven years. No one's ever
written me a letter. He killed ten backpackers all of
a sudden, I want.
Speaker 2 (10:05):
To marry you.
Speaker 1 (10:06):
Yeah, it's the only time I've ever killed. Yeah, he
went viral. Hi, Yeah, funny video mugshot is.
Speaker 3 (10:17):
The van for freedom, for creative freedom, to be able.
Speaker 2 (10:21):
To perform on the higher so that I can travel
around and do gigs. Yeah, yeah, that's the goal.
Speaker 3 (10:26):
I've been traveling around. I made these stupid that's not stupid.
It's worked out for me. But it was tough at
the time that I was like, I can stay in
Melbourne or I could like try and work the entire
Australian scene, allt ones. So so I kindly don't live anywhere,
so I just just follow follow the work. And my
thought process was behind it is like if I can
(10:47):
get it to work down the line, then it's done.
As in like I can don't have to move to
another place, figure that scene out, go to the next one.
Speaker 2 (10:54):
I'm just going to do it all at once.
Speaker 3 (10:57):
Very stressful, don't recommend it, but it's allowed me to
feel audiences out and sort of. Australia is so different
in as far as what people think it's funny.
Speaker 2 (11:09):
Yeah, for sure.
Speaker 3 (11:10):
I think Melbourne to Newcastle is probably the Melbourne to
Perth is probably.
Speaker 2 (11:13):
The biggest contrast.
Speaker 3 (11:14):
You know, places like Newcastle Perth, anywhere where there's sort
of like a big working class or manufacturing.
Speaker 2 (11:20):
So personal Newcastle traditionally yeah.
Speaker 3 (11:24):
Yeah, because I mean they're more in the sort of
mining sector, a lot of money. The demographic has swapped
of like financially right, so now people can, like especially
in Western Australia, can go and be some form of
entry level fucking laboring job, fly and fly out and
pretty good cash, right Yeah, so they have money to
(11:44):
go and spend on things like entertainment, take their misses wells.
Speaker 2 (11:47):
Rich people in Sydney and Melbourne will be on that
money and they're like, I'm not blowing it.
Speaker 1 (11:50):
On rich dun people are the best, yeah, new jet
Ski I need the best Highlarks and I'm going to
comedy and spending.
Speaker 2 (12:00):
Two hundred bucks on drinks.
Speaker 3 (12:01):
Yeah, and a bag sick Like they're just all investment
choices and I want to be in on that, yeah,
because those people are great.
Speaker 2 (12:08):
Yeah, and they want to be the bag. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (12:09):
I've put me in you know.
Speaker 2 (12:15):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (12:15):
So but to be able to I see a lot
of people who will stay in one area and they
are very good at that demographic.
Speaker 2 (12:22):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (12:23):
And then Melbourne's very similar like this they we call
them sort of inner city comedians. Yep, but if you
would have take them three hours away, they can die
as solid death.
Speaker 1 (12:33):
Oh.
Speaker 2 (12:33):
I'm the same. When I go down to Sydney, it's shit.
I'm trying to like write some different jokes at the
moment to do better there. And I've got a gig.
I've got two gigs down there in like the fifth
and sixth this month, So I'm stressing.
Speaker 3 (12:46):
Do you know what the do you know what the
cure to that is? Like, do you know, like, how
do you think you're going to overcome that? Oh?
Speaker 2 (12:51):
Just go down there and do gigs and practice and
try and new shit. That's it, and see what happens.
And it can only be the jokes that I write
and I think are funny. I'm not trying to like
pander to this Sydney audience, but I'm like, what can
I write my own shit and try that and see
if it works? Because a lot of people are like, ah,
you shouldn't like try and pander and bend out backwards people,
And I'm like, I agree, but there's the right tools
(13:12):
for the job, Like I shouldn't be using a sledgehammer
like I would in Newcastle when maybe these people require
a screwdriver or fun exactly, it's just like, yeah, I've
got this joke that's a bit fucking They might like that.
Read the room, read the crowd, like that's part of
the job. Until you get to the level that you're like,
I'm doing a theater show and it's my own fucking
crowd and I can do whatever I want. Then it's like,
well you have to fucking play the game, right.
Speaker 3 (13:35):
It's like playing the game. It's like being hurt by
the game, right and then going like if you crush
and you drive home, you think about how awesome you
are and you sleep good that night. Yeah, if you
bomb and you drive home, you think what if I'd
done this, I wish I'd done that, or if I
had my time again with this, I said that they
pulled back and I doubled down and that was a
bad call. So you're creating all your own solutions through
(13:57):
your failure. Yeah, right, and all you can do that,
the better you'll get.
Speaker 2 (14:02):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (14:03):
Yeah, that's kind of like.
Speaker 2 (14:04):
Being stubborn and just being like, no, the crowd was wrong.
Speaker 3 (14:06):
It's like, buddy, you can do that for as you
can do that, Yeah, and don't get me wrong, I've
done it.
Speaker 2 (14:13):
Yeah, we all have.
Speaker 3 (14:15):
But it doesn't do anything for you. It makes you
feel a little bit better, but like, I don't know,
what do you want to do with your better or.
Speaker 2 (14:23):
Comes around and there's that type of crowd and then
you're like, because there has been crowds in here like that,
Like occasionally you get a crowd that's a bit smarter
for whatever reason it is. They're just the people that
turned up on the night in Newcastle and you're like,
oh fuck, it's an educated crowd. They're not laughing at
the stupid shit they usually laugh at. And you're like, well, fuck,
what have I got in my bag of tricks?
Speaker 3 (14:42):
Well, through exposure and like and sucking and all that
sort of stuff, and all the things we do is
like you know, tortured artists. I'm going to like, I
want to be good at this thing, so I'm going
to go through the heartache of it. One something will
happen on stage, like six months down like you won't
ever feel any different, but something will happen six months
down the line, and your mouth will just go wibbla
ball and you'll just turn the whole thing around and
(15:03):
then people at back will go that was really good
because the energy was this, that and everything else. How
did you do that? But the real answer is, oh,
I just sucked for ages in a different environment.
Speaker 2 (15:11):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (15:12):
And it's not like it's not big fish, little pond.
It's just like fish in a fucking different pond.
Speaker 2 (15:19):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (15:19):
It's like grow the skills to be adaptable in everything.
I learned a lot of like traveling with Dave O'Neill,
the comedian. Yeah, fucking sick man. He's like thirty plus
years in. Yeah, we did five nights in a row, right,
and he was done about thirty forty minutes, and I
reckon every night. One night there was like ninety year olds.
We just did this weird town hall in the middle
(15:41):
of nowhere. No booze. They had cups of teas and
scones bro fuck yep, and like the opening acts are
like out there going we're gonna die, and we did
because also we put that in our own heads. But
we're out there like ye a new ways or what
couldn't we bet of ours? Wow?
Speaker 2 (15:56):
Like old people don't like sex jokes number one. They
hate that. They hate it.
Speaker 3 (16:01):
Yeah, and I'm like swearing and I love a little
bit of racism, just a little yeah, like you can
just walk that line of touch. And they're like, I've
got a good Chinese accent you especially out west, like
the old crowds out worst. And Dave O'Neill came in
like in the break right, didn't even see like us
(16:23):
do with the thing. Took one look at him and goes,
oh yeah, and just Rock walked out there with like
Moors jokes and like stuff, and I was like, he
killed Yeah, but.
Speaker 2 (16:36):
You're gonna say you just walked out there with a
Chinese accent? How everybody his eyes.
Speaker 3 (16:50):
And I was blown away and I was like so impressed,
and I asked him afterwards. I said, I said, I
just dude, how did you do that? And he goes, oh,
just I've just I've just bombed. He these gigs before
so figured out they're just like talking about what they
used to do. And what an insight, What a fucking
simple insight that he put into action And was like
at some stage he invented the ninety year old set. Yeah,
(17:13):
in case it happens one in six hundred times, And
he's like, I'm ready as a murder. I assume I'm
not sure what his brain works like, but I was
like that that is the most impressive thing I've seen
in comedy.
Speaker 2 (17:23):
Yeah. Well, your brain's just a machine that's like programmed
to avoid pain. So if you do that enough times
and it's painful, your brain's gonna be like, buddy, we
got to stop doing this.
Speaker 3 (17:32):
We need to do something.
Speaker 2 (17:33):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (17:33):
Yeah, So yeah, the crawl game this thing I don't.
I have a love hate relationship with it, and I
love it more than anything, but I hate that it's
so hard.
Speaker 2 (17:43):
What's your take on like Melbourne Comedy Festival and doing
those sort of things, because in what regard in regards
to like I've heard like, because we're getting to the
point now where we could either do like a split
bill half an hour each or like some put on
like some sort of show or showcase style still line up.
But I've seen a lot of people that they either
(18:04):
do fringe or they do comedy festivals and they're like, oh,
once I do that, like that's going to be like
the next level, and then they just fucking blow all
their money and then they get disheartened and then they
either quit or fucking they just never do it again.
Speaker 3 (18:16):
Yeah, you've got to you've got to be ready for that,
and you do. Like, Look, the Melbourne International Comedy Festival
is the biggest branded comedy thing in Australia. It's like
the Grand Final of comedy. You've got six hundred plus
people doing shows. You've got all of the best comedians
in Australia doing shows. Yeah, and you've got to go
(18:37):
and compete and the people that don't do it well.
And I know because my first one was difficult. Yep,
because you're in the fucking next league, can't you know
what I mean? What do you expect You're just going
to play like suburban footy and.
Speaker 2 (18:49):
Then competing because it is like, as much as we
all want to be on the same team, we're all comics.
Speaker 3 (18:55):
It's commeding, it's competing, but you don't want anyone else
to fail. Yes, so the whole population. But it's like,
we're gonna go to comedy festl wh should we see?
We've We've got our options are an infinite right now?
Right Why should anyone see you? Okay, don't worry about
like what even before what you're going to say? What
does your fucking poster look like? Does it look like
what everyone else has look like as far as standard,
(19:15):
because if it doesn't, you're not in the league yet.
What is my like bio and the pitches is does
it look like everyone else's that stuff you can just
fix by what if you're going to identify what's bad
and what's good, look at what's good. Take it to
someone who does stuff like photos and I want something
like this, but I'm thinking this, and they go, do
you mean that? You go, yeah, yeah, pay them some
(19:35):
fucking money. Yeah, that's what standard is.
Speaker 2 (19:39):
Rather than spending all this money on like other shit,
or spending all your time perfecting a show that no
one's going to come to because you haven't done the
other shit to get people in the fucking door in
the first place, to be the greatest show on earth.
But if you've got five people in there and you
perform it, it's not going to go well, even if
it's fucking great. That's just how comedy works. Like this club, Like,
(20:00):
if there's forty people in here, like last night, it's
a lot harder than if there's a ninety. Of course,
you could have a mediocre sette and do fucking really well.
If there's ninety people in there. I've seen it all
the time. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (20:11):
Also get a room that you can manage. Yeah, I
did that, laid fringe last three years. Twenty seater.
Speaker 2 (20:17):
M it's great, rape Yeah, it would be easy.
Speaker 3 (20:19):
First year when I got eight in there, I'm like,
fuck it, dude, really help exactly, and it's great.
Speaker 2 (20:24):
Whereas if you have to sell one hundred tickets to
get it awful.
Speaker 3 (20:26):
I started out three nights on the weekend being in
the MCG Yeah the best, right, Yeah, and then you
get to focus your time on doing the thing that
you wanted to go and do.
Speaker 2 (20:34):
There the whole time.
Speaker 3 (20:35):
I see so many people got it's pretty good. Man.
I've got this eighty seater and I'm going to like
this city?
Speaker 2 (20:40):
Am I cool? Like do you know anyone there?
Speaker 3 (20:42):
They're like nah, But I've like kind a flyer and
I'm like that sounds like for shows.
Speaker 2 (20:49):
Well, we're lucky here because we have we fly at
the venue. So like we're trying to get these new
shows up on Wednesday. One's a talent show, one's a
new material night, and so we'll fly to the open
mic shows because that's people that are coming out for free.
So leaning up to it. People are here Tuesday for
the open mic, and it's free. We'll just fly them
on the way out the door, just let them know
(21:09):
that there's a show on. But when I first started flying,
I was just out on the street just handing out
flyers to fucking everyone, and like no one turned up,
And I'm like, of course, of course, no one fucking knows.
Speaker 3 (21:18):
I mean, door dash things have you been given?
Speaker 2 (21:20):
Yeah, do you get door dash?
Speaker 3 (21:21):
Because like you put the.
Speaker 1 (21:22):
Now I live in the middle of nowhere. We don't
have door dash.
Speaker 3 (21:25):
Would you grab that thing? Grab your phone, put the
QR code in, go into there, go through seven links,
get a burger to Like, there's so many obstacles right right,
So when it comes to I don't talk all day
about this shit because I don't know about it. But yeah,
flying's got nothing to do with quantity, right, Like I
would rather give three flyers out to somebody who stops
and speaks to me for ten minutes, then give a
(21:45):
thousand to people walking past, going hey, mate it with me, Like,
what's think about every fly you've been given? Because the
fucking bin, Yeah, where's in your pocket?
Speaker 2 (21:54):
And here, what the hell's this? You throw it out? Later?
Speaker 3 (21:56):
Right? I would rather go hey, and they look at
me and go have you been many before? They go,
I haven't, Actually you should. I've got this thing. This
is who I am, this is what I've done. Comedy
Fessel's usually like this, like, but I reckon. The small
ones are really cool. You never know who you're going
to see. But I've also got this little code on
the back here for you. No one else knows this,
but it's only for this fly and it gives you
(22:16):
two for one, so you can bring your friend, right.
Speaker 2 (22:18):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (22:18):
And if you can ask someone to come there and
they're not like, come here and spend some money, you
can be like, I've got a gift, let's go out
on me.
Speaker 2 (22:25):
You're giving some sort of value with the file, right. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (22:29):
It's like this is going to sound weird, but it's
like e commerce. Okay, So think about every ad that
is ever popped up in your phone. Right, it's a
T shirt company. You've never heard the T shirt? What
does the T shirt fucking ad say? It says eighty
percent off sale ends tomorrow, right.
Speaker 2 (22:45):
So you're the fear missing out.
Speaker 3 (22:47):
And you go that shirt looks a right, Oh my god,
it's turning your sent off right, you need to approach
it like that. This person doesn't know who you are. Hey, man,
do you want to come to a comedy fessel show?
It is half priced right now, but I'm going to
need you to book it in the next ten minutes
because the code runs out. Yeah, okay, Like what do
you value are you giving these strangers because it's not
you because they don't know who you are? Right, So
(23:10):
if you can start gathering your head around all of
that shit, yeah, the stuff that you never thought about. Like,
if I had to do one course to get better
at comedy, I would do a marketing course at university
and figure out why people sell, why people buy things.
Speaker 2 (23:28):
I don't even think that'd fucking work too, because I
reckon marketing at UNI is probably like old school way
of doing it, like it just and it changes so
fast these days, you've got to really be like in
it doing.
Speaker 3 (23:39):
It even better. To save yourself some money, go buy
one off the internet. Go buy one hundred moisturizers, right,
get them delivered to your house. They cost five dollars each, right,
sit them there and go and sell these hundred moisturizers, right,
and then go While I panted out flyers and no
one bought any moisturizer. Okay, sweet. So then I'm going
to try it tomorrow and I'm going too out fifty
(24:00):
in this way and I got cool. I sold too, right,
So I've got some data. Now I'm going to drop
x amount of things in some letterboxes. I'm going to
put a different QR code on that so I can
track who goes into this website through this. Right, then
you go cool, that doesn't worry. I'm going to put
some social media posts out and see what happens. Right,
That's how you get better at comedy, yeah, because like
you're going to open yourself, you're going to well, you're
(24:21):
going to open yourself up to like sixteen different ways
that don't work, and then you find out what does
and then you double down on that. Yes, yeah, that's
how I would get better at anything. Right. So during
the example, during the comedy festival, right, i was running
a venue. We were advertising shows. Right, I'm like still
a relatively like nobody as far as like visually recognized comedian,
(24:44):
which is fine, happy with that. I was putting ads
up that were like this guy, here's a cool review,
he sold out this he's done that. It went fine
as soon as I changed a sponsored ad narrative to
we were in Richmond, which is one so about the
ads said stuff going into the city. No one likes
(25:04):
it anyway, come down and have a cocktail and have
a good night. It's been a rough week. That ad
performed sixteen times better than anything else because we weren't
selling me anymore.
Speaker 2 (25:18):
People really are sheep, aren't they? You just got to
hurt them and we were just selling them a fee.
Speaker 3 (25:26):
So then sorry to figure that out? Is grab two
hundred bucks?
Speaker 1 (25:30):
Right?
Speaker 3 (25:30):
Or four different styles of ads out? Here's the thing,
here's the thing, here's a cocktail special, here's this emotion. Right,
data comes back, look at which one performs better. Then
throw all of your rec of your marketing behind the
one that.
Speaker 2 (25:44):
Performs the best.
Speaker 3 (25:45):
That's how like any other business would do something. So
why the fuck don't we Yeah.
Speaker 2 (25:50):
Because we're comedians, we're not fucking digital like, we're not SEO.
People have to do it.
Speaker 3 (25:57):
The hack of the whole thing is the better you
get at that, the more time you get to do
comm Yeah, the whole thing, right, No, that's the whole thing. Yeah,
and it's it's fascinating.
Speaker 2 (26:06):
I love it.
Speaker 1 (26:06):
So I read this book where they were doing like
voter polling or whatever, or they're trying to actually they're
trying to gather donations for like a specific party, and
they were talking about like the yes theory, like getting
them to say yes.
Speaker 3 (26:23):
It's like, oh, yeah, do you get one yes? Then
your next yes? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (26:25):
Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah yeah, and then and then they
walk them through like multiple yeses, and they're like, all right, sweet,
would you like to donate? And everyone's like no, and
he goes all right, So I rock up and I
go let's just fucking do the opposite. Like do you
like the way this country is being run?
Speaker 2 (26:41):
No?
Speaker 1 (26:42):
Do you think your politicians care about you?
Speaker 2 (26:44):
No?
Speaker 1 (26:45):
Do you think there's anything you can do about it?
Probably not? What if I told you there was?
Speaker 3 (26:51):
I want to vote already.
Speaker 1 (26:52):
Yeah, it's exactly. That's really cool exactly. And then you're like, oh, really,
I'm like, how about you support this guy? This is
what he's after. Can I be credit card details?
Speaker 2 (27:02):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (27:03):
You know what, let's fucking do it. Let's make a change.
So like, dude, like what you just said then like
the idea of like you're not selling a show, you're
selling an idea. I was just like straight away, I
was like, we run a Wednesday show, fucking hump days. Bang.
Speaker 2 (27:20):
Right away.
Speaker 1 (27:20):
I was like, all right, sweet, let's fucking sell a
midweek hump days show.
Speaker 2 (27:24):
Yeah, like we sell a date night or whatever. Yeah,
you're selling the feeling rather Yeah.
Speaker 3 (27:29):
And unless you're the faces on the on the poster
mean anything.
Speaker 2 (27:34):
You don't have them. Yeah. Where we were like putting
the MC's face on the poster and there was all
this work because you're like, oh, it's another week of
fucking doing this open Mico, cut it out.
Speaker 3 (27:46):
That's not right megapixel yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (27:48):
Yeah, it's like, why the fuck are we doing this?
No one knows who whoever this MC is.
Speaker 3 (27:53):
You spend any money on ads, not anymore, right, because
you weren't getting what you want to do it well.
Speaker 2 (27:58):
Because we were doing it initially. Don't worry about too much.
Initially we were I was doing ads and we were
doing we were charging for people to come in for
the talent show.
Speaker 3 (28:10):
How much like ten bucks yep.
Speaker 2 (28:12):
Which is almost a disservice sometimes because you do have it.
Like if the people that have paid the money and
turn up, they're invested and they're like sick, that's great,
but for ten bucks, it's like the cost of a drink.
So like the more that the logic was if it's
a free show, like the open Mic. The open MIC's
free and it's getting crazy numbers like sixty Yeah, well,
(28:38):
like if you can get that many people in and
they just buy a drink and there's drink specials on
the night, then you're already ahead of like making them
log in, buy a ticket all that shit to take
a punt on a show that's like a talent show
that may not be good. But I don't know whether
that's the right logic or not.
Speaker 3 (28:57):
How much does the show cost you to make the
talent show?
Speaker 2 (29:01):
Talent shows, like I pay fifty bucks for the third
member on the panel, So me and Minch would be
like the third person on the guest panel because we'd
chat to the acts, So fifty bucks for that. I
put up fifty bucks for a prize, and then like
I'm just some miscellaneous props and gags and shit.
Speaker 3 (29:17):
Obviously you're not getting paid, No, we're not getting paid. Yeah,
so well if this is my show, yeah, right, first
thing I was doing is I go how much would
I like to get paid? Yeah, I go, why for
your time? I want to get one hundred and fifty
dollars each, right, So then i'd add three hundred dollars
onto your cost. Right, you might not pay yourself for
a while, but that's that's the cost, right, It's still
there time and effort. Then I would cack how much
(29:38):
time it takes you to organize and all that sort
of stuff, And I would go in and find out
what the minimum wages, which is like twenty eight thirty dollars.
I would calculate that by how many hours you put
in That goes on top of the cost yep, Right,
because you want to make that thing sustainable, you're going
to have to hit that, yeah, and then you want
to grow that. That's how many other business works, right Exactly.
You want to open a cafe, You're not like yeah,
but like we're here, and we're here anyway, so you
want to earn some money, right, You've got fucking hourss
(29:59):
and shit man, So then you go all right, cools
the show on paper, like the minimum spend is one
hundred dollars for the stuff, but we want to get
this to making six hundred bucks let's work around that.
Then I would go, well, at ten dollars, right, or
drinks or whatever that ends up being. You organize some
form of commerce steel, right, and you go, if we
(30:21):
can get x amount of people in there, what it's
at worth? What would that be good worth for you guys?
They go, well, if we get fifty people in there
and they all spend twenty dollars, right, there's your sort
of mathematics on that. You go, cook, we're a twenty
percent of night, yeah, and they go yeah, like if
you're creating the business, sure, right, And then you go
all right, cool, how do we get fifty people on?
Speaker 4 (30:39):
And then that becomes your the stage on that because
I've had that thought the bar's going to generate x
amount of money if we can bring the people in
consistently and go like, all right, this is making some
money for it.
Speaker 2 (30:50):
We need to make some money back. But yeah, then
that's where I'm stuck, is like the how the fuck
did you get people out on a Wednesday?
Speaker 3 (30:58):
And then you go, I'm going to try all of
the things, so same thing I would start with like
ten bucks on like ten different ads. You go, because
you say to each other, you go do you want
to spend one hundred bucks and figure out how to
be successful? The answer is yes every time. Right, So
you go, all right, let's think of ten ideas. Now
go one of them is like a little skit. One
of them whatever the give it. You'll be surprised what works.
That's the thing. But you don't know unless you give
(31:19):
it a go. And then you go, holy shit, people
are really around this thing. Or maybe it's a clip
from the last show or like the people like dying
or whatever. And then like, I'm going to watch that
sort of thing and you go, oh, maybe we're selling
it's a freak, like you don't know what you're going
to get. Yeah, maybe that's what people actually want in
the middle of the week. And then then you go,
this video worked really well. All right, let's put these
(31:40):
words on it. Think your week was bad, come down
and watch the talent show. Yeah, video with something dying?
Speaker 2 (31:46):
Right, Yeah.
Speaker 3 (31:47):
And then you go, all right, we know these video
is working the most. Now let's do that again ten
times with a different caption. Yeah, week's going good, like whatever,
Try ten different things. Get more data on that, right,
and you spend hundred dollars and then you finally whittle
it down to like this fucking science of thing, and
then you go, let's spend six hundred bucks on it. Yeah,
(32:09):
and then you go, holy shit, we fucking sold out. Yeah,
what's the bargain? The bar goes, Jesus is going good guys,
you go, no, I reckon, we could put ten bucks
on this. Yeah, ten by ninety that's that's nine hundred bucks.
And you go, cool, we've made three hundred dollars profit
off our figure that we figured out that we need
to make a successful business.
Speaker 2 (32:25):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (32:26):
Yeah, the the new material night we're rolling at the moment,
We're gonna put a little bit of money behind.
Speaker 2 (32:35):
Ads for it.
Speaker 1 (32:36):
I'm going to start the ads a bit earlier, and
it's a free show. But at the end of the
show we'll be like, hey, there's a free show. Great,
but if you think this was worth something, if you
want to.
Speaker 2 (32:49):
Support the acts.
Speaker 1 (32:51):
Yeah, So we've got like a tap and pay over
the bar, so on the way out, just tap your card,
take your twenty seconds, bang and then if we can
get you know, if we get twenty people in the
door and then they all give us ten bucks, well
then yeah, we're sweet, all right. At least, the goal
is to build it to the point where it doesn't
(33:12):
cost the club any money, because at the moment it does,
we're so fucking lucky here that can or turn.
Speaker 2 (33:20):
It a goal?
Speaker 3 (33:21):
Yeah, man, the goal should be to get it so
good that other clubs want it.
Speaker 2 (33:27):
Yeah, one hundred percent.
Speaker 3 (33:29):
So then you go, well, if that becomes a new goal,
then you write down, what's my goal. What would we
need to do to make other clubs go, hey, guys,
we don't do anything on this night, would you want to.
Speaker 2 (33:40):
Do your show here?
Speaker 3 (33:41):
And you go, yeah, cool, work be like two grand
or something, and they go, yeah, that's great, because like
we can make a sort of money, right, So then
you start reverse engineering that and you go, what are
we going to need? You know, like you look at
the other people that have done that format kill Tony's
the fucking the high bar of the whole thing. Well,
we're going to have to get some equipment, which you've
already got, right, so you've got the means to make things.
Speaker 2 (34:01):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (34:01):
So now all of a sudden you can start reaching
into the sphere of not only people that don't know
about comedy existing in the city, just other people in
Australia being like that's awesome. Yeah, because like if it's
good enough, then people will clone you clone your idea
as well. You'll be like that's our idea and you're
like yeah, because it's fucking good. Yeah, that's what you want. Yeah,
(34:23):
and if you're the first to market with it, then
you'll always be the first.
Speaker 2 (34:27):
Yeah. Well, obviously, like a talent show, gong show is
not like an original idea, but you can It's like
like anything, like even the online content and stuff. It's
like you take that idea like I know that works
as a show concept or whatever it is, and then
you put your own spin on it and you're like, well,
this is our version of it.
Speaker 3 (34:43):
Yeah, and then I would be punching out to other
people that do talent stuff. So I'm assuming if I
were to grab out my phone right now and I
was to go onto Facebook, and I was to go
Newcastle music Scene, Newcastle, improv, Newcastle, all of these things, right,
there's going to be people doing stuff grab like yourself
and other shit hot sort of like call out, hey, team,
do this thing every Wednesday. We'd love to see small
faces down here start getting people who will bring ten friends. Yeah, yeah,
(35:07):
I'd like, we'd love some storytellers, we'd love some fucking
Shakespeare stuff like whatever. Right, and you bring them down
and then you make fun of it because it's hilarious,
and then all of a sudden, the conversation the next
day at work, right, think about think about the consumer.
It's Thursday, you walk into work, you're a bit dusty.
They go, fuck, what did you do last night? You're like,
(35:27):
you've been a Newcastle comedy club before. They go, Ah,
I've been meaning to go. So there's this talent show
on a Wednesday. It's fucking cooked. We're going back next week.
It's so funny, like it beers stuff, it was cheap
drinks in that. We're going there. What do you guys
doing next week? Let's go to the thing create that
because that's more powerful than anything.
Speaker 1 (35:45):
Yeah, yeah, and well yeah that was exactly one of
the things as well. I was like, I've I've started
hitting up different because last last time we did the
talent show man it was it was a little bit disappointing. Man.
We didn't get anyone, like, we got very few people
from the scene turning on.
Speaker 2 (36:05):
To do this. It's literally free stage.
Speaker 1 (36:07):
Time for any of the open micers whatever, and I
was like, all right, fuck it, let's let's just start
hitting people up. And then like we're hitting people up,
we're booking on and then I was like, fuck it.
Let's like I've started like looking up magicians in the
Newcastle area, but let's get some fucking magicians. Let's get
like just different people and be like, hey, look we've
(36:29):
got a show, like this is the format whatever. But
you're also going to get like a mad clip out
of it put up on Instagram and like here's here's
what like we're selling sort of thing. That's what I
was trying to do with like the show No Holt's Barred.
I was like, it's just the fucking most hardcore like
(36:50):
comedy show that I could think of, where like anything goes.
It's like and you might turn up and you might
fucking crush because you're doing dead baby jokes and that
that's what people turned up and see. And you might
fucking eat your ass because you decided you were going
to do a musical act and you didn't prepare properly,
and the fucking sound guy didn't know that he is
(37:12):
supposed to play the music. You might fucking and you
might die. And that's funny too.
Speaker 3 (37:18):
That's the funniest thing I could ever watching that certain scenario.
Speaker 2 (37:23):
Yeah, so sell that, yeah exactly.
Speaker 3 (37:26):
So what's the feeling the feelings like my mat or
is it like this thing's whack and you don't and
you might see a dead baby joke and a fucking
flute player.
Speaker 2 (37:32):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (37:33):
Yeah, Like figure out what people want and like I
only learned this recently, but like, so I'm going to
geck out for a second. But I read this book
a couple of weeks ago. So essentially I read like
a business book every couple of weeks, just learn, learn, learn,
try and get some more. And I read this book
no shout out, but like it's called million Dollar Weekend, right,
and it's like how to make a million dollar business
(37:54):
on a weekend. And you're like, obviously that's not true.
But the whole idea of the book is like you
should really figure out if you've got something people want
before you go get a fucking email address, like a
business card. What everyone knows or does is they go,
I'm going to create a logo, I'm going to do this,
I'm going to do that, I'm going to do all
these things and they go who wants it? And go
no one wants it? And you go what is it?
And you go, fuck, I've just wasted time of money.
So the idea is you go like, all right, I've
(38:17):
got a business idea. I'm going to walk I'm going
to walk people's dogs. So instead of going and making
all that sort of stuff, well, out your phone message
ten people you know with a dog and be like
can I walk your dog for fifty bucks? And they
go nah, man. And if you get ten notes like
to those to people that are close to you, you
(38:38):
don't have a business.
Speaker 2 (38:39):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (38:39):
But if they go nah, and you go I go, hey,
what what would you let? What would it be with
your dog that I could do that you would pay
me fifty dollars for? And they're like if all of
them come back and they're like, hey, washing him, then
your actual businesses you need to create a dog washing business.
And you can figure that out like after you drop
seventy grand into a business idea, or you can figure
(39:02):
that out before you do anything.
Speaker 2 (39:03):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (39:03):
Right. So I was thinking of a show idea the
other day, got carried away with my creativity and I
was like, I like, choose your own adventure books like
what if for can do the show and love of
the Audience looh blah blah blah blah. So I was like,
stop myself. After reading this book, kind of figured out
what it's going to be. Put on my phone. I
messaged four people and I said, I'm doing this show
like honest opinion, and they went down, really get it,
(39:26):
and I went thanks, and I just kept moving on.
That's way better than writing a show doing go on.
Speaker 2 (39:34):
Adelaide Yeah, spending thousands of dollars.
Speaker 3 (39:36):
Spending thousands of dollars and then going such and such. Right,
but if you send that We did that with another idea,
which I am going ahead with. Send that out to them,
and they they went, fuck, yeah, man, I'd watch that
and you go done. I trust that. Now, let's put
the time and effort into the thing. Yeah, take it
all back, right, get Monostory's data. It's a fucking data
(39:58):
on everything, right, because we do that with jokes. You're
with his idea. I'm going to stand up in front
of eight people and they go, I like that. I'm
going to keep doing it. Yeah, they hate it ten times.
Speaker 1 (40:07):
You stop, ideally, ideally, maybe you'll keep doing it for
five years.
Speaker 2 (40:16):
This one's for me.
Speaker 3 (40:18):
If that's the case, you're unhelpable, that's like a disability thing.
Speaker 1 (40:23):
That's the idea that sorry, Brian.
Speaker 3 (40:26):
And I'm trying to get super qualified at that, yeah,
because realistically, I just want to tell some fucking jokes. Bro.
I love it more than anything in the world.
Speaker 2 (40:35):
But like, well, there's some other cool stuff that you're
doing as well. Was like the toilet paper, getting that going.
Speaker 3 (40:42):
That's the help comedy, is it? I'm gonna celsish, I'm selling.
I'm selling to my selfish bastard.
Speaker 2 (40:47):
I thought you were doing it for the veterans. Do
you know it? Well?
Speaker 3 (40:51):
Yeah, but I was a guy came to me and
he's like, I've got this idea. He's like, do you
want to do the marketing? And I said yep, And
I said how do you And said to him, how
are we going to sell this stuff? And he goes, oh,
And I said, I think we can sell it to people,
or we can sell it to organizations. And then we
figured out that's the key, right. That has been the
(41:12):
best thing that's been for my comedy. Do you know why?
So I have to email one hundred people to get
one answer back.
Speaker 2 (41:19):
Yeah, yeah, that sucks versus bookers in comedy.
Speaker 3 (41:22):
Do you know how much that sucks? But like, once
you get like enough rejections that it doesn't matter anymore. Yeah,
you're fucking nearly invincible.
Speaker 2 (41:31):
Yeah, did you like? That's it?
Speaker 3 (41:33):
So then when I'm like, I want to do my
solo show somewhere, and I'm like, okay, i'll just email
one hundred people yep, country pub and stuff, you guys go, yeah,
we've had a band before. Okay, cool? Sweet. You get
twelve in and then you can either look at it
you're like, I got eighty eight. No's yeah, you can
go twelve gigs made a grand right, and then you
go holy shit. All right, Ways, if I did a thousand, okay, cool,
(41:56):
take it back to data. How long did it take
me to send a hundred email? It took me two
hours and fifteen minutes.
Speaker 2 (42:02):
Okay.
Speaker 3 (42:03):
If I want to send a thousand, it's going to
take me twenty.
Speaker 2 (42:06):
Hours half a week.
Speaker 3 (42:08):
So I'll do five hours a week for a month,
and then I'll do a thousand. If I get twelve
out of one hundred, when I times out by four,
so sorry, times out by ten. Then I could potentially
get one hundred and twenty gigs hanging one thousand dollars.
Speaker 1 (42:19):
And you've right, you've fucking you've filled your years.
Speaker 2 (42:24):
That's it. Yeah, I think that's it trying to sell
saw balloon jack alone.
Speaker 3 (42:29):
But it's weird that, Like, that's why I said buy some.
If you want to get good at comedy, if you
want to get good at producing comedy shows, try to
sell anything, right, because you're not doing You're not doing
comedy when you're trying to sell a show somewhere, forget
that you're doing sales. Yeah, because the person on the
other side is a customer and they go, what am
I getting out of this? And they're not getting a
(42:50):
good night where the community comes in and that right,
what you're getting. What they're getting is the opportunity to
make four to five thousand dollars.
Speaker 2 (42:58):
Right.
Speaker 3 (42:59):
So if you solve that, properm them in your head.
So I was when I was first trying to go
regional and all this sort of stuff. I was going, hey,
man'll clean them up and come and all this sort
of stuff. Be awesome to be able to like. And
they're like, no, no, no. As soon as you flip
the switch flip script and be like, hey mate, I
got this thing you want to buy. It's fifteen hundred dollars.
But if you get fifty people on here times this
(43:20):
much sort of minimum spend, then you'll be looking to
make four to five thousand dollars. I've got weeks open
in this month, it's in this week of this month,
three months away. Can I lock in?
Speaker 2 (43:32):
Yep?
Speaker 3 (43:33):
And they're like, the question now is then do I
want to spend fifteen hundred dollars to make four grant?
That question's very easy to answer.
Speaker 2 (43:40):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (43:40):
The other the other question you're asking is do you
want to give me a shot? That's very easy to
say no to or more commonly ignore. And if they
don't get back, then the next week, when you sit
down for five hours, you're like, I've got these follow
ups to go and then I'll try to another hundred,
and then you just go, hey, man said your email
(44:01):
last week, just ticking them off at the moment because
things are getting like filling up at the moments. I'd
love to lock you in. If you don't want it,
say so immediately and I'll take off a list. Otherwise
I'll send you another email in two weeks, yeah, keep
a million, and then like they're like, I want an
email in two weeks. Yeah, oh hey man, sorry, we're busy.
No worries the next one and no worries. Man, Hey,
what would it take for you in the future to
make this a yes, because I'm happy to work around you.
(44:23):
And then they go, oh, I think like it's probably
the price point, and you go, oh sweak. We do
it for eight hundred bucks ten but I'll tell you what.
I'll just do like a forty minute instead, and they
go yeah, no way, they do undred bucks. Yeah cool,
I can make this amount of money. Then you go
there and you go but I can't do it on
Friday and Saturday, but I can do it on a
Sunday or a Thursday. And they go all right, We've
got nothing going on Thursday. Then you've got one extra gig.
Then it goes well. Then the next year, hey mate,
(44:45):
I want to make five grand. Yeah yeah, you're not
selling you. So think about them, right, they're the customer,
y Like, what are they getting out of it? They're
getting you're selling them a business model yep.
Speaker 2 (44:59):
And then well, I guess when you started doing shows
like that, were you offering. Were you selling your own
tickets or are you getting the venue? Like they'd sell
the tickets and take.
Speaker 3 (45:10):
Either other, I mean profeably. You want them to buy
it off you. Yeah, I'm just using that figure of
fifteen hundred for like a example, hot tip. Anyone else
who's doing that around the area. Set up a message
and just be like, we're thinking about doing this. We
don't want to undercut. Yeah, yeah, if you don't mind sharing,
we'd love to, because the last thing we want to
(45:31):
do is like tox you know, make your business, cannibalize
your business. Any fucking normal person in their right mind
would go, this is thank you so much to do yeah,
because like that's how fucking capitalism works, right, But you
can be like ethical.
Speaker 2 (45:45):
About it, yeah, otherwise it's just a race to the bottom.
Speaker 3 (45:48):
Is totally right. Ideally want them to buy it off you,
because then your budgeting is all fine if you can
market as in like you figure out how to do
that stuff.
Speaker 2 (46:00):
Yeah, you're back on yourself that you're going to.
Speaker 3 (46:02):
Then you might as you should do the tickets, yes,
because then that deal that you offered him, which is true,
is now yours.
Speaker 2 (46:11):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (46:11):
Yeah, you're dead of getting fifteen hundred.
Speaker 2 (46:13):
Now you're correct, but you're getting more reward totally, And.
Speaker 3 (46:17):
Then you don't don't live in your mind from gig
to gig, right and go well, this one was right,
made eight hundred, and this one was four hundred, but
that one was three grand. You go, well, we're doing
these ten gigs and we know probably we're going to
cancel too. That's just kind of life. We know one
will probably pop off unexpectedly and that might make four grand.
That's business. Yeah, that's just how business works.
Speaker 2 (46:39):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (46:40):
Yeah, you run a restaurant some weeks, quiet, Yeah, run
a comedy club some nights. Some nights don't have as
many on because something else is doing something in the area. Yeah,
just just fucking chill out. Yeah, you're not a failure.
You're just a person running another small business in a
country full of small businesses. Just figure out how to
do that. Yeah, that's it.
Speaker 2 (47:02):
That's so sick, dude, Yeah, fucking because Yeah, I think a.
Speaker 3 (47:06):
Lot of you know what, it is not funny, it's
there's nothing funny about it. But I thought when I
was going to do comedy, it was just going to
be hilarious the whole time, and now I'm like what,
But like, if you can figure that out, you can
do more of the thing that is. Yeah, and I
think everybody wants to get out of the swamp and
the swamp when it is the bottom scene. Right, I'm
(47:27):
trying this stuff. I'm not getting the laughs I want.
I want to perform to real people. I want X, Y,
and Z right the sooner you can get out of
the swamp. Like you're a professional comedian and it's got
nothing to do with how funny you are. Yeah, but
if you're both try not make try not make money.
Speaker 2 (47:46):
Oh yeah, yeah, put those two things together.
Speaker 3 (47:49):
That's what I think, and I think hopefully if I
can upskill both at the same time, then down the
line is very exciting. Oh yeah, because you've done your
bombing in every area, You've bombed it. Your fucking one week,
no one got back to me. Yeah, and I was like,
I don't know how food's getting on the table. Also,
eight ship four times. Life sucks, but this is what
(48:12):
this life. This is hard, and sometimes that's what hard
feels like. Yeah, So like get back at it because
six years down the line, when you're like, oh fuck,
I got a tax problem. Yeah, that's just like that's
you've you've crushed it that hard where you're like, I
need to invest some shit because I need to write
this stuff off. Do you think I'm not there yet?
But I think that's how you get there.
Speaker 2 (48:33):
Do you think being like in the military that helped
you develop this type of mindset where you just like
you're figuring it out, but you're just a bit more
hardened than like your regular fucking op's going to be
like fuck this ship and give up.
Speaker 3 (48:49):
Look, that's that's the number one question I get, right,
And you've probably I don't know if you agree with this.
Speaker 2 (48:54):
He at military too, Yeah, I know.
Speaker 3 (48:56):
So I think the best thing I got out of
the military was I saw complete pieces of shit.
Speaker 1 (49:03):
You're looking at one, you're looking at one.
Speaker 3 (49:05):
Yeah, get turned into semi competent people through systems.
Speaker 2 (49:13):
Yeah, no talent, sheer repetition.
Speaker 3 (49:16):
So fucking gene Pool just like we've been doing this
since sticks and stones, and we've got we've got, we've reckon,
we've got all right at it hm, and we're going
to apply that on mass to like children like eighteen
year olds, and on the other end, we have a
success rate of like eighty something percent and then we
can professionally murder people. Yeah, fucking not bad, not bad
(49:36):
business model.
Speaker 2 (49:37):
Right.
Speaker 3 (49:39):
I when I was in the military, I saw a
thousand people say I can't do this, and then fucking
did something that was like the coolest thing I ever
saw someone on that wall wall, Yeah, the big one
whether like a yeah.
Speaker 1 (49:51):
Dude, I only fucking disloc added some dude's hip on
that thing.
Speaker 3 (49:54):
Crushes your soul.
Speaker 1 (49:55):
Man, that thing, dude, I pull.
Speaker 3 (49:57):
Those motherfuckers and get over over yeah right. And it's
like since getting out, I'm like, I've just got to
be the guy that like yells at myself to get
over the fucking wall.
Speaker 2 (50:09):
Yeah, your jewel sergeant.
Speaker 3 (50:11):
So it's just the military sucked heaps, right, dude.
Speaker 2 (50:15):
It teaches you.
Speaker 1 (50:16):
It teaches your failure though, like they in your basic
training and you remember, this is like that fucking hell
week where everything you do fucking sucks and you can't
do anything wrong and it's a week after everything you
did was fucking shit hot and perfect. And what they
do is they build you up and then they fucking
destroy you. And it is it is hands and it's crazy.
Speaker 3 (50:41):
Yeah, yeah, dude, Like because they also fucking not conquer,
like you put in a lot of people up.
Speaker 1 (50:48):
Yeah, and dude, you could drink with the best of
them too. That's that's really what it comes down to.
But like that the psychology of like when they're when
they're building you up and when you're liking that shit
hot week, Dude, you remember how fucking crisp your drill was,
fucking high your chin is, yeah, and everyone's good, everyone's
(51:12):
fucking perfect, dude, and no one can fuck with you.
No one can fuck with you. If you go to
pet that week, dude, you're doing You're doing fucking sprints
four hundred meters. You're like, holy fuck, dude, I can't
get passed. I'm doing fucking crazy chin ups. And then
the next week, dude, they're like you, you're all out
of time. You're fucking you shook. You're all of a sudden,
(51:34):
like you're missing stuff that you shouldn't have missed, like
and it's like the most depressing thing in the world.
And then they get you get out of it, and
they're like, right at the end of the course, like,
oh yeah, that was all on purpose.
Speaker 2 (51:46):
It was all on purpose.
Speaker 1 (51:47):
Everything you went through is on purpose, and you got
through it, and you're like, oh, fuck, I did get
through it, and then all of a sudden, something shitty
happens and you're like, oh, you know what, I know
what that feels like.
Speaker 3 (51:58):
It'll be okay, I guess feeling that Like I compute
this to like how ultra marathon runners feel or someone
who's climbed Everest or whatever that is. Like, I remember
when they do that sleep deprivation in infantry training. You
stay awake for like three days fucking rainder out through hours.
I was in a trench for water. You gotta like
it sucks. And I think it's really good to know
(52:22):
what it hard feels like, because the best thing I
got for my comedy was kind of like a baseline
fucking limit of sucking. Because if the other idea is
like do you want to send two hundred and fifty
emails and maybe no one will get back to you,
I'm like, that's way easier than sleeping in a puddle.
(52:43):
That is like, like, I just know what bad is.
And then even of my experiences other people in the
military are like, you think that's bad, should be in
an ambush and fucking afghan And I'm like, yeah, being
in a tough situation isn't the worst thing. I talked
to a lot of people that do martial arts and
especially jiu jitsu, not for me, but they're like, yeah,
(53:04):
you get choked out heaps and it humbles you. I'm like,
that's weird, and they're like, no, it's good, yeah, because
that sucks. And I'm like I get it now. Yeah,
You're like.
Speaker 2 (53:13):
Sam's bombing and comedy. It sucks.
Speaker 3 (53:16):
That's why you gotta go to those other places. Otherwise
you get soft and you get comfy, and then you
go and then when you want to try something that's
past where you are like I'm going to go to
this festival and I'm going to get an eighty seater
and I'm going to do X, Y and Z, bucking
destroys you because you haven't gone You've gone from like
one to thirty and you haven't sucked along the way enough.
(53:39):
And I think that's what the best thing I got
out of the military base levels fucking misery.
Speaker 2 (53:45):
Things suck. Yeah, you can get through it, and once
you do, then you're.
Speaker 1 (53:49):
Like fuck even if you if you want, yeah, if
you fail and you put everything into it, it fucking
it doesn't hurt any less. But you're like, at the
end of the day, I sent two hundred and fifty emails.
We fucking put the work in and it didn't work out.
All right, Let's like all right, well now at least
(54:11):
at least we know what it doesn't work. It's better
than miss and sucking and failing exactly. And that's I
think what a lot of people at these festivals are doing.
And I still hold the opinion that they are a
fucking scam and like the majority of people are being
taken advantage of. But you can't argue with your results.
(54:32):
You can't argue with bad mums, you can't argue with
like all of these other people who are like the
mid level comedians who are doing well at these festivals.
And I'm like, okay, well, it's not a scam for everyone.
And what's what.
Speaker 2 (54:48):
Sets those people?
Speaker 1 (54:49):
Okay, they've got a great idea, they've marketed it, they
found their niche Like like, you're you're doing great online
because you do all these military videos, because there's fucking
how many thousand.
Speaker 3 (55:02):
And forty two of those before anyone watched.
Speaker 1 (55:04):
Yeah yeah, dude, but now but now it's like all
of a sudden, like you only need like one unit
to like share one of your videos, and all of
a sudden, like it hits the algorithm and then it's
out in the zeitglast and now you've got like young
seventeen year old hitting you up like I want to
join the military. And now you're doing Q and a's
and it's like knee and good numbers and it's like,
(55:24):
oh fuck, yeah, you sound you sing.
Speaker 2 (55:26):
Yeah, I think to go back to.
Speaker 3 (55:27):
The scam thing. It's like time and energy again. It's
not a scam. It's just a very good business model. Unfortunately,
those festivals have two customers. One of them is the
people that go watch comedy shows. What he was the
second one in the comedian I mean right, So if
you want to have a good business, you want to
(55:47):
increase your spend from each customer that you have. So
what are you going to do with your with your
customer base, You're going to be like these are how
much tickets are? We take this much? Also, if you
want a venue, by the way, you're going to have
to need insurance. But we got that. We've got If
you want to do our stuff, you can do this.
We've got a ticketing service if you need that. But
we take this much.
Speaker 2 (56:04):
Of a cut, right, It's all convenience.
Speaker 3 (56:07):
It's great business. Don't blame it, complain, don't play them
for playing the game. Well, yeah, you're right, because ideally,
ten years down the line, you want people to say
about you. You're like, have you seen those guys that
talent show that travel around everywhere? Fuck, that's a scam.
And you're like, why because lots of people go and
watch it and it makes heaps of money, Like, what
(56:28):
the fuck off? Man, what are you talking about? Yeah, yeah,
that's what I think about that. Yeah, find out the rules.
Do you know why bad Mums is successful because people
want to watch it?
Speaker 2 (56:40):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (56:40):
Yeah, because they have figured out that there is a
demographic of people that are underrepresented in a entertainment format,
and they've stepped up to the plate. They've delivered it
in with a great poster with awesome bios with I'm
sure the content's coming any minute. It's delivered in venues
(57:01):
that match the quality of the people that they want
to come to. It's not in dive bars, you know,
think about You've got to think about the back end too,
Like they didn't know it was going to be successful.
Speaker 2 (57:12):
Yeah, that was just going up taking the swing.
Speaker 3 (57:15):
So they stood up, they took a swing, they did it. Well,
it got paid back.
Speaker 2 (57:21):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (57:22):
Yeah, that's the price they paid before it happened was
we don't know if this is going to work, but
they see it anyway and let's do it as best
as we can.
Speaker 2 (57:33):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (57:33):
So when it comes to a festival, figure out their rules, yeah,
and then break them or go around it. Right. So
you go to a festival, right, one of the ways
that they're going to make some money out of you
is they're going to go, hey, you should come do
insert big, large comedy festival that I don't want to name, right,
(57:53):
and they go, you should get a venue. And then also,
by the way, we sell some guide space and it's
two thousand dollars for an ad and you go and
the person in he goes, well, I'm going to spend
that much and then I'm going to do this and
I'm going to do that.
Speaker 2 (58:05):
Right.
Speaker 3 (58:05):
See, you're like thousands of dollars in the whole Okay,
they're the rules, and they're like, we've got a little
workshop too, and this is we're going to tell you
how to do some marketing but then we're going to
provide all the solutions to the problems that we've told
you that it's going to. There's going to be along
the way. Yeah, there's more money, there's more revenue streams. No,
but I've watched a lot of people that. So then
you go back and you go, Okay, cool, should I
(58:27):
get a two thousand dollars add in a guide? Okay?
Instead of going I'm going to get a two thousand
dollars add in the guide and I'm going to wait
for all the people to come in. Instead, I would
think about every comedy festival show I've been to, and
I would imagine and remember the people in the line,
and I'm going to see if they any one of
them has a guide in their hand, because if they're
(58:49):
not going where are we going next, then you don't
have advertisement space.
Speaker 2 (58:55):
They're all on their phone.
Speaker 3 (58:56):
You've got an expensive fucking piece of printing paper. I
would take that two thousand dollars and I would bring
it to where people are. Where are they they're on
the phone? Buy the phone? Ats that's it?
Speaker 2 (59:14):
Or do you just buy a phone that's you to face.
You've got to do the work of your Facebook marketing.
Speaker 3 (59:20):
Think about the posters in a in a magazine you
want to go, I am doing a show. I'm an accountant,
So I'm going to do a show about accounting, and
I'm going to put that poster in a guide that
anyone can read. Or I'll spend the same money and
I'll go to a fucking social media company and I'll
(59:41):
say someone will give this to people who are in accounting. Yeah,
because the other way is just you're just shotgunning it.
Don't bring a fucking sledgehammer to a fucking surgery, right, Like,
spend your money on a skateboard scale the word scalpel.
Speaker 2 (59:58):
That's it.
Speaker 3 (01:00:00):
And if you can figure out them, because they're they're there,
they're trying to make some money them. Yeah, I don't
want it to go under. Yeah, I don't want them.
I don't want any festival to go under.
Speaker 1 (01:00:10):
No, because it just it reduces the opportunity.
Speaker 3 (01:00:13):
So yeah, learn how to be successful at them, you
know what I mean. It's like, I'm really good at rugby, okay,
but now i want to play AFL. Well, you're gonna
bring you a fucking rugby schools over there area. You're like,
I'm doing something different. Now I need a different set
of skills. What does that thing look like? How do
I stand out from the crowd? Yeah, that's that's my
two cents on that.
Speaker 2 (01:00:32):
Yeah, that makes sense. Good. Otherwise he's just going to
be throwing money into the pit.
Speaker 3 (01:00:37):
Yeah, And ask anyone if wh who does complain about
these things and go, oh, so you want it to
go bankrupt? They will say no, yeah, so you want
them to make money? Just not heaves and they're going,
I just think more should go. Well, maybe just be
a better artist. Yeah, And being a better artist isn't
(01:00:58):
just all about being on stage.
Speaker 1 (01:01:01):
Yeah, it's hard too, because if you haven't had someone
who's experienced to sit down and talk about it as well,
Like it's like, fuck, where do you start? Where do
you start?
Speaker 3 (01:01:12):
I was like computer alliterate. I was in the military,
these computers.
Speaker 2 (01:01:16):
Right, Yeah, and then I was a chef.
Speaker 3 (01:01:18):
Yeah, they punched some fucking like orders in and I
think during COVID, I was like I need to I
don't I need to learn some shit? Yeah, like I'm
not I'm still like this guy all that sort of stuff.
I was like, this is the cool thing about content, right?
YouTube is fucking incredible because the people who are providing
(01:01:42):
content on the internet. Right, you can go how do
I make money as an artist? You will get twenty
yet videos? Right, So just watch those twenty videos, take
what you want from them, and then you go, I
really understood this one and this one and this one,
but I didn't know when he was talking about like discipline,
what does that mean? So then you go back to
(01:02:02):
YouTube and you go, how to be disciplined? Another twenty
videos comes up? Watch those fucking twenty videos, right, take
what you want out of it, and go, I don't
know what it means. By like waking up early? How
to wake up early? You're like, holy shit, you put
your phone alarm in a different room. Yep, Like, that's
the figure out what the problem is? I want to
get up early. The problem isn't you're sleepy, And the
(01:02:23):
solution is quit drinking whatever the fuck it is for you.
Speaker 2 (01:02:27):
Yep.
Speaker 3 (01:02:28):
Yeah, find the You ever heard about the five whys?
Speaker 2 (01:02:31):
No?
Speaker 3 (01:02:31):
No, you've got a problem, right, The problem is Its
example from something I saw recently, is a factory machine
keeps clogging up. Let's say they make tee towls, right,
and you go, machines broken and you go why, and
you go the cottons all and the tied up in
the thing and you go why, and you go the
(01:02:53):
guy operating it he doesn't really know what he's doing.
Why And you're like, well, we haven't really trained him properly.
You go why, we're understaffed, and you go, cool, I'll
hire some more people. Yea, yeah, because you can spend
like all your time on the machine when it's a
staff problem. Right, So then like go back, like just
whiteboards are real cool. Hey, you know, like this is
(01:03:15):
crazy concept where you can just like write down what
you think and then like assess it.
Speaker 2 (01:03:19):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (01:03:20):
I try and do that a lot, and do a
lot of journaling and stuff and just be like I
don't because I get confused quite often. So I'll just
go I want to sell a show on Newcastle. How
well I'm going to have to get x amount of
people in there. How the answer is find out where
my people are, so for this show right now, I've
(01:03:42):
got a ad running in Singleton.
Speaker 2 (01:03:45):
Be perfect, right, That's what the military accommodation and stuff is.
Speaker 3 (01:03:51):
It says, jump on the train, get out a singer
for the weekend.
Speaker 2 (01:03:56):
Fuck, dude, that's so smart. It's simple smart, but it's simple,
but it's just like, but so fucking smart. Yeah, it's like,
how why are you trying to reinvent the fucking wheel
with all this other ship when it's just like it's
so simple? Yeah? Yeah, how yeah?
Speaker 3 (01:04:14):
And then like hopefully if I get more qualified and
just fail a bit more and figure out what doesn't
work and stuff, there might be two more hows past that, yeah,
until you're like, I think that that's I find that
really exciting. So if you guys would want to get
your Wednesday show really pumping, right, I would just figure
out what you want to do. I would write that
(01:04:36):
somewhere yep, and then I would attack it from that angle,
and then from that one, and then from that one
and then that one. I'll do the whys first. Why
don't I want to do this? Because the answer might
be I want to perform a solo show, and I
think this is how I'm going to get notoriety.
Speaker 2 (01:04:51):
Yeah. The why is actually like we want more clips
for like online cool, so we filmed the show, we can.
Speaker 3 (01:04:57):
Ask you another question.
Speaker 2 (01:04:58):
Yeah, why more clips to get like a Patreon rolling,
get fucking people following what we're doing. That sort of stuff.
Why it'll be sick, make money, make money? Yeah?
Speaker 3 (01:05:11):
Right, so now you go there, you go, cool, I
under same way. I want so I want to bring people.
I want to make a community because I know from
a community I can get Patreon Patreon, I can make money.
I'm assuming then you cannot. End goal is to do
this and not have another job, right, Yeah, so I
reckon if you went back, why enough, that's it?
Speaker 2 (01:05:28):
Yeah exactly. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (01:05:31):
So then it's like, well, why do I want to
do this? The answer is probably going to be because
it makes me happy?
Speaker 2 (01:05:38):
Yeah, And you go.
Speaker 3 (01:05:41):
How to be happy? How? How? Right? And then the
end the thing is you get to like talent show right,
and you go, I think this is the thing. All right,
let's fucking triple down on this because I've mapped it out.
And I think if we've got a path, and if
we follow the path and then figure out how long
(01:06:01):
it's going to take, Right, you go, I think if
we do this at this capacity, seven clips a week,
this many things, boom boom boom boom boom, this will
take us two years. Right then you go, wow, if
that's what it is, now, what does it look like
if I do three clips a week, goes to four,
but then scale it back the other way. What if
(01:06:21):
we're doing sixteen and you go, man, maybe there's and
then one gets lucky every now and then and you go, cool,
how do we do sixteen? You go, well, we need
to get people in with followings, and you go, cool,
all right, let's try and engage this person with like
one hundred thousand followers.
Speaker 2 (01:06:37):
It's like maybe a magician that's fucking already got a
following exactly.
Speaker 3 (01:06:40):
So then it's like growing, growing, growing, growing right, and
you start getting.
Speaker 2 (01:06:43):
The house right.
Speaker 3 (01:06:44):
It just it's like making fucking actual strategical moves to
be like, I've got time and effort, and if I
do too many things, I get tired. Yeah, And once
I get tired, I'm shit, I'm grumpy. I need to
go to sleep. So instead of doing those bug and
ten things a day, I'm just going to do really
well yeah, and I have more time. I'm going to
talk to people around me and I'm gonna have listen
(01:07:04):
to them and I'm gonna have general conversations like yeah.
Speaker 2 (01:07:06):
And it's like getting that data too, and it sucks
sometimes like having to go through that to like oh,
I'll fly it out in the street for like four
hours and fucking no and showed up to the show
and that sucked. And then you get a bit deflated
and you're like, all right, we'll run Facebook ads, and
you run Facebook ads, but you don't do it properly
and you're like failing and failing and failing. But like
I guess, like you were talking with the military, it's
(01:07:27):
just like that suck is better than like other stuff
that sucks, and I would rather keep doing that and
like practicing those different things and like figuring it out.
Speaker 3 (01:07:35):
And then never keep it to yourself. Yeah, don't fucking
figure something out that works and tell no one.
Speaker 2 (01:07:44):
Yeah, don't do that, Yeah.
Speaker 3 (01:07:46):
Because like everyone needs to know. Yeah, do you know why?
Because then they can move on to the next level
and start failing, right.
Speaker 2 (01:07:54):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (01:07:55):
And if you're the person that tells everyone what you've discovered,
then when they discover.
Speaker 2 (01:07:59):
Something, are going to tell you.
Speaker 3 (01:08:00):
I'll tell you. Oh fuck man, I've been doing all
this shit. Dude, can you save me six weeks? Cool?
Speaker 2 (01:08:07):
Yeah? Right.
Speaker 3 (01:08:07):
There will be some people that, oh, this is my
pie and I want my smaller part. I want this
part of my pie, or we can just grow the pie.
Speaker 1 (01:08:16):
Yeah, have more pie.
Speaker 3 (01:08:18):
Right, raises little ships, right, Yeah. And then like I
obviously am quite passionate and nerdy about this, right, I
like it, And I just try and tell everyone because
I'm like, I see some people that are really good
at comedy perform a no one. I'm like, dude, ads
and they're like, ah, and I'm like, maybe.
Speaker 2 (01:08:37):
I tried that didn't go well.
Speaker 3 (01:08:38):
I want people need to see this is real funny, man.
They joke about that.
Speaker 2 (01:08:41):
It's awesome.
Speaker 3 (01:08:42):
I wish you should go somewhere. Do it there because
they've got clips. Get a clip, yeah, clips. If you
can't do clips, figure out how to make clips. If
you can't make clips, figure out how to make enough
money to pay for someone to do clips.
Speaker 2 (01:08:53):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (01:08:54):
And it's all experienced as well, Like I uh, just
recently got a job.
Speaker 2 (01:09:00):
I was I'm glad of that. Fucking yeah.
Speaker 1 (01:09:02):
Man, it's fine, it's fine, man, It's I'm really fucking
happy about it because it's a really cool job. And
part of my experience with like dealing with Facebook ads
running like advertising and just talking about like some of
the little tiny, fucking one percent zero point one percent
of what I know and they're like, oh yeah, sweet,
(01:09:22):
that like that would actually transfer over into our business.
They're like cool, I'm like all right, sweet, like me
and Ethan actually fucking pretty good at making posters now,
like we're actually fucking like we're pretty good at making clips.
Ethan's very good at making clips. I should say, I'm
still kind of learning, but it's just like all of
(01:09:42):
that stuff, it's like, all right, sweet, you can use
that in other facets of life as well.
Speaker 3 (01:09:47):
You also have now skills now that can offer new value. Right,
So you go, all right, comedy festival, what a scam?
They make these problems and I solve and they sold
them for us a scam? Yeah, right, So now you
look at you and you go, oh, I've got this skill, right.
So then you start going out there and you go,
I got this footage, Hey, do you want to J
want me to cut up free clips for you for
like seventy five bucks? And they go I'd love that.
(01:10:08):
I fucking hate doing it and I don't know how,
right yeah, Or you go I've got these clips, do.
Speaker 2 (01:10:12):
You know how to make clips?
Speaker 3 (01:10:13):
And they go, nah, look I haven't really done it before,
and you go, do you want me to do it
for you. Yes, yeah, I mean even better if you
want to get full fucking entrepreneurial about it. You want
to be like, hey, do you want to do like
three sessions with me and I'll teach you how? Yeah,
four hundred dollars right.
Speaker 2 (01:10:27):
Yeah, And some people are like, fuck, no, dude, I
just want the clip.
Speaker 3 (01:10:30):
And then you go cool, here it is.
Speaker 2 (01:10:31):
But a lot of people will be like, no, I
want to learn.
Speaker 3 (01:10:34):
Imagine selling clips. Let's use seventy five dollars an example.
I'm going on tangent here, but I like it right
ten times a week?
Speaker 2 (01:10:43):
You're done, right, Yeah, that's like sweet, I can live
off that.
Speaker 3 (01:10:46):
And then you do the show yeah to sell clips?
Yeah right, and you go, don't worry about making money
on this, we're actually selling clips.
Speaker 2 (01:10:56):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (01:10:56):
So let's do three shows, all places, let's film them,
let's get the gear that we need, and let's just
make bookoo money selling clips. That is like a business model.
Whether you want to do that or not, I'm not
telling you should do it, but that's how you get
to start thinking, right. Or you go I need something
I need I need five hundred dollars to increase my career.
(01:11:20):
Like this, right. I hear a lot of people say that.
They're like, oh, I'd love to, but I don't. I
don't have the money.
Speaker 2 (01:11:25):
And you go how much you need?
Speaker 3 (01:11:26):
How much you need? They go, I need five hundred dollars.
You go, how are you going to make five hundred dollars?
They go, well, I guess I could do that. How
much you make from that fifty bucks? Or how are
you going to do that?
Speaker 2 (01:11:35):
Ten times?
Speaker 3 (01:11:37):
That doesn't affect your like your effort in that you
put into your career, right, And they go, well, I
could do. I could do. I've got equipment that I
only use once a month. Now are your equipment at
And then when you get that money, go to the
podcast studio and get everything you need to do the
thing that you love. Yeah, that's it, that's kind of
(01:11:59):
like that's kind of business, right, Yeah, that's what you
did go to do.
Speaker 2 (01:12:04):
Yeah, fude, that makes so much sense.
Speaker 3 (01:12:07):
But I started doing that a while ago. I was
Everyone kept taking me out for lunch. They're like, can
you go go wait, have fucking lunch, And I said,
I don't need lunch, bro, I'm pretty busy at the moment,
and they go, I'll give you two hundred bucks and
I said done, And I was like, I'll just I've
failed heaps. I was like, if you want to pay
me for the knowledge, I'm just sure.
Speaker 2 (01:12:24):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (01:12:25):
But then I just put that money away and then
I'm like, oh, just make content because I need more content.
And then you just go, well, I'm funding that through
the thing, and that's and that's cool, Like that's another.
Speaker 1 (01:12:35):
How how how how It's also about like when you're like,
so you've seen you've seen my set, you've seen me.
Speaker 2 (01:12:44):
We performed a.
Speaker 1 (01:12:47):
Yeah, but like I've got a full time job. My
full time job pays the bills at the moment, so
my comedy money is literally just like all right, sweet,
we that money gets put aside and then it gets
reinvested into comedy. Like if we need gear, if we've
got to buy stuff, like if we're running ads, it's like,
(01:13:09):
all right, sweet, I got fucking I was very fortunate
this week. I've had an mt spot and I've had
two I've got booked for the weekend, so like we're fucking,
you know, up two hundred and fifty bucks for the
week Cool? What gear do we need? We need another light?
I got to buy some drugs for my wife's thirtieth.
But apart from that, we're fucking sweet. And then the
(01:13:30):
rest of it goes into the little kiddie and then
I've got cash.
Speaker 3 (01:13:33):
There, and we'll take that idea and go one further. Right,
you want to open a cafe costs four and a
grad six hundred thousand dollars, right, million if you want
a good fit out, staff, machines, stock, all this sort
of stuff. Okay, you don't wait until you have a
million dollars to open the cafe, because you're like, if
we make a hundred thousand years, it's ten years will
(01:13:55):
be ahead. Right, So what do you do instead?
Speaker 2 (01:13:58):
Get alone, get a.
Speaker 3 (01:13:58):
Fucking low you invest, you get debt to invest in
your future, and you go, I think if I get
a million dollar thing, You're like, I'm gonna have to
pay one point whatever.
Speaker 1 (01:14:09):
Fuck you other guy, Right, yeah, but.
Speaker 3 (01:14:12):
I can serve us that loan and then in the
end we can sell it off for like two million dollars.
But we've made an income along the way.
Speaker 2 (01:14:17):
Yeah. Right, this is a business.
Speaker 3 (01:14:21):
So you could be like, you could think about this
in one way, right, and you're like, what would I
need to tour Australia. You're like, I'm going to need
a fucking massive car and I'm going to need an
equipment and all that sort of stuff. Ah Man, that
costs forty thousand dollars. You're like, I could do a
lot of gigs until I get forty thousand dollars. Or
you can get a loan that you pay back for
one hundred and thirty dollars a fucking fortnight. Yeah, and
(01:14:43):
you can start living your fucking dream, right, because transfer
forward when you're seventy five years of age, right, and
you're sitting around with some other motherfucker that didn't live
his job, like his life dream, and he's complaining about X,
Y and Z and this is a scam and that's
everything and all that sort of stuff, and you just
like time travel there and you talk to your old
self and you go, well, do you reckon if you
(01:15:04):
just got like a fifty grand loan, what'd your life
look like? Would that be worth it?
Speaker 2 (01:15:10):
Yeah? The answer is yes, Yeah, it's like roll the
fucking dice.
Speaker 1 (01:15:14):
It's also people get the fifty grand loan instead of
spending it on the fucking thing that they got the
loan for. They're like, ah, fuck it, let's go out
for dinner tonight.
Speaker 2 (01:15:23):
Let's fuck That is like the best advice for someone
who has their head screwed on.
Speaker 3 (01:15:26):
Yeah, but that is the price you pay to roll
the fucking dice, right, That is the price you pay
for being in the arena and not in the stands. Yes,
it's like, you want to be in the stands, Go
do fucking stand shit, be safe, to be a fucking
normal human being, Get a job where where whatever they
tell you to do a thing, or figure out what
your life wants to be like, and go get it.
(01:15:49):
And if that includes taking a risk, it's the price
you pay for being in the arena, dude.
Speaker 1 (01:15:54):
One of the craziest things yesterday and I had someone
I spoke to someone and spend their entire entire life
on the doll don't work. But they had nearly six
hundred thousand dollars and they're like, oh, like I'm looking
(01:16:15):
for like looking to invest or whatever.
Speaker 2 (01:16:18):
I'm like, okay, Like what's your income.
Speaker 1 (01:16:20):
They're like, oh, six hundred bucks a fortnite because I've
got all this money, like that's all the government will
give me. And I'm like, all right, cool, let's just
like punch in the interest calculator. I was like, how
much you're going to earn on this money per month?
And I was like, Oh, you're actually going to earn
like fifteen hundred dollars a month in interest of this
money right there. I was like, you'll actually earn more
(01:16:43):
money on interest on that than you will on the
doll and they're like oh, And I was like, it's cool,
it's great, and we'd love to have your business, but
I've already resigned. So I was like, go call three
financial advisors. I said, because that's the sort of money
that is life changing. I said, if I had that money,
(01:17:05):
I would kind of be able to set myself up.
I'd be able to do with that money. I would
be able to pay all my bills, I would have
a place to live, and I would never have to
worry about food. And I said, and there's people who
are way smarter than me. He can give you way
better advice and do ten times what I could do
with my base knowledge. And I already know what I
(01:17:26):
can do with that money. So I said, just get
as soon as you get off the phone to me,
call three different financial advisors. Tell them how much money
you're going to have and get some and fucking go
out there, I said, because you can set yourself up.
I said, because what's it doing now? I said, Are
you're just spending it?
Speaker 2 (01:17:42):
She goes yeah.
Speaker 1 (01:17:43):
I said, yeah, you're just like I said, the trap
that you people fall in with money is they nickel
and die themselves. They slowly cut into it and they're
not doing anything with the money. And I said, and
then you get family, I said, if you've got it
invested and family come to you for money, I was like,
you can't touch you because it's in the fun.
Speaker 2 (01:18:01):
There's no way that you shouldn't be getting at least
ten percent on that, which you could easily at the moment.
You get five hundred grand of that away. Yeah, and
then you've got one hundred grand of fuck you money.
You've got five hundred grand at ten percent, that's like
fifty grand a year. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (01:18:17):
It's like that person's like, but sooner later, you got
to figure out what you want to do with your life, right, Yeah,
but what do you want to do with it?
Speaker 2 (01:18:23):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (01:18:23):
Because someone was around in the year eleven fifteen who
you've never heard of.
Speaker 2 (01:18:30):
They didn't have any options yeah.
Speaker 3 (01:18:32):
Right, and like, guess what, in one hundred and fifty years,
no one fucking knows you were here, me included. Even
if it goes well, I sawt Like you see celebrities
die every now and then, and if they're not huge
and they're just kind of people that have achieved fucking
heaps but not superstarsh twenty four hours of fucking minimal,
they're like, oh, that guy that was on that show
(01:18:53):
passed away.
Speaker 2 (01:18:54):
Yeah he was on a show.
Speaker 3 (01:18:56):
I'm not on a show. Yeah he was achieved amazing thing. Right,
they've read high in one hundred years, you nobody, right,
So you've got to figure out what you want to do. Yeah,
and then like have that conversation with you at ninety, like, hey,
did you like, like, I'm pretty in on comedy and
I'm making fucking minimal cash, right, but it's getting there.
Speaker 2 (01:19:18):
Yeah, I could be at the top of the potential.
Speaker 3 (01:19:21):
I could be, but I could be at the peak.
I don't know, and you never do.
Speaker 2 (01:19:26):
Right, It's all cool.
Speaker 3 (01:19:27):
I'll be downhill from here, right, But if I fast
forward ward at ninety and be like, hey, Jared, like,
do you even regret like spending that seven to sort
of fifteen years trying to do comedy. I know what
the answer is. Yeah, I know what the answer is.
Speaker 2 (01:19:39):
It's not going to be. No. I wish I had
a sat at a fucking nine to five totally. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (01:19:44):
Think about the path that you haven't taken, yeah, or
the one that you currently are. Be like, oh, could
I just fucking suck at something else? Yeah? Yeah, and
you might figure it.
Speaker 2 (01:19:55):
Out, which is there's nothing wrong with doing the nine
to five. If you want to be mister family and
kids and and all that shit, Oh do it.
Speaker 3 (01:20:01):
It's do one hundred and twenty percent goal.
Speaker 2 (01:20:03):
That's the goal. That's the goal. That's the goal.
Speaker 3 (01:20:05):
But then go the back. Why on that the way?
It's like, oh I really like it. That makes me happy. Yeah,
I fucking have seventeen kids can't enjoy it. Yeah, Like
I love that stuff so much. Yeah, you don't have
No one has to be anything. You just got to
be what you want to be exactly.
Speaker 2 (01:20:16):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (01:20:17):
Like that's that's the whole thing.
Speaker 1 (01:20:18):
Yeah, because at the end of that, there's going to
be one day when you're fucking lying on your bed
and you've got the people that care about you around you,
and you're going to be looking back on it, or
you're going to die, and you get to meet that
dude in between here and there wherever there is, and
(01:20:38):
he's gone back through and you're going through all your
regrets because that's what happens because they've had they've had
people revived and they're like, what happened to Like, I
feel really bad because I've been shitty to all of
these people.
Speaker 3 (01:20:51):
I wish i'd both the piano.
Speaker 1 (01:20:52):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly, Like I always fucking look back
on it.
Speaker 2 (01:20:56):
I'm like, I'll hear.
Speaker 1 (01:20:59):
I was listening to podcast on the way here with
Craig Jones, and I started jiu jitsu when I was
like eighteen, but I've just been I was just too inconsistent,
and I pick it up for like a couple of
months and then I fall off. And it's been twelve
thirteen years, and I'm like, fuck, i'd have been a
black belt by now. I'd have been a fucking black
(01:21:21):
belt by now, and now I'm too fat to do it.
I'm too old to do it.
Speaker 3 (01:21:27):
Yeah, but you're right.
Speaker 1 (01:21:29):
If I fucking if I turn around and I get
back into it, I'm like, I'll be forty two and
I'll be a black belt, but I'll still be a
fucking black belt or.
Speaker 3 (01:21:38):
Or yeah, or you don't yeah, and you still want
to and then when you're forty two, you go. Fuck.
I wish I did it that day after the podcast. Yeah,
because like time's linear, right, Yeah, you're going to get
there eventually, they get there.
Speaker 2 (01:21:52):
Clicker now because the time's shorter. Yeah, oh do you
get the quicker it goes? Yeah, exactly. I feel like
you're a black belt even faster. Yeahd motivation, do tomorrow today.
Speaker 3 (01:22:01):
That's just I heard something I heard recently, and I
do do do something today that tomorrow you will thank
you for.
Speaker 2 (01:22:08):
Yeah. Yeah. My whole last year of like this fucked
up relationship I was in was just so much of that,
like putting shit off that I was supposed to be
doing and like just getting this van finished, like it
just completely all progress in my life just fucking stopped
for like a year and a half. It was crazy.
I was like I can't even really like write properly,
(01:22:29):
Like my brain is just in such a fucking survival
state that like this is all fucked and then and
now coming out of it, I'm just like I'm just
slowly clawing my way back, just like holy fuck, yeah, yeah,
how what are you? Thirty two?
Speaker 3 (01:22:41):
What do you want to be? How do you want
to think when you're forty two? What do you want
to be? Look back on that ten years and be
like hell yeah, Like what would that be for you?
Speaker 2 (01:22:50):
Just like, first thing I want to do is get
this van done, start driving around the country doing.
Speaker 3 (01:22:56):
I'm talking to you. You're forty two years of age.
How was your last ten years? What you're most proud of?
Speaker 2 (01:23:02):
Well, whatever progress I've made?
Speaker 3 (01:23:05):
Yes, I would then how many days are in ten years?
Speaker 1 (01:23:09):
Three six hundred and fifty plus leap years?
Speaker 3 (01:23:13):
I wonder you out if you figured out what you
wanted to do, divided that by three thousand things, Yeah,
that'll give you exactly what you need to do every day.
Speaker 1 (01:23:23):
You tell I work at a bank. I'm pretty fucking smart, guys,
I can multiply by ten.
Speaker 3 (01:23:36):
The amazing saying with writers is the old thing with
writers is you want to be a writer, write a
million words, then you're ready to start. Yeah yeah, dude,
So like, whatever your thing is you want to do,
figure out what your million words is, and they just
start doing that.
Speaker 2 (01:23:49):
Even having comedy is like a thing that like, oh,
this is what I want to do. Is you're already
ninety percent ahead of so many other people that are
just working and I don't know what I'm doing one.
Speaker 3 (01:24:00):
And I'm also just the word. I'm also just as
baseline fighting. I'm not exceptional. I just that's the that's
the difference.
Speaker 2 (01:24:09):
Is I could never do that. Yes you could, Yeah
you can. You can like yeah it's just me bro
Yeah yeah yeah crazy.
Speaker 3 (01:24:18):
But yeah that's what I mean. But but then now
I can get to do what I want.
Speaker 2 (01:24:21):
Yeah, I didn't.
Speaker 3 (01:24:23):
Do this because I want to do big good at ads. Right,
that was just one of the things I had to
figure out to do the thing that I liked. Yes,
because that's what I want to do with my life
and it makes me happy. And when I'm old, I
want to be like But that was the best for time. Man,
it was so funny and this happened, and have will
be really interesting and have a sharp mind because I've
lived a fulfilled life. Yeah, if that meant I had
(01:24:45):
to watch fifteen YouTube videos about meta data, that's a
good price to pay. Yeah, that's a really really simple price.
Speaker 2 (01:24:53):
And that is actually a very simple thing that like,
I guess it's it's hard to because there's so much
like bullshit out there as well. Like if you if
you had a goal like oh, I want to grow
my Instagram followers, and then you like type that in,
you're just going to get like a heap of ads,
a heap of shit of like people trying to sell
you the wrong fucking thing scam. You'll also have to
be able to discern and fucking way through the bullshit
to be like, all right, this is actually good, like
(01:25:14):
this will actually work.
Speaker 3 (01:25:16):
On my journey to find out how to get people
to come to my comedy show. I just had to
get like fake like people. I just went through the bullshit.
I still watch the videos and then I got to
the end I went, oh na, this is crap. Yeah,
but like I wasn't to be able to get to
the good stuff that made the breakthrough my mind to
make the connection without I bombed. I bombed it learning.
Speaker 2 (01:25:39):
Yeah right, that's fine, just what happens.
Speaker 3 (01:25:42):
Yeah, just bomb its side.
Speaker 2 (01:25:43):
And there's people that have bought Instagram followers that I know.
It's like, well that's you can shit on them for it.
But you're like that person was trying to fucking do
something together, like they'll give them a shot. Yeah, it's
the wrong fucking thing to do, and like you had
to learn the hard way that that's not going to
sell tickets to you show. But they fucking gave it
a crack. Yeah it didn't work. Fucking try something else.
Speaker 3 (01:26:05):
They should tell everyone about that.
Speaker 2 (01:26:07):
Yeah. Yeah, that's the thing with failure. It's kind of like, oh,
we'll chuck that under the rug, and.
Speaker 3 (01:26:13):
Oh I would be so cool. I was so cool
and impressed if I saw someone on camera two camera
being like, so I bought two thousand Instagram followers and
this is what it did to my account in my career. Yeah,
that's the hook, right, Yeah, I went there. It cost
me this much. I found out this. I had to
go do that. A better solution would be boom. But
try not get thirty thousand years on that video.
Speaker 2 (01:26:32):
Oh yeah yeah, yeah, that's a clip right there. I
bought two thousand.
Speaker 3 (01:26:37):
Don't do it for me because it sounds like I
did it.
Speaker 1 (01:26:44):
All right, man, thank you so much coming on out
of it.
Speaker 3 (01:26:47):
I hope it didn't sound too pompous. If anyone's listening
and you're like this guy's a fuckhead. I was really
passionate about it.
Speaker 2 (01:26:53):
I've never heard like be like this guy doesn't know
what he's talking about. Was my ex girlfriend. I was
in the car with her and I fucking lost my ship.
What are you talking about? You don't know sharing fucking knowledge.
I lost my ship. But she was just a fucking
hater trying to get and she got the reaction my
fucking bit.
Speaker 3 (01:27:12):
Yeah. Yeah, I just really passion about It's interesting. I
find it, I find it cool. It's final statement is
that we're not comedians. We've got to do show biz.
And there's two parts of show bits, the show and
the biz and the bits. Yeah, get get good at
both and life gets easier. Yeah, that's that's the main thing.
(01:27:32):
It gets easier because because it's always hard, so you
shouldn't have to be run start there. Yeah, but thanks
having me.
Speaker 2 (01:27:38):
I really appreciate it.
Speaker 1 (01:27:39):
Ye, have you got any shows coming up to plug?
Obviously you're doing shows this weekend, but the podcast will
be out next week.
Speaker 3 (01:27:44):
I don't know if that is a message or something what.
I don't know. If you liked it, or you've got
other questions or something, feel free to send me a
message or something.
Speaker 1 (01:27:50):
I don't really care, but yeah, with your Instagram.
Speaker 3 (01:27:53):
Just my name Jared Gwandry. Yeah, just gives a like
I mean. And then the final, final, final, final thing
is we live in a world of algorithms, right, and
this is something I try and do nearly all the time. Right.
If you see someone that you like doing something, putting
themselves out there and making something that you know is difficult,
(01:28:15):
the best way you can help them is to just
watch it and let it run through. You don't even
have You can put the sound out and put it
next to you, right. If I see some of my friends,
just go I put a sound out clip at I
go double tap yep, and just let it run. Yeah,
because like the world is full of like good. Karma's
(01:28:36):
thing a real thing. I think. You don't manifest what
you want. You manifest who you are. And if you're
a good person that helps out your friends, you just
don't know when you need them.
Speaker 2 (01:28:46):
Yeah, exactly, dude. Yeah, it'll comes around totally. Yeah, the
shit and the good.
Speaker 3 (01:28:51):
I don't need anything from anyone listening.
Speaker 2 (01:28:52):
There's just just enjoy it and thanks. Man.
Speaker 3 (01:28:54):
If you didn't like it, don't talk to me about
it because I honestly.
Speaker 2 (01:28:58):
Don't need that.
Speaker 3 (01:28:59):
That's a real negative energy.
Speaker 2 (01:29:00):
If you don't, I will fight with you in the car.
I will scream at you.
Speaker 3 (01:29:03):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (01:29:03):
I know a little bit of jiu jitsu too, so
he did. That's a funny guy. Thank you very much
to cheers.