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July 3, 2025 28 mins

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 Episode 65 of "I Hate Talking" centers on the word "cogitate" and continues the discussion about parallel play.

  • The hosts introduce and explore the word "cogitate," which means to think deeply about something, tracing its Latin roots and comparing it with "meditate." They note that while both words involve deep thought, "cogitate" implies active, problem-focused thinking, whereas "meditate" often connotes relaxation or contemplation without a specific goal.
  • The hosts discuss how "meditate" is more commonly used in modern English, while "cogitate" is rare and might be misunderstood if used in conversation. They highlight the nuanced differences between these terms, rooted in their Latin origins, and suggest that "cogitate" might be a more precise word in some contexts.
  • They reference their experiences with meditation apps and how some people (including their children) find guided meditation challenging because it encourages specific thoughts rather than mental relaxation—highlighting the difference between the two concepts.
  • The conversation shifts to biblical usage, examining whether scriptural references to "meditate" might be closer in meaning to "cogitate," especially in passages encouraging focused reflection. They look at Greek and Hebrew roots and note that biblical "meditation" often means to ponder or contemplate deeply.


  • Returning to parallel play, the hosts reflect on their ongoing debate. One host, despite being sick, shares two conclusions after "cogitating" on the topic:
    • Strict parallel play means being in the same space but doing completely separate activities, with no interaction—even brief conversation breaks the definition.
    • Time-bounded parallel play might suit both their needs better: agreeing to a set period to do separate activities together, after which they can interact or move on. This structure could help balance their differing preferences.
  • The co-host acknowledges being a people pleaser, which makes relaxing during parallel play difficult, as she feels responsible for others' comfort and happiness.

Key themes:

  • The subtle but important distinction between "cogitate" and "meditate."
  • The challenges of practicing parallel play as adults, especially when personalities and expectations differ.
  • The value of clear definitions and boundaries—both for language and for shared activities like parallel play.

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Any views expressed on this podcast are those solely of the hosts and is for entertainment purposes only. None of the content is medical advice or financial advice.

Special thanks to Tim Wright aka CoLD SToRAGE for his permission to use the song Operatique.

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