Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Brittany (00:00):
Hey mama.
(00:03):
Welcome to the Inside Out Mamaspodcast.
I'm Brittany Turley, mom of six,and I know what it's like to
feel stuck and overwhelmedtrying to be the perfect mom,
but everything changed for mewhen I learned that small
changes on the inside can bringbig results on the outside.
Each week I will share simple,yet powerful inside shifts or
(00:25):
outside tips that can transformyour approach to mothering,
helping you thrive from theinside out.
Ready to ditch the mom guilt andenjoy this season of life.
You are in the right place.
The anticipation of plantingseeds with the dreams that you
(00:45):
will grow something I think isso fun.
I planted my lettuce outsidethis week and I planted my
pepper and tomato seeds in traysto grow inside this week, and
I'm already thinking about thedelicious salad I will get to
enjoy this summer.
So what does this have to dowith motherhood?
(01:07):
You might think, well, what ifwe look at our thoughts as
seeds?
What if we think of our thoughtsas seeds that we could
purposefully plant in the groundin anticipation of growing
something wonderful to enjoylater?
Let's take a look at seeds tohelp us understand how this
(01:29):
could be.
Seeds contain three things.
An embryo or the baby plant, afood supply to help the embryo
grow at first and a protectiveouter coat.
We could look at the embryo asour thought and the food supply
inside the seed as evidence thatour brain finds to support our
(01:55):
thoughts.
And then the protective coat onthe seed is us protecting our
thought, even when new evidencecomes our way.
Now as you think about thoughtseeds, think about what thought
seeds you have already plantedfor your kids.
You might have already plantedthoughts like, my kid is smart,
(02:16):
or My kid is funny, or My kid issensitive, or My kid is shy, or
my kid is hyper, or my kid ismean.
You probably think those thingsbecause you have found good
evidence to support it, and youprotect that because you see the
evidence that you have found.
Let's say you have a thoughtthat your kid is smart.
(02:40):
The embryo part of that seed isyour thought that your kid is
smart.
The food supply inside that seedis the evidence that you have
found, like they're gettingstraight A's in school.
And the protective outer coat isyou believing that they're
smart.
Now, if you think your child issmart and they do something you
(03:00):
think is not smart, then you areshocked.
Whereas another child that youdon't think is as smart could do
the same thing and you're notshocked.
This is your protective layerworking.
You will usually reject any kindof evidence against your thought
and say, well, that justhappened because of this or it's
(03:21):
just a fluke because you reallydo believe that they're smart.
I went to college for a degreein elementary education and to
finish up that degree, I had todo student teaching.
The first experience I hadstudent teaching there was a
student in the class namedKapono.
It was clear to me that theteacher already had some thought
(03:44):
seeds about Kapono when I gotthere.
She thought that he was naughtyand unable to learn.
She had found evidence tosupport her thought and believed
it was a fact.
She clearly didn't believe hewas capable of learning or
behaving, and the way that sheinteracted with him and the way
that she responded to himsupported that.
(04:06):
Luckily, being new and freshwith energy and ideas from
college, I saw thingsdifferently.
When I looked at Kapono, I sawthat he was capable of behaving
and I believed that he wascapable of learning.
He did need a few adjustments tohelp him accomplish those
things, but I soon discoveredthat he actually loved learning
(04:28):
when given the chance.
The teacher's thoughts aboutKapono prevented her from seeing
him in any other way, and itprevented her from teaching him.
But because I had differentthoughts about him, I could see
him differently and I could helphim.
The next classroom that Istudent taught in.
The teacher had a very differentapproach than my first teacher.
(04:52):
She had thought seeds that allof her students were smart and
well-behaved.
She would often say that theseare the best students, and I'm
fairly certain that she saidthat to every class every year.
This is what she chose to thinkand believe, and this is why her
students really thrived.
The difference between these twoteachers was very stark and the
(05:16):
interesting thing was is it wasreally just the thoughts that
they were having that made themvery different.
They were both very capable,well-trained teachers, but the
first teacher was allowing herthoughts that weren't serving
her student to direct herbehaviors, and in turn, her
(05:37):
student did not thrive.
Now as a gardener, after youplant your seeds, you mark them
with like a little tag stuck inthe ground that you've written
on so that you know what youplanted, where you planted them,
so you don't forget what it wasyou planted there, and so you
don't.
Dig it up unintentionally orplant something else over the
top of it, we give the seedspace it needs to grow.
(06:02):
The marker is us saying, I'msetting aside space for this
purpose, and I have anexpectation that this will grow
here.
We can do the same thing withour thought seeds as we plant
them and mark them, makingmental space for them and
mentally saying, this is what Iintend to grow here, and setting
that expectation.
(06:23):
Now if you just plant a seed andthen forget about it, maybe it
will grow or maybe it won't.
Seeds generally require a littlemore attention.
They have to have constantmoisture on them.
They need sunlight and some needwarm climates.
For example, the peppers andtomatoes I planted inside, not
(06:43):
only need water and grow lights,but they have to have a heat mat
underneath them to grow well.
I grow seeds indoors so that Ican put them outdoors as a plant
and enjoy what otherwisewouldn't thrive in my climate
because the growing season istoo short for them to get much
fruit before the frost comesagain.
(07:03):
If we take these two ideas ofmarking and nurturing your seeds
and apply them to, my examplewith the teachers, the second
teacher that had the seeds thather students were smart and
well-behaved, not only did sheplant the seeds and believe
them.
But she took it to the next twosteps.
She marked them and nurturedthose seeds.
(07:25):
She told the kids they weresmart.
She told them they werewell-behaved, and she provided a
space where those seeds couldgrow into strong plants.
Because all her interactions andher lessons were grounded on
those beliefs that her studentswere smart and well-behaved.
She taught in a very differentway because of the way she
(07:45):
thought about her students.
The two examples with my studentteaching teachers show us that
it's beneficial for us and ourkids when we purposefully choose
what seeds we will plant andnourish.
I don't think my first teacherpurposefully planted her seeds,
but she didn't purposefullyplant.
(08:06):
Any other seeds.
So how can we purposefully plantthought seeds?
First, pick a thought seed youwant to plant something you
think will benefit your child oryou or your relationship with
them.
An example could be that youwant to set the thought seed
that your child is good atcleaning up after themselves.
(08:28):
The next step is to figure outhow you can market and make an
intentional space for it.
In your mind.
Set the expectation that youwill help this grow and believe
it.
For example, to mark the thoughtseed that your child is good at
cleaning up after themselves.
You could put a note that youwill see to remind you each day
(08:49):
of your thought seed.
On the note, maybe you onlywrite the word clean or you draw
a broom, some sort of code sothat no one else will know what
it means, but it reminds you.
Then think about how you willnurture with water and light
your thought seed.
You want to add evidence thatsupports your thought.
(09:10):
For example, to nurture thethought that your child is good
at cleaning up.
You could compliment your childwhen you see them picking up a
toy that they dropped.
You might think the seed I wantto plant is going to be
impossible to nurture becauseit's probably something that we
haven't seen a lot of because wehaven't planted that seed.
(09:30):
But remember, it doesn't matterhow small the action is, it is
your nurturing that matters.
When you are purposefullylooking for something, you will
most often find it, and lots oftimes it's in ways you never
expected or in places you neverthought to look.
So don't give up if you thinkthat it will be impossible to
(09:51):
nurture your seed.
Just give the process a try andyou will be surprised.
So what do you want to plant foryour kids this spring?
You get to choose now because Ibelieve small changes on the
inside bring big results on theoutside.
Each week on my podcast, I'mgoing to give you a small change
(10:14):
challenge, something small youcan do throughout the week if
you choose, that could end upbringing big results to your
life.
The small change challenge forthis week is to pick one thought
seed about one of your childrenthat you are going to grow
purposefully this week.
decide how you will mark it, andhow you will nurture it.
(10:35):
I can't wait for you to see whatamazing things will grow.
Thank you for joining me foranother episode of Inside Out
Mamas.
My hope is that our timetogether inspires more feelings
of peace, confidence, and joy inyour mama journey.
Be sure to subscribe so younever miss a show.
And if you're ready to takethese insights even deeper, head
(10:57):
over to brittany turleycoaching.com to check out my
digital workshop.
Designed to help you reducedaily mom overwhelm without
adding to your to-do list.
Thanks for listening.
And remember, small changes onthe inside, bring big results on
the outside.
Hey mama.
(00:03):
Welcome to the Inside Out Mamaspodcast.
I'm Brittany Turley, mom of six,and I know what it's like to
feel stuck and overwhelmedtrying to be the perfect mom,
but everything changed for mewhen I learned that small
changes on the inside can bringbig results on the outside.
Each week I will share simple,yet powerful inside shifts or
(00:25):
outside tips that can transformyour approach to mothering,
helping you thrive from theinside out.
Ready to ditch the mom guilt andenjoy this season of life.
You are in the right place.
The anticipation of plantingseeds with the dreams that you
(00:45):
will grow something I think isso fun.
I planted my lettuce outsidethis week and I planted my
pepper and tomato seeds in traysto grow inside this week, and
I'm already thinking about thedelicious salad I will get to
enjoy this summer.
So what does this have to dowith motherhood?
(01:07):
You might think, well, what ifwe look at our thoughts as
seeds?
What if we think of our thoughtsas seeds that we could
purposefully plant in the groundin anticipation of growing
something wonderful to enjoylater?
Let's take a look at seeds tohelp us understand how this
(01:29):
could be.
Seeds contain three things.
An embryo or the baby plant, afood supply to help the embryo
grow at first and a protectiveouter coat.
We could look at the embryo asour thought and the food supply
inside the seed as evidence thatour brain finds to support our
(01:55):
thoughts.
And then the protective coat onthe seed is us protecting our
thought, even when new evidencecomes our way.
Now as you think about thoughtseeds, think about what thought
seeds you have already plantedfor your kids.
You might have already plantedthoughts like, my kid is smart,
(02:16):
or My kid is funny, or My kid issensitive, or My kid is shy, or
my kid is hyper, or my kid ismean.
You probably think those thingsbecause you have found good
evidence to support it, and youprotect that because you see the
evidence that you have found.
Let's say you have a thoughtthat your kid is smart.
(02:40):
The embryo part of that seed isyour thought that your kid is
smart.
The food supply inside that seedis the evidence that you have
found, like they're gettingstraight A's in school.
And the protective outer coat isyou believing that they're
smart.
Now, if you think your child issmart and they do something you
(03:00):
think is not smart, then you areshocked.
Whereas another child that youdon't think is as smart could do
the same thing and you're notshocked.
This is your protective layerworking.
You will usually reject any kindof evidence against your thought
and say, well, that justhappened because of this or it's
(03:21):
just a fluke because you reallydo believe that they're smart.
I went to college for a degreein elementary education and to
finish up that degree, I had todo student teaching.
The first experience I hadstudent teaching there was a
student in the class namedKapono.
It was clear to me that theteacher already had some thought
(03:44):
seeds about Kapono when I gotthere.
She thought that he was naughtyand unable to learn.
She had found evidence tosupport her thought and believed
it was a fact.
She clearly didn't believe hewas capable of learning or
behaving, and the way that sheinteracted with him and the way
that she responded to himsupported that.
(04:06):
Luckily, being new and freshwith energy and ideas from
college, I saw thingsdifferently.
When I looked at Kapono, I sawthat he was capable of behaving
and I believed that he wascapable of learning.
He did need a few adjustments tohelp him accomplish those
things, but I soon discoveredthat he actually loved learning
(04:28):
when given the chance.
The teacher's thoughts aboutKapono prevented her from seeing
him in any other way, and itprevented her from teaching him.
But because I had differentthoughts about him, I could see
him differently and I could helphim.
The next classroom that Istudent taught in.
The teacher had a very differentapproach than my first teacher.
(04:52):
She had thought seeds that allof her students were smart and
well-behaved.
She would often say that theseare the best students, and I'm
fairly certain that she saidthat to every class every year.
This is what she chose to thinkand believe, and this is why her
students really thrived.
The difference between these twoteachers was very stark and the
(05:16):
interesting thing was is it wasreally just the thoughts that
they were having that made themvery different.
They were both very capable,well-trained teachers, but the
first teacher was allowing herthoughts that weren't serving
her student to direct herbehaviors, and in turn, her
(05:37):
student did not thrive.
Now as a gardener, after youplant your seeds, you mark them
with like a little tag stuck inthe ground that you've written
on so that you know what youplanted, where you planted them,
so you don't forget what it wasyou planted there, and so you
don't.
Dig it up unintentionally orplant something else over the
top of it, we give the seedspace it needs to grow.
(06:02):
The marker is us saying, I'msetting aside space for this
purpose, and I have anexpectation that this will grow
here.
We can do the same thing withour thought seeds as we plant
them and mark them, makingmental space for them and
mentally saying, this is what Iintend to grow here, and setting
that expectation.
(06:23):
Now if you just plant a seed andthen forget about it, maybe it
will grow or maybe it won't.
Seeds generally require a littlemore attention.
They have to have constantmoisture on them.
They need sunlight and some needwarm climates.
For example, the peppers andtomatoes I planted inside, not
(06:43):
only need water and grow lights,but they have to have a heat mat
underneath them to grow well.
I grow seeds indoors so that Ican put them outdoors as a plant
and enjoy what otherwisewouldn't thrive in my climate
because the growing season istoo short for them to get much
fruit before the frost comesagain.
(07:03):
If we take these two ideas ofmarking and nurturing your seeds
and apply them to, my examplewith the teachers, the second
teacher that had the seeds thather students were smart and
well-behaved, not only did sheplant the seeds and believe
them.
But she took it to the next twosteps.
She marked them and nurturedthose seeds.
(07:25):
She told the kids they weresmart.
She told them they werewell-behaved, and she provided a
space where those seeds couldgrow into strong plants.
Because all her interactions andher lessons were grounded on
those beliefs that her studentswere smart and well-behaved.
She taught in a very differentway because of the way she
(07:45):
thought about her students.
The two examples with my studentteaching teachers show us that
it's beneficial for us and ourkids when we purposefully choose
what seeds we will plant andnourish.
I don't think my first teacherpurposefully planted her seeds,
but she didn't purposefullyplant.
(08:06):
Any other seeds.
So how can we purposefully plantthought seeds?
First, pick a thought seed youwant to plant something you
think will benefit your child oryou or your relationship with
them.
An example could be that youwant to set the thought seed
that your child is good atcleaning up after themselves.
(08:28):
The next step is to figure outhow you can market and make an
intentional space for it.
In your mind.
Set the expectation that youwill help this grow and believe
it.
For example, to mark the thoughtseed that your child is good at
cleaning up after themselves.
You could put a note that youwill see to remind you each day
(08:49):
of your thought seed.
On the note, maybe you onlywrite the word clean or you draw
a broom, some sort of code sothat no one else will know what
it means, but it reminds you.
Then think about how you willnurture with water and light
your thought seed.
You want to add evidence thatsupports your thought.
(09:10):
For example, to nurture thethought that your child is good
at cleaning up.
You could compliment your childwhen you see them picking up a
toy that they dropped.
You might think the seed I wantto plant is going to be
impossible to nurture becauseit's probably something that we
haven't seen a lot of because wehaven't planted that seed.
(09:30):
But remember, it doesn't matterhow small the action is, it is
your nurturing that matters.
When you are purposefullylooking for something, you will
most often find it, and lots oftimes it's in ways you never
expected or in places you neverthought to look.
So don't give up if you thinkthat it will be impossible to
(09:51):
nurture your seed.
Just give the process a try andyou will be surprised.
So what do you want to plant foryour kids this spring?
You get to choose now because Ibelieve small changes on the
inside bring big results on theoutside.
Each week on my podcast, I'mgoing to give you a small change
(10:14):
challenge, something small youcan do throughout the week if
you choose, that could end upbringing big results to your
life.
The small change challenge forthis week is to pick one thought
seed about one of your childrenthat you are going to grow
purposefully this week.
decide how you will mark it, andhow you will nurture it.
(10:35):
I can't wait for you to see whatamazing things will grow.
Thank you for joining me foranother episode of Inside Out
Mamas.
My hope is that our timetogether inspires more feelings
of peace, confidence, and joy inyour mama journey.
Be sure to subscribe so younever miss a show.
And if you're ready to takethese insights even deeper, head
(10:57):
over to brittany turleycoaching.com to check out my
digital workshop.
Designed to help you reducedaily mom overwhelm without
adding to your to-do list.
Thanks for listening.
And remember, small changes onthe inside, bring big results on
the outside.
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