Rewire Your Inner Voice

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Your body is throwing an emergency brake while you're still trying to climb uphill—that's burnout. And the most alarming part? Most women don't realize they're experiencing burnout until their bodies physically force them to stop.

Burnout isn't a badge of honor or a sign that you're working hard enough. It's a clear signal that your nervous system has been running a marathon without water breaks. 

The good news? Healing from burnout doesn't require adding more to your already overwhelming schedule. Forget the three-hour morning routines and complicated self-care regimens. 

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Episode Transcript

Emily Feist (00:00):
Burnout isn't just about being a little tired.
It's your body throwing anemergency brake while you're
trying to go uphill.
And the worst part is mostwomen don't even realize they're
in burnout until their bodygoes.
Nope, we're done here, welcometo 'It Starts at Vagus', where
we take a nervous systemapproach to feeling good again.

(00:20):
I'm Emily and I'm your guide tostress relief, without adding
more to your to-do list, becausewe're and I'm your guide to
stress relief, without addingmore to your to-do list, because
we're doing less but we'redoing it better.
Today we're going to be talkingabout something that's not just
physical or mental.
It's nervous system deep andthat's burnout.
We're going to decode it, makefun of it a little, because

(00:41):
humor is medicine and, mostimportantly, offer you tools
that don't require a three-hourmorning routine
.
First off, the burnout check-in.
Let's start with the signs ofburnout.
You might be in burnout ifyou're exhausted, even after
eight hours of sleep.
The hobbies you used to lovenow feel like chores.
You are just one spilled cup ofcoffee away from losing your

(01:05):
mind, and cynicism is your newlove language For me.
My alarms go off when I feelnumb.
It's when I care less aboutwhat I am doing in my free time.
Free time is pretty rare for me, and when that free time does
show up, I want to enjoy it.
But when I start wanting tofeel numb, to gravitating, to

(01:28):
wanting to feel numb, I knowthat this is a big sign for me
to get rejuvenated, that I needto be doing something that makes
me feel better, especiallysince I don't want to be, which
sounds ridiculous, but sometimeswe're at war with our own self
when this happens, when I'mdoing things that I usually

(01:51):
would like to do, but I justdon't enjoy them anymore.
This is when I know that I needthat vagus nerve exercise reset
and I put that in the linksbelow in the description.
So if you want to find out howto do that step-by-step, you can
go ahead and watch the video.
But that is my go-to becauseonce I reset my nervous system,

(02:15):
I start feeling like myselfagain, I start enjoying the
things that I used to like, andthen I felt numb.
Then I do the vagus nerveexercise and then I start
feeling myself.
I start enjoying those thingsall over and it is wonderful.
It's so night and day and it'sso important to support our

(02:39):
nerve system so that we canenjoy our day-to-day life.
So there are three E's toburnout.
First one is exhaustion, thenescape, then edginess.
Let's break this down.
Exhaustion that is where we arephysically and emotionally
fatigued, where we just don'tfeel like we have it inside us

(03:01):
to keep going, where we have toforce it and we're so tired and
it just takes that mental loadto get anything accomplished.
Then there's escape.
This is withdrawing from thethings that you've once cared
about.
Like I just said, I gravitateto wanting to feel numb.
I don't want to feel the bad, Idon't want to feel the good, I

(03:23):
just want to be that numbfeeling so that I don't have to
feel anything, which is aterrible place to be, because
life is enjoyable and we want todo that.
The third one, which isedginess that's where you're
irritable, frustrated and youmight even have that desire to
hide away from people.

(03:44):
Put yourself in that bathroomand just lock out life.
Those three signs of burnout sayit is time to take care of your
nervous system because it willhelp you physically and
emotionally, which is a win-win.
So what causes burnout?
Burnout isn't just working toohard.
It can be deeper than that.

(04:06):
We have the work-life balance.
If that's all off and you'redoing too much work and not
enough enjoying life.
There's also feeling unseen orunderappreciated.
You could feel like you've gotthat perfectionism in you and
your inner critic is screamingon a microphone and you just

(04:28):
can't settle it down and sayit's okay not to be perfect.
So, in a nutshell, there iskind of like a formula to
figuring out if we have burnout,and that is high responsibility
with low support minus restequals burnout.
So again, it's highresponsibility plus low support,

(04:50):
minus rest equals burnout.
All right, so now that we knowwe have burnout, we realize it,
we realize that we're irritableor wanting to hide or numb like
I do, let's find our healingpath.
Because it's not another job Iswear it is not it is rest and
recovery.
Once you get your nervoussystem settled down or you're

(05:12):
still in the process of beingkind to your nervous system,
that rest and recovery willsupport it even more.
So we're not going to glamorizeproductivity.
We are going to prioritize atleast seven, dare I say even
nine, hours of sleep, because atnight your brain literally

(05:33):
cleans itself.
It needs that time to take outthe trash of the day and
rejuvenate.
It is very important for yourbrain to be able to do that.
You can also schedule thoseguilt-free micro breaks
throughout the day.
They're just little momentswhere you can either laugh or
take a moment of gratitude,those sparkles of joy that can

(05:57):
remind you that today is okay,even if you're having a bad one,
or if you're having a stressfulday.
You can say I'm going to takethis micro moment to breathe for
a little bit.
So do these things that bringyou joy.
It might feel, quote, unquote,useless, not productive.
For example, that would be liketaking time to doodle where

(06:25):
there's really no point asidefrom helping you feel better.
It's not gonna be part of yourto-do list.
It is simply there for you toenjoy.
Rest isn't earned by beingmiserable first.
You don't need to suffer todeserve a nap.
Remember that, because our bodyrelies on rest.

(06:46):
It's how it functions and feelsgood, and you can have
self-compassion overself-criticism for yourself by
practicing some mindfultechniques, or even by
practicing mindful techniques,or even if it's three slow, deep
breaths while hiding in yourbathroom.

(07:07):
Get those micro moments in andyou can replace the thought of I
should be doing more to whatneeds to get done right now and
can it be done at a differenttime, because there are some
things that need to get doneright now and we need to claim
those responsibilities.
But sometimes we put things onourselves that don't and it can

(07:29):
be done at a later time or,better yet, can it be delegated.
We can also talk to yourselflike someone that you love.
Sometimes that self-criticism,it just beats us down, even
though nobody's saying it to usother than ourselves.
But think of yourself as yourcheerleader, not a cranky boss.

(07:49):
You should be supportingyourself, rooting for yourself,
saying yeah, you got this, andtake those moments to say I can
do this and I am.
That's all it is.
You are doing it, but with thesupport of your nervous system
regulation.
So let's rewire your inner voice.

(08:11):
We're going to recognize,interrupt and validate.
So, step one, recognize anegative thought.
Step two, interrupt it withtruth or curiosity, because,
remember, we are curious people.
The world is so glamorous andso deep.

(08:32):
The human body alone amazes meevery single day when I think of
what the human body can do andovercome and create.
It's amazing.
There are endless possibilities.
So if you're a curious person,start getting curious and if
you're a person that needs to begrounded in truth, look for
things that are true, becausewhen we are criticizing ourself,

(08:54):
we tell ourself lies.
Often it's really easy to lieto yourself and that is why we
need to be grounded in truth andthat curiosity to interrupt
those negative thoughts.
Then you validate yourself witha new, supportive reframe.
So you take those truths, youtake that curiosity and you mesh

(09:15):
them up together and say youknow, whenever I do this, I'm
going to think that instead,again, be your cheerleader,
let's reframe your mindset.
Take this one little motto ofdo less, do it better, Because
when we break it down intolittle, tiny steps, we're able
to feel accomplished, we're ableto do it easier, we're able to

(09:39):
feel like we're doing the littlesteps to support our nervous
system, our physical and mentalwellbeing, and get that quick
win.
We're not overdoing it, we'renot adding, we're doing less but
doing it well.
For example, folding laundry.
Now you could leave it tobecome a laundry tree, where

(10:02):
it's big at the base and smalleron top, and you've got this
tree of laundry.
Or you could say I'm going totake two songs that I like, or
even one song that you like.
Fold the laundry while you singtheir song.
That singing will help yourvagus nerve settle down and
you'll be getting a project done, more happy.

(10:24):
Then you can go ahead and giveyourself a high five for getting
the laundry done and not makinga Christmas tree from laundry.
And remember you're not lazy,you're healing.
There's a big difference.
Burnout isn't a sign ofweakness.
It's a sign saying that yournervous system has been running

(10:45):
a marathon with no water breaks.
The world may not slow down,but you can.
You must, for your own sake andfor the version that's waiting
for you on the other side ofrest.
Thank you for spending sometime with me today.
May you find your rest beforeyou're forced to, and I hope

(11:06):
your body feels less burdened,you breathe more open and your
next step is lighter than thelast.
We'll see you next week.
Thanks for listening to.
It Starts at Vegas.
New episodes are released everyTuesday.
If you liked this episode, goahead and give it a subscribe
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(11:26):
on what's coming next.
If you'd like a step-by-stepvideo on how to do a pain-free
and easy vagus nerve exercise,grab my free vagus nerve reset
video in the show notes.
It's what I do when I feel likeI just not like myself.
Until next time, remember,wellness starts at vagus.