August 13, 2025 • 22 mins
A legendary variety show blending witty monologues, comic sketches, and musical interludes, all anchored by the impeccable timing of its beloved host. It’s a masterclass in comedic timing.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:06):
The jobs program sum with Don vests orchestra. The or
opens from the motions.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
And now for that self made man that could have
done a better job at Benny's. Again, it's the.
Speaker 3 (00:27):
Jack Benny, the hotel clerk remembers, And for once you write, Don,
you might be kidding, but I am a self made man.
Nobody help me. You're looking well, say that all of
Rembrandt's paintings weren't good either. Are you a self made man?
Speaker 4 (00:42):
Don?
Speaker 5 (00:43):
No?
Speaker 2 (00:43):
The thought brought me jeans show for myself.
Speaker 3 (00:53):
Let me get a few men to night, Don, just
for a change. Fair, After all, you're the comedian. Well
remember that.
Speaker 2 (00:59):
I'll try. But by the way back, you know, I
tried to get in touch with the where were you well, Don?
Speaker 3 (01:05):
I sort of relaxed the day I went around for
all the new You know, I'm a real movie fan.
Or yes, sir, I can watch the pictures.
Speaker 4 (01:13):
All day, you know.
Speaker 3 (01:14):
About eleven o'clock this morning I went over and saw
College Rhythm with Joe Penner and Lanny Ross.
Speaker 4 (01:20):
They were with.
Speaker 2 (01:21):
Me this morning, No, John, I mean they were in
the picture.
Speaker 4 (01:24):
See see.
Speaker 3 (01:25):
Then I had lunch, and I had lunch, and right
after lunch I went after lunch.
Speaker 4 (01:29):
I went in to see the Gay Divorcee. You mean
Peggy Joyce already?
Speaker 3 (01:37):
But then later on I went over to see what
Kate lewis kidd and don't nask it and don't natki.
It was busy Dean, it was Cagney. Well, Jack, you're
the comedia. Thanks, you'd be surprised. I much better, I
feel already. Well, anyway, it was four o'clock, so I
dropped in on The Merry Widow with Cavaggier. Then I
left Cavaggier and saw A Day with jell O. Yes, John,
it was a double feature right.
Speaker 2 (02:00):
Anyway, it was.
Speaker 3 (02:00):
Time to broadcast, so I came here and like Eddie Candor,
I am ready to.
Speaker 4 (02:05):
Kid million boy? Am I hot tonight?
Speaker 5 (02:13):
Thank you folks?
Speaker 4 (02:14):
What are you thinking for Mary? That applauses for me?
Speaker 3 (02:17):
Oh?
Speaker 5 (02:18):
I thought it was my reception?
Speaker 4 (02:19):
Oh, certainly is.
Speaker 5 (02:21):
A pick of public here today and go on tomorrow?
Speaker 3 (02:24):
Well?
Speaker 4 (02:24):
What are you all day?
Speaker 6 (02:25):
Mary?
Speaker 4 (02:25):
And am I sorry? I asked you?
Speaker 5 (02:27):
I was over on Wimpole Street visiting the Barrett What
the Barrett to wimpolesty?
Speaker 4 (02:34):
You hear me? Oh? How are the Barretts? It's awful?
Speaker 5 (02:38):
Jack, the old man Barrett is getting so mean. All
his daughters had to leave Wimpole Street.
Speaker 4 (02:43):
I see they couldn't bear it. Do you hear me?
Speaker 5 (02:49):
Folks?
Speaker 2 (02:50):
You certainly are the.
Speaker 4 (02:51):
Comedian to night.
Speaker 5 (02:52):
What's funny about that?
Speaker 3 (02:54):
Jack?
Speaker 4 (02:54):
Mary? The Barretts of Wimpole Street they couldn't barratt.
Speaker 6 (02:58):
See I still.
Speaker 2 (03:00):
Don't get it.
Speaker 6 (03:05):
Well, hello, everybody here, I am pit us a fiddle
and look like a saxophone.
Speaker 3 (03:10):
Ah, the other South May comedian has arrived.
Speaker 4 (03:14):
Oh thanks, Jack, Do you already think so?
Speaker 3 (03:16):
Absolutely? Frank, you are, without a doubt a real comedian.
Speaker 4 (03:19):
Of course I can sing in a pinch.
Speaker 3 (03:22):
Yeah, and that pinch is very important. Don't lose it.
You know, there's you, there's I says me. I don't
change the subject. I saw pictures this afternoon too, Marry
you ask him what picture?
Speaker 4 (03:34):
I can what take?
Speaker 5 (03:35):
You was just saying, I saw.
Speaker 3 (03:37):
Imitation of life with Don Betsa.
Speaker 6 (03:42):
Well he's a good imitation. He means I went with
him to see the picture.
Speaker 5 (03:46):
That's right. Go ahead and spoil a joke.
Speaker 6 (03:50):
Well, I'm a comedian too, yees Don. You're also very
funny that I am.
Speaker 2 (03:54):
Of course I can lead an orchestra.
Speaker 3 (03:55):
In the pinch, Get ready down the pinch, will be
here any minute, says you, says I says Who says me?
Speaker 4 (04:04):
Wait a minute, Wait a minute.
Speaker 3 (04:05):
Five minutes of our time going, and we're not getting
any plate, same old arguments every week, You know, fellas,
what this program needs is new talent, people with specialties,
not pinches.
Speaker 4 (04:15):
They married. Call up Jake Gonzel, the agent Jake Ginzel,
who he handles all kinds of radio talent.
Speaker 3 (04:21):
See if you can rush somebody over here living up
this program a little. His number is Lackawanna seven four six.
Speaker 5 (04:28):
Oh, all right, hello, operators, gimme Bryant oh four nine married.
Speaker 4 (04:35):
That's the wrong number.
Speaker 5 (04:36):
What's the difference, As long as the answers all right?
Hello is this Columbus two five nine three? Hello? Is
that you Jake? Say Jake, this is a yellow program.
Speaker 4 (04:51):
Rry tell him the six delicious flavor. Wilson, Keep out
of it.
Speaker 5 (04:53):
Say Jake Jacken. He wants a new talent. Yeah, something
differant novelties to the air.
Speaker 4 (05:01):
Ask him what he's got married?
Speaker 5 (05:02):
What did he got, Jake? He says he's got singers, dancers, musicians, jugglers.
Speaker 4 (05:08):
Tell him to mix them up, Mix them up.
Speaker 5 (05:10):
Jake, and send them right over.
Speaker 3 (05:12):
Goodbye, Thanks Mary. We'll get some real talent up here
without pinches play, Jake.
Speaker 4 (05:18):
I mean, Don.
Speaker 3 (05:37):
Avester and his orchestra stay married. Did any of that
talent get here yet?
Speaker 5 (05:41):
Not yet?
Speaker 3 (05:42):
Yes, say Don, I hear you're doing fine at low State,
having a big week.
Speaker 2 (05:46):
Yes.
Speaker 4 (05:47):
How's everything up in Boston with your show?
Speaker 3 (05:49):
Oh fine, I'm having a lot of fun in Boston,
And besides.
Speaker 4 (05:52):
I'm learning to speak English. What do you mean.
Speaker 3 (05:55):
Well, I was at a party the other night and
told a story about my aunt and somebody direct me.
You see in Boston, Don, it's your aunts, you see
they used a broad a there.
Speaker 6 (06:05):
Well that's the proper English, Jack. Whenever I go to Boston,
I asked for a room.
Speaker 4 (06:09):
And a boss.
Speaker 3 (06:11):
Oh, well you can have your boss. I took a
bath this morning. Look just as good as you.
Speaker 5 (06:14):
Do, you know, Jack, I love the way they talk
in Boston.
Speaker 4 (06:20):
That's right. Mary. You were there too. Did you have
any trouble with the boss and bath?
Speaker 6 (06:25):
No?
Speaker 5 (06:25):
I took a shower and everything was all right.
Speaker 4 (06:28):
Well that was smart, you know.
Speaker 6 (06:30):
I played in Boston a few weeks ago and I can't.
Speaker 4 (06:33):
Had any trouble. You can't.
Speaker 6 (06:36):
No. You see, I just walked into the restaurant ordered
hormonogs and everybody understood me.
Speaker 3 (06:45):
And you know I like their baked bons and cotsha,
don't you.
Speaker 1 (06:50):
I have no complaints to make about Boston. Here there
yellow is jellow, and it tastes twice as good as
ever before.
Speaker 3 (06:57):
Again, we're getting no place. What kind of approbe is
it tonight? There's somebody at the door to you.
Speaker 4 (07:04):
It is Mary, come in? Who is it? Jake sent me? Well,
thanks heaven, I'm glad you got here. Oh what do
you do? Fine? And how do you do? No? No,
I said, what do you do? What's your specialty? Well?
Speaker 3 (07:21):
I tell jokes and juggle. Jokes and juggle. That's the
night combination.
Speaker 4 (07:25):
Have you had an experience on the air, Yeah, I
fell out of a balloon one.
Speaker 3 (07:29):
Well, don't worry. That can't happen here. Well, anyway, let's
hear your joke. That's what we need on this program. See,
that's why I sent for you a real good joke.
Speaker 4 (07:38):
All right. My father's hair only grows on one side
of his head. What side is that? The outside? That's fine,
that's fine. That's very good.
Speaker 2 (07:47):
We can use you on one side of this program.
Speaker 4 (07:49):
What side is that the outside?
Speaker 2 (07:56):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (07:57):
That come out of my own head. You must have
used it, fine comb. What else can you do? I
sing too? You see? Have you got a good boy?
They tell me I'm a second Frank Parker.
Speaker 2 (08:08):
Oh you're a.
Speaker 5 (08:08):
Second Frank Parker jackaving trouble with the first one, and I.
Speaker 4 (08:15):
Modified, well, I'll look do anything. Well, you didn't get
it over with. Yeah, I'm in a hurry too.
Speaker 2 (08:22):
I want what are you in such a hurry for?
Speaker 4 (08:24):
I drive a truck on a pinch?
Speaker 2 (08:26):
Oh you too?
Speaker 4 (08:27):
Eh, a go ahead, get started? What do you want
to do first?
Speaker 2 (08:30):
First, I'll juggle. I'll juggle five.
Speaker 4 (08:32):
Places one time. Wait a minute, What good is juggling
on the radio? How can they see you? Or you
tell jokes?
Speaker 3 (08:38):
Nobody can see you, I know, but listen, I mean,
how can they appreciate your juggling?
Speaker 4 (08:42):
Juggling? Nobody will believe you. I'll take your nose.
Speaker 2 (08:45):
I'm doing it.
Speaker 4 (08:45):
Oh well that squares things.
Speaker 3 (08:47):
Yeah, go ahead, juggle your five plates.
Speaker 4 (08:50):
By the way, what's your name?
Speaker 6 (08:52):
W C.
Speaker 2 (08:53):
Jones?
Speaker 4 (08:53):
What's the WC stand for field? Oh? W C Fields
I get it or get started.
Speaker 2 (08:59):
You wanted a little news with this, yeah, don give
him a little.
Speaker 3 (09:02):
Juggle music, my com don, I said, juggle music, not
jungle music.
Speaker 4 (09:12):
Oh pardon a very ladies and gentlemen.
Speaker 2 (09:20):
Five places, and very very good too.
Speaker 4 (09:23):
First juggler.
Speaker 2 (09:26):
He is now juggling fourth plates.
Speaker 4 (09:29):
I mean three plates. Well even three plates isn't bad?
Speaker 3 (09:36):
Ah, how marvelously he handles one plate.
Speaker 2 (09:39):
That's for just a minute.
Speaker 3 (09:41):
Boy, give me that plate, will you here? I'll stick
out your head.
Speaker 2 (09:46):
He is now juggling no plate.
Speaker 4 (09:50):
Carry him, My boy says, there's no plates like home.
Speaker 2 (09:57):
House with you talent track.
Speaker 4 (09:58):
Don't worry.
Speaker 2 (09:59):
You didn't start so good either.
Speaker 4 (10:01):
And now folks come in, Who are you?
Speaker 5 (10:07):
Jay sent me? I can imitate a dog.
Speaker 3 (10:10):
And then a pinch.
Speaker 5 (10:11):
I can do a rooster.
Speaker 4 (10:14):
Mary clam that door, will.
Speaker 3 (10:18):
And our ladies and gentlemen, Frank Parker number one, we'll
sing one night of love?
Speaker 4 (10:22):
Is that right, Parker? Yes?
Speaker 3 (10:23):
But I can sing blame it on my youth in
a pinch?
Speaker 4 (10:26):
All right, all right, sing Mary Mary? What are you
laughing at? I don't know. I'm tired. I was swelling night,
(10:46):
Frank swell.
Speaker 3 (10:47):
I was Frank Parker singing, blame it on my youth
and all my anxious public. We are continuing our series
of breath stopping, tear jerking, hair raising dramas, and for
the first time on any air, we are forresenting that
thrilling play of the Mexican.
Speaker 4 (11:02):
Border, the rows of Rio Grande Street.
Speaker 3 (11:06):
This play at a longer run than the twenties cent
pair of ladies sacking. It ran three js and Trenton,
and then the cast ran from there to Philadelphia, and
unlike Abe Cyrish Rose, they are still running. This play
will go on immediately after the next number. Parker, you
get some caxus plants and some big sombreros. Mary, you
(11:26):
go out and get ten cents worth of Mexican dialects.
Speaker 5 (11:29):
Where can I get that yet?
Speaker 4 (11:30):
Any chili parler? Mary?
Speaker 3 (11:32):
Play don and give us a chance to get to Mexico.
That was Don Vesser and his pop Somali playing La
cocarroacha or cucaracket. And now for our play of the
(11:52):
Mexican Border, the rows of the Rio Grande atmosphere. Dono
(12:23):
ah rosa the Rio. You are to be my only daughters,
and I am to you your father y si, Senor
that see, Senor, you must never to leave this rancho,
and if somebody tacks you away, I kill him. A
rambo Caraco, Ricardo Cortez, Wombo, A little love over majo.
Speaker 5 (12:52):
Ah, it is my sweetheart outside my window.
Speaker 4 (12:57):
A gringo. Hey, Hey, what you do on there?
Speaker 3 (13:06):
Hey?
Speaker 4 (13:06):
K I tick him?
Speaker 3 (13:09):
Ntella Fronto Toronto, Montreal.
Speaker 5 (13:13):
No, Papa, it is Senior Franco, pa Carol, hez my loafer.
Speaker 4 (13:18):
What do you mean loafer?
Speaker 5 (13:20):
I love him and he loves.
Speaker 3 (13:22):
Me, Taquita, you shall never marry gringo. So long as
I leave.
Speaker 5 (13:27):
The tweet air, you leave the best hair.
Speaker 4 (13:32):
M.
Speaker 3 (13:32):
Three o'clock Mexican standard time, Tequita, I am very tired.
I will go to my room and take one big.
Speaker 5 (13:42):
Nap Okay Senor trut oh karaota karaota art coming, Senior Reacher,
I have terrible headaches. Bring me to cast nets. I
feel like dancing the fantango.
Speaker 4 (13:58):
Oh, friends, I'm fran that's esu, Senor Papa doing that? No, no,
re I what friends? Fan?
Speaker 5 (14:13):
He makes me seat, he always talking, he sleeps ah,
did you see him again?
Speaker 3 (14:22):
Mine?
Speaker 5 (14:23):
Honies karaoka queen see thank Gilados for two see see Arisa,
I shall hear you and tell my gay Cabelaro to
come up downstairs, DC, Senor Lisa, come in.
Speaker 2 (14:37):
White bred, quiet my loaf.
Speaker 5 (14:44):
You will wake up to see your papa.
Speaker 4 (14:46):
Oh Rose of the Buick Rio.
Speaker 3 (14:49):
I love you.
Speaker 2 (14:52):
Ever since I have come to Mexico.
Speaker 4 (14:53):
I can't eat, I can't sleep. Ah. He can't even
get a job.
Speaker 1 (15:00):
Who was that, Rose?
Speaker 4 (15:01):
Papa?
Speaker 5 (15:01):
You're always talking? He sleep?
Speaker 6 (15:03):
Ah, Senior, little Rose, for the last time, will.
Speaker 4 (15:06):
You marry me?
Speaker 5 (15:07):
I would like him, yes, but are you read?
Speaker 4 (15:09):
You mean rich?
Speaker 5 (15:11):
Reads rich? As long as you're wealthy?
Speaker 2 (15:15):
Well, I own plenty of oil. Yes, it's in his hair,
Papa sleep. I don't care if you're sleeping.
Speaker 4 (15:25):
Where did he say? My all was in your hair?
Your hair? What was that.
Speaker 6 (15:31):
Hair?
Speaker 2 (15:31):
What's on a monkey's face? Look in the mirror and
find out.
Speaker 4 (15:38):
I wish I could dream of an answer.
Speaker 3 (15:49):
Don't wake up, papa, Ah, Rose, for the last time,
will you marry me?
Speaker 2 (15:53):
No?
Speaker 5 (15:53):
No, Papa hates springles.
Speaker 4 (15:55):
He will tell you he will. Eh.
Speaker 2 (15:57):
Well, there's nothing that for me to do then, but
steal you and take you across the rio.
Speaker 5 (16:00):
Grand So I am so afraid afraid of what afraid
that you will change your mind?
Speaker 3 (16:06):
Ah, Rose, my beautiful black eyes too them.
Speaker 5 (16:09):
Ah, Frank, my Mexican hair is pop.
Speaker 3 (16:15):
Come Rose, let us away where he's your horse outside?
Speaker 7 (16:18):
Come along, Rose, he's seven o'clock. Jaquita, jaquita Rose.
Speaker 4 (16:30):
What are you? Oh?
Speaker 6 (16:31):
You know you?
Speaker 2 (16:31):
Jonna has just a lode with Francos.
Speaker 6 (16:33):
They re gwind across the Rio.
Speaker 4 (16:35):
Grand. Oh, you're not talking when I find them.
Speaker 3 (16:38):
Nobody can say this to me, the great Rudy Villa.
Come on, you, pion, follow me. We are heading for
the Rio Grand gear up. No, no, not that way, man,
that is the hot sun river.
Speaker 4 (16:57):
This way. Look, bros, we're being follows. Get sleep, horses.
Speaker 3 (17:12):
Flag.
Speaker 5 (17:13):
We should got break on the topic.
Speaker 2 (17:14):
Get the acts that for cause we must.
Speaker 4 (17:16):
Hurry our cabin letters. We must cross the rio. Gain.
Come on, stay under me, horse, I can't swim. Ah
here we are we making it all right? They will
not get away from us here.
Speaker 3 (17:41):
Oh, I think they stopping these cabines. We shall see
what we shall see. Carlos, you go back up the cabin.
See senor either all.
Speaker 4 (17:51):
You watch it roll. Tanchez you come with me, and
Lopez you play the piano.
Speaker 5 (17:57):
This is.
Speaker 2 (18:01):
Right, Thank you, Jess.
Speaker 5 (18:04):
It's your papa and he have some topa break with
you my friends.
Speaker 4 (18:10):
Don't worry, Rose, I have a pretty tough gang myself.
Come on, man, it looks like a fight to the finish.
I'm out of that, Cabby, don't you read Sanko? Stand
by man, Don't worry. We will have faith in us.
I was better. I'm all out, all right with a shoe,
(18:31):
little man.
Speaker 5 (18:32):
What now?
Speaker 4 (18:34):
Well, I guess we better go out. We just moved
in here and I don't want to cause any trouble.
Speaker 2 (18:40):
Aha.
Speaker 4 (18:40):
Another victory for me.
Speaker 2 (18:42):
A people pop Las Vegas sign by the Mexican we
got here? Hey, you seal my daughter?
Speaker 4 (18:50):
What is your name? Don Fresco Parker? And you got
who are you? Don? Jose Pets? Jose Pets?
Speaker 2 (18:57):
What's the whole day for in a pin?
Speaker 4 (19:00):
Hey? A tough guy over there? And what they call you?
Speaker 2 (19:03):
Don Jello Wilson that's street donand once ago right see
you when you York?
Speaker 6 (19:07):
Hey?
Speaker 2 (19:08):
What you doing here?
Speaker 1 (19:09):
I'm telling Jello Jello is just as good to pop
off a Mexican mealers or any other kind of a meeting.
Speaker 4 (19:14):
You said him? Be boy, Hey, just one a meeting.
Who is that Andre hiding behind you?
Speaker 1 (19:25):
Hey?
Speaker 4 (19:25):
Tell me who are you?
Speaker 2 (19:27):
Jay sent?
Speaker 4 (19:30):
For Heaven's sake, what are you doing in Mexico?
Speaker 2 (19:32):
Are you a mech sure mex fletterman? Oh you're a
Mexican A nobody else?
Speaker 4 (19:41):
What you do down here?
Speaker 3 (19:42):
I just came downside Browning silly, say, Thomas Sensor. Are
you from Mexico?
Speaker 2 (19:49):
What are you from Mexico?
Speaker 4 (19:51):
African?
Speaker 2 (19:52):
I'm from Brooklyn.
Speaker 7 (19:55):
I know that that's must tense.
Speaker 4 (19:57):
Didn't fool me?
Speaker 6 (19:58):
Hey?
Speaker 4 (19:58):
Who are these three fellows with your humbries and my brothers?
Speaker 2 (20:01):
And we're all Mexicans?
Speaker 4 (20:02):
Are the four mex brothers? Hey?
Speaker 3 (20:04):
Yeah, yes, Peter Pencer twice as Richel and Jello?
Speaker 4 (20:09):
Oh you gotta brow there, Yellow, Hey.
Speaker 7 (20:11):
I Senor stap a clowning.
Speaker 2 (20:13):
I would like to marry your daughter Rose.
Speaker 4 (20:15):
I love her too much like anything.
Speaker 3 (20:17):
Oh you go on Mexican too Well, you will have
to ask for yourself because she will have to leave
with you, not me and the rest of the pinch.
Speaker 6 (20:25):
Rose of Grand Street, for the last time, will you
marry me?
Speaker 2 (20:29):
I am healthy, young and rich.
Speaker 5 (20:31):
No, never, I will marry Jello Jello? Why because Yellowy
twice as rich.
Speaker 3 (20:37):
Oh that's all I want to know, play Dona Manuel
Umberto Betro.
Speaker 2 (21:42):
That was the last number of the Youth program in
the New Jello series.
Speaker 3 (21:46):
Well, folks, I hope you all enjoyed our little Mexican
play and we'll be with you again next Sunday.
Speaker 4 (21:51):
Night, Marry, Where are you going now?
Speaker 5 (21:52):
I'm going to stay home.
Speaker 4 (21:53):
Jack, Come on man, I'll take you home.
Speaker 5 (21:55):
All right, Jack, We're not on horsback. I can still
see like right across the rio.
Speaker 4 (21:59):
Grand night, folks. Oh the selection love to jump around
the corners from the motion picture Have a Heart.
Speaker 2 (22:18):
This is a National Broadcasting Company
Speaker 6 (22:23):
H
The jobs program sum with Don vests orchestra. The or
opens from the motions.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
And now for that self made man that could have
done a better job at Benny's. Again, it's the.
Speaker 3 (00:27):
Jack Benny, the hotel clerk remembers, And for once you write, Don,
you might be kidding, but I am a self made man.
Nobody help me. You're looking well, say that all of
Rembrandt's paintings weren't good either. Are you a self made man?
Speaker 4 (00:42):
Don?
Speaker 5 (00:43):
No?
Speaker 2 (00:43):
The thought brought me jeans show for myself.
Speaker 3 (00:53):
Let me get a few men to night, Don, just
for a change. Fair, After all, you're the comedian. Well
remember that.
Speaker 2 (00:59):
I'll try. But by the way back, you know, I
tried to get in touch with the where were you well, Don?
Speaker 3 (01:05):
I sort of relaxed the day I went around for
all the new You know, I'm a real movie fan.
Or yes, sir, I can watch the pictures.
Speaker 4 (01:13):
All day, you know.
Speaker 3 (01:14):
About eleven o'clock this morning I went over and saw
College Rhythm with Joe Penner and Lanny Ross.
Speaker 4 (01:20):
They were with.
Speaker 2 (01:21):
Me this morning, No, John, I mean they were in
the picture.
Speaker 4 (01:24):
See see.
Speaker 3 (01:25):
Then I had lunch, and I had lunch, and right
after lunch I went after lunch.
Speaker 4 (01:29):
I went in to see the Gay Divorcee. You mean
Peggy Joyce already?
Speaker 3 (01:37):
But then later on I went over to see what
Kate lewis kidd and don't nask it and don't natki.
It was busy Dean, it was Cagney. Well, Jack, you're
the comedia. Thanks, you'd be surprised. I much better, I
feel already. Well, anyway, it was four o'clock, so I
dropped in on The Merry Widow with Cavaggier. Then I
left Cavaggier and saw A Day with jell O. Yes, John,
it was a double feature right.
Speaker 2 (02:00):
Anyway, it was.
Speaker 3 (02:00):
Time to broadcast, so I came here and like Eddie Candor,
I am ready to.
Speaker 4 (02:05):
Kid million boy? Am I hot tonight?
Speaker 5 (02:13):
Thank you folks?
Speaker 4 (02:14):
What are you thinking for Mary? That applauses for me?
Speaker 3 (02:17):
Oh?
Speaker 5 (02:18):
I thought it was my reception?
Speaker 4 (02:19):
Oh, certainly is.
Speaker 5 (02:21):
A pick of public here today and go on tomorrow?
Speaker 3 (02:24):
Well?
Speaker 4 (02:24):
What are you all day?
Speaker 6 (02:25):
Mary?
Speaker 4 (02:25):
And am I sorry? I asked you?
Speaker 5 (02:27):
I was over on Wimpole Street visiting the Barrett What
the Barrett to wimpolesty?
Speaker 4 (02:34):
You hear me? Oh? How are the Barretts? It's awful?
Speaker 5 (02:38):
Jack, the old man Barrett is getting so mean. All
his daughters had to leave Wimpole Street.
Speaker 4 (02:43):
I see they couldn't bear it. Do you hear me?
Speaker 5 (02:49):
Folks?
Speaker 2 (02:50):
You certainly are the.
Speaker 4 (02:51):
Comedian to night.
Speaker 5 (02:52):
What's funny about that?
Speaker 3 (02:54):
Jack?
Speaker 4 (02:54):
Mary? The Barretts of Wimpole Street they couldn't barratt.
Speaker 6 (02:58):
See I still.
Speaker 2 (03:00):
Don't get it.
Speaker 6 (03:05):
Well, hello, everybody here, I am pit us a fiddle
and look like a saxophone.
Speaker 3 (03:10):
Ah, the other South May comedian has arrived.
Speaker 4 (03:14):
Oh thanks, Jack, Do you already think so?
Speaker 3 (03:16):
Absolutely? Frank, you are, without a doubt a real comedian.
Speaker 4 (03:19):
Of course I can sing in a pinch.
Speaker 3 (03:22):
Yeah, and that pinch is very important. Don't lose it.
You know, there's you, there's I says me. I don't
change the subject. I saw pictures this afternoon too, Marry
you ask him what picture?
Speaker 4 (03:34):
I can what take?
Speaker 5 (03:35):
You was just saying, I saw.
Speaker 3 (03:37):
Imitation of life with Don Betsa.
Speaker 6 (03:42):
Well he's a good imitation. He means I went with
him to see the picture.
Speaker 5 (03:46):
That's right. Go ahead and spoil a joke.
Speaker 6 (03:50):
Well, I'm a comedian too, yees Don. You're also very
funny that I am.
Speaker 2 (03:54):
Of course I can lead an orchestra.
Speaker 3 (03:55):
In the pinch, Get ready down the pinch, will be
here any minute, says you, says I says Who says me?
Speaker 4 (04:04):
Wait a minute, Wait a minute.
Speaker 3 (04:05):
Five minutes of our time going, and we're not getting
any plate, same old arguments every week, You know, fellas,
what this program needs is new talent, people with specialties,
not pinches.
Speaker 4 (04:15):
They married. Call up Jake Gonzel, the agent Jake Ginzel,
who he handles all kinds of radio talent.
Speaker 3 (04:21):
See if you can rush somebody over here living up
this program a little. His number is Lackawanna seven four six.
Speaker 5 (04:28):
Oh, all right, hello, operators, gimme Bryant oh four nine married.
Speaker 4 (04:35):
That's the wrong number.
Speaker 5 (04:36):
What's the difference, As long as the answers all right?
Hello is this Columbus two five nine three? Hello? Is
that you Jake? Say Jake, this is a yellow program.
Speaker 4 (04:51):
Rry tell him the six delicious flavor. Wilson, Keep out
of it.
Speaker 5 (04:53):
Say Jake Jacken. He wants a new talent. Yeah, something
differant novelties to the air.
Speaker 4 (05:01):
Ask him what he's got married?
Speaker 5 (05:02):
What did he got, Jake? He says he's got singers, dancers, musicians, jugglers.
Speaker 4 (05:08):
Tell him to mix them up, Mix them up.
Speaker 5 (05:10):
Jake, and send them right over.
Speaker 3 (05:12):
Goodbye, Thanks Mary. We'll get some real talent up here
without pinches play, Jake.
Speaker 4 (05:18):
I mean, Don.
Speaker 3 (05:37):
Avester and his orchestra stay married. Did any of that
talent get here yet?
Speaker 5 (05:41):
Not yet?
Speaker 3 (05:42):
Yes, say Don, I hear you're doing fine at low State,
having a big week.
Speaker 2 (05:46):
Yes.
Speaker 4 (05:47):
How's everything up in Boston with your show?
Speaker 3 (05:49):
Oh fine, I'm having a lot of fun in Boston,
And besides.
Speaker 4 (05:52):
I'm learning to speak English. What do you mean.
Speaker 3 (05:55):
Well, I was at a party the other night and
told a story about my aunt and somebody direct me.
You see in Boston, Don, it's your aunts, you see
they used a broad a there.
Speaker 6 (06:05):
Well that's the proper English, Jack. Whenever I go to Boston,
I asked for a room.
Speaker 4 (06:09):
And a boss.
Speaker 3 (06:11):
Oh, well you can have your boss. I took a
bath this morning. Look just as good as you.
Speaker 5 (06:14):
Do, you know, Jack, I love the way they talk
in Boston.
Speaker 4 (06:20):
That's right. Mary. You were there too. Did you have
any trouble with the boss and bath?
Speaker 6 (06:25):
No?
Speaker 5 (06:25):
I took a shower and everything was all right.
Speaker 4 (06:28):
Well that was smart, you know.
Speaker 6 (06:30):
I played in Boston a few weeks ago and I can't.
Speaker 4 (06:33):
Had any trouble. You can't.
Speaker 6 (06:36):
No. You see, I just walked into the restaurant ordered
hormonogs and everybody understood me.
Speaker 3 (06:45):
And you know I like their baked bons and cotsha,
don't you.
Speaker 1 (06:50):
I have no complaints to make about Boston. Here there
yellow is jellow, and it tastes twice as good as
ever before.
Speaker 3 (06:57):
Again, we're getting no place. What kind of approbe is
it tonight? There's somebody at the door to you.
Speaker 4 (07:04):
It is Mary, come in? Who is it? Jake sent me? Well,
thanks heaven, I'm glad you got here. Oh what do
you do? Fine? And how do you do? No? No,
I said, what do you do? What's your specialty? Well?
Speaker 3 (07:21):
I tell jokes and juggle. Jokes and juggle. That's the
night combination.
Speaker 4 (07:25):
Have you had an experience on the air, Yeah, I
fell out of a balloon one.
Speaker 3 (07:29):
Well, don't worry. That can't happen here. Well, anyway, let's
hear your joke. That's what we need on this program. See,
that's why I sent for you a real good joke.
Speaker 4 (07:38):
All right. My father's hair only grows on one side
of his head. What side is that? The outside? That's fine,
that's fine. That's very good.
Speaker 2 (07:47):
We can use you on one side of this program.
Speaker 4 (07:49):
What side is that the outside?
Speaker 2 (07:56):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (07:57):
That come out of my own head. You must have
used it, fine comb. What else can you do? I
sing too? You see? Have you got a good boy?
They tell me I'm a second Frank Parker.
Speaker 2 (08:08):
Oh you're a.
Speaker 5 (08:08):
Second Frank Parker jackaving trouble with the first one, and I.
Speaker 4 (08:15):
Modified, well, I'll look do anything. Well, you didn't get
it over with. Yeah, I'm in a hurry too.
Speaker 2 (08:22):
I want what are you in such a hurry for?
Speaker 4 (08:24):
I drive a truck on a pinch?
Speaker 2 (08:26):
Oh you too?
Speaker 4 (08:27):
Eh, a go ahead, get started? What do you want
to do first?
Speaker 2 (08:30):
First, I'll juggle. I'll juggle five.
Speaker 4 (08:32):
Places one time. Wait a minute, What good is juggling
on the radio? How can they see you? Or you
tell jokes?
Speaker 3 (08:38):
Nobody can see you, I know, but listen, I mean,
how can they appreciate your juggling?
Speaker 4 (08:42):
Juggling? Nobody will believe you. I'll take your nose.
Speaker 2 (08:45):
I'm doing it.
Speaker 4 (08:45):
Oh well that squares things.
Speaker 3 (08:47):
Yeah, go ahead, juggle your five plates.
Speaker 4 (08:50):
By the way, what's your name?
Speaker 6 (08:52):
W C.
Speaker 2 (08:53):
Jones?
Speaker 4 (08:53):
What's the WC stand for field? Oh? W C Fields
I get it or get started.
Speaker 2 (08:59):
You wanted a little news with this, yeah, don give
him a little.
Speaker 3 (09:02):
Juggle music, my com don, I said, juggle music, not
jungle music.
Speaker 4 (09:12):
Oh pardon a very ladies and gentlemen.
Speaker 2 (09:20):
Five places, and very very good too.
Speaker 4 (09:23):
First juggler.
Speaker 2 (09:26):
He is now juggling fourth plates.
Speaker 4 (09:29):
I mean three plates. Well even three plates isn't bad?
Speaker 3 (09:36):
Ah, how marvelously he handles one plate.
Speaker 2 (09:39):
That's for just a minute.
Speaker 3 (09:41):
Boy, give me that plate, will you here? I'll stick
out your head.
Speaker 2 (09:46):
He is now juggling no plate.
Speaker 4 (09:50):
Carry him, My boy says, there's no plates like home.
Speaker 2 (09:57):
House with you talent track.
Speaker 4 (09:58):
Don't worry.
Speaker 2 (09:59):
You didn't start so good either.
Speaker 4 (10:01):
And now folks come in, Who are you?
Speaker 5 (10:07):
Jay sent me? I can imitate a dog.
Speaker 3 (10:10):
And then a pinch.
Speaker 5 (10:11):
I can do a rooster.
Speaker 4 (10:14):
Mary clam that door, will.
Speaker 3 (10:18):
And our ladies and gentlemen, Frank Parker number one, we'll
sing one night of love?
Speaker 4 (10:22):
Is that right, Parker? Yes?
Speaker 3 (10:23):
But I can sing blame it on my youth in
a pinch?
Speaker 4 (10:26):
All right, all right, sing Mary Mary? What are you
laughing at? I don't know. I'm tired. I was swelling night,
(10:46):
Frank swell.
Speaker 3 (10:47):
I was Frank Parker singing, blame it on my youth
and all my anxious public. We are continuing our series
of breath stopping, tear jerking, hair raising dramas, and for
the first time on any air, we are forresenting that
thrilling play of the Mexican.
Speaker 4 (11:02):
Border, the rows of Rio Grande Street.
Speaker 3 (11:06):
This play at a longer run than the twenties cent
pair of ladies sacking. It ran three js and Trenton,
and then the cast ran from there to Philadelphia, and
unlike Abe Cyrish Rose, they are still running. This play
will go on immediately after the next number. Parker, you
get some caxus plants and some big sombreros. Mary, you
(11:26):
go out and get ten cents worth of Mexican dialects.
Speaker 5 (11:29):
Where can I get that yet?
Speaker 4 (11:30):
Any chili parler? Mary?
Speaker 3 (11:32):
Play don and give us a chance to get to Mexico.
That was Don Vesser and his pop Somali playing La
cocarroacha or cucaracket. And now for our play of the
(11:52):
Mexican Border, the rows of the Rio Grande atmosphere. Dono
(12:23):
ah rosa the Rio. You are to be my only daughters,
and I am to you your father y si, Senor
that see, Senor, you must never to leave this rancho,
and if somebody tacks you away, I kill him. A
rambo Caraco, Ricardo Cortez, Wombo, A little love over majo.
Speaker 5 (12:52):
Ah, it is my sweetheart outside my window.
Speaker 4 (12:57):
A gringo. Hey, Hey, what you do on there?
Speaker 3 (13:06):
Hey?
Speaker 4 (13:06):
K I tick him?
Speaker 3 (13:09):
Ntella Fronto Toronto, Montreal.
Speaker 5 (13:13):
No, Papa, it is Senior Franco, pa Carol, hez my loafer.
Speaker 4 (13:18):
What do you mean loafer?
Speaker 5 (13:20):
I love him and he loves.
Speaker 3 (13:22):
Me, Taquita, you shall never marry gringo. So long as
I leave.
Speaker 5 (13:27):
The tweet air, you leave the best hair.
Speaker 4 (13:32):
M.
Speaker 3 (13:32):
Three o'clock Mexican standard time, Tequita, I am very tired.
I will go to my room and take one big.
Speaker 5 (13:42):
Nap Okay Senor trut oh karaota karaota art coming, Senior Reacher,
I have terrible headaches. Bring me to cast nets. I
feel like dancing the fantango.
Speaker 4 (13:58):
Oh, friends, I'm fran that's esu, Senor Papa doing that? No, no,
re I what friends? Fan?
Speaker 5 (14:13):
He makes me seat, he always talking, he sleeps ah,
did you see him again?
Speaker 3 (14:22):
Mine?
Speaker 5 (14:23):
Honies karaoka queen see thank Gilados for two see see Arisa,
I shall hear you and tell my gay Cabelaro to
come up downstairs, DC, Senor Lisa, come in.
Speaker 2 (14:37):
White bred, quiet my loaf.
Speaker 5 (14:44):
You will wake up to see your papa.
Speaker 4 (14:46):
Oh Rose of the Buick Rio.
Speaker 3 (14:49):
I love you.
Speaker 2 (14:52):
Ever since I have come to Mexico.
Speaker 4 (14:53):
I can't eat, I can't sleep. Ah. He can't even
get a job.
Speaker 1 (15:00):
Who was that, Rose?
Speaker 4 (15:01):
Papa?
Speaker 5 (15:01):
You're always talking? He sleep?
Speaker 6 (15:03):
Ah, Senior, little Rose, for the last time, will.
Speaker 4 (15:06):
You marry me?
Speaker 5 (15:07):
I would like him, yes, but are you read?
Speaker 4 (15:09):
You mean rich?
Speaker 5 (15:11):
Reads rich? As long as you're wealthy?
Speaker 2 (15:15):
Well, I own plenty of oil. Yes, it's in his hair,
Papa sleep. I don't care if you're sleeping.
Speaker 4 (15:25):
Where did he say? My all was in your hair?
Your hair? What was that.
Speaker 6 (15:31):
Hair?
Speaker 2 (15:31):
What's on a monkey's face? Look in the mirror and
find out.
Speaker 4 (15:38):
I wish I could dream of an answer.
Speaker 3 (15:49):
Don't wake up, papa, Ah, Rose, for the last time,
will you marry me?
Speaker 2 (15:53):
No?
Speaker 5 (15:53):
No, Papa hates springles.
Speaker 4 (15:55):
He will tell you he will. Eh.
Speaker 2 (15:57):
Well, there's nothing that for me to do then, but
steal you and take you across the rio.
Speaker 5 (16:00):
Grand So I am so afraid afraid of what afraid
that you will change your mind?
Speaker 3 (16:06):
Ah, Rose, my beautiful black eyes too them.
Speaker 5 (16:09):
Ah, Frank, my Mexican hair is pop.
Speaker 3 (16:15):
Come Rose, let us away where he's your horse outside?
Speaker 7 (16:18):
Come along, Rose, he's seven o'clock. Jaquita, jaquita Rose.
Speaker 4 (16:30):
What are you? Oh?
Speaker 6 (16:31):
You know you?
Speaker 2 (16:31):
Jonna has just a lode with Francos.
Speaker 6 (16:33):
They re gwind across the Rio.
Speaker 4 (16:35):
Grand. Oh, you're not talking when I find them.
Speaker 3 (16:38):
Nobody can say this to me, the great Rudy Villa.
Come on, you, pion, follow me. We are heading for
the Rio Grand gear up. No, no, not that way, man,
that is the hot sun river.
Speaker 4 (16:57):
This way. Look, bros, we're being follows. Get sleep, horses.
Speaker 3 (17:12):
Flag.
Speaker 5 (17:13):
We should got break on the topic.
Speaker 2 (17:14):
Get the acts that for cause we must.
Speaker 4 (17:16):
Hurry our cabin letters. We must cross the rio. Gain.
Come on, stay under me, horse, I can't swim. Ah
here we are we making it all right? They will
not get away from us here.
Speaker 3 (17:41):
Oh, I think they stopping these cabines. We shall see
what we shall see. Carlos, you go back up the cabin.
See senor either all.
Speaker 4 (17:51):
You watch it roll. Tanchez you come with me, and
Lopez you play the piano.
Speaker 5 (17:57):
This is.
Speaker 2 (18:01):
Right, Thank you, Jess.
Speaker 5 (18:04):
It's your papa and he have some topa break with
you my friends.
Speaker 4 (18:10):
Don't worry, Rose, I have a pretty tough gang myself.
Come on, man, it looks like a fight to the finish.
I'm out of that, Cabby, don't you read Sanko? Stand
by man, Don't worry. We will have faith in us.
I was better. I'm all out, all right with a shoe,
(18:31):
little man.
Speaker 5 (18:32):
What now?
Speaker 4 (18:34):
Well, I guess we better go out. We just moved
in here and I don't want to cause any trouble.
Speaker 2 (18:40):
Aha.
Speaker 4 (18:40):
Another victory for me.
Speaker 2 (18:42):
A people pop Las Vegas sign by the Mexican we
got here? Hey, you seal my daughter?
Speaker 4 (18:50):
What is your name? Don Fresco Parker? And you got
who are you? Don? Jose Pets? Jose Pets?
Speaker 2 (18:57):
What's the whole day for in a pin?
Speaker 4 (19:00):
Hey? A tough guy over there? And what they call you?
Speaker 2 (19:03):
Don Jello Wilson that's street donand once ago right see
you when you York?
Speaker 6 (19:07):
Hey?
Speaker 2 (19:08):
What you doing here?
Speaker 1 (19:09):
I'm telling Jello Jello is just as good to pop
off a Mexican mealers or any other kind of a meeting.
Speaker 4 (19:14):
You said him? Be boy, Hey, just one a meeting.
Who is that Andre hiding behind you?
Speaker 1 (19:25):
Hey?
Speaker 4 (19:25):
Tell me who are you?
Speaker 2 (19:27):
Jay sent?
Speaker 4 (19:30):
For Heaven's sake, what are you doing in Mexico?
Speaker 2 (19:32):
Are you a mech sure mex fletterman? Oh you're a
Mexican A nobody else?
Speaker 4 (19:41):
What you do down here?
Speaker 3 (19:42):
I just came downside Browning silly, say, Thomas Sensor. Are
you from Mexico?
Speaker 2 (19:49):
What are you from Mexico?
Speaker 4 (19:51):
African?
Speaker 2 (19:52):
I'm from Brooklyn.
Speaker 7 (19:55):
I know that that's must tense.
Speaker 4 (19:57):
Didn't fool me?
Speaker 6 (19:58):
Hey?
Speaker 4 (19:58):
Who are these three fellows with your humbries and my brothers?
Speaker 2 (20:01):
And we're all Mexicans?
Speaker 4 (20:02):
Are the four mex brothers? Hey?
Speaker 3 (20:04):
Yeah, yes, Peter Pencer twice as Richel and Jello?
Speaker 4 (20:09):
Oh you gotta brow there, Yellow, Hey.
Speaker 7 (20:11):
I Senor stap a clowning.
Speaker 2 (20:13):
I would like to marry your daughter Rose.
Speaker 4 (20:15):
I love her too much like anything.
Speaker 3 (20:17):
Oh you go on Mexican too Well, you will have
to ask for yourself because she will have to leave
with you, not me and the rest of the pinch.
Speaker 6 (20:25):
Rose of Grand Street, for the last time, will you
marry me?
Speaker 2 (20:29):
I am healthy, young and rich.
Speaker 5 (20:31):
No, never, I will marry Jello Jello? Why because Yellowy
twice as rich.
Speaker 3 (20:37):
Oh that's all I want to know, play Dona Manuel
Umberto Betro.
Speaker 2 (21:42):
That was the last number of the Youth program in
the New Jello series.
Speaker 3 (21:46):
Well, folks, I hope you all enjoyed our little Mexican
play and we'll be with you again next Sunday.
Speaker 4 (21:51):
Night, Marry, Where are you going now?
Speaker 5 (21:52):
I'm going to stay home.
Speaker 4 (21:53):
Jack, Come on man, I'll take you home.
Speaker 5 (21:55):
All right, Jack, We're not on horsback. I can still
see like right across the rio.
Speaker 4 (21:59):
Grand night, folks. Oh the selection love to jump around
the corners from the motion picture Have a Heart.
Speaker 2 (22:18):
This is a National Broadcasting Company
Speaker 6 (22:23):
H
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