After navigating the highs and lows of early motherhood alone, Kelley Weinzetl found herself reinventing her life in unexpected ways. She joins us to share her incredible journey from being a young single mom to becoming a life coach dedicated to empowering women, including creating an ebook about transforming your life titled The Power of 3. Kelley offers a fascinating perspective on balancing ambition and family life, having given birth at both 20 and 36. Her story is not just about resilience but about embracing life's unpredictability and finding strength in every chapter of motherhood.
Kelley's candid reflections on her pregnancies reveal the contrasting experiences of being an invincible college athlete at 19 and a more prepared mother at 36. The emotional rollercoaster of her first pregnancy, marked by vulnerability and youth, gave way to empowerment and clarity during her natural birth journey years later. With honesty and warmth, Kelley discusses the joys and challenges she faced, from navigating contractions to the unexpected pain of post-birth recovery—a journey that teaches invaluable lessons about personal growth and the unpredictable nature of childbirth.
Listeners will be inspired by Kelley's stories of teamwork with her husband during labor and her message of hope for mothers of all ages. Her experiences highlight the importance of personal choice and the beauty of natural birth, offering encouragement for anyone embarking on their own motherhood journey. Kelley's insights remind us that every birth story is unique and beautiful, and her episode is a celebration of resilience, love, and the power of embracing one's individual path.
Connect with Kelley Weinzetl
Music Credit
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https://uppbeat.io/t/dave-whitcroft/amazing-grace
https://uppbeat.io/t/the-lakes/thrive
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Stephanie Theriault (00:13):
Welcome to the Maternal Wealth Podcast, a
space for all things related tomaternal health, pregnancy and
beyond.
I'm your host, StephanieTheriault.
I'm a labor and delivery nurseand a mother to three beautiful
boys.
Each week, week, we dive intoinspiring stories and expert
insights to remind us of thepower that you hold in
childbirth and motherhood.
We're here to explore the joys,the challenges and the
(00:35):
complexities of maternal health.
Every mother's journey isunique and every story deserves
to be told.
Please note that this podcastis for entertainment purposes
only.
It is not intended to replaceprofessional medical advice,
diagnosis or treatment.
Always consult with yourhealthcare provider for medical
guidance that is tailored toyour specific needs.
(00:56):
Are you ready?
Let's get into it.
Today's guest is Kelley Weinzetl.
She She and I literally met acouple days ago on the phone.
(01:17):
I put on a feeler on Facebook,looking for women who are
interested in sharing theirbirth story.
She reached out and she's allabout it.
Kelly gave birth to herdaughter Juliana when she was 20
years old and then gave birthto her son, rhodes when she was
36 years old.
She shares the differences andthe similarities of having birth
(01:38):
in her early 20s and mid 30s.
You're gonna hear the fantasticstory of how her husband,
taylor, jumps right in to helpwith the birth of their son,
rhodes.
I'm excited for you to meetKelly and hear all about her
amazing birth story.
Welcome, kelly.
(02:00):
Thank you, stephanie, I'm soexcited to be here.
I think your story is going tobe great and I am excited for
everyone to hear If you couldtell us a little bit about
yourself, where you're from andwhy you wanted to be on the
podcast.
Yeah, I'd love to.
So I was born in California,but I was raised in a tiny
(02:22):
little town called Cowichie,washington.
I lived there for pretty muchmost of my growing up life, grew
up on a farm, chasing thechickens, riding horses, doing
all that fun stuff.
I loved it.
I would say I couldn't wait togo live in the city, though,
after growing up in the country,and now I live in Eagle, idaho,
(02:44):
which is a pretty decent sizedcity.
Now I've lived here since 2011.
It's right outside of Boise,idaho.
I love it, but I would say, nowthat I'm older and more mature
and have children, I my heartjust is like crying out for the
country.
So it's so funny how thathappens.
(03:05):
That's how I grew up and I am amom of two.
My background in the sense of mymotherhood journey.
I was going to college and Ihad a baby early at 20 years old
and was a single mom for 12years and was a single mom for
(03:29):
12 years.
I didn't date anyone for 10years we're actually a little
over 10 years and met my husbandand it was a one and done.
I remember praying to the Lord.
It was just like okay, I'm aone and done, girl, I just want
to date one person and marrythat person, and I had to wait
for 10 years and nine months forthat one person, but met him at
(03:52):
church of all places which youthink you're going to meet.
You'd never know where you'regoing to meet that person, but I
met him at church at a prayermeeting, which was awesome.
We got married and then we said, oh, we're going to wait for a
year to have a baby.
Well, four months into marriage, we got pregnant and now we
have our beautiful son that isgoing to be a year old here in a
couple of weeks, on February28th.
(04:13):
We're just in a season of justthriving and career wise.
I've worked in the medical fieldfor several years, since I was
pretty much 19 years old, and Ijust recently stepped away from
my corporate career as running amedical equipment company to
step away and help women, coachwomen to really go from
(04:35):
surviving life to thriving,which is what I did in my life
as a single mom and to just slaytheir goals.
Honestly, I reached all of mygoals that I was burning for as
a single mom before I reallyeven met my husband, and so it's
just such a passion of mine tohelp women reach their goals and
(04:56):
to step into the fullness oftheir identity.
So that is my passion, that'sdriving me right now and that's
also why I'm here, because whenI was 19, 20 year old, having my
first baby, I knew nothing andI just kind of gave into what
the society norms and medicalfield norms were of childbirth.
(05:18):
And now fast forward.
I am an empowered woman and Iwanted to have a natural birth
and I did it, even though it wasa challenge, for sure I did it.
And so I just here to share mystory about my birthing
experiences, the differences,but then also just helping women
feel empowered to have big,ambitious goals that maybe feel
(05:41):
intimidating or scary, but helpthem step into it and step into
the tension and wait and sitthere and accomplish and achieve
what matters most to them,without sacrificing family or
their core values.
I love all of it Surviving tothriving.
I love that, yes.
Kelley Weinzetl (05:59):
It's exciting.
Stephanie Theriault (06:01):
Let's get into your first pregnancy when
you were 19, 20 years old.
Let's get into your firstpregnancy when you were 19, 20
years old.
Share with us how that went foryou.
And then what advice would yougive to women who are 19, 20
years old, who are pregnant andso they can have an empowering
birth?
Kelley Weinzetl (06:16):
Yeah, so, to be fully transparent, back then,
you know, I was wild and I wasgoing into college.
I was playing soccer for mycollege.
I was on the first women'ssoccer team for my college,
which was so amazing, so fun.
Then I was also playingbasketball for my college as
well.
I was an athlete and with thatjust came with this untouchable
(06:42):
type of personality and just ontop of the world, I can do
anything, nothing's going tohappen, blah, blah, blah.
And then come to find out I waspregnant.
So that really put a halt onthings and was really scary.
Honestly, I remember I was justlike gosh, I haven't had my
period in a while and my boobsare really sore.
(07:04):
I better take a pregnancy test.
That's literally what mydialogue internally was.
So I went and took a pregnancytest in a Starbucks bathroom, of
all places, and it was positive.
And I quickly went back to thestore to get another one just to
make sure that was correct.
And it was.
And in that scenario I hadrecently broke up with my
(07:28):
boyfriend and so that was no funbeing single, finding out I'm
pregnant and no longer beingwith that person.
But fast forward a little bitand the pregnancy honestly went
super smooth.
I really didn't have anycomplications the whole time.
My pregnancy was a breeze.
(07:48):
The biggest part of it was themental being unmarried, being
young and the judgmental-ness ofsociety and everyone around you
.
Society's like oh yeah, go havefun, be free, do this, do that,
but then as soon as somethinglike a consequence of being
pregnant happens and it's likeall this judgment comes in and
(08:09):
so just that stress of feelingjudged, the shame of feeling
like gosh, I'm pregnant and I'monly 20 years old.
I'm 19 years old and that wasjust awful.
And then the uncertainty of howin the world am I going to even
raise a child?
How am I going to be able toprovide for a child?
I was just barely finishing myassociate's degree, so it was
(08:31):
just a very uncertain time and Iobviously was not with the
father at that time.
So eventually we did, in thepregnancy, get back together,
which was great during that time, but it was honestly very
tumultuous even still beingtogether.
But I would say, like speakingdirectly to a 19 year old, 20
year old that's pregnant thingsthat I like fully went through
(08:56):
was I had always been pro-life,always, and then I was pregnant
at 19 and 20 years old and I wasjust like boy okay, what does
this mean?
What does this mean for therest of my life?
And I remember when I was inthat Starbucks bathroom and I
had that positive pregnancy testand I remember fully thinking
(09:17):
my life is over.
My life is over.
Like I had so many aspirations.
I was hoping to go to playcollege soccer at Central
Washington University and I washoping that maybe, if that
didn't work out, I was going togo walk on at Boise State.
University was just had so manydreams ahead of me.
And now I was pregnant, had noplans and I just felt very alone
(09:42):
, very afraid and like my lifewas over.
But it was not.
And so through that time ofdeciding what to do, I just
really to the core of my beliefs.
I was just like I cannot makethis baby pay for my choice of
(10:04):
being irresponsible, me pay formy choice of being irresponsible
.
I can't make her pay for mebeing irresponsible in a moment
because I didn't think throughmy choices or I didn't protect,
or I didn't make the rightchoice.
That's not her fault.
So whether or not I raise heror not, it is not worth her life
(10:25):
for my moment ofirresponsibility.
That is not fair.
So that is just my full,transparent, like dialogue
within myself of why I chose tohave my baby and I was not going
to make my baby pay with herlife for my irresponsibility.
So I did choose to have my babyand then, when it came to like,
(10:48):
okay, am I going to raise mybaby or maybe give my daughter
as a gift through adoption tosomeone who can't have a baby or
who you know, something likethat I was just like I'm a very
like go getter type of personand I just knew that no one was
going to know how to parent mychild like I knew, and there was
(11:12):
no way I was going to trustsomeone else in the world to
parent her the way she needed tobe parented or loved or
cherished.
And so I just couldn't take therisk that she might not go to
the most loving family thatloved and cherished.
And so I just couldn't take therisk that she might not go to
the most loving family thatloved and cherished her.
And I knew that I could do that.
I didn't know how I was goingto provide for her, but I knew
(11:35):
myself and I trusted myself andI knew that God would help me.
And so I just was like nope,I'm having this baby, with or
without the father being in thisbaby's life, and I am going to
raise her as my own daughter andjust become the most powerful
woman that she could be.
And coming to the end of thatjourney, that was like a whole
(11:56):
beginning phase, right Of justthe pregnancy, like that was all
going on in the beginningtrimester of pregnancies.
But after all of that was saidand done, then it was just like
enjoying pregnancy.
(12:16):
And another thing I would sayto someone that's 19 years old
or 20, I remember, caught up inthat beginning phase, after I
decided, okay, I'm having thisbaby and I'm raising her, I
remember like feeling thatdisgusting shame and feeling
like I was naked and that peoplecould just like see the choices
(12:39):
I've made, and it just felt sogross Like there's not a better
word to put on it than justfeeling gross and I just
remember all of a sudden, justlike you know what?
What if this is my only child?
What if this is the only timeI'm pregnant?
I don't know if I'm going tohave more children, I don't know
when if I do have more childrenand if this is the only time
(13:03):
I'm going to be pregnant.
I want to have the bestpregnancy of my life.
I want to enjoy and savor everymoment, even though it feels
uncertain and scary.
And so I just put that shameand all that disgusting negative
energy away.
Honestly, I just like set itaside.
(13:24):
I was like that is not for meand this is how my pregnancy is
going to go.
And I loved it.
I mean, I loved being pregnant.
I love feeling my baby insideme.
I like I said my pregnancy wasvery easy, especially, I'm sure,
because I was so young.
I mean, I was in a bikini inAugust doing cannonballs and I
into the pool and I had herSeptember 6.
(13:46):
So I enjoyed it every second.
And I mean I put like thechairs together so my belly
would hang and so I could go tana little bit outside.
I was very young, young andsilly, but I thoroughly enjoyed
it.
But in that, that immaturity, Ialso thought when it came to
delivery, to labor, I was like,oh, I'm an athlete, this
(14:10):
shouldn't be a problem, I'm justgoing to, you know, one, two,
three push and it's going to befine.
And so I did zero prep fordelivery.
I just, you know, signed upwith an OB, started going to
that OB and that was it.
I did nothing.
I did no classes, I did nobooks, nothing.
(14:31):
And so when that came, yeah, itwas a learning curve, let me
tell you, it was a learningcurve for sure.
So my due date was September 4th.
I worked up until the day.
I worked out every single dayand I did not have her on
September 4th.
And so I thought, whenSeptember 4th came and gone, I
(14:51):
was like I'm never going to haveher, she's never going to come.
And especially since I had doneno research or investigation on
what labor delivery was, Ifully expected September 4th to
be the day and it wasn't, butonly thank goodness.
I only had to wait two moredays and my water broke at home
(15:13):
and that was wild feeling, likeit was.
Uh, we had gone to bed andcontractions were starting to go
or come on me, and then I feltthis rushing feeling and I ran
to the bathroom.
I was like gosh, that was weird.
And then I was walking back tomy bed and all of a sudden I
(15:35):
felt like that rushing feelingagain and my water had broke.
And then, man, as soon as thatwater broke, the contractions
were on.
It was go time.
Thankfully we live very closeto the hospital.
So we quickly loaded up in thecar, got to the hospital, got
(15:57):
into our room and, honestly,once we were like in the
hospital, the nurses were like,oh okay, we're going to put you
in a wheelchair and take you tothe room.
But I did know that I had in mymind was like no, I'm going to
be upright as long as possible,because I've heard of you know
so many people that have theirlabor stopped or whatever, and
(16:18):
they had to walk around.
So I was like, okay, I'm goingto walk everywhere I can.
So I insisted that I walk tothe room, which thoroughly
annoyed the nurses.
But I was like no, I'm walking.
And so we're walking to theroom and I like a contraction
would come and be like, oh, wait, wait.
So I'd have to like stand there, and that just annoyed them
(16:38):
even more.
So they like we're getting awheelchair.
So they came and got awheelchair, came put me in it,
and I kind of gave in justbecause I was like Alright, I
see how this can be difficultgetting to the room.
Yeah, so we get into the roomand I chose to do an epidural.
The whole reason behind anepidural was all I knew, was
(17:00):
fear.
That was the only thing I knewabout labor was it was going to
hurt and it's going to bepainful and you're going to be
screaming and it's pain, pain,pain.
That was all I knew and so Iwas like well, I'm absolutely
getting an epidural.
Then I don't want to be in pain.
So I got the epidural in andfor the most part was smooth
(17:25):
sailing and I just laid in thebed for you know hours.
Then, once it like was in for awhile, it did start to wear off
on my, like, left side of mybody so I had to get a booster.
And then you know, it's aboutsix hours, what have you?
(17:45):
And we're getting ready to pushor they're telling me, okay,
it's going to be time to pushand that epidural is wearing off
again on that side and it'spretty pinchy and burning and
all that.
And so during the whole likepushing phase, I just remember
it really felt like the epiduralhad worn off and was like full
(18:09):
feeling of things.
But at the same time I knew itwasn't, because now I've had a
baby, naturally, and it wasdefinitely not fully worn off,
but it took an hour and 20minutes to push my daughter out
and we did traditional, likeeverything was traditional,
because I knew nothing ofanything else.
So I was on my back the wholetime.
(18:31):
The baby she wasn't turning asfast as they wanted, so they did
use the vacuum, which I had noidea what that was or what the
complications could be, whichthank goodness I didn't know, I
guess, because that would havebeen terrifying, knowing that
that's what they were going touse.
But they use the vacuum and itwas really.
Honestly, putting the vacuum inor whatever they do down there
(18:52):
was excruciating, that was superpainful, but she came out in
like minutes and she was ahealthy, beautiful baby girl.
That was the beginning, or thefirst baby.
Stephanie Theriault (19:04):
I want to tell you something special.
I feel like this episode andyou and I were meant to meet.
I believe in numbers andbirthdays.
My oldest son, his birthday isSeptember 6th.
Kelley Weinzetl (19:15):
Oh my gosh, how fun, that is so cool.
How old is he?
Stephanie Theriault (19:19):
He is eight years old, that's so cute, so
how fun.
Kelley Weinzetl (19:23):
Yes, yes, gotta love those September babies.
Stephanie Theriault (19:32):
We paused this episode for a quick message
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How was your postpartum carelike?
The recovery?
Kelley Weinzetl (20:32):
So painful, that is for sure.
And oh, you'll love this.
So they had I believe it'scalled a boudet.
The hospital I stayed at waslike it had a beautiful big room
.
You birthed, labored and stayedin that same room and I had
also tested positive for I thinkit's the strep B.
So I ended up having to staythree days in the hospital, but
(20:53):
everything was fine.
But the thing about the Boudetthey were like, okay, well,
don't forget to turn it offbecause it'll flood your room.
I was like, okay, well, don'tforget to turn it off because
it'll flood your room.
I was like, okay, oh, you ofcourse know that first night
after I had my baby, I forgot toturn that bidet off.
I wake up, the whole room isflooded.
I was so embarrassed and I myboyfriend was sleeping on the
(21:15):
couch and so I seriously tookout every single linen towel,
was on my hands and knees,cleaning it up as fast as I
possibly could before a nursemight come in.
And I was like, because I was soembarrassed, I cleaned up the
whole room and my linen basketwas stuffed with every towel,
(21:36):
but there was not a drop ofwater.
Let me tell you on that, I'msure when the nurse came in she
was like, ah, she must've notturned that boot day off.
So when we got home, well,before we got home, you know I
was in the hospital and you know, going, uh, voiding was not too
bad, but when I was going tohave a bowel movement oh, good
(22:02):
Lord, the most painfulexperience ever wanted to cry my
eyes out, just like do I haveto ever do that again?
Like it was terrible.
So I did not expect that at all, so that was shocking.
Which now, knowing what I know,I'm like okay, like okay.
Well, I fully understand whythat was so painful did you have
(22:24):
any tearing?
no, thank goodness, no.
So and honestly, I think thatis mostly because my nurse I
knew my nurse.
She was my childhood friend'smom, which was cool and, um, she
spent time down there preparingthat tissue for being stretched
(22:45):
and I didn't know that's whatshe was doing until now, of
course, reflection, and I like,okay, that's what she was doing
and my mom was with me and soshe also had shared that.
She was also, you know, downthere like massaging and
stretching and doing things, andso I did not tear, which was
thank goodness.
I did not tear or have to havean episiotomy, so that was great
(23:08):
.
But the biggest thing was havinga bowel movement would like
send me into tears and it wasjust like give me so much
anxiety because it just hurts sobad.
For so long I did have to usesuppositories because it just
was.
It was that bad, it wasterrible, that part was the
(23:29):
hardest, but I did not bleedvery long, which was amazing,
and my body like came backquickly.
I only gained 18 pounds as a19-year-old, 20-year-old,
pregnant woman and I think Ilost the most I've ever lost in
my life Went from being like 150pounds down to 120.
(23:52):
It was pretty wild.
Just nursing.
I nursed for nine months sothere was like not an ounce of
fat on my body, sure fat baby,which was wonderful, I'm not
complaining but definitely adifferent experience compared to
being a 35, 36 year old womanhaving a baby.
For sure it was definitely aninteresting experience and I
(24:14):
would say the recovery as the 19year old, 20 year old, was way
more painful than it was as a 35, 36 year old woman.
Stephanie Theriault (24:24):
I'm excited to hear about the next birth
story.
Kelley Weinzetl (24:27):
Yes, okay.
So now let's fast forward rightAll those years.
And, to be honest, when I metmy husband, my daughter was 14
years old and, like I said, Ihad dated a guy or two, but I
had never had a boyfriend and Ihad purposed to stay single for
(24:47):
a long time because I wanted tofocus on my daughter.
I didn't want to focus on a guy.
I didn't want him.
In the way I grew up in a splitfamily.
My dad, he was like a habitualdater, so there was always a new
woman, not my mom.
My mom was kind of like me, oneand done, but I just didn't
want her to be in thisenvironment of constantly a new
(25:09):
guy in my life.
So I purposed to stay singlefor a very long time and then,
finally, I felt like I was ready, met my husband he did not want
kids and so I was like myhusband, he did not want kids.
And so I was like, yes, lord,this is him.
He was buff and just veryattractive, had this arm sleeve
tattoo.
He was into the Lord.
I mean, I met him at a prayermeeting.
(25:30):
So I was like, amen, he is herefor me.
I'm so excited.
And then, when I found out thathe was younger than me by five
years, which I had forever I waslike I will not date someone
younger, I won't do it.
And then, finally, I was likeall right, lord, I will not date
anyone younger than five years.
That's the cap.
He seriously is five yearsyounger than me.
(25:51):
It was like that, don't youthink you're so funny?
Stephanie Theriault (25:54):
Yeah, he was listening.
Kelley Weinzetl (25:56):
Yes, yes.
And so he was five yearsyounger, no kids, and didn't
want kids.
So it was like, all right, herewe go, this is awesome.
Well, he got around my daughterand he was like, ah, so you
(26:16):
know, I think I want to havekids.
Now I was like, well, I guessthat's a good thing, but, oh, my
goodness.
So he decided he wants to havekids.
I was like, all right, you know, I can't not allow you to be a
father of, you know, your ownflesh and blood.
So I was like, all right, we'llhave kids.
And so, like I said, we decided, okay, we're going to get
married, we're going to have ayear of just being married and
(26:38):
then we'll get pregnant.
Well, of course, four months in, we get pregnant.
And that was my fault, I likebroke the rules, but that's okay
.
And it was like, of course,like the one time, you couldn't
have done it more perfect.
And he's like, well, could yoube getting pregnant, like right
now?
I was like, well, yeah, if wewere trying to get pregnant,
this would be the day we wouldwant to probably do that.
(27:00):
And, of course, that justworked out.
So we had our baby, okay.
So the pregnancy was a lotdifferent, a lot different.
So I had zero nausea with mydaughter the first trimester.
I was very nauseous and I wasso sensitive to the sun Me and
my husband.
We had taken a trip to Arizonaand I love the heat, I love the
(27:24):
pool, I love that oh, my gosh, Iwas melting the whole time.
I was like I cannot, I can't,it's so hot.
I was such a baby I couldn't beout in the sun more than like
15 minutes.
It was ridiculous.
So that was crazy and I wasvery nauseous.
But thank goodness I did notthrow up my poor cousin.
She throws up nonstop her wholefirst trimester.
(27:46):
It's like, oh, I do not knowhow she does it.
She's had four kids, it's crazy.
So I was barely experiencingnausea.
I don't know how she does this.
So I had some nausea, but thatwas pretty much it.
And then second trimester, thatwas pretty easy no nausea
anymore.
So that was great.
And then third trimester, I likewould have those like lightning
(28:12):
feelings.
I didn't know what those wereand, holy cow, I just be like
stopping my tracks, like whatthe world was that and just,
literally, just, without lack ofbetter words, just felt like a
lightning strike in my crotch,like I remember going to TJ Maxx
(28:33):
with my husband.
We're looking for furniture orsomething and I seriously had to
sit in like their furnituresection on the couch and my
husband, like was going aroundthe store bringing me things
because I was like I can't.
I like either he's kicking mein the crotch for somehow or
something's happening because Icannot walk, and it was so
(28:53):
painful.
So those would happen sorandomly throughout the whole
third trimester, which was nuts.
And we did a road trip in mythird trimester too.
So he's from South Dakota andthat's about a 20 hour drive
from where we live and, not tomention, we did it in the winter
, which I would never do again.
(29:14):
But so we do this long roadtrip.
My ankles were fatter than fat,like I had elephant ankles.
It was ridiculous.
It was a fun time, but I willnever do that again.
So third trimester, I justdefinitely like those lightning
bolts to the crotch were a gamechanger for sure.
(29:36):
Going back to the firsttrimester, I seriously put on 10
pounds like instantly.
I was just like how, how, andit was like I really didn't have
cravings with my daughter.
I was all about Asian food,literally.
My husband was out of town andI ordered like five or six
different dishes, but I didn'twant to like anyone to know, so
(30:00):
I ordered them for takeout, forpickup, so I could take them
home and have them all spreadout and just eat from each of
them.
And I think I ate all six ofthose dishes for like four days.
But I loved Asian food.
But back to the third trimesteryeah, it was definite.
Swelling in the legs was crazy,crazy.
(30:23):
Like one day I came home fromwork and my right ankle was just
a balloon and I'm like, oh mygosh, I can't, this has got to
be wrong, because the otherankle was fine.
And so I like I took a pictureand sent it to my midwives and
they were like, oh, it's fine,it's you know, your baby's
probably just sitting in thisway or that way and and it's
totally normal thing.
(30:43):
But if something else happens,let us know.
And that's another thing that Idid.
Totally different was I wantedto have a natural birth and I
wanted to do it withoutmedication.
I am a very goal oriented girland I was just like okay, my
body was built for this, it'sdesigned for this.
I do not have to medicate it todo this.
I want to fully experience whatthe experience of birth is and,
(31:07):
plus, I am a Christian and myrelationship with the Lord is
very special, and I just waslike gosh.
The Lord designed me to givebirth, so I want to experience
what my body's design issupposed to do.
So I had like books andpodcasts that I listened to.
(31:37):
I did all the investigating andresearching this time and I
chose to go to midwife because Iwanted it to be along that
natural line, and so I felt likea midwife experience would give
me that more than going to anOB, and I also wanted to still
go in the hospital, even thoughI wanted that natural experience
(32:00):
.
It'd been a hot second, since Ihad my first baby, so I wanted
that expertise to be there justin case I needed help or
something went wrong.
I wanted to have the help justright there, not to have to hop
in a car and drive and thenhopefully something doesn't bad
(32:21):
happen in that process.
So that's why I chose midwifeand that's why I chose to do it
in the hospital and not a homebirth or something like that.
My midwives were amazing, andthe most wonderful thing that I
loved is they did not insist onvaginal checks at all the whole
time.
I loved that.
(32:41):
I was just like, oh my gosh,this is great, I love it.
So I fully enjoyed it nothaving to do that at all
whatsoever one time.
So that was amazing.
And my first appointment goingin the midwife was like so now
that you're 35,?
But the midwife was like so nowthat you're 35, you're a
geriatric Like what?
(33:03):
So I went from pretty much anadolescent pregnancy to a
geriatric pregnancy, which waslike that's rude.
Who dubbed it geriatric?
That is totally rude.
But I was like, fine, whatever.
So that was kind of comical.
I was a geriatric pregnancy.
Yeah, it's like someone needsto rename that in the medical
field.
(33:23):
Iw, go make someone change that.
Stephanie Theriault (33:27):
Seriously.
Kelley Weinzetl (33:28):
It should not be geriatric, but yeah.
So the third trimester, theswelling was crazy, but it was.
It was, it was fine, but it wasjust like kind of more
uncomfortable at the end justbecause it felt like my legs
were so full, if that makessense.
So my baby was due Valentine'sDay, which was so fun, but he
(33:50):
did not come on Valentine's Day,let me tell you.
He decided to come two weekslater when we had to evict him
and I had to be induced.
Some people might say, well, youdidn't have a natural birth
because you had to be induced,and I'm still qualifying it as a
natural birth because I hadzero medication for pain relief.
(34:11):
I'll say that because I guessPitocin, you'd probably say, is
a medication of sorts.
So yes, say is a medication ofsorts.
So, yes, valentine's Day comesand goes, no baby.
I wait the whole two weeks, nobaby.
And during that time I did haveultrasounds and they would
check the baby to make sureeverything was fine, which was
good.
(34:31):
They did say that my, what isit?
The placenta, I believe, wasstarting to calcify.
So they were just keeping aneye on that and through those
two weeks and then ultimately wecame to that last day of just
she did a membrane sweep andthat I thought was going to be
very painful and uncomfortableand it actually really didn't
(34:52):
hurt at all.
So that was a wonderfulsurprise.
But it was way bloodier than Iexpected.
But that happened.
I had some light cramping andthat was it, no action.
So he was not coming out.
It was freezing here, so hemust've just been cold, right,
wanted to stay warm and cozy inthere.
So then the next morning at 7am we had to go in and be.
(35:15):
I was induced for that.
But the inducing processthankfully it was all pretty
smooth and easy.
I didn't know too much aboutinduction or being induced.
That wasn't something I hadreally researched because I
didn't expect that.
I expected with my firstdaughter I was two days late, so
(35:36):
I figured I'd probably be twodays late, which wasn't the case
.
Come to find out I know I toldyou before, but come to find out
my husband had been two weekslate, his older sister had been
two weeks late and then hisyounger sisters.
One was a week late and thenthe last one she was induced.
But my midwives had said it canbe familial.
So I was like, oh my gosh, thisis your fault that I'm two
(35:58):
weeks late because of you, butit was fine.
So we go in and we chose theballoon because my midwife
explained, you know we could dothis.
I think it's like a chemical orsomething or a hormone of sorts
that they put in and she saidonce you do that you can't take
that back because it's absorbedinto the body.
(36:19):
And if your body doesn't likethat, there's really not too
much you can do, there's nogoing back.
And then you have to wait somany hours before you can do
another technique to induce.
So I was just like, well, let'sdefinitely not do that.
So we did the balloon.
That did not hurt at all, Iwill say mortifying the position
(36:41):
you have to be in to do thatand I definitely cried because
it was just like.
I think I was just so caught upin like I wanted everything to
be natural.
I wanted my water to breaknatural, I wanted to go into
labor natural, I wanted to havemy baby fully natural and I
couldn't with being induced andso I didn't want any IVs and
(37:03):
being induced.
You have to have now an IV.
You have to have monitors.
I didn't want monitors, Iwanted to be the pain in the
booty, patient for the nurse,where it's like I don't want
anything and all of a sudden I'mhaving all the things.
And so I was.
I think it was mostly just likethe position you have to be in
to get the balloon.
But then also, you know, myhopes of having this full
(37:26):
experience being natural wasgoing away.
But you know that, thankfully,my midwife was amazing.
If you're in Boise, her name isMegan Kitterman.
She works at Idaho Stork.
She's awesome, go to her.
But she did great.
My balloon, getting that put indid not hurt at all and they
still allowed me to wear my owngown and my own socks, so I
(37:48):
didn't have to wear the hospitalgown or anything like that.
But it did feel like not thebest having this thing taped to
my leg and like being pulled,and it just felt so you know,
for lack of better terms againgross, like this thing just
coming out of me and pulling onme.
But to speed it up a little bit, that was in for probably three
(38:10):
to four hours and then my waterbroke and you know, during that
beginning phase everything waslike pretty calm.
My contractions I didn't reallyfeel them at all and everything
was going smooth.
I was on the ball most of thattime too, like a yoga type ball,
bouncing around and walkingaround and all of that.
But then once my water broke,they upped the Pitocin and, man,
(38:34):
the contractions.
It was go time again.
That definitely didn't changethe contractions.
It was go time again.
That definitely didn't change.
That was for sure the same withthis pregnancy or this delivery
as well.
My husband he absolutely wantsnothing to do with anything
woman stuff like periods andthings like that and he was such
a help.
He was like all hands on deckthe whole time.
(38:55):
So that was amazing.
I'd be on the ball, he'd bebehind me and he put counter
pressure on my pelvis and I hada heating pad that I was using
on the front or the back, sothat helped.
And then once that stoppedworking, we were going to
transition to the bathtub.
So thankfully, my hospital didhave a bathtub, so the nurse got
(39:17):
that already.
Thankfully, my hospital didhave a bathtub, so the nurse got
that already.
I got in the bath and I'm likebutt naked in the bath and I
remember like at one point Iopened my eyes, because once
those contractions started, Idon't think I really opened my
eyes, except for like here orthere.
My eyes were closed shut thewhole time and I had read Ina
(39:40):
May's book about childbirth andso I knew, like a lot of
techniques of like giving thatlike deep, like you know noise
and doing raspberries and justhow that's connected to the
cervix and to soften and allowit to dilate faster.
So my mindset the whole timewas just making those deep
(40:01):
voices, doing the raspberries tosoften and to open the cervix
and to just welcome contractionsas a partner to birth and that
they're not my enemy and all ofthose things.
But then also, you know, Iwanted to get in the bath so
that all that tissue was niceand soft and to help pain
(40:21):
management to another painmanagement technique.
So we get in the bath, I'm inthere and man, I'm not a tall
woman but I have some long legsand that was kind of a pain.
I had to have my legs all likebent, funny to be in the tub.
I'm like sweating and my eyesare like closed shut just
because I'm like concentratingand I like open them for a
(40:43):
second and there's like fivepeople in this tiny bathroom,
including my 17 year olddaughter that's seeing her mom
butt naked.
I'm like trying to get throughthis and it's like pretty
painful at this moment and I'mjust like, whose big idea was
this to have this natural birth?
And I'm like, okay, it was mine.
(41:03):
And so I'm like they had toldme that, you know, I could say a
word or whatever, let them know, and they could give me this
like drug.
That would be like having aglass of wine, where it would
just take a little bit of theedge off.
And so I was kind of likereally thinking that.
And then I was like no, you arehere to have a natural birth.
You can do this.
You were made for this, youwere built for this.
(41:25):
You're not giving up now andyou will regret it if you do.
So I was like all right, we'renot doing that.
And I'm in the bathtub forever.
Get out of the bathtub becauseI'm like sweating hot.
And now I'm like, fine, I'llput on your gown, because my
gown, like I didn't want to putthat back on because it was
actually not the best, like withthe IV, it was kind of a pain.
(41:47):
So we put on the hospital gown,which I really did not care
about Actually.
Yeah, yeah, we did.
And then, because at one point Ididn't have a gown on at all, I
can't remember, but eventuallyI'm like butt naked the whole
time walking around and I neverimagined that that would have
been me, but it was like Ididn't want anything on.
(42:08):
Then we like get over to thetable or the not the table but
the bed and we do the peanutball.
My husband's pretty much justmoving my body at this point and
putting me where I need to go.
So it was amazing to have himto just like get me in the right
positions.
But I'm on my side, have thepeanut ball, flip to the other
side, peanut ball in between mylegs and like one legs up in a
(42:32):
stirrup.
So it's like I can only imaginewhat this looks like.
But I'm covered with a blanket,thank goodness, and all the
while I really wanted to haveworship music and I romanticized
this birth experience.
So I had like this playlist andall the things, worship music
blasting.
And while I'm on the peanut ballon the other side, all of a
(42:54):
sudden I'm like listening to themusic and it's in Spanish, so
like the playlist must haveended and it just started
playing whatever music underChristian was coming up, because
I knew the like I could hearthe music.
So I knew the song, but it wasin Spanish.
I'm like this is hilarious.
This like is in the background,but that was just like a funny
(43:18):
moment where it's just like arewe listening to Spanish music
right now?
That is hilarious.
Hilarious because none of usknow Spanish.
So the contractions are prettyintense still, and now, finally,
I'm going through a contractionand my body pushes.
That was wild, because when Ihad the epidural I could not
feel that at all.
(43:39):
So my body all of a suddentransitions from this like
painful experience to a push,and I was just I knew that I was
supposed to tell them, so I waslike my body just pushed.
So they're like okay.
So they switched me to thebirthing chair.
So I scooted down.
My husband sat behind me andI'm in this birthing chair
(43:59):
squatting.
They've got like a mirrorunderneath me the whole bit, a
flashlight, because we have thelights down low and they're down
there looking to see likewhat's going on.
And so we pushed forever inthat birthing chair and the
funny thing was or maybe notfunny, but the cool thing was
that it didn't hurt anymore whenit changed from contractions to
(44:21):
open the cervix to contractionsto push the baby.
Now it didn't hurt, it was justexhausting because every muscle
, every fiber of my body wasshaking every push and I'd have
like a short one and then areally long one.
So and then I transitioned frommaking those noises to just
pushing everything, all myeffort into that push.
(44:42):
So, birthing chair we were therefor quite a while and we
weren't getting anywhere fast.
So they wanted to check me.
So I got up on the bed againand the midwife saw that the
like lip of the cervix was onhis edge of his head or
something like that.
So we did a couple pushes toget that manipulated down, which
(45:03):
didn't hurt, but it just likewas pretty difficult, but that
was the only time.
I was on my back the whole time.
And then after that they wantedme to try to go to the bathroom
.
So I waddle over to the toilet,I'm on the bath or on the
toilet and a contraction comesand I think, because I was
(45:24):
higher up and I could hold ontothe handrail man, I pushed and
he like dropped with, like rightinto.
They say, when the baby's aboutto come out, you're going to
feel like he's in your butt.
And OMG, like I was, like he'sin my butt, he's like right
there.
It was like a melon between mylegs.
It was.
It was crazy.
And my, my midwife is rightnext to me and I was like I'm
(45:45):
going to have him right here onthe toilet.
She's like no, you're not,you're going to, you're going to
make it back to the bed.
I was like I don't know if Ican get up, get over to the
table and this time she wants meon all fours.
So I'm on my hands and knees onthe bed.
My husband, in throughout thiswhole process of pregnancy, has
(46:08):
decided that he's going to catchour baby, deliver our baby,
which was beautiful.
So he's getting ready todeliver the baby and I'm on all
fours and the baby like goesback up.
So now I'm mad because the babyis like not there anymore, my
gosh, darn it.
So I'm on all fours, I do acouple pushes, I can feel he's
there.
And I was just like, once Ifelt him there, I was like he is
(46:30):
not going anywhere.
So I was just like determined,I'm not waiting for another
contraction, this baby is comingout.
And so I'm pushing with like allmy might.
I can feel him crowning and Ican hear my midwife saying, like
you know, I think it's like midor mild and then medium and
then full crown, and she's likeslow down, slow down, slow down.
(46:50):
So I like slow down, which Ididn't think I could do that,
but I was able to slow down andthen pushed him out his head and
then got his shoulders out.
And then, after he came out,they're like okay, flip over.
So I'm like okay, so I flipover onto my back and they put
him on my belly and that waslike intense, just like all of
(47:14):
that movement.
And then he's on my stomach andI really wanted him to like get
the full what do you call it?
Like the full blood from theplacenta and so they waited for
the cord to go white and theysaid when the cord's white, then
it's done.
So that only took a few minutes.
(47:34):
Then my husband cut the cord andthen we really wanted the baby
to do, my baby to do the breastcrawl, which was magical.
But the poor little guy, he waslike cold, I guess, and so he
would breast crawl over and thenthey would be like, oh he's
cold and move him back to themiddle of my chest.
So the poor guy had to breastcrawl three times, but but he
(47:57):
did it.
So if you're wondering ifbabies do it, oh yes, they do,
and he had to do it three darntimes.
So we got to do the breastcrawl, which was beautiful and
yeah, so it was just a beautifulexperience.
And he was born at 6 pm on thedot.
So that was the experience.
It was beautiful.
I would absolutely have anotherbaby natural, all hands down,
(48:22):
like for sure, and I think everywoman should at least
experience it one time, even ifthey don't do it again natural.
But I think it's just abeautiful thing what our bodies
do in birth.
Stephanie Theriault (48:33):
It was amazing just listening to your
story gives me goosebumps,because it is such an empowering
story to hear.
And when you talk about at thebeginning like fear, right,
(48:55):
there's so many of us go into itfearful and it's just an
experience we go through andthen we come out on the other
side empowered and you hear ittime and time again like I would
do that again.
I would do that again, and it'sso.
Once you go through it, you caneven describe it right, right,
(49:16):
I love it.
Kelley Weinzetl (49:17):
A magical experience, like, truly like it
just just what our bodies can do, really, even just the process
of dilating and how big it hasto get down there and then how
small it gets again, and justhow your body's going to do it,
regardless if you're going topartner with it or not.
So you might as well justchoose to partner with it and
(49:38):
help it do its job, and it'sjust such a gift for your baby
too, like I don't know.
It is just amazing.
I think just the wholepregnancy, birthing,
breastfeeding, all of it is justso mind-blowing.
What our bodies are built to do.
It's just amazing.
Stephanie Theriault (50:01):
I love the fact that your midwife was open
to letting your husband glove upand help catch his child.
I love that she was open tothat.
Kelley Weinzetl (50:09):
He did and she was just totally about it and he
was getting gloved up.
And then I don't know why, buthe was like, well, do I have to
wear gloves?
And they said no, and so theman that can't even talk about
periods decides he's not goingto wear gloves and to deliver
this baby.
And he did, and he deliveredhim just fine.
(50:30):
And listening to him tell thestory is hilarious.
He's like I was like pickingthings off and it was just
disgusting but beautiful at thesame time.
So it's just yeah, and we loveto be able to tell so many
people that he delivered thebaby and they're like, oh, we
didn't even know, that was anoption.
And it's our pregnancy, it'sour baby, it's our delivery.
(50:51):
We've hired them to just helpand assist and that's really
where the empowerment should beand assist and that's really
where the empowerment should be.
Unfortunately, it's not thatway for some cases, but it's
just like and that's something Ivery much learned this is my
birth, this is my baby, this ismy body and, without being
(51:12):
snotty or mean or rude, I wantto do it my way, but of course,
I've hired you to be here toadvise me and guide me, and if
that's not the best routeanymore, then, yes, intervene
and say, okay, this is actually,let's do this for you and your
baby's safety, or whatever.
(51:32):
It's an empowering journey,that is for sure.
And postpartum was amazingbecause, in my opinion, I wasn't
laying on my back for hours onend and during the birthing and
delivery my baby wasn't on myorgans, you know the colon, the
rectum.
(51:52):
Her pressure wasn't laying onthat for an hour and a half
going through the birthing canal.
Instead, I was on everyposition you possibly can
imagine, except for on my back,maybe like five minutes on my
back, and so I did not havetrouble at all going voiding, I
didn't have any trouble doing abowel movement, no pain at all
(52:15):
whatsoever, but I bled for likea month.
I was like, oh my gosh, am Iever going to stop bleeding With
my daughter?
I think I bled for like a weekNow, at 30, you know I was 36 by
the time I birthed him and Ilike bled for literally like a
(52:38):
month.
That was so obnoxious and Iwould say, the first time no one
gave me an ice pack or likeeven offered an ice pack, nor
did they suggest like oh, usethis squirt bottle.
I had the bidet, but, no, nosquirt bottle.
Well, because I had done allthe like research, man, I had my
whole kit, all this stuff, butthe hospital here in Boise, st
(53:01):
Luke's, downtown, they had amillion ice packs for you, so
that was awesome.
And then they had a squirtbottle, they had this, they had
that, all these things that youcould use.
They sent you home with specialunderwear that you could wear,
which I was like, oh, I'm neverwearing those and I wore them
like every day.
Can I have some more, please?
Dignity, it goes out the window.
(53:22):
It's just like what is the mostconvenient thing and that those
are so convenient.
But, and I would say, the onething that was way more
difficult this time around wasbreastfeeding With my daughter.
Breastfeeding was so easy, sheknew exactly what she was doing
and my milk came in likegangbusters, like it was
(53:44):
overflowing milk, and this timeit took like a week for my milk
to come in, and so it was like Imean it was my milk has been
fine, but it just was such amental game like feeling like is
my milk in, is it not in?
Is he been fine?
But it just was such a mentalgame Like feeling like is my
(54:05):
milk in?
Is it not in?
Is he getting enough?
Is he just cluster feeding?
And I forgot that, how babiescluster feed, and I think maybe
my daughter didn't do it as muchbecause I had so much milk
Whereas there was just like justenough for the beginning.
He didn't really lose weight sowe never had an issue.
But I just remember it just wasway more difficult and mentally
(54:27):
draining to breastfeed thistime in the beginning because my
milk didn't come in ever fullgangbusters where it's just like
there's so much extra.
It was just enough the wholetime, which kind of is a
blessing now that I look at it,because then I didn't have to
pump and do all of this.
(54:48):
It just was enough.
Stephanie Theriault (54:51):
It was what your baby needed.
Kelley Weinzetl (54:52):
Exactly so, yeah, so the second round was
beautiful and I liked postpartummuch better.
The second round, let me tellyou.
Stephanie Theriault (55:02):
Well, kelly , it's been such a pleasure
chatting with you.
I hear your passion and I lovethat you trusted your body and I
love that you are opening upand sharing to women who are
listening to the podcast, toyoung women who have found
themselves pregnant at 19, 20and listening to your story, so
they'd feel like they're notalone and can hear your words
(55:23):
and your advice, and I lovedhearing about your second birth
going all natural and invitingyour husband to be a part of it.
It's just been an absolutepleasure.
Kelley Weinzetl (55:33):
Thank you.
Yes, it has been so fun torelive it and to tell it and to
share, and I just hope itencourages anyone that's young
and in that position that youcan do it.
You were built for this andthere are resources out there to
help you and you can absolutelydo it.
And if you're older and findingyourself pregnant, you can
(55:54):
absolutely do it too, like it isa birth, pregnancy, labor.
All of it is a beautiful thing,and I just hope that they're
all inspired and hopeful andfilled with excitement about
their journey.
Stephanie Theriault (56:09):
And Kelly.
If there's baby number threecoming along the way, make sure
you reach out to me.
Kelley Weinzetl (56:14):
I will.
I will for sure.
Stephanie Theriault (56:17):
All right, thank you.
Kelley Weinzetl (56:18):
Thank you.
Stephanie Theriault (56:29):
Thank you for listening.
Be sure to check out our socialmedia.
All links are provided in theepisode description.
We're excited to have you here.
Please give us a follow If youor someone you know would like
to be a guest on the show.
Reach out to us via email atinfo at maternalwealthcom.
And remember stay healthy,embrace your power and you got
(56:53):
this, thank you.
Welcome to the Maternal Wealth Podcast, a
space for all things related tomaternal health, pregnancy and
beyond.
I'm your host, StephanieTheriault.
I'm a labor and delivery nurseand a mother to three beautiful
boys.
Each week, week, we dive intoinspiring stories and expert
insights to remind us of thepower that you hold in
childbirth and motherhood.
We're here to explore the joys,the challenges and the
(00:35):
complexities of maternal health.
Every mother's journey isunique and every story deserves
to be told.
Please note that this podcastis for entertainment purposes
only.
It is not intended to replaceprofessional medical advice,
diagnosis or treatment.
Always consult with yourhealthcare provider for medical
guidance that is tailored toyour specific needs.
(00:56):
Are you ready?
Let's get into it.
Today's guest is Kelley Weinzetl.
She She and I literally met acouple days ago on the phone.
(01:17):
I put on a feeler on Facebook,looking for women who are
interested in sharing theirbirth story.
She reached out and she's allabout it.
Kelly gave birth to herdaughter Juliana when she was 20
years old and then gave birthto her son, rhodes when she was
36 years old.
She shares the differences andthe similarities of having birth
(01:38):
in her early 20s and mid 30s.
You're gonna hear the fantasticstory of how her husband,
taylor, jumps right in to helpwith the birth of their son,
rhodes.
I'm excited for you to meetKelly and hear all about her
amazing birth story.
Welcome, kelly.
(02:00):
Thank you, stephanie, I'm soexcited to be here.
I think your story is going tobe great and I am excited for
everyone to hear If you couldtell us a little bit about
yourself, where you're from andwhy you wanted to be on the
podcast.
Yeah, I'd love to.
So I was born in California,but I was raised in a tiny
(02:22):
little town called Cowichie,washington.
I lived there for pretty muchmost of my growing up life, grew
up on a farm, chasing thechickens, riding horses, doing
all that fun stuff.
I loved it.
I would say I couldn't wait togo live in the city, though,
after growing up in the country,and now I live in Eagle, idaho,
(02:44):
which is a pretty decent sizedcity.
Now I've lived here since 2011.
It's right outside of Boise,idaho.
I love it, but I would say, nowthat I'm older and more mature
and have children, I my heartjust is like crying out for the
country.
So it's so funny how thathappens.
(03:05):
That's how I grew up and I am amom of two.
My background in the sense of mymotherhood journey.
I was going to college and Ihad a baby early at 20 years old
and was a single mom for 12years and was a single mom for
(03:29):
12 years.
I didn't date anyone for 10years we're actually a little
over 10 years and met my husbandand it was a one and done.
I remember praying to the Lord.
It was just like okay, I'm aone and done, girl, I just want
to date one person and marrythat person, and I had to wait
for 10 years and nine months forthat one person, but met him at
(03:52):
church of all places which youthink you're going to meet.
You'd never know where you'regoing to meet that person, but I
met him at church at a prayermeeting, which was awesome.
We got married and then we said, oh, we're going to wait for a
year to have a baby.
Well, four months into marriage, we got pregnant and now we
have our beautiful son that isgoing to be a year old here in a
couple of weeks, on February28th.
(04:13):
We're just in a season of justthriving and career wise.
I've worked in the medical fieldfor several years, since I was
pretty much 19 years old, and Ijust recently stepped away from
my corporate career as running amedical equipment company to
step away and help women, coachwomen to really go from
(04:35):
surviving life to thriving,which is what I did in my life
as a single mom and to just slaytheir goals.
Honestly, I reached all of mygoals that I was burning for as
a single mom before I reallyeven met my husband, and so it's
just such a passion of mine tohelp women reach their goals and
(04:56):
to step into the fullness oftheir identity.
So that is my passion, that'sdriving me right now and that's
also why I'm here, because whenI was 19, 20 year old, having my
first baby, I knew nothing andI just kind of gave into what
the society norms and medicalfield norms were of childbirth.
(05:18):
And now fast forward.
I am an empowered woman and Iwanted to have a natural birth
and I did it, even though it wasa challenge, for sure I did it.
And so I just here to share mystory about my birthing
experiences, the differences,but then also just helping women
feel empowered to have big,ambitious goals that maybe feel
(05:41):
intimidating or scary, but helpthem step into it and step into
the tension and wait and sitthere and accomplish and achieve
what matters most to them,without sacrificing family or
their core values.
I love all of it Surviving tothriving.
I love that, yes.
Kelley Weinzetl (05:59):
It's exciting.
Stephanie Theriault (06:01):
Let's get into your first pregnancy when
you were 19, 20 years old.
Let's get into your firstpregnancy when you were 19, 20
years old.
Share with us how that went foryou.
And then what advice would yougive to women who are 19, 20
years old, who are pregnant andso they can have an empowering
birth?
Kelley Weinzetl (06:16):
Yeah, so, to be fully transparent, back then,
you know, I was wild and I wasgoing into college.
I was playing soccer for mycollege.
I was on the first women'ssoccer team for my college,
which was so amazing, so fun.
Then I was also playingbasketball for my college as
well.
I was an athlete and with thatjust came with this untouchable
(06:42):
type of personality and just ontop of the world, I can do
anything, nothing's going tohappen, blah, blah, blah.
And then come to find out I waspregnant.
So that really put a halt onthings and was really scary.
Honestly, I remember I was justlike gosh, I haven't had my
period in a while and my boobsare really sore.
(07:04):
I better take a pregnancy test.
That's literally what mydialogue internally was.
So I went and took a pregnancytest in a Starbucks bathroom, of
all places, and it was positive.
And I quickly went back to thestore to get another one just to
make sure that was correct.
And it was.
And in that scenario I hadrecently broke up with my
(07:28):
boyfriend and so that was no funbeing single, finding out I'm
pregnant and no longer beingwith that person.
But fast forward a little bitand the pregnancy honestly went
super smooth.
I really didn't have anycomplications the whole time.
My pregnancy was a breeze.
(07:48):
The biggest part of it was themental being unmarried, being
young and the judgmental-ness ofsociety and everyone around you
.
Society's like oh yeah, go havefun, be free, do this, do that,
but then as soon as somethinglike a consequence of being
pregnant happens and it's likeall this judgment comes in and
(08:09):
so just that stress of feelingjudged, the shame of feeling
like gosh, I'm pregnant and I'monly 20 years old.
I'm 19 years old and that wasjust awful.
And then the uncertainty of howin the world am I going to even
raise a child?
How am I going to be able toprovide for a child?
I was just barely finishing myassociate's degree, so it was
(08:31):
just a very uncertain time and Iobviously was not with the
father at that time.
So eventually we did, in thepregnancy, get back together,
which was great during that time, but it was honestly very
tumultuous even still beingtogether.
But I would say, like speakingdirectly to a 19 year old, 20
year old that's pregnant thingsthat I like fully went through
(08:56):
was I had always been pro-life,always, and then I was pregnant
at 19 and 20 years old and I wasjust like boy okay, what does
this mean?
What does this mean for therest of my life?
And I remember when I was inthat Starbucks bathroom and I
had that positive pregnancy testand I remember fully thinking
(09:17):
my life is over.
My life is over.
Like I had so many aspirations.
I was hoping to go to playcollege soccer at Central
Washington University and I washoping that maybe, if that
didn't work out, I was going togo walk on at Boise State.
University was just had so manydreams ahead of me.
And now I was pregnant, had noplans and I just felt very alone
(09:42):
, very afraid and like my lifewas over.
But it was not.
And so through that time ofdeciding what to do, I just
really to the core of my beliefs.
I was just like I cannot makethis baby pay for my choice of
(10:04):
being irresponsible, me pay formy choice of being irresponsible
.
I can't make her pay for mebeing irresponsible in a moment
because I didn't think throughmy choices or I didn't protect,
or I didn't make the rightchoice.
That's not her fault.
So whether or not I raise heror not, it is not worth her life
(10:25):
for my moment ofirresponsibility.
That is not fair.
So that is just my full,transparent, like dialogue
within myself of why I chose tohave my baby and I was not going
to make my baby pay with herlife for my irresponsibility.
So I did choose to have my babyand then, when it came to like,
(10:48):
okay, am I going to raise mybaby or maybe give my daughter
as a gift through adoption tosomeone who can't have a baby or
who you know, something likethat I was just like I'm a very
like go getter type of personand I just knew that no one was
going to know how to parent mychild like I knew, and there was
(11:12):
no way I was going to trustsomeone else in the world to
parent her the way she needed tobe parented or loved or
cherished.
And so I just couldn't take therisk that she might not go to
the most loving family thatloved and cherished.
And so I just couldn't take therisk that she might not go to
the most loving family thatloved and cherished her.
And I knew that I could do that.
I didn't know how I was goingto provide for her, but I knew
(11:35):
myself and I trusted myself andI knew that God would help me.
And so I just was like nope,I'm having this baby, with or
without the father being in thisbaby's life, and I am going to
raise her as my own daughter andjust become the most powerful
woman that she could be.
And coming to the end of thatjourney, that was like a whole
(11:56):
beginning phase, right Of justthe pregnancy, like that was all
going on in the beginningtrimester of pregnancies.
But after all of that was saidand done, then it was just like
enjoying pregnancy.
(12:16):
And another thing I would sayto someone that's 19 years old
or 20, I remember, caught up inthat beginning phase, after I
decided, okay, I'm having thisbaby and I'm raising her, I
remember like feeling thatdisgusting shame and feeling
like I was naked and that peoplecould just like see the choices
(12:39):
I've made, and it just felt sogross Like there's not a better
word to put on it than justfeeling gross and I just
remember all of a sudden, justlike you know what?
What if this is my only child?
What if this is the only timeI'm pregnant?
I don't know if I'm going tohave more children, I don't know
when if I do have more childrenand if this is the only time
(13:03):
I'm going to be pregnant.
I want to have the bestpregnancy of my life.
I want to enjoy and savor everymoment, even though it feels
uncertain and scary.
And so I just put that shameand all that disgusting negative
energy away.
Honestly, I just like set itaside.
(13:24):
I was like that is not for meand this is how my pregnancy is
going to go.
And I loved it.
I mean, I loved being pregnant.
I love feeling my baby insideme.
I like I said my pregnancy wasvery easy, especially, I'm sure,
because I was so young.
I mean, I was in a bikini inAugust doing cannonballs and I
into the pool and I had herSeptember 6.
(13:46):
So I enjoyed it every second.
And I mean I put like thechairs together so my belly
would hang and so I could go tana little bit outside.
I was very young, young andsilly, but I thoroughly enjoyed
it.
But in that, that immaturity, Ialso thought when it came to
delivery, to labor, I was like,oh, I'm an athlete, this
(14:10):
shouldn't be a problem, I'm justgoing to, you know, one, two,
three push and it's going to befine.
And so I did zero prep fordelivery.
I just, you know, signed upwith an OB, started going to
that OB and that was it.
I did nothing.
I did no classes, I did nobooks, nothing.
(14:31):
And so when that came, yeah, itwas a learning curve, let me
tell you, it was a learningcurve for sure.
So my due date was September 4th.
I worked up until the day.
I worked out every single dayand I did not have her on
September 4th.
And so I thought, whenSeptember 4th came and gone, I
(14:51):
was like I'm never going to haveher, she's never going to come.
And especially since I had doneno research or investigation on
what labor delivery was, Ifully expected September 4th to
be the day and it wasn't, butonly thank goodness.
I only had to wait two moredays and my water broke at home
(15:13):
and that was wild feeling, likeit was.
Uh, we had gone to bed andcontractions were starting to go
or come on me, and then I feltthis rushing feeling and I ran
to the bathroom.
I was like gosh, that was weird.
And then I was walking back tomy bed and all of a sudden I
(15:35):
felt like that rushing feelingagain and my water had broke.
And then, man, as soon as thatwater broke, the contractions
were on.
It was go time.
Thankfully we live very closeto the hospital.
So we quickly loaded up in thecar, got to the hospital, got
(15:57):
into our room and, honestly,once we were like in the
hospital, the nurses were like,oh okay, we're going to put you
in a wheelchair and take you tothe room.
But I did know that I had in mymind was like no, I'm going to
be upright as long as possible,because I've heard of you know
so many people that have theirlabor stopped or whatever, and
(16:18):
they had to walk around.
So I was like, okay, I'm goingto walk everywhere I can.
So I insisted that I walk tothe room, which thoroughly
annoyed the nurses.
But I was like no, I'm walking.
And so we're walking to theroom and I like a contraction
would come and be like, oh, wait, wait.
So I'd have to like stand there, and that just annoyed them
(16:38):
even more.
So they like we're getting awheelchair.
So they came and got awheelchair, came put me in it,
and I kind of gave in justbecause I was like Alright, I
see how this can be difficultgetting to the room.
Yeah, so we get into the roomand I chose to do an epidural.
The whole reason behind anepidural was all I knew, was
(17:00):
fear.
That was the only thing I knewabout labor was it was going to
hurt and it's going to bepainful and you're going to be
screaming and it's pain, pain,pain.
That was all I knew and so Iwas like well, I'm absolutely
getting an epidural.
Then I don't want to be in pain.
So I got the epidural in andfor the most part was smooth
(17:25):
sailing and I just laid in thebed for you know hours.
Then, once it like was in for awhile, it did start to wear off
on my, like, left side of mybody so I had to get a booster.
And then you know, it's aboutsix hours, what have you?
(17:45):
And we're getting ready to pushor they're telling me, okay,
it's going to be time to pushand that epidural is wearing off
again on that side and it'spretty pinchy and burning and
all that.
And so during the whole likepushing phase, I just remember
it really felt like the epiduralhad worn off and was like full
(18:09):
feeling of things.
But at the same time I knew itwasn't, because now I've had a
baby, naturally, and it wasdefinitely not fully worn off,
but it took an hour and 20minutes to push my daughter out
and we did traditional, likeeverything was traditional,
because I knew nothing ofanything else.
So I was on my back the wholetime.
(18:31):
The baby she wasn't turning asfast as they wanted, so they did
use the vacuum, which I had noidea what that was or what the
complications could be, whichthank goodness I didn't know, I
guess, because that would havebeen terrifying, knowing that
that's what they were going touse.
But they use the vacuum and itwas really.
Honestly, putting the vacuum inor whatever they do down there
(18:52):
was excruciating, that was superpainful, but she came out in
like minutes and she was ahealthy, beautiful baby girl.
That was the beginning, or thefirst baby.
Stephanie Theriault (19:04):
I want to tell you something special.
I feel like this episode andyou and I were meant to meet.
I believe in numbers andbirthdays.
My oldest son, his birthday isSeptember 6th.
Kelley Weinzetl (19:15):
Oh my gosh, how fun, that is so cool.
How old is he?
Stephanie Theriault (19:19):
He is eight years old, that's so cute, so
how fun.
Kelley Weinzetl (19:23):
Yes, yes, gotta love those September babies.
Stephanie Theriault (19:32):
We paused this episode for a quick message
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plus inclusivity, languageoptions, access to vaginal
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How was your postpartum carelike?
The recovery?
Kelley Weinzetl (20:32):
So painful, that is for sure.
And oh, you'll love this.
So they had I believe it'scalled a boudet.
The hospital I stayed at waslike it had a beautiful big room
.
You birthed, labored and stayedin that same room and I had
also tested positive for I thinkit's the strep B.
So I ended up having to staythree days in the hospital, but
(20:53):
everything was fine.
But the thing about the Boudetthey were like, okay, well,
don't forget to turn it offbecause it'll flood your room.
I was like, okay, well, don'tforget to turn it off because
it'll flood your room.
I was like, okay, oh, you ofcourse know that first night
after I had my baby, I forgot toturn that bidet off.
I wake up, the whole room isflooded.
I was so embarrassed and I myboyfriend was sleeping on the
(21:15):
couch and so I seriously tookout every single linen towel,
was on my hands and knees,cleaning it up as fast as I
possibly could before a nursemight come in.
And I was like, because I was soembarrassed, I cleaned up the
whole room and my linen basketwas stuffed with every towel,
(21:36):
but there was not a drop ofwater.
Let me tell you on that, I'msure when the nurse came in she
was like, ah, she must've notturned that boot day off.
So when we got home, well,before we got home, you know I
was in the hospital and you know, going, uh, voiding was not too
bad, but when I was going tohave a bowel movement oh, good
(22:02):
Lord, the most painfulexperience ever wanted to cry my
eyes out, just like do I haveto ever do that again?
Like it was terrible.
So I did not expect that at all, so that was shocking.
Which now, knowing what I know,I'm like okay, like okay.
Well, I fully understand whythat was so painful did you have
(22:24):
any tearing?
no, thank goodness, no.
So and honestly, I think thatis mostly because my nurse I
knew my nurse.
She was my childhood friend'smom, which was cool and, um, she
spent time down there preparingthat tissue for being stretched
(22:45):
and I didn't know that's whatshe was doing until now, of
course, reflection, and I like,okay, that's what she was doing
and my mom was with me and soshe also had shared that.
She was also, you know, downthere like massaging and
stretching and doing things, andso I did not tear, which was
thank goodness.
I did not tear or have to havean episiotomy, so that was great
(23:08):
.
But the biggest thing was havinga bowel movement would like
send me into tears and it wasjust like give me so much
anxiety because it just hurts sobad.
For so long I did have to usesuppositories because it just
was.
It was that bad, it wasterrible, that part was the
(23:29):
hardest, but I did not bleedvery long, which was amazing,
and my body like came backquickly.
I only gained 18 pounds as a19-year-old, 20-year-old,
pregnant woman and I think Ilost the most I've ever lost in
my life Went from being like 150pounds down to 120.
(23:52):
It was pretty wild.
Just nursing.
I nursed for nine months sothere was like not an ounce of
fat on my body, sure fat baby,which was wonderful, I'm not
complaining but definitely adifferent experience compared to
being a 35, 36 year old womanhaving a baby.
For sure it was definitely aninteresting experience and I
(24:14):
would say the recovery as the 19year old, 20 year old, was way
more painful than it was as a 35, 36 year old woman.
Stephanie Theriault (24:24):
I'm excited to hear about the next birth
story.
Kelley Weinzetl (24:27):
Yes, okay.
So now let's fast forward rightAll those years.
And, to be honest, when I metmy husband, my daughter was 14
years old and, like I said, Ihad dated a guy or two, but I
had never had a boyfriend and Ihad purposed to stay single for
(24:47):
a long time because I wanted tofocus on my daughter.
I didn't want to focus on a guy.
I didn't want him.
In the way I grew up in a splitfamily.
My dad, he was like a habitualdater, so there was always a new
woman, not my mom.
My mom was kind of like me, oneand done, but I just didn't
want her to be in thisenvironment of constantly a new
(25:09):
guy in my life.
So I purposed to stay singlefor a very long time and then,
finally, I felt like I was ready, met my husband he did not want
kids and so I was like myhusband, he did not want kids.
And so I was like, yes, lord,this is him.
He was buff and just veryattractive, had this arm sleeve
tattoo.
He was into the Lord.
I mean, I met him at a prayermeeting.
(25:30):
So I was like, amen, he is herefor me.
I'm so excited.
And then, when I found out thathe was younger than me by five
years, which I had forever I waslike I will not date someone
younger, I won't do it.
And then, finally, I was likeall right, lord, I will not date
anyone younger than five years.
That's the cap.
He seriously is five yearsyounger than me.
(25:51):
It was like that, don't youthink you're so funny?
Stephanie Theriault (25:54):
Yeah, he was listening.
Kelley Weinzetl (25:56):
Yes, yes.
And so he was five yearsyounger, no kids, and didn't
want kids.
So it was like, all right, herewe go, this is awesome.
Well, he got around my daughterand he was like, ah, so you
(26:16):
know, I think I want to havekids.
Now I was like, well, I guessthat's a good thing, but, oh, my
goodness.
So he decided he wants to havekids.
I was like, all right, you know, I can't not allow you to be a
father of, you know, your ownflesh and blood.
So I was like, all right, we'llhave kids.
And so, like I said, we decided, okay, we're going to get
married, we're going to have ayear of just being married and
(26:38):
then we'll get pregnant.
Well, of course, four months in, we get pregnant.
And that was my fault, I likebroke the rules, but that's okay
.
And it was like, of course,like the one time, you couldn't
have done it more perfect.
And he's like, well, could yoube getting pregnant, like right
now?
I was like, well, yeah, if wewere trying to get pregnant,
this would be the day we wouldwant to probably do that.
(27:00):
And, of course, that justworked out.
So we had our baby, okay.
So the pregnancy was a lotdifferent, a lot different.
So I had zero nausea with mydaughter the first trimester.
I was very nauseous and I wasso sensitive to the sun Me and
my husband.
We had taken a trip to Arizonaand I love the heat, I love the
(27:24):
pool, I love that oh, my gosh, Iwas melting the whole time.
I was like I cannot, I can't,it's so hot.
I was such a baby I couldn't beout in the sun more than like
15 minutes.
It was ridiculous.
So that was crazy and I wasvery nauseous.
But thank goodness I did notthrow up my poor cousin.
She throws up nonstop her wholefirst trimester.
(27:46):
It's like, oh, I do not knowhow she does it.
She's had four kids, it's crazy.
So I was barely experiencingnausea.
I don't know how she does this.
So I had some nausea, but thatwas pretty much it.
And then second trimester, thatwas pretty easy no nausea
anymore.
So that was great.
And then third trimester, I likewould have those like lightning
(28:12):
feelings.
I didn't know what those wereand, holy cow, I just be like
stopping my tracks, like whatthe world was that and just,
literally, just, without lack ofbetter words, just felt like a
lightning strike in my crotch,like I remember going to TJ Maxx
(28:33):
with my husband.
We're looking for furniture orsomething and I seriously had to
sit in like their furnituresection on the couch and my
husband, like was going aroundthe store bringing me things
because I was like I can't.
I like either he's kicking mein the crotch for somehow or
something's happening because Icannot walk, and it was so
(28:53):
painful.
So those would happen sorandomly throughout the whole
third trimester, which was nuts.
And we did a road trip in mythird trimester too.
So he's from South Dakota andthat's about a 20 hour drive
from where we live and, not tomention, we did it in the winter
, which I would never do again.
(29:14):
But so we do this long roadtrip.
My ankles were fatter than fat,like I had elephant ankles.
It was ridiculous.
It was a fun time, but I willnever do that again.
So third trimester, I justdefinitely like those lightning
bolts to the crotch were a gamechanger for sure.
(29:36):
Going back to the firsttrimester, I seriously put on 10
pounds like instantly.
I was just like how, how, andit was like I really didn't have
cravings with my daughter.
I was all about Asian food,literally.
My husband was out of town andI ordered like five or six
different dishes, but I didn'twant to like anyone to know, so
(30:00):
I ordered them for takeout, forpickup, so I could take them
home and have them all spreadout and just eat from each of
them.
And I think I ate all six ofthose dishes for like four days.
But I loved Asian food.
But back to the third trimesteryeah, it was definite.
Swelling in the legs was crazy,crazy.
(30:23):
Like one day I came home fromwork and my right ankle was just
a balloon and I'm like, oh mygosh, I can't, this has got to
be wrong, because the otherankle was fine.
And so I like I took a pictureand sent it to my midwives and
they were like, oh, it's fine,it's you know, your baby's
probably just sitting in thisway or that way and and it's
totally normal thing.
(30:43):
But if something else happens,let us know.
And that's another thing that Idid.
Totally different was I wantedto have a natural birth and I
wanted to do it withoutmedication.
I am a very goal oriented girland I was just like okay, my
body was built for this, it'sdesigned for this.
I do not have to medicate it todo this.
I want to fully experience whatthe experience of birth is and,
(31:07):
plus, I am a Christian and myrelationship with the Lord is
very special, and I just waslike gosh.
The Lord designed me to givebirth, so I want to experience
what my body's design issupposed to do.
So I had like books andpodcasts that I listened to.
(31:37):
I did all the investigating andresearching this time and I
chose to go to midwife because Iwanted it to be along that
natural line, and so I felt likea midwife experience would give
me that more than going to anOB, and I also wanted to still
go in the hospital, even thoughI wanted that natural experience
(32:00):
.
It'd been a hot second, since Ihad my first baby, so I wanted
that expertise to be there justin case I needed help or
something went wrong.
I wanted to have the help justright there, not to have to hop
in a car and drive and thenhopefully something doesn't bad
(32:21):
happen in that process.
So that's why I chose midwifeand that's why I chose to do it
in the hospital and not a homebirth or something like that.
My midwives were amazing, andthe most wonderful thing that I
loved is they did not insist onvaginal checks at all the whole
time.
I loved that.
(32:41):
I was just like, oh my gosh,this is great, I love it.
So I fully enjoyed it nothaving to do that at all
whatsoever one time.
So that was amazing.
And my first appointment goingin the midwife was like so now
that you're 35,?
But the midwife was like so nowthat you're 35, you're a
geriatric Like what?
(33:03):
So I went from pretty much anadolescent pregnancy to a
geriatric pregnancy, which waslike that's rude.
Who dubbed it geriatric?
That is totally rude.
But I was like, fine, whatever.
So that was kind of comical.
I was a geriatric pregnancy.
Yeah, it's like someone needsto rename that in the medical
field.
(33:23):
Iw, go make someone change that.
Stephanie Theriault (33:27):
Seriously.
Kelley Weinzetl (33:28):
It should not be geriatric, but yeah.
So the third trimester, theswelling was crazy, but it was.
It was, it was fine, but it wasjust like kind of more
uncomfortable at the end justbecause it felt like my legs
were so full, if that makessense.
So my baby was due Valentine'sDay, which was so fun, but he
(33:50):
did not come on Valentine's Day,let me tell you.
He decided to come two weekslater when we had to evict him
and I had to be induced.
Some people might say, well, youdidn't have a natural birth
because you had to be induced,and I'm still qualifying it as a
natural birth because I hadzero medication for pain relief.
(34:11):
I'll say that because I guessPitocin, you'd probably say, is
a medication of sorts.
So yes, say is a medication ofsorts.
So, yes, valentine's Day comesand goes, no baby.
I wait the whole two weeks, nobaby.
And during that time I did haveultrasounds and they would
check the baby to make sureeverything was fine, which was
good.
(34:31):
They did say that my, what isit?
The placenta, I believe, wasstarting to calcify.
So they were just keeping aneye on that and through those
two weeks and then ultimately wecame to that last day of just
she did a membrane sweep andthat I thought was going to be
very painful and uncomfortableand it actually really didn't
(34:52):
hurt at all.
So that was a wonderfulsurprise.
But it was way bloodier than Iexpected.
But that happened.
I had some light cramping andthat was it, no action.
So he was not coming out.
It was freezing here, so hemust've just been cold, right,
wanted to stay warm and cozy inthere.
So then the next morning at 7am we had to go in and be.
(35:15):
I was induced for that.
But the inducing processthankfully it was all pretty
smooth and easy.
I didn't know too much aboutinduction or being induced.
That wasn't something I hadreally researched because I
didn't expect that.
I expected with my firstdaughter I was two days late, so
(35:36):
I figured I'd probably be twodays late, which wasn't the case
.
Come to find out I know I toldyou before, but come to find out
my husband had been two weekslate, his older sister had been
two weeks late and then hisyounger sisters.
One was a week late and thenthe last one she was induced.
But my midwives had said it canbe familial.
So I was like, oh my gosh, thisis your fault that I'm two
(35:58):
weeks late because of you, butit was fine.
So we go in and we chose theballoon because my midwife
explained, you know we could dothis.
I think it's like a chemical orsomething or a hormone of sorts
that they put in and she saidonce you do that you can't take
that back because it's absorbedinto the body.
(36:19):
And if your body doesn't likethat, there's really not too
much you can do, there's nogoing back.
And then you have to wait somany hours before you can do
another technique to induce.
So I was just like, well, let'sdefinitely not do that.
So we did the balloon.
That did not hurt at all, Iwill say mortifying the position
(36:41):
you have to be in to do thatand I definitely cried because
it was just like.
I think I was just so caught upin like I wanted everything to
be natural.
I wanted my water to breaknatural, I wanted to go into
labor natural, I wanted to havemy baby fully natural and I
couldn't with being induced andso I didn't want any IVs and
(37:03):
being induced.
You have to have now an IV.
You have to have monitors.
I didn't want monitors, Iwanted to be the pain in the
booty, patient for the nurse,where it's like I don't want
anything and all of a sudden I'mhaving all the things.
And so I was.
I think it was mostly just likethe position you have to be in
to get the balloon.
But then also, you know, myhopes of having this full
(37:26):
experience being natural wasgoing away.
But you know that, thankfully,my midwife was amazing.
If you're in Boise, her name isMegan Kitterman.
She works at Idaho Stork.
She's awesome, go to her.
But she did great.
My balloon, getting that put indid not hurt at all and they
still allowed me to wear my owngown and my own socks, so I
(37:48):
didn't have to wear the hospitalgown or anything like that.
But it did feel like not thebest having this thing taped to
my leg and like being pulled,and it just felt so you know,
for lack of better terms againgross, like this thing just
coming out of me and pulling onme.
But to speed it up a little bit, that was in for probably three
(38:10):
to four hours and then my waterbroke and you know, during that
beginning phase everything waslike pretty calm.
My contractions I didn't reallyfeel them at all and everything
was going smooth.
I was on the ball most of thattime too, like a yoga type ball,
bouncing around and walkingaround and all of that.
But then once my water broke,they upped the Pitocin and, man,
(38:34):
the contractions.
It was go time again.
That definitely didn't changethe contractions.
It was go time again.
That definitely didn't change.
That was for sure the same withthis pregnancy or this delivery
as well.
My husband he absolutely wantsnothing to do with anything
woman stuff like periods andthings like that and he was such
a help.
He was like all hands on deckthe whole time.
(38:55):
So that was amazing.
I'd be on the ball, he'd bebehind me and he put counter
pressure on my pelvis and I hada heating pad that I was using
on the front or the back, sothat helped.
And then once that stoppedworking, we were going to
transition to the bathtub.
So thankfully, my hospital didhave a bathtub, so the nurse got
(39:17):
that already.
Thankfully, my hospital didhave a bathtub, so the nurse got
that already.
I got in the bath and I'm likebutt naked in the bath and I
remember like at one point Iopened my eyes, because once
those contractions started, Idon't think I really opened my
eyes, except for like here orthere.
My eyes were closed shut thewhole time and I had read Ina
(39:40):
May's book about childbirth andso I knew, like a lot of
techniques of like giving thatlike deep, like you know noise
and doing raspberries and justhow that's connected to the
cervix and to soften and allowit to dilate faster.
So my mindset the whole timewas just making those deep
(40:01):
voices, doing the raspberries tosoften and to open the cervix
and to just welcome contractionsas a partner to birth and that
they're not my enemy and all ofthose things.
But then also, you know, Iwanted to get in the bath so
that all that tissue was niceand soft and to help pain
(40:21):
management to another painmanagement technique.
So we get in the bath, I'm inthere and man, I'm not a tall
woman but I have some long legsand that was kind of a pain.
I had to have my legs all likebent, funny to be in the tub.
I'm like sweating and my eyesare like closed shut just
because I'm like concentratingand I like open them for a
(40:43):
second and there's like fivepeople in this tiny bathroom,
including my 17 year olddaughter that's seeing her mom
butt naked.
I'm like trying to get throughthis and it's like pretty
painful at this moment and I'mjust like, whose big idea was
this to have this natural birth?
And I'm like, okay, it was mine.
(41:03):
And so I'm like they had toldme that, you know, I could say a
word or whatever, let them know, and they could give me this
like drug.
That would be like having aglass of wine, where it would
just take a little bit of theedge off.
And so I was kind of likereally thinking that.
And then I was like no, you arehere to have a natural birth.
You can do this.
You were made for this, youwere built for this.
(41:25):
You're not giving up now andyou will regret it if you do.
So I was like all right, we'renot doing that.
And I'm in the bathtub forever.
Get out of the bathtub becauseI'm like sweating hot.
And now I'm like, fine, I'llput on your gown, because my
gown, like I didn't want to putthat back on because it was
actually not the best, like withthe IV, it was kind of a pain.
(41:47):
So we put on the hospital gown,which I really did not care
about Actually.
Yeah, yeah, we did.
And then, because at one point Ididn't have a gown on at all, I
can't remember, but eventuallyI'm like butt naked the whole
time walking around and I neverimagined that that would have
been me, but it was like Ididn't want anything on.
(42:08):
Then we like get over to thetable or the not the table but
the bed and we do the peanutball.
My husband's pretty much justmoving my body at this point and
putting me where I need to go.
So it was amazing to have himto just like get me in the right
positions.
But I'm on my side, have thepeanut ball, flip to the other
side, peanut ball in between mylegs and like one legs up in a
(42:32):
stirrup.
So it's like I can only imaginewhat this looks like.
But I'm covered with a blanket,thank goodness, and all the
while I really wanted to haveworship music and I romanticized
this birth experience.
So I had like this playlist andall the things, worship music
blasting.
And while I'm on the peanut ballon the other side, all of a
(42:54):
sudden I'm like listening to themusic and it's in Spanish, so
like the playlist must haveended and it just started
playing whatever music underChristian was coming up, because
I knew the like I could hearthe music.
So I knew the song, but it wasin Spanish.
I'm like this is hilarious.
This like is in the background,but that was just like a funny
(43:18):
moment where it's just like arewe listening to Spanish music
right now?
That is hilarious.
Hilarious because none of usknow Spanish.
So the contractions are prettyintense still, and now, finally,
I'm going through a contractionand my body pushes.
That was wild, because when Ihad the epidural I could not
feel that at all.
(43:39):
So my body all of a suddentransitions from this like
painful experience to a push,and I was just I knew that I was
supposed to tell them, so I waslike my body just pushed.
So they're like okay.
So they switched me to thebirthing chair.
So I scooted down.
My husband sat behind me andI'm in this birthing chair
(43:59):
squatting.
They've got like a mirrorunderneath me the whole bit, a
flashlight, because we have thelights down low and they're down
there looking to see likewhat's going on.
And so we pushed forever inthat birthing chair and the
funny thing was or maybe notfunny, but the cool thing was
that it didn't hurt anymore whenit changed from contractions to
(44:21):
open the cervix to contractionsto push the baby.
Now it didn't hurt, it was justexhausting because every muscle
, every fiber of my body wasshaking every push and I'd have
like a short one and then areally long one.
So and then I transitioned frommaking those noises to just
pushing everything, all myeffort into that push.
(44:42):
So, birthing chair we were therefor quite a while and we
weren't getting anywhere fast.
So they wanted to check me.
So I got up on the bed againand the midwife saw that the
like lip of the cervix was onhis edge of his head or
something like that.
So we did a couple pushes toget that manipulated down, which
(45:03):
didn't hurt, but it just likewas pretty difficult, but that
was the only time.
I was on my back the whole time.
And then after that they wantedme to try to go to the bathroom
.
So I waddle over to the toilet,I'm on the bath or on the
toilet and a contraction comesand I think, because I was
(45:24):
higher up and I could hold ontothe handrail man, I pushed and
he like dropped with, like rightinto.
They say, when the baby's aboutto come out, you're going to
feel like he's in your butt.
And OMG, like I was, like he'sin my butt, he's like right
there.
It was like a melon between mylegs.
It was.
It was crazy.
And my, my midwife is rightnext to me and I was like I'm
(45:45):
going to have him right here onthe toilet.
She's like no, you're not,you're going to, you're going to
make it back to the bed.
I was like I don't know if Ican get up, get over to the
table and this time she wants meon all fours.
So I'm on my hands and knees onthe bed.
My husband, in throughout thiswhole process of pregnancy, has
(46:08):
decided that he's going to catchour baby, deliver our baby,
which was beautiful.
So he's getting ready todeliver the baby and I'm on all
fours and the baby like goesback up.
So now I'm mad because the babyis like not there anymore, my
gosh, darn it.
So I'm on all fours, I do acouple pushes, I can feel he's
there.
And I was just like, once Ifelt him there, I was like he is
(46:30):
not going anywhere.
So I was just like determined,I'm not waiting for another
contraction, this baby is comingout.
And so I'm pushing with like allmy might.
I can feel him crowning and Ican hear my midwife saying, like
you know, I think it's like midor mild and then medium and
then full crown, and she's likeslow down, slow down, slow down.
(46:50):
So I like slow down, which Ididn't think I could do that,
but I was able to slow down andthen pushed him out his head and
then got his shoulders out.
And then, after he came out,they're like okay, flip over.
So I'm like okay, so I flipover onto my back and they put
him on my belly and that waslike intense, just like all of
(47:14):
that movement.
And then he's on my stomach andI really wanted him to like get
the full what do you call it?
Like the full blood from theplacenta and so they waited for
the cord to go white and theysaid when the cord's white, then
it's done.
So that only took a few minutes.
(47:34):
Then my husband cut the cord andthen we really wanted the baby
to do, my baby to do the breastcrawl, which was magical.
But the poor little guy, he waslike cold, I guess, and so he
would breast crawl over and thenthey would be like, oh he's
cold and move him back to themiddle of my chest.
So the poor guy had to breastcrawl three times, but but he
(47:57):
did it.
So if you're wondering ifbabies do it, oh yes, they do,
and he had to do it three darntimes.
So we got to do the breastcrawl, which was beautiful and
yeah, so it was just a beautifulexperience.
And he was born at 6 pm on thedot.
So that was the experience.
It was beautiful.
I would absolutely have anotherbaby natural, all hands down,
(48:22):
like for sure, and I think everywoman should at least
experience it one time, even ifthey don't do it again natural.
But I think it's just abeautiful thing what our bodies
do in birth.
Stephanie Theriault (48:33):
It was amazing just listening to your
story gives me goosebumps,because it is such an empowering
story to hear.
And when you talk about at thebeginning like fear, right,
(48:55):
there's so many of us go into itfearful and it's just an
experience we go through andthen we come out on the other
side empowered and you hear ittime and time again like I would
do that again.
I would do that again, and it'sso.
Once you go through it, you caneven describe it right, right,
(49:16):
I love it.
Kelley Weinzetl (49:17):
A magical experience, like, truly like it
just just what our bodies can do, really, even just the process
of dilating and how big it hasto get down there and then how
small it gets again, and justhow your body's going to do it,
regardless if you're going topartner with it or not.
So you might as well justchoose to partner with it and
(49:38):
help it do its job, and it'sjust such a gift for your baby
too, like I don't know.
It is just amazing.
I think just the wholepregnancy, birthing,
breastfeeding, all of it is justso mind-blowing.
What our bodies are built to do.
It's just amazing.
Stephanie Theriault (50:01):
I love the fact that your midwife was open
to letting your husband glove upand help catch his child.
I love that she was open tothat.
Kelley Weinzetl (50:09):
He did and she was just totally about it and he
was getting gloved up.
And then I don't know why, buthe was like, well, do I have to
wear gloves?
And they said no, and so theman that can't even talk about
periods decides he's not goingto wear gloves and to deliver
this baby.
And he did, and he deliveredhim just fine.
(50:30):
And listening to him tell thestory is hilarious.
He's like I was like pickingthings off and it was just
disgusting but beautiful at thesame time.
So it's just yeah, and we loveto be able to tell so many
people that he delivered thebaby and they're like, oh, we
didn't even know, that was anoption.
And it's our pregnancy, it'sour baby, it's our delivery.
(50:51):
We've hired them to just helpand assist and that's really
where the empowerment should beand assist and that's really
where the empowerment should be.
Unfortunately, it's not thatway for some cases, but it's
just like and that's something Ivery much learned this is my
birth, this is my baby, this ismy body and, without being
(51:12):
snotty or mean or rude, I wantto do it my way, but of course,
I've hired you to be here toadvise me and guide me, and if
that's not the best routeanymore, then, yes, intervene
and say, okay, this is actually,let's do this for you and your
baby's safety, or whatever.
(51:32):
It's an empowering journey,that is for sure.
And postpartum was amazingbecause, in my opinion, I wasn't
laying on my back for hours onend and during the birthing and
delivery my baby wasn't on myorgans, you know the colon, the
rectum.
(51:52):
Her pressure wasn't laying onthat for an hour and a half
going through the birthing canal.
Instead, I was on everyposition you possibly can
imagine, except for on my back,maybe like five minutes on my
back, and so I did not havetrouble at all going voiding, I
didn't have any trouble doing abowel movement, no pain at all
(52:15):
whatsoever, but I bled for likea month.
I was like, oh my gosh, am Iever going to stop bleeding With
my daughter?
I think I bled for like a weekNow, at 30, you know I was 36 by
the time I birthed him and Ilike bled for literally like a
(52:38):
month.
That was so obnoxious and Iwould say, the first time no one
gave me an ice pack or likeeven offered an ice pack, nor
did they suggest like oh, usethis squirt bottle.
I had the bidet, but, no, nosquirt bottle.
Well, because I had done allthe like research, man, I had my
whole kit, all this stuff, butthe hospital here in Boise, st
(53:01):
Luke's, downtown, they had amillion ice packs for you, so
that was awesome.
And then they had a squirtbottle, they had this, they had
that, all these things that youcould use.
They sent you home with specialunderwear that you could wear,
which I was like, oh, I'm neverwearing those and I wore them
like every day.
Can I have some more, please?
Dignity, it goes out the window.
(53:22):
It's just like what is the mostconvenient thing and that those
are so convenient.
But, and I would say, the onething that was way more
difficult this time around wasbreastfeeding With my daughter.
Breastfeeding was so easy, sheknew exactly what she was doing
and my milk came in likegangbusters, like it was
(53:44):
overflowing milk, and this timeit took like a week for my milk
to come in, and so it was like Imean it was my milk has been
fine, but it just was such amental game like feeling like is
my milk in, is it not in?
Is he been fine?
But it just was such a mentalgame Like feeling like is my
(54:05):
milk in?
Is it not in?
Is he getting enough?
Is he just cluster feeding?
And I forgot that, how babiescluster feed, and I think maybe
my daughter didn't do it as muchbecause I had so much milk
Whereas there was just like justenough for the beginning.
He didn't really lose weight sowe never had an issue.
But I just remember it just wasway more difficult and mentally
(54:27):
draining to breastfeed thistime in the beginning because my
milk didn't come in ever fullgangbusters where it's just like
there's so much extra.
It was just enough the wholetime, which kind of is a
blessing now that I look at it,because then I didn't have to
pump and do all of this.
(54:48):
It just was enough.
Stephanie Theriault (54:51):
It was what your baby needed.
Kelley Weinzetl (54:52):
Exactly so, yeah, so the second round was
beautiful and I liked postpartummuch better.
The second round, let me tellyou.
Stephanie Theriault (55:02):
Well, kelly , it's been such a pleasure
chatting with you.
I hear your passion and I lovethat you trusted your body and I
love that you are opening upand sharing to women who are
listening to the podcast, toyoung women who have found
themselves pregnant at 19, 20and listening to your story, so
they'd feel like they're notalone and can hear your words
(55:23):
and your advice, and I lovedhearing about your second birth
going all natural and invitingyour husband to be a part of it.
It's just been an absolutepleasure.
Kelley Weinzetl (55:33):
Thank you.
Yes, it has been so fun torelive it and to tell it and to
share, and I just hope itencourages anyone that's young
and in that position that youcan do it.
You were built for this andthere are resources out there to
help you and you can absolutelydo it.
And if you're older and findingyourself pregnant, you can
(55:54):
absolutely do it too, like it isa birth, pregnancy, labor.
All of it is a beautiful thing,and I just hope that they're
all inspired and hopeful andfilled with excitement about
their journey.
Stephanie Theriault (56:09):
And Kelly.
If there's baby number threecoming along the way, make sure
you reach out to me.
Kelley Weinzetl (56:14):
I will.
I will for sure.
Stephanie Theriault (56:17):
All right, thank you.
Kelley Weinzetl (56:18):
Thank you.
Stephanie Theriault (56:29):
Thank you for listening.
Be sure to check out our socialmedia.
All links are provided in theepisode description.
We're excited to have you here.
Please give us a follow If youor someone you know would like
to be a guest on the show.
Reach out to us via email atinfo at maternalwealthcom.
And remember stay healthy,embrace your power and you got
(56:53):
this, thank you.
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