Yocairys Diaz: From Rikers to Raise Your Spark

This week on Mavericks on the Mic, we are speaking with Yocairys Diaz. At just 17, she faced a life-altering challenge: a potential 25-to-life sentence. But through her faith, she found a path of transformation, emerging stronger and more inspired than ever.

In this episode, Yocairys joins the founders and executives of Maverick City Music and Tribl Records to talk about how she navigated the darkest moments of her life, leading her to empower others through her ministry, Raise Your Spark.

🎙️ Overcoming spiritual warfare and gang influence
🎙️ Her faith-driven transformation during her time at Riker's
🎙️ Building resilience through Bible study
🎙️ Founding Raise Your Spark: Empowering Women 
🎙️ Navigating family dynamics in a Latino household
🎙️ Embracing purpose, empathy, and forgiveness

This episode is all about resilience, family, forgiveness and divine purpose.

🔥 Drop a comment to let us know who you want to see on the Mic.
👉 Don’t forget to rate, share and subscribe
🎧 Want to watch the conversation? Watch on YouTube

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
The power of God and his ability to really transform
lives and transform communitiesis what we're interested in, but
you have a very interestingjourney.

Speaker 2 (00:09):
you have a very interesting sort of path.

Speaker 3 (00:12):
Number one, to God be the glory, because I would not
be here if it had not been forhim and I honestly didn't know
that he actually had his handover my life until you know, I
was 17 years old and I wasfacing 25 to life in prison you
know I was 17 years old and Iwas facing 25 to life in prison.

Speaker 1 (00:27):
Like I think, in the report it says you called the
police before you did it, butwhen you just told us you didn't
say that my brother wasliterally my best friend and
when he walks in the house Ihave the knife in my hand.

Speaker 3 (00:38):
He stands in front of me like super close to me, and
he's like go ahead, do it.

Speaker 2 (01:08):
What's up everybody?
Welcome to another episode ofMavericks on the Mic.

Speaker 1 (01:11):
My name is JJ my name is Norman and we have a really,
really special guest with ustoday.
She's a motivational speaker,spiritual leader and co-founder
of Raise your Spark.

Speaker 2 (01:28):
Her name is Yo Kyrus Diaz.
Hey, hey, y'all, what's up?
Thank you for having me.

Speaker 1 (01:31):
I'm so excited and I'm grateful to be here we're
excited, so we have brought youon mavericks on the mic.
I'm sure you're probablyfamiliar with maverick city
music, but this is jj and I.
We're the producers behind themusic.
You know we kind of run thebrain trust of the business, and
so we wanted to take anopportunity to highlight some

(01:53):
unique voices in faith.
A lot of times on Christianpodcasts you see pastors, you
see like really big worshipleaders, or you'll see like you
know safe what I consider safetalent but the power of God and
his ability to really transformlives and transform communities

(02:16):
is what we're interested in,like those unique stories, those
stories that really show youthe transformational power of
God and his ability to rescuesomeone despite anything.
And so we found you, we foundyour story.
I think you were following Mavand I was like man.

(02:36):
I was talking to our group chat, I was like she'd be a great
person to interview, justbecause your resiliency, the joy
that you carry and the peaceseems to surpass all
understanding.

Speaker 2 (02:50):
Absolutely, and you know we all have a journey.
We all have ways that we gethere.
We all have ways that we'vegotten where we are.
But you have a very interestingjourney.
You have a very interestingsort of path on your journey.
I'd love to maybe just startthere and maybe just, yeah, have
you just share where you'vebeen and how you got to where
you are now.

Speaker 3 (03:09):
I would say number one to God be the glory, because
I would not be here if it hadnot been for him having his hand
over my life, and I honestlydidn't know that he actually had
his hand over my life until,you know, I was 17 years old and
I was facing 25 to life inprison life until you know, I
was 17 years old and I wasfacing 25 to life in prison.
And it was at that point whereI realized, like I always knew,

(03:30):
there was a God my mama used tosend me to Sunday school with,
like the Catholic church, um,but I never had an intimate
relationship with him.
So I knew religion but I didn'tknow him.
And so at that point, um, at 17, I'm in this.
You know, they're like 25 tolife, and I'm like in Rikers
Island at this time, as I servedmy time in New York City.
And you know, I'm in RikersIsland and they're like 25 to

(03:51):
life, no bail.
So they take me to RikersIsland, which is like the jail
that they take you to whenyou're fighting your case, and I
remember going into my cell andliterally dropping to my knees.
I don't know why.
That was my first response,because I didn't know how to
really pray.
I didn't know what that was, um, but that's when I realized
that he was always with me andso sometimes, you know, at the

(04:11):
time it didn't make sense, butmy prayer in that moment was I
don't know why this is happening, this makes absolutely no sense
, and what happened and what ledto me facing time and all that
kind of stuff, which we'll diveinto it it was something that
really shocked me as well,because I'm like this can't be
real, like this is not who I am,this is not like I wasn't out

(04:34):
there rebellion and like being arebel in the streets and gang.
I wasn't that kind of person.
So I'm like, why, like how didthis all happen?
Like in a blink of a light, mylife, my life changed literally,
and my family's lives,everyone's life, changed, um,
but fast forward, after doing mytime in prison.
Well, while doing my time, um,I literally learned to build an
intimate relationship with God,and I was, um.

(05:00):
I was so hungry for him becauseI don't want to get emotional
already, cause we're justgetting started, but I love
Christ so much because when Icouldn't love myself, he loved
me and I think for me, that'swhat made me want to get to know
who is he.
Because in real life, you knowwe're human.
So if you hurt me, if youoffend me, you know I'm going to
walk away like I'm cutting youoff, right, that's what we do as
people.
But to see that there is a Godthat loves us in spite of you

(05:25):
know, that has forgiveness inhis heart, that that that can
redeem you and set you free fromyour past and those things, I
was like I need to get to knowwho that is.
And so I was just so hungry andon fire for him that I was like
at every Bible study possible,I was praise dancing, I was even
on the choir and I can't evensing now, but I was on here too
and it was all to his glory.
And so fast forward.

(05:45):
Here I am today.
Um, you know, by the grace ofGod, I I was never afraid to
share my story because Iunderstood that my testimony
wasn't for me.
You know, a lot of people saythings like I want to be like
Christ.
Right, but we are lovers ofourselves, and not just by the
things that we do, but byholding our testimony to
ourselves, because the Bibletells us that we conquer and

(06:07):
defeat the enemy by the, notjust the power of the blood of
the lamb, but by the powers andthe words of our testimony.
And so a lot of people areafraid of sharing their story
because it's like, oh, I don'twant to bring shame and guilt to
my life and I want to protectmy identity and my image to the
world, but I'm like man that'sselfish, because when he died on
Calvary he did that publicly,you know.
And so for me, I'm like youknow what, I'm going to share my

(06:29):
truth and everyone's not goingto like it.
People are going to have somethings to say and I've seen that
.
You know I've shared mytestimony and you've had, you
know, I've had like people saymean things but like put
specific keywords that you don'twant to ever see, and I never
see the mean stuff because I'mlike I'm not doing this for
y'all, and since then I've beenhome.
Now what, like seven years, anda lot of lives have been

(06:54):
impacted, not because of me, butbecause I wasn't afraid to open
up my mouth.

Speaker 2 (06:58):
So you're 17 and you're in Rikers Island, which,
for context, I mean we did someministry in Rikers a few years
ago.

Speaker 1 (07:07):
It's not a.
It's one of the worst prisonsin the world.
Yeah, it's not very nice, it'snot the worst.

Speaker 2 (07:11):
Yeah, so maybe like, can we maybe talk about how you
got there, how you ended up inRikers and why you were there in
the first place?

Speaker 1 (07:17):
Let's go a little bit further back.
Let's go a little bit.
So what was growing up like?
Two-parent household,one-parent household, how many
siblings?
What did your parents do?
What neighborhood are you from?
That kind of thing?

Speaker 3 (07:33):
All right.
So I would say I had a prettygood childhood.
My parents were struggling, butI never knew that because I
always had food on the table, Ialways had clothes on my back.
I mean, we always had a bike inthe summer and rollerblades,
and so my brothers and I.
So at the time it was just mybrothers and I.
My brother Frankie, he was likehe was the oldest one, then my
brother Kelvin, and then it wasmyself.

(07:53):
I was the only girl growing upand it was just these two boys,
and so Frankie and I, we were alittle bit more adventurous.
So he and I were like best buds, like best of friends.
He was the oldest one, nowKelvin, love you Kelvin.
He was like a mama's boy, likehe was the one that wanted to
watch cartoons all day andsnitch on us if we did something
bad.
You know, he was that kind ofbrother, that kind of sibling.

(08:15):
And so, growing up, my parentsthey weren't together, but I
never knew that because myparents always kept a good
friendship.
So even though my parentsweren't together, my mama would
be in the house with herboyfriend and my mama would.
You know, the first thing Ialways heard her say was if the
daddy want to come, he gonnacome.
You know, he can come wheneverhe want, he has access to his
kids at any time, which I thinkis pretty dope, because we have

(08:37):
some people that are like bittertowards their, you know,
ex-partner or whatnot, and so mydad was always in our life, he
was very active in our life andso I would say again, we had a
pretty good childhood.
What I would say is that, as aLatina growing up, my parents
did work a lot of hours becausethey wanted to provide.
So we kind of raised ourselvesin a way.
So there was like no realstructure, like I could like lie

(08:59):
and say I did homework and Iain't never do my homework, kind
of thing, you know.
So that kind of structure wasmissing, and not because they
didn't want to do it, they justdidn't have the time to do it
and so fast forward.
You know, we're growing up.
My mama was a little more free,like oh yeah, I want to go
outside, go ahead.
She went, I swear, get home atthis time, no curfew.
And my daddy, he was morestructured, you know, in her own

(09:28):
world kind of thing, and so, um, I would say for me as a young
lady at the time, um, I kind ofgrew up way faster than I should
have.
Um, and I think that's because,again, my mama, she, she was a
great mom, like.
She made sure she was active,of course, but she also still
wanted to live her life.
And so, seeing that as anexample, seeing her getting
dressed up to go to club withher friends, I'm over here 14,
like, oh, I want to wear a bellyshirt.
You know, I want to dress uplike that because that was what

(09:50):
I saw and so, innocently, theseare the things that I wanted to
do.
So I was, you know, trying toget my aunt's ID to go to the
club at 16, sneaking into theclub, you know, acting like I'm
18 and I'm not, you know.
So a lot of that was going on.
So, fast forward to the age of17.
Something occurred where my mamawas, she was out of the country

(10:11):
.
She, she will always travel toher, to the Dominican Republic,
to visit, like my grandparentsand stuff.
And so this specific summer,which was 2012, she ends up
going to Dominican Republic andshe's like, ok, y'all, every
time she'll leave, she'll sayy'all be good, y leave.
She'll say y'all be good, y'allold enough to watch yourselves,
but your daddy is a coupleblocks away, so he's gonna be
watching y'all too.
Um, and I was like all right,cool, so that's kind of how.

(10:32):
She kind of left us um under mydad's supervision, but really
our own, and so, anyway, um, sothere was a specific day during
that time.
This was now in September.
Well, let me back up to thesummertime real quick.
So that summer, you know, a lotof things were happening like

(10:53):
weird things, supernatural, likespiritual things, spiritual
warfare.
I didn't know that that's whatit was then.
Now I do, but there was a lotof spiritual warfare going on
within my brother, my brotherFrankie, and you know he was
like gangbanging, he was like inthe Latin Kings and all that
kind of stuff.
So he was like dealing with alot of like Santeria and like

(11:13):
all this kind of stuff.
You know spiritual stuff.

Speaker 1 (11:16):
Explain to the audience what Santeria is, just
in case they don't understand.

Speaker 3 (11:25):
Well, I don't really know, by definition, what it is,
but I do know it's when you'redibbling and dabbling with
spirits that are not of GodWitchcraft, maybe you asked me.
So he would come home sometimessome nights and he'll say to my
mama Mom, the devil is after me, I can't, and my mama would
have to come and pray over himbecause he would be like
freaking out.
And I used to just be like andand fast forward to I'm sorry,

(11:48):
but back back, back back when Iwas like 10, I saw someone
possessed like with a demon inthe Dominican Republic.
So now it all makes sense, butthen it didn't.
But now it does and I'llexplain in a second.
So, anyway, fast forward to2020, 2012.
My brother would come home andhe would have those moments
quite often, and so fast forwardto September.

(12:15):
I was kind of like veryoverwhelmed.
I'm 17 years old, my mama's onvacation, my brother's kind of
out of it.
He's been very angry andfrustrated and he's just been
showing up in a way that was newto me, because he and I were
best friends from when we werekids up until teenage years, and
so this one day it wasSeptember 7th.
I remember this day so clearly.
I was at work.

(12:36):
I used to work at this likemedical office as like a
receptionist, and I was 17 yearsold and I was headed back home
and my friends was like hey,we're going to pick you up so we
can go dye our hair at ourhouse and blah, blah, blah.
I'm like all right, cool, butbefore you guys come pick me up,
I want to pass by my housebecause I want to check
something really quickly.
So the night prior to that mybrother and I got into an
argument because he had a dogand I was like doing something.

(13:01):
I was like bringing stuff inand out the house that night and
the dog randomly ran out thehouse and I kept trying to find
this dog and I like I don't knowwhere he went.
So quickly Like the dogdisappeared, like I don't know
where he went.
So I'm like walking up thestreets calling this dog's name.
Dog, nowhere to be found.
So that night when he got homeI was like yo, bro, I got to
tell you something.
He's like what I said your dogis missing.

(13:21):
Like I opened the door, I wastaking stuff in and out the
house to put in dad's car.
I don't know where the dog isat.
He immediately became so angryhe was like he just started
cursing me out Where's my dog?
You know what you're doing?
He thought I intentionally likegot rid of his dog and I was

(13:42):
just like I didn't.
I didn't do that, you know, Iwas innocently like I did not do
that, and so the next day Iwanted to go home because from
that night moving towards thenext day, he kept threatening me
like watch, you did that to mydog.
Now when you come home, I'mgonna sell everything in your
room, I'm gonna take all yourstuff and I'm gonna break it.
So he was.
So now I'm at work and I'm likethinking about your stuff,
thinking about my stuff and I'mlike I actually work.

(14:03):
So my parents give us everythingbut me working.
I was able to get my littlethings, you know.
And I'm like, oh no, I got togo home.
Make sure he ain't do nothing,because like he really needs to
know that I did not do thatintentionally, like the dog
really just disappeared, like hejust ran out the house.
And so, anyway, I get home andwhen I walk in the house, when,

(14:26):
when I walk into the house, he'sthere, my cousin is there and
my other brother is there.
So, remember, I have twobrothers, kelvin, frankie, and
my cousin was there, and so theywere all hanging out at the
house.
So I walk in the house and I gointo my room to make sure
everything is, you know,everything's all set and all
good.
And when I walk into my room,he barges into my room and he's
like where is my cell phone?
And I'm like, huh, he's likeyou took my phone.

(14:46):
It was in the living room, youtook it.
I'm like, bro, I didn't takeyour phone.
I walked in the house and Iliterally just came straight to
my room.
I'm leaving Like I don't wantno beef, you know.
So right now, and like nowwhere I am today.
I look at that and it wasspiritual warfare because it was
so much confusion.
He's thinking I'm doing thingsI'm not doing.
It was just a lot going on inthat moment.
And so he's like you took myphone and then he literally so

(15:10):
when I walked into my room, Ihad my purse on the dresser,
which had my phone, my bag, mywallet, all that stuff in it.
He literally grabs my phone.
So my phone is there, the bagis here.
He literally just grabs myphone and he's like until you
don't give me my phone, I ain'tgiving you your phone.
And I'm like, again, innocently, I'm like, bro, I don't have
your phone.
So now he's like getting himselftogether to leave the house and
I'm like nah, bro, you, you notleaving this house on my phone,

(15:32):
like you're not leaving thishouse on my phone Cause I know
that I didn't take your phone.
So now I'm feeling a littlebullied, like I'm overwhelmed,
cause now I'm like man lastnight, you think I'm doing
something to you.
Today, you think it's this Like.
Now I'm overwhelmed.
So now he leaves the house andhe walks away with my phone.
So I start going after himbarefoot.
I'm like, I'm like yo give memy phone.

(15:52):
He's like I ain't giving younothing.
Oh wait, I missed the part.
Let me back up a little bit.
Before he walks out the house,I go to the kitchen.
He's in the living room gettinghis stuff together to leave.
I go to the kitchen and I'mlike in my mind I'm like he's
not about to leave with my phone, like I'm not about to just let

(16:12):
you do this to me right now,like you're not going to bully
me, you're not going to, justfor lack of a better term?

Speaker 2 (16:17):
Did he bully you a?

Speaker 3 (16:18):
lot.
He didn't bully me, but duringthis year it was a lot of that
going on and I was kind of justlike I'm not with it and, for
lack of a better term, I'm fromBrooklyn.
So I kind of just felt like hewas sunning me.
You know, I felt like he wassunning me so I'm like yo,
you're not going to sun me rightnow, you know.
And so I was like all right, Iwent to the kitchen and I don't

(16:39):
want to say like any siblingdoes, any sibling does, but for
the most part, anytime I'vespoken to siblings who were able
to relate to my story, you know, I went to the kitchen and grab
a knife.
And I grabbed the knife becauseI intended to go up to him and
say give me my, give me my phone, and just kind of scare him,
you know, with this knife in myhand.
But when I grabbed the knifefrom the kitchen and I walked

(16:59):
towards the living room while hewas getting himself together to
leave, I immediately snappedback in.
So I was like what am I doingwith this?
I'm like this ain't even me,like not even to scare somebody,
this ain't me.
So I literally tossed the knifeto the side.
He walks out the door.
I go after him.
I'm like give me my phone, giveme my phone.
He walks like he was like alittle bit of block, like ahead

(17:26):
of me in a way, and I said I'mjust gonna walk away because if
we do get into argument oraltercation he gonna beat me up.
Because I'm a girl, I'm justgonna leave it alone.
So I turn away to go.
He turns back and he starts tofollow me.
So I'm like, oh nah, like bro,you think I took your phone.
I didn't take it.
You take my phone as a way toget back.
Get back at me, I let let yougo, you come back.

(17:46):
All right, now again, I see itas spiritual warfare.
That was not my brother, Idon't care how anybody puts it,
like that's just my revelation.
So he comes, he turns aroundand comes after me and as he's
walking behind me, we're like alittle far.
You know, we have this distancebetween us.
He's behind me, me, he'scalling me all sorts of names
you, this, you that, you this,you.

(18:07):
That I feel like he, low-key,had like a some sort of
resentment towards my mom and Iresemble my mom a lot and so I
think for him because thatsummer she had kicked him out
the house because he wasgangbanging.
So I think he had so much angerand there was no one to let it
out on and I was like theclosest thing to a mother, you
know.
I mean I was like the closestthing to to mother because when

(18:28):
my mom was gone I was the onlygirl at the house.
So I'm the one cooking, I'm theone making sure they ate, and
doing this and doing that.
So I think for him theresentment that he had towards
my mama was like what he wasthrowing at me, he was calling
me all types of things.
So finally we make it to thefront of the house.
Um and I'm sorry this is kindof long.

Speaker 2 (18:44):
I never expressed it to this, to this detail.

Speaker 3 (18:48):
Um, so we make it to the front of the house and, um,
the porch of the house, and um,I'm standing like on the on the
steps, like towards the maindoor of the house, and he's like
on the sidewalk, kind of.
So I'm like yo, why did youcome?
Why come?
Why did you come back?
Like go with the phone, likewhat's your issue with me?
I don't, I don't get what's theissue?
Like in my mind.

(19:08):
I'm like yo, we best friends,like where all this hostilities
coming from?
Like, I'm so confused.
He was just so angry.
So now he starts to walk up andnow he's like at the, the
bottom step.
I'm like all the way at the top.
Let's just say the distance ismaybe where that cup is to where
I am, and he's a little bitlower.
I'm a little higher because I'mup the step and he literally
just again he says some meanthings and then he literally

(19:29):
hawk spits at me and itliterally lands in my face and
at that moment I literallystarted to cry, because I'm like
bro, like, and I'm crying nowbecause, regardless of what,
like, I just hated that.
That was what he was goingthrough in that moment and I
couldn't see that it wasspiritual and I couldn't, I

(19:50):
didn't know how to fight that.
But in that moment when he spitat me, I just looked at that
and you know, when you're fromthe streets I feel like for me
the lowest thing somebody coulddo is spit at you and I'm just
like dang, like like when I tellyou that was my road dog, like
my brother was.
So it really hurt me when hedid that and so I literally was

(20:14):
like bro, but what did I ever doto you?
To like what's going on?
And he did it again.
So now at this point I go in thehouse and now he and my brother
start to kind of tussle,because now he's trying to come
in the house where I'm going,towards, where I'm going, and so
my brother and him they kind ofstart to tussle in the
vestibule because now my brother, kelvin, is like all right,

(20:34):
like enough is enough, and sonow they're tussling.
So when I get to the livingroom part I go back where I
threw the knife, and so I grabthe knife and he and Kelvin are
tussling.
And when he walks in the houseI have the knife in my hand.
He stands in front of me, likesuper close to me and he's like
go ahead, do it.
Like he's in my face, likesuper close, telling me go ahead

(20:57):
, do it, do it.
And then he like kind of likeum, jerked at me and my reflex,
just yeah, and it punctured himin his collarbone right here and
it happened so fast, like sofast, fast.
And when it, when it happened, Iremember I went to the kitchen

(21:19):
and my brother, he just likewent like this and he walks out
with Kelvin, like Kelvin, justlike your car is, and he walks
out.
When I drove a knife in thesink there was like barely any
blood on it.
So I'm thinking in my mind thatI didn't hurt him bad.
Like I'm thinking it was likeliterally, when I like you ever
seen a steak knife, like thevery tip of it, like that's all

(21:41):
you seen, it wasn't like a, youknow what I mean.
Like it was literally like a.
And so when my, when, when Ithrow the knife down, my
brothers, they go outside and mybrother is screaming, kelvin is
screaming, help somebody, helpcall the ambulance.
So I'm like ain't no way he'shurt like that, because I know
that's not what just happened.
So I get on the phone as soon asI throw the knife, I grab

(22:03):
because remember he was in theliving room with myself.
So I grab the phone, I'mcalling my dad.
I said Pa, oh my God.
And I I literally rememberwalking out the house with this
phone in my hand, telling my dadthat I just said Frankie,
kelvin and Frankie are sittingon the stoop.
Frankie is sitting there likethis with Kelvin behind him, and

(22:25):
I walked by them and I sit inthe middle of the street to talk
to my dad.
I'm like barefoot, in shorts, awhite tank top.
I'm just like calling my dadbecause I'm like in my head I'm
like yo, my brother ain't aboutto die, like I'm thinking he
about to go to the hospital butwhen this is all over, he going
to beat my butt, like that'swhat I'm thinking, you know.
But I literally like that's oneof like out of many regrets,

(22:47):
one of the many is walking by mybrother while he was sitting
there just holding his collarCause.
I didn't know he was literallyhe was basically internally
bleeding and I didn't know that.
So he basically had a cardiacarrest.
That was the cause of his death.
That's what kind of went, thankyou, that's what kind of
happened.
Um, after you know, um, thewhole the incident happened and

(23:12):
so, and so at this time,remember, my friends were coming
to pick me up.
So my girl, literally, shepulls up in the middle of all
this happening and she's likecome on, get in the car.
I'm like Nina, I can't get inthe car.
And I'm like Nina and I tellher what happened.
So she hops out the car, shegoes, looks at my brother and
she's like, oh, he's good, he'sgood, come on, let them go to
the hospital with him.

(23:33):
You come on, let's wait foryour dad to come.
And we just all won't gettogether.
So I'm like you sure, nina.
So I trusted what she said,because she used to be a dental
assistant and I'm thinking, Idon't know why I correlated that
with a doctor.
But I listened to her and Isaid all right, let's go.

(23:58):
Yeah, I stabbed him.
She's like I'm so sick of this.
Like this is what she says outof her, says it's out of
frustration, because she's likeI'm tired of these siblings
fighting, I'm tired of all thearguments and the nonsense.
So she says that out of hermouth.
I get to my friend's house.
I'm sitting there.

(24:19):
My dad calls me.
He's like what's going on?
What happened?
So I tell my dad what happened.
He says your car is listeningto me, do not leave that house,
stay there, I'm going to comeget you.
I'm like all right, cool.
So next thing, you know, I getthere, my cousin is there and my
friend Nina is there, and mycousin gets a text saying
Frankie's dead and I'm like Idon't believe that.
I did not believe it.

(24:41):
I refuse.
I was so in denial.
But I refuse to believe it inthat moment because I'm like nah
, my dad's on his way to thehospital.
Until my dad doesn't saysomething to me, I don't believe
it.
My dad texts me.
He says he's gone.
In that moment when I tell you,my whole world froze.
Like I was.

(25:01):
I remember sitting outside onmy friend's porch and I remember
just literally staring to thesky and I was just like what?
Like it?
It just it blew my mind.
I was just like ain't Like it,just it blew my mind.
I was just like ain't no way.
My brother's not here, and somy dad, now he's in a place
where, as a man, as a father,he's like man.
I just lost my son, but I can'tlose my daughter to the system,

(25:23):
because I know my daughter'sheart, I know their relationship
, I know this was a freakaccident, that this was not the
intention for it.
And so now he's like your car,he calls me.
He's like your car is stayingin the house, don't let nobody
see you.
I'm coming.
So I'm like all right.
So I go in the house.
Next thing, you know, these FBIagents come and they're knocking

(25:44):
on my friend's door and they'relike where's your car?
We know she's here.
She needs to come out, if notwe're going to get a bigger team
and get her out.
So now I'm like scared Cause,I'm like where's my dad?
And so I go in her shack.
She had like a shack in heryard.
So I go in, I hide in there.
They still kind of came to itthrough the drive-thru and they
were like listen, we know you'rein there.
We know what happened.
Your brother is a witness rightnow in the precinct.

(26:06):
We know what happened.
We're not here to hurt you, wejust need you to come out.
So I just like stood there.
I remember just being so scaredbecause like it's just so much
happening at once and Iliterally was like all right.
So I came out and they lookedat me.
I really remember their likewhole reaction.
They I guess they wereexpecting to see like yeah, a

(26:27):
big, tough girl or something.
I don't know.
But when they saw me they waslike, like you can see that
their hearts even like dropped.
And so they were like listen,we're going to have to take you.
And I said, but can we pleasejust wait for my dad?
Like I just want to wait for mydad, like that's it.
And they were like, okay, we'llwait for your dad.
And so literally we sat infront of the suit they didn't
handcuff me or anything and wejust waited for my dad.

(26:48):
The minute my dad pulls up, heliterally pulls up.
And the way he parked his car,man, like I told my dad today
like when I think of the love ofGod, I think of him, because
the way my dad loves me and theway he's shown up for me is the
same way God has.
Like my dad, his heart neverchanged towards me, none of my
family, and I'm so grateful forthat, you know.

(27:19):
But the way my dad pulled up atthat scene, he got out that car
.
He said y'all not taking mydaughter.
And that's him as a man cryingbecause he's like yo, my son, my
daughter, like he's he.
I'm sure he felt like a failureat that moment and so he got
out the car.
He's like y'all not taking mydaughter.
And they had to calm him down.
And I looked at my dad.
I said, dad, it's okay, i'ma go, like it's cool, i'ma go, it's
all right.
And when, like he looked at me,you could tell that he just
felt defeated.

(27:40):
And so I go in the precinct,whatever.
And you know, I get there andmy whole family's already there
crying and screaming.
And when I get there, thecrying and screaming, and when I
get there, the investigators,they are asking me questions
because now, at this point, theystill got to do their job.
So they're looking at me likethis murderer, like this
intentional murderer.
And I was like you know, Idon't want to speak until I get

(28:01):
my lawyer, you know, becausethat's what my dad told me to
say.
And so I did.
And when they at me he said yoKyrus, he said I don't hate you
Like.
And you know Kelvin stillsuffers to this day with this
Like he.

(28:21):
It weighs on him a lot but hestill loves me like heavy.
He and I are like super closestill, you know.
But he told me he wanted to takethe charge because he didn't
want me to go through that,because he knew it wasn't my
intention.
And I said nah, I said I knowthis wasn't my intention, but I
still had no right to pick up aknife, to think that I could
even scare or hurt somebody.
That was not cool.
So I took accountability forthat.

(28:43):
Unfortunately it led to that,but I still took accountability
for it.
And so, fast forward, you know Iwent to court.
You know I went to court.
You know they, they denied mebail.
Um, they were offered.
At first it was a murder in thefirst degree.
Um, second degree, sorry, and Iwas 25 to life.
But I had a really good lawyer.

(29:04):
My father paid over 60 grandfor a lawyer, um, and they, they
built, I guess, uh, they DA,and the DA.
She literally had them bring meout of Rikers Island to her
office.
She sat me there and saidthere's a lot of people that
don't want to see you go downthe hall like down a hole, like
that.
Your family still loves you,they still support you, but I

(29:25):
got to give you something.
I can't just let you walk.
She said if you want to try towalk, you could go to trial, and
I believe 95% out of that timeI mean 95% chance you can walk,

(29:47):
because no one's against you.
She said but if you just wantto be safe, then just take to
sit, and I'm going to take thefive.
And then, once I started toserve my time, I went to Bedford
Hills Correctional Facility,which is the max prison in New
York State, and I just startedto serve my time.
But as I was serving my time, Iwas building a relationship
with Christ.
And here I am.
I'm sorry that was so long,y'all no it was good.

Speaker 1 (30:09):
It was really good, was so long y'all.
It was really good.
I mean, that was the.
I mean, like I said, man, youknow, we, we, we, we're in the
space where let's stay in therefor a second because there's
some um, I'm just gonna ask someclarification questions because
, hey, that's our duty, to kindof get to the me and this isn't
to poke holes or anything likethat just some clarifications,

(30:30):
like um, like I think in thereport it says you called the
police before you did it, butwhen you just told us you didn't
say that.
Do you remember calling?

Speaker 3 (30:39):
oh, yeah, yeah so when I first got home and he
started like before, let me seeso when he, when he got my phone
, I grabbed my brother, my otherbrother's phone and I and I
called the police and I saidthere's a stranger in my house.
Come, get him before I kill him.
So I said that because a fewweeks prior to that he and I got
into altercation and when Icalled him and said my sibling

(30:59):
and I are fighting, they tookforever to come.
And so in my mind I'm like,well, if I say a stranger's in
my house, they'll come faster.
And so that I did.
And so that's why, when the DAtold me, she said listen,
there's a 95% chance if you goto trial you could walk, but
that 5% of you doing life isfrom that call, because it
sounds like premeditation and itwasn't premeditated.

(31:22):
Again, it was me trying to getthem to get to the house fast to
avoid all of that and it didn'thappen that way.

Speaker 1 (31:27):
Got it.
So I think the next questionwould be like they claimed that
the wound was really deep, likein the reports.
That's what it claimed.
I don't know.
I done you know, and this is it.
I think I'm more so to just toyour state of mind at the time,
like your brother.
Your brother was sitting there.
You mentioned Kelvin.
He didn't feel like he was indanger either, mm-mm.

Speaker 3 (31:49):
So he didn't feel like he was in danger either.

Speaker 1 (31:50):
So nobody that was sitting there and he didn't seem
to be in danger.
No man, that's tough no.

Speaker 3 (31:57):
And that's the thing with the whole article thing you
just said.
Like I'm to this day, I'm stillon Google.
I could have paid to got allthose articles removed and I
haven't.
But one thing I can say is thatyou know they painted it like
oh, this girl is a monster.
She was always a problematicperson.

Speaker 1 (32:13):
If I was all of that, look at the fruit of my life.

Speaker 3 (32:14):
My, my family loves me absolutely people and this is
not me saying that because it'sme.
But if you want to really knowabout a person, see how much who
, who rock with them, who lovethem, who, who doesn't you know
um that's one thing, and thenanother thing is they, you know,
they said oh, she did thisbecause of a cell phone.
It wasn't because of a cellphone.

Speaker 1 (32:29):
So I said all that to say, like media, you can't
believe everything you read onthe newspapers that's the you
can't believe everything you seeon social media that was the
purpose of me giving you theability to clarify, because it's
that oftentimes, like even thereports with spiritual warfare
against you, you understand whatI'm saying, like it was meant
to.
It was meant to diminish yourwitness and shape you into

(32:52):
something that you weren't.
Oftentimes, the devil's missionis to label us the opposite of
what we truly are, or peddle ourtrue identity in front of us in
a different form.
So if you're meant to be agreat financier, he wants you to

(33:13):
be a thief.
You know what I mean.
If you're meant to be a womanwho has a ministry that is
rooted in purity, he's going towant you to be a prostitute.
My God, you know what I mean hetries to rob you of your
identity.
Exactly If you're full ofhappiness, you're full of joy.

(33:33):
The very thing that he wantedyou to be is a monster.

Speaker 3 (33:37):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (33:37):
You see what I mean and I think that why what you're
saying is important becausesuch of the public nature of
what you've been through is thatlike nobody looking at you, I
mean, I mean you know nobody.
That's what was such theinteresting thing about your
story.
Like she killed somebody, likewhat it's like you couldn't

(33:58):
imagine it you couldn't imagineit, and so, but that's that's,
that's his thing.
And that's where the beauty andthe maturity that you have to
denoted of what it is is thatthat wasn't my brother, you know
.
That wasn't.
That wasn't him.
I was being attackedspiritually by a demon that,
through practices maybe mybrother was participating in,

(34:22):
you know it, allowed him to beopen to such a you know nature
of that you know amen, and youknow what, though I can probably
say, and and and boldly saythat that curse of witchcraft
and all that over my family, itbroke.
Amen.

Speaker 3 (34:37):
It broke through me, like that generational curse has
broken through me.
And you know, again it didn'tmake sense then, but now it does
.
And that's why, again, I loveChrist so much.
Because people always ask methe main question how do I
figure out my purpose?
And it's like, first you haveto understand who he is, because
he created you right.
And understanding who he is andhe said in his word I created

(34:57):
you in my own image.
So I gained my identity, Iregained a new identity through
that suffering, through thathardship, and now I mean ain't
no telling what God can't do.
I mean this is all his gloryand his goodness.

Speaker 2 (35:15):
I was going to ask you what it meant to have the
support of your family evenduring that.
I mean, you've got all thesethings happening.
There's cops everywhere.
You're at the precinct.
You've got your dad who's liketrying to get you to stay home.
You've got your brother who'strying to take the charge, like
what.
When you look back on that,what does that mean to you?

Speaker 3 (35:32):
It's pretty significant, very significant.
At the time I didn't feel likeI was worthy of it.
When they used to come see me,I used to be like, stop coming
At first.
Before we came to a deal withthe lawyers and the DAs, I was
like I could stay here for therest of my life.
I don't care.
What do I have to live for?
You know, um, that was like my,my, my, my heart posture at that

(35:55):
time.
Um, now I look at it and againit all falls back to the first
thing I ever experienced withGod was his love, and I saw that
love through my family.
I saw that love through himwhen I would be in, you know,
praying on my knees every night,in my word, and that's why, for
me, my biggest goal in life isto let that be the first thing

(36:18):
people experience through me ishis love.
You know, I don't, you know,just because I've I've come out
of a lot of the things I used todo, I don't look down on
anybody Like I love people forwhere they're at, because
somebody had to love me forwhere I was at.
Wow, they're at because somebodyhad to love me for where I was
at.
Wow, you know what I mean.
And so we have a lot of peopleright now that you know.
I'm so happy to see so manypeople coming to Christ.
But you got some people goinginto this self-righteous mode
where, oh, I'm holier thanbetter than you, but hold on now

(36:41):
, somebody had to love you whereyou was at you know they still
have to love you.

Speaker 1 (36:45):
you should not sin.

Speaker 3 (36:46):
You should abide by the word of God, but the main
thing he is is love, and Ibelieve that the best way to
bring people closer to him is byloving them.

(37:09):
I don't care what you do, howyou walk, what you.
I'm going to love on youbecause that's going to make you
look at me and say I want toknow that Jesus, because these
other Christians, they, theydone rebuked me and sent me on
my way, amen.
And so my thing is love onpeople.
That's the first for me, likethat's what I embody and that's
because that's what he's givenme.

Speaker 2 (37:21):
You're bigger than your.
Your worst mistake andremembering that someone maybe,
maybe situations happen, maybethey've gone through something,
but, just like your dad, when hecame home he didn't see all the
things that the media haspainted you to be.
He saw his daughter.

Speaker 1 (37:37):
He saw his daughter.
He saw a daughter.
He saw something that needed tobe protected.
And I think the beauty in thisman my pastor always talks about
this man and it's like theBible has so many different
lessons.
But if we were sitting here andI told you the sins of David

(37:59):
versus the sins of Saul in theOld Testament, the two kings
Saul's issue was pride.
David was an adultering,murdering fool.
You know what I'm saying?
That really, really, reallyloved God.
You know what I'm saying?
That really, really, reallyloved God.
You know what I'm saying?
Where Saul really really lovedhimself and one was made unfit

(38:19):
to serve and the other one wasanointed king, knowing what he
would become.
And what it often says to me isthat we overanalyze people's
actions and underanalyze theirheart.
Like we put a lot of inventoryon what we see.

(38:43):
We put a lot of inventory onwhat we say.
See, we don't put a lot ofstake in what we can't judge
based based on our limitedunderstanding of the power of
God.
Because when I go throughscripture, when I go through

(39:05):
scripture, I don't see peoplethat we would, that we get
selected today.
You know what I mean, like whenyou really get down into the
nitty gritty of things.
You talk about a Moses.
You talk like I mean again, amurderer, not living into his
identity.
He's been Egyptian but makesthe choice Won't get circumcised

(39:25):
, won't circumcise his kidAfraid, afraid to speak, has to
weak.
They got to hold up his arms,right, gideon.
You know he's hiding Like it'sso many examples whether it's
Saul that became Paul in the NewTestament.
It's like, if we really reallylook at the Bible, these people

(39:47):
today, we would like me for realImagine Jesus walking here
today.
They would call him a falseteacher.
It's just what we is and Ithink we have to be very, very
careful.
We have to be very, verycareful and appreciative that if
your experiences don't allowyou to relate to the difficult

(40:08):
struggles certain people wentthrough, you need to get on your
hands and knees and be gratefulthat you never had to
experience sexual immorality,that you never had to experience
what it's like to need to roband kill and steal to make a
make a way, what it's like to bea slave to money.

(40:30):
What is like these things?
It's not something to beself-righteous and look down on
people about Sadducees andPharisees.
Be self-righteous and look downon people about Sadducees and
Pharisees.
It's something to thank yourholy stars that God positioned
you in such a way to know himand love him early on.
It's kind of it's one of theparables of Jesus where he talks
about.
I think he talked about how,like the reward, whether you

(40:54):
showed up 99, I think it's yearsago you show up an hour before,
it's the same reward becauseit's years ago.
Or you show up an hour before,it's the same reward because
it's mine to give.
And what he's talking about issalvation.
And I think a lot of times weget lost in the fact that you
don't have to.
You don't have to becomeenvious of someone that, on

(41:16):
their dying bed, wants to givetheir life to God.
Like you know, a lot of themsay, oh, their heart ain't in
that.
You don't have to do that.
You should hope and pray thatthat person gets saved right
then you know why.
Because, yes, although they didnot get to live, their
punishment is that for all theyears they lived on earth they
weren't with him.

(41:37):
Is that for all the years theylived on earth they weren't with
him.
Your blessing is that for themajority of the years on earth
you were with him and instead ofwe should be rejoicing, no
matter what, like it's, like thepeople in the comment section
calling somebody a false teacher.
That false teacher comes out.
That person you assume has illintent comes out and tells you

(41:59):
their actual intent.
If they are lying, what benefitdo you get from looking at
their truth and calling it a lie?
I just think that we go throughthese big gaps, these big
chasms, like we want to diminishwitness so badly.

(42:22):
My God, when the greatest likewe talk about all the commands
of the Bible, all of thecommands he said the greatest of
them all is to love thyneighbor as thyself and as you
love me.
It's not to expose falseteachers, it's not to.
It's not to call people out,it's not to be the best, it's

(42:49):
the study to show yourselfapproved.
But that's not the greatestcommandment.
Even the great commission ain'tthe greatest commandment.
The greatest commandment islove, and I'm not on some love,
love, love, no truth.
I'm saying that there's areason.
That's the greatest commandment, because when you put love
first, it covers a multitude.
It covers not the multitude, itfulfills the whole law.

Speaker 3 (43:10):
My God, that's good.
Come on now.

Speaker 1 (43:13):
That's what it is.
That's why it is the one itfulfills the whole.
There is no.
You cannot sin putting the loveof another person first.
Love Agape, god's love.
You can't, my God, you can't.

Speaker 3 (43:35):
If I love you, I can't sin against you because
God is love, you know what youcan't.

Speaker 1 (43:39):
I think we lose sight of that If you in no comments
love Say you know what.
Man Maverick, I don't know whaty'all got going on.
Your car is out, girl.
You a little willy nilly for me.
You know, what I'm saying, butlove, because you'll see that,
and I say, man, maybe this issomething we need to reflect on
versus y'all false teachers,y'all Satanists, y'all brother

(44:02):
man, let me tell you, go ahead.

Speaker 2 (44:03):
Well, I was going to say I think when we do that, we
diminish the power of God'spower in someone's life to you
know, it's like what you'resaying.
You know, we know this in ourlives Sometimes people just have
moments where they do thingsthey shouldn't do and things
just go bad.
But God can still do something.
Amazing and I think that's atestament to the fact that
you're sitting here sharing yourstory is that there are these

(44:26):
clear moments, and I love theway that you even retell the
story God fighting to likeredeem the image of yourself.
That, I think, is like beingyou're struggling with, you're
fighting with like you see yourdad fighting to say like no,
that's my daughter, yourbrother's coming after you.
And I think for me, when I waslistening to the story, I'm like

(44:48):
, and it's the power of the Lordreminding you, even in your
darkest moment, I've got a planfor you.
I still love you, I put peoplearound you that are here for you
and you're not alone.
And so, yeah, I'm in totalagreement with what you're
saying that's beautiful.

Speaker 3 (45:02):
I mean so much is running through my mind right
now as you guys are all speaking.
So last night I had a beautiful, supernatural, amazing
encounter with the Holy Spiritand I remember, just because I
don't look at this as a oh myGod, look at me, y'all look
where I'm at.
It's like I'm on assignment,like I know God called me here

(45:23):
because I know there's going tobe not just hundreds, but
thousands, maybe millions,listening to this and being
impacted by it.
And so I'm like Lord, prepareme, allow me to decrease before
you fill me up, empty me out.
If I'm full of me, remove it.
And so I was going through thatand then a few other things,
right, and my moments with him,intimate time, and literally he
spoke to me.
He says yo, kyrus, like, evenwhen you fall short, even when

(45:44):
you don't feel like you'reenough, I still look down from
heaven and I still smile at youbecause of your heart, because
you are a woman after my heart,and we're living in a time with
social media where, you know, Idon't want to say I'm gullible
or naive, but because of thelove that I radiate, I used to
view the world from my own lens,like there's nothing but love

(46:04):
here, like I had one of mymentors say, man, they pulling
Christ out of everything.
I said really, because all I seeis Jesus everywhere.
And they're like, yeah, becausethat's your algorithm.
But the world is dark.
And I didn't believe it until,or at least I didn't want to see
it, because I'm like ain't noway, and I see it now.
There is a lot of darkness andthat tells me that I got more
work to do and not that I couldsave the world per se.

(46:26):
But I need to allow my light toshine, raise your spark like so
big and not let anything turnit off right.
And so that's why, for me, it'slike people may say things
about me.
They may not like that I'vebeen called, not like that I've
been chosen.
But hey, baby, I didn't makethat decision, he did, and so
now I'm going to take it and runwith it, right.

Speaker 2 (46:47):
And I'm allowed it.

Speaker 3 (46:48):
I'm going to allow it to multiply and, and you know,
I'm just grateful, I'm justgrateful.

Speaker 1 (46:55):
Talk more about Raise your Spark.
What is?
It how did you start it?
Why did you start it?
What's the mission?
Talk to us about it.

Speaker 3 (47:07):
So Raise your Spark is my women's ministry and even
I even struggled a lot withcalling it a ministry because it
was hard for me to step intowho God fully called me to be,
especially seeing what people inministry go through with
today's society.
Like, cancel them, cancel it'sall this.
Cancel culture and expose.
I have people tell me that Godcalled them to use their
platform to expose people.
The Lord didn't call you to dothat because you're dividing,
you're spreading hate, you'regossiping, really, because what

(47:29):
is gossip?
You want me to believe yourperspective and your opinion and
you're trying to recruit peopleto do the same.
Sound like a cult to me, right?
So name sound like a cult to me, right?
So for me it's like ain't Godain't tell you to do that?
Because even when he had, like,let's say, the prophet Isaiah,
he sent him to the nation.
He said my church, our people,the nation.

(47:49):
He ain't say yo, kairos, go, goto her.
No, us as a people, us as anation.
But you have people who arebeing assigned and used by the
enemy to just single out peopleand break the church down,
divide the church, and sobecause of that, and many, the
church down, divide the church.
And so, because of that andmany other reasons, I'm like
Lord, I'm cool with being thegirl that love Jesus, and that's
it.
I don't want to be a pastor, Idon't want to be called a
minister because I don't want todeal with that.
But God says no, baby, you'regoing to do what I say you're

(48:09):
going to do.
And so I, finally, I want tosay back in 2022, you know, for
since I've been home, I've beenposting videos on Instagram,
just sharing my testimony, justbeing a voice for God and just
being someone who just helpsbring the light into people's
situation and just remindingpeople that your past does not
define you.
And so, through all of that, Ihad a lot of women reach out and

(48:30):
say can you mentor me?
And because I didn't want to dothat, I was like I'm cool, I
don't want to do that.
I ran from it.
And so, finally, in 2022, Isaid you know what I'm going to
surrender finally to what God istelling me to do.
And so, through that Rage, yourSpark was born and what I do is
.
Well, what I did was I startedto do these Mindset Monday calls
and every Monday, literally forthe past two years, I do these

(48:53):
group mentorship calls where wetalk about different topics,
whether that's financial,literacy, social media, but it's
all.
The anchor and the foundationof it all is Jesus.
Because I tell women all thetime like we can't be so
heavenly bound that we're noearthly good.
So we still have to be able tooperate here, Right, but Christ
has to be our firm foundation.
So I always give them that.
But you know I have liketherapists get on the calls and

(49:13):
you know, help them go through,you know just healing and
overcoming traumas and thingslike that.
So the overall goal for Raiseyour Spark is a place where
women can come and be providedresources such as mental health,
such as legal services,financial resources to help them
overcome adversity or just tohelp them reach their goals and
obtain their purpose.

(49:33):
We have over 3,000 women in ourecosystem.
I have over 500 women in myRaise your Spark app and you
know I've, in the past two yearsI've hosted like over 12 events
.
I've had a minimum of 110 womenin the room who fly in from all
over the city, the states, andthey just come in and you know

(49:54):
what I hear the most is thatthey love this ministry because
they can come in as they are,but never leave the same.
And so I'm just grateful to be avessel for God and his people.

Speaker 1 (50:06):
I mean we're really proud of that.
I mean, I think that there's somuch, especially in minority
communities, that there's a realbig need for support,
especially for women.
There's a real big need forsupport, especially for women.
I think that you know, we dohave a pandemic lack of
resources that are provided.
We have a fund called the GodProblems Fund, which we give to

(50:30):
different organizations that aredoing the work of God, and so I
think JJ and I are going tocook up a donation to raise your
spark.
I think that'll be somethingreally cool and dope that we can
do, I mean just to help youcontinue the work that you're
doing.
So we'll discuss that offcamera.
But, one of the things that Idid want to ask and I think will

(50:52):
be really important, is, likein this day and age where
there's so much important islike in this day and age where
there's so much, what do you seeas the most common mental or
emotional issues?

Speaker 3 (51:04):
that women are dealing with in your community,
within, raise your Spark, orjust in general.

Speaker 1 (51:07):
I mean in general or within Raise your Spark.

Speaker 3 (51:10):
I feel like identity and I think it's because right
now we're again.
I don't want to fully blamesocial media, because we know
the enemy right, but let's justsay social media right.
A lot of women are so lost infiguring out who they are or who
they were called to be, thatthey're struggling with loving
themselves fully and wholly asGod created them to be.

(51:32):
And so we try to just like bodydysmorphia, like just just
wanting to change how we look,you know fillers, and we're
trying to meet the standard ofan image to keep a man or
attract a man, and it's like,you know, it makes me sad and it
hurts me because, again, I knowthat everything I created was

(51:55):
beautifully and wonderfully madeRight.
We look at the ocean, the sky,the stars, the moon and we're
like, wow, that's beautiful andthat's who we are Absolutely.
And so what I'm seeing a lot ofwomen struggle with is that.
And as a result of that, youknow, we're seeing women, you
know, committing suicide.
We're seeing women becausethey're struggling with their
identity and loving themselvesfor who they were created to be.

(52:18):
We're seeing them stay in, youknow, toxic relationships longer
than they should.
We're seeing women, you know,just truly giving up and not
feeling adequate or worthyenough to open up their mouth to
share their truth, to share whoGod called them to be and what
God is doing in their life.
So that's what I'm seeing is anidentity Christ, even in men.

(52:39):
Because for men and that's thething, like I love that God is
leading me to women.
But I want to help men too,because, you know, being that I
grew up with my brothers and mydad I'm seeing men also go
through that struggle, likey'all you know not you guys, but
men in general are strugglingwith I got to have a specific
car, or I have to spend acertain amount of money, and if
I don't do this, I don't meetthe standard, I'm not valuable
enough.
And so I think, as a nation, asa people, we're struggling with

(53:01):
identity, and I think thesolution to that is again, I'm
as transparent and as authenticas I possibly can be, because I
believe that gives people thepermission to do the same.
And so I think, as the light ofthis world, if we just continue
to show up and be real aboutwho we are, that lets another

(53:22):
sister or brother say you knowwhat I can be?
Me instead of love, like Iposted myself today on the
flight with no makeup, I have onsome.
Now a little bit.

Speaker 2 (53:28):
But on the flight.

Speaker 3 (53:29):
I had nothing, and I'm like you know.
A lot of women are strugglingwith doing that, and so I think,
as a light of the world, wejust have to be more boisterous
and saying, like bro, about ourflaws and about the things that
people normally don't talk about, and that's the thing with me.
You saw me crying on Instagram.
I know some people be likeshe's doing that for attention.
Nah, we all cry.

Speaker 2 (53:47):
Yeah, for sure.

Speaker 3 (53:48):
But guess what, I ain't worried about the people
talking about me because I'mcrying.

Speaker 2 (54:00):
I'm focused on the people.
Everything was with the family.
How maybe God has been maybeputting some of the pieces back
together.
Now that you're out with familyyour, your brother now you
mentioned him earlier how aremom and dad doing?
How is like, how do you see Godeven redeeming your story still
now that you're on the otherside of it?

Speaker 3 (54:18):
Amen, so my family is now saved.
I want to say that.

Speaker 2 (54:22):
Wow.

Speaker 3 (54:22):
Yeah, so my mama, she's Dominican and so you know
she was doing her little onesand twos.
You know, I seen it as a kid,you know.
So she's saved, she got savedlast year.
My dad also is saved, wow, youknow.
So she was, she saved.
She got saved last year.
My dad also is saved, wow, mydad was just.
Actually.
He pulled up to Houston like aweek ago.
He pulled up on me.
We was hanging out.

(54:43):
My mom was just here, I justhad my.
I do this annual event it'scalled the design for destiny,
um event, um summit and my mompulled up and we were kicking it
.
I talk to my parents every day,so, honestly, it's not that we
act like nothing happened, butit's just love.
It's so mighty and so strongthat we don't sit here.

(55:03):
I can't remember the last timewe ever even had a conversation
about the situation.
We never do, like my family,from aunts to uncles, to cousins
like I mean, the love of God,honestly, everything is I
couldn't.
I'm blessed, I'm really reallyblessed.
I'm really really blessed.
I'm really really blessed.

Speaker 1 (55:21):
When you first start coming into communities of faith
, giving your past, your history, did you feel accepted?

Speaker 3 (55:30):
I did, and let me tell you why Because God already
accepted me, so I had themindset of whoever don't, that's
their business that's theirproblem.

Speaker 1 (55:38):
Let me tell you so.
I had the mindset of likewhoever don't, that's their
business, that's their problem.

Speaker 3 (55:40):
And I ain't got time for that.
You know, like I'm, I'm, I'mvery let me put it like this I
am very, very secure in who I am.
I am very aware of who I wascalled to be.
I'm very, you know, confidentin my identity and I just know
that if he's yes, if he says yes, nobody can say no.
That's just my attitude towardslife in general.

Speaker 2 (56:05):
What's amazing is, earlier you had said, before all
this happened, you were stillmaybe trying to figure that out,
like you were still trying tobe confident in who you are and
figure out your identity.
So it's like you've got thisall of these things that have
now that identity being securenow leads you into your purpose
of now helping other ladies andnow, hopefully, men get to know

(56:27):
the Lord through who he'screated them to be, but also to
celebrate that as as partners inthe kingdom of God.
I think that's really special.

Speaker 3 (56:36):
Amen.
And yeah, it's.
It's important because, again,once you know who you are and
you understand whose you are,there's nothing too hard for God
to do.
Once you just come intoacceptance of, like daughter,
stop running from me, Stoprunning from who I called you to
be.
Okay, I made you whole.
You know all things are passedaway, All things have become new

(56:56):
.
Stop walking in who you used tobe, Stop walking in who they
said you would be and startwalking in who I called you to
be.
And so now I walk into a roomlike God sent me there.
You know I speak with authority, I speak with boneness, not
because I have it all figuredout, but because I know who does
.
And so I just walk with theconfidence of knowing that I'm
straight, because if God isbefore me, who could be against

(57:16):
me?
Greatest he does in me than hedoes in the world?
So I really live my life in away where you know you asked me
earlier like, do I have any?
Like you know anybody whoinspires me and things like that
, and I don't mean this in noway Like I look at people and I
say, wow, that's beautiful,Because a while ago I remember
struggling, trying to oh, my God, I want to do what they're

(57:38):
doing and I want it to be likethat.
And God checked me one day.
He said, baby, what I'm doingthrough you is new.
You are the blueprint, so youcan look at everybody, see my
glory, give me thanks, but youare the new story.
Let it be through you.
It's, this is a new thing.
And so I look at people and I'mand I'm excited for people and
what God is doing in their lifeand I love it.

(57:58):
But again, I'm confident in him.

Speaker 1 (58:02):
Man.

Speaker 3 (58:03):
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 (58:05):
Hey, man, we listen, you are.
You remind me of my littlesister, man, really, my little
sister.
She's a dynamic pastor down inColumbia, south Carolina.
Her name is Dr Jackie Green.
She's Travis Green's wife.
I don't know if you're familiar, oh, I did.
Yeah, yeah, that's my babysister.
I love it.
And so, man like that, who it'snot, you know, who you are

(58:28):
through, who's your.
That's like one of her taglines.
So shout out to Permission RoomForward City Church that's my,
that's my family.
Forward city church that's my,that's my family, that's my
family.
Man, this is amazing.
Man, like you really have likehit a lot of these questions
already.
Like you've spoken like soeloquently, full of hope, full

(58:48):
of faith, um, this is great.
Like like you, really, man,that's what I told you before
you come into one of thesepodcasts.

Speaker 3 (59:00):
Man, you don't know, bro, you don't know, you don't
know what you're going to get,but I thank y'all for creating
this platform Because, let metell you, you guys are also
doing ministry.

Speaker 1 (59:09):
Absolutely.

Speaker 3 (59:09):
Because, you know you show up as you, you're showing
up as you.
This is like it's so beautifuland it's definitely ordained and
orchestrated by God.
This is no coincidence and Iwant to thank you guys for
creating a platform, because somany people try to get me to
speak on my story and I neverfelt safe enough because I felt
like it was like I need a storyso I can pop, because I know.

(59:31):
You know what.
I had an experience where Icame into business partnership
with someone and they knew mystory would sell and make us
millions of dollars.
But because I said you knowwhat?
Y'all ain't finna get rich offmy story.
We ain't doing that.
I'm just going to use my storyto glorify God, and what y'all
are doing is listen.

(59:51):
We just want to help the people.
This is outreach, this isfellowship.
Like I really feel like I'm noton a podcast per se.
This is outreach, this isfellowship.
Like I really feel like I'm noton a podcast per se.

Speaker 2 (59:58):
I feel like I'm having a talk with my brothers,
so I want to say thank y'all forcreating this environment.

Speaker 3 (01:00:02):
I feel so safe.
I honestly wasn't like nervousbecause when I first first
shared my story, I was up therelike, but with y'all, I'm like
man, I'm with my brothers.

Speaker 1 (01:00:11):
Like we talking, like you know, this is great.
I'm going to be real with you.
You know, when I first saw it,I was like man.
You know, man, the world wouldbe blessed by this story, and it
was like it was always somebody.
When I initially saw it, whenwe decided to do a podcast, and
they were like we need a girl,and I said I know the perfect
one.
I had seen your story, I hadseen you talk and I had seen,
like the joy on you, man.

(01:00:41):
And just to be real, it's notoften you have, like you check a
lot of boxes.
That's just not often.
Saying it's your boldness, it'syour joy, it's your language,
it's your humility, meekness andthe journey you've been through
.
They don't generally all cometogether like that.
You know, very few people getto that level of revelation at

(01:01:03):
your age.
I'm being honest with you.
My sister, I think, is one of,if not the most dynamic female
preachers that there are outthere, and I mean you have a
wealth of potential, like theway the will, what you speak
from, the way scripture justroll and like you're sure, like

(01:01:25):
you're sure that you never off.
It's like you're sure of youknow what you know, what you
know.
It's like you only get thatfrom spending time with him.
And so you know I think thatthis was a day to you know we
gave Dante his flowers.
It's like give her her flowers.
Man, like what you've beenthrough would have shattered
most people, like not even 50%,99.9% of people could not have

(01:01:51):
come out of what you've beenthrough.
And so I'm essentially sayinglike man, you know, god has done
his thing, you have done thework.
I mean, hey, we have somemavericks sitting.
Do you have any questions forus?
You know what I mean.
We don't never get nobodyopportunity.

Speaker 3 (01:02:07):
You know?
Yes, I actually do have aquestion for y'all.
So Do you believe there's adifference between work and
purpose?

Speaker 1 (01:02:16):
Do I believe there's a difference between work and
purpose?
Do I believe there's adifference between work and
purpose?
Man, I would have to say yes,and my yes is contingent upon
this thing.
I believe that if everyoneworked in their purpose, then

(01:02:38):
the answer would be no.
I believe some people's purposeare contingent upon other
people's yeses that have yet tocome to pass.
So, therefore, can God stillget me to my person without that
person's yes?
Yes, but that's a process,right?
So you have no Aaron if Mosesdoesn't do what he's supposed to

(01:03:02):
do.
Elisha and Elisha, elisha andElisha Some people's purposes
are directly connected, and so,because of that, certain people
find themselves in thewilderness due to someone else's
delay.

Speaker 3 (01:03:19):
Yes, Wow, so your yes is bigger than you, absolutely.

Speaker 1 (01:03:24):
You know what We've been preaching this whole time.
You know what I'm saying, sothat's why I say that.

Speaker 3 (01:03:30):
That's good, that's so good.

Speaker 1 (01:03:33):
If in a perfect world , no, in the Garden of Eden, no.
If in a perfect world, no Inthe Garden of Eden, no.
In a world where free willexists, very much so.
Can your purpose be delineatedor bifurcated from your work?
Now, I just am not omniscientenough to understand how,

(01:03:55):
without everyone in theappropriate position, the answer
could be no.
I mean, you know.
I mean the answer could be yes,you know, if he's not supposed
to be a videographer and he'swaiting on me to become a pastor
here in Atlanta, what I mean?
Does he go to some other person?
If he's directly supposed toserve me in ministry and that's

(01:04:18):
his purpose, I mean, clearly hiswork can't be.
And it's not that it's can't,it's that it should be.
But there is just um, we don'tlive in a perfect world, we live
in a fallen world, and becausewe live in a fallen world,
oftentimes people's purpose isdelayed.

Speaker 3 (01:04:36):
That's a that's a great answer, because again you
just said like basically youryes is bigger than you.

Speaker 1 (01:04:42):
Everyone's yes.

Speaker 3 (01:04:43):
And and and.
Along with your yes, come yourdestiny helpers, which helps
them live in their purpose.

Speaker 1 (01:04:48):
And along with their yes, it becomes their destiny.
Helpers, and everybody's, likewe all are.
We all are contingent upon theyes of Jesus.
That's what you know what Imean.
That's the first one.
If Jesus says no, what is theworld?

Speaker 3 (01:05:03):
My God, you just made me think about.
I love this hymn.
Oh, it's a song or hymn, Idon't know, but it's this.
I need you, you need me.
We're all a part of God's body.

Speaker 1 (01:05:13):
Never heard of that song I never heard that I
haven't.
Huh, hezekiah Walker, I needyou to survive.

Speaker 3 (01:05:21):
We need each other to survive.
That's what it is.

Speaker 1 (01:05:23):
I just I mean a lot of people that work with me know
that when I came into theChristian music business, I only
knew Kirk Franklin, travisGreen and Marvin Sapp.
So no, maverick City didn'tquite exist yet.

Speaker 3 (01:05:34):
How does it feel to be in this space?
Didn't quite exist yet.
How does it feel to be in thisspace?
Because I know for me being inministry comes with certain
attacks.
Do you guys experience thatlike being in the music industry
?

Speaker 2 (01:05:43):
So we were just talking about this earlier.
I think it's like there issignificant warfare, there's
opposition, there are attacks,because what we're doing is
directly connected totransformation in people's lives
, people's eyes being open forthe first time and coming into
their own.
Yes, so absolutely, weexperienced attacks, we

(01:06:03):
experienced warfare, onethousand percent.

Speaker 1 (01:06:06):
Yeah, we, and it's a.
There's a grace.
I've become more sensitive,sensitive, um, I lacked a level
of empathy in the beginning,that that that you know, I would
see opposition is just hatersand I think, when you see, when

(01:06:29):
you look at it that way, youmiss um.
Like jesus did not have tochallenge the ph, the Pharisees
and the Sadducees he's God, he'sGod.
But he wanted them to ridthemselves of that
self-righteousness.
He wanted them to, uh, actuallyfollow him, actually follow him

(01:06:57):
.
And so when you look down uponthose in your comment section
and you don't have the samerighteous judgment for them, you
actually do them a disservice.

Speaker 2 (01:07:14):
Thank you guys.

Speaker 3 (01:07:15):
Thank you so much for coming and sharing your story.
Yes, you are welcome.
Thank you, guys.

Speaker 1 (01:07:19):
This is it.
This is Maverick on the mic.
My name is Norman.
We had an amazing, amazing,amazing, amazing episode with
Yochairis Diaz If you have notheard her story, I mean, it is
one of the most transformativeacts of resiliency I've ever

(01:07:41):
heard in the faith.
Please check out this fullepisode.
Like, share, subscribe One.
Thank you.