October 31, 2025 • 34 mins
What if midlife isn’t a map with turn-by-turn directions, but a path you create as you walk it? We open up about trading rigid timelines for a living, seasonal approach that honors detours, divine appointments, and the wisdom you’ve earned. Instead of waiting for perfect clarity, we show how to move with a lamp that lights only the next step—then build momentum through small wins, mindset shifts, and practical structure.
We dig into why the linear blueprint breaks and how to release inherited “shoulds” that no longer fit. From entrepreneurship pivots to nonlinear career moves, you’ll hear real examples of adapting plans without abandoning purpose. We unpack the power of seasons—sowing, waiting, harvesting—and how patience plus strategy prevents burnout. Setbacks become feedback. Delays become data. Hope becomes action.
You’ll also get reflective prompts to reveal what’s life-giving now, what desires keep resurfacing, and what you’re being invited to release. We talk identity, the cocoon-to-butterfly transformation, and the role of coaching and community in seeing your gifts clearly when your inner critic is loud. Expect practical tools: accountability partners, weekly reviews, and a simple way to celebrate small wins so progress compounds. Faith and action belong together; prayer guides the path, practice moves your feet.
If you’re feeling stuck, behind, or unsure of the route, this conversation offers a calming reset and a workable plan. Subscribe for more midlife strategy and encouragement, share this with a friend who needs a nudge, and leave a review to tell us what season you’re in and the next step you’re taking.
Subscribe @CoachStacyMLewis and @CoachWayneVIP
💃🏽Stacy M. Lewis
🌍 thestacymlewis.com
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Coach Stacy (00:17):
What if your midlife isn't a map with your
turn by turn direction?
But a path you create as youwalk it step by step with light
enough, just enough to see thenext step ahead.
Let's talk about it.
Coach Wayne (00:40):
You found the midlife revolution unleashed,
the space to embrace yourwisdom, reignite your passions,
and move boldly into what'snext.
I am Coach Wayne, the VIPcoach.
Coach Stacy (00:53):
And I'm Coach Stacy M.
Lewis.
We're here with insights,stories, and strategies to fuel
your midlife journey.
So take a breath, lean in.
Your revolution starts now.
Hey, hey, hey! Hey, Miss Stacy,how are you?
(01:13):
Good day, Sir Wayne.
I am well.
How are you today?
Coach Wayne (01:18):
I'm chilling, chilling, getting ready for the
season, as you can see.
Though this is not my team, Ijust chose I like yellow.
Yeah.
Coach Stacy (01:27):
Okay, all right.
Uh I like a good yellow.
You know, some say color ofhealth and all of that.
Uh so you're looking good nomatter what, sir.
Coach Wayne (01:41):
Thank you, Miss Stace.
Thank you.
It's always a pleasure workingaside alongside you, Stacey,
Midlife Revolution Unleashed.
And uh today, you know, we'regonna bust it up.
Today we're gonna talk aboutmost of us have had a plan in
terms of a path that takes usthrough life's journey, and it's
(02:05):
usually kind of linear, youknow.
We do the high school thingbefore preschool and all that,
and then we get into college orvocational school, that sort of
thing, and then we start ourfamily and start a career, and
then we go through all of thosechallenges, and then we hit
midlife, and at midlife we'resupposed to be here and we're
(02:26):
supposed to be there, right?
And then we get into retirementand old age, and we're supposed
to be, but listen, life is notlinear, and along the path,
there are roadmaps anddeviations and some appointed
divine appointments.
And today, Stacy, we want to wewant to talk all about those.
Coach Stacy (02:50):
Absolutely.
Uh, you know, the thing aboutmidlife in particular is it has
a way of dismantling or breakingdown those linear pathways,
right?
Um, so our goal today is reallyto embrace and unpack that a
little bit and really talk aboutuh how in this season or these
(03:11):
seasons we can really navigate,uh, embrace and navigate the
seasons, the detours, and thosedivine appointments that you
referred to.
So let's jump on in.
Oh, one second, Sir Wayne.
Did you introduce yourself toour listener?
Coach Wayne (03:29):
Listen, Stace.
If they watch the movies, theysee me.
I'm the guy.
So I am Coach Wayne, the VIPcoach, and really my purpose is
to help brothers navigatemidlife so that their second
half can be their best half.
And Stacy, how and what do youdo?
Coach Stacy (03:50):
I am Stacy M.
Lewis.
It is always my joy to be herewith my co-host, Coach Wayne.
I'm a midlife women's coach, anonprofit executive, and a lover
of God and his people on mostdays.
And um certainly excited totalk to have this conversation
uh and welcome you again to theMidlife Revolution Unleashed.
(04:12):
Let's jump in, Sir Wayne, andtalk about um why the blueprint
breaks at this at this point ofthe game.
Coach Wayne (04:22):
Well, you know, the truth of the matter is at any
point the blueprint can breakbecause a lot of the dogmas that
we attach to how we should liveare not even set by us.
These guardrails and these uhdogmas are created in terms of
somebody else's plan for us.
And we don't talk aboutsomebody in the way of a divine
(04:44):
plan, we're talking aboutinstitutional plans.
Uh, you know, you gotta do Abefore B.
For example, Stacy, in myworld, there are lots of people
that I'm seeing that arecreating opportunities for
themselves and others throughentrepreneurship.
And guess what they didn't do?
They didn't go ahead and do thefour-year standard college
(05:07):
degree piece, which is part ofthe blueprint.
So it's truly cyclical, and uha lot of it is organic in terms
of how life will unfold.
Coach Stacy (05:19):
I I agree, and that the the changes that we
experience, right, as we've gonethrough different phases of
that blueprint, right?
Some of us have followed theblueprint uh letter by letter,
and others, you know, have havehad missteps or or changes or
(05:40):
evolutions in the blueprint.
And the reality is that as ourlife evolves and as we sage, as
you would say, uh some of thoseold maps, those old blueprints
become irrelevant.
They're they no longer fit orcreate uh the next step that we
(06:03):
should be taking.
They they just are no longer inalignment with who we are now
and where we desire to go.
Um, sometimes those blueprintswere old and they were based on
someone else's dreams oraspirations for us.
And now we're in a season thatwe can really determine what our
(06:25):
aspirations are and start tooutline a path on how we're
gonna take the steps to getthere.
Coach Wayne (06:33):
Yeah, and as you're listening to us, you probably
are saying, Hey, Wayne, Stacy,you're talking to me because
some of you, or you inparticular, listening right
here, you know that you had aplan for what you're gonna do
after five years, say, of thejob that you're with.
And then life dealt you somestuff, you know, hill illnesses,
(06:57):
a birth, a grandchild, whateverit is.
And the plan has to adapt, ithas to change, and you have to
be agile, flexible, and bewilling to change with it.
So that linear thinking, thatABC blueprint has to go right
out the door.
Coach Stacy (07:18):
Absolutely, right out the door.
And you know, I can't help butthink of the um scripture that
talks about how God's word is alamp unto our feet, right?
So it's shining light on ourfeet, and it is a light to our
path, not to our destination,but to our path, so that we can
(07:42):
take the next step.
And so uh a great question toask yourself is where are you
still holding on to outdated tothat outdated map of your life?
And what would it look like tolet go of that?
Coach Wayne (07:59):
Yeah, stay out speak for me.
I know a few years ago, mayberight after COVID, when I
decided to fire corporateAmerica, and I went back to the
beach, burnt all the ships onthe shore, and said, this is
entrepreneurism, one wayforward, no exits.
And that was a beautiful plan.
And as I'm as it's unfoldingand the economy is unfolding
(08:20):
today, I've had to adjust thatplan.
I'm in the process right now ofcreating additions to the Wayne
brand, the VIP brand, so I canadjust accordingly as the times
demand.
Coach Stacy (08:35):
Yeah, yeah, we have to evolve.
And that is the beauty of nothaving that GPS or that clearly
defined map, that we can reallytake those next steps in a way
that helps us walk the path asit's being revealed to us, um,
(08:56):
and helps us be nimble asopposed to so fixed on the path
that we believe we were supposedto take or that map, that GPS.
And you as you talked about, itour life is really about these
seasons, right?
To everything, there is aseason, a time under the sun.
(09:18):
And so these cycles that we umare going through and the ways
that we want to move forwardrequire a path, not a fixed map.
A path is required.
Coach Wayne (09:35):
Stace seasons are so important, right?
I uh oftentimes we arepremature in trying to reap in
the sowing season, trying to dothings in the wrong season and
not understanding why we are notyielding the results.
(09:59):
In other words, you're notgonna harvest during sowing
season, it just doesn't happen.
So you have to nurture, tillthe soil, uh fertilize, and
wait, and wait, and wait, yes,and wait, and a lot of us are
not able to do that, so thatrequires a sense of insight,
(10:19):
discipline, and Stacy, faith toknow.
Coach Stacy (10:22):
Absolutely.
I'm listening, I was listeningto you, you know, say, and wait,
and wait.
And again, you know, the Biblefor for both of us, I believe,
is that basic instruction beforeleaving earth.
And what you just talked aboutwas where it says seed time and
(10:45):
harvest, right?
You have you plant the seeds,you must give it time.
And in that time, there arethings that happen, right?
Sometimes there are financialsetbacks, sometimes there are
health setbacks that youmentioned.
Um, it doesn't mean that theharvest is not on the other end,
(11:05):
it just means that the path tothat harvest is different than
we originally envisioned orplanned.
So some good.
Coach Wayne (11:16):
Yeah, in business, I would say one of the things
that uh is applicable tobrothers as well as sisters.
When you are, when you have aplan, when you have a vision,
there's a trajectory.
And oftentimes we're stuck onthe idea that we have to elevate
by taking this position in thiscompany and then this position.
(11:38):
But I have found out thatthat's not always the best uh
source to get to where you want.
Sometimes you may have to leavethe company you're now in and
go to another company, it couldbe the competition, or sometimes
you have to, as they say, ifthere isn't a setting at the
table for you, you have to bringyour own chair and set your own
(12:01):
table.
Sometimes you may have to goout and and do something for
yourself to get the opportunityto create the vision from the
aspiration that you have heldfor yourself.
Coach Stacy (12:14):
Yeah, you know, I I just keep thinking about the
reality.
You talked aboutentrepreneurship and and and how
change uh you know is sometimeneeded.
And I think aboutentrepreneurship and the reality
that some of it doesn't looklike I envisioned, right?
(12:37):
I certainly believe God is muchsmarter than I, right?
Much more uh defined in theplan and creative in the plan.
And so the plan that I havedoesn't always manifest or look
the way I thought it would.
And that is being on the path,right?
(12:59):
That's not having the map.
I would, you know, create amap, which I'm sure would would
maybe not have me in the place Ireally think it would end up.
And so um I really think thatthis is an important time to
embrace this idea of or thisreminder that our life is on a
(13:22):
path, there's not a very clearmap.
And in this autumn season, youtalked about um the harvest, um,
but I also think that this thisseason can be one of
reflection.
And you and I talked about abit of a uh a coaching prompt
(13:44):
that looks seasonal, right?
That talks about what bestdescribes your current stage of
life, we'll say.
And winter might be more likerest or stripping down.
Spring is often referred to asnew beginnings, summer is
talking about fruitfulness, andthen in autumn we have harvest
(14:07):
and reflection.
So, what a great time to reallythink about where we desire to
go next, right?
It's not the end destination,uh, it is the next destination.
And what steps do we believe weneed to take or to be in
(14:32):
alignment, right, with our call,with our purpose, with our
divine appointment, as you said?
Um, what are those steps thatwe need to take that will help
us move down the path?
Coach Wayne (14:45):
Yeah, and Stacey if we start seeing midlife as a
season for transitioning, right?
The season of transitions, thenwe are in a position, an
advantageous position, havinghad some lived experience and
some saging through the aging uptill then, right?
(15:06):
To look back, to gather what wehave learned and earned from
that experience in thoseprevious seasons, to then start
seeing the richness of where weare in midlife so that we can
leverage that to propel to thenext level in terms of that
(15:27):
transition, right?
Because again, as you justsaid, midlife doesn't mean the
end.
It's about reflection, it'sabout restoration, it's not
resignation, it's really torestore and to revive and to
move forward to the next half,as we say.
Coach Stacy (15:49):
He's on a roll today.
Uh, you know, every seasoncarries purpose, and we want to
remind ourselves to embrace andtreasure this season that we're
in.
Coach Wayne (16:02):
Yeah.
Coach Stacy (16:03):
What?
Um, let's talk a little bitabout staying on the path to to
our dreams, to that next uhvision, that next aspiration.
Coach Wayne (16:16):
All right.
So, you know, dreams, Stacy, inmy mind, are there to give you
something to aspire to, tostretch, stretch us, to
challenge us, to keep us uhmoving, to energize us without
dreams, without a plan, withouta future, without foresight,
(16:40):
we're kind of in a stuck place,right?
You have nothing to live, livefor, as it were, and I I don't
want people to take thatliterally.
But when you're not aspiringfor something that stretches you
in the way of a dream and avision, then what else is there?
Coach Stacy (16:57):
Yeah, that's that's where the hope is, um, right?
That that those desires of ourheart, again, you know, the
scripture talks about uh Godgranting the desires of our
heart, of course, when they arein alignment with who he's
called us to be and thedestination, the destiny that he
(17:20):
has for us, um that hope iswhat keeps us going, right?
To your point, that's whatkeeps us motivated.
And while we're in thetrenches, sometime when those
financial setbacks or those lifesetbacks, those health
setbacks, when they uhinterrupt, they can tamp down
(17:42):
our dreams.
And so we want to be mindfulthat even though there is that
delay, or maybe that setback, ormaybe dreams are or aspirations
are resting, that there's stillopportunity to recommit to
those dreams and still takesmall steps on the path to move
(18:06):
in that direction, even if itdoesn't look like or feel like
what we thought.
Coach Wayne (18:13):
Yeah.
Stacey, those setbacks aretruly, when we reframe it,
feedback, right?
That's not failure, right?
That's just one feedback to saythis door is closed, let me try
another.
And to your point, you know,taking small steps.
We talked in a previous episodethis season about building
(18:34):
momentum and comes from smallsteps.
I like to celebrate wins,Stacey, and no matter how small
it is, it ought to becelebrated, and you can have a
big celebration for a relativelysmall win because what you want
to do is to prime the self.
Yes, yes, you know, chairyourself on, as you say, Stace,
(18:58):
so that you can really feel thatmomentum.
Because midlife is a placewhere a lot of people get stuck,
let's face it.
Coach Stacy (19:05):
Yeah, yeah.
Well, that's that's indeed umwhy I'm sure I know that's
indeed why I was called um intothe coaching life.
And it is because you know,I've been through my own
stuckness in midlife, really.
And uh a lot of that is nowthat's fuel, right?
(19:30):
Now that is energy.
Now that is life experiencethat we get to help others
through.
Um, and so moving forward isthe way and building that
momentum and not looking at itto your point as it has to be
the big leap.
(19:51):
It really is the small stepsand that celebration.
I'm sure that you as a coach,that's something that you talk
about with your clients often.
That is certainly somethingthat I talk about with my
clients and my colleaguesbecause it's so easy to look at
(20:12):
the accomplishment and notreally acknowledge it as an
accomplishment or a step and tojust think about what's next.
But that celebration, you'reright, is fuel.
It does prime the pump.
Coach Wayne (20:25):
Stacey, one thing I know, excuse me, for a fact,
that we as coaches help ourclients to get through is that
stinking thinking, thoselimiting beliefs around what
keeps you stuck and away fromthe path and away from the wins
that are already within you andyou may have already achieved.
(20:47):
There's sometimes this thoughtor these thoughts about midlife.
You know, we talked about it,not good enough, not old enough,
not educated enough, notexperienced enough.
Hey, we got so much tocelebrate, Stacey.
We just have to reframe the waywe think so that we can give
ourselves to fuel up.
Coach Stacy (21:08):
Yes, yes, yes.
And not defining ourselves bythat old story, right?
That old narrative of thatstinking thinking.
It really is time to movebeyond that that old blueprint
and into a new path.
Coach Wayne (21:22):
Yeah.
So, Stace, I uh, you know, weare talking a little bit about
how we see ourselves, theself-concept and self-image.
And I would say that it'ssometimes not clear for folks in
midlife to see themselves asready to launch again, as you
(21:47):
know, the the caterpillar to thecocoon to the butterfly.
Sometimes, if you're feelingstuck, just like the butterfly
in the cocoon stage, you'reenmeshed with all that stuff,
and you may feel like you'restuck, but you have to be able
the self-concept and image is toknow that freedom exists once
(22:09):
you get past that thinking,because there's a butterfly
waiting for you to take wings.
Coach Stacy (22:14):
That's the gift of having a coach.
I'm sure you have one, I havetwo.
Um, you know, that is the giftof having a coach.
It is someone to help you umthink beyond your current
cocoon, right?
To think beyond the limitationsand really ask you those
(22:38):
questions.
So let's just run through a fewquestions that our listener can
ask themselves um in in thisseason, really to think about
where they are.
What feels life-giving to youright now?
What's a desire that keepsresurfacing even if you try to
(23:03):
push it away?
You want to add to that, Wayne?
Coach Wayne (23:07):
I would say, what am I being invited to release
this season?
And who or what is lighting mynext step?
Coach Stacy (23:20):
Step.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, that that's good.
That's good.
Who's lighting my next step?
Woo! That's good, that's good.
I mean, we indeed invite uh ourlistener to stay connected to
Wayne or myself or and myself,um, because we are really here
(23:41):
to be of service and to help ourlistener, to help our clients
move beyond and continue ontheir path to their own
greatness.
We are all here with gifts anda purpose and a divine calling.
And so we want to help you livethat out.
Coach Wayne (24:05):
Hey, Tiger Woods had a coach, Serena had a coach,
right?
You name it, all the greats,all the greats have never done
it on their own, they haveinvested in coaching.
So why wouldn't you?
Coach Stacy (24:22):
Right, right.
It is that belief of investingum in yourself, and you know, we
wouldn't be talking or sayingthese things if it is not a
practice we didn't believe in.
Um, because we are always stillbecoming, and so it's okay to
(24:44):
want a little support in thatarea.
Doesn't mean you're not goodwhere you are, it just means
you're looking to be great whereyou're going.
Coach Wayne (24:52):
Yeah.
Stace, you wanna so we know wekind of went through some
takeaways.
Excuse me.
I wonder if it's time for us toshare with with you listening
in some what we call call toaction, some assignments, as it
were.
And you can hold yourselfaccountable, but we always
(25:13):
prefer if you find yourself areliable and relatable uh uh
accountability partner, someonethat can keep you in check,
right?
And if you can do the same forthem on some other front, that's
great.
They say iron sharpens iron.
Coach Stacy (25:30):
Yeah, right.
We're just all in the wordtoday.
Um, that is true, Wayne.
You know, really, this is thetime um to think less about the
pre-drawn map and more aboutcourageously walking a path that
(25:52):
you may not see the road ahead,the path ahead, but in your
trusting, in your faith, in yourknowledge, you are taking those
steps toward your dreams, youraspirations, what's next for you
in this season of midlife.
(26:14):
I love just from a key takeawaystandpoint, where we talked
about the seasons and thisharvest season can also be a
time of reflection.
So, you know, I think the thecall to action is really one um
of reflection, of looking at theharvest that you've currently
(26:39):
amassed and reflecting on howyou've gotten here and where you
desire to go.
And I would say um, Wayne, wewant to make sure that we share
in the show notes the umself-assessment that you have
because we want to providetools, practical tools,
(27:04):
actionable tools for you to beable to move forward um and be
empowered in this midlifeseason.
This is the time, y'all.
Wayne and I we celebratemidlife and we believe that this
is a season of richness.
And so our hope is that theself-assessment really gives you
(27:26):
just one opportunity to payattention to yourself, to do
that little self-check around amI expecting there to be a GPS
or a very clean map about howI'm gonna get from where I am to
where I want to go?
Or have I begun to embrace theconcept or or am I actually am I
(27:52):
walking on the path in a waythat I'm comfortable knowing
that I may not have all theanswers, I may not see the road
a mile ahead, but I'm going totake the step in a powerful way
to move toward my destiny.
Coach Wayne (28:12):
Amen.
Amen, Stacy.
Absolutely, folks.
Now listen, in addition to whatStacy has just added, when it
comes to action, and I know manyfolks are prayerful and they'll
be saying, Oh, I'm prayingabout the season and all that,
but there's something that youhave to add to make that prayer
really just activate it, so tospeak.
(28:34):
And one thing that you can dois to look at where you are in
the season, to Stacy's point,where are you now?
And uh what sort ofresourcefulness you can draw on.
What is based on your a dream,one dream, one goal, what is
your next best step in movingtowards that direction?
(28:58):
Now, it may not be the typicalpathway.
You may have to, if you can'tgo in, you may have to go around
or through.
But what is that step that youneed to take to get closer to
that dream, that path along theway in midlife?
(29:20):
And you can't do it alone.
So who might you call on thatcan help and support you in that
movement?
Coach Stacy (29:31):
Yeah, I would echo that and say, you know, yes, we
call on God, we call on ourCreator, and we remember that
our faith without the work iswhat the scripture calls dead,
(29:51):
right?
So we must couple our faithwith our action, our imperfect
action.
Our um intentional action thatmay not look or end up the way
we intended, but we must move.
(30:12):
We must move on the path,otherwise, we're just standing
still.
Wayne, you as a coach, I knowthat you are available.
Is there anything you'd like toshare with the people before we
end this episode?
Coach Wayne (30:28):
Yeah.
See, I'm wearing my Lake Kazgear today, Stacey, because my
plan is this season to do sometrades to make sure that that
team can look better.
But uh, but as a coach, uh, anexperienced life coach, I want
to just say to folks, takemidlife seriously, but also, but
(30:49):
also with a grain of salt.
In other words, you can humouryourself.
You don't have to take it soseriously that you are fretting
and in despair and stressed out.
Seriously, in that you justdon't resign, you reflect, you
get ready to restore, rebound.
And I would say just find someway this weekend of as you plan
(31:15):
for that goal we talked aboutand deciding on what season you
are, also make a little time onyour schedule for some
self-care.
Coach Stacy (31:25):
I like self-care, and I would add, make a little
time on your schedule for somefun.
In a future episode, we willtalk about reconnecting with
your childlike wonder.
We think so often we're sofixated on the path or the map,
and we forget that we are hereto live, we are here to live
(31:48):
this life, and part of that,yes, is taking care of yourself,
mind, body, and soul, and theother part is having some fun.
So I would say if you findyourself in a position where
you're not sure what the nextstep is, you're considering what
(32:09):
your aspirations are, or you'veeven lost touch with what your
dreams are or what's next foryou, and you're feeling a little
like, yeah, I get this conceptof the path and the map and the
destination, but I'm just notsure where I want to go.
I encourage you to get yourselfa good coach.
(32:31):
You can connect with CoachWayne, you have all his deeds.
He is indeed very active onsocial.
You know how to reach him aswell as it's always in the show
notes.
Same for me.
I'm looking to make myselfavailable.
You always know how to reachme, it's always in the show
(32:51):
notes.
Coach Wayne's assessment willbe in the show notes.
What would you like to say inparting, sir?
Coach Wayne (32:59):
Stacy, one of the things that I do selfishly when
I have these meetings with youis I get some free coaching from
you.
So I I come up in here with mystuff and you uh give it to me.
And I love it, Stacey, becauseit's free.
So I'm telling the folks.
Coach Stacy (33:15):
That's partnership.
That's partnership.
And my connecting, myconnecting coaching call is
complimentary as well.
So Wayne is not the only onethat gets the benefit of free
coaching that is available toour listener as well.
Coach Wayne (33:31):
Yeah.
States, we're out of time, butuh, not energy.
So we'll talk about that inanother episode, won't we?
Coach Stacy (33:39):
Sounds great, Wayne.
It is always a joy to sharethis space with you.
We thank our listener forjoining us and for leaving maybe
a note in the comments.
Always feel free to share yourthoughts.
Uh, and we'll see you the nexttime.
Thank you for joining us on theMidlife Revolution Unleashed.
Go next.
(33:59):
Thanks for tuning in to MidlifeRevolution Unleashed.
We're grateful you're part ofthis journey.
Coach Wayne (34:10):
If you love this episode, share it, subscribe,
and hit that notification bellso you don't miss another
episode.
Coach Stacy (34:17):
I'm Coach Stacy, and I'm cheering you on.
Coach Wayne (34:20):
And I'm Coach Wayne, and I'll see you at the
top.
What if your midlife isn't a map with your
turn by turn direction?
But a path you create as youwalk it step by step with light
enough, just enough to see thenext step ahead.
Let's talk about it.
Coach Wayne (00:40):
You found the midlife revolution unleashed,
the space to embrace yourwisdom, reignite your passions,
and move boldly into what'snext.
I am Coach Wayne, the VIPcoach.
Coach Stacy (00:53):
And I'm Coach Stacy M.
Lewis.
We're here with insights,stories, and strategies to fuel
your midlife journey.
So take a breath, lean in.
Your revolution starts now.
Hey, hey, hey! Hey, Miss Stacy,how are you?
(01:13):
Good day, Sir Wayne.
I am well.
How are you today?
Coach Wayne (01:18):
I'm chilling, chilling, getting ready for the
season, as you can see.
Though this is not my team, Ijust chose I like yellow.
Yeah.
Coach Stacy (01:27):
Okay, all right.
Uh I like a good yellow.
You know, some say color ofhealth and all of that.
Uh so you're looking good nomatter what, sir.
Coach Wayne (01:41):
Thank you, Miss Stace.
Thank you.
It's always a pleasure workingaside alongside you, Stacey,
Midlife Revolution Unleashed.
And uh today, you know, we'regonna bust it up.
Today we're gonna talk aboutmost of us have had a plan in
terms of a path that takes usthrough life's journey, and it's
(02:05):
usually kind of linear, youknow.
We do the high school thingbefore preschool and all that,
and then we get into college orvocational school, that sort of
thing, and then we start ourfamily and start a career, and
then we go through all of thosechallenges, and then we hit
midlife, and at midlife we'resupposed to be here and we're
(02:26):
supposed to be there, right?
And then we get into retirementand old age, and we're supposed
to be, but listen, life is notlinear, and along the path,
there are roadmaps anddeviations and some appointed
divine appointments.
And today, Stacy, we want to wewant to talk all about those.
Coach Stacy (02:50):
Absolutely.
Uh, you know, the thing aboutmidlife in particular is it has
a way of dismantling or breakingdown those linear pathways,
right?
Um, so our goal today is reallyto embrace and unpack that a
little bit and really talk aboutuh how in this season or these
(03:11):
seasons we can really navigate,uh, embrace and navigate the
seasons, the detours, and thosedivine appointments that you
referred to.
So let's jump on in.
Oh, one second, Sir Wayne.
Did you introduce yourself toour listener?
Coach Wayne (03:29):
Listen, Stace.
If they watch the movies, theysee me.
I'm the guy.
So I am Coach Wayne, the VIPcoach, and really my purpose is
to help brothers navigatemidlife so that their second
half can be their best half.
And Stacy, how and what do youdo?
Coach Stacy (03:50):
I am Stacy M.
Lewis.
It is always my joy to be herewith my co-host, Coach Wayne.
I'm a midlife women's coach, anonprofit executive, and a lover
of God and his people on mostdays.
And um certainly excited totalk to have this conversation
uh and welcome you again to theMidlife Revolution Unleashed.
(04:12):
Let's jump in, Sir Wayne, andtalk about um why the blueprint
breaks at this at this point ofthe game.
Coach Wayne (04:22):
Well, you know, the truth of the matter is at any
point the blueprint can breakbecause a lot of the dogmas that
we attach to how we should liveare not even set by us.
These guardrails and these uhdogmas are created in terms of
somebody else's plan for us.
And we don't talk aboutsomebody in the way of a divine
(04:44):
plan, we're talking aboutinstitutional plans.
Uh, you know, you gotta do Abefore B.
For example, Stacy, in myworld, there are lots of people
that I'm seeing that arecreating opportunities for
themselves and others throughentrepreneurship.
And guess what they didn't do?
They didn't go ahead and do thefour-year standard college
(05:07):
degree piece, which is part ofthe blueprint.
So it's truly cyclical, and uha lot of it is organic in terms
of how life will unfold.
Coach Stacy (05:19):
I I agree, and that the the changes that we
experience, right, as we've gonethrough different phases of
that blueprint, right?
Some of us have followed theblueprint uh letter by letter,
and others, you know, have havehad missteps or or changes or
(05:40):
evolutions in the blueprint.
And the reality is that as ourlife evolves and as we sage, as
you would say, uh some of thoseold maps, those old blueprints
become irrelevant.
They're they no longer fit orcreate uh the next step that we
(06:03):
should be taking.
They they just are no longer inalignment with who we are now
and where we desire to go.
Um, sometimes those blueprintswere old and they were based on
someone else's dreams oraspirations for us.
And now we're in a season thatwe can really determine what our
(06:25):
aspirations are and start tooutline a path on how we're
gonna take the steps to getthere.
Coach Wayne (06:33):
Yeah, and as you're listening to us, you probably
are saying, Hey, Wayne, Stacy,you're talking to me because
some of you, or you inparticular, listening right
here, you know that you had aplan for what you're gonna do
after five years, say, of thejob that you're with.
And then life dealt you somestuff, you know, hill illnesses,
(06:57):
a birth, a grandchild, whateverit is.
And the plan has to adapt, ithas to change, and you have to
be agile, flexible, and bewilling to change with it.
So that linear thinking, thatABC blueprint has to go right
out the door.
Coach Stacy (07:18):
Absolutely, right out the door.
And you know, I can't help butthink of the um scripture that
talks about how God's word is alamp unto our feet, right?
So it's shining light on ourfeet, and it is a light to our
path, not to our destination,but to our path, so that we can
(07:42):
take the next step.
And so uh a great question toask yourself is where are you
still holding on to outdated tothat outdated map of your life?
And what would it look like tolet go of that?
Coach Wayne (07:59):
Yeah, stay out speak for me.
I know a few years ago, mayberight after COVID, when I
decided to fire corporateAmerica, and I went back to the
beach, burnt all the ships onthe shore, and said, this is
entrepreneurism, one wayforward, no exits.
And that was a beautiful plan.
And as I'm as it's unfoldingand the economy is unfolding
(08:20):
today, I've had to adjust thatplan.
I'm in the process right now ofcreating additions to the Wayne
brand, the VIP brand, so I canadjust accordingly as the times
demand.
Coach Stacy (08:35):
Yeah, yeah, we have to evolve.
And that is the beauty of nothaving that GPS or that clearly
defined map, that we can reallytake those next steps in a way
that helps us walk the path asit's being revealed to us, um,
(08:56):
and helps us be nimble asopposed to so fixed on the path
that we believe we were supposedto take or that map, that GPS.
And you as you talked about, itour life is really about these
seasons, right?
To everything, there is aseason, a time under the sun.
(09:18):
And so these cycles that we umare going through and the ways
that we want to move forwardrequire a path, not a fixed map.
A path is required.
Coach Wayne (09:35):
Stace seasons are so important, right?
I uh oftentimes we arepremature in trying to reap in
the sowing season, trying to dothings in the wrong season and
not understanding why we are notyielding the results.
(09:59):
In other words, you're notgonna harvest during sowing
season, it just doesn't happen.
So you have to nurture, tillthe soil, uh fertilize, and
wait, and wait, and wait, yes,and wait, and a lot of us are
not able to do that, so thatrequires a sense of insight,
(10:19):
discipline, and Stacy, faith toknow.
Coach Stacy (10:22):
Absolutely.
I'm listening, I was listeningto you, you know, say, and wait,
and wait.
And again, you know, the Biblefor for both of us, I believe,
is that basic instruction beforeleaving earth.
And what you just talked aboutwas where it says seed time and
(10:45):
harvest, right?
You have you plant the seeds,you must give it time.
And in that time, there arethings that happen, right?
Sometimes there are financialsetbacks, sometimes there are
health setbacks that youmentioned.
Um, it doesn't mean that theharvest is not on the other end,
(11:05):
it just means that the path tothat harvest is different than
we originally envisioned orplanned.
So some good.
Coach Wayne (11:16):
Yeah, in business, I would say one of the things
that uh is applicable tobrothers as well as sisters.
When you are, when you have aplan, when you have a vision,
there's a trajectory.
And oftentimes we're stuck onthe idea that we have to elevate
by taking this position in thiscompany and then this position.
(11:38):
But I have found out thatthat's not always the best uh
source to get to where you want.
Sometimes you may have to leavethe company you're now in and
go to another company, it couldbe the competition, or sometimes
you have to, as they say, ifthere isn't a setting at the
table for you, you have to bringyour own chair and set your own
(12:01):
table.
Sometimes you may have to goout and and do something for
yourself to get the opportunityto create the vision from the
aspiration that you have heldfor yourself.
Coach Stacy (12:14):
Yeah, you know, I I just keep thinking about the
reality.
You talked aboutentrepreneurship and and and how
change uh you know is sometimeneeded.
And I think aboutentrepreneurship and the reality
that some of it doesn't looklike I envisioned, right?
(12:37):
I certainly believe God is muchsmarter than I, right?
Much more uh defined in theplan and creative in the plan.
And so the plan that I havedoesn't always manifest or look
the way I thought it would.
And that is being on the path,right?
(12:59):
That's not having the map.
I would, you know, create amap, which I'm sure would would
maybe not have me in the place Ireally think it would end up.
And so um I really think thatthis is an important time to
embrace this idea of or thisreminder that our life is on a
(13:22):
path, there's not a very clearmap.
And in this autumn season, youtalked about um the harvest, um,
but I also think that this thisseason can be one of
reflection.
And you and I talked about abit of a uh a coaching prompt
(13:44):
that looks seasonal, right?
That talks about what bestdescribes your current stage of
life, we'll say.
And winter might be more likerest or stripping down.
Spring is often referred to asnew beginnings, summer is
talking about fruitfulness, andthen in autumn we have harvest
(14:07):
and reflection.
So, what a great time to reallythink about where we desire to
go next, right?
It's not the end destination,uh, it is the next destination.
And what steps do we believe weneed to take or to be in
(14:32):
alignment, right, with our call,with our purpose, with our
divine appointment, as you said?
Um, what are those steps thatwe need to take that will help
us move down the path?
Coach Wayne (14:45):
Yeah, and Stacey if we start seeing midlife as a
season for transitioning, right?
The season of transitions, thenwe are in a position, an
advantageous position, havinghad some lived experience and
some saging through the aging uptill then, right?
(15:06):
To look back, to gather what wehave learned and earned from
that experience in thoseprevious seasons, to then start
seeing the richness of where weare in midlife so that we can
leverage that to propel to thenext level in terms of that
(15:27):
transition, right?
Because again, as you justsaid, midlife doesn't mean the
end.
It's about reflection, it'sabout restoration, it's not
resignation, it's really torestore and to revive and to
move forward to the next half,as we say.
Coach Stacy (15:49):
He's on a roll today.
Uh, you know, every seasoncarries purpose, and we want to
remind ourselves to embrace andtreasure this season that we're
in.
Coach Wayne (16:02):
Yeah.
Coach Stacy (16:03):
What?
Um, let's talk a little bitabout staying on the path to to
our dreams, to that next uhvision, that next aspiration.
Coach Wayne (16:16):
All right.
So, you know, dreams, Stacy, inmy mind, are there to give you
something to aspire to, tostretch, stretch us, to
challenge us, to keep us uhmoving, to energize us without
dreams, without a plan, withouta future, without foresight,
(16:40):
we're kind of in a stuck place,right?
You have nothing to live, livefor, as it were, and I I don't
want people to take thatliterally.
But when you're not aspiringfor something that stretches you
in the way of a dream and avision, then what else is there?
Coach Stacy (16:57):
Yeah, that's that's where the hope is, um, right?
That that those desires of ourheart, again, you know, the
scripture talks about uh Godgranting the desires of our
heart, of course, when they arein alignment with who he's
called us to be and thedestination, the destiny that he
(17:20):
has for us, um that hope iswhat keeps us going, right?
To your point, that's whatkeeps us motivated.
And while we're in thetrenches, sometime when those
financial setbacks or those lifesetbacks, those health
setbacks, when they uhinterrupt, they can tamp down
(17:42):
our dreams.
And so we want to be mindfulthat even though there is that
delay, or maybe that setback, ormaybe dreams are or aspirations
are resting, that there's stillopportunity to recommit to
those dreams and still takesmall steps on the path to move
(18:06):
in that direction, even if itdoesn't look like or feel like
what we thought.
Coach Wayne (18:13):
Yeah.
Stacey, those setbacks aretruly, when we reframe it,
feedback, right?
That's not failure, right?
That's just one feedback to saythis door is closed, let me try
another.
And to your point, you know,taking small steps.
We talked in a previous episodethis season about building
(18:34):
momentum and comes from smallsteps.
I like to celebrate wins,Stacey, and no matter how small
it is, it ought to becelebrated, and you can have a
big celebration for a relativelysmall win because what you want
to do is to prime the self.
Yes, yes, you know, chairyourself on, as you say, Stace,
(18:58):
so that you can really feel thatmomentum.
Because midlife is a placewhere a lot of people get stuck,
let's face it.
Coach Stacy (19:05):
Yeah, yeah.
Well, that's that's indeed umwhy I'm sure I know that's
indeed why I was called um intothe coaching life.
And it is because you know,I've been through my own
stuckness in midlife, really.
And uh a lot of that is nowthat's fuel, right?
(19:30):
Now that is energy.
Now that is life experiencethat we get to help others
through.
Um, and so moving forward isthe way and building that
momentum and not looking at itto your point as it has to be
the big leap.
(19:51):
It really is the small stepsand that celebration.
I'm sure that you as a coach,that's something that you talk
about with your clients often.
That is certainly somethingthat I talk about with my
clients and my colleaguesbecause it's so easy to look at
(20:12):
the accomplishment and notreally acknowledge it as an
accomplishment or a step and tojust think about what's next.
But that celebration, you'reright, is fuel.
It does prime the pump.
Coach Wayne (20:25):
Stacey, one thing I know, excuse me, for a fact,
that we as coaches help ourclients to get through is that
stinking thinking, thoselimiting beliefs around what
keeps you stuck and away fromthe path and away from the wins
that are already within you andyou may have already achieved.
(20:47):
There's sometimes this thoughtor these thoughts about midlife.
You know, we talked about it,not good enough, not old enough,
not educated enough, notexperienced enough.
Hey, we got so much tocelebrate, Stacey.
We just have to reframe the waywe think so that we can give
ourselves to fuel up.
Coach Stacy (21:08):
Yes, yes, yes.
And not defining ourselves bythat old story, right?
That old narrative of thatstinking thinking.
It really is time to movebeyond that that old blueprint
and into a new path.
Coach Wayne (21:22):
Yeah.
So, Stace, I uh, you know, weare talking a little bit about
how we see ourselves, theself-concept and self-image.
And I would say that it'ssometimes not clear for folks in
midlife to see themselves asready to launch again, as you
(21:47):
know, the the caterpillar to thecocoon to the butterfly.
Sometimes, if you're feelingstuck, just like the butterfly
in the cocoon stage, you'reenmeshed with all that stuff,
and you may feel like you'restuck, but you have to be able
the self-concept and image is toknow that freedom exists once
(22:09):
you get past that thinking,because there's a butterfly
waiting for you to take wings.
Coach Stacy (22:14):
That's the gift of having a coach.
I'm sure you have one, I havetwo.
Um, you know, that is the giftof having a coach.
It is someone to help you umthink beyond your current
cocoon, right?
To think beyond the limitationsand really ask you those
(22:38):
questions.
So let's just run through a fewquestions that our listener can
ask themselves um in in thisseason, really to think about
where they are.
What feels life-giving to youright now?
What's a desire that keepsresurfacing even if you try to
(23:03):
push it away?
You want to add to that, Wayne?
Coach Wayne (23:07):
I would say, what am I being invited to release
this season?
And who or what is lighting mynext step?
Coach Stacy (23:20):
Step.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, that that's good.
That's good.
Who's lighting my next step?
Woo! That's good, that's good.
I mean, we indeed invite uh ourlistener to stay connected to
Wayne or myself or and myself,um, because we are really here
(23:41):
to be of service and to help ourlistener, to help our clients
move beyond and continue ontheir path to their own
greatness.
We are all here with gifts anda purpose and a divine calling.
And so we want to help you livethat out.
Coach Wayne (24:05):
Hey, Tiger Woods had a coach, Serena had a coach,
right?
You name it, all the greats,all the greats have never done
it on their own, they haveinvested in coaching.
So why wouldn't you?
Coach Stacy (24:22):
Right, right.
It is that belief of investingum in yourself, and you know, we
wouldn't be talking or sayingthese things if it is not a
practice we didn't believe in.
Um, because we are always stillbecoming, and so it's okay to
(24:44):
want a little support in thatarea.
Doesn't mean you're not goodwhere you are, it just means
you're looking to be great whereyou're going.
Coach Wayne (24:52):
Yeah.
Stace, you wanna so we know wekind of went through some
takeaways.
Excuse me.
I wonder if it's time for us toshare with with you listening
in some what we call call toaction, some assignments, as it
were.
And you can hold yourselfaccountable, but we always
(25:13):
prefer if you find yourself areliable and relatable uh uh
accountability partner, someonethat can keep you in check,
right?
And if you can do the same forthem on some other front, that's
great.
They say iron sharpens iron.
Coach Stacy (25:30):
Yeah, right.
We're just all in the wordtoday.
Um, that is true, Wayne.
You know, really, this is thetime um to think less about the
pre-drawn map and more aboutcourageously walking a path that
(25:52):
you may not see the road ahead,the path ahead, but in your
trusting, in your faith, in yourknowledge, you are taking those
steps toward your dreams, youraspirations, what's next for you
in this season of midlife.
(26:14):
I love just from a key takeawaystandpoint, where we talked
about the seasons and thisharvest season can also be a
time of reflection.
So, you know, I think the thecall to action is really one um
of reflection, of looking at theharvest that you've currently
(26:39):
amassed and reflecting on howyou've gotten here and where you
desire to go.
And I would say um, Wayne, wewant to make sure that we share
in the show notes the umself-assessment that you have
because we want to providetools, practical tools,
(27:04):
actionable tools for you to beable to move forward um and be
empowered in this midlifeseason.
This is the time, y'all.
Wayne and I we celebratemidlife and we believe that this
is a season of richness.
And so our hope is that theself-assessment really gives you
(27:26):
just one opportunity to payattention to yourself, to do
that little self-check around amI expecting there to be a GPS
or a very clean map about howI'm gonna get from where I am to
where I want to go?
Or have I begun to embrace theconcept or or am I actually am I
(27:52):
walking on the path in a waythat I'm comfortable knowing
that I may not have all theanswers, I may not see the road
a mile ahead, but I'm going totake the step in a powerful way
to move toward my destiny.
Coach Wayne (28:12):
Amen.
Amen, Stacy.
Absolutely, folks.
Now listen, in addition to whatStacy has just added, when it
comes to action, and I know manyfolks are prayerful and they'll
be saying, Oh, I'm prayingabout the season and all that,
but there's something that youhave to add to make that prayer
really just activate it, so tospeak.
(28:34):
And one thing that you can dois to look at where you are in
the season, to Stacy's point,where are you now?
And uh what sort ofresourcefulness you can draw on.
What is based on your a dream,one dream, one goal, what is
your next best step in movingtowards that direction?
(28:58):
Now, it may not be the typicalpathway.
You may have to, if you can'tgo in, you may have to go around
or through.
But what is that step that youneed to take to get closer to
that dream, that path along theway in midlife?
(29:20):
And you can't do it alone.
So who might you call on thatcan help and support you in that
movement?
Coach Stacy (29:31):
Yeah, I would echo that and say, you know, yes, we
call on God, we call on ourCreator, and we remember that
our faith without the work iswhat the scripture calls dead,
(29:51):
right?
So we must couple our faithwith our action, our imperfect
action.
Our um intentional action thatmay not look or end up the way
we intended, but we must move.
(30:12):
We must move on the path,otherwise, we're just standing
still.
Wayne, you as a coach, I knowthat you are available.
Is there anything you'd like toshare with the people before we
end this episode?
Coach Wayne (30:28):
Yeah.
See, I'm wearing my Lake Kazgear today, Stacey, because my
plan is this season to do sometrades to make sure that that
team can look better.
But uh, but as a coach, uh, anexperienced life coach, I want
to just say to folks, takemidlife seriously, but also, but
(30:49):
also with a grain of salt.
In other words, you can humouryourself.
You don't have to take it soseriously that you are fretting
and in despair and stressed out.
Seriously, in that you justdon't resign, you reflect, you
get ready to restore, rebound.
And I would say just find someway this weekend of as you plan
(31:15):
for that goal we talked aboutand deciding on what season you
are, also make a little time onyour schedule for some
self-care.
Coach Stacy (31:25):
I like self-care, and I would add, make a little
time on your schedule for somefun.
In a future episode, we willtalk about reconnecting with
your childlike wonder.
We think so often we're sofixated on the path or the map,
and we forget that we are hereto live, we are here to live
(31:48):
this life, and part of that,yes, is taking care of yourself,
mind, body, and soul, and theother part is having some fun.
So I would say if you findyourself in a position where
you're not sure what the nextstep is, you're considering what
(32:09):
your aspirations are, or you'veeven lost touch with what your
dreams are or what's next foryou, and you're feeling a little
like, yeah, I get this conceptof the path and the map and the
destination, but I'm just notsure where I want to go.
I encourage you to get yourselfa good coach.
(32:31):
You can connect with CoachWayne, you have all his deeds.
He is indeed very active onsocial.
You know how to reach him aswell as it's always in the show
notes.
Same for me.
I'm looking to make myselfavailable.
You always know how to reachme, it's always in the show
(32:51):
notes.
Coach Wayne's assessment willbe in the show notes.
What would you like to say inparting, sir?
Coach Wayne (32:59):
Stacy, one of the things that I do selfishly when
I have these meetings with youis I get some free coaching from
you.
So I I come up in here with mystuff and you uh give it to me.
And I love it, Stacey, becauseit's free.
So I'm telling the folks.
Coach Stacy (33:15):
That's partnership.
That's partnership.
And my connecting, myconnecting coaching call is
complimentary as well.
So Wayne is not the only onethat gets the benefit of free
coaching that is available toour listener as well.
Coach Wayne (33:31):
Yeah.
States, we're out of time, butuh, not energy.
So we'll talk about that inanother episode, won't we?
Coach Stacy (33:39):
Sounds great, Wayne.
It is always a joy to sharethis space with you.
We thank our listener forjoining us and for leaving maybe
a note in the comments.
Always feel free to share yourthoughts.
Uh, and we'll see you the nexttime.
Thank you for joining us on theMidlife Revolution Unleashed.
Go next.
(33:59):
Thanks for tuning in to MidlifeRevolution Unleashed.
We're grateful you're part ofthis journey.
Coach Wayne (34:10):
If you love this episode, share it, subscribe,
and hit that notification bellso you don't miss another
episode.
Coach Stacy (34:17):
I'm Coach Stacy, and I'm cheering you on.
Coach Wayne (34:20):
And I'm Coach Wayne, and I'll see you at the
top.
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Ding dong! Join your culture consultants, Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang, on an unforgettable journey into the beating heart of CULTURE. Alongside sizzling special guests, they GET INTO the hottest pop-culture moments of the day and the formative cultural experiences that turned them into Culturistas. Produced by the Big Money Players Network and iHeartRadio.
Crime Junkie
Does hearing about a true crime case always leave you scouring the internet for the truth behind the story? Dive into your next mystery with Crime Junkie. Every Monday, join your host Ashley Flowers as she unravels all the details of infamous and underreported true crime cases with her best friend Brit Prawat. From cold cases to missing persons and heroes in our community who seek justice, Crime Junkie is your destination for theories and stories you won’t hear anywhere else. Whether you're a seasoned true crime enthusiast or new to the genre, you'll find yourself on the edge of your seat awaiting a new episode every Monday. If you can never get enough true crime... Congratulations, you’ve found your people. Follow to join a community of Crime Junkies! Crime Junkie is presented by audiochuck Media Company.
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.