May 23, 2025 • 34 mins
Rest isn't just about sleep—it's a vital component of thriving in midlife. We explore the seven types of rest essential for your well-being and productivity, especially for our midlife community of color.
Drawing from Dr. Sandra Dalton-Smith's framework, we explore seven distinct types of rest that most people overlook.
• Physical rest includes both passive (doing nothing) and active rest (gentle stretching, massage)
• Creative rest involves appreciating beauty and engaging in play to inspire and rejuvenate
• Social rest means stepping away from draining interactions and limiting social media
• Sensory rest requires reducing input from screens and environmental noise
• Mental rest helps combat decision fatigue that comes from making thousands of decisions daily
• Emotional rest gives permission to acknowledge feelings without judgment or fixing
• Spiritual rest connects us to something larger than ourselves, whether through faith or community
Take a moment to consider: What scares you about stopping? Who are you apart from what you do or provide? Are you performing rest or actually living it?
Join the Midlife Revolution Unleashed by subscribing to our podcast and connecting with us on social media. Your journey to reclaiming the power of rest—and through it, your best midlife—starts here!
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Wayne Dawson (00:06):
you've just stepped into the midlife
revolution, unleashed your spaceto ignite possibility, redefine
purpose and embrace the powerthat comes with age and
experience, co-hosted by yourstruly coach and I'm coach stacy
m lewis.
Stacy M. Lewis (00:22):
We are two season coaches focused on the
midlife community of color.
This isn't just a podcast.
It's a movement in a world thatsometimes forgets the power and
the wisdom that comes with age.
We are here to ignite arevolution and rewrite the
narrative of this incrediblejourney narrative of this
(00:46):
incredible journey.
Wayne Dawson (00:47):
So, whether you're navigating your career, growing
your business, rediscoveringpassions or challenging the
status quo, this is your space.
So buckle up, let's dive intothe Midlife Revolution Unleashed
.
Hello, and we are here.
Welcome to another episode ofMidlife Revolution Unleashed.
(01:12):
I am Coach Wayne, the VIP coach, and I help brothers to move
across the threshold of midlifeland on their feet in the second
half, so it's their best half.
With me today is none otherthan the great Coach Stacy M
Lewis.
Stacy, how are you today?
Stacy M. Lewis (01:34):
I am fine and fantastic, coach Wayne.
It is always a pleasure tospend this time with you as I
try to get my lighting right.
Welcome everyone to the MidlifeRevolution Unleashed.
I am indeed your co-host, coachStacy M Lewis.
I'm a nonprofit executive, acoach to midlife women, a lover
(01:57):
of God and his people on mostdays, and I am always so excited
to share this platform to talkabout the richness of midlife
with my dear friend and co-host,coach Wayne.
Wayne Dawson (02:11):
Stacy, we are in the process of bantering on to
the next level and our life isjust filled with the next step,
the next thing.
And today we want to pause fora cause and talk about rest.
We want to help our friendslistening in to recognize the
(02:36):
importance of that four letterword, r-e-s-t, which is just as
important, if not more so, thanthe grind that we go through day
and day for success.
Stacy M. Lewis (02:50):
I could not agree with you more, and the
thought that just occurred to me, or I guess the thought I was
reminded of, is the reality thatGod, the creator of heaven and
earth, set the example for restright.
(03:10):
It talks about what happened onthe first day and on the second
day and on the third day, andthen the fourth, fifth and sixth
day, when God filled right Allthe things that he created with
on that first, second and thirdday.
On the seventh day, whathappened, Wayne?
(03:31):
What happened on the seventhday?
Wayne Dawson (03:33):
There was a pause for cause, just rest.
Stacy M. Lewis (03:38):
Not because we believe the creator needed the
rest, but was setting theexample for us to rest.
We have some successes.
It's a really stressful timeout there right now and we are
here to remind you, in thisseason of resilience, in this
(03:59):
season of wisdom, to remember torest.
There's a lot of talk about thehustle and grind, but we need
to rest to find power in thepause, so let's dive in.
Wayne Dawson (04:14):
Wayne, let's dive in.
So the one rest that most of usare accustomed to and aware of
is that physical rest where wetake a break.
Many of us do that the one waywe know how, which is through
sleep and there are many otheravenues and modalities of
(04:39):
physical rest, but we areaccustomed to sleep and even
that Stacy, there is a scienceto getting the maximum amount or
optimizing your sleep, thephysical rest.
It's important and I'll saythis that I know that there are
many folks who struggle withweight loss and weight
(05:02):
management per se, and one ofthe things that your trainer or
doctor, or whomever it is that'ssupervising, will let you know
is there is a balance and arelationship between your
gaining weight and the amount ofrest that you're getting.
Stacy M. Lewis (05:21):
Yes, I think you're right in that the
physical rest is the one that wetalk about.
The physical rest is extremelyimportant and as Wayne and I
were talking about this episode,we really began to look at Dr
(05:43):
Sondra Dalton- Smith's seventypes of rest.
So this is going to be a reallyrobust conversation because
getting that you know, put yourhead on the pillow, rest truly
important.
But there are so manyopportunities for us to rest not
just our body, our mind, ouremotions, et cetera.
(06:06):
So let's keep going, Wayne.
Yeah.
Wayne Dawson (06:10):
Yeah, Stacy, I was looking at some of the notes
that came up here.
And one of the things that youtalked about on the seventh day,
but we know that winter we talkabout.
There's a season for all thingsand, in terms of mother nature,
(06:31):
when you look out, if you arefrom that part of the country
where you experienced winter, itis indeed a time of rest as
well, isn't it?
Stacy M. Lewis (06:42):
At least in nature it is.
I don't know when it's cold outthere.
It's a little challenging toget that physical rest at least.
But you are absolutely right.
And good evening, Curtis.
It is always good to have youin the room.
So, Wayne, let's start to diveinto these seven types of rest
(07:05):
and really encourage ourlistener around easy
opportunities to engage in them,and prayerfully, technology
will be on our side.
There we go.
Where would you like to start?
You talked about physical rest.
Wayne Dawson (07:24):
Yeah, let's talk a little bit more about that
physical rest.
Stacy M. Lewis (07:27):
Stacy for me.
Wayne Dawson (07:28):
So, as a person who likes to go to the gym and
get my workout in, even duringthat period, for your body to
respond in terms of growth andstrength, you beat it up on your
workout days.
There has to be rest daysbetween, and there are two types
(07:49):
of rest days.
For the physical, there'spassive rest and there's active
rest.
Active rest is when you simplyjust do nothing, you just you go
into your winter, so to speak.
Vig, okay.
Passive rest, yes.
Passive rest is where you arenot necessarily forcing the body
but you're doing stretching,for example, and gentle massage
(08:14):
and that sort of stuff on theoff day, but you're still
resting and recuperating andrestoring.
Stacy M. Lewis (08:22):
It is important for you to be your best self,
that you make sure that youincorporate both in your routine
so what you just said, it wasreally around that the physical
rest, the physical aspect ofrest is not just about that
putting your head on the pillowbut it is, as you're saying.
(08:45):
The physical aspect of restcould be disconnecting from
everything else and getting thatwalk, but the physical aspect
of rest can also be and ifyou're working out, really
setting aside that time for yourbody to rest and restore, so
really taking the breaks.
(09:06):
I love that breakdown.
And good evening, delaine.
Always a pleasure to see her.
Wayne Dawson (09:12):
Good evening Delaine and brother Curtis, who
I owe a call.
Stacy M. Lewis (09:19):
I'm not in that.
Let's keep going and talkingabout rest.
Wayne Dawson (09:24):
Yes, Stacy, you want us to go clockwise or
counterclockwise on this?
I?
Stacy M. Lewis (09:28):
think we go where we want to go and I'm
happy to take what's next.
How about that?
I think one of the things thatI enjoy the most is creative
rest.
I think one of the things thatI enjoy the most is creative
rest, and I think we're allsomewhat naturally creative at
heart.
But that real opportunity tojust appreciate creativity, to
(09:55):
play, to enjoy the beauty, thegifts that are around you Uh,
that's what Dr Dalton talksabout as creative rest.
How does that resonate for you,Wayne?
I?
Wayne Dawson (10:11):
like it and it really works for me because I uh
, I like gardening inherited itfrom my mother's genes, I think.
Stacy M. Lewis (10:20):
My sisters.
Wayne Dawson (10:20):
They like gardening.
Delaine, vivian and I lovegardening and walking up to my
house, my neighbor also has agreen thumb and so she plants up
, and so do I, and we decorate,and it's spring, so we're
blooming.
Now come around the corner.
That mindset of a hectic day issort of relieved for me as I
(10:48):
see the beauty, the creativerest that comes on me, that
dawns on me, as I see thisbeautiful flower garden or these
gardens, and so you know, someof us can have that done too in
(11:09):
the way of just taking time outto play a puzzle during your
busy schedule to untangle themind that has been caught up in
productive activity throughoutthe day.
Stacy M. Lewis (11:23):
I love it.
I love it, and so it is thatconnecting right.
The creative rest is part ofthat.
Connecting with things thatinspire you, that you find
beautiful, that, where you'reable to create, is what, to me,
you were talking about as youare gardening, as well as when
(11:46):
you're able to step back andappreciate what has been created
or what is blooming and toreally acknowledge that right.
It doesn't have to be a bigcelebration, but acknowledging
that beauty in silence iscreative rest love it social
(12:09):
rest.
Wayne Dawson (12:10):
how?
How could we leave this out?
Because when we talk aboutsocial rest, we're talking about
not just getting away from thenoisy neighbors, but we're
talking about social rest in theway of the interactions that we
have, many of whom, many of thepeople that I know, are caught
(12:31):
up with this and don't take abreak.
You know, you may think you'regetting a break because you're
holding this computer in yourhand.
We call a telephone, but ifyou're on it, scrolling 24-7 and
getting engaged in social media, you're not giving yourself the
due and needed social rest, andthat's very important.
Stacy M. Lewis (12:55):
Yeah, what I think is interesting about the
concept of social rest I thinkit's interesting about the
concept of social rest, right isthat it was likely developed.
This is my imagination, I couldbe totally wrong here because I
don't know the dates, but mythought is that it was likely
developed really before the rampup of social media, media.
(13:28):
And so, yes, there's the waythat social rest and sensory
rest work together, right.
So the social media is reallyimpacting, right, the sensory
experience, to your point, thelooking at the screens, the
hearing, the videos or theringings, the devices and when I
think about the social restit's also being focused on that
(13:57):
are fueling or energizing andresting from relationships or
social environments that aredraining or toxic.
So listening to you really forme, draws a closer relationship
(14:19):
between social rest and sensoryrest.
Wayne Dawson (14:23):
You know the older I've gotten the less tolerant I
am.
Of bedlam you know crazy, noisypeople and places and things.
And so I really even hearingthings in the kitchen drop pots
and pans being moved up and downkind of gets on my nerves and
(14:44):
gets me on edge.
So for me, social rest is veryimportant.
As I've gotten older I findthat I have much less tolerance
for the humbug of, you know, bigcrowds.
I got to pull away from that.
I never was one who enjoyed it.
To be honest, if I didn't getaccess backstage or through
(15:08):
access upfront, it was difficultfor me to join lines and that
sort of thing.
But we need that social restStacy.
Oftentimes our nerves are onend because of so much
bombardment.
And to your point, back to thesensory rest.
You know, when you are aroundfolks, especially outside of
(15:31):
your locus of control, you can'tcontrol them socially.
It means that there is more, Iguess, infiltration on your
space sensorily.
Stacy M. Lewis (15:44):
Absolutely, absolutely, which means that
it's also connected.
Right, so clearly they all worktogether.
Right?
We have this beautiful circulardiagram.
Listening to you talk about thepots and pans and the crowds.
Touches on the social, on thesensory and on the emotional
(16:10):
rest.
That importance of reallygiving ourselves permission to
feel right, to acknowledge thefeels right, as they say, to
acknowledge that, you know, whenI hear these certain sounds, it
really resonates in me in a notso good way.
(16:33):
But that permission to say thisis how I'm feeling, without
judging it, without fixing it,but acknowledging it, is a form
of emotional rest, like, okay,I'm not going to beat myself up
because I didn't X, y and Z, I'mgoing to say this is what
(16:55):
happened, I gave it my best, Iappreciate me, this is what
happened, I gave it my best, Iappreciate me and I acknowledge
how I feel about it and not letit overtake me or be consumed in
me, trying to fix it or judgeit.
Wayne Dawson (17:12):
Yeah, stace, have we totally turned the page on
the sensory rest piece, or can I?
Stacy M. Lewis (17:19):
add one more piece on that.
Oh, go right ahead.
Blue screens.
Wayne Dawson (17:21):
Sensory rest piece .
Or can I add one more piece onthat?
Oh, go right ahead.
Blue screens, sensory rest.
A lot of folks retire for thenight, including moi, and we
take with us the blue screen,the TV, or we take with us the
computer, with us the computer.
(17:45):
It is said that, in terms ofthe brain waves, that helps you
with restoration and the periodin the what's known as a
circadian rhythm.
Uh, the body goes through itsphases of sleep cycle and rest,
um, and there is a supposedly anoptimal period, and that's
usually, they say, between 10and 2, where you're getting the
most regenerative rest.
During that period thebrainwaves slow down to alpha
(18:09):
and theta waves and then, whendeep sleep, it's delta, but
there is beta waves, whichhappens while you are alive and
well and visibly doing things.
Blue screens keep your betalevels high, which means that
you're not in the rest zone,sensorily watching TV or
(18:30):
watching your handheld computer,the telephone, whatever.
Within two hours of going tosleep, they suggest you unplug
from all of that, all yourdevices, and so they have done
enough tests to recognize thatthis is in fact real and a
(18:50):
problem in our society today.
Stacy M. Lewis (18:54):
I don't believe that any of us are shocked by
that.
I certainly appreciate youbringing in the science behind
the disconnect from all of thesethings before you try to lay
your head down and restpeacefully.
So thank you for adding thatvery valuable nugget, Coach
(19:18):
Wayne.
Wayne Dawson (19:20):
Stacy mental rest.
You want to take that one on.
Stacy M. Lewis (19:24):
Absolutely.
I think that we can all easilyconnect with or understand
mental rest.
It is when we are allowing ourmind, our thoughts, to take a
break.
Many people refer to it asmindfulness.
We are often talking aboutmindfulness, but it really is
(19:48):
the freeing the mind from theconstant decision-making, the
fatigue from decision-making.
I don't know, Wayne, if you sawthe post today on LinkedIn
where the young lady I believeit was Charmaine talked about
the number of decisions that wemake every day and the range she
(20:11):
presented, which wasevidence-based, was from 6,000
to like 70,000, right, so a hugenumber in there, and imagine
the mental, the emotional, thatall of that energy being spent
and the need for our minds torest in order to refuel.
(20:38):
So I love the idea of mentalrest, in particular, when it
comes to decision fatigue.
Wayne Dawson (20:47):
Yeah, Let me touch on the fellas for a minute.
The boys boy talk.
Stacy M. Lewis (20:53):
Go right ahead.
Wayne Dawson (20:54):
You know one of the things that is happening
right across the country men ofcolor are imploding in many ways
because they're not getting themental and we'll talk a little
bit too about that emotionalpiece the rest, we are burnt out
.
But because we believe that wehave to show up as tough, hard,
(21:20):
managing it all, not asking forhelp we are not able to diffuse
the stressors that we aredealing with mentally right,
just getting up and going into aworld where you're not
recognized as a full man.
that alone is stressful, andbecause we're not asking for
(21:42):
help, because we don't take timeout we're too busy grinding, we
don't take a pause, as ourtitle suggests, today we
eventually implode.
It shows up in hypertension.
It shows up in weight gain aswell yes, for men too.
It shows up as heart failure,among some other things.
(22:06):
It shows up as aggression andviolence, and and and addictions
.
So it's very important that wepay attention to this mental
rest attention to this mentalrest.
Stacy M. Lewis (22:26):
Yeah, I agree with you, and while I believe
that many of our listeners thathappen to be women, midlife
women, can relate to what it isyou just shared about men I mean
and experientially relate, oneof the challenges for women is
the mental and emotionalexhaustion from holding so much
(22:53):
in, from looking to manage,support many others' emotional
needs, many others' social needsand really, you know,
performing at work, performingin business, so many decisions
(23:15):
and such high levels ofexhaustion we're holding in.
That you know, while we may notand we certainly are not here to
be scientists, so I'm not surethe data that talks about, you
know the correlation, say,between holding it all in and
(23:37):
addiction or holding it all in,and you know stress levels, but
what we do know is that thosestress levels and that holding
it all in does increase cortisol, which is known to proven to
data research says increasesweight gain, and so when you
(24:03):
think about that holding it allin and the number of us and I
say us as myself, as a midlifewoman and someone that struggles
with managing these pounds thatjust don't seem to want to go
away, I need to, I'm remindedand I appreciate this episode
(24:24):
because I'm reminded to look atwhat I might be holding in, look
at opportunities for mentalrest, for emotional rest, and
engage that in ways that help mefeel better.
Wayne Dawson (24:42):
Yeah, and the word is seek support.
There's no shame in the game.
You know talking to the fellasespecially and I'm sure across
the board to our femalecounterpart, when you're dealing
with enough too much a lot, youcan ask for help.
(25:07):
It's okay.
It doesn't make you less of ahuman being or an adult or a
responsible person.
You can ask for help.
Stacy M. Lewis (25:16):
I agree with you 2000%.
I agree with you 2000%.
And the one rest aspect that wedid not talk about is that
spiritual rest.
And what we mean when we sayspiritual rest, it really is in
that opportunity to connect withyour creator and say like this
(25:39):
is what's going on right thescripture talks about.
He's saying my burdens are likegive it to me, I'll take it,
cast all your cares on me.
And so again, a great selfreminder that I don't have to
hold it all.
To your point, Wayne, we don'thave to hold it all, we are not
(26:03):
meant to hold it all.
And what opportunities do wehave to really engage in
spiritual rest?
And it doesn't only have to beprayer, it can be talking with
someone right that shares kindof that spiritual connection
really, or doing things thatconnect you with your purpose.
(26:27):
That is spiritual rest and acritical part, I believe, of us
being able to move forward.
Wayne Dawson (26:35):
Yeah, Spiritual rest is going beyond self, right
, it's connecting to somethingmore whole and full than you.
So thus we talk about God, butso too is community, and
community that share in alike-mindedness also offers us a
(27:01):
sounding board, a place to findour spiritual, as it were,
connection.
So you know, at a time likethis, especially at a time like
this, where there is so muchdivision and issues around sense
of belonging, one truly needsthat time to set aside for
(27:24):
community rest, spiritual rest.
And again, Stacy to your point,we're not talking about toxic
communities, right?
We're talking about supportivecommunities that resonate with
the wholeness which is beyondourself.
Stacy M. Lewis (27:40):
There are multiple opportunities right
throughout every day for each ofus to connect with each of
these seven types of rest.
We talked about physical rest,mental rest, emotional rest,
social rest, sensory rest,creative rest and spiritual rest
(28:05):
.
We want to remind ourselves andour listeners that rest is not
a weakness.
It is an important part of lifeand thriving, and, as we shared
earlier that we've got a greatdemonstration of the position,
(28:33):
the priority of rest, rest andso our hope is that this episode
is indeed doing just thatreminding us all that rest is
important.
The grind is the grind, but wedon't have to live in the grind.
Wayne Dawson (28:50):
My other brother, paul Newell, is on the line, and
Paul, thank you for jumpingthrough my brother.
We got to do something togetherthis Thursday, so so I gotta
give you a call, or call, oh boyI'm just saying coach Wayne is
using tonight's episode as hisreconnect with the brother tribe
episode as well.
Stacy M. Lewis (29:12):
Okay, paul, y'all, y'all have figured out
trust and believe you know.
Wayne, I saw in our notes thisquote by Jim Lehrer, and it says
energy, not, it is that restthat is going to allow us to
(29:42):
renew the energy so that we canreally perform at our peak.
It's not about hustling grind,it really is about being smart
and utilizing the resources ofenergy and time, and so I really
(30:02):
like that quote.
And we talked about currencylast episode, so for those of
you didn't check it out, feelfree to go to Midlife Revolution
Unleashed on your favoritepodcast player and catch that
episode as well.
Wayne Dawson (30:17):
And catch that episode as well.
What you got to say, it's thebottom of the hour we got to get
out of here.
You know, just turn the lightsout and close the door behind
you.
Stacy M. Lewis (30:28):
It's not, it's not.
It is not that, hey, golly,turn off the lights and close
the door.
The music has stopped, theturntables are shutting down.
What we want to remind ouraudience, right is, here are a
couple of questions, so to speak, to think about as you consider
(30:49):
what we talked about tonight.
What scares you about stopping,about pausing, about resting?
Maybe you don't have a problemwith rest and so you're like, oh
no, this is good, good reminderto continue my rest patterns.
(31:10):
Who are you, apart from whatyou do or what you provide?
So often, what we do and whatwe provide is so entrenched into
who we believe we are.
That that's what causes us tokeep going on that hustle and
grind.
And are you performing rest oractually living it?
Wayne Dawson (31:34):
Yeah, stace, sir, there's a time for everything,
as we said In the season, andfor sure If we remind ourselves
that when things are slow Forfolks who are In the grind
Making that cheese, that dinero,if things are slow, we have to
(31:58):
recognize that, even In theuniverse of multiplication and
making of money, there is aseason of rest, and so, if we
start reframing what that means,it's perhaps a time to sit back
and to selectively see where weare sowing our seeds before
(32:20):
reaping season.
So don't always see slowness andrest as death or destruction.
Oftentimes it can be seen asthe launch pin to production and
abundance.
Stacy M. Lewis (32:39):
I love it.
Tell us in the chat or in thecomments when you catch the
replay.
What kind of rest are youreclaiming this season, Wayne,
it is always my heart's joy tospend this time with you and our
Midlife Revolution Unleashedcommunity.
Wayne Dawson (32:58):
And our Midlife Revolution Unleashed community.
Same here, Stacy.
So we have told the folks justnow where to catch us.
You can DM me if you want tohave a one-on-one to see if
we're a good fit to help youalong the way.
And same for Stacy.
Stacy M. Lewis (33:14):
Anytime, you know how to reach me.
We'll see you next time, folks.
Wayne Dawson (33:21):
God bless.
And there you have it, folks.
This week's episode of theMidlife Revolution Unleashed.
Hey, we truly appreciate yourspending this time in this space
with us.
Join us next week at the sametime as we dive into relevant
topics and present solutions tospark new thinking and empower
(33:43):
your midlife journey.
Stacy M. Lewis (33:45):
And don't forget if you enjoyed today's episode,
let us know in the comments andshare it with others.
And, of course, remember tosubscribe, share like.
Hit that notification bell.
You are the midlife revolutionunleashed.
I'm Coach Stacy and I'mcheering you on.
Wayne Dawson (34:05):
And I'm Coach Wayne and I'll see you at the
top.
you've just stepped into the midlife
revolution, unleashed your spaceto ignite possibility, redefine
purpose and embrace the powerthat comes with age and
experience, co-hosted by yourstruly coach and I'm coach stacy
m lewis.
Stacy M. Lewis (00:22):
We are two season coaches focused on the
midlife community of color.
This isn't just a podcast.
It's a movement in a world thatsometimes forgets the power and
the wisdom that comes with age.
We are here to ignite arevolution and rewrite the
narrative of this incrediblejourney narrative of this
(00:46):
incredible journey.
Wayne Dawson (00:47):
So, whether you're navigating your career, growing
your business, rediscoveringpassions or challenging the
status quo, this is your space.
So buckle up, let's dive intothe Midlife Revolution Unleashed
.
Hello, and we are here.
Welcome to another episode ofMidlife Revolution Unleashed.
(01:12):
I am Coach Wayne, the VIP coach, and I help brothers to move
across the threshold of midlifeland on their feet in the second
half, so it's their best half.
With me today is none otherthan the great Coach Stacy M
Lewis.
Stacy, how are you today?
Stacy M. Lewis (01:34):
I am fine and fantastic, coach Wayne.
It is always a pleasure tospend this time with you as I
try to get my lighting right.
Welcome everyone to the MidlifeRevolution Unleashed.
I am indeed your co-host, coachStacy M Lewis.
I'm a nonprofit executive, acoach to midlife women, a lover
(01:57):
of God and his people on mostdays, and I am always so excited
to share this platform to talkabout the richness of midlife
with my dear friend and co-host,coach Wayne.
Wayne Dawson (02:11):
Stacy, we are in the process of bantering on to
the next level and our life isjust filled with the next step,
the next thing.
And today we want to pause fora cause and talk about rest.
We want to help our friendslistening in to recognize the
(02:36):
importance of that four letterword, r-e-s-t, which is just as
important, if not more so, thanthe grind that we go through day
and day for success.
Stacy M. Lewis (02:50):
I could not agree with you more, and the
thought that just occurred to me, or I guess the thought I was
reminded of, is the reality thatGod, the creator of heaven and
earth, set the example for restright.
(03:10):
It talks about what happened onthe first day and on the second
day and on the third day, andthen the fourth, fifth and sixth
day, when God filled right Allthe things that he created with
on that first, second and thirdday.
On the seventh day, whathappened, Wayne?
(03:31):
What happened on the seventhday?
Wayne Dawson (03:33):
There was a pause for cause, just rest.
Stacy M. Lewis (03:38):
Not because we believe the creator needed the
rest, but was setting theexample for us to rest.
We have some successes.
It's a really stressful timeout there right now and we are
here to remind you, in thisseason of resilience, in this
(03:59):
season of wisdom, to remember torest.
There's a lot of talk about thehustle and grind, but we need
to rest to find power in thepause, so let's dive in.
Wayne Dawson (04:14):
Wayne, let's dive in.
So the one rest that most of usare accustomed to and aware of
is that physical rest where wetake a break.
Many of us do that the one waywe know how, which is through
sleep and there are many otheravenues and modalities of
(04:39):
physical rest, but we areaccustomed to sleep and even
that Stacy, there is a scienceto getting the maximum amount or
optimizing your sleep, thephysical rest.
It's important and I'll saythis that I know that there are
many folks who struggle withweight loss and weight
(05:02):
management per se, and one ofthe things that your trainer or
doctor, or whomever it is that'ssupervising, will let you know
is there is a balance and arelationship between your
gaining weight and the amount ofrest that you're getting.
Stacy M. Lewis (05:21):
Yes, I think you're right in that the
physical rest is the one that wetalk about.
The physical rest is extremelyimportant and as Wayne and I
were talking about this episode,we really began to look at Dr
(05:43):
Sondra Dalton- Smith's seventypes of rest.
So this is going to be a reallyrobust conversation because
getting that you know, put yourhead on the pillow, rest truly
important.
But there are so manyopportunities for us to rest not
just our body, our mind, ouremotions, et cetera.
(06:06):
So let's keep going, Wayne.
Yeah.
Wayne Dawson (06:10):
Yeah, Stacy, I was looking at some of the notes
that came up here.
And one of the things that youtalked about on the seventh day,
but we know that winter we talkabout.
There's a season for all thingsand, in terms of mother nature,
(06:31):
when you look out, if you arefrom that part of the country
where you experienced winter, itis indeed a time of rest as
well, isn't it?
Stacy M. Lewis (06:42):
At least in nature it is.
I don't know when it's cold outthere.
It's a little challenging toget that physical rest at least.
But you are absolutely right.
And good evening, Curtis.
It is always good to have youin the room.
So, Wayne, let's start to diveinto these seven types of rest
(07:05):
and really encourage ourlistener around easy
opportunities to engage in them,and prayerfully, technology
will be on our side.
There we go.
Where would you like to start?
You talked about physical rest.
Wayne Dawson (07:24):
Yeah, let's talk a little bit more about that
physical rest.
Stacy M. Lewis (07:27):
Stacy for me.
Wayne Dawson (07:28):
So, as a person who likes to go to the gym and
get my workout in, even duringthat period, for your body to
respond in terms of growth andstrength, you beat it up on your
workout days.
There has to be rest daysbetween, and there are two types
(07:49):
of rest days.
For the physical, there'spassive rest and there's active
rest.
Active rest is when you simplyjust do nothing, you just you go
into your winter, so to speak.
Vig, okay.
Passive rest, yes.
Passive rest is where you arenot necessarily forcing the body
but you're doing stretching,for example, and gentle massage
(08:14):
and that sort of stuff on theoff day, but you're still
resting and recuperating andrestoring.
Stacy M. Lewis (08:22):
It is important for you to be your best self,
that you make sure that youincorporate both in your routine
so what you just said, it wasreally around that the physical
rest, the physical aspect ofrest is not just about that
putting your head on the pillowbut it is, as you're saying.
(08:45):
The physical aspect of restcould be disconnecting from
everything else and getting thatwalk, but the physical aspect
of rest can also be and ifyou're working out, really
setting aside that time for yourbody to rest and restore, so
really taking the breaks.
(09:06):
I love that breakdown.
And good evening, delaine.
Always a pleasure to see her.
Wayne Dawson (09:12):
Good evening Delaine and brother Curtis, who
I owe a call.
Stacy M. Lewis (09:19):
I'm not in that.
Let's keep going and talkingabout rest.
Wayne Dawson (09:24):
Yes, Stacy, you want us to go clockwise or
counterclockwise on this?
I?
Stacy M. Lewis (09:28):
think we go where we want to go and I'm
happy to take what's next.
How about that?
I think one of the things thatI enjoy the most is creative
rest.
I think one of the things thatI enjoy the most is creative
rest, and I think we're allsomewhat naturally creative at
heart.
But that real opportunity tojust appreciate creativity, to
(09:55):
play, to enjoy the beauty, thegifts that are around you Uh,
that's what Dr Dalton talksabout as creative rest.
How does that resonate for you,Wayne?
I?
Wayne Dawson (10:11):
like it and it really works for me because I uh
, I like gardening inherited itfrom my mother's genes, I think.
Stacy M. Lewis (10:20):
My sisters.
Wayne Dawson (10:20):
They like gardening.
Delaine, vivian and I lovegardening and walking up to my
house, my neighbor also has agreen thumb and so she plants up
, and so do I, and we decorate,and it's spring, so we're
blooming.
Now come around the corner.
That mindset of a hectic day issort of relieved for me as I
(10:48):
see the beauty, the creativerest that comes on me, that
dawns on me, as I see thisbeautiful flower garden or these
gardens, and so you know, someof us can have that done too in
(11:09):
the way of just taking time outto play a puzzle during your
busy schedule to untangle themind that has been caught up in
productive activity throughoutthe day.
Stacy M. Lewis (11:23):
I love it.
I love it, and so it is thatconnecting right.
The creative rest is part ofthat.
Connecting with things thatinspire you, that you find
beautiful, that, where you'reable to create, is what, to me,
you were talking about as youare gardening, as well as when
(11:46):
you're able to step back andappreciate what has been created
or what is blooming and toreally acknowledge that right.
It doesn't have to be a bigcelebration, but acknowledging
that beauty in silence iscreative rest love it social
(12:09):
rest.
Wayne Dawson (12:10):
how?
How could we leave this out?
Because when we talk aboutsocial rest, we're talking about
not just getting away from thenoisy neighbors, but we're
talking about social rest in theway of the interactions that we
have, many of whom, many of thepeople that I know, are caught
(12:31):
up with this and don't take abreak.
You know, you may think you'regetting a break because you're
holding this computer in yourhand.
We call a telephone, but ifyou're on it, scrolling 24-7 and
getting engaged in social media, you're not giving yourself the
due and needed social rest, andthat's very important.
Stacy M. Lewis (12:55):
Yeah, what I think is interesting about the
concept of social rest I thinkit's interesting about the
concept of social rest, right isthat it was likely developed.
This is my imagination, I couldbe totally wrong here because I
don't know the dates, but mythought is that it was likely
developed really before the rampup of social media, media.
(13:28):
And so, yes, there's the waythat social rest and sensory
rest work together, right.
So the social media is reallyimpacting, right, the sensory
experience, to your point, thelooking at the screens, the
hearing, the videos or theringings, the devices and when I
think about the social restit's also being focused on that
(13:57):
are fueling or energizing andresting from relationships or
social environments that aredraining or toxic.
So listening to you really forme, draws a closer relationship
(14:19):
between social rest and sensoryrest.
Wayne Dawson (14:23):
You know the older I've gotten the less tolerant I
am.
Of bedlam you know crazy, noisypeople and places and things.
And so I really even hearingthings in the kitchen drop pots
and pans being moved up and downkind of gets on my nerves and
(14:44):
gets me on edge.
So for me, social rest is veryimportant.
As I've gotten older I findthat I have much less tolerance
for the humbug of, you know, bigcrowds.
I got to pull away from that.
I never was one who enjoyed it.
To be honest, if I didn't getaccess backstage or through
(15:08):
access upfront, it was difficultfor me to join lines and that
sort of thing.
But we need that social restStacy.
Oftentimes our nerves are onend because of so much
bombardment.
And to your point, back to thesensory rest.
You know, when you are aroundfolks, especially outside of
(15:31):
your locus of control, you can'tcontrol them socially.
It means that there is more, Iguess, infiltration on your
space sensorily.
Stacy M. Lewis (15:44):
Absolutely, absolutely, which means that
it's also connected.
Right, so clearly they all worktogether.
Right?
We have this beautiful circulardiagram.
Listening to you talk about thepots and pans and the crowds.
Touches on the social, on thesensory and on the emotional
(16:10):
rest.
That importance of reallygiving ourselves permission to
feel right, to acknowledge thefeels right, as they say, to
acknowledge that, you know, whenI hear these certain sounds, it
really resonates in me in a notso good way.
(16:33):
But that permission to say thisis how I'm feeling, without
judging it, without fixing it,but acknowledging it, is a form
of emotional rest, like, okay,I'm not going to beat myself up
because I didn't X, y and Z, I'mgoing to say this is what
(16:55):
happened, I gave it my best, Iappreciate me, this is what
happened, I gave it my best, Iappreciate me and I acknowledge
how I feel about it and not letit overtake me or be consumed in
me, trying to fix it or judgeit.
Wayne Dawson (17:12):
Yeah, stace, have we totally turned the page on
the sensory rest piece, or can I?
Stacy M. Lewis (17:19):
add one more piece on that.
Oh, go right ahead.
Blue screens.
Wayne Dawson (17:21):
Sensory rest piece .
Or can I add one more piece onthat?
Oh, go right ahead.
Blue screens, sensory rest.
A lot of folks retire for thenight, including moi, and we
take with us the blue screen,the TV, or we take with us the
computer, with us the computer.
(17:45):
It is said that, in terms ofthe brain waves, that helps you
with restoration and the periodin the what's known as a
circadian rhythm.
Uh, the body goes through itsphases of sleep cycle and rest,
um, and there is a supposedly anoptimal period, and that's
usually, they say, between 10and 2, where you're getting the
most regenerative rest.
During that period thebrainwaves slow down to alpha
(18:09):
and theta waves and then, whendeep sleep, it's delta, but
there is beta waves, whichhappens while you are alive and
well and visibly doing things.
Blue screens keep your betalevels high, which means that
you're not in the rest zone,sensorily watching TV or
(18:30):
watching your handheld computer,the telephone, whatever.
Within two hours of going tosleep, they suggest you unplug
from all of that, all yourdevices, and so they have done
enough tests to recognize thatthis is in fact real and a
(18:50):
problem in our society today.
Stacy M. Lewis (18:54):
I don't believe that any of us are shocked by
that.
I certainly appreciate youbringing in the science behind
the disconnect from all of thesethings before you try to lay
your head down and restpeacefully.
So thank you for adding thatvery valuable nugget, Coach
(19:18):
Wayne.
Wayne Dawson (19:20):
Stacy mental rest.
You want to take that one on.
Stacy M. Lewis (19:24):
Absolutely.
I think that we can all easilyconnect with or understand
mental rest.
It is when we are allowing ourmind, our thoughts, to take a
break.
Many people refer to it asmindfulness.
We are often talking aboutmindfulness, but it really is
(19:48):
the freeing the mind from theconstant decision-making, the
fatigue from decision-making.
I don't know, Wayne, if you sawthe post today on LinkedIn
where the young lady I believeit was Charmaine talked about
the number of decisions that wemake every day and the range she
(20:11):
presented, which wasevidence-based, was from 6,000
to like 70,000, right, so a hugenumber in there, and imagine
the mental, the emotional, thatall of that energy being spent
and the need for our minds torest in order to refuel.
(20:38):
So I love the idea of mentalrest, in particular, when it
comes to decision fatigue.
Wayne Dawson (20:47):
Yeah, Let me touch on the fellas for a minute.
The boys boy talk.
Stacy M. Lewis (20:53):
Go right ahead.
Wayne Dawson (20:54):
You know one of the things that is happening
right across the country men ofcolor are imploding in many ways
because they're not getting themental and we'll talk a little
bit too about that emotionalpiece the rest, we are burnt out
.
But because we believe that wehave to show up as tough, hard,
(21:20):
managing it all, not asking forhelp we are not able to diffuse
the stressors that we aredealing with mentally right,
just getting up and going into aworld where you're not
recognized as a full man.
that alone is stressful, andbecause we're not asking for
(21:42):
help, because we don't take timeout we're too busy grinding, we
don't take a pause, as ourtitle suggests, today we
eventually implode.
It shows up in hypertension.
It shows up in weight gain aswell yes, for men too.
It shows up as heart failure,among some other things.
(22:06):
It shows up as aggression andviolence, and and and addictions
.
So it's very important that wepay attention to this mental
rest attention to this mentalrest.
Stacy M. Lewis (22:26):
Yeah, I agree with you, and while I believe
that many of our listeners thathappen to be women, midlife
women, can relate to what it isyou just shared about men I mean
and experientially relate, oneof the challenges for women is
the mental and emotionalexhaustion from holding so much
(22:53):
in, from looking to manage,support many others' emotional
needs, many others' social needsand really, you know,
performing at work, performingin business, so many decisions
(23:15):
and such high levels ofexhaustion we're holding in.
That you know, while we may notand we certainly are not here to
be scientists, so I'm not surethe data that talks about, you
know the correlation, say,between holding it all in and
(23:37):
addiction or holding it all in,and you know stress levels, but
what we do know is that thosestress levels and that holding
it all in does increase cortisol, which is known to proven to
data research says increasesweight gain, and so when you
(24:03):
think about that holding it allin and the number of us and I
say us as myself, as a midlifewoman and someone that struggles
with managing these pounds thatjust don't seem to want to go
away, I need to, I'm remindedand I appreciate this episode
(24:24):
because I'm reminded to look atwhat I might be holding in, look
at opportunities for mentalrest, for emotional rest, and
engage that in ways that help mefeel better.
Wayne Dawson (24:42):
Yeah, and the word is seek support.
There's no shame in the game.
You know talking to the fellasespecially and I'm sure across
the board to our femalecounterpart, when you're dealing
with enough too much a lot, youcan ask for help.
(25:07):
It's okay.
It doesn't make you less of ahuman being or an adult or a
responsible person.
You can ask for help.
Stacy M. Lewis (25:16):
I agree with you 2000%.
I agree with you 2000%.
And the one rest aspect that wedid not talk about is that
spiritual rest.
And what we mean when we sayspiritual rest, it really is in
that opportunity to connect withyour creator and say like this
(25:39):
is what's going on right thescripture talks about.
He's saying my burdens are likegive it to me, I'll take it,
cast all your cares on me.
And so again, a great selfreminder that I don't have to
hold it all.
To your point, Wayne, we don'thave to hold it all, we are not
(26:03):
meant to hold it all.
And what opportunities do wehave to really engage in
spiritual rest?
And it doesn't only have to beprayer, it can be talking with
someone right that shares kindof that spiritual connection
really, or doing things thatconnect you with your purpose.
(26:27):
That is spiritual rest and acritical part, I believe, of us
being able to move forward.
Wayne Dawson (26:35):
Yeah, Spiritual rest is going beyond self, right
, it's connecting to somethingmore whole and full than you.
So thus we talk about God, butso too is community, and
community that share in alike-mindedness also offers us a
(27:01):
sounding board, a place to findour spiritual, as it were,
connection.
So you know, at a time likethis, especially at a time like
this, where there is so muchdivision and issues around sense
of belonging, one truly needsthat time to set aside for
(27:24):
community rest, spiritual rest.
And again, Stacy to your point,we're not talking about toxic
communities, right?
We're talking about supportivecommunities that resonate with
the wholeness which is beyondourself.
Stacy M. Lewis (27:40):
There are multiple opportunities right
throughout every day for each ofus to connect with each of
these seven types of rest.
We talked about physical rest,mental rest, emotional rest,
social rest, sensory rest,creative rest and spiritual rest
(28:05):
.
We want to remind ourselves andour listeners that rest is not
a weakness.
It is an important part of lifeand thriving, and, as we shared
earlier that we've got a greatdemonstration of the position,
(28:33):
the priority of rest, rest andso our hope is that this episode
is indeed doing just thatreminding us all that rest is
important.
The grind is the grind, but wedon't have to live in the grind.
Wayne Dawson (28:50):
My other brother, paul Newell, is on the line, and
Paul, thank you for jumpingthrough my brother.
We got to do something togetherthis Thursday, so so I gotta
give you a call, or call, oh boyI'm just saying coach Wayne is
using tonight's episode as hisreconnect with the brother tribe
episode as well.
Stacy M. Lewis (29:12):
Okay, paul, y'all, y'all have figured out
trust and believe you know.
Wayne, I saw in our notes thisquote by Jim Lehrer, and it says
energy, not, it is that restthat is going to allow us to
(29:42):
renew the energy so that we canreally perform at our peak.
It's not about hustling grind,it really is about being smart
and utilizing the resources ofenergy and time, and so I really
(30:02):
like that quote.
And we talked about currencylast episode, so for those of
you didn't check it out, feelfree to go to Midlife Revolution
Unleashed on your favoritepodcast player and catch that
episode as well.
Wayne Dawson (30:17):
And catch that episode as well.
What you got to say, it's thebottom of the hour we got to get
out of here.
You know, just turn the lightsout and close the door behind
you.
Stacy M. Lewis (30:28):
It's not, it's not.
It is not that, hey, golly,turn off the lights and close
the door.
The music has stopped, theturntables are shutting down.
What we want to remind ouraudience, right is, here are a
couple of questions, so to speak, to think about as you consider
(30:49):
what we talked about tonight.
What scares you about stopping,about pausing, about resting?
Maybe you don't have a problemwith rest and so you're like, oh
no, this is good, good reminderto continue my rest patterns.
(31:10):
Who are you, apart from whatyou do or what you provide?
So often, what we do and whatwe provide is so entrenched into
who we believe we are.
That that's what causes us tokeep going on that hustle and
grind.
And are you performing rest oractually living it?
Wayne Dawson (31:34):
Yeah, stace, sir, there's a time for everything,
as we said In the season, andfor sure If we remind ourselves
that when things are slow Forfolks who are In the grind
Making that cheese, that dinero,if things are slow, we have to
(31:58):
recognize that, even In theuniverse of multiplication and
making of money, there is aseason of rest, and so, if we
start reframing what that means,it's perhaps a time to sit back
and to selectively see where weare sowing our seeds before
(32:20):
reaping season.
So don't always see slowness andrest as death or destruction.
Oftentimes it can be seen asthe launch pin to production and
abundance.
Stacy M. Lewis (32:39):
I love it.
Tell us in the chat or in thecomments when you catch the
replay.
What kind of rest are youreclaiming this season, Wayne,
it is always my heart's joy tospend this time with you and our
Midlife Revolution Unleashedcommunity.
Wayne Dawson (32:58):
And our Midlife Revolution Unleashed community.
Same here, Stacy.
So we have told the folks justnow where to catch us.
You can DM me if you want tohave a one-on-one to see if
we're a good fit to help youalong the way.
And same for Stacy.
Stacy M. Lewis (33:14):
Anytime, you know how to reach me.
We'll see you next time, folks.
Wayne Dawson (33:21):
God bless.
And there you have it, folks.
This week's episode of theMidlife Revolution Unleashed.
Hey, we truly appreciate yourspending this time in this space
with us.
Join us next week at the sametime as we dive into relevant
topics and present solutions tospark new thinking and empower
(33:43):
your midlife journey.
Stacy M. Lewis (33:45):
And don't forget if you enjoyed today's episode,
let us know in the comments andshare it with others.
And, of course, remember tosubscribe, share like.
Hit that notification bell.
You are the midlife revolutionunleashed.
I'm Coach Stacy and I'mcheering you on.
Wayne Dawson (34:05):
And I'm Coach Wayne and I'll see you at the
top.
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