How to Navigate Conflict and Respond Better to Emotions | Ann Pierce

Today on Modern Relationships Erik Torenberg talks to Ann Pierce, a former startup founder who became obsessed with the mission of solving interpersonal conflict. Ann unpacks why conflict isn't inherently negative but actually builds trust when handled correctly. She covers why invalidation is the most common threat most of us encounter, how we misunderstand each other through projection, and how to break the cycles of conflict. Modern Relationships is a podcast from Turpentine. Learn more: www.turpentine.co -- SPONSOR: Relationship Hero It’s an open secret in Silicon Valley that people are using relationship coaches. Sign up for 1-on-1 relationship coaching (from anywhere) at RelationshipHero.com/modern. Get $50 off your first session. -- LINKS: Ann Pierce Website: https://www.annpierce.com/ Ann Pierce - Understanding Interpersonal Conflict: https://substack.com/home/post/p-153042013?utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web Love Symposium: https://symposium.love/ -- FOLLOW ON X: Ann - @itsannpierce Erik - @eriktorenberg Turpentine - @turpentinemedia Chapters 00:00:00 Intro and Preview 00:01:56 Ann's Background and Research Journey 00:04:01 The Compatibility Question 00:06:00 Understanding Healthy Conflict 00:08:00 Personality Typologies and Wounds 00:12:27 Sponsor: Relationship Hero 00:14:04 The Nature of Threat Sensitivity 00:17:07 Breaking Conflict Cycles 00:20:16 Moving Beyond Binary Thinking 00:23:02 How Emotions Function 00:28:33 Emotional Regulation Tools 00:33:44 Misinterpreting Each Other 00:39:22 Language and Misunderstandings 00:44:35 Overcoming Threat Sensitivity 00:54:31 Building Self-Worth and Self-Esteem 00:55:21 Critiques of Couples Therapy 00:59:24 Practical Steps for Self-Improvement 01:01:29 Training and Practice for Better Relationships 01:04:36 The Love Symposium and Future Work 01:05:24 Wrap