Ever find yourself spiraling in self-doubt, overanalyzing every decision and wishing someone would just tell you the “right” answer? In this episode, Kelly Irene unpacks the all-too-common pattern of second-guessing yourself—especially when your choices don’t look like everyone else’s—and reveals how your birth chart can help you re-center. Learn why doubt often isn’t a flaw, but a signal that something’s out of alignment with your true energetic makeup. You’ll discover how to use your Sun, Moon, and Rising signs to get clear on what’s driving your hesitation, and how to make decisions that actually feel like you.
Whether you’re weighing a big career move, struggling with a tough conversation, or just tired of trying to do things “the right way,” this episode will help you move forward with clarity, confidence, and alignment.
Additional Resources:
Download the free guide to your sun, moon, and rising signs: https://mosttrueyou.com/guide
Join The Most True You Community (Free!) https://mosttrueyou.mn.co/
Schedule a Birth Chart Reading https://calendly.com/mosttrueyou/birth-chart-reading
Join the community at mosttrueyou.com/community
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
You know that feeling when youthink you know what you want to
do, but the moment you seesomeone else doing it
differently, maybe moreconfident, more polished, more,
right.
You start to questioneverything.
Yeah.
That one.
I see it all the time in myself,in the clients I work with.
We all show up in the world withour unique energy, our cosmic
(00:21):
blueprint.
But when we look around and wesee others doing it differently,
it's easy to think, maybe I'mdoing it wrong, and we
immediately start to secondguess ourselves.
Let me give you an example ofthis.
Early in my career, I was hiredto be an executive assistant
because I had proven my abilityto be proactive at work, but I
had never been an executiveassistant before.
(00:43):
So I did what many of us do.
I started researching how can Ibe the best executive assistant
possible.
I bought an ebook, I took notes,and I followed somebody else's
framework.
But the problem is I was takingadvice from someone who had no
idea that my strengths were notin replicating somebody else's
process, but in finding my own.
(01:05):
And so I spent the first fewweeks learning their method, and
then I spent the next six monthsdoing anything but my job
because I was so frustrated withit.
And by the time that I left therole three years later, I
honestly was filled with regretsabout that because in that
setting, I didn't trust myself.
(01:25):
I spent the entire time tryingto follow somebody else's way of
doing things rather thanaligning with my own.
Fast forward to today, I'm an HRdirector.
And I'm a speaker and a coachfocused on busting the taboo
around astrology in theworkplace.
That alone causes me a lot ofsecond guessing.
Sometimes I think it would beeasier to do what other people
(01:47):
in the corporate spaces aredoing.
Focus on leadership frameworks,communication models, behavioral
assessments, but not astrology.
And it would be so easy for meto say,"let me tone down the
woo-woo weirdo stuff and stickto what's more acceptable and
what I see happening around me."But the thing is, that's not me.
(02:07):
I'm here to talk about bothbecause that's the alignment
that I'm called to live into.
I still do communication.
I do leadership, I do strategy,and I'm really, really good at
it, but I can't disconnect thatfrom my passion for astrology
because I'm not meant to.
That's how I find my own senseof purpose.
(02:28):
And it's tough because nobodyshows me the right way to do
this.
It would be so nice if somebodydid like, hand me a manual, hand
me a map and I will get to work.
But instead, what I have to do,what all of us have to do is
face the doubt.
I have to face my secondguessing.
And then when I do that.
I can re-root into who I know Iam.
(02:51):
And for me, I do that byremembering my birth chart.
It doesn't give me that mapnecessarily, but it does remind
me about what's true about me sothat I can decide where I want
to go and what's aligned withthat truth.
For a lot of us.
Second guessing shows up when wedon't have clear external proof.
(03:12):
We want somebody to tell us thatwe're making the right decision,
right?
It would be so much easier ifsomeone said, yeah, this is the
decision you have to make.
Whether it's hiring somebody,taking a new job of our own,
writing that difficult email, orsetting a boundary.
It would be so much easier if wehad somebody say, yep, that's
the right way to do it.
But most of the time thatexternal validation never comes.
(03:34):
We have to give it forourselves, and that is so much
easier to do when we root ourdecisions in alignment, not
somebody else's rules, not whatlooks confident for somebody
else, but what is energeticallytrue for us.
So how do we do thispractically?
Because this could feel reallyout there.
(03:54):
I want to bring it into reality.
Let's say you're second guessingyourself.
Maybe it's a choice that youmade recently or one that you
need to make soon.
I want you to bring thatsituation to mind.
No judgment.
We're going to stay reallyneutral and curious in this.
The first thing I want you to dois just acknowledge it.
This is the first step in thevast majority of what I teach.
(04:16):
Acknowledge it.
Neutrally see where you're at.
You're second guessing, you'reruminating, you're hesitating,
you're overanalyzing.
That's a fact, not a flaw.
It is what we do.
After you acknowledge that, thenI want you to ask, what is the
doubt really about?
(04:37):
And here's where your big threeare going to come in your sun,
moon, and rising signs, becausea lot of times, second guessing
is your system telling youyou're ignoring a core truth
about yourself.
Or you're being asked to actfrom a part of you that you're
not fully comfortable with yet.
I want to repeat that.
(04:58):
Oftentimes second guessing isyour system telling you that
either you are ignoringsomething that is a core truth
about yourself, or you're beingasked to act from a part of you
that you're not fullycomfortable with yet.
When I was an executiveassistant, I didn't know my
Capricorn moon yet.
(05:18):
The part of me that thrives onstructure and challenge and a
high achievement.
That job met those needs, but Ididn't trust it.
I thought that I had to do itsomeone else's way.
Later when I was married to apastor, I was constantly second
guessing myself as a pastor'swife.
And that was just because somuch of that role required me to
(05:41):
support norms that excludedother people and they clashed
hard with my Aquarius sun, whichpushes boundaries and champions
collective wellbeing.
Both of those times, that secondguessing was not proof that I
was broken.
It was a sign that I was out ofalignment.
So once you've done that, you'veacknowledged it.
(06:01):
You're starting to see wherethis second guessing is coming
from.
Then I want you to ask betterquestions.
Here's a few journal questionsyou can use based on your sun,
moon, and rising, and if youdon't know them yet, pause.
Pause this podcast for a minute,pause the video if you're
watching it, and I want you togo to mosttrueyou.com/guide, and
(06:27):
that guide is going to walk youstep by step through how to find
your sun, moon, and rising sign.
How you pull your birth chartwhere do you do that.
How do you identify them andwhat they are.
If you're not a hundred percentsure what those are, you know
how to find your, uh, your birthchart, still use the guide.
It's really, it's short, it'ssimple, it's beautiful.
Um, it's free.
I cannot recommend it enough.
(06:47):
So once you know your sun, moon,and rising sign, I want you to
think through, journal throughtalk through, think through
these questions.
Does this doubt indicate thatI'm going against how I
naturally shine- my sun sign?
Might this doubt be indicating aplace that I'm not honoring my
emotional needs.
Your moon sign will help youwith that.
(07:10):
And then, is this doubt or isthis second guessing about the
way that I see the world or howI want to be seen?
That's going to be a risingsign.
Okay.
So think through that.
What is it connected to?
Is it connected to your sunsign, how you shine?
Your moon, sign, what you need,your emotional needs, your sense
of wellbeing?
Or is it connected to how yousee the world, that lens that
(07:32):
you see the world through, andthat others see you through the
rising sign?
And then I want you to thinkabout alignment.
So let's say that you're risingsign is cancer.
You're empathic, you'renurturing, you're home oriented,
but you're trying to thrive in ahigh conflict, fast-paced, work
culture, that tension is notweakness.
It's a misalignment.
(07:54):
You don't need to fix yourselfto fit into that culture.
You need to ask,"how can I bringmy cancer rising strengths of
empathy and nurture into thisspace, or find a new space that
honors them?" Those are twodifferent questions, but they're
both worth, worth asking.
So here's an example from one ofmy clients.
(08:15):
She had a really great joboffer, but she was naturally
second guessing it.
It was a huge decision.
It was exciting, but it meantleaving a company that she had
grown up in.
And she was asking, is this theright decision for me?
So we looked at her chart, hersouth node is in cancer, north
node in Capricorn.
She values family really deeply,but her soul's growth path is in
(08:39):
structure and leadership.
She has Libra Sun and LibraRising, so she is wired to make
decisions that considereverybody.
That's a big part of why she wasthinking about how this decision
was going to impact everybody ather current role.
And then her Sagittarius moon,it craves expansion and new
experiences, especially onesthat she can turn into wisdom
(09:00):
for other people.
So this new job was aligned, butshe was afraid of disappointing
the people that she cared about.
So we mapped out what she neededto ask for in that new role to
feel secure enough to take it.
And she did that.
She moved forward withcertainty-- To a certain extent,
yeah.
(09:21):
But more than that withalignment.
And you know what I love aboutthis?
There's some really cool partsof this.
Her old company celebrated hermove, and now in her new role,
she's actually working inpartnership with her old company
from the new role.
She trusted herself, not thecrowd.
She worked from a place ofalignment, even without 100%
(09:44):
certainty.
So the takeaway for you is Iwant you to stop trying to get
it"right." I want you to startasking, not"is this right?" But
"is this aligned?" In thatyou're going to feel more
confident because that's acompletely different decision.
You're going to feel moreconfident, you're going to feel
more energized.
You're going to feel moresatisfied when your decisions
(10:07):
reflect your energetic truth andyour cosmic blueprint.
Okay.
Your next steps, download thefree guide to your big three,
finding Your Astrology.
It's MostTrueyou.com/guide.
I'll put the link in the notesand then journal through the
decision that you're secondguessing either a decision
(10:27):
you've already made that you'reruminating about.
Maybe overanalyzing.
It happens.
Or the decision that you aretrying to make and look at where
might this be out of alignmentwith your Sun, moon, or rising
sign, or where might this becalling you into deeper
alignment with those signs.
You might be being asked to stepoutta your comfort zone a little
(10:48):
bit here, and then I want you toemail me.
Send me an email at hello, atmost true you.com and tell me
about the decision that you'resecond guessing.
Tell me what you're finding asyou do this.
And if you're interested.
Book a chart reading.
Let's dive into your charttogether and look at how you can
make decisions that are alignednot only with your big three,
(11:09):
but with your entire chart, yourentire cosmic blueprint.
I'll put that link in the shownotes as well.
Remember, you already have theanswers.
Your chart is not going to makethe decision for you, but it
will show you how to make themin alignment with your true
self.
This is what I want for you tobe rooted, aligned in your true
(11:30):
self.
Let's stop second guessing andstart showing up in alignment
with our cosmic blueprint.
You know that feeling when youthink you know what you want to
do, but the moment you seesomeone else doing it
differently, maybe moreconfident, more polished, more,
right.
You start to questioneverything.
Yeah.
That one.
I see it all the time in myself,in the clients I work with.
We all show up in the world withour unique energy, our cosmic
(00:21):
blueprint.
But when we look around and wesee others doing it differently,
it's easy to think, maybe I'mdoing it wrong, and we
immediately start to secondguess ourselves.
Let me give you an example ofthis.
Early in my career, I was hiredto be an executive assistant
because I had proven my abilityto be proactive at work, but I
had never been an executiveassistant before.
(00:43):
So I did what many of us do.
I started researching how can Ibe the best executive assistant
possible.
I bought an ebook, I took notes,and I followed somebody else's
framework.
But the problem is I was takingadvice from someone who had no
idea that my strengths were notin replicating somebody else's
process, but in finding my own.
(01:05):
And so I spent the first fewweeks learning their method, and
then I spent the next six monthsdoing anything but my job
because I was so frustrated withit.
And by the time that I left therole three years later, I
honestly was filled with regretsabout that because in that
setting, I didn't trust myself.
(01:25):
I spent the entire time tryingto follow somebody else's way of
doing things rather thanaligning with my own.
Fast forward to today, I'm an HRdirector.
And I'm a speaker and a coachfocused on busting the taboo
around astrology in theworkplace.
That alone causes me a lot ofsecond guessing.
Sometimes I think it would beeasier to do what other people
(01:47):
in the corporate spaces aredoing.
Focus on leadership frameworks,communication models, behavioral
assessments, but not astrology.
And it would be so easy for meto say,"let me tone down the
woo-woo weirdo stuff and stickto what's more acceptable and
what I see happening around me."But the thing is, that's not me.
(02:07):
I'm here to talk about bothbecause that's the alignment
that I'm called to live into.
I still do communication.
I do leadership, I do strategy,and I'm really, really good at
it, but I can't disconnect thatfrom my passion for astrology
because I'm not meant to.
That's how I find my own senseof purpose.
(02:28):
And it's tough because nobodyshows me the right way to do
this.
It would be so nice if somebodydid like, hand me a manual, hand
me a map and I will get to work.
But instead, what I have to do,what all of us have to do is
face the doubt.
I have to face my secondguessing.
And then when I do that.
I can re-root into who I know Iam.
(02:51):
And for me, I do that byremembering my birth chart.
It doesn't give me that mapnecessarily, but it does remind
me about what's true about me sothat I can decide where I want
to go and what's aligned withthat truth.
For a lot of us.
Second guessing shows up when wedon't have clear external proof.
(03:12):
We want somebody to tell us thatwe're making the right decision,
right?
It would be so much easier ifsomeone said, yeah, this is the
decision you have to make.
Whether it's hiring somebody,taking a new job of our own,
writing that difficult email, orsetting a boundary.
It would be so much easier if wehad somebody say, yep, that's
the right way to do it.
But most of the time thatexternal validation never comes.
(03:34):
We have to give it forourselves, and that is so much
easier to do when we root ourdecisions in alignment, not
somebody else's rules, not whatlooks confident for somebody
else, but what is energeticallytrue for us.
So how do we do thispractically?
Because this could feel reallyout there.
(03:54):
I want to bring it into reality.
Let's say you're second guessingyourself.
Maybe it's a choice that youmade recently or one that you
need to make soon.
I want you to bring thatsituation to mind.
No judgment.
We're going to stay reallyneutral and curious in this.
The first thing I want you to dois just acknowledge it.
This is the first step in thevast majority of what I teach.
(04:16):
Acknowledge it.
Neutrally see where you're at.
You're second guessing, you'reruminating, you're hesitating,
you're overanalyzing.
That's a fact, not a flaw.
It is what we do.
After you acknowledge that, thenI want you to ask, what is the
doubt really about?
(04:37):
And here's where your big threeare going to come in your sun,
moon, and rising signs, becausea lot of times, second guessing
is your system telling youyou're ignoring a core truth
about yourself.
Or you're being asked to actfrom a part of you that you're
not fully comfortable with yet.
I want to repeat that.
(04:58):
Oftentimes second guessing isyour system telling you that
either you are ignoringsomething that is a core truth
about yourself, or you're beingasked to act from a part of you
that you're not fullycomfortable with yet.
When I was an executiveassistant, I didn't know my
Capricorn moon yet.
(05:18):
The part of me that thrives onstructure and challenge and a
high achievement.
That job met those needs, but Ididn't trust it.
I thought that I had to do itsomeone else's way.
Later when I was married to apastor, I was constantly second
guessing myself as a pastor'swife.
And that was just because somuch of that role required me to
(05:41):
support norms that excludedother people and they clashed
hard with my Aquarius sun, whichpushes boundaries and champions
collective wellbeing.
Both of those times, that secondguessing was not proof that I
was broken.
It was a sign that I was out ofalignment.
So once you've done that, you'veacknowledged it.
(06:01):
You're starting to see wherethis second guessing is coming
from.
Then I want you to ask betterquestions.
Here's a few journal questionsyou can use based on your sun,
moon, and rising, and if youdon't know them yet, pause.
Pause this podcast for a minute,pause the video if you're
watching it, and I want you togo to mosttrueyou.com/guide, and
(06:27):
that guide is going to walk youstep by step through how to find
your sun, moon, and rising sign.
How you pull your birth chartwhere do you do that.
How do you identify them andwhat they are.
If you're not a hundred percentsure what those are, you know
how to find your, uh, your birthchart, still use the guide.
It's really, it's short, it'ssimple, it's beautiful.
Um, it's free.
I cannot recommend it enough.
(06:47):
So once you know your sun, moon,and rising sign, I want you to
think through, journal throughtalk through, think through
these questions.
Does this doubt indicate thatI'm going against how I
naturally shine- my sun sign?
Might this doubt be indicating aplace that I'm not honoring my
emotional needs.
Your moon sign will help youwith that.
(07:10):
And then, is this doubt or isthis second guessing about the
way that I see the world or howI want to be seen?
That's going to be a risingsign.
Okay.
So think through that.
What is it connected to?
Is it connected to your sunsign, how you shine?
Your moon, sign, what you need,your emotional needs, your sense
of wellbeing?
Or is it connected to how yousee the world, that lens that
(07:32):
you see the world through, andthat others see you through the
rising sign?
And then I want you to thinkabout alignment.
So let's say that you're risingsign is cancer.
You're empathic, you'renurturing, you're home oriented,
but you're trying to thrive in ahigh conflict, fast-paced, work
culture, that tension is notweakness.
It's a misalignment.
(07:54):
You don't need to fix yourselfto fit into that culture.
You need to ask,"how can I bringmy cancer rising strengths of
empathy and nurture into thisspace, or find a new space that
honors them?" Those are twodifferent questions, but they're
both worth, worth asking.
So here's an example from one ofmy clients.
(08:15):
She had a really great joboffer, but she was naturally
second guessing it.
It was a huge decision.
It was exciting, but it meantleaving a company that she had
grown up in.
And she was asking, is this theright decision for me?
So we looked at her chart, hersouth node is in cancer, north
node in Capricorn.
She values family really deeply,but her soul's growth path is in
(08:39):
structure and leadership.
She has Libra Sun and LibraRising, so she is wired to make
decisions that considereverybody.
That's a big part of why she wasthinking about how this decision
was going to impact everybody ather current role.
And then her Sagittarius moon,it craves expansion and new
experiences, especially onesthat she can turn into wisdom
(09:00):
for other people.
So this new job was aligned, butshe was afraid of disappointing
the people that she cared about.
So we mapped out what she neededto ask for in that new role to
feel secure enough to take it.
And she did that.
She moved forward withcertainty-- To a certain extent,
yeah.
(09:21):
But more than that withalignment.
And you know what I love aboutthis?
There's some really cool partsof this.
Her old company celebrated hermove, and now in her new role,
she's actually working inpartnership with her old company
from the new role.
She trusted herself, not thecrowd.
She worked from a place ofalignment, even without 100%
(09:44):
certainty.
So the takeaway for you is Iwant you to stop trying to get
it"right." I want you to startasking, not"is this right?" But
"is this aligned?" In thatyou're going to feel more
confident because that's acompletely different decision.
You're going to feel moreconfident, you're going to feel
more energized.
You're going to feel moresatisfied when your decisions
(10:07):
reflect your energetic truth andyour cosmic blueprint.
Okay.
Your next steps, download thefree guide to your big three,
finding Your Astrology.
It's MostTrueyou.com/guide.
I'll put the link in the notesand then journal through the
decision that you're secondguessing either a decision
(10:27):
you've already made that you'reruminating about.
Maybe overanalyzing.
It happens.
Or the decision that you aretrying to make and look at where
might this be out of alignmentwith your Sun, moon, or rising
sign, or where might this becalling you into deeper
alignment with those signs.
You might be being asked to stepoutta your comfort zone a little
(10:48):
bit here, and then I want you toemail me.
Send me an email at hello, atmost true you.com and tell me
about the decision that you'resecond guessing.
Tell me what you're finding asyou do this.
And if you're interested.
Book a chart reading.
Let's dive into your charttogether and look at how you can
make decisions that are alignednot only with your big three,
(11:09):
but with your entire chart, yourentire cosmic blueprint.
I'll put that link in the shownotes as well.
Remember, you already have theanswers.
Your chart is not going to makethe decision for you, but it
will show you how to make themin alignment with your true
self.
This is what I want for you tobe rooted, aligned in your true
(11:30):
self.
Let's stop second guessing andstart showing up in alignment
with our cosmic blueprint.
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