April 25, 2025 • 29 mins
Join Dr. Pete and Laura Walton as we learn to transform our grief into purpose.
Grief On Purpose is a refuge built on heartbreak, courage, and intention. This is a place where grief, death, and dying are not avoided, but are met with compassion, curiosity, and unwavering support. Here, your pain is held, your story is honored, and your path is guided with great care. This is where love endures, where loss transforms, and where you are never alone.
https://www.griefonpurpose.com/about
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:17):
Hello, welcome back to On Air with Dr Pete.
As you know, we try and bringyou many different topics of
discussion.
Some are happy, some areinteresting and some are sad,
and today's topic, although notalways pleasant, it's important
in a heavier conversationrelated to grief.
If you're a human, then youmost certainly have faced grief
and, as mental healthprofessionals, we're going to
bring you some insight into thattoday, and that's why I'm so
(00:39):
thankful to have our veryspecial guest here today, laura
Walton.
Thank you for being here.
Welcome to the show.
Yeah, hi, laura is yeah, we'rehappy to have you, laura, comes
from Grief on Purpose.
It's a revolution in how wenavigate the uncharted terrain
of loss.
So Grief on Purpose is amovement for those who carry
(01:01):
weight of grief, death or dying.
Her ultimate mission is toempower you not only to survive
but to thrive, which, of course,I love.
Laura and her team helpintegrate your grief as a
catalyst to a more powerful,purposeful and fulfilling life,
with both compassionate guidanceand support.
So we're going to jump right intoday.
So I know that you, laura, alltoo well.
(01:24):
You're very intimate with thedevastating effects of loss and
personal grief, so would youshare your story with us?
Speaker 2 (01:33):
Yeah, sure, so I do what I do essentially because of
my own personal experienceswith death, which what those
were for me was.
When I was 21, my dad committedsuicide and then, when I was 26
, my then boyfriend, slash bestfriend, died of a drug overdose
(01:57):
and I was just kind of leftfloundering.
It shattered my world,shattered everything I had known
thus far, and was leftfloundering trying to figure
this out, in a way where I justfelt very alone.
And so that was my motivation,my inspiration to eventually I
(02:17):
went to grad school and built amental health practice and then
built this other business.
So those situations were thecatalyst for all of what came
next.
Speaker 1 (02:29):
Yeah, I mean yeah, like you said, floundering.
You know it really is these twoimportant people in your life
that all of a sudden, withinfive years of each other, are
just gone.
I wondered you know, now thatyou're helping so many other
people, like, had you at thattime already sought any help, uh
, or like at what point did youkind of realize like that help
might be in your cards?
Speaker 2 (02:50):
I did.
I I feel like I sought outevery possible thing you could
imagine in those at least, let'ssay, the first handful of years
, um, following, um, myboyfriend's death, um, I sought
out professional therapy, Isought out yoga, I sought out
breath work.
I sought out all kinds ofthings and some situations and
(03:10):
some people I came across weregood and were helpful, but
unfortunately, the greaterexperience I had was that it
wasn't very helpful.
I wasn't able to find a lot ofsupport that felt really good
and that was also part of themotivation being that, as you
(03:31):
said at the beginning, we're allgoing to die at some point and
we're all going to face grief atsome point.
It's such a normal humanexperience.
I thought it was so mindblowing that there wasn't any
support out there for me yeah,with your yoga practice.
Speaker 1 (03:48):
I mean this.
What comes to mind when youjust said that was just thinking
about how other cultures lookat death and grief.
You know, I think, um, we're inamerica.
Were you in america at thistime?
yeah okay, um, because I I thinkthat that lens from which we
see this is like this uh, youknow, it's always negative.
I don't know that America eversees death as positive.
Yeah, and so and I'm not sayingwe have to just spin it that
(04:10):
way, but there are certaincultures that celebrate death in
different ways.
So I wasn't sure if you'dencountered any of that in your
training or in your experience.
Speaker 2 (04:18):
I kind of encountered that just in my own unofficial
research and you know, when theydied I didn't have a strong
backbone as far as a beliefsystem that was already in place
.
So I just kind of dove intoreading all the stuff I could
read about death and about griefand about dying and therefore
through that, yeah, I did gain alittle bit of a greater
(04:39):
understanding of how differentcultures experience it and that
broadened my perspective, Iguess, on maybe like what sorts
of beliefs were possible otherthan what's just sort of in our
face, in this country at least.
Speaker 1 (04:57):
Right, right, and yeah, in our body, like just
what's in your, you know, in ourbody this way.
So so grief, so grief onpurpose, so like literally born
out of death.
I mean, I think that that.
So it's a sort of beautiful,like lemonade at a lemon
situation, if you will, that younow are there for so many
people that need it.
Um, so tell us about how youcreated this space.
Speaker 2 (05:21):
Well, yeah, so I feel like there's a lot of layers to
this.
But, um, my, the yoga piececomes in first.
I had actually been practicingyoga.
Um, I think I startedpracticing very soon after my
dad's stuff, so this is 20 plusyears ago Um, and I had, um, I
(05:44):
had done a few yoga teachertrainings over the years, so had
a kind of a little bit morein-depth study into a practice
of yoga.
So that tool became my firsttool that I used personally as a
way of navigating and gettingto better understand and
(06:05):
learning how to be with my grief.
And I taught yoga a little bit,but it was more like for the
general public as opposed tolike specifically for like grief
or mental health.
And then I eventually decided Iwanted to go to grad school to
become a therapist, and so I didthat.
(06:27):
I, you know, as a therapistyeah, mental health professional
, you might know there's a lotof hours to complete, there's a
lot of hoops to jump through,you know.
Speaker 1 (06:37):
So that takes a lot of years, graduate credits to
complete and papers to write.
Speaker 2 (06:42):
So did all that and then started um, started my own
practice specializing in workingwith grief and trauma, um, and
did that for um, I don't, Idon't remember how many years,
but um, uh, a good handful ofyears.
And then I just I've, in themost recent couple of years, I
(07:06):
just started to feel like I'mkind of outgrowing the box of
that, the box of therapy, and,um, kind of wanting my reach to
be broader than it can be withina therapy practice, um, and so
that was the.
Those were the seeds, I think,of building grief on purpose and
(07:29):
just trying to again have amore broad reach and be able to
support people who maybe aren't,for whatever the reason is
seeking therapy.
But still, as we've said, griefis such a wide reaching topic.
So, yeah, so that's kind of all, what's led us here?
Speaker 1 (07:50):
So from what I'm hearing in that it's like this
blend of yoga that you maybetook your teacher training and
yoga teaching, cultivated ittowards a mental health and
grief focus and then with yourgraduate training in mental
health you then kind ofdeveloped this grief on purpose.
Speaker 2 (08:07):
Yeah, yeah, that's very fair to say, pulling from
all of those past trainings andthreads.
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (08:16):
I love that, I mean because it's so transformative.
I mean I think therapy, whendone well, is transformative.
You know yoga for sure.
I wonder what you think aboutthis.
Like, I also practice yoga andI practice Zen.
So I've been, I've beenmeditating for about 15 years,
studying with my teacher, andone of the things I found is
some of these yoga retreatswhich I love, and I love the
(08:38):
silent ones because as mentalhealth professionals, we're
constantly speaking.
Uh, my partner said this theother day.
He was like you speak too muchbecause my throat was sore and
that's what we do, but so, butwhat I find is sometimes with
these like yoga retreats, likethere's so much pain in people
that because I'm going to assumethat you're like an empath or
(08:58):
have empathic sort of tendencies, because we often do if we're
in this field so how do you likeas a teacher and do you have
that same experience where youkind of feel everyone's energy
and like everyone's there withtheir own pain when they're on
these like retreats and stuff?
Speaker 2 (09:13):
Yeah, I mean, yes, I do feel other people's energy.
I don't I actually don't knowthat I've.
I've done one yoga retreatthat's coming to mind but I
haven't done a ton of them andthat and that was uh that was
quite a few years ago, sospecifically within the context
of a yoga retreat.
I don't.
I don't have as much personalexperience there, but I could
see it cause you're opening up,you know everything, you're
(09:35):
getting into the body, you'removing that stored um emotion in
the body.
Speaker 1 (09:41):
Um, yeah.
Speaker 2 (09:42):
Right.
Speaker 1 (09:44):
So I mean, that's what made me think about it,
cause grief, like there'sprobably so many people that go
on these after a grief moment,like, like you said, dad
completing suicide thislong-term boyfriend overdosing.
You know, those lead people tothese journeys.
You know my goal and I love thatyou're trying to like reach
larger audience.
My goal is to like let's notwait for that.
Um well, my brother is in lawenforcement and I was, like
(10:05):
don't wait for a tragedy ortrauma to happen.
Go to therapy.
Like, so you have somebody thatyou can connect with, because
when the trauma happens, causeit will.
You'll then have a foundationthat's already there and then,
if you want to like process someof it, you can, but don't wait
until it's too late.
What?
Speaker 2 (10:20):
do you think?
Speaker 1 (10:20):
about that.
Speaker 2 (10:21):
Yeah, I agree, I think it's so.
If we have some basic tools inour tool belt, it's and yeah, as
you said, life is going tohappen.
Whether that's griefspecifically or not, it's going
to happen.
And to go into it a little bitprepared with these basic tools,
I think, can be really helpful.
I did not have that in my 20swhen my people died, and I think
(10:46):
that was part of the initialchallenge for me and just like I
didn't have one tool in my toolbelt, so I was floundering
there for a bit Totally.
Speaker 1 (10:57):
I'm glad you just said that because that was sort
of the question I was trying toask.
But I felt it was toojudgmental to ask it.
Because I was wondering becausein today's world so many people
have more tools Like I didn't.
Like you know, I workpredominantly in sports and
there was no one like me insports when I was an athlete,
you know, and the fact that Icould work in collegiate sports
(11:18):
and give these ladies and mentools at 18 years old, I'm like
God.
I would be annoyed if I heardme at 18, but I'd be thankful at
25 when I needed it.
Speaker 2 (11:29):
Yes, yeah, absolutely .
I think that's very similar forme that just the the, the time
of the world when I was 18 andin my earlier 20s was just so
much different than it is now.
We didn't have all the accessto the social media, which, um,
while you know, there's somethings I don't love about social
media.
There's a lot of tools that areavailable there, and even just
(11:52):
that, I think, is a step abovethen, what I had at that age.
Speaker 1 (12:00):
So what would listeners if they're like hey,
what is grief on purpose?
What would it look like if theywere signing up with you or
someone on your team becausethey were struggling in grief?
Speaker 2 (12:10):
Yeah, right now what it looks like is a lot of
self-led courses that have beencreated by me but inspired by
the decade plus of clinical workthat I've done and the kind of
common questions andmisunderstandings about both
(12:30):
grief and trauma that I've seencome up over the years, and so I
kind of compiled all of thatinto these self-led courses.
So there's that, and thenthere's a new coming soon April
1st, I believe, is the Grief onPurpose podcast.
Speaker 1 (12:49):
Nice.
Speaker 2 (12:50):
Yeah, so that will just be at least the way I'm
seeing that now is justconversations about death and
grief, just to normalize that asbeing something that we talk
about.
Yeah, and there's also a bookin the works, uh, that ties
together yoga and grief and kindof really breaks down what yoga
(13:12):
is and how the practices ofyoga apply to grief.
Speaker 1 (13:18):
Oh, I love that.
I can't wait to hear all thatCause it's like, like we've been
saying, it really is, you know,so important that people have
access to tools.
I'm sitting here thinking thatif I was a good podcast host, so
hopefully, um, yours uh will bea lot better than mine, uh.
But I'm sitting here thinking Iwould have probably had a dsm
diagnosis, because I know thatthere's like a.
(13:38):
I know that there's like aprolonged grief disorder.
Uh, I'm trying, but there's anadjustment disorder, because,
cause, which drives me insane,because adjustment disorders,
like you have six months to getover the situation.
You know, like, how did theycome up with six months If your
dad, your dad, completed suicide?
You have six months to get overthat, like come on.
Speaker 2 (13:58):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (13:59):
Yeah, yeah, there's a bereavement something.
Speaker 2 (14:03):
And then there's the newer one, which is the
prolonged, um, grief disorder,um, which, yeah, I agree it's an
arbitrary number, that thatyou're like, yeah, this is the
timeline by which you should beover it, and what does that even
mean to be over it?
Speaker 1 (14:17):
Um, and what does it in your experience?
What does it mean?
You know, I I often findclients are like when am I done?
And I'm like there's nocertificate.
It's not like you get a diplomaand you're done.
So, in your experience, when isit done?
Speaker 2 (14:31):
I don't think it's ever done, um, you're never done
grieving it.
But it will change, um, as timepasses and as your life changes
, it will change, but and Ithink some days you might call
that change good or better, andsome days you might call that
change worse.
It's just always going tochange, but it's never done or
gone, because, if you thinkabout it, there's always even 30
(14:54):
years pass.
Let's say, you hear a song thatreminds you of the person, or
you see somebody who looks justlike them, or you have a life
event, you get married or youhave a child, and that person's
no longer here to be a part ofthat.
There's always going to besomething that comes up in you
in response to that.
So that's always going to besome piece of the grief that is
(15:17):
still alive for you in thatmoment, and I actually think
that's pretty beautiful.
Speaker 1 (15:25):
I was just going to.
I was actually just thinkingthat, but we probably think
alike, so maybe that listenersmight not understand that.
So what?
Why do you think it like?
How would you explain whythat's beautiful?
Speaker 2 (15:36):
Ooh, um, because that person who died is, and I'll
say, the death and therefore thegrief that you experienced
changed you in a way, likeyou're never the same post-death
than you were pre-death.
And when you know, when theinitial fire from that kind of
(16:00):
dies down a little bit and years, a couple of years pass, let's
say, and you're, you're livingyour life, you're doing your
thing In my experience at least,you can lose touch a little bit
with how monumental that thingwas, that happened.
And so I think when you havethese things that remind you of
it, it pulls you right back intothat and it's like, oh yeah,
(16:23):
and you're in connection againwith that person and you're in
connection with with you, withthe way you might've felt when
you were at a more vulnerableplace.
And I think, yeah, I thinkthat's not something to be
afraid of or ashamed of or runaway from.
Maybe long winded answer, butwhat's beautiful about it is the
(16:45):
human sense of it.
Speaker 1 (16:48):
Not long-winded at all, thank you.
I mean because I think that'shelpful, because I work with a
lot of men and a lot of verymasculine heterosexual men and
you know they got the sunglasseson at a funeral, you know, and
you know when they first startcrying with whatever they cry
about in session, they're likesort of mortified that they're
doing it.
It's like no green light, youknow, like that's normal, that's
(17:12):
human.
Speaker 2 (17:12):
go ahead, go do it yeah, yeah, it's beautiful and I
like you know seeing that ingeneral, because it again it
shows that humanity um that weall share.
Okay.
Speaker 1 (17:25):
Left field question.
Sorry, this just popped in myhead.
I'm in New Jersey outside ofNew York and I love the Long
Island medium.
Speaker 2 (17:32):
Do you have?
Speaker 1 (17:33):
any opinion about that work or about any of that
that you're willing to share?
Speaker 2 (17:38):
I do yes, yeah, well, prior to my experiences with
death, that was just something Iwas always kind of curious
about and interested in, andI've done a few medium readings
over the years, some better thanothers or some that I guess not
better, but some that I feltlike resonated with me more than
others.
But I've had a couple mediumexperiences that were so
(18:03):
accurate that it was almostundeniable that this couldn't be
real.
It had to be real because theinformation that was coming
through was so 100% spot on andI also was so curious about it a
couple of years ago that I dida short mediumship course online
just to learn a little bitabout it.
(18:26):
And in a part of that was my ownpractice of doing that and and
so I did some practice readingson people and just having that
experience of being on the otherend of it and trying to pick,
you know, notice what, whatyou're picking up on, what the
intuition is, and then saying it, even though you're like
terrified that this is going tosound stupid because it's so out
(18:48):
of left field, and then to havepeople be like, oh my gosh,
that makes so much sense to me.
To be in that, on the otherside of that and have that, I
think was also a big shift forme.
And believing it because I knewthat I wasn't just making it up
, I was.
I was feeling certain thingsand they were accurate for those
people.
So I do believe in it.
Speaker 1 (19:10):
I love that.
Well, I do too.
So that's why I was, you know.
But you know, I think sometimes, as licensed professionals and
I think that's what you weregetting at like you're trying to
broaden your reach, which Ilove, and keep doing it because
we need to.
I mean, it's not like sittingone-on-one with the person.
That's beautiful, but it'slimiting, you know and it's
really limiting to our abilityto scale and just to really have
(19:31):
access to so people can suffera little less.
So so keep doing that and thankyou for for for that work that
you're doing.
Speaker 2 (19:38):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (19:38):
Thank you, all right, so what other?
What other advice would youhave for listeners who might be
in like a prolonged?
By the way, I just read thatthe DSM five, the prolonged
grief, is 12 months.
So you know, cool, sure.
Yeah is 12 months, so you know,cool Sure.
Speaker 2 (19:55):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (19:56):
It's so like so well, okay, sorry, let me take.
Let me take the cynicism out ofthis.
Listeners, if it's less than ormore than 12 months, that's
cool, like it's okay to to havegrief for us however long it is.
Uh, we have diagnoses, thatkind of help, re insurance pay
or other sort of issues that'sthere for.
But the truth is, yourexperience is far more powerful
(20:17):
than what a book is going totell me your diagnosis.
Is you with me on that, laura?
Speaker 2 (20:21):
Yes, absolutely.
Speaker 1 (20:23):
Okay, so what advice would you have for listeners
that maybe are just strugglingwith their grief?
Speaker 2 (20:33):
um, I think the first thing that's coming to mind is
the loving support to be with it, be with the grief, you know,
no matter what that looks like.
So, just so to allow ourselvesto sit with it, even if that's
just for literally a minute ortwo, but just sitting and kind
of feeling that grief.
(20:54):
Because, as you said, you weretalking about the heterosexual
males and their sunglasses.
They're not the only ones whoare so uncomfortable with
emotion in general, but withgrief too, grief specifically.
So for so many of us me too,I've been guilty of this.
(21:14):
But as soon as you feel it,you're like oh, let's go do
something else, let's get on myphone, let's have a drink, you
know, let's do whatever we cando to avoid this.
Speaker 1 (21:24):
Shut it down, shut it down.
Speaker 2 (21:26):
Yeah.
So even even if you do thething, so even if you're like
I'm going to grab my phone andscroll social media, fine, do it
.
But can you give yourself likea little buffer of a minute
before you do that and maybe sitwith that grief for a minute?
Then you can grab your phone ifyou still want to?
But building our tolerance Ithink to be able to sit with it
actually makes it easier in thelong run to to grieve, to be
(21:50):
with it in the long run to togrieve, to be with it.
Speaker 1 (21:56):
Yeah, that's great advice.
Uh, what about, like any storythat comes to mind of somebody
obviously de-identified?
Uh, or your own, about justsuccess, like sort of how this
helps to transform people?
Speaker 2 (22:05):
Um, yes, let's see.
Um, well, my, my own is comingto mine through the lens of yoga
.
Speaker 1 (22:14):
Let's do it.
Speaker 2 (22:16):
But not just the physical yoga, because
oftentimes when I say yoga,that's what people think I'm
talking about is the physicalpractice of yoga, the asana,
which is part of it, but there'sa lot more.
(22:39):
A yoga practice can teach ushow to be with what is, and how
to sit with something that'sreally uncomfortable is the
biggest thing.
Probably the biggest lessonthat I learned over the years
from my yoga practice,specifically as it relates to
grief, is how to be withsomething really uncomfortable,
(22:59):
and so learning how to sit this,I'm realizing right now, ties
back to what I just said, butlearning how to sit with the
discomfort, sit with what is thereality of what is for me, that
was that, was the game changer,that was what made that's
probably the reason why I'm hereright now the rate, the reason
I was able to do something withmy grief as opposed to kind of
(23:24):
drowning in it.
Speaker 1 (23:26):
Yeah, it's a, it's a really inspirational story that
I know that it's helpinglisteners.
You know, hear, hear that sideof it.
So, uh, I'm not going to putyou in a spot, but there's five
actionable steps that you'vecome up with and that they're
really good takeaways.
Uh, for people to managepersonal grief.
Uh, we're going to put them inthe show notes uh, but you know,
if you want to walk us throughsome right now, or what that
(23:48):
looks like.
Speaker 2 (23:49):
Yeah Well, you won't be surprised to hear that the
first one is do nothing.
So, as we've already talkedabout, kind of, instead of
avoiding sitting with that grief, um.
Then there's movement, uh, sothings that kind of relate to,
like, our physiological body, um, that that can help to, um, get
(24:13):
us out of the fight or flightmode that we might be in with
grief.
So movement, eating nutritiousfoods, drinking water, these are
really simple things, butthey're also things that are
really easy to lose when we'regrieving and that are more or
less within our control, andsomething that we can fairly
(24:35):
simply change Connection,connection, connection with a
friend or relative, therapist,anybody really, but just
connection, because grief canfeel so, so, so lonely and
isolating, so lonely, yeah.
And then one of my favoritethings to do because people
(24:57):
often ask, especially if it'slike a birthday or an
anniversary coming up, like whatcan I, what should I do?
How should I acknowledge thisday?
One of my favorite answers tothat question is doing something
nice for somebody else, andmaybe even better, anonymously.
So that could look like amillion different things you buy
(25:20):
the coffee for the personbehind you in line.
You pay for somebody's lunch,you donate to a charity that was
meaningful to your person,whatever, but doing something
nice for somebody else, not onlyis it nice, but it gets us out
of our little grief bubble foreven just a couple minutes, and
(25:43):
that can again be helpful, justbecause it's so easy to get
stuck there.
Speaker 1 (25:48):
I think people want to be stuck there.
I think people want to be stuckthere and I don't mean to say
that provocatively, but I'veheard people say like I feel
guilty or shame when I start tofeel joy post-death.
Speaker 2 (25:58):
Yeah, and so how do you help people through that?
Just normalizing the likethat's normal to feel that,
because it can be such a hardconcept to wrap our minds around
(26:18):
.
How can I possibly be joyful orhappy if this person is no
longer alive, right?
So it's super normal to feelthat and that's okay to feel
that.
I think people feel that.
But then there's a layer ofshame on top of that, like maybe
I shouldn't be feeling this, um, and so just acknowledging that
you feel that and that's okay,um, sometimes even just that
(26:42):
really, I've seen that.
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (26:45):
Yeah, just that, normalization, the validation.
Speaker 2 (26:46):
I've seen that sometimes with, like.
Speaker 1 (26:48):
You know, parents that lose a child.
You know that's always they.
They feel like they should liketheir life should go on.
You know parents that lose achild.
You know that's always.
They feel like they should liketheir life should go on.
You know why?
Wasn't it them versus the child?
Yeah, there's no.
It's really hard to have ananswer to that, you know.
So there's not really an answerto that.
Speaker 2 (27:01):
Yeah, there's not an answer to it, and that's
sometimes the hard part issitting with the no answer Right
.
Speaker 1 (27:06):
That's right.
Speaker 2 (27:07):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (27:08):
We always say in Zen it's the unknowing, you know.
It's a letting go of knowing.
Speaker 2 (27:12):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (27:13):
Laura, this was great .
You know tough topic, deeptopic, but I really appreciate
your insights and your.
You know your compassion andwhat you bring to this, and so
thank you for helping so manypeople through their grief.
Where can people find you?
Speaker 2 (27:27):
Yeah, my website is griefonpurposecom.
And then on social media, um,so instagram, um and facebook,
it's grief dot on dot purposenice.
Speaker 1 (27:39):
so grief on purpose, check it out, uh, laura, laura
walton, and there's gonna be abook and a podcast and so maybe
I'll be, maybe you'll have me onand I could talk about some.
I remember my first griefexperience, like post zen Zen
training, uh, because I feltlike I wasn't supposed to feel
sadness, like the intellectualme was like no, I have
non-attachment, I've done thework.
I sit hours and days and uh,yeah, it was really a cool
(28:04):
experience actually.
Speaker 2 (28:06):
So maybe you'll have me on and I can share that.
Yeah, I'd love to talk moreabout that.
I'll be in touch.
Speaker 1 (28:12):
All right, I was in the back of the of the of the
church with my sunglasses on,just for for everyone to know.
But hey, Laura, really Iappreciate you being here today.
I've no doubt that there'sseveral listeners who are
struggling with grief andthey're thankful for your
guidance today.
Really, really, really, reallyappreciate you and for listeners
, thanks for always tuning inand, as always, please like,
(28:34):
follow and share wherever youare on your social channels.
We will see you here next weekand until then, spread a little
kindness and stay well, Thankyou.
Hello, welcome back to On Air with Dr Pete.
As you know, we try and bringyou many different topics of
discussion.
Some are happy, some areinteresting and some are sad,
and today's topic, although notalways pleasant, it's important
in a heavier conversationrelated to grief.
If you're a human, then youmost certainly have faced grief
and, as mental healthprofessionals, we're going to
bring you some insight into thattoday, and that's why I'm so
(00:39):
thankful to have our veryspecial guest here today, laura
Walton.
Thank you for being here.
Welcome to the show.
Yeah, hi, laura is yeah, we'rehappy to have you, laura, comes
from Grief on Purpose.
It's a revolution in how wenavigate the uncharted terrain
of loss.
So Grief on Purpose is amovement for those who carry
(01:01):
weight of grief, death or dying.
Her ultimate mission is toempower you not only to survive
but to thrive, which, of course,I love.
Laura and her team helpintegrate your grief as a
catalyst to a more powerful,purposeful and fulfilling life,
with both compassionate guidanceand support.
So we're going to jump right intoday.
So I know that you, laura, alltoo well.
(01:24):
You're very intimate with thedevastating effects of loss and
personal grief, so would youshare your story with us?
Speaker 2 (01:33):
Yeah, sure, so I do what I do essentially because of
my own personal experienceswith death, which what those
were for me was.
When I was 21, my dad committedsuicide and then, when I was 26
, my then boyfriend, slash bestfriend, died of a drug overdose
(01:57):
and I was just kind of leftfloundering.
It shattered my world,shattered everything I had known
thus far, and was leftfloundering trying to figure
this out, in a way where I justfelt very alone.
And so that was my motivation,my inspiration to eventually I
(02:17):
went to grad school and built amental health practice and then
built this other business.
So those situations were thecatalyst for all of what came
next.
Speaker 1 (02:29):
Yeah, I mean yeah, like you said, floundering.
You know it really is these twoimportant people in your life
that all of a sudden, withinfive years of each other, are
just gone.
I wondered you know, now thatyou're helping so many other
people, like, had you at thattime already sought any help, uh
, or like at what point did youkind of realize like that help
might be in your cards?
Speaker 2 (02:50):
I did.
I I feel like I sought outevery possible thing you could
imagine in those at least, let'ssay, the first handful of years
, um, following, um, myboyfriend's death, um, I sought
out professional therapy, Isought out yoga, I sought out
breath work.
I sought out all kinds ofthings and some situations and
(03:10):
some people I came across weregood and were helpful, but
unfortunately, the greaterexperience I had was that it
wasn't very helpful.
I wasn't able to find a lot ofsupport that felt really good
and that was also part of themotivation being that, as you
(03:31):
said at the beginning, we're allgoing to die at some point and
we're all going to face grief atsome point.
It's such a normal humanexperience.
I thought it was so mindblowing that there wasn't any
support out there for me yeah,with your yoga practice.
Speaker 1 (03:48):
I mean this.
What comes to mind when youjust said that was just thinking
about how other cultures lookat death and grief.
You know, I think, um, we're inamerica.
Were you in america at thistime?
yeah okay, um, because I I thinkthat that lens from which we
see this is like this uh, youknow, it's always negative.
I don't know that America eversees death as positive.
Yeah, and so and I'm not sayingwe have to just spin it that
(04:10):
way, but there are certaincultures that celebrate death in
different ways.
So I wasn't sure if you'dencountered any of that in your
training or in your experience.
Speaker 2 (04:18):
I kind of encountered that just in my own unofficial
research and you know, when theydied I didn't have a strong
backbone as far as a beliefsystem that was already in place
.
So I just kind of dove intoreading all the stuff I could
read about death and about griefand about dying and therefore
through that, yeah, I did gain alittle bit of a greater
(04:39):
understanding of how differentcultures experience it and that
broadened my perspective, Iguess, on maybe like what sorts
of beliefs were possible otherthan what's just sort of in our
face, in this country at least.
Speaker 1 (04:57):
Right, right, and yeah, in our body, like just
what's in your, you know, in ourbody this way.
So so grief, so grief onpurpose, so like literally born
out of death.
I mean, I think that that.
So it's a sort of beautiful,like lemonade at a lemon
situation, if you will, that younow are there for so many
people that need it.
Um, so tell us about how youcreated this space.
Speaker 2 (05:21):
Well, yeah, so I feel like there's a lot of layers to
this.
But, um, my, the yoga piececomes in first.
I had actually been practicingyoga.
Um, I think I startedpracticing very soon after my
dad's stuff, so this is 20 plusyears ago Um, and I had, um, I
(05:44):
had done a few yoga teachertrainings over the years, so had
a kind of a little bit morein-depth study into a practice
of yoga.
So that tool became my firsttool that I used personally as a
way of navigating and gettingto better understand and
(06:05):
learning how to be with my grief.
And I taught yoga a little bit,but it was more like for the
general public as opposed tolike specifically for like grief
or mental health.
And then I eventually decided Iwanted to go to grad school to
become a therapist, and so I didthat.
(06:27):
I, you know, as a therapistyeah, mental health professional
, you might know there's a lotof hours to complete, there's a
lot of hoops to jump through,you know.
Speaker 1 (06:37):
So that takes a lot of years, graduate credits to
complete and papers to write.
Speaker 2 (06:42):
So did all that and then started um, started my own
practice specializing in workingwith grief and trauma, um, and
did that for um, I don't, Idon't remember how many years,
but um, uh, a good handful ofyears.
And then I just I've, in themost recent couple of years, I
(07:06):
just started to feel like I'mkind of outgrowing the box of
that, the box of therapy, and,um, kind of wanting my reach to
be broader than it can be withina therapy practice, um, and so
that was the.
Those were the seeds, I think,of building grief on purpose and
(07:29):
just trying to again have amore broad reach and be able to
support people who maybe aren't,for whatever the reason is
seeking therapy.
But still, as we've said, griefis such a wide reaching topic.
So, yeah, so that's kind of all, what's led us here?
Speaker 1 (07:50):
So from what I'm hearing in that it's like this
blend of yoga that you maybetook your teacher training and
yoga teaching, cultivated ittowards a mental health and
grief focus and then with yourgraduate training in mental
health you then kind ofdeveloped this grief on purpose.
Speaker 2 (08:07):
Yeah, yeah, that's very fair to say, pulling from
all of those past trainings andthreads.
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (08:16):
I love that, I mean because it's so transformative.
I mean I think therapy, whendone well, is transformative.
You know yoga for sure.
I wonder what you think aboutthis.
Like, I also practice yoga andI practice Zen.
So I've been, I've beenmeditating for about 15 years,
studying with my teacher, andone of the things I found is
some of these yoga retreatswhich I love, and I love the
(08:38):
silent ones because as mentalhealth professionals, we're
constantly speaking.
Uh, my partner said this theother day.
He was like you speak too muchbecause my throat was sore and
that's what we do, but so, butwhat I find is sometimes with
these like yoga retreats, likethere's so much pain in people
that because I'm going to assumethat you're like an empath or
(08:58):
have empathic sort of tendencies, because we often do if we're
in this field so how do you likeas a teacher and do you have
that same experience where youkind of feel everyone's energy
and like everyone's there withtheir own pain when they're on
these like retreats and stuff?
Speaker 2 (09:13):
Yeah, I mean, yes, I do feel other people's energy.
I don't I actually don't knowthat I've.
I've done one yoga retreatthat's coming to mind but I
haven't done a ton of them andthat and that was uh that was
quite a few years ago, sospecifically within the context
of a yoga retreat.
I don't.
I don't have as much personalexperience there, but I could
see it cause you're opening up,you know everything, you're
(09:35):
getting into the body, you'removing that stored um emotion in
the body.
Speaker 1 (09:41):
Um, yeah.
Speaker 2 (09:42):
Right.
Speaker 1 (09:44):
So I mean, that's what made me think about it,
cause grief, like there'sprobably so many people that go
on these after a grief moment,like, like you said, dad
completing suicide thislong-term boyfriend overdosing.
You know, those lead people tothese journeys.
You know my goal and I love thatyou're trying to like reach
larger audience.
My goal is to like let's notwait for that.
Um well, my brother is in lawenforcement and I was, like
(10:05):
don't wait for a tragedy ortrauma to happen.
Go to therapy.
Like, so you have somebody thatyou can connect with, because
when the trauma happens, causeit will.
You'll then have a foundationthat's already there and then,
if you want to like process someof it, you can, but don't wait
until it's too late.
What?
Speaker 2 (10:20):
do you think?
Speaker 1 (10:20):
about that.
Speaker 2 (10:21):
Yeah, I agree, I think it's so.
If we have some basic tools inour tool belt, it's and yeah, as
you said, life is going tohappen.
Whether that's griefspecifically or not, it's going
to happen.
And to go into it a little bitprepared with these basic tools,
I think, can be really helpful.
I did not have that in my 20swhen my people died, and I think
(10:46):
that was part of the initialchallenge for me and just like I
didn't have one tool in my toolbelt, so I was floundering
there for a bit Totally.
Speaker 1 (10:57):
I'm glad you just said that because that was sort
of the question I was trying toask.
But I felt it was toojudgmental to ask it.
Because I was wondering becausein today's world so many people
have more tools Like I didn't.
Like you know, I workpredominantly in sports and
there was no one like me insports when I was an athlete,
you know, and the fact that Icould work in collegiate sports
(11:18):
and give these ladies and mentools at 18 years old, I'm like
God.
I would be annoyed if I heardme at 18, but I'd be thankful at
25 when I needed it.
Speaker 2 (11:29):
Yes, yeah, absolutely .
I think that's very similar forme that just the the, the time
of the world when I was 18 andin my earlier 20s was just so
much different than it is now.
We didn't have all the accessto the social media, which, um,
while you know, there's somethings I don't love about social
media.
There's a lot of tools that areavailable there, and even just
(11:52):
that, I think, is a step abovethen, what I had at that age.
Speaker 1 (12:00):
So what would listeners if they're like hey,
what is grief on purpose?
What would it look like if theywere signing up with you or
someone on your team becausethey were struggling in grief?
Speaker 2 (12:10):
Yeah, right now what it looks like is a lot of
self-led courses that have beencreated by me but inspired by
the decade plus of clinical workthat I've done and the kind of
common questions andmisunderstandings about both
(12:30):
grief and trauma that I've seencome up over the years, and so I
kind of compiled all of thatinto these self-led courses.
So there's that, and thenthere's a new coming soon April
1st, I believe, is the Grief onPurpose podcast.
Speaker 1 (12:49):
Nice.
Speaker 2 (12:50):
Yeah, so that will just be at least the way I'm
seeing that now is justconversations about death and
grief, just to normalize that asbeing something that we talk
about.
Yeah, and there's also a bookin the works, uh, that ties
together yoga and grief and kindof really breaks down what yoga
(13:12):
is and how the practices ofyoga apply to grief.
Speaker 1 (13:18):
Oh, I love that.
I can't wait to hear all thatCause it's like, like we've been
saying, it really is, you know,so important that people have
access to tools.
I'm sitting here thinking thatif I was a good podcast host, so
hopefully, um, yours uh will bea lot better than mine, uh.
But I'm sitting here thinking Iwould have probably had a dsm
diagnosis, because I know thatthere's like a.
(13:38):
I know that there's like aprolonged grief disorder.
Uh, I'm trying, but there's anadjustment disorder, because,
cause, which drives me insane,because adjustment disorders,
like you have six months to getover the situation.
You know, like, how did theycome up with six months If your
dad, your dad, completed suicide?
You have six months to get overthat, like come on.
Speaker 2 (13:58):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (13:59):
Yeah, yeah, there's a bereavement something.
Speaker 2 (14:03):
And then there's the newer one, which is the
prolonged, um, grief disorder,um, which, yeah, I agree it's an
arbitrary number, that thatyou're like, yeah, this is the
timeline by which you should beover it, and what does that even
mean to be over it?
Speaker 1 (14:17):
Um, and what does it in your experience?
What does it mean?
You know, I I often findclients are like when am I done?
And I'm like there's nocertificate.
It's not like you get a diplomaand you're done.
So, in your experience, when isit done?
Speaker 2 (14:31):
I don't think it's ever done, um, you're never done
grieving it.
But it will change, um, as timepasses and as your life changes
, it will change, but and Ithink some days you might call
that change good or better, andsome days you might call that
change worse.
It's just always going tochange, but it's never done or
gone, because, if you thinkabout it, there's always even 30
(14:54):
years pass.
Let's say, you hear a song thatreminds you of the person, or
you see somebody who looks justlike them, or you have a life
event, you get married or youhave a child, and that person's
no longer here to be a part ofthat.
There's always going to besomething that comes up in you
in response to that.
So that's always going to besome piece of the grief that is
(15:17):
still alive for you in thatmoment, and I actually think
that's pretty beautiful.
Speaker 1 (15:25):
I was just going to.
I was actually just thinkingthat, but we probably think
alike, so maybe that listenersmight not understand that.
So what?
Why do you think it like?
How would you explain whythat's beautiful?
Speaker 2 (15:36):
Ooh, um, because that person who died is, and I'll
say, the death and therefore thegrief that you experienced
changed you in a way, likeyou're never the same post-death
than you were pre-death.
And when you know, when theinitial fire from that kind of
(16:00):
dies down a little bit and years, a couple of years pass, let's
say, and you're, you're livingyour life, you're doing your
thing In my experience at least,you can lose touch a little bit
with how monumental that thingwas, that happened.
And so I think when you havethese things that remind you of
it, it pulls you right back intothat and it's like, oh yeah,
(16:23):
and you're in connection againwith that person and you're in
connection with with you, withthe way you might've felt when
you were at a more vulnerableplace.
And I think, yeah, I thinkthat's not something to be
afraid of or ashamed of or runaway from.
Maybe long winded answer, butwhat's beautiful about it is the
(16:45):
human sense of it.
Speaker 1 (16:48):
Not long-winded at all, thank you.
I mean because I think that'shelpful, because I work with a
lot of men and a lot of verymasculine heterosexual men and
you know they got the sunglasseson at a funeral, you know, and
you know when they first startcrying with whatever they cry
about in session, they're likesort of mortified that they're
doing it.
It's like no green light, youknow, like that's normal, that's
(17:12):
human.
Speaker 2 (17:12):
go ahead, go do it yeah, yeah, it's beautiful and I
like you know seeing that ingeneral, because it again it
shows that humanity um that weall share.
Okay.
Speaker 1 (17:25):
Left field question.
Sorry, this just popped in myhead.
I'm in New Jersey outside ofNew York and I love the Long
Island medium.
Speaker 2 (17:32):
Do you have?
Speaker 1 (17:33):
any opinion about that work or about any of that
that you're willing to share?
Speaker 2 (17:38):
I do yes, yeah, well, prior to my experiences with
death, that was just something Iwas always kind of curious
about and interested in, andI've done a few medium readings
over the years, some better thanothers or some that I guess not
better, but some that I feltlike resonated with me more than
others.
But I've had a couple mediumexperiences that were so
(18:03):
accurate that it was almostundeniable that this couldn't be
real.
It had to be real because theinformation that was coming
through was so 100% spot on andI also was so curious about it a
couple of years ago that I dida short mediumship course online
just to learn a little bitabout it.
(18:26):
And in a part of that was my ownpractice of doing that and and
so I did some practice readingson people and just having that
experience of being on the otherend of it and trying to pick,
you know, notice what, whatyou're picking up on, what the
intuition is, and then saying it, even though you're like
terrified that this is going tosound stupid because it's so out
(18:48):
of left field, and then to havepeople be like, oh my gosh,
that makes so much sense to me.
To be in that, on the otherside of that and have that, I
think was also a big shift forme.
And believing it because I knewthat I wasn't just making it up
, I was.
I was feeling certain thingsand they were accurate for those
people.
So I do believe in it.
Speaker 1 (19:10):
I love that.
Well, I do too.
So that's why I was, you know.
But you know, I think sometimes, as licensed professionals and
I think that's what you weregetting at like you're trying to
broaden your reach, which Ilove, and keep doing it because
we need to.
I mean, it's not like sittingone-on-one with the person.
That's beautiful, but it'slimiting, you know and it's
really limiting to our abilityto scale and just to really have
(19:31):
access to so people can suffera little less.
So so keep doing that and thankyou for for for that work that
you're doing.
Speaker 2 (19:38):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (19:38):
Thank you, all right, so what other?
What other advice would youhave for listeners who might be
in like a prolonged?
By the way, I just read thatthe DSM five, the prolonged
grief, is 12 months.
So you know, cool, sure.
Yeah is 12 months, so you know,cool Sure.
Speaker 2 (19:55):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (19:56):
It's so like so well, okay, sorry, let me take.
Let me take the cynicism out ofthis.
Listeners, if it's less than ormore than 12 months, that's
cool, like it's okay to to havegrief for us however long it is.
Uh, we have diagnoses, thatkind of help, re insurance pay
or other sort of issues that'sthere for.
But the truth is, yourexperience is far more powerful
(20:17):
than what a book is going totell me your diagnosis.
Is you with me on that, laura?
Speaker 2 (20:21):
Yes, absolutely.
Speaker 1 (20:23):
Okay, so what advice would you have for listeners
that maybe are just strugglingwith their grief?
Speaker 2 (20:33):
um, I think the first thing that's coming to mind is
the loving support to be with it, be with the grief, you know,
no matter what that looks like.
So, just so to allow ourselvesto sit with it, even if that's
just for literally a minute ortwo, but just sitting and kind
of feeling that grief.
(20:54):
Because, as you said, you weretalking about the heterosexual
males and their sunglasses.
They're not the only ones whoare so uncomfortable with
emotion in general, but withgrief too, grief specifically.
So for so many of us me too,I've been guilty of this.
(21:14):
But as soon as you feel it,you're like oh, let's go do
something else, let's get on myphone, let's have a drink, you
know, let's do whatever we cando to avoid this.
Speaker 1 (21:24):
Shut it down, shut it down.
Speaker 2 (21:26):
Yeah.
So even even if you do thething, so even if you're like
I'm going to grab my phone andscroll social media, fine, do it
.
But can you give yourself likea little buffer of a minute
before you do that and maybe sitwith that grief for a minute?
Then you can grab your phone ifyou still want to?
But building our tolerance Ithink to be able to sit with it
actually makes it easier in thelong run to to grieve, to be
(21:50):
with it in the long run to togrieve, to be with it.
Speaker 1 (21:56):
Yeah, that's great advice.
Uh, what about, like any storythat comes to mind of somebody
obviously de-identified?
Uh, or your own, about justsuccess, like sort of how this
helps to transform people?
Speaker 2 (22:05):
Um, yes, let's see.
Um, well, my, my own is comingto mine through the lens of yoga
.
Speaker 1 (22:14):
Let's do it.
Speaker 2 (22:16):
But not just the physical yoga, because
oftentimes when I say yoga,that's what people think I'm
talking about is the physicalpractice of yoga, the asana,
which is part of it, but there'sa lot more.
(22:39):
A yoga practice can teach ushow to be with what is, and how
to sit with something that'sreally uncomfortable is the
biggest thing.
Probably the biggest lessonthat I learned over the years
from my yoga practice,specifically as it relates to
grief, is how to be withsomething really uncomfortable,
(22:59):
and so learning how to sit this,I'm realizing right now, ties
back to what I just said, butlearning how to sit with the
discomfort, sit with what is thereality of what is for me, that
was that, was the game changer,that was what made that's
probably the reason why I'm hereright now the rate, the reason
I was able to do something withmy grief as opposed to kind of
(23:24):
drowning in it.
Speaker 1 (23:26):
Yeah, it's a, it's a really inspirational story that
I know that it's helpinglisteners.
You know, hear, hear that sideof it.
So, uh, I'm not going to putyou in a spot, but there's five
actionable steps that you'vecome up with and that they're
really good takeaways.
Uh, for people to managepersonal grief.
Uh, we're going to put them inthe show notes uh, but you know,
if you want to walk us throughsome right now, or what that
(23:48):
looks like.
Speaker 2 (23:49):
Yeah Well, you won't be surprised to hear that the
first one is do nothing.
So, as we've already talkedabout, kind of, instead of
avoiding sitting with that grief, um.
Then there's movement, uh, sothings that kind of relate to,
like, our physiological body, um, that that can help to, um, get
(24:13):
us out of the fight or flightmode that we might be in with
grief.
So movement, eating nutritiousfoods, drinking water, these are
really simple things, butthey're also things that are
really easy to lose when we'regrieving and that are more or
less within our control, andsomething that we can fairly
(24:35):
simply change Connection,connection, connection with a
friend or relative, therapist,anybody really, but just
connection, because grief canfeel so, so, so lonely and
isolating, so lonely, yeah.
And then one of my favoritethings to do because people
(24:57):
often ask, especially if it'slike a birthday or an
anniversary coming up, like whatcan I, what should I do?
How should I acknowledge thisday?
One of my favorite answers tothat question is doing something
nice for somebody else, andmaybe even better, anonymously.
So that could look like amillion different things you buy
(25:20):
the coffee for the personbehind you in line.
You pay for somebody's lunch,you donate to a charity that was
meaningful to your person,whatever, but doing something
nice for somebody else, not onlyis it nice, but it gets us out
of our little grief bubble foreven just a couple minutes, and
(25:43):
that can again be helpful, justbecause it's so easy to get
stuck there.
Speaker 1 (25:48):
I think people want to be stuck there.
I think people want to be stuckthere and I don't mean to say
that provocatively, but I'veheard people say like I feel
guilty or shame when I start tofeel joy post-death.
Speaker 2 (25:58):
Yeah, and so how do you help people through that?
Just normalizing the likethat's normal to feel that,
because it can be such a hardconcept to wrap our minds around
(26:18):
.
How can I possibly be joyful orhappy if this person is no
longer alive, right?
So it's super normal to feelthat and that's okay to feel
that.
I think people feel that.
But then there's a layer ofshame on top of that, like maybe
I shouldn't be feeling this, um, and so just acknowledging that
you feel that and that's okay,um, sometimes even just that
(26:42):
really, I've seen that.
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (26:45):
Yeah, just that, normalization, the validation.
Speaker 2 (26:46):
I've seen that sometimes with, like.
Speaker 1 (26:48):
You know, parents that lose a child.
You know that's always they.
They feel like they should liketheir life should go on.
You know parents that lose achild.
You know that's always.
They feel like they should liketheir life should go on.
You know why?
Wasn't it them versus the child?
Yeah, there's no.
It's really hard to have ananswer to that, you know.
So there's not really an answerto that.
Speaker 2 (27:01):
Yeah, there's not an answer to it, and that's
sometimes the hard part issitting with the no answer Right
.
Speaker 1 (27:06):
That's right.
Speaker 2 (27:07):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (27:08):
We always say in Zen it's the unknowing, you know.
It's a letting go of knowing.
Speaker 2 (27:12):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (27:13):
Laura, this was great .
You know tough topic, deeptopic, but I really appreciate
your insights and your.
You know your compassion andwhat you bring to this, and so
thank you for helping so manypeople through their grief.
Where can people find you?
Speaker 2 (27:27):
Yeah, my website is griefonpurposecom.
And then on social media, um,so instagram, um and facebook,
it's grief dot on dot purposenice.
Speaker 1 (27:39):
so grief on purpose, check it out, uh, laura, laura
walton, and there's gonna be abook and a podcast and so maybe
I'll be, maybe you'll have me onand I could talk about some.
I remember my first griefexperience, like post zen Zen
training, uh, because I feltlike I wasn't supposed to feel
sadness, like the intellectualme was like no, I have
non-attachment, I've done thework.
I sit hours and days and uh,yeah, it was really a cool
(28:04):
experience actually.
Speaker 2 (28:06):
So maybe you'll have me on and I can share that.
Yeah, I'd love to talk moreabout that.
I'll be in touch.
Speaker 1 (28:12):
All right, I was in the back of the of the of the
church with my sunglasses on,just for for everyone to know.
But hey, Laura, really Iappreciate you being here today.
I've no doubt that there'sseveral listeners who are
struggling with grief andthey're thankful for your
guidance today.
Really, really, really, reallyappreciate you and for listeners
, thanks for always tuning inand, as always, please like,
(28:34):
follow and share wherever youare on your social channels.
We will see you here next weekand until then, spread a little
kindness and stay well, Thankyou.
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