August 5, 2025 • 28 mins
A sitcom following the life of a witty high school English teacher and her students, balancing educational chaos with clever humor. It’s beloved for its sharp writing and charm.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Ham Olive soap Your Beauty Hope and bluster Cream Campoo
for soft, glamorous carossible hair. Bring You Our Miss Brooks
starring Eve arden All in this book, who teaches English
at Madison High School, has always tried to get along
with her fellow faculty members, regardless of whether they're male
(00:23):
or female.
Speaker 2 (00:24):
One thing that school teachers of either sex have in
common is the fact that he, she or them was
is an r underpaid. But there is one definite advantage
held by the men. When a male school teacher hasn't
enough money to go to the movies, he can stay
home and look at the pictures on his Esquire calendar.
I've overcome that advantage to some slight extent by making
(00:46):
my own calendar. I've used twelve snapshots, one for each
month of Madison's Bashful biologist Philip Boyntman. There they are
right on my bedroom wall. January mister Boynton, and is
up to the minute raccoon coat. February mister Boynton on
Valentine's Day with a big red heart shaped box under
(01:09):
his arm containing flies for his frog McDougall. Then March
mister Boynton in plus fours a stripe blazer and a
three propeller beanie. Last Friday morning, when I tore the
page for March off my calendar, there was mister Boynton
with his arms around me, so I knew it was
(01:30):
April Fool's Day. My Landlady, Missus Davis knocked on my
door a moment later. Come in.
Speaker 3 (01:38):
Good morning, Connie, many happy weekends at the game.
Speaker 2 (01:41):
Thanks Missus Davis. Happy April Fool's Day to you. Four time?
Is it anyway? I'm still sleepy.
Speaker 3 (01:48):
It's almost seven, Connie. I'd been up for hours planning
to build creeks to play on people.
Speaker 2 (01:53):
Well, I hope you're not going to be as naughty
as you were last year, setting fire crackers off in
our yard to make everybody think it was fourth of July.
Speaker 4 (02:02):
But that was fun, wasn't it.
Speaker 2 (02:04):
Yes, until one of your pin wheels joined me in
the shower.
Speaker 3 (02:09):
Let's see now, I came up here to tell you
something rather important.
Speaker 4 (02:13):
Oh dear me.
Speaker 3 (02:14):
Whenever I talked to my sister Angela, I become almost
as absent minded as she is. We had quite a
conversation on the phone this morning.
Speaker 2 (02:21):
How is Angela fine?
Speaker 4 (02:23):
Thank you?
Speaker 3 (02:24):
But she's so flighty fy right in the middle of
our telephone conversation. She forgot that she was talking about completely.
I'm worried about her. It's like I was telling my
brother the other day, We've got to do something.
Speaker 2 (02:37):
I said, You've got to do something about what. I
was just repeating what you said to your brother.
Speaker 4 (02:46):
Which brother.
Speaker 2 (02:52):
I don't know, your brother, Victor. I guess, I guess so.
Speaker 5 (02:55):
Well, it's a.
Speaker 4 (02:59):
Beautiful hey, Missus Davis.
Speaker 2 (03:01):
You came in here to tell me something. I try
and remember what it was so I can take a
shower and get dressed and forget about it. Oh.
Speaker 3 (03:08):
Yes, one of your students is reading for you in
the living room.
Speaker 2 (03:11):
Walter Dington, Walter Dentton. What's he doing here so early?
Speaker 4 (03:15):
All right, Connie, I'll tell him.
Speaker 6 (03:17):
But what.
Speaker 7 (03:20):
Poor thing?
Speaker 3 (03:20):
She's got so much on her mind she can't concentrate.
Speaker 7 (03:23):
Hi, Missus Davis, Walter.
Speaker 4 (03:25):
What are you doing here?
Speaker 3 (03:27):
You just love me here, Missus Davis, when you went
in to see Miss Brooks.
Speaker 4 (03:30):
Oh, that reminds me. What are you doing here so early?
Speaker 7 (03:34):
Well, it's a big secret, Missus Davis.
Speaker 3 (03:36):
But I'll tell you if you promise to keep it
strictly confidential. I promise you won't forget now. I won't
forget what now? To keep it confidential, to keep worth confidential,
I guess it's safe with you. Look at this newspaper column, the.
Speaker 5 (03:55):
One called Dorothy Day's Daily.
Speaker 7 (03:57):
Advice to the Heartsore.
Speaker 4 (03:59):
Oh, I be that all the time.
Speaker 3 (04:01):
You never read a letter like this one, though, I'll
bet listen, dear Dorothy Daily. I teach English in high school,
but my chief interest lies in the fellow teacher of
the opposite sex, whose initials are PEB. No matter how
I try, I can't seem to make any progress with him.
I'm attractive without being ravishing, intelligent without being stuffy, cheerful,
(04:22):
without being a Pollyanna. But mostly I'm without PEB. Can
you help me sign CB? Where I certainly sympathize with
that young lady. But to now, wait a minute, Hannie
Brooks Walter, do you think the CB in this letter
could be the CB? I think the CB could be.
Speaker 2 (04:43):
I'm positive it is.
Speaker 3 (04:44):
Look who she's stuck on, PEB, Philip pointon Walter. PEB
could stand for anybody. Why it could stand for Paul Bunyon.
Missus Davis, you're closer to Miss Brooks than any of us.
Does she know anybody named Paul?
Speaker 4 (05:00):
No, not that I know. Love.
Speaker 6 (05:02):
Then there you are.
Speaker 7 (05:03):
She's got to be CB.
Speaker 3 (05:05):
But Balter, can you honestly think Miss Brooks would write
a letter like this to a public newspaper? For sure,
missus Davis, haven't you heard the famous epigram love and
its desperation turns to many strange devices?
Speaker 2 (05:20):
No longer who.
Speaker 7 (05:21):
Said that I did?
Speaker 2 (05:24):
Well?
Speaker 7 (05:25):
Missus Davis. We won't embarrass Miss Brooks by mentioning it
in front of her, but we've got to try and
help her.
Speaker 3 (05:29):
Listen to Dorothy Daly's answer to Miss Brooks, Dear CB,
come out of your shell, improve your personality, and don't
be afraid to be the life of the party. Then
watch your mister peeb sit up and take notice yours
for nailing them down before they can wriggle off the hook.
Speaker 7 (05:45):
Dorothy Day, there's our.
Speaker 3 (05:49):
Problem, missus Davis. We've got to give Miss Brooks a personality.
I never noticed that she didn't have any. Now, remember,
missus Davis, Now a word to a soul. Of course,
I've told Harriet Conklin so she can tell her father
he has to give a party the night which Miss
Brooks can go to and be the life of That's
pretty short notice, didn't it, And that's why we have
to wake her up so early. This new personality is
(06:10):
a rush job ho jfle where she comes?
Speaker 5 (06:13):
Hi A CV, how's everything okay?
Speaker 2 (06:16):
Well, no, WD, it's n G and G. I didn't
get enough SLWP what sorry sl eap oh sleep.
Speaker 3 (06:34):
If you'll excuse me, I'll get some breakfast for as.
Speaker 4 (06:36):
I'll call you when it's ready.
Speaker 2 (06:38):
All right, missus Davis. Now then, Walder, what's the crisis? Crisis?
Speaker 3 (06:42):
There's no crisis. I just thought it would be nice
to have a little.
Speaker 2 (06:45):
Chat in the middle of the night. Now, look, Walller,
this April Fool's business leaves me pretty cold. So if
you're playing any pranks, oh.
Speaker 4 (06:52):
This has nothing to do with April Fool, Miss Brooks.
Speaker 3 (06:54):
It's just that I've been making a study of personalities lately,
and I've come to the conclusion that we should all
come out of our shell good.
Speaker 2 (07:01):
But let's not come out until late o'clock in the morning.
Speaker 3 (07:03):
Now, there's nothing like parlor magic to make anybody the
life of the party. For instance, have you seen the
disappearing quarter trick? Look I hold this quarter between my
thumb and third finger like this.
Speaker 2 (07:14):
Then I make a few magic passes.
Speaker 3 (07:17):
And presto, where's the quarter on the floor. Might have
a practice enough yet, But a trick like this you
could learn easy.
Speaker 2 (07:26):
I could learn it easily.
Speaker 7 (07:28):
I lily, you'd go for it. Here, take the quarter
in your left hand.
Speaker 2 (07:34):
Look, Walter, making money disappear is no trick for a
school teacher. Let's get some way to make some appear.
Then we'll have something breakfast is ready? Oh, come on
into the dinette, Walter.
Speaker 3 (07:45):
Get's sit right down. You sit here, Waldav. Thanks, Missus
Davis been kid used first, and I'll bring the rest
out in a minute.
Speaker 2 (07:51):
All right, Missus Davis, that's funny. This is orange juice.
Speaker 7 (07:55):
What's funny about that?
Speaker 2 (07:56):
The last breakfast Missus Davis prepared for me began with
marinated olive juice.
Speaker 3 (08:04):
All recipes are Oh say, I just thought of another
great party trick. It's called the spoon and the empty
glass trick.
Speaker 2 (08:11):
Here.
Speaker 3 (08:11):
I've got two spoons right here. Now, I placed the
back of one behind the front of the other, and
by means of leverage, PLoP it right into the empty glass.
Speaker 7 (08:20):
So lush the glass wasn't empty.
Speaker 2 (08:31):
It is now because my lap isn't as empty as
it was.
Speaker 7 (08:36):
So it upset you, Misus Brooks.
Speaker 3 (08:38):
One of the truest things ever said is the quotation
A damp garment should not dampen the spirits of the wearer,
who said, then I didn't here.
Speaker 4 (08:48):
We are now, Collie.
Speaker 3 (08:49):
I want to surprise you. Close your eyes before I
put this food down in front of you. Go ahead,
now please close them me tight?
Speaker 2 (08:57):
All right, Missus Davis, They're closed they.
Speaker 3 (09:00):
Now before you open them? Yes, what we've got for breakfast?
Speaker 7 (09:04):
Uh?
Speaker 2 (09:05):
Salmon Patty's fried in quantro.
Speaker 4 (09:08):
You no, I ran out of quanto.
Speaker 3 (09:13):
How a you don.
Speaker 2 (09:14):
Wheatcakes and raviolis?
Speaker 3 (09:16):
No, I guess you gotta give up.
Speaker 4 (09:19):
Open your eyes.
Speaker 2 (09:20):
Why what's this? Plain? Scrambled eggs, toast and coffee?
Speaker 3 (09:23):
That's right, Connie, he will roll.
Speaker 2 (09:36):
All this book.
Speaker 1 (09:37):
Sorrying Eve Arden will continue in just a moment. But
first here is Verne Smith. Want to win forty nine
thousand dollars in cash. That's right, forty nine thousand dollars
in cash, the first prize offered by the makers of
Palmolive soap in there, big exciting forty nine gold Rush
Contest Second prize four nine hundred dollars and there are
nine hundred forty nine other cash prizes. What a chance
(10:00):
win one hundred thousand dollars in cash prizes and it's
easy to enter. Simply finish this sentence. I like Palmali
soap because in twenty five words or less, that's all.
Just twenty five words or less to finish the sentence.
I like Palmali soap because then mail your entry right
away along with the Pomalid soap wrapper.
Speaker 2 (10:18):
Easy, isn't it?
Speaker 1 (10:19):
And remember thousands will strike it rich in this big
forty nine gold Rush contest. Enter as often as you like.
Get entry blanks and complete rules from your dealer, or
send your entries on plain paper with your name in
the dress and dealer's name in the dress, plus one
Pamali wrapper for each entry. Mail to gold Rush Contest
Box forty nine, New York eight, New York.
Speaker 2 (10:39):
You better write that.
Speaker 1 (10:40):
Down gold Rush Contest Box forty nine, New York eight,
New York.
Speaker 2 (10:45):
But hurry your.
Speaker 1 (10:46):
Last chance contest poses next Saturday. Get Palmali soap right
away to help win a lovelier complexion and try for
your share of the one hundred thousand dollars in cash prizes.
Well well to Dad's moving full speed ahead on his
efforts to aid c B. Take Dorothy Dailey's advice concerning
(11:08):
peeb Let's look in now on another of the conspirators,
Harriet Conklin, as she speaks to her father in the
principal's office.
Speaker 8 (11:15):
So all you have to do, Daddy, is to invite
this party to the party when she comes by this morning.
Speaker 1 (11:20):
But I don't see any reason for it, Harriet. I'm
getting sick and tired of this constant round of parties,
one mad world after another.
Speaker 7 (11:27):
Daddy.
Speaker 5 (11:28):
The last party you gave was on Thanksgiving.
Speaker 6 (11:31):
Oh that is vital, Daddy.
Speaker 8 (11:33):
I can't go into embarrassing detail, but we've got to
bring somebody out of herself.
Speaker 5 (11:38):
You've just got to invite miss Brooks to our party.
Speaker 1 (11:40):
Miss Brooks, but she has a party every day, all
day long.
Speaker 5 (11:46):
It only seems that way because of her pleasant exterior.
Speaker 8 (11:49):
Believe me, there are days when her heart is sorely
beset beneath that gay surface and lies in her bosom
like a dead thing.
Speaker 6 (12:01):
That must Femis Brooks now.
Speaker 1 (12:03):
But I won't go through with it, Harriet. I absolutely
refuse anything.
Speaker 6 (12:07):
You promised mother you'd go on a diet.
Speaker 1 (12:08):
Didn't you, Yes, but what does that got you?
Speaker 8 (12:10):
You don't invite miss Brooks to our party tonight, I'll
take that bar of fud I'm from under your deathslaughter
and show it to mother.
Speaker 6 (12:18):
Come in, my dear.
Speaker 2 (12:21):
I have told you you wanted to see me, mister Conklan.
Speaker 5 (12:23):
No, hello, Harriet, Hi, miss Brooks, Darry has something you want.
Speaker 2 (12:26):
To tell you.
Speaker 1 (12:27):
Yeah, yes, I've been coersed into having a little party
at our place tonight, Miss Brooks, And if you have
nothing else to do, we'd like you to come.
Speaker 2 (12:33):
Well, thanks, mister content, because if you can't come, we
may just drop the whole thing.
Speaker 5 (12:38):
I think i'll change the clatter on your desk right now.
Speaker 1 (12:43):
No, no, that is I'm sure it will be nice
to get together, all.
Speaker 2 (12:48):
Right, mister Conklin. Then if that'll be all, I'll see
you tonight.
Speaker 1 (12:51):
I'll be looking forward to it.
Speaker 8 (12:57):
Dismissed, I'll walk out with you, Miss brook Thanks Daddy,
and next time try the ones with the nuts in them.
Speaker 4 (13:04):
Girl.
Speaker 6 (13:06):
Do you know, miss Brooks, there's nothing like a.
Speaker 2 (13:09):
Party to bring a person out of her shell.
Speaker 5 (13:11):
You too, Harrod I'm beginning to like it in here now.
Speaker 8 (13:15):
The next thing you have to do, Miss Brooks, is
to meet us in the music appreciation room as soon
as lunch period gets here.
Speaker 2 (13:20):
The music appreciation room, you know, the old thing.
Speaker 6 (13:23):
Music has charms to soothe the savage breast.
Speaker 2 (13:26):
Yes, but I've been dating very few savages lately.
Speaker 9 (13:29):
Look, Harrott, what in.
Speaker 2 (13:30):
The world is this.
Speaker 8 (13:31):
I've got to get to my French class now, but
I'll see you at lunchtime. And remember, if you want
peev to eat out.
Speaker 10 (13:37):
Of your hand, you've got to cooperate. Ceebee Sols, I
am Miss Brooks.
Speaker 2 (13:52):
Mind if I walk down the hall with you? Not
at all, Walder. I'm just going to the music appreciation
room to meet Harriet. Don't ask me why.
Speaker 3 (13:59):
I know why, Miss Brooks, because tonight's party is and
everybody who comes must do something party and we've got
something swelled OpEd out for you to do for me
to do.
Speaker 7 (14:08):
You'll find out about it.
Speaker 2 (14:08):
In a minute.
Speaker 7 (14:09):
Hey, here's the music for miss Brooks.
Speaker 2 (14:11):
Let's go in. That'll be all for today. Well, he
came a long way to practice.
Speaker 1 (14:26):
Thanks Lever.
Speaker 9 (14:28):
I'm sure he'll make a fine musician. If he concentrates
on his violin and stops telling jokes.
Speaker 6 (14:34):
Were over all that we are? Did you bring it?
Speaker 9 (14:36):
Mister Pringle got it right in this case, Walter Good.
Speaker 8 (14:39):
You know, Miss Brooks, tonight's and everybody who comes must
do something party.
Speaker 2 (14:43):
Yes, I know, and I think I know what I'm
gonna do too, full stay home.
Speaker 7 (14:48):
Oh there'll be ridiculous Brooks.
Speaker 3 (14:49):
You know how well miss Enwright plays a piano, don't you?
Speaker 2 (14:52):
What is miss Enwright's playing the piano got to do
with me?
Speaker 8 (14:54):
It's pretty She is coming to the party tonight, and
you know how she likes to show off in front
of mister Boynton.
Speaker 3 (15:00):
But we're going to see to it that you're the
life of the party. Well, come on, Harriet, we've got
some more arrangements to make. Okay, Walter, you just put
yourself in mister Pringle's hands completely, Miss Brooks, that's right.
If you put yourself in mister Pringle's hands, now, who knows,
you may wind up in mister Boynton's arms later.
Speaker 7 (15:17):
I would.
Speaker 6 (15:17):
I'll see you tonight.
Speaker 2 (15:18):
Cev. Well, I don't know what this is all about,
mister Pringle.
Speaker 9 (15:26):
Take it easy, miss Brooks. All the children want you
to do is learn a very simple little specialty for
the party tonight.
Speaker 2 (15:31):
Stop.
Speaker 9 (15:31):
Tell me do you have any musical education at all?
Speaker 2 (15:33):
So when I was a little girl, I played in
our girls got band.
Speaker 1 (15:37):
Really what instruments?
Speaker 2 (15:38):
The tuba? I didn't keep at it though it did
something to my lips.
Speaker 9 (15:45):
You must have started to go difficult instrument to master.
Speaker 2 (15:49):
Yes, For months after I gave it up, I couldn'tdrink
a moltood without swallowing the straw.
Speaker 9 (15:56):
Well, what I've got in mind for you won't offer
any difficulties.
Speaker 4 (15:59):
I'm sure sure.
Speaker 5 (16:00):
Now this is a ukulele.
Speaker 1 (16:02):
It's the only instrument.
Speaker 9 (16:03):
Upon which a novice can pick out a simple tune
in no time at all. I hear, uh, just place
one finger.
Speaker 2 (16:08):
On this thread.
Speaker 9 (16:10):
So now this one here, that's right.
Speaker 2 (16:14):
Now play a chord, Go ahead, try it all right.
I'll try Washington Valley for struck bitter cold and spoke George,
Oh do do o?
Speaker 4 (16:33):
Do?
Speaker 6 (16:33):
Do? Do? Do you do? My letson? Do your duty?
Speaker 2 (16:36):
Everybody calls me cutie?
Speaker 6 (16:42):
Or does that's werful?
Speaker 2 (16:46):
Let's sing something together, all right, mister pringle. Paul Revere,
on a midnight ride, rode through town and loudly cry
go no deal do do doo, shake my hand and
call me Max. I've got a charge out of sack.
Speaker 6 (17:05):
Did you go away?
Speaker 2 (17:07):
Gaily? How He strums it boom boom, bounce it dancing dancing,
Then he hollers black bottom crazy words crazy toon. You'll
be driving me crazy soon with a b dodo do
do do doo, Miss Brooks do. What's the meaning of this,
(17:32):
mister Pringle?
Speaker 1 (17:33):
And what are you doing in mister Pringle's music room
during lunch period, Miss Brooks?
Speaker 2 (17:37):
I just dropped in for a melody burger.
Speaker 6 (17:39):
I mean I wanted to see if.
Speaker 2 (17:41):
I remembered something this room at once.
Speaker 1 (17:44):
As for you, mister Pringle, aren't you supposed to be
at lunch during this period? Yes, sir, I was just going,
sir well, put that ridiculous looking instrument down and get out, Yes, sir,
come on this Brooks naturally. Yeah, there's graceful carrying on
in the middle of the school day and with her
a ukulele.
Speaker 2 (18:07):
My dog hands please.
Speaker 1 (18:13):
Boom bom boom boom hole that tiger.
Speaker 6 (18:29):
Well, what do you think of the party so far?
Speaker 1 (18:31):
Mister boynh, it's very nice, Miss Brooksman I'm a little worried.
Everybody's supposed to get up and do something, aren't they.
Speaker 2 (18:37):
Well, that's the idea, guys.
Speaker 1 (18:39):
There isn't anything I could possibly do to entertain anybody.
Speaker 2 (18:42):
Oh I don't know, of course.
Speaker 1 (18:47):
I I did make a speech some months ago to
my biology club, but there are men I couldn't repeat
that in front of mixed company.
Speaker 2 (18:53):
Oh why not, mister Boyne. What was the subject of
the speech?
Speaker 1 (18:55):
Well, I'd rather not mention it, miss Brooks.
Speaker 2 (18:57):
It's it's a little racy. Well, i'll just listen with
won the year.
Speaker 11 (19:00):
What was it?
Speaker 6 (19:01):
Well, it was.
Speaker 1 (19:02):
Called the primitive urge of the sturgeon to swim upstream.
Speaker 2 (19:10):
That's funny. I always thought the sturgeon didn't need the urgent. Look,
mister Bourne, I'm as nervous as you are about getting
up and doing anything. But maybe we could do something.
Speaker 1 (19:22):
Together like wat Miss Brooks.
Speaker 2 (19:24):
Well, I just happened to have with me tonight this ukulele.
Speaker 1 (19:27):
Why are you I haven't seen one of those things
since my college days.
Speaker 2 (19:31):
It's really very simple to pick up. It all came
back to me in a flash. See you just put
one finger here, that's right now, This one here, so
now try it. It's from it, mister Barton.
Speaker 1 (19:44):
Oh see you in my dream? Oh you in my
don't be bashful, hold that pucker. You're the best in
Sophie Tucker.
Speaker 6 (20:08):
Where in the world is head coaching?
Speaker 2 (20:10):
I don't know, but this is a brand new Boyton.
Where did you go to college on the Keith Circuit? Boyce?
I've been looking all over for you.
Speaker 10 (20:20):
Long?
Speaker 1 (20:20):
Is then?
Speaker 11 (20:20):
Right?
Speaker 6 (20:21):
And dear miss Brooks, may I join you?
Speaker 11 (20:23):
You have?
Speaker 5 (20:25):
There seems to be room.
Speaker 2 (20:26):
On this couch for three, don't you think so? Only
if I sit in the middle. There we are. Missus
Brooks is so possessive.
Speaker 12 (20:35):
You don't ever want to share mister Boyton with anyone,
do you?
Speaker 10 (20:38):
Dear?
Speaker 2 (20:39):
The property has only been optioned that is not ready
for subdivisions.
Speaker 8 (20:46):
But mother says, if anybody wants cake and coffee, it's
on the table.
Speaker 6 (20:49):
Just help yourself flee.
Speaker 1 (20:50):
I think I'll get something. Missus Coppin certainly knows the way.
Speaker 2 (20:53):
To one man's high I like the overland route myself.
Would you run along, mister Barton?
Speaker 11 (20:58):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (20:58):
Can I bring you lady something?
Speaker 6 (21:00):
Just yourself?
Speaker 2 (21:01):
Dear mister Boynton, Yes, how about you?
Speaker 1 (21:04):
Miss Brooks.
Speaker 2 (21:05):
No, thanks, not right now.
Speaker 1 (21:06):
I'll be right back in a minute.
Speaker 2 (21:08):
Yes, so, no doubt you've got your specialty or prepared.
Speaker 12 (21:11):
Miss Brooks.
Speaker 2 (21:12):
Oh it's nothing, really, I.
Speaker 12 (21:14):
Didn't imagine it would be.
Speaker 5 (21:18):
Oh ya, I'm going to play the piano myself.
Speaker 2 (21:21):
That it should be lovely. It's obvious from your bill
that you've moved enough of them.
Speaker 6 (21:30):
It's funny.
Speaker 12 (21:32):
I wonder how funny you'll feel when I get up
and read this letter in Dorothy Day's columns.
Speaker 2 (21:37):
Letter.
Speaker 12 (21:37):
Yes, I've got the clipping right here.
Speaker 7 (21:39):
It's signed C B.
Speaker 12 (21:41):
And it says, Dear Dorothy Daily, I teach English in
high school, but my chief interest lies in a fellow
teacher of the opposite sex whose initials.
Speaker 7 (21:48):
Are pee B's pe b.
Speaker 2 (21:51):
Wait a minute, Philip Boyne exactly.
Speaker 12 (21:53):
It goes on to tell how CB can't make any
progress with peeb at all, and pleads for advice.
Speaker 2 (21:59):
Open it right. You don't think that why I didn't
write that letter.
Speaker 12 (22:02):
I know you didn't.
Speaker 2 (22:03):
I did you a little April fool's joke, miss Brooks.
Speaker 12 (22:07):
But of course when I read it, I won't mention
that detail, and even if you do, it'll just look
like a natural attempt to cover your embarrassment.
Speaker 2 (22:14):
But miss enright, even you wouldn't quite attention, folks, attention.
Speaker 3 (22:18):
We come out of that part of the party we've
alve in looking forward to so eagerly, the part where.
Speaker 7 (22:23):
Everybody must get up and do something.
Speaker 3 (22:26):
First, I like to introduce medicines, beloved English teacher, are
miss Brooks.
Speaker 2 (22:34):
Enjoy your brief moment?
Speaker 4 (22:35):
My dear, I'm going to follow you on with this
juicy little tidbit.
Speaker 2 (22:39):
What do you mean brief moment? I'm loaded with entertainments.
Speaker 7 (22:44):
What are you going to do for us tonight?
Speaker 2 (22:46):
Well, ladies and gentlemen. I thought I'd do a few
medleys of songs on the ukuleles, and a few recitations,
and maybe a parlor trick or two. First, the songs
Washington at Valle Forges was bitter Cold, Land, up spoken Orange.
So much for the songs. Now, I'd like to recite
(23:08):
for you a moment, Miss Brooks.
Speaker 5 (23:10):
You've been on for all pleas in right, and Miss
Brooke isn't finish.
Speaker 2 (23:13):
Thank you, Harriet. Under the spreading chestnut tree, the village
Smithy sund We hold these truths to be self evident,
that all men are created. As you can see, I
(23:33):
have here in my hand an ordinary deck of playing card.
And now I'd like to show you a fascinating parlor game.
Mister Conslin, do you have a phone book I could borrow? Yes,
Miss Brooks, is one right here on this table.
Speaker 1 (23:49):
But don't you think it's a little late to phone anyone.
It's almost twelve o'clock.
Speaker 2 (23:53):
I'm not going to phone anyone. Walter, get a piece
of paper and a pencil, please.
Speaker 7 (23:58):
How ca, Miss Brooks?
Speaker 3 (23:59):
I think this is the most please, Miss Enwright. You're interrupting,
Miss Brooks.
Speaker 2 (24:04):
Wal Now, the idea of this game is to guess
which name in the phone book I'm thinking of part
of the a's. If you get a feeling that I've
said the one I'm concentrating on, just call out, ready,
go Abbott, Abernathy, Ackerman, Addison, Passco, Peyton, Penneman, printed Jack Zimmerman,
(24:34):
Zimmerman A. Zimmerman B. Hasn't anyone got a feeling yet?
Mister Brighton, how about mister Barton? Where are you?
Speaker 7 (24:43):
Mister Boyton went home, Miss Brooks.
Speaker 2 (24:45):
He went home. When right after mister and missus.
Speaker 3 (24:47):
Conklin went to bed, he said, I didn't want to
disturb you, so miss Enwright.
Speaker 4 (24:52):
Drove him home.
Speaker 2 (24:52):
Miss Enright, well that's the last straw you know, of course, Walter,
that it was miss Enright who wrote that Dorothy Daily letter.
Miss Enright, that's right, Walter. She signed my initials, but
it was her letter that Dorothy Daly answered in her column. Boy,
what a.
Speaker 7 (25:06):
Dirty trick I saw. You were so embarrassed, Miss Brooks.
Speaker 2 (25:10):
If you think I was embarrassed tonight, just wait, Walter,
till you see to meet tomorrow when Dorothy Day answers
the letter I wrote her.
Speaker 1 (25:26):
Ardness all, Miss Brooks returns in just a moment. But first,
dream girl, dream girl, beautiful, luster cream girl, tonight show
him how much lovelier your hair can look after a
luster cream shampoo. Only luster cream brings you k Duma's
magic formula blend of secret ingredients plus gentle Lanolin gives loveliness,
(25:49):
leather even in hardest water, glamorizes your hair as you
wash it.
Speaker 2 (25:54):
Luster Cream not a.
Speaker 13 (25:56):
Soap, not a liquid, but a dainty cream shampoo's hair
fragrantly clean, free of loose dandruf, blistening with sheen, soft, manageable, gives.
Speaker 1 (26:06):
New beauty to all hairdoos or permanence four ounce jar,
one dollar smaller.
Speaker 13 (26:12):
Sizes either tubes or jars.
Speaker 1 (26:14):
Tonight, try luster cream shampoo and be a dream girl.
Speaker 11 (26:20):
Dream girl beautiful luster cream. You owe your crowning glory too,
a luster cream shampoo.
Speaker 1 (26:34):
Now once again, here is our Miss Brooks.
Speaker 13 (26:36):
Well.
Speaker 2 (26:37):
I had a date with mister Boynton on the following day,
and I couldn't wait to find out if Miss Enwright
had told him about the Dorothy Daily column. Sure enough,
it was the first thing he mentioned when he came
by to pick me up.
Speaker 1 (26:47):
That letter in the paper is Brooks It? It certainly
has me puzzled. Puzzled mister Boyton, Yes, sir, I know,
of course that you're ceed Bee, But who in the
world is Peebee?
Speaker 2 (26:59):
I got sure you get Phoebe is no flame of mine?
Fellow named Paul Bunyan.
Speaker 9 (27:09):
Into another ar, Miss.
Speaker 1 (27:10):
Brookshaw brought you by Parmalla Tap your beauty, Hope and
luster cream Campoo for soft, glamorous, caressible hair. R Miss
Brooks starring e Varden is produced by Larry Burns, written
and directed by Al Lewis, with music by Wilbur hatch.
Speaker 2 (27:28):
Men.
Speaker 1 (27:28):
Here is actual factual proof of more comfortable, actually smoother
shaves by using Palmala.
Speaker 2 (27:34):
Lather shaving cream.
Speaker 1 (27:36):
Twelve hundred and fifty one men tried the Pamala latherway
to shave described on the tube, and no matter how
they shaved before, three out of four got more comfortable
actually smoother shaves. Try Pamala lather shaving cream. See if
you don't get more comfortable, actually smoother shaves the Pamaala
lather shaving cream way or mystery Liberally laughs. Listen to
(28:01):
Mister and Missus North, the exciting fun fact adventures of
an amateur detective and his beautiful wife. Tune in Tuesday
evenings over most of these same stations, and be with
us again next week at the same time for another
comedy episode of our Miss Brooks. Cancer causes a death
every three minutes, and unless the present cancer death rate
is reduced, eighteen million living Americans will die from it.
(28:22):
This will effect on the average one out of every
two families in the United States. You can help stop
the further spread of cancer by helping the American Cancer
Society to provide more surgery, X ray and radium treatments.
So give generously to the American Cancer Society. Today, stay
tuned now for Life with Luigi, which follows. Over most
of these same stations.
Speaker 2 (28:43):
The Columbia broadcast themes at
Ham Olive soap Your Beauty Hope and bluster Cream Campoo
for soft, glamorous carossible hair. Bring You Our Miss Brooks
starring Eve arden All in this book, who teaches English
at Madison High School, has always tried to get along
with her fellow faculty members, regardless of whether they're male
(00:23):
or female.
Speaker 2 (00:24):
One thing that school teachers of either sex have in
common is the fact that he, she or them was
is an r underpaid. But there is one definite advantage
held by the men. When a male school teacher hasn't
enough money to go to the movies, he can stay
home and look at the pictures on his Esquire calendar.
I've overcome that advantage to some slight extent by making
(00:46):
my own calendar. I've used twelve snapshots, one for each
month of Madison's Bashful biologist Philip Boyntman. There they are
right on my bedroom wall. January mister Boynton, and is
up to the minute raccoon coat. February mister Boynton on
Valentine's Day with a big red heart shaped box under
(01:09):
his arm containing flies for his frog McDougall. Then March
mister Boynton in plus fours a stripe blazer and a
three propeller beanie. Last Friday morning, when I tore the
page for March off my calendar, there was mister Boynton
with his arms around me, so I knew it was
(01:30):
April Fool's Day. My Landlady, Missus Davis knocked on my
door a moment later. Come in.
Speaker 3 (01:38):
Good morning, Connie, many happy weekends at the game.
Speaker 2 (01:41):
Thanks Missus Davis. Happy April Fool's Day to you. Four time?
Is it anyway? I'm still sleepy.
Speaker 3 (01:48):
It's almost seven, Connie. I'd been up for hours planning
to build creeks to play on people.
Speaker 2 (01:53):
Well, I hope you're not going to be as naughty
as you were last year, setting fire crackers off in
our yard to make everybody think it was fourth of July.
Speaker 4 (02:02):
But that was fun, wasn't it.
Speaker 2 (02:04):
Yes, until one of your pin wheels joined me in
the shower.
Speaker 3 (02:09):
Let's see now, I came up here to tell you
something rather important.
Speaker 4 (02:13):
Oh dear me.
Speaker 3 (02:14):
Whenever I talked to my sister Angela, I become almost
as absent minded as she is. We had quite a
conversation on the phone this morning.
Speaker 2 (02:21):
How is Angela fine?
Speaker 4 (02:23):
Thank you?
Speaker 3 (02:24):
But she's so flighty fy right in the middle of
our telephone conversation. She forgot that she was talking about completely.
I'm worried about her. It's like I was telling my
brother the other day, We've got to do something.
Speaker 2 (02:37):
I said, You've got to do something about what. I
was just repeating what you said to your brother.
Speaker 4 (02:46):
Which brother.
Speaker 2 (02:52):
I don't know, your brother, Victor. I guess, I guess so.
Speaker 5 (02:55):
Well, it's a.
Speaker 4 (02:59):
Beautiful hey, Missus Davis.
Speaker 2 (03:01):
You came in here to tell me something. I try
and remember what it was so I can take a
shower and get dressed and forget about it. Oh.
Speaker 3 (03:08):
Yes, one of your students is reading for you in
the living room.
Speaker 2 (03:11):
Walter Dington, Walter Dentton. What's he doing here so early?
Speaker 4 (03:15):
All right, Connie, I'll tell him.
Speaker 6 (03:17):
But what.
Speaker 7 (03:20):
Poor thing?
Speaker 3 (03:20):
She's got so much on her mind she can't concentrate.
Speaker 7 (03:23):
Hi, Missus Davis, Walter.
Speaker 4 (03:25):
What are you doing here?
Speaker 3 (03:27):
You just love me here, Missus Davis, when you went
in to see Miss Brooks.
Speaker 4 (03:30):
Oh, that reminds me. What are you doing here so early?
Speaker 7 (03:34):
Well, it's a big secret, Missus Davis.
Speaker 3 (03:36):
But I'll tell you if you promise to keep it
strictly confidential. I promise you won't forget now. I won't
forget what now? To keep it confidential, to keep worth confidential,
I guess it's safe with you. Look at this newspaper column, the.
Speaker 5 (03:55):
One called Dorothy Day's Daily.
Speaker 7 (03:57):
Advice to the Heartsore.
Speaker 4 (03:59):
Oh, I be that all the time.
Speaker 3 (04:01):
You never read a letter like this one, though, I'll
bet listen, dear Dorothy Daily. I teach English in high school,
but my chief interest lies in the fellow teacher of
the opposite sex, whose initials are PEB. No matter how
I try, I can't seem to make any progress with him.
I'm attractive without being ravishing, intelligent without being stuffy, cheerful,
(04:22):
without being a Pollyanna. But mostly I'm without PEB. Can
you help me sign CB? Where I certainly sympathize with
that young lady. But to now, wait a minute, Hannie
Brooks Walter, do you think the CB in this letter
could be the CB? I think the CB could be.
Speaker 2 (04:43):
I'm positive it is.
Speaker 3 (04:44):
Look who she's stuck on, PEB, Philip pointon Walter. PEB
could stand for anybody. Why it could stand for Paul Bunyon.
Missus Davis, you're closer to Miss Brooks than any of us.
Does she know anybody named Paul?
Speaker 4 (05:00):
No, not that I know. Love.
Speaker 6 (05:02):
Then there you are.
Speaker 7 (05:03):
She's got to be CB.
Speaker 3 (05:05):
But Balter, can you honestly think Miss Brooks would write
a letter like this to a public newspaper? For sure,
missus Davis, haven't you heard the famous epigram love and
its desperation turns to many strange devices?
Speaker 2 (05:20):
No longer who.
Speaker 7 (05:21):
Said that I did?
Speaker 2 (05:24):
Well?
Speaker 7 (05:25):
Missus Davis. We won't embarrass Miss Brooks by mentioning it
in front of her, but we've got to try and
help her.
Speaker 3 (05:29):
Listen to Dorothy Daly's answer to Miss Brooks, Dear CB,
come out of your shell, improve your personality, and don't
be afraid to be the life of the party. Then
watch your mister peeb sit up and take notice yours
for nailing them down before they can wriggle off the hook.
Speaker 7 (05:45):
Dorothy Day, there's our.
Speaker 3 (05:49):
Problem, missus Davis. We've got to give Miss Brooks a personality.
I never noticed that she didn't have any. Now, remember,
missus Davis, Now a word to a soul. Of course,
I've told Harriet Conklin so she can tell her father
he has to give a party the night which Miss
Brooks can go to and be the life of That's
pretty short notice, didn't it, And that's why we have
to wake her up so early. This new personality is
(06:10):
a rush job ho jfle where she comes?
Speaker 5 (06:13):
Hi A CV, how's everything okay?
Speaker 2 (06:16):
Well, no, WD, it's n G and G. I didn't
get enough SLWP what sorry sl eap oh sleep.
Speaker 3 (06:34):
If you'll excuse me, I'll get some breakfast for as.
Speaker 4 (06:36):
I'll call you when it's ready.
Speaker 2 (06:38):
All right, missus Davis. Now then, Walder, what's the crisis? Crisis?
Speaker 3 (06:42):
There's no crisis. I just thought it would be nice
to have a little.
Speaker 2 (06:45):
Chat in the middle of the night. Now, look, Walller,
this April Fool's business leaves me pretty cold. So if
you're playing any pranks, oh.
Speaker 4 (06:52):
This has nothing to do with April Fool, Miss Brooks.
Speaker 3 (06:54):
It's just that I've been making a study of personalities lately,
and I've come to the conclusion that we should all
come out of our shell good.
Speaker 2 (07:01):
But let's not come out until late o'clock in the morning.
Speaker 3 (07:03):
Now, there's nothing like parlor magic to make anybody the
life of the party. For instance, have you seen the
disappearing quarter trick? Look I hold this quarter between my
thumb and third finger like this.
Speaker 2 (07:14):
Then I make a few magic passes.
Speaker 3 (07:17):
And presto, where's the quarter on the floor. Might have
a practice enough yet, But a trick like this you
could learn easy.
Speaker 2 (07:26):
I could learn it easily.
Speaker 7 (07:28):
I lily, you'd go for it. Here, take the quarter
in your left hand.
Speaker 2 (07:34):
Look, Walter, making money disappear is no trick for a
school teacher. Let's get some way to make some appear.
Then we'll have something breakfast is ready? Oh, come on
into the dinette, Walter.
Speaker 3 (07:45):
Get's sit right down. You sit here, Waldav. Thanks, Missus
Davis been kid used first, and I'll bring the rest
out in a minute.
Speaker 2 (07:51):
All right, Missus Davis, that's funny. This is orange juice.
Speaker 7 (07:55):
What's funny about that?
Speaker 2 (07:56):
The last breakfast Missus Davis prepared for me began with
marinated olive juice.
Speaker 3 (08:04):
All recipes are Oh say, I just thought of another
great party trick. It's called the spoon and the empty
glass trick.
Speaker 2 (08:11):
Here.
Speaker 3 (08:11):
I've got two spoons right here. Now, I placed the
back of one behind the front of the other, and
by means of leverage, PLoP it right into the empty glass.
Speaker 7 (08:20):
So lush the glass wasn't empty.
Speaker 2 (08:31):
It is now because my lap isn't as empty as
it was.
Speaker 7 (08:36):
So it upset you, Misus Brooks.
Speaker 3 (08:38):
One of the truest things ever said is the quotation
A damp garment should not dampen the spirits of the wearer,
who said, then I didn't here.
Speaker 4 (08:48):
We are now, Collie.
Speaker 3 (08:49):
I want to surprise you. Close your eyes before I
put this food down in front of you. Go ahead,
now please close them me tight?
Speaker 2 (08:57):
All right, Missus Davis, They're closed they.
Speaker 3 (09:00):
Now before you open them? Yes, what we've got for breakfast?
Speaker 7 (09:04):
Uh?
Speaker 2 (09:05):
Salmon Patty's fried in quantro.
Speaker 4 (09:08):
You no, I ran out of quanto.
Speaker 3 (09:13):
How a you don.
Speaker 2 (09:14):
Wheatcakes and raviolis?
Speaker 3 (09:16):
No, I guess you gotta give up.
Speaker 4 (09:19):
Open your eyes.
Speaker 2 (09:20):
Why what's this? Plain? Scrambled eggs, toast and coffee?
Speaker 3 (09:23):
That's right, Connie, he will roll.
Speaker 2 (09:36):
All this book.
Speaker 1 (09:37):
Sorrying Eve Arden will continue in just a moment. But
first here is Verne Smith. Want to win forty nine
thousand dollars in cash. That's right, forty nine thousand dollars
in cash, the first prize offered by the makers of
Palmolive soap in there, big exciting forty nine gold Rush
Contest Second prize four nine hundred dollars and there are
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(10:00):
win one hundred thousand dollars in cash prizes and it's
easy to enter. Simply finish this sentence. I like Palmali
soap because in twenty five words or less, that's all.
Just twenty five words or less to finish the sentence.
I like Palmali soap because then mail your entry right
away along with the Pomalid soap wrapper.
Speaker 2 (10:18):
Easy, isn't it?
Speaker 1 (10:19):
And remember thousands will strike it rich in this big
forty nine gold Rush contest. Enter as often as you like.
Get entry blanks and complete rules from your dealer, or
send your entries on plain paper with your name in
the dress and dealer's name in the dress, plus one
Pamali wrapper for each entry. Mail to gold Rush Contest
Box forty nine, New York eight, New York.
Speaker 2 (10:39):
You better write that.
Speaker 1 (10:40):
Down gold Rush Contest Box forty nine, New York eight,
New York.
Speaker 2 (10:45):
But hurry your.
Speaker 1 (10:46):
Last chance contest poses next Saturday. Get Palmali soap right
away to help win a lovelier complexion and try for
your share of the one hundred thousand dollars in cash prizes.
Well well to Dad's moving full speed ahead on his
efforts to aid c B. Take Dorothy Dailey's advice concerning
(11:08):
peeb Let's look in now on another of the conspirators,
Harriet Conklin, as she speaks to her father in the
principal's office.
Speaker 8 (11:15):
So all you have to do, Daddy, is to invite
this party to the party when she comes by this morning.
Speaker 1 (11:20):
But I don't see any reason for it, Harriet. I'm
getting sick and tired of this constant round of parties,
one mad world after another.
Speaker 7 (11:27):
Daddy.
Speaker 5 (11:28):
The last party you gave was on Thanksgiving.
Speaker 6 (11:31):
Oh that is vital, Daddy.
Speaker 8 (11:33):
I can't go into embarrassing detail, but we've got to
bring somebody out of herself.
Speaker 5 (11:38):
You've just got to invite miss Brooks to our party.
Speaker 1 (11:40):
Miss Brooks, but she has a party every day, all
day long.
Speaker 5 (11:46):
It only seems that way because of her pleasant exterior.
Speaker 8 (11:49):
Believe me, there are days when her heart is sorely
beset beneath that gay surface and lies in her bosom
like a dead thing.
Speaker 6 (12:01):
That must Femis Brooks now.
Speaker 1 (12:03):
But I won't go through with it, Harriet. I absolutely
refuse anything.
Speaker 6 (12:07):
You promised mother you'd go on a diet.
Speaker 1 (12:08):
Didn't you, Yes, but what does that got you?
Speaker 8 (12:10):
You don't invite miss Brooks to our party tonight, I'll
take that bar of fud I'm from under your deathslaughter
and show it to mother.
Speaker 6 (12:18):
Come in, my dear.
Speaker 2 (12:21):
I have told you you wanted to see me, mister Conklan.
Speaker 5 (12:23):
No, hello, Harriet, Hi, miss Brooks, Darry has something you want.
Speaker 2 (12:26):
To tell you.
Speaker 1 (12:27):
Yeah, yes, I've been coersed into having a little party
at our place tonight, Miss Brooks, And if you have
nothing else to do, we'd like you to come.
Speaker 2 (12:33):
Well, thanks, mister content, because if you can't come, we
may just drop the whole thing.
Speaker 5 (12:38):
I think i'll change the clatter on your desk right now.
Speaker 1 (12:43):
No, no, that is I'm sure it will be nice
to get together, all.
Speaker 2 (12:48):
Right, mister Conklin. Then if that'll be all, I'll see
you tonight.
Speaker 1 (12:51):
I'll be looking forward to it.
Speaker 8 (12:57):
Dismissed, I'll walk out with you, Miss brook Thanks Daddy,
and next time try the ones with the nuts in them.
Speaker 4 (13:04):
Girl.
Speaker 6 (13:06):
Do you know, miss Brooks, there's nothing like a.
Speaker 2 (13:09):
Party to bring a person out of her shell.
Speaker 5 (13:11):
You too, Harrod I'm beginning to like it in here now.
Speaker 8 (13:15):
The next thing you have to do, Miss Brooks, is
to meet us in the music appreciation room as soon
as lunch period gets here.
Speaker 2 (13:20):
The music appreciation room, you know, the old thing.
Speaker 6 (13:23):
Music has charms to soothe the savage breast.
Speaker 2 (13:26):
Yes, but I've been dating very few savages lately.
Speaker 9 (13:29):
Look, Harrott, what in.
Speaker 2 (13:30):
The world is this.
Speaker 8 (13:31):
I've got to get to my French class now, but
I'll see you at lunchtime. And remember, if you want
peev to eat out.
Speaker 10 (13:37):
Of your hand, you've got to cooperate. Ceebee Sols, I
am Miss Brooks.
Speaker 2 (13:52):
Mind if I walk down the hall with you? Not
at all, Walder. I'm just going to the music appreciation
room to meet Harriet. Don't ask me why.
Speaker 3 (13:59):
I know why, Miss Brooks, because tonight's party is and
everybody who comes must do something party and we've got
something swelled OpEd out for you to do for me
to do.
Speaker 7 (14:08):
You'll find out about it.
Speaker 2 (14:08):
In a minute.
Speaker 7 (14:09):
Hey, here's the music for miss Brooks.
Speaker 2 (14:11):
Let's go in. That'll be all for today. Well, he
came a long way to practice.
Speaker 1 (14:26):
Thanks Lever.
Speaker 9 (14:28):
I'm sure he'll make a fine musician. If he concentrates
on his violin and stops telling jokes.
Speaker 6 (14:34):
Were over all that we are? Did you bring it?
Speaker 9 (14:36):
Mister Pringle got it right in this case, Walter Good.
Speaker 8 (14:39):
You know, Miss Brooks, tonight's and everybody who comes must
do something party.
Speaker 2 (14:43):
Yes, I know, and I think I know what I'm
gonna do too, full stay home.
Speaker 7 (14:48):
Oh there'll be ridiculous Brooks.
Speaker 3 (14:49):
You know how well miss Enwright plays a piano, don't you?
Speaker 2 (14:52):
What is miss Enwright's playing the piano got to do
with me?
Speaker 8 (14:54):
It's pretty She is coming to the party tonight, and
you know how she likes to show off in front
of mister Boynton.
Speaker 3 (15:00):
But we're going to see to it that you're the
life of the party. Well, come on, Harriet, we've got
some more arrangements to make. Okay, Walter, you just put
yourself in mister Pringle's hands completely, Miss Brooks, that's right.
If you put yourself in mister Pringle's hands, now, who knows,
you may wind up in mister Boynton's arms later.
Speaker 7 (15:17):
I would.
Speaker 6 (15:17):
I'll see you tonight.
Speaker 2 (15:18):
Cev. Well, I don't know what this is all about,
mister Pringle.
Speaker 9 (15:26):
Take it easy, miss Brooks. All the children want you
to do is learn a very simple little specialty for
the party tonight.
Speaker 2 (15:31):
Stop.
Speaker 9 (15:31):
Tell me do you have any musical education at all?
Speaker 2 (15:33):
So when I was a little girl, I played in
our girls got band.
Speaker 1 (15:37):
Really what instruments?
Speaker 2 (15:38):
The tuba? I didn't keep at it though it did
something to my lips.
Speaker 9 (15:45):
You must have started to go difficult instrument to master.
Speaker 2 (15:49):
Yes, For months after I gave it up, I couldn'tdrink
a moltood without swallowing the straw.
Speaker 9 (15:56):
Well, what I've got in mind for you won't offer
any difficulties.
Speaker 4 (15:59):
I'm sure sure.
Speaker 5 (16:00):
Now this is a ukulele.
Speaker 1 (16:02):
It's the only instrument.
Speaker 9 (16:03):
Upon which a novice can pick out a simple tune
in no time at all. I hear, uh, just place
one finger.
Speaker 2 (16:08):
On this thread.
Speaker 9 (16:10):
So now this one here, that's right.
Speaker 2 (16:14):
Now play a chord, Go ahead, try it all right.
I'll try Washington Valley for struck bitter cold and spoke George,
Oh do do o?
Speaker 4 (16:33):
Do?
Speaker 6 (16:33):
Do? Do? Do you do? My letson? Do your duty?
Speaker 2 (16:36):
Everybody calls me cutie?
Speaker 6 (16:42):
Or does that's werful?
Speaker 2 (16:46):
Let's sing something together, all right, mister pringle. Paul Revere,
on a midnight ride, rode through town and loudly cry
go no deal do do doo, shake my hand and
call me Max. I've got a charge out of sack.
Speaker 6 (17:05):
Did you go away?
Speaker 2 (17:07):
Gaily? How He strums it boom boom, bounce it dancing dancing,
Then he hollers black bottom crazy words crazy toon. You'll
be driving me crazy soon with a b dodo do
do do doo, Miss Brooks do. What's the meaning of this,
(17:32):
mister Pringle?
Speaker 1 (17:33):
And what are you doing in mister Pringle's music room
during lunch period, Miss Brooks?
Speaker 2 (17:37):
I just dropped in for a melody burger.
Speaker 6 (17:39):
I mean I wanted to see if.
Speaker 2 (17:41):
I remembered something this room at once.
Speaker 1 (17:44):
As for you, mister Pringle, aren't you supposed to be
at lunch during this period? Yes, sir, I was just going,
sir well, put that ridiculous looking instrument down and get out, Yes, sir,
come on this Brooks naturally. Yeah, there's graceful carrying on
in the middle of the school day and with her
a ukulele.
Speaker 2 (18:07):
My dog hands please.
Speaker 1 (18:13):
Boom bom boom boom hole that tiger.
Speaker 6 (18:29):
Well, what do you think of the party so far?
Speaker 1 (18:31):
Mister boynh, it's very nice, Miss Brooksman I'm a little worried.
Everybody's supposed to get up and do something, aren't they.
Speaker 2 (18:37):
Well, that's the idea, guys.
Speaker 1 (18:39):
There isn't anything I could possibly do to entertain anybody.
Speaker 2 (18:42):
Oh I don't know, of course.
Speaker 1 (18:47):
I I did make a speech some months ago to
my biology club, but there are men I couldn't repeat
that in front of mixed company.
Speaker 2 (18:53):
Oh why not, mister Boyne. What was the subject of
the speech?
Speaker 1 (18:55):
Well, I'd rather not mention it, miss Brooks.
Speaker 2 (18:57):
It's it's a little racy. Well, i'll just listen with
won the year.
Speaker 11 (19:00):
What was it?
Speaker 6 (19:01):
Well, it was.
Speaker 1 (19:02):
Called the primitive urge of the sturgeon to swim upstream.
Speaker 2 (19:10):
That's funny. I always thought the sturgeon didn't need the urgent. Look,
mister Bourne, I'm as nervous as you are about getting
up and doing anything. But maybe we could do something.
Speaker 1 (19:22):
Together like wat Miss Brooks.
Speaker 2 (19:24):
Well, I just happened to have with me tonight this ukulele.
Speaker 1 (19:27):
Why are you I haven't seen one of those things
since my college days.
Speaker 2 (19:31):
It's really very simple to pick up. It all came
back to me in a flash. See you just put
one finger here, that's right now, This one here, so
now try it. It's from it, mister Barton.
Speaker 1 (19:44):
Oh see you in my dream? Oh you in my
don't be bashful, hold that pucker. You're the best in
Sophie Tucker.
Speaker 6 (20:08):
Where in the world is head coaching?
Speaker 2 (20:10):
I don't know, but this is a brand new Boyton.
Where did you go to college on the Keith Circuit? Boyce?
I've been looking all over for you.
Speaker 10 (20:20):
Long?
Speaker 1 (20:20):
Is then?
Speaker 11 (20:20):
Right?
Speaker 6 (20:21):
And dear miss Brooks, may I join you?
Speaker 11 (20:23):
You have?
Speaker 5 (20:25):
There seems to be room.
Speaker 2 (20:26):
On this couch for three, don't you think so? Only
if I sit in the middle. There we are. Missus
Brooks is so possessive.
Speaker 12 (20:35):
You don't ever want to share mister Boyton with anyone,
do you?
Speaker 10 (20:38):
Dear?
Speaker 2 (20:39):
The property has only been optioned that is not ready
for subdivisions.
Speaker 8 (20:46):
But mother says, if anybody wants cake and coffee, it's
on the table.
Speaker 6 (20:49):
Just help yourself flee.
Speaker 1 (20:50):
I think I'll get something. Missus Coppin certainly knows the way.
Speaker 2 (20:53):
To one man's high I like the overland route myself.
Would you run along, mister Barton?
Speaker 11 (20:58):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (20:58):
Can I bring you lady something?
Speaker 6 (21:00):
Just yourself?
Speaker 2 (21:01):
Dear mister Boynton, Yes, how about you?
Speaker 1 (21:04):
Miss Brooks.
Speaker 2 (21:05):
No, thanks, not right now.
Speaker 1 (21:06):
I'll be right back in a minute.
Speaker 2 (21:08):
Yes, so, no doubt you've got your specialty or prepared.
Speaker 12 (21:11):
Miss Brooks.
Speaker 2 (21:12):
Oh it's nothing, really, I.
Speaker 12 (21:14):
Didn't imagine it would be.
Speaker 5 (21:18):
Oh ya, I'm going to play the piano myself.
Speaker 2 (21:21):
That it should be lovely. It's obvious from your bill
that you've moved enough of them.
Speaker 6 (21:30):
It's funny.
Speaker 12 (21:32):
I wonder how funny you'll feel when I get up
and read this letter in Dorothy Day's columns.
Speaker 2 (21:37):
Letter.
Speaker 12 (21:37):
Yes, I've got the clipping right here.
Speaker 7 (21:39):
It's signed C B.
Speaker 12 (21:41):
And it says, Dear Dorothy Daily, I teach English in
high school, but my chief interest lies in a fellow
teacher of the opposite sex whose initials.
Speaker 7 (21:48):
Are pee B's pe b.
Speaker 2 (21:51):
Wait a minute, Philip Boyne exactly.
Speaker 12 (21:53):
It goes on to tell how CB can't make any
progress with peeb at all, and pleads for advice.
Speaker 2 (21:59):
Open it right. You don't think that why I didn't
write that letter.
Speaker 12 (22:02):
I know you didn't.
Speaker 2 (22:03):
I did you a little April fool's joke, miss Brooks.
Speaker 12 (22:07):
But of course when I read it, I won't mention
that detail, and even if you do, it'll just look
like a natural attempt to cover your embarrassment.
Speaker 2 (22:14):
But miss enright, even you wouldn't quite attention, folks, attention.
Speaker 3 (22:18):
We come out of that part of the party we've
alve in looking forward to so eagerly, the part where.
Speaker 7 (22:23):
Everybody must get up and do something.
Speaker 3 (22:26):
First, I like to introduce medicines, beloved English teacher, are
miss Brooks.
Speaker 2 (22:34):
Enjoy your brief moment?
Speaker 4 (22:35):
My dear, I'm going to follow you on with this
juicy little tidbit.
Speaker 2 (22:39):
What do you mean brief moment? I'm loaded with entertainments.
Speaker 7 (22:44):
What are you going to do for us tonight?
Speaker 2 (22:46):
Well, ladies and gentlemen. I thought I'd do a few
medleys of songs on the ukuleles, and a few recitations,
and maybe a parlor trick or two. First, the songs
Washington at Valle Forges was bitter Cold, Land, up spoken Orange.
So much for the songs. Now, I'd like to recite
(23:08):
for you a moment, Miss Brooks.
Speaker 5 (23:10):
You've been on for all pleas in right, and Miss
Brooke isn't finish.
Speaker 2 (23:13):
Thank you, Harriet. Under the spreading chestnut tree, the village
Smithy sund We hold these truths to be self evident,
that all men are created. As you can see, I
(23:33):
have here in my hand an ordinary deck of playing card.
And now I'd like to show you a fascinating parlor game.
Mister Conslin, do you have a phone book I could borrow? Yes,
Miss Brooks, is one right here on this table.
Speaker 1 (23:49):
But don't you think it's a little late to phone anyone.
It's almost twelve o'clock.
Speaker 2 (23:53):
I'm not going to phone anyone. Walter, get a piece
of paper and a pencil, please.
Speaker 7 (23:58):
How ca, Miss Brooks?
Speaker 3 (23:59):
I think this is the most please, Miss Enwright. You're interrupting,
Miss Brooks.
Speaker 2 (24:04):
Wal Now, the idea of this game is to guess
which name in the phone book I'm thinking of part
of the a's. If you get a feeling that I've
said the one I'm concentrating on, just call out, ready,
go Abbott, Abernathy, Ackerman, Addison, Passco, Peyton, Penneman, printed Jack Zimmerman,
(24:34):
Zimmerman A. Zimmerman B. Hasn't anyone got a feeling yet?
Mister Brighton, how about mister Barton? Where are you?
Speaker 7 (24:43):
Mister Boyton went home, Miss Brooks.
Speaker 2 (24:45):
He went home. When right after mister and missus.
Speaker 3 (24:47):
Conklin went to bed, he said, I didn't want to
disturb you, so miss Enwright.
Speaker 4 (24:52):
Drove him home.
Speaker 2 (24:52):
Miss Enright, well that's the last straw you know, of course, Walter,
that it was miss Enright who wrote that Dorothy Daily letter.
Miss Enright, that's right, Walter. She signed my initials, but
it was her letter that Dorothy Daly answered in her column. Boy,
what a.
Speaker 7 (25:06):
Dirty trick I saw. You were so embarrassed, Miss Brooks.
Speaker 2 (25:10):
If you think I was embarrassed tonight, just wait, Walter,
till you see to meet tomorrow when Dorothy Day answers
the letter I wrote her.
Speaker 1 (25:26):
Ardness all, Miss Brooks returns in just a moment. But first,
dream girl, dream girl, beautiful, luster cream girl, tonight show
him how much lovelier your hair can look after a
luster cream shampoo. Only luster cream brings you k Duma's
magic formula blend of secret ingredients plus gentle Lanolin gives loveliness,
(25:49):
leather even in hardest water, glamorizes your hair as you
wash it.
Speaker 2 (25:54):
Luster Cream not a.
Speaker 13 (25:56):
Soap, not a liquid, but a dainty cream shampoo's hair
fragrantly clean, free of loose dandruf, blistening with sheen, soft, manageable, gives.
Speaker 1 (26:06):
New beauty to all hairdoos or permanence four ounce jar,
one dollar smaller.
Speaker 13 (26:12):
Sizes either tubes or jars.
Speaker 1 (26:14):
Tonight, try luster cream shampoo and be a dream girl.
Speaker 11 (26:20):
Dream girl beautiful luster cream. You owe your crowning glory too,
a luster cream shampoo.
Speaker 1 (26:34):
Now once again, here is our Miss Brooks.
Speaker 13 (26:36):
Well.
Speaker 2 (26:37):
I had a date with mister Boynton on the following day,
and I couldn't wait to find out if Miss Enwright
had told him about the Dorothy Daily column. Sure enough,
it was the first thing he mentioned when he came
by to pick me up.
Speaker 1 (26:47):
That letter in the paper is Brooks It? It certainly
has me puzzled. Puzzled mister Boyton, Yes, sir, I know,
of course that you're ceed Bee, But who in the
world is Peebee?
Speaker 2 (26:59):
I got sure you get Phoebe is no flame of mine?
Fellow named Paul Bunyan.
Speaker 9 (27:09):
Into another ar, Miss.
Speaker 1 (27:10):
Brookshaw brought you by Parmalla Tap your beauty, Hope and
luster cream Campoo for soft, glamorous, caressible hair. R Miss
Brooks starring e Varden is produced by Larry Burns, written
and directed by Al Lewis, with music by Wilbur hatch.
Speaker 2 (27:28):
Men.
Speaker 1 (27:28):
Here is actual factual proof of more comfortable, actually smoother
shaves by using Palmala.
Speaker 2 (27:34):
Lather shaving cream.
Speaker 1 (27:36):
Twelve hundred and fifty one men tried the Pamala latherway
to shave described on the tube, and no matter how
they shaved before, three out of four got more comfortable
actually smoother shaves. Try Pamala lather shaving cream. See if
you don't get more comfortable, actually smoother shaves the Pamaala
lather shaving cream way or mystery Liberally laughs. Listen to
(28:01):
Mister and Missus North, the exciting fun fact adventures of
an amateur detective and his beautiful wife. Tune in Tuesday
evenings over most of these same stations, and be with
us again next week at the same time for another
comedy episode of our Miss Brooks. Cancer causes a death
every three minutes, and unless the present cancer death rate
is reduced, eighteen million living Americans will die from it.
(28:22):
This will effect on the average one out of every
two families in the United States. You can help stop
the further spread of cancer by helping the American Cancer
Society to provide more surgery, X ray and radium treatments.
So give generously to the American Cancer Society. Today, stay
tuned now for Life with Luigi, which follows. Over most
of these same stations.
Speaker 2 (28:43):
The Columbia broadcast themes at
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