When Great Men Don't Get Laid, They Build New Societies - Episode 9

There is a very real dating crisis today.Men feel it. Women feel it too.

Some of you did well back in high school or college — maybe you were attractive, mildly popular, or solid in your circles. But now? Even with enormous effort, you can’t get a decent match. The few that do come through often aren’t right… or are downright catastrophic.

Why?Because of community collapse.

And this will spark a new kind of revolution — not centralized, but decentralized.Let me explain.

PART I: Community Solves the Dating Crisis

Superficial Status vs. True Status

In tribal society, people saw you. A woman might see a man win — see how he leads with strength and love. She sees how younger men respect him. That man is attractive. Admired. Respected. His honour and opportunities grow.

That’s how it worked for hundreds of thousands of years.

But now?How many people actually see your wins, your virtues?How many even know you beyond the surface?

Most people only catch a glimpse — on a dating profile, in a checkout line, at a party.No depth. No reputation. No context.

Without community, we are all living in unfamiliar worlds.

The Unfamiliar World

Outside of college or the workplace — it’s all unfamiliar now.

I never had either of those.

So we’re left with shrinking peer groups, disconnected lives.We “date” through:

* Bars

* Clubs

* Dating apps

* Cold approaches

And we try to make friends through:

* Networking events

* Gyms

* Sports

* Brief interactions

But it doesn’t work.Social dynamics break down in unfamiliar environments.

We no longer have the time or context to really know one another. This creates a world ruled by superficial status — and that is destroying dating, friendship, marriage, and the future of civilization.

Some Real Examples

I was just at a retreat.

There was a beautiful Instagram-type woman there. One short interaction — I could tell immediately she wasn’t for me. But as the retreat went on, a woman I’d overlooked at first stole into my heart.

Another common example:

An office worker might be a well-liked, kind, quirky guy with depth and discipline — but he never gets a date outside the office. Meanwhile, the douchey co-worker everyone hates? He kills it on the dating apps.

Why?

Because apps reward superficial status, not true character.

Met a good friend in Mexico.Shy, reserved — not the usual type of guy I connect with. But once we lived together, I saw his intelligence, depth, and thoughtful nature.We vibed hard. Became great friends.

But he’s invisible in superficial spaces. Most girls pass him over instantly. (Yes, he could improve his presentation… but that’s not the full issue.)

The Truth About Status

🌞 The most insecure people chase superficial status the hardest.

They live outward-in:

* Bodybuilding

* Money

* Image

* Politics

* Sexual appeal

All based on what’s rewarded by the market.

They conform to the current icons of status, not to truth. I’ve seen it again and again. Old friends, lost in the sauce. Chasing "likes," chasing approval. All because they were insecure deep down.

Superficial status gets you short-term wins.But long-term? It hollows you out.

True Status looks like:

* Confidence, intelligence, virtue

* Humor, playfulness, wit

* Leadership, masculine edge

* Stories, scars, wisdom

Men of substance don’t pander.They individuate.

But gold doesn’t always glitter — and what glitters isn’t always gold.

That’s the frustration in today’s world.

Because real men are NOT witnessed.If they were, they’d naturally be seen as high-value.Because in community, status emerges.

My Own Experience

Allow me a moment of shameless arrogance:

In most communities, I become well-liked pretty fast.I’ve got social skills, talents. I’m grounded. I show up.

But dating in my early 20s was brutal.

Every community I was part of had older people.And the younger ones? They were all:

* In college

* Working

* On their phones

* Not going out

Even now, at 27, I go out constantly — to dances, parties, coworking spots, gyms. I say hi to everyone.

But where the f*ck are the other late-20s people actually hanging out?Where’s the real, vibrant community?

It barely exists.Maybe a run club, a boutique gym… but still too scattered. Too unfamiliar.

Status Filters the World — But Only In Community