April 25, 2025 • 29 mins
THE MELBOURNE INTERNATIONAL COMEDY FESTIVAL IS OVER (and great, don't get me wrong) but I bit off way more than I could chew during it.
In this COLD HARD FAX REVEAL I reveal how much money did I lose during the festival. What a wild ride it was.
THE PARTS:
00:00 The Introduction
04:22 Part 1: The Dream
10:53 Part 2: The Math
16:34 Part 3: The Existential Crisis
20:10 Part 4: Would I do it again.
Some algorithm text, read it or don't, it is up to you:
$redacted. That's the exact price tag of my comedy festival dream. After two years of performing at smaller venues outside Melbourne's CBD, I was determined to go big—securing the Doubletree Hilton opposite Flinders Street Station for my show "From Brunswick With Love." The location was perfect, the time slot ideal, and the potential to make $30,000 if I sold out every night seemed worth the gamble.
Reality hit hard when I tallied up the costs: $400 for festival registration, $700 wasted on ineffective Facebook ads, $260 for tech support, $168 for parking, $1,600 in venue deposits, and an additional $670 payment when ticket sales fell short. Despite performing for over 100 people throughout the run, the financial math was brutal and unforgiving.
What I discovered was far more valuable than the money lost. Post-COVID audiences were emerging from "lockdown brain" but still feeling the pressure of rising living costs. They weren't willing to take chances on solo performers without followings, instead hedging their bets on lineup shows or established names. My experience confirmed what veterans had warned me about—location and timing matter far less than audience development and show packaging.
The pressure of trying to fill that 120-seat room made me a better comedian, forcing me to elevate my game. But more importantly, it clarified what comedy truly is: not prestigious venues or perfect time slots, but one person with a microphone connecting authentically with an audience. Would I do it all again? Yes—but very differently, with a smaller venue and much less financial pressure. Sometimes you need to chase the glittering dream to discover that the real magic was in the simpler approach all along.
Subscribe to join my revolution that stands for absolutely nothing, and follow my journey as I continue chasing comedy dreams—just with better math next time.
Send me Fan Mail! It could be anything, we are desperate at this point.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Sharam Namdarian (00:00):
How much money did I lose during the Melbourne
International Comedy Festivalof 2025?
In this episode of SharamNamdarian Starts a Revolution,
we are going to find out.
This is the podcast where I,sharam Namdarian, start a
revolution without any cause,reason, rhyme or purpose,
(00:23):
whether it is intentional orinternational.
We haven't figured that out yet.
Isn't it good to stand fornothing?
Fantastic, now that we've gotthe premise of the whole podcast
out of the way.
This is crazy.
The Comedy Festival was anexpensive experience and I want
(00:47):
to sort of talk about how muchmoney did I spend.
It's not really about spending.
It's about how much money did Ilose during the Melbourne
International Comedy Festivalparts.
So the first part is what isthe dream?
So what was the original idea?
What was the outcome?
What was the things that wereat stake?
(01:10):
You know what could havehappened.
What did I want to happen?
Part two is the cold hard,semi-soft math.
So what I'm going to be talkingabout are the numbers, the
numbers of expenditure, thenumbers of what I actually spent
money on, but these are goingto be 95% accurate, so not 100%
accurate, just because, roughlyoff the top of my head, I don't
(01:32):
quite know the things like theexact numbers off the top of my
head, but I do know the 95%ballpark.
So we're going to be includingthings like photography.
We're going to be includingthings like venue hire.
We're going to be includingthings like photography.
We're going to be includingthings like venue hire.
We're going to be includingthings like what do you call it?
Texts.
We're going to be includingthings like parking.
(01:53):
So when we look at that and itall adds up, it'll be this oh
shit, okay, that's crazy.
And how much money did youactually earn?
Whoa, this ain't the podcast ofhow much money did I, um, earn
during the comedy festival?
No, no, no.
If you want that, go to someoneelse.
This is the podcast of how muchmoney did I lose during the
(02:16):
melbourne international comedyfestival.
That is a far more exciting andmore realistic premise.
Now the yeah, so we do themaths.
After that is the existentialspiral, where I me, shahram
Namdarian looks at thosesemi-soft numbers and have the
existential breakdown.
We all know that I should behaving Now four.
Would I do it again?
(02:37):
Bah, we'll cross that bridge.
We'll cross that bridge lateron.
The first thing I do want to say, though, is this podcast, this
episode, has no hate for anyone.
I know some people might bethinking straight off the bat oh
shit, he's shitting on thisperson or shitting on that
person.
No, I have no hate for anyoneor anything that I've
(03:02):
encountered along the way.
I love the comedy festival.
I am at a phase where I do needto branch out and see other
festivals.
You know what I mean.
Like, do the other things right.
But ever since I was a youngwarthog, I looked at the
festival and I was like, wow,that's so cool.
That was the goal and look,I've done it.
(03:22):
I've achieved that dream Now,and I've achieved it multiple
times.
So let's achieve other dreamsVenue, hire, all that stuff.
All the people I've worked withlove them all.
Do not.
This is not a hate.
There is no hate here.
There is no hate, there is onlylove.
And I'm only saying thatbecause people are afraid of
talking about numbers sometimesand often that can have a
(03:42):
jarring, uh emotional reaction.
So you know, like, watch any tvshow.
No tv show ever talks about howmuch money uh is ever.
How much do they pay you?
A lot, a lot, you know, becausea lot means to different people
.
So you know like, um, where youare financially might be a
different thing, and there'sdefinitely some beautiful
(04:03):
lessons I've learned along theway.
So, with act four, where we talkabout, would I do it again?
Holy, hella, moly.
I got so much to say.
But first of all, let's talkabout the dream me, sharon,
madarin, the comedy festival in2025.
What was the dream?
Now, let's to tell you what thedream was in the present tense,
(04:24):
which is technically the past.
Now, as of recording this, weneed to go even further back
into the past, which istechnically further back in the
past.
Um, this is my third comedyfestival.
Now I'm gonna say this isobviously it's the one where I'm
most qualified to perform atthe festival.
Um, but that sentence is nevernot going to be mute, because
next year I'll be more qualifiedthat qualified than I am now.
(04:47):
The first one, the first show,was called horny and depressed
and I held it at ubq on smithstreet when it was in its
slightly other location.
Uh, in collingwood now, if youdon't know where that is, in
melbourne, if you're not frommelbourne.
Love that, love that, love thatwe.
It's slightly north of the city.
The next one was in a beautifullocation called Club Voltaire,
(05:08):
if you do not know it.
Great, great location, greatpeople, great everything,
everything there.
Great, great, great, great,great.
North of the city, in NorthMelbourne, opposite from the
Comics Lounge, a huge comedyclub in Melbourne, and again out
of the city huge comedy club inMelbourne and again out of the
city.
Now, did I have walk-ins foreither venue?
(05:29):
No, I did not, and I've learnedwhy.
I had my theories about whythat's the case, and it's
post-mortem.
Not because of location, but at.
I wanted to have a comedy showthat was at a good location in a
(05:53):
good time, and the definitionof good location was in the CBD,
somewhere, the Melbournebusiness, the central business
district in Melbourne.
So that's again, if you're notin Melbournebourne, it's
basically what we call downtownor whatever.
Um and uh, in the cbd inmelbourne, at a good location,
so somewhere in the city thatwas easy to central to, um, the
(06:17):
central part of the festival.
So that's the melbourne townhall on swanson street.
Um, at a good time.
So preferably not at a timewhere people are going to be uh,
tired as time.
So preferably not at a timewhere people are going to be
tired as all hell, andpreferably not at a time that I
then would be tired as all hell.
And so, through the connectionsand through the things, I
(06:38):
managed to wrangle the venue,which is the Doubletree Hilton
opposite Flinders Street Station, at 7.40pm.
Oh, fantastic location, oh,fantastic time.
For those people not inMelbourne, flinders Street is
(06:58):
like one of the central streetsin Melbourne.
Flinders Street Station is oneof the central stations in
Melbourne.
There's Melbourne Central,which you'd think is the central
station, but there's twoFlinders Street and, yeah, so
it's opposite Flinders StreetStation.
Good location, good time,fantastico, let's-a do it.
(07:18):
That was basically the wholething.
Like I just I wanted that tohappen.
Now here, thing, like I, just Iwanted that to happen.
Now here's the catch.
Oh, you ready for the catch?
Uh, twice as expensive off thetop of my head than, say,
(07:42):
voltaire.
Twice as expensive, butVoltaire fits around 50 people.
This space fits 120 people.
That is a lot of people.
Now, the ticket price of $25 ahead.
From the rough takings I couldhave made if I sold out every
(08:05):
single show, I could have made30, 30 000.
That's a lot of coconuts 30 000.
Now, the festival itself inorder to be I just nodded myself
, sorry the festival itself, inorder to be a part of it, costs
(08:27):
around four hundred dollars, the.
The space itself costs aroundfour thousand dollars.
Now if I could make thirtythousand dollars, the, the, the
dice have been rolled.
I accepted it all.
I accepted the challenge.
I have experience in marketing,but what I do not have what I do
not have is a following.
(08:48):
I do not have a following.
I do not have a group of peoplethat I can say, hey, I'm
playing it this time, let's go.
That is what I do not have.
So I am, dare I say, rawdogging it, and that's why I'm
doing this podcast.
Shonderdarn Starts a Revolutionwhere I can create some
revolutionaries like yourself,where we fight for nothing.
That's why I'm going to bedoing more sketches, things like
(09:10):
that.
You'll see me posting more andmore online.
I do not have comedic followers,so I really wanted to sort of
get it to this point where okay,I think maybe I had something
to prove to myself like, oh, youcan do it without people
following you, you know, just toprove I'm good at marketing or
that other people are wrong.
It's all fucking pretendrealistically.
So the dream was to make itwork.
(09:32):
Now, I had many people tell meafterwards, a lot of people have
had the idea that I've had.
I'm not alone to be like here'sa huge venue, I'm gonna how am
I gonna fill it?
I'm the only one dumb enough tohave done it.
No, not, actually.
I.
Actually I think I'm special.
I know so many people who havedone enough to have done what
(09:53):
I've done.
I know so many people.
I'm not going to name them, butif you think it's you, it's
probably you.
Let's be honest.
So that was the dream Act.
One was the dream act.
One was the dream trying tobasically get this, I get it off
the ground, to make money or todare I say, at the very least,
(10:16):
break even.
That was the.
The financial dream.
The actual, like the comedicdream was deliver a good show.
Like.
I had faith in the content thejoke, sorry.
I had faith in the idea.
The show was called FromBrunswick With Love, which was
this idea, that it was meant tobe this existential crisis.
But at the same time, maybeI'll appeal to people who live
(10:39):
in Brunswick Great Acts 2.
The Math oh shit.
Answer it.
Great ax2.
The math oh shit.
Are you ready to experience themath?
Okay, so in this part we'retalking about the cold, hard
math of it all and I'm going tobe doing some calculations at
the same time, so if I can putmy microphone in a weird way, um
(11:02):
, as we've said before, this issoft math.
Okay.
So how much does it cost toregister for the festival?
I can't remember off the top ofmy head, but I'm going to say
it's around $400.
How much did I spend onFacebook ads alone?
(11:24):
Around $700.
Shit, that's a lot of kahunas.
Do you know why I spent $700 onFacebook ads?
It's because I'm a dummy.
I tried doing Facebook ads waybefore the festival.
Uh, I tried doing facebook adsway before the festival and, um,
(11:51):
I have now learned that if youare ever going to do ads, do it
like two weeks before, don't doit several months before.
All right, I've now.
That was an expensive learningexperience.
I've now learned it.
Uh, anyone who's watching thisseriously, just do it a couple
weeks beforehand.
You do not.
If you have $700 to spend onads, hypothetically like just
(12:14):
save it all, hit a higherconcentration potentially.
Again, I do not have a bigfollowing to target retarget
stuff like that, so I'm raw dogon Facebook ads.
We have, uh, the tech supportfor the whole festival.
Uh, roughly 100 and 200 and 260dollars.
(12:35):
Uh, that's what I spent on uh,on uh, two guys who really
helped me out.
Um, it's not a lot of money.
You know, there's festival pass, whatever, there's other ways
of whatever.
So so far we have the, the uh,the festival registration.
We have the uh facebook ads andwe have the text.
(13:00):
Let me just write that down soI can remember that.
So I got fest reg, we've gotfacebook adverts, we've got text
, okay.
So that's already a bit ofkahunas.
Now we have parking.
So parking roughly, I would say, equated to an average of $12 a
night, mostly because therewere some days where I paid more
(13:22):
and there were also some days,like public holidays, where I
paid nothing.
So I'm just going to sayaverage, it was $12 a night.
So that's 12 times 14 equalswhat is that?
That's 12 times 14.
Someone had me at $168, $168 aparking.
That's more than I expected.
And then we have the final, thetakings, so okay.
(13:49):
So you might be thinking, oh,yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, all
right.
So then we have deposits forthe venue.
So that was $900 times two, sothat's $1,600, yeah, so we have
the takings from the venue, sothe deposits from the venue.
(14:09):
So first we got I'll just I'llrun through it all at the end
Deposits from the venue, thatwas, two $900 payments, and then
, finally, we have the taking.
So this is how much money did Iearn?
Now, the final thing was wasthat there was so obviously
(14:32):
there's the deposits was onethousand six hundred dollars,
and then the rest of the moneyfor the venue would be taken
from tickets, and then anythingleft over would be mine.
Yeah, so, but what happensthough?
Here's the question whathappens if I don't make the
(14:57):
money back?
Well, you better believe that'swhat happened.
I serviced comedically over ahundred people, but it was not
enough money to pay the venueback, so it ended up being a
difference of around six, likeplus GST, and the GST was like
ah shit, didn't think of thatwas around $670.
(15:21):
So how much did I?
So first we've got festivalregistration, which is $400.
Facebook ads $700.
Text $260.
Parking $168.
Deposits for the venue $1,600.
And then takings.
So you'd think takings is liketaking away.
(15:41):
I actually paid $670.
So what's the total?
So it's $400 plus $700, plus$260, plus 1600 plus 67.
Are you ready to find out howmuch money did I lose during the
Melbourne International ComedyFestival?
(16:02):
3630, $3630.
Zero, three thousand sixhundred and thirty dollars less
than I thought.
So this is part three.
Part three existential crisis.
(16:26):
Three thousand six hundred andthirty dollars, $3,630.
Oh, frankly, I thought it was$4,000, plus I am broke.
(16:48):
I am broke, I am Whoa.
Okay, it's good for me to knowthe exact number, or like, again
, the soft number, like give ortake $100 or $200.
(17:14):
When you're in the $3,630 mark,an extra $100 won't?
The maths is fine, whoa, yeah,that was an expensive experience
.
Part four is would I do itagain?
(17:35):
Because I can tell you straightup I already know the answer to
that.
But this is part three, theexistential spiral.
If I had $3,630 right now, Iwould feel very financially,
(17:59):
emotionally, stable.
I've talked about this before onthe podcast, where I myself
have a tendency to bite off morethan I can chew just because
I'm used to telling myself I'mbad at chewing.
Again.
Love the venues, love thepeople.
There are people who operatedin the same venue.
(18:20):
They sold out almost everysingle night.
Shit, yeah, fantastic, lovethat for them.
Uh, yeah, okay, oh, I'm scaredabout putting this out, just in
(18:44):
case it has some negativeramifications.
To be honest, I'm scared venueswill look at this and be like
he talks about the finances.
We've got to keep it a secret.
It's like, dude, you can justask people, you just ask anyone.
Anyone will tell you there's nocontract that says you can't
(19:05):
talk about the finances duringthe festival.
It's, um, I've got to get afollowing.
I gotta get, I gotta get sofunny that that number isn't a
(19:25):
fear anymore.
Oh Okay, look, oh okay, look.
We're gonna get into part four,because I have some stuff to
say about this part four.
Would I do it again?
Part four, uh, short answer,long answer yes and no.
(19:46):
Yes, I will all, not always,but as long as I'm in town, I
would do it again.
But would I do it exactly thesame?
Hell, no, I financially do nothave currently, from my current
position, the financial space tosort of to throw this much
money willy-nilly at a thing andnot do it smarter.
(20:08):
I think being financiallylimited is itself good, because
you get to be creative withmoney.
Uh, that's where I'm at.
So you know, like I think I hadthe money to throw at it.
Now I don't have the money tothrow at it because I'm telling
you I wish like the 3630 wouldbe so good right now, you know,
(20:35):
but it did.
Look, I went for the slam dunkand I got slam punked.
I got slam dunked.
So here's what I learned.
So the whole thing, would I doit again?
Right, would I do this again?
Oh my God, would I do it again?
(20:59):
I think what I wanted was theexperience, the experience of
the good time, the good location, the venue, prestigious venue,
fantastic, fantastic, um, butwould I do that again?
I think I have the prestige now.
I I got what I needed from thatvenue, like I ate the sandwich,
(21:20):
I got the space.
Would I do that venue again?
Only if I knew I could fillthose numbers and then,
potentially at a smaller nut, ata smaller scale, that's
realistically what it would be.
I learned so much during thefestival.
At the same time we ran Best ofUnderground Comedy at Dirty
Secrets Comedy.
We sold out, not almost everysingle night, but quite
(21:42):
consistently, two shows a night,two, three shows a night.
That was right down oppositethe road from UBQ on Smith
Street, right down opposite theroad from ubq on smith street.
So what I learned this year wasthat the last couple years,
sure, cost of living wasincreasing so people have less
money to spend, but I dogenuinely believe that with the.
I don't know the way theinternet's been going recently.
(22:05):
Internet lift your fucking game.
You know, um, with trump justbeing online all the time and
suddenly the internet's boring,hollywood's not making any
things.
I think people were cravingentertainment.
So the festival this yearoverall, I think, was fantastic.
Everyone had a great like.
Not everyone, but a lot ofpeople I spoke to during the
festival had a great time.
(22:26):
Location was more irrelevantthan it's ever been.
I think the first year I everparticipated.
So the year before I starteddoing comedy and I participated
in the festival, I heard thatwas a really good one.
I think that was like we justsort of come out of lockdowns,
things like that.
So people were ready and primed.
Then, the first year that Iparticipated in the festival, I
(22:48):
think what happened was was mostpeople were having a an okay
time, but not the greatest time.
So like, uh, we were stillsuffering from maybe uh things
with like COVID sort oflockdowns, things like that.
Like we didn't have lockdownsanymore but we had.
We had like lockdown brain, youknow.
Then after that, uh, a lot ofpeople had a bad time.
(23:11):
I genuinely do believe, withthe cost of living higher and
lockdown brain, we're finallyresolving those issues.
It was, like you can see, thatpeople were going out less this
year.
I think we got over ourlockdown brain as a group of
people, but cost of living ishigher.
So overall, people were goingout.
(23:32):
People were going to shows, butthey weren't going to crazy new
experimental shows.
They were going to showsrealistically, what they were
always going to, which was showswhere they could hedge their
bets.
So shows like lineup shows,shows where it's a double act,
things like that, if it's a soloshow, the bets are a bit more
wild and looser.
So if it's a solo show, thebets are um a bit more wild and
looser.
(23:52):
So you know like, if it's ashit show, you're stuck in a
room for an hour, but if it's adouble act, at least it's only
half.
Like you got twice the chanceof being good.
If it's five people, you gotlike, okay, it's uh.
You know like if they're shit,they're gone in 10 minutes.
So you hedge your bets.
So, realistically, all thelineup shows did fantastic.
(24:13):
All the solo shows did allright if they had a following.
So I learned this festival thatmaybe what I was thinking about,
where it was like good location, good time was actually sort of
irrelevant to where it was at,it's more the good location.
Yeah.
So it's like what I learned ispackaging.
Packaging makes the thing right.
(24:33):
So, voltaire, beautifullocation, such a amazing uh room
.
It's velvet, it's soft, it's itfeels this fun elevated vibe.
You go in there, you feelelevated and it helps and
supports that.
And i've've started to realizelike, okay, so in this space,
yeah, so I could have if I ranmy show at Dirty or a
(24:56):
significantly cheaper venuewhere the potential to make
money and stuff wassignificantly less but the
potential to, you know, just doI'm going to say very honestly,
dumpster fire comedy, justcomedy at its core, which is
just a person with a microphonetalking to a bunch of people who
don't have a microphone.
(25:18):
I realized and you've seen thestart if you watched the episode
with Ashfield, I mean, where hesort of gave me a rant that
like people in Melbourne oftenlike put the festival on this
big pedestal and they get it intheir heads Like this is the
thing, this is the thing weshould be doing, because we
don't sort of like, we're likewe're looking at the fruit in
the trees.
We're not actually thinkingabout growing the trees, I can
(25:41):
tell you I probably was caughtup in that that there is glitz
and there is glam to thefestival, but the festival at
its core is just people tellingother people jokes.
And maybe next year you'll seeme in a significantly smaller
(26:04):
room, not because I'm broke,mostly because I'm broke, mostly
because I'm broke, but alsobecause, to me, I've realized
like that's it, all of thisextra stuff that we put on it,
the glitz, the glam style, styleof performance, comes down.
(26:26):
It's all extra and at the coreof it it's just two people, like
one person performing and agroup of people listening.
Dude, sometimes not even agroup of people, sometimes one
person, sometimes othercomedians, depending on where
you're at.
So would I do it again?
I think I don't need to do itagain.
I think that's really what I'mtrying to say here.
(26:48):
I don't need to do it again.
I think that's really what I'mtrying to say here.
I don't need to do it again.
I got what I needed out of thisone.
You know, once I experienced theglitz and the glam of a great
venue, great location, greattime, my cup-eth runneth full.
Now I can be like, yeah, Iwould also have more breaks.
(27:17):
I did two weeks straight in arow.
That was rough as guts.
You need a break.
You need at least, like, starton the Monday, have the Tuesday
off or start on the Tuesdaywhatever.
Like, like, don't do Mondays.
I think that's an easy way ofsaying it.
Just don't do Mondays.
Monday crowds are rough anywaybecause everyone's like it's a
Monday and you're like you gotto deal with that too.
(27:37):
That's fine, whatever.
But it is like the whole journeywas a very expensive learning
experience, but I learned somuch out of it.
Did I learn $3,600 and 30things out of it?
(27:58):
Experience points out of it.
You better believe I did.
You know I was saying I spent$700 on Facebook adverts by the
time we got to the festival.
The freaking out about thenumbers itself made me a better
comedian, because I'm like if Igot to fill this space, I've got
(28:21):
to be able to fill that space.
I got so much better, so muchmore calmer.
So yeah, should you do crazybig ass stunts, man, if you can
afford it maybe.
All I know is is that I need totouch some fucking grass and be
(28:42):
more connected with what comedyreally is.
The glitz, the glam, all thatextra stuff is extra.
It's the stuff that comes as aside effect from just doing
spots, writing jokes, gettingout there, meeting people.
(29:03):
The real thing, though and Iwill say this over and over
again, and I say this to so manypeople it's amazing how much
just trying to write jokessolves comedy problems, like
I've realized like the premiseof the show could have been
better, the idea behind it, allthe jokes, everything could be
(29:29):
better.
I'm probably never going to behappy with that, and I think
that's great, because that meansI'm always striving for more.
How much money did I lose during the Melbourne
International Comedy Festivalof 2025?
In this episode of SharamNamdarian Starts a Revolution,
we are going to find out.
This is the podcast where I,sharam Namdarian, start a
revolution without any cause,reason, rhyme or purpose,
(00:23):
whether it is intentional orinternational.
We haven't figured that out yet.
Isn't it good to stand fornothing?
Fantastic, now that we've gotthe premise of the whole podcast
out of the way.
This is crazy.
The Comedy Festival was anexpensive experience and I want
(00:47):
to sort of talk about how muchmoney did I spend.
It's not really about spending.
It's about how much money did Ilose during the Melbourne
International Comedy Festivalparts.
So the first part is what isthe dream?
So what was the original idea?
What was the outcome?
What was the things that wereat stake?
(01:10):
You know what could havehappened.
What did I want to happen?
Part two is the cold hard,semi-soft math.
So what I'm going to be talkingabout are the numbers, the
numbers of expenditure, thenumbers of what I actually spent
money on, but these are goingto be 95% accurate, so not 100%
accurate, just because, roughlyoff the top of my head, I don't
(01:32):
quite know the things like theexact numbers off the top of my
head, but I do know the 95%ballpark.
So we're going to be includingthings like photography.
We're going to be includingthings like venue hire.
We're going to be includingthings like photography.
We're going to be includingthings like venue hire.
We're going to be includingthings like what do you call it?
Texts.
We're going to be includingthings like parking.
(01:53):
So when we look at that and itall adds up, it'll be this oh
shit, okay, that's crazy.
And how much money did youactually earn?
Whoa, this ain't the podcast ofhow much money did I, um, earn
during the comedy festival?
No, no, no.
If you want that, go to someoneelse.
This is the podcast of how muchmoney did I lose during the
(02:16):
melbourne international comedyfestival.
That is a far more exciting andmore realistic premise.
Now the yeah, so we do themaths.
After that is the existentialspiral, where I me, shahram
Namdarian looks at thosesemi-soft numbers and have the
existential breakdown.
We all know that I should behaving Now four.
Would I do it again?
(02:37):
Bah, we'll cross that bridge.
We'll cross that bridge lateron.
The first thing I do want to say, though, is this podcast, this
episode, has no hate for anyone.
I know some people might bethinking straight off the bat oh
shit, he's shitting on thisperson or shitting on that
person.
No, I have no hate for anyoneor anything that I've
(03:02):
encountered along the way.
I love the comedy festival.
I am at a phase where I do needto branch out and see other
festivals.
You know what I mean.
Like, do the other things right.
But ever since I was a youngwarthog, I looked at the
festival and I was like, wow,that's so cool.
That was the goal and look,I've done it.
(03:22):
I've achieved that dream Now,and I've achieved it multiple
times.
So let's achieve other dreamsVenue, hire, all that stuff.
All the people I've worked withlove them all.
Do not.
This is not a hate.
There is no hate here.
There is no hate, there is onlylove.
And I'm only saying thatbecause people are afraid of
talking about numbers sometimesand often that can have a
(03:42):
jarring, uh emotional reaction.
So you know, like, watch any tvshow.
No tv show ever talks about howmuch money uh is ever.
How much do they pay you?
A lot, a lot, you know, becausea lot means to different people
.
So you know like, um, where youare financially might be a
different thing, and there'sdefinitely some beautiful
(04:03):
lessons I've learned along theway.
So, with act four, where we talkabout, would I do it again?
Holy, hella, moly.
I got so much to say.
But first of all, let's talkabout the dream me, sharon,
madarin, the comedy festival in2025.
What was the dream?
Now, let's to tell you what thedream was in the present tense,
(04:24):
which is technically the past.
Now, as of recording this, weneed to go even further back
into the past, which istechnically further back in the
past.
Um, this is my third comedyfestival.
Now I'm gonna say this isobviously it's the one where I'm
most qualified to perform atthe festival.
Um, but that sentence is nevernot going to be mute, because
next year I'll be more qualifiedthat qualified than I am now.
(04:47):
The first one, the first show,was called horny and depressed
and I held it at ubq on smithstreet when it was in its
slightly other location.
Uh, in collingwood now, if youdon't know where that is, in
melbourne, if you're not frommelbourne.
Love that, love that, love thatwe.
It's slightly north of the city.
The next one was in a beautifullocation called Club Voltaire,
(05:08):
if you do not know it.
Great, great location, greatpeople, great everything,
everything there.
Great, great, great, great,great.
North of the city, in NorthMelbourne, opposite from the
Comics Lounge, a huge comedyclub in Melbourne, and again out
of the city huge comedy club inMelbourne and again out of the
city.
Now, did I have walk-ins foreither venue?
(05:29):
No, I did not, and I've learnedwhy.
I had my theories about whythat's the case, and it's
post-mortem.
Not because of location, but at.
I wanted to have a comedy showthat was at a good location in a
(05:53):
good time, and the definitionof good location was in the CBD,
somewhere, the Melbournebusiness, the central business
district in Melbourne.
So that's again, if you're notin Melbournebourne, it's
basically what we call downtownor whatever.
Um and uh, in the cbd inmelbourne, at a good location,
so somewhere in the city thatwas easy to central to, um, the
(06:17):
central part of the festival.
So that's the melbourne townhall on swanson street.
Um, at a good time.
So preferably not at a timewhere people are going to be uh,
tired as time.
So preferably not at a timewhere people are going to be
tired as all hell, andpreferably not at a time that I
then would be tired as all hell.
And so, through the connectionsand through the things, I
(06:38):
managed to wrangle the venue,which is the Doubletree Hilton
opposite Flinders Street Station, at 7.40pm.
Oh, fantastic location, oh,fantastic time.
For those people not inMelbourne, flinders Street is
(06:58):
like one of the central streetsin Melbourne.
Flinders Street Station is oneof the central stations in
Melbourne.
There's Melbourne Central,which you'd think is the central
station, but there's twoFlinders Street and, yeah, so
it's opposite Flinders StreetStation.
Good location, good time,fantastico, let's-a do it.
(07:18):
That was basically the wholething.
Like I just I wanted that tohappen.
Now here, thing, like I, just Iwanted that to happen.
Now here's the catch.
Oh, you ready for the catch?
Uh, twice as expensive off thetop of my head than, say,
(07:42):
voltaire.
Twice as expensive, butVoltaire fits around 50 people.
This space fits 120 people.
That is a lot of people.
Now, the ticket price of $25 ahead.
From the rough takings I couldhave made if I sold out every
(08:05):
single show, I could have made30, 30 000.
That's a lot of coconuts 30 000.
Now, the festival itself inorder to be I just nodded myself
, sorry the festival itself, inorder to be a part of it, costs
(08:27):
around four hundred dollars, the.
The space itself costs aroundfour thousand dollars.
Now if I could make thirtythousand dollars, the, the, the
dice have been rolled.
I accepted it all.
I accepted the challenge.
I have experience in marketing,but what I do not have what I do
not have is a following.
(08:48):
I do not have a following.
I do not have a group of peoplethat I can say, hey, I'm
playing it this time, let's go.
That is what I do not have.
So I am, dare I say, rawdogging it, and that's why I'm
doing this podcast.
Shonderdarn Starts a Revolutionwhere I can create some
revolutionaries like yourself,where we fight for nothing.
That's why I'm going to bedoing more sketches, things like
(09:10):
that.
You'll see me posting more andmore online.
I do not have comedic followers,so I really wanted to sort of
get it to this point where okay,I think maybe I had something
to prove to myself like, oh, youcan do it without people
following you, you know, just toprove I'm good at marketing or
that other people are wrong.
It's all fucking pretendrealistically.
So the dream was to make itwork.
(09:32):
Now, I had many people tell meafterwards, a lot of people have
had the idea that I've had.
I'm not alone to be like here'sa huge venue, I'm gonna how am
I gonna fill it?
I'm the only one dumb enough tohave done it.
No, not, actually.
I.
Actually I think I'm special.
I know so many people who havedone enough to have done what
(09:53):
I've done.
I know so many people.
I'm not going to name them, butif you think it's you, it's
probably you.
Let's be honest.
So that was the dream Act.
One was the dream act.
One was the dream trying tobasically get this, I get it off
the ground, to make money or todare I say, at the very least,
(10:16):
break even.
That was the.
The financial dream.
The actual, like the comedicdream was deliver a good show.
Like.
I had faith in the content thejoke, sorry.
I had faith in the idea.
The show was called FromBrunswick With Love, which was
this idea, that it was meant tobe this existential crisis.
But at the same time, maybeI'll appeal to people who live
(10:39):
in Brunswick Great Acts 2.
The Math oh shit.
Answer it.
Great ax2.
The math oh shit.
Are you ready to experience themath?
Okay, so in this part we'retalking about the cold, hard
math of it all and I'm going tobe doing some calculations at
the same time, so if I can putmy microphone in a weird way, um
(11:02):
, as we've said before, this issoft math.
Okay.
So how much does it cost toregister for the festival?
I can't remember off the top ofmy head, but I'm going to say
it's around $400.
How much did I spend onFacebook ads alone?
(11:24):
Around $700.
Shit, that's a lot of kahunas.
Do you know why I spent $700 onFacebook ads?
It's because I'm a dummy.
I tried doing Facebook ads waybefore the festival.
Uh, I tried doing facebook adsway before the festival and, um,
(11:51):
I have now learned that if youare ever going to do ads, do it
like two weeks before, don't doit several months before.
All right, I've now.
That was an expensive learningexperience.
I've now learned it.
Uh, anyone who's watching thisseriously, just do it a couple
weeks beforehand.
You do not.
If you have $700 to spend onads, hypothetically like just
(12:14):
save it all, hit a higherconcentration potentially.
Again, I do not have a bigfollowing to target retarget
stuff like that, so I'm raw dogon Facebook ads.
We have, uh, the tech supportfor the whole festival.
Uh, roughly 100 and 200 and 260dollars.
(12:35):
Uh, that's what I spent on uh,on uh, two guys who really
helped me out.
Um, it's not a lot of money.
You know, there's festival pass, whatever, there's other ways
of whatever.
So so far we have the, the uh,the festival registration.
We have the uh facebook ads andwe have the text.
(13:00):
Let me just write that down soI can remember that.
So I got fest reg, we've gotfacebook adverts, we've got text
, okay.
So that's already a bit ofkahunas.
Now we have parking.
So parking roughly, I would say, equated to an average of $12 a
night, mostly because therewere some days where I paid more
(13:22):
and there were also some days,like public holidays, where I
paid nothing.
So I'm just going to sayaverage, it was $12 a night.
So that's 12 times 14 equalswhat is that?
That's 12 times 14.
Someone had me at $168, $168 aparking.
That's more than I expected.
And then we have the final, thetakings, so okay.
(13:49):
So you might be thinking, oh,yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, all
right.
So then we have deposits forthe venue.
So that was $900 times two, sothat's $1,600, yeah, so we have
the takings from the venue, sothe deposits from the venue.
(14:09):
So first we got I'll just I'llrun through it all at the end
Deposits from the venue, thatwas, two $900 payments, and then
, finally, we have the taking.
So this is how much money did Iearn?
Now, the final thing was wasthat there was so obviously
(14:32):
there's the deposits was onethousand six hundred dollars,
and then the rest of the moneyfor the venue would be taken
from tickets, and then anythingleft over would be mine.
Yeah, so, but what happensthough?
Here's the question whathappens if I don't make the
(14:57):
money back?
Well, you better believe that'swhat happened.
I serviced comedically over ahundred people, but it was not
enough money to pay the venueback, so it ended up being a
difference of around six, likeplus GST, and the GST was like
ah shit, didn't think of thatwas around $670.
(15:21):
So how much did I?
So first we've got festivalregistration, which is $400.
Facebook ads $700.
Text $260.
Parking $168.
Deposits for the venue $1,600.
And then takings.
So you'd think takings is liketaking away.
(15:41):
I actually paid $670.
So what's the total?
So it's $400 plus $700, plus$260, plus 1600 plus 67.
Are you ready to find out howmuch money did I lose during the
Melbourne International ComedyFestival?
(16:02):
3630, $3630.
Zero, three thousand sixhundred and thirty dollars less
than I thought.
So this is part three.
Part three existential crisis.
(16:26):
Three thousand six hundred andthirty dollars, $3,630.
Oh, frankly, I thought it was$4,000, plus I am broke.
(16:48):
I am broke, I am Whoa.
Okay, it's good for me to knowthe exact number, or like, again
, the soft number, like give ortake $100 or $200.
(17:14):
When you're in the $3,630 mark,an extra $100 won't?
The maths is fine, whoa, yeah,that was an expensive experience
.
Part four is would I do itagain?
(17:35):
Because I can tell you straightup I already know the answer to
that.
But this is part three, theexistential spiral.
If I had $3,630 right now, Iwould feel very financially,
(17:59):
emotionally, stable.
I've talked about this before onthe podcast, where I myself
have a tendency to bite off morethan I can chew just because
I'm used to telling myself I'mbad at chewing.
Again.
Love the venues, love thepeople.
There are people who operatedin the same venue.
(18:20):
They sold out almost everysingle night.
Shit, yeah, fantastic, lovethat for them.
Uh, yeah, okay, oh, I'm scaredabout putting this out, just in
(18:44):
case it has some negativeramifications.
To be honest, I'm scared venueswill look at this and be like
he talks about the finances.
We've got to keep it a secret.
It's like, dude, you can justask people, you just ask anyone.
Anyone will tell you there's nocontract that says you can't
(19:05):
talk about the finances duringthe festival.
It's, um, I've got to get afollowing.
I gotta get, I gotta get sofunny that that number isn't a
(19:25):
fear anymore.
Oh Okay, look, oh okay, look.
We're gonna get into part four,because I have some stuff to
say about this part four.
Would I do it again?
Part four, uh, short answer,long answer yes and no.
(19:46):
Yes, I will all, not always,but as long as I'm in town, I
would do it again.
But would I do it exactly thesame?
Hell, no, I financially do nothave currently, from my current
position, the financial space tosort of to throw this much
money willy-nilly at a thing andnot do it smarter.
(20:08):
I think being financiallylimited is itself good, because
you get to be creative withmoney.
Uh, that's where I'm at.
So you know, like I think I hadthe money to throw at it.
Now I don't have the money tothrow at it because I'm telling
you I wish like the 3630 wouldbe so good right now, you know,
(20:35):
but it did.
Look, I went for the slam dunkand I got slam punked.
I got slam dunked.
So here's what I learned.
So the whole thing, would I doit again?
Right, would I do this again?
Oh my God, would I do it again?
(20:59):
I think what I wanted was theexperience, the experience of
the good time, the good location, the venue, prestigious venue,
fantastic, fantastic, um, butwould I do that again?
I think I have the prestige now.
I I got what I needed from thatvenue, like I ate the sandwich,
(21:20):
I got the space.
Would I do that venue again?
Only if I knew I could fillthose numbers and then,
potentially at a smaller nut, ata smaller scale, that's
realistically what it would be.
I learned so much during thefestival.
At the same time we ran Best ofUnderground Comedy at Dirty
Secrets Comedy.
We sold out, not almost everysingle night, but quite
(21:42):
consistently, two shows a night,two, three shows a night.
That was right down oppositethe road from UBQ on Smith
Street, right down opposite theroad from ubq on smith street.
So what I learned this year wasthat the last couple years,
sure, cost of living wasincreasing so people have less
money to spend, but I dogenuinely believe that with the.
I don't know the way theinternet's been going recently.
(22:05):
Internet lift your fucking game.
You know, um, with trump justbeing online all the time and
suddenly the internet's boring,hollywood's not making any
things.
I think people were cravingentertainment.
So the festival this yearoverall, I think, was fantastic.
Everyone had a great like.
Not everyone, but a lot ofpeople I spoke to during the
festival had a great time.
(22:26):
Location was more irrelevantthan it's ever been.
I think the first year I everparticipated.
So the year before I starteddoing comedy and I participated
in the festival, I heard thatwas a really good one.
I think that was like we justsort of come out of lockdowns,
things like that.
So people were ready and primed.
Then, the first year that Iparticipated in the festival, I
(22:48):
think what happened was was mostpeople were having a an okay
time, but not the greatest time.
So like, uh, we were stillsuffering from maybe uh things
with like COVID sort oflockdowns, things like that.
Like we didn't have lockdownsanymore but we had.
We had like lockdown brain, youknow.
Then after that, uh, a lot ofpeople had a bad time.
(23:11):
I genuinely do believe, withthe cost of living higher and
lockdown brain, we're finallyresolving those issues.
It was, like you can see, thatpeople were going out less this
year.
I think we got over ourlockdown brain as a group of
people, but cost of living ishigher.
So overall, people were goingout.
(23:32):
People were going to shows, butthey weren't going to crazy new
experimental shows.
They were going to showsrealistically, what they were
always going to, which was showswhere they could hedge their
bets.
So shows like lineup shows,shows where it's a double act,
things like that, if it's a soloshow, the bets are a bit more
wild and looser.
So if it's a solo show, thebets are um a bit more wild and
looser.
(23:52):
So you know like, if it's ashit show, you're stuck in a
room for an hour, but if it's adouble act, at least it's only
half.
Like you got twice the chanceof being good.
If it's five people, you gotlike, okay, it's uh.
You know like if they're shit,they're gone in 10 minutes.
So you hedge your bets.
So, realistically, all thelineup shows did fantastic.
(24:13):
All the solo shows did allright if they had a following.
So I learned this festival thatmaybe what I was thinking about,
where it was like good location, good time was actually sort of
irrelevant to where it was at,it's more the good location.
Yeah.
So it's like what I learned ispackaging.
Packaging makes the thing right.
(24:33):
So, voltaire, beautifullocation, such a amazing uh room
.
It's velvet, it's soft, it's itfeels this fun elevated vibe.
You go in there, you feelelevated and it helps and
supports that.
And i've've started to realizelike, okay, so in this space,
yeah, so I could have if I ranmy show at Dirty or a
(24:56):
significantly cheaper venuewhere the potential to make
money and stuff wassignificantly less but the
potential to, you know, just doI'm going to say very honestly,
dumpster fire comedy, justcomedy at its core, which is
just a person with a microphonetalking to a bunch of people who
don't have a microphone.
(25:18):
I realized and you've seen thestart if you watched the episode
with Ashfield, I mean, where hesort of gave me a rant that
like people in Melbourne oftenlike put the festival on this
big pedestal and they get it intheir heads Like this is the
thing, this is the thing weshould be doing, because we
don't sort of like, we're likewe're looking at the fruit in
the trees.
We're not actually thinkingabout growing the trees, I can
(25:41):
tell you I probably was caughtup in that that there is glitz
and there is glam to thefestival, but the festival at
its core is just people tellingother people jokes.
And maybe next year you'll seeme in a significantly smaller
(26:04):
room, not because I'm broke,mostly because I'm broke, mostly
because I'm broke, but alsobecause, to me, I've realized
like that's it, all of thisextra stuff that we put on it,
the glitz, the glam style, styleof performance, comes down.
(26:26):
It's all extra and at the coreof it it's just two people, like
one person performing and agroup of people listening.
Dude, sometimes not even agroup of people, sometimes one
person, sometimes othercomedians, depending on where
you're at.
So would I do it again?
I think I don't need to do itagain.
I think that's really what I'mtrying to say here.
(26:48):
I don't need to do it again.
I think that's really what I'mtrying to say here.
I don't need to do it again.
I got what I needed out of thisone.
You know, once I experienced theglitz and the glam of a great
venue, great location, greattime, my cup-eth runneth full.
Now I can be like, yeah, Iwould also have more breaks.
(27:17):
I did two weeks straight in arow.
That was rough as guts.
You need a break.
You need at least, like, starton the Monday, have the Tuesday
off or start on the Tuesdaywhatever.
Like, like, don't do Mondays.
I think that's an easy way ofsaying it.
Just don't do Mondays.
Monday crowds are rough anywaybecause everyone's like it's a
Monday and you're like you gotto deal with that too.
(27:37):
That's fine, whatever.
But it is like the whole journeywas a very expensive learning
experience, but I learned somuch out of it.
Did I learn $3,600 and 30things out of it?
(27:58):
Experience points out of it.
You better believe I did.
You know I was saying I spent$700 on Facebook adverts by the
time we got to the festival.
The freaking out about thenumbers itself made me a better
comedian, because I'm like if Igot to fill this space, I've got
(28:21):
to be able to fill that space.
I got so much better, so muchmore calmer.
So yeah, should you do crazybig ass stunts, man, if you can
afford it maybe.
All I know is is that I need totouch some fucking grass and be
(28:42):
more connected with what comedyreally is.
The glitz, the glam, all thatextra stuff is extra.
It's the stuff that comes as aside effect from just doing
spots, writing jokes, gettingout there, meeting people.
(29:03):
The real thing, though and Iwill say this over and over
again, and I say this to so manypeople it's amazing how much
just trying to write jokessolves comedy problems, like
I've realized like the premiseof the show could have been
better, the idea behind it, allthe jokes, everything could be
(29:29):
better.
I'm probably never going to behappy with that, and I think
that's great, because that meansI'm always striving for more.
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