February 6, 2024 • 58 mins
Thank you so much to Max for commissioning this episode!
So this episode is one of those where I'm trying to simply enjoy the story in a vacuum, because it's one of the first glaring inconsistencies that I've really seen from the show. I'm sure there have been other plot holes that I have missed, but this time around I spotted one and I wonder if you all remember what I am referencing.
Thanks so much for listening, and I will see you soon with a new episode!
So this episode is one of those where I'm trying to simply enjoy the story in a vacuum, because it's one of the first glaring inconsistencies that I've really seen from the show. I'm sure there have been other plot holes that I have missed, but this time around I spotted one and I wonder if you all remember what I am referencing.
Thanks so much for listening, and I will see you soon with a new episode!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:02):
This is an unspoiled network podcast. This is spoil Me
covering what we do in The Shadows, Season five, episode two,
A night out with the guys. In this episode, well,
I was wondering how long it was going to take
(00:24):
for Gama's secret to get brought into the light, and
it turns out it's only partially out, but it's enough
out that I'm already worried. Welcome to spoil Me. Welcome
(01:01):
to the show everyone. I am Natasha. Thank you very
much to Max for commissioning this episode. Guys this season
is I am really excited. I really am. I think
that I hadn't realized how it had kind of gotten old,
(01:24):
what was going on with Guillermo always being put off
and being like the sad boy, and had just accepted, like, well,
this is the shick that we're going with, and you know,
he still is the sad boy. That's kind of the
brilliant thing is like despite it all, he's still things
haven't really like turned a corner for him. But this
(01:46):
whole like secret and the way that nobody really understands
what's happening and why I am so here for it,
and I feel like this is the strongest plotline that
has ever sort of carried the season from the beginning.
I'm hoping so much that it lasts and that we
(02:08):
don't just you know, sort of turn a corner and
it falls apart after like episode four, But we'll see.
So this episode, I have some questions, and I'm really
curious about whether or not anybody else has the same questions,
because y'all, this show has been pretty uh consistent most
(02:36):
of the time about like character stuff and the lore,
and they don't really tend to fuck that up too
too badly. But there was an episode in was it
the first season or the second whatever episode it was
(02:57):
that when they all get caught by animal Control. In
that episode, it is explicitly said by Nandor that he
is not good at doing hypnosis, and he attempts to
do it and it doesn't really work. And that's like
(03:17):
a couple of times he tries it and just kind
of fails at him, and eventually it's Laslow. I believe
that has to step in and do it. If it's
not Laslow, then it's not it's one of the two.
Because I know for a fact that Nandor was the
(03:40):
one saying confessing that he wasn't that good at it,
and I believe that the context of it was sort
of Guillermo being like admiring about it and him being
a bit embarrassed at the fact that he just isn't
super proficient. Yo, what happened? Why are we now turning
(04:04):
it around to be the opposite? Did they just forget?
Is that? Just like I kept waiting for this to
be a bit. I was gonna say a bit of
a but no, Honestly, I kept waiting for this to
be a bit, for it to turn out like, oh, yeah,
(04:25):
I used to be really good at it and I'm
not anymore or whatever, And it turns out that like
the writers, I think, just straight up forgot that whole
thing ever happened? And for that reason, normally this kind
(04:47):
of thing, I'm just like, oh, they clearly forgot. Lol,
it happens. Doesn't bother me. But unfortunately, like a whole
plotline in this episode relies the fact explicitly specifically that
Nandor is much better at it than Laslow, and that
(05:09):
Laslow's jealous and has been jealous for a while. And
so thus I'm sorry, as much as I would like
to just sort of handwave that this, you know, is
a mistake that we fucked up and it's not a
big deal. I can't do that when you make it
(05:30):
the whole episode, And it's a shame because the episode
is actually quite fun, like that plotline is really enjoyable
and hilarious, but because it's predicated on something that has
been contradicted by an earlier script, it just feels, really,
(05:54):
it feels really sloppy. That's the word I want, is
just that it feels really sloppy. And I am not
like you know, I cover the show an episode at
a time, and because I cover it this way, there
is a possibility that I am picking up on things
that other people might not, and so I might be
(06:16):
a bit more picky about certain things than average. But
I don't. I don't feel like the way that I
talk about some of these episodes would make it so
that I remember ridiculous, tiny nothing details that nobody's going
to remember. I feel like if I were to search, hey,
(06:41):
wasn't nandor supposed to be bad at doing like hypnotism,
I feel like I'm going to stumble across a bunch
of like Reddit posts where people have noticed this as well.
It was not a nothing detail. It was sort of
like a key point in that episode because the fact
that he was not good at it was what made
(07:02):
it so that they couldn't get out of animal control,
and so like it was a key plot point for
that episode as well in a way. So you know,
just I have to come out of the gate and
say that as much as that like plot was super fun,
(07:22):
and I'm going to talk about it and just sort
of set aside that it doesn't really make sense with
the context of everything I It bothered me when I
realized that apparently nobody else remembered the thing that I
thought was like going to turn out to be part
of the joke. So it just just I'm sorry for it.
(07:48):
I don't like being this way. What can you do?
So this the start of this episode is kind of
mocking Nandor because he keeps on falling back on mesmerizing people,
when in fact, a lot of the situations that he
(08:12):
winds up in are his own fault if he had
just kept his mouth shut, if he had just guarded
his tongue at all. And to be fair, throughout the episode,
we see that as much as Laslo may be saying
all of this because he's jealous. He isn't wrong, and
even Nandor can see it. There's just a whole like
(08:36):
series of moments where he just blurts shit out and
eventually they do wind up in a place where it's like, Okay,
I kind of think that we have to mesmerize somebody
to get out of this situation. But it's a you know,
a really really particularly bad moment, and it's not the norm,
(09:01):
which apparently has it has become for Nandor. It's the
norm for him to just like go out here and
just completely hypnotize everybody all the time. So I also like,
that's the opening we get as that's the cold open,
and then we get the credits, and I had forgotten
(09:21):
to mention that Evil Mabel is in the opening credits. Now.
I meant to say something about it last episode, because
I you know, I don't think she was in opening
credits this season before. I may be wrong about that,
but I forgot to mention it because she's not actually
(09:42):
in the episode, and that turns out to be part
of the thing when she shows up here, because it
is really funny, you guys, she's just trying to like
become part of the gang and they are excluding her,
but it's not totally clear what the deal is and
(10:03):
why they feel like they don't want her around. There
are times where there's like characters who are extremely obnoxious
and everybody's just sort of like, yeah, we all agree, no,
thank you, we don't want to involve this person in
our lives, and we're all completely in agreement on that.
This isn't one like she's perfectly friendly and not obnoxious.
(10:29):
It doesn't feel like she's super pushy. It feels like
they are all just lazy and oblivious more than anything.
And I was just not really sure if like it.
Maybe it's also the fact that she's sort of part
of the establishment. Is that it like that they just
(10:51):
don't kind of want her around because she is part
of the uh, the bosses, and it's like she's I
won't say that she's spying exactly, but maybe it could
feel like that, like she's a bit of a narc
I don't know. Regardless, though, the episode is mostly to
do with her, well not mostly, but her plotline is
(11:13):
mostly to do with the fact that she was apparently
hoping that they would invite her to stay in the house,
and they haven't done that, as she puts it, because
there's some zoning regulation where only four vampires can live
in the house at once and they can't have a fifth.
(11:34):
And she's just like, yeah, it's, you know, a zoning
thing that they were talking about but I've never really
heard of, and of course, like it's not real. And
the thing that's kind of what made me go hold
on a second, because it's one thing if you are
telling her this because you find her so annoying, and
you are just inventing more and more elaborate ways to
(11:57):
keep her out of your household, but she just doesn't
seem that bad, so coming up with more and more
elaborate ways. I was like, but why, guys, isn't it
just easier to like have her around. She's kind of
enjoyable and she's also like a horny weirdo, just like
all of you. I feel like it works. I don't know,
(12:21):
but we don't get there right away. I just had
to talk about that out of the gate. I do
enjoy this plot line. The thing that we start off
with is Nadyat just bemoaning her life, and she keeps
talking as if everything that has happened to her is
pure circumstance, and that she is just the victim of it,
(12:44):
and that there was nothing that could have been done
to prevent any of it. And if there had been
something that could have been done, everybody else should have
been the one to do it, but none of them did,
so they let her down. It's just a lot of
poor me. All everything's going wrong and nothing is ever
going to change. Yet another moment when Nandor starts to
(13:06):
suggest mesmerism to solve her problems, and it's pretty like
I always am a fan in this show of the
moments when Naja gets to be particularly ridiculous, because she
can be the one that's like got her head on
straight most of the time, so when they sort of
(13:28):
let her go into her her more goofy moments, I
am very very into it. You know. It's just fun
to watch her, especially annoy everybody else, because even when
she is being silly, she doesn't tend to get to
be annoying, which I don't know if that's so much
(13:54):
a thing about her character or if it's really speaking
more to the fact that like these days, writing women
like as just the annoying one, especially when it's one
woman in a house with three other dude characters. Maybe
making her the annoying one isn't exactly like a great look.
(14:18):
I don't know how much that's like, particularly a consideration
of theirs, but it did occur to me. So, yeah,
she's just like whining, and she's talking about all these
different things that happened and how her you know, her
sister's legs got crushed. Meanwhile, her dolla is like, yeah,
but but you did that, you remember doing it right,
(14:42):
Like everybody is just going, yeah, well we tried to
stop you. Yeah, and we told you that was a
bad idea, And she's just talking over them as if
they aren't even there. So this leads later to a
whole thing where she is, and it seems to me
(15:03):
like Mabel planted this thing, right. I don't know exactly
how she made it so that this thing kept returning
even though it was being torn up or thrown in
the trash. I feel like there has to be something
genuinely magical about it, but I don't know how that works,
because they have access, Like there was that whole library
(15:24):
full of basically magical items, so maybe there was something
in there. But the fact is that, like Naja recognized
the woman in the photo, and what are the odds
of that. I just don't know how, you know what
I'm saying, I don't know how much that is something
that can be explained. So if there is a theory
out there that or maybe we get told exactly how
(15:46):
this went down at some point and I'm just I
haven't gotten there yet. I don't know, but uh, I
really am curious about like how it felt like the
way that evil looks at the camera when they translate
what it says on the picture frame. It felt like
(16:07):
she was kind of doing a whole hey see what
I did there, like a little wink and a nudge,
which led me to believe that she had set this
all up. And I don't know how she did it,
Like maybe this was something that she left and got
the stuff ahead of time before proposing it all. I
(16:28):
don't know. I don't know, but anyway, it doesn't really
matter that much. So in the end, the suggestion that
she makes is that, oh, there is a probably a
hex on you. And when nug is like, do you
mean a curse, She's like, no, no, no, A curse
(16:51):
is just something that losers make up when their lives
are going wrong so that they don't feel like so
much of a loser. But the hexes are very very real,
and so she pretends that she's like sensing some energy
in the room. And again I'm pretending. I'm saying pretend
(17:12):
because I am pretty sure that she set all of
this up. But I'm just unclear on exactly how the
it keeps appearing. Just did she just make like ten
of them and keep putting it in place because she
knew that was going to happen, that the instinct was
going to be to destroy it. Maybe that's all it is.
I don't know, But she like shows Naja this photo
(17:38):
and naj just says, this is Yahya Nyika in Anti Paxos.
She was a very bad luck woman, a real shitstir
How did this get here? And she tries to tear
it up and throw it away, and it's back again,
and she throws the whole thing into the fire, and
(18:00):
it's back again, over and over and over again, until
eventually it suggested that maybe she should translate what it
says on the outside of the frame, But because she
can't remember, it has been so long since she has
spoken this language that she doesn't recall how to speak
(18:20):
it until they wind up going to Little Anti Paxos,
where she suddenly it like comes flooding back to her.
And the reason that she finds out about that is
because she goes over to talk to Colin Robinson and
see if he can do a translation using his computer,
(18:42):
and he's like, well, why don't you just go to
Little Antipaxos? And at first she just thinks he's fucking
with her, and she like smacks him on the back
of the head and it's just like, yeah, why don't
I just do that? Shut the fuck up, idiot, And
he's like, no, I'm really asking why wouldn't you go
do that? And she finds out that like fifteen minutes
(19:05):
away is Little Anti Paxos and she had no idea
the whole time that she has been living here for
however many years, and she's so mad at him and
he's just like, well, you never asked. So they go
over there. It's really actually kind of adorable. She's like
wandering around, looking really fondly at everything and just kind
(19:29):
of I can't believe it all looks just like it
like I feel like I'm home again. There's all this
cheap shit and old fish. It's like looking out like
my childhood bedroom window. And she takes like a little
bite of some kind of grilled meat and vomits copiously.
(19:53):
Oh my god, horrible, you guys. I every time that
they do this bit, it's a combination of like the
sound effect of the splattering and the very real kind
of sound that the actor makes, and it I don't
like it. I just don't like it at all. And
(20:14):
she like this reaction comes the instant after she takes
a teeny tiny nibble and then she just puts the
like little what do you call it kibob? I guess
she puts it back and it's like, I'm sure that
you can still sell this. And I was just like,
oh my god, oh god, Like I know that she
(20:38):
vomited after she took a bite, and it's not like
there's vomit on the kibab, but nevertheless, it grows never no.
So this is when she finds the old diner and
goes inside, and she is having such a great time,
(20:59):
just like bonding with these people in here speaking the language,
and evil Mabel is just sitting there trying to be
involved and attempting to like ask, what did he say?
What does that mean? And she keeps being like, oh,
it's an anti pax, so it's thing I don't think
you would get it, or oh, well that takes a
(21:21):
lot of time to explain, and I'm just I don't
want to get into it. Oh God, you guys, this
is the kind of thing that I think about all
the time, because like, as a kid, I didn't speak Spanish.
My father's whole family did and they barely spoke any English,
and it was always really hard. We would, you know,
(21:43):
get together and they would want to speak the language
they fucking spoke. Of course they did, and I never
begrudged them that. I was never like mad at feeling
like I was being kept out of the loop. But
it was really hard that I didn't speak it. And
there was like I had a cousin who spoke English
(22:04):
as well as I did, and so it was basically
me hanging out with her all the time, and I
just wasn't able to really build relationships with anybody else.
And by the time they were much better at English,
I was older and had my own whole life, and
(22:25):
so it was sort of like we just missed the
chance to get closer as family, and then my dad
died and like everything with the funeral was a disaster
and I just wound up sort of like losing touch
with everybody. And I think about it all the time,
just like how it could have been different if I had, like, really,
(22:50):
what it is is that I should have had more
effort put into teaching me Spanish, little kid. But to
a point understandably, my father was like thinking that if
he if I was to get ahead, knowing Spanish wasn't
(23:12):
going to be advantageous to me. It was much better
if I just spoke English really well and presented as
white as possible, which isn't untrue unfortunately. So I think
that a big part of him thought he was doing
his best for me, that what he was, you know,
(23:33):
doing was the right thing. And I had just like
this scene where there's so many like jokes where they're
laughing and you're trying to understand, like, wait, what was
the joke? What's happening, and nobody really wants to take
a moment out to explain it to you. Half the time,
the joke is sort of a play on words that
(23:54):
doesn't really translate right and just this sense of being
like out of the loop and a third wheel who's
hanging around for no reason. I just the whole thing
was put in a new light in this scene. But
obviously this is low key how Evil Mabel feels all
the time, like she is out here trying to fit
(24:18):
in with the with all of the crew and trying
to like find a place for herself in the midst
of their already formed click, which she acknowledges like busting
into a vampire click can be really hard. So it
was just like putting it in that context, like seeing
(24:41):
it as what about when it's like a language thing.
I really felt like, oh, this is just what how
she lives all the time, and doesn't that suck? You know?
I want Evil Mabel to be accepted. I feel like
if they had, I've made her truly irritating, I would
(25:04):
in some ways enjoy her being rebuffed and the constant attempts.
And I think that's part of the point, is like
the Vamps are not supposed to be nice people. We're
not supposed to really like them. They're supposed to be thoughtless,
borderline cruel and just sort of terrible, selfish assholes and
(25:25):
so the point is that she is perfectly nice and
they are just kind of ostracizing her for no good reason.
And I just have a really hard time watching that.
It makes me sad. So that's that's the thing with her.
But in the end, like I said, Naja claims that
(25:46):
she's going to turn over a new leaf. We'll see
how true that is. I am not going to hold
my breath. I don't know about y'all. And then there's
so here's this other thing that I found really funny,
you guys, So the the boys' night out. I don't
remember the other two dudes' names, but we have Sean
and like his two friends who are very like Jersey
(26:10):
Shore feeling dudes. And this is when they're all out
at this like I can't remember if it's called a
brasserie how you say that, but basically it's sort of
a like a wine bar and nandor like a fucking
(26:31):
weirdo when they're like, hey, we never see you guys
drinking anything, taking a sip of anything, and you know,
there's an opportunity for just a sort of like moment
of uh oh ah, well yeah, you know, and just
making up something, which is what eventually Laslow does do,
but initially Nandor is just like, oh, well, I don't
(26:58):
drink wine, but I do drink something else that's red,
but it's not wine. And it's like, literally, what do
you intend to say after that? And finally Sean is like, okay,
then what is it? And Nanders seems truly taken aback,
(27:20):
like he was just never expecting them to have a
follow up question, and of course they did, and Laslow
has to chime in and be like, oh, he likes
red bulls and vodka. That's what he means when he
likes to drink something red. And they all like love that.
(27:40):
They're a big fan of that explanation. But he's just
sitting there like as if he got somehow talked into
a corner and unexpectedly was like, oh, I've got to
find my way out of this. You put yourself there.
What are you talking about? And again, rightfully, Laslow in
(28:01):
the moment is just like, yeah, dude, see this is
what I'm talking about. What the fuck, dude, why are
you saying this stuff all the time? You just blurted
it out and for what reason? And uh, what I
liked about this episode was that I kind of thought
we were going to get like a because like the
(28:26):
way it starts off and him saying this stupid thing,
you could answer this with mesmerism, And even though it
was his own fault, I wouldn't be mad at approaching
things that way because it's the easiest, most like direct method, right,
So a part of me was just kind of like, yeah, right,
(28:48):
if you want to mesmerize, why not go ahead. But
it's something that Laslow is charming enough to kind of
side step. So that's the path that they decide to
take for at this time is they just kind of
explain it away and it works in that moment where like, okay,
(29:12):
you know, it's just a red bull thing. But then
as the evening progresses, things get more and more absurd,
and Laslow keeps insisting that he's going to be able
to charm his way out of it, use you know,
his understanding of psychology to get out of it. And
(29:33):
as things continue, it gets more and more obvious that
there's only so much you can do that there's not
going to be a good enough explanation to get in.
But at first him choosing to do it his way
does make the most sense, and so the guys eventually
(29:54):
get in this huge fight because one of the I
was putting ice in his wineglass. Now I really want
to like speak in my own defense here, you guys
real quick, even though I know nobody was coming for me,
but I am aware and this is like partially my brand.
(30:15):
It's my own fault that I am seen as like
a huge snob about food. Valid I am like, that's
not an unwarranted at all, but I am a snob
when it comes to looking at things sort of from
(30:39):
afar if that makes sense. Like if I'm on a
Facebook page and I see that somebody posted such and such,
and I'm like, why would you put those two things together? Like,
I will be extremely judgmental by myself if I am
like standing in front of you, if we're at the
(31:01):
same dinner table and you're choosing to like put ketchup
on a steak, that very well may break my heart.
To excuse me, I don't know why I had that goes,
hold on, hold on, we take up of water. Sorry, guys,
I get hiccups sometimes and they take ages to go away,
(31:22):
and it's really annoying. But it may break my heart
to see you doing that. And I might hate it,
but I don't step in and go, whoa, whoa, whoa,
you are not putting ketchup on that. I may feel
that way, and I may say to someone later, I
can't fucking believe that he poured ketchup all over that
(31:44):
prime fucking rib Jesus Christ. But if that's how you
like to eat it, far be it from me to
step in and tell you you aren't allowed to eat
something a certain way. It's just that is not the
way that I approach things. So for me, the fact
(32:09):
that these guys get into this argument about this actually
kind of cracked me up, because it's the sort of
thing that I could really see people like thinking I
would have the same feelings on it, that I would
maybe even approach it the same way and just be like,
what the fuck are you doing? Although granted Sean does
(32:30):
say something like that's an eight dollar bottle of wine.
That was a very good line, to be honest, But
I just I can have my private thinking about how
you have bad taste. I am not going to step
in and try and make you just not consume something
(32:54):
the way that you enjoy it, because I know there's
no part of me doubts that you like it that way,
and you're doing this because you like that. I just
think the fact that you like it that way means
that you're a philistine, and that's your business. That's not
my business, you know what I'm saying. So anyway, these
(33:17):
guys wind up getting into like a literal fistfight over this,
and they break the front wind, they like knock over
a bunch of tables, break a bunch of dishes, and
then eventually wind up breaking through the front window of
this establishment, and the cops are called, rightfully so. And
(33:42):
the cops when they show up are this one dude
named Terry I believe, who used to go to high
school with these guys, so he recognizes them right away
and it's just like, oh God, you fucking dos and
in a wonderful woman. These guys are being such assholes
(34:03):
to this dude, which is fine because he's a cop
and a fuck cops. But what Laslow decides to do
is just charm him and try and pretend that everybody
has talked about this dude so extensively and so many
times that he already knows him by reputation, and that
(34:26):
there's probably a way out of this because of the
fact that he is so so much more of a
go getter and a smart man than his peers are,
so they might not be able to think of a
way out of this, but that's because they're not Terry.
And then as he's saying all of this, it turns
(34:48):
out on the ground Sean has crawled up between Terry's legs,
gotten his handcuffs out and a fixed said handcuffs to
Terry's ankles so that he can't move. And then his
other friend has gone and stolen the car, the cop car.
(35:14):
It's such a great bit because Laslow could talk them
out of these situations, but these guys are truly such
fucking imbeciles that he keeps being put in a position
where he has to clean up after them. And it
doesn't have to be this way, so over and over
(35:37):
again throughout the night, Like at first you're just kind
of like, he's right, we don't need mesmerism. He's managing this.
And you see Nander being like impressed a couple times,
just being like, wow, he really managed to pull that off.
Eventually they all run, they get into the cop car,
they crash the car, they flip it and At that point,
(36:03):
Nandor turns into a bat and flies as the boys
run off, and he starts to leave, and then he
realizes that Laslow's not coming with him, and I'm also going, Laslow, bail,
what are you doing? Get out of there, dude, Like
run the fuck away. But when Nandor comes back, Laslow
(36:25):
says to him something like, well, you thought that I
wanted to be a coward like you, And I was
sort of like, damn, what is the problem. But it's
just apparently because he's salty, because he's supposed to not
be as good at mesmerism, so he's just gonna stand
here and like try and make a point by talking
(36:48):
to the cops. But for what reason? Why, Like, just
just get out of there. And of course at that
point he has reached his limit. It doesn't work, he
can't talk his way out of it, so they wind
up in jail. And that's finally when he admits to
(37:10):
Nandor he is jealous that probably this is a point
at which you could use mesmerism and it's like, you know, warranted.
So Nandor uses it, and we see them all like
walk out, walk out of the police station, being saluted
(37:31):
by everybody as they go by, and I loved it
when they When Nandor is like, what exactly did you
tell them? Leslow asks, and Nandor says, oh, I told
them that we solved all of the crimes that these
guys committed. And also I said that I am Captain
(37:54):
Sully Sullenberger or Sullenberg, and you are that guy that
you like from that TV show who is apparently Tom
Selleck on Blue Bloods, which is not a show that
I have seen. And so everybody is saluting them as
they leave because of this, which is hilarious. But you, guys,
(38:18):
Captain Sully's sullen Is it sullen Burger? I have to
look this up. This is gonna bother me. Sully sullen Burger.
It is Burger, guys. This dude is from my town
where I currently live, in Dennison. And my friend did
(38:41):
this incredible mural. It's like thirty feet high and it
took a whole summer. It was so much work. They
did this incredible job. It's absolutely beautiful of Sully and
the plane and it's like it's like a portrait combined
(39:01):
with like a almost a collage of like relevant imagery
and everything, and there was supposed to be this whole
ceremony to unveil it, and Sully was gonna be there.
They have told my friend every year for like three
years that Sully's coming this year and we're gonna do
the unveiling, and it has never happened, and it's such
(39:24):
a bummer. My friend at this point has like resigned
resigned themselves to the fact that it's not happening. We're
not this is never going to be a thing. He
just doesn't care likely enough Sully. I mean, but uh,
oh my god, y'all. I kept being so excited about
it and being like, oh my god, I'm gonna come,
I'm gonna meet Sully and see this awesome mural. And
(39:47):
every year, every year it's just like, oh, psych, yeah,
that's not sorry about it, But no, that's not happening, y'all.
I every time I hear Sully's name, that is meately
what I think of. So anyway, that's how they wind
up getting out of it. And now we are going
(40:09):
to go over to what's happening with Guillermo. So Guillermo
goes back to Derek to ask him, So, my guy,
how long did it take for you to wind up
a vampire? Because I you know, you bit me like
how long ago now and nothing, it hasn't happened, So
(40:32):
what's the deal. And it turns out for Derek he
said something like six to eight hours, which, uh, the
girl that Naja turned, it took several days. It wasn't.
It wasn't no six to eight hours type thing. She
it took like a full day for her to really
(40:54):
start feeling like she was getting sick, and then eventually
there was like her seeing to be dead and her
roommate calling the ambulance and everything, and so you know,
we had a couple days of this before eventually she
finally like was overwhelmed with bloodlust and like took somebody
(41:15):
down finally. But six to eight hours, that's really really fast,
And like, if you're kind of thinking about it in
terms of maybe, however fast it worked for the person
who turned you, it may work as quickly for you,
And there's no real reason to think that would be true.
(41:36):
But like, you know, I am somebody who tries to
find patterns and correlations in things, and I might look
at that and try and use that as like, Okay,
well perhaps that means I can expect XYZ. So the
fact that it has been over two weeks and still nothing,
when this dude had to happen in less than half
(41:57):
a day, that is baffling. So Derek, like, what they
decide to do is they go to the baron to
ask him have you ever heard of this? And the
baron's also talking to I can't remember his name, but
the gargoyle dude whose I can't recall what his name is,
(42:18):
forgive me, but yeah, they are asking them like, is
this something y'all have ever run into before? Like what
the fuck? And neither of them has ever heard of
such a thing before, which is worrisome. And this is
what's making me think that it has something to do
with Guiermo's bloodline. I you know, again, I don't have
(42:42):
any evidence. I'm just sort of thinking, like, what's something
that would make the most sense, And that's really the
only thing I can think of. But eventually the baron
is like, oh, there's this guy outside who I he
turned in because the guy kept waking up in the
morning and turning on his leaf blower. And then and
(43:05):
you guys, that is the most relatable shit I have
ever heard of this dude is out here in the
morning when this guy is trying to go to sleep.
Have you ever lived next door to like tell me,
tell me guys that I am not the only one
where I live now, not nearly so much of a thing.
(43:27):
But when I lived in Philadelphia, which is really what's
sort of funny about it, because Philadelphia, he would not
think that I would be next to people who even
owned lawn care stuff, since we all had like a
sort of postage stamp sized yard. But because people did
have such a small yard, they were very meticulous with
(43:48):
it a lot, and so people would have like weed
whackers and stuff, and they would be starting these bitches
up at like seven point thirty in the morning on
a Saturday. And you know, I get it. You want
to get stuff done when it's still cool outside. It's
light out but it's not hot, get it done for
the day, go in and shower and get on with
(44:09):
your day. And I fucking sympathize. But also that shit
is loud as hell and it's a weekend and we
want to sleep in, and what the fuck is wrong
with you? Like that's really always what it comes down to.
For me. It's like what the fuck is the matter
with you? Do you not consider anybody else in your vicinity?
And it gets into your fucking bones and vibrates it's
(44:31):
so loud. So anyway, I completely was on his side
with this, and the dude is like really nice too,
which makes it all so sad. I love when he's
like my liege and the baron just goes ooop on
his nose and the dude seems to be like delighted
by it. I thought maybe this was gonna seem really
(44:52):
sort of condescending, but no, this guy is sort of like,
oh he booped me, like it was so cute. So
the theory that the baron is trying to work with
here is what if we try again with like the
turning thing, but with a different vampire, and maybe if
(45:15):
you do it again, He says something like, you know,
it might make you a double vampire, or it might
make you like half a vampire. I don't know what
it'll do, but it's worth a shot. So oddly, so,
Derek drinks some of his blood, and then he drinks
(45:39):
some of Derek's blood and it seems like nothing has happened.
The baron is like, how do you feel and he's like, oh,
you know, I feel fine. I'm just sort of irritated
because the belt on this machine. And then all of
a sudden, he just explodes like a water balloon. It
is so abrupt and so horrible. You guys, it was
(46:03):
so awful the way that all of them are splattered too.
It's gruesome. And nothing happens to Derek. It's like, apparently
sort of a fifty to fifty thing. What could go
wrong here? And I understand later when Leslow's suggests to Hiermo, well,
(46:30):
what if I talked to Nandor and convinced him to
bite you a second time? Maybe that would work? Understandably,
Garimona was like, I don't think that he might be fine.
Derek's fine, it seems, you know, but who wants to
(46:51):
take that risk. I don't like those odds either. I
am not blaming him at all for kind of shying
away from this. So I really can't imagine why that
even happened to that poor guy. I feel bad for him.
I really do, like, you know, ouch, that sucks. He
(47:11):
was just having a good old time being a vampire
working on his lawn. Shit, why can't he just have
lived in peace. Oh the poor thing. So what it
turns out happens later is Guierremo anybody who has watched
(47:32):
like A Three's Company who that's sort of my go to,
as it is for so many people for like the
plot of a show that's full of high jinks and
silly assumptions and people like overhearing the wrong parts of
phone calls or conversations and leaping to the wrong conclusions.
(47:53):
He should know better. But Guillermo gets approached by Laslow,
who's like, hey, dude, I don't know what the fuck
you think you're hiding, but it's become very obvious that
there is some shit going on, and the longer you
(48:13):
keep it quiet, the worse it's going to get. So
you had better unburden yourself. And Ghiamo's like, wait what,
and he says something else that sort of implies that
he knows what's going on, which, of course we know
that's not what's happening here. But Giermo is just so
(48:34):
riddled with guilt at this point that he is jumping
to all the wrong conclusions. So finally he just blurts out, well,
I just felt so guilty. I didn't want him to
know he just kept saying that he was gonna bite me,
and he never did, so that's why I went to
somebody else. And of course at this point, Lazlo holds
(48:56):
his hands up and it's just like whoa, whoa, whoa,
what the fuck? You got bit by somebody else? And
Gamma realizes that he has made a terrible mistake and
just told his secret and is horrified, rightfully so, and
just like wait what, Oh my god, I thought that
you knew what was wait wait wait, but it's too late.
(49:20):
And if anybody was going to find out, Laslow is
the one Laslow. He is the one that's most willing
to break rules in a general sense than anybody. Naja.
She sticks to rules because it makes her feel more comfortable,
and she has a very strong sense of like you
(49:43):
are going to get what you have, like reap what
you've sown, basically right. And I am also in a
lot of ways that sort of person. But I also
am willing to like cut slack for friends depending on
what it is that they have fucked up on. She
(50:03):
does not consider Gama a friend, so that wouldn't even
be a factor. And then, of course you know Nandor
is the one, so he's not. And Colin Robinson would
just thrive off the conflict of telling everybody what it
is that Guillamo had done. So that's gonna be a
(50:23):
whole different kind of nightmare that he would enjoy so much.
So yeah, nobody but Laslow, I don't think is going
to be cool about this, you know what I'm saying.
I'm just trying to like imagine anyone else finding out
like how that would go. And I don't know how
(50:45):
long Laslow keeps this secret. Either he is he tends
to be able to keep secrets, I feel like, or
he has sort of sense of obligation about it, you know,
which he did with Colin Robinson as well. So I
(51:08):
don't I've been trying to think, like, eventually this information
has to come out, and how does that happen? And
my instinct is that Giermo fucks up, not that Laslow
tells on him, but I think that Laslow could be
driven to tell on him by Guermo doing something that
(51:32):
Laslow perceives as really really shitty. I don't know what
that would even look like, but I could just see
Laslow blurting it out in a moment of horror at like,
I can't believe that you would throw me under the
bus when I had been keeping such and such a
secret forever. The it would have to be something that
(51:52):
he did sort of suddenly without really thinking it through,
because he when Gemo says, please don't tell nan Or,
Laslow's reaction is tell Nandor. I don't think he'd even
survive that, Like he considers not telling Nandor to be
(52:13):
a service to Nandor, not to Giermo. And that's why
I really don't feel all that worried about him, like
you know, spilling the beans. But he can let his
temper get the better of him sometimes, So that's sort
of what's on my mind there. It's just like, yeah,
(52:34):
I know that you don't think you would tell, and
I don't think you would if you had a moment
to stop and ask yourself, is this a good idea?
But Laslow can be a bit impulsive sometimes and you know,
I don't know' that's my uh my guess is that
(52:55):
it's if I were going to say who's more likely
to fuck it up? Or Giarmo, I'm gonna say Guirmo.
But I don't think it's completely out of the question
that Laslo fucks it up. So yeah, that's that. I'm
trying to see if there was anything else that I forgot.
(53:17):
Oh my god, I forgot about one of the guys
shooting the gun off as well, because Sean tells him
to like empty out the bullets and so he just
begins to fire it off randomly at the air yauy.
These tudes are so like. And I also I forgot
to mention how evil Mabel is attempting to get like
(53:42):
she's trying to ask whether or not Naja has ever
harmed anyone? And oh interesting, So okay, she snacha if
Naja has ever harmed anyone, and Naja keeps saying no,
(54:04):
and Evil Mabel is just like are you sure? Are you?
Are you really really sure? It hadn't occurred to me.
I just thought Evil Mabel was just like fucking with
Naja to try and make Naja be nicer. But did
Evil Mabel actually put a hex on Naja? Like is
(54:27):
this hex real? It never entered my mind that she
had put a genuine hex on her. I thought she
was tricking her into thinking there was a hex so
as to like attempt to forge a relationship between the
two of them and bond them through attempting to take
this fake hex off. But maybe Evil Mabel felt pissed
(54:52):
at the way Naja treated her and actually hext her.
I never thought of that, but maybe that's what's happening,
because like that whole scene is preceded by one where
Naja is lamenting how she doesn't have any close female friends,
and Evil Mabel is looking at the camera like, what
(55:13):
the fuck she said? I thought over the past year
that we had gotten pretty close. Same last season they
were together a lot. I had thought also that they
were becoming very friendly. And when she keeps being like,
you don't have any female friends seriously, and Nanja keeps
saying nope, not one. She never actually says what about me,
(55:34):
it's implied, and Naja never picks up on that, because
of course she doesn't, because she's just not She's just
not the type to notice anybody else. That's just really
what that comes down to in the end, is just
a complete lack of awareness. She is so self absorbed.
(55:58):
But yeah, so maybe that's what's going on that I
never even thought of that. I feel really silly now,
but maybe that's Uh, Guys, tell me if that's what
you think was going on, because that had not occurred
to me. So I'm trying to see if there's anything
else I miss but I'm pretty sure that I covered everything. Yeah,
(56:20):
so I'm a little under time here, but I feel
okay with that because I've touched all of my bassis.
I'm pretty sure. I'm so excited, though, you guys, I
don't know what to expect about. You know, Giemo's transformation.
It the one thing that he manages to do this
(56:41):
episode when Derek is like, have you tried to become
a bat? And he becomes a bat and flies around
for a second. When Gearmo tries to do it, it's
just two giant bat wings come out of the sides
of his head like ears, like he looks like Gizmo
for a second, which I guess he has been called Gizmo,
(57:02):
which didn't think of that, But I don't think there's
a connection. But so he's able to like almost do
something but not really so, but that's new. Right, last
time he tried to become a bat, nothing happened, So
he's inching along. I just don't know if it's ever
(57:24):
getting where he thinks it's going. Or if he's stalling
out and that's the problem. So so curious. I'm very
excited to see where this is going. All right, kiddos, well,
I will be seeing you very shortly with a new episode.
I hope you're enjoying the coverage. And until then, to
Luma the fuckers. That was an unspoiled network past
This is an unspoiled network podcast. This is spoil Me
covering what we do in The Shadows, Season five, episode two,
A night out with the guys. In this episode, well,
I was wondering how long it was going to take
(00:24):
for Gama's secret to get brought into the light, and
it turns out it's only partially out, but it's enough
out that I'm already worried. Welcome to spoil Me. Welcome
(01:01):
to the show everyone. I am Natasha. Thank you very
much to Max for commissioning this episode. Guys this season
is I am really excited. I really am. I think
that I hadn't realized how it had kind of gotten old,
(01:24):
what was going on with Guillermo always being put off
and being like the sad boy, and had just accepted, like, well,
this is the shick that we're going with, and you know,
he still is the sad boy. That's kind of the
brilliant thing is like despite it all, he's still things
haven't really like turned a corner for him. But this
(01:46):
whole like secret and the way that nobody really understands
what's happening and why I am so here for it,
and I feel like this is the strongest plotline that
has ever sort of carried the season from the beginning.
I'm hoping so much that it lasts and that we
(02:08):
don't just you know, sort of turn a corner and
it falls apart after like episode four, But we'll see.
So this episode, I have some questions, and I'm really
curious about whether or not anybody else has the same questions,
because y'all, this show has been pretty uh consistent most
(02:36):
of the time about like character stuff and the lore,
and they don't really tend to fuck that up too
too badly. But there was an episode in was it
the first season or the second whatever episode it was
(02:57):
that when they all get caught by animal Control. In
that episode, it is explicitly said by Nandor that he
is not good at doing hypnosis, and he attempts to
do it and it doesn't really work. And that's like
(03:17):
a couple of times he tries it and just kind
of fails at him, and eventually it's Laslow. I believe
that has to step in and do it. If it's
not Laslow, then it's not it's one of the two.
Because I know for a fact that Nandor was the
(03:40):
one saying confessing that he wasn't that good at it,
and I believe that the context of it was sort
of Guillermo being like admiring about it and him being
a bit embarrassed at the fact that he just isn't
super proficient. Yo, what happened? Why are we now turning
(04:04):
it around to be the opposite? Did they just forget?
Is that? Just like I kept waiting for this to
be a bit. I was gonna say a bit of
a but no, Honestly, I kept waiting for this to
be a bit, for it to turn out like, oh, yeah,
(04:25):
I used to be really good at it and I'm
not anymore or whatever, And it turns out that like
the writers, I think, just straight up forgot that whole
thing ever happened? And for that reason, normally this kind
(04:47):
of thing, I'm just like, oh, they clearly forgot. Lol,
it happens. Doesn't bother me. But unfortunately, like a whole
plotline in this episode relies the fact explicitly specifically that
Nandor is much better at it than Laslow, and that
(05:09):
Laslow's jealous and has been jealous for a while. And
so thus I'm sorry, as much as I would like
to just sort of handwave that this, you know, is
a mistake that we fucked up and it's not a
big deal. I can't do that when you make it
(05:30):
the whole episode, And it's a shame because the episode
is actually quite fun, like that plotline is really enjoyable
and hilarious, but because it's predicated on something that has
been contradicted by an earlier script, it just feels, really,
(05:54):
it feels really sloppy. That's the word I want, is
just that it feels really sloppy. And I am not
like you know, I cover the show an episode at
a time, and because I cover it this way, there
is a possibility that I am picking up on things
that other people might not, and so I might be
(06:16):
a bit more picky about certain things than average. But
I don't. I don't feel like the way that I
talk about some of these episodes would make it so
that I remember ridiculous, tiny nothing details that nobody's going
to remember. I feel like if I were to search, hey,
(06:41):
wasn't nandor supposed to be bad at doing like hypnotism,
I feel like I'm going to stumble across a bunch
of like Reddit posts where people have noticed this as well.
It was not a nothing detail. It was sort of
like a key point in that episode because the fact
that he was not good at it was what made
(07:02):
it so that they couldn't get out of animal control,
and so like it was a key plot point for
that episode as well in a way. So you know,
just I have to come out of the gate and
say that as much as that like plot was super fun,
(07:22):
and I'm going to talk about it and just sort
of set aside that it doesn't really make sense with
the context of everything I It bothered me when I
realized that apparently nobody else remembered the thing that I
thought was like going to turn out to be part
of the joke. So it just just I'm sorry for it.
(07:48):
I don't like being this way. What can you do?
So this the start of this episode is kind of
mocking Nandor because he keeps on falling back on mesmerizing people,
when in fact, a lot of the situations that he
(08:12):
winds up in are his own fault if he had
just kept his mouth shut, if he had just guarded
his tongue at all. And to be fair, throughout the episode,
we see that as much as Laslo may be saying
all of this because he's jealous. He isn't wrong, and
even Nandor can see it. There's just a whole like
(08:36):
series of moments where he just blurts shit out and
eventually they do wind up in a place where it's like, Okay,
I kind of think that we have to mesmerize somebody
to get out of this situation. But it's a you know,
a really really particularly bad moment, and it's not the norm,
(09:01):
which apparently has it has become for Nandor. It's the
norm for him to just like go out here and
just completely hypnotize everybody all the time. So I also like,
that's the opening we get as that's the cold open,
and then we get the credits, and I had forgotten
(09:21):
to mention that Evil Mabel is in the opening credits. Now.
I meant to say something about it last episode, because
I you know, I don't think she was in opening
credits this season before. I may be wrong about that,
but I forgot to mention it because she's not actually
(09:42):
in the episode, and that turns out to be part
of the thing when she shows up here, because it
is really funny, you guys, she's just trying to like
become part of the gang and they are excluding her,
but it's not totally clear what the deal is and
(10:03):
why they feel like they don't want her around. There
are times where there's like characters who are extremely obnoxious
and everybody's just sort of like, yeah, we all agree, no,
thank you, we don't want to involve this person in
our lives, and we're all completely in agreement on that.
This isn't one like she's perfectly friendly and not obnoxious.
(10:29):
It doesn't feel like she's super pushy. It feels like
they are all just lazy and oblivious more than anything.
And I was just not really sure if like it.
Maybe it's also the fact that she's sort of part
of the establishment. Is that it like that they just
(10:51):
don't kind of want her around because she is part
of the uh, the bosses, and it's like she's I
won't say that she's spying exactly, but maybe it could
feel like that, like she's a bit of a narc
I don't know. Regardless, though, the episode is mostly to
do with her, well not mostly, but her plotline is
(11:13):
mostly to do with the fact that she was apparently
hoping that they would invite her to stay in the house,
and they haven't done that, as she puts it, because
there's some zoning regulation where only four vampires can live
in the house at once and they can't have a fifth.
(11:34):
And she's just like, yeah, it's, you know, a zoning
thing that they were talking about but I've never really
heard of, and of course, like it's not real. And
the thing that's kind of what made me go hold
on a second, because it's one thing if you are
telling her this because you find her so annoying, and
you are just inventing more and more elaborate ways to
(11:57):
keep her out of your household, but she just doesn't
seem that bad, so coming up with more and more
elaborate ways. I was like, but why, guys, isn't it
just easier to like have her around. She's kind of
enjoyable and she's also like a horny weirdo, just like
all of you. I feel like it works. I don't know,
(12:21):
but we don't get there right away. I just had
to talk about that out of the gate. I do
enjoy this plot line. The thing that we start off
with is Nadyat just bemoaning her life, and she keeps
talking as if everything that has happened to her is
pure circumstance, and that she is just the victim of it,
(12:44):
and that there was nothing that could have been done
to prevent any of it. And if there had been
something that could have been done, everybody else should have
been the one to do it, but none of them did,
so they let her down. It's just a lot of
poor me. All everything's going wrong and nothing is ever
going to change. Yet another moment when Nandor starts to
(13:06):
suggest mesmerism to solve her problems, and it's pretty like
I always am a fan in this show of the
moments when Naja gets to be particularly ridiculous, because she
can be the one that's like got her head on
straight most of the time, so when they sort of
(13:28):
let her go into her her more goofy moments, I
am very very into it. You know. It's just fun
to watch her, especially annoy everybody else, because even when
she is being silly, she doesn't tend to get to
be annoying, which I don't know if that's so much
(13:54):
a thing about her character or if it's really speaking
more to the fact that like these days, writing women
like as just the annoying one, especially when it's one
woman in a house with three other dude characters. Maybe
making her the annoying one isn't exactly like a great look.
(14:18):
I don't know how much that's like, particularly a consideration
of theirs, but it did occur to me. So, yeah,
she's just like whining, and she's talking about all these
different things that happened and how her you know, her
sister's legs got crushed. Meanwhile, her dolla is like, yeah,
but but you did that, you remember doing it right,
(14:42):
Like everybody is just going, yeah, well we tried to
stop you. Yeah, and we told you that was a
bad idea, And she's just talking over them as if
they aren't even there. So this leads later to a
whole thing where she is, and it seems to me
(15:03):
like Mabel planted this thing, right. I don't know exactly
how she made it so that this thing kept returning
even though it was being torn up or thrown in
the trash. I feel like there has to be something
genuinely magical about it, but I don't know how that works,
because they have access, Like there was that whole library
(15:24):
full of basically magical items, so maybe there was something
in there. But the fact is that, like Naja recognized
the woman in the photo, and what are the odds
of that. I just don't know how, you know what
I'm saying, I don't know how much that is something
that can be explained. So if there is a theory
out there that or maybe we get told exactly how
(15:46):
this went down at some point and I'm just I
haven't gotten there yet. I don't know, but uh, I
really am curious about like how it felt like the
way that evil looks at the camera when they translate
what it says on the picture frame. It felt like
(16:07):
she was kind of doing a whole hey see what
I did there, like a little wink and a nudge,
which led me to believe that she had set this
all up. And I don't know how she did it,
Like maybe this was something that she left and got
the stuff ahead of time before proposing it all. I
(16:28):
don't know. I don't know, but anyway, it doesn't really
matter that much. So in the end, the suggestion that
she makes is that, oh, there is a probably a
hex on you. And when nug is like, do you
mean a curse, She's like, no, no, no, A curse
(16:51):
is just something that losers make up when their lives
are going wrong so that they don't feel like so
much of a loser. But the hexes are very very real,
and so she pretends that she's like sensing some energy
in the room. And again I'm pretending. I'm saying pretend
(17:12):
because I am pretty sure that she set all of
this up. But I'm just unclear on exactly how the
it keeps appearing. Just did she just make like ten
of them and keep putting it in place because she
knew that was going to happen, that the instinct was
going to be to destroy it. Maybe that's all it is.
I don't know, But she like shows Naja this photo
(17:38):
and naj just says, this is Yahya Nyika in Anti Paxos.
She was a very bad luck woman, a real shitstir
How did this get here? And she tries to tear
it up and throw it away, and it's back again,
and she throws the whole thing into the fire, and
(18:00):
it's back again, over and over and over again, until
eventually it suggested that maybe she should translate what it
says on the outside of the frame, But because she
can't remember, it has been so long since she has
spoken this language that she doesn't recall how to speak
(18:20):
it until they wind up going to Little Anti Paxos,
where she suddenly it like comes flooding back to her.
And the reason that she finds out about that is
because she goes over to talk to Colin Robinson and
see if he can do a translation using his computer,
(18:42):
and he's like, well, why don't you just go to
Little Antipaxos? And at first she just thinks he's fucking
with her, and she like smacks him on the back
of the head and it's just like, yeah, why don't
I just do that? Shut the fuck up, idiot, And
he's like, no, I'm really asking why wouldn't you go
do that? And she finds out that like fifteen minutes
(19:05):
away is Little Anti Paxos and she had no idea
the whole time that she has been living here for
however many years, and she's so mad at him and
he's just like, well, you never asked. So they go
over there. It's really actually kind of adorable. She's like
wandering around, looking really fondly at everything and just kind
(19:29):
of I can't believe it all looks just like it
like I feel like I'm home again. There's all this
cheap shit and old fish. It's like looking out like
my childhood bedroom window. And she takes like a little
bite of some kind of grilled meat and vomits copiously.
(19:53):
Oh my god, horrible, you guys. I every time that
they do this bit, it's a combination of like the
sound effect of the splattering and the very real kind
of sound that the actor makes, and it I don't
like it. I just don't like it at all. And
(20:14):
she like this reaction comes the instant after she takes
a teeny tiny nibble and then she just puts the
like little what do you call it kibob? I guess
she puts it back and it's like, I'm sure that
you can still sell this. And I was just like,
oh my god, oh god, Like I know that she
(20:38):
vomited after she took a bite, and it's not like
there's vomit on the kibab, but nevertheless, it grows never no.
So this is when she finds the old diner and
goes inside, and she is having such a great time,
(20:59):
just like bonding with these people in here speaking the language,
and evil Mabel is just sitting there trying to be
involved and attempting to like ask, what did he say?
What does that mean? And she keeps being like, oh,
it's an anti pax, so it's thing I don't think
you would get it, or oh, well that takes a
(21:21):
lot of time to explain, and I'm just I don't
want to get into it. Oh God, you guys, this
is the kind of thing that I think about all
the time, because like, as a kid, I didn't speak Spanish.
My father's whole family did and they barely spoke any English,
and it was always really hard. We would, you know,
(21:43):
get together and they would want to speak the language
they fucking spoke. Of course they did, and I never
begrudged them that. I was never like mad at feeling
like I was being kept out of the loop. But
it was really hard that I didn't speak it. And
there was like I had a cousin who spoke English
(22:04):
as well as I did, and so it was basically
me hanging out with her all the time, and I
just wasn't able to really build relationships with anybody else.
And by the time they were much better at English,
I was older and had my own whole life, and
(22:25):
so it was sort of like we just missed the
chance to get closer as family, and then my dad
died and like everything with the funeral was a disaster
and I just wound up sort of like losing touch
with everybody. And I think about it all the time,
just like how it could have been different if I had, like, really,
(22:50):
what it is is that I should have had more
effort put into teaching me Spanish, little kid. But to
a point understandably, my father was like thinking that if
he if I was to get ahead, knowing Spanish wasn't
(23:12):
going to be advantageous to me. It was much better
if I just spoke English really well and presented as
white as possible, which isn't untrue unfortunately. So I think
that a big part of him thought he was doing
his best for me, that what he was, you know,
(23:33):
doing was the right thing. And I had just like
this scene where there's so many like jokes where they're
laughing and you're trying to understand, like, wait, what was
the joke? What's happening, and nobody really wants to take
a moment out to explain it to you. Half the time,
the joke is sort of a play on words that
(23:54):
doesn't really translate right and just this sense of being
like out of the loop and a third wheel who's
hanging around for no reason. I just the whole thing
was put in a new light in this scene. But
obviously this is low key how Evil Mabel feels all
the time, like she is out here trying to fit
(24:18):
in with the with all of the crew and trying
to like find a place for herself in the midst
of their already formed click, which she acknowledges like busting
into a vampire click can be really hard. So it
was just like putting it in that context, like seeing
(24:41):
it as what about when it's like a language thing.
I really felt like, oh, this is just what how
she lives all the time, and doesn't that suck? You know?
I want Evil Mabel to be accepted. I feel like
if they had, I've made her truly irritating, I would
(25:04):
in some ways enjoy her being rebuffed and the constant attempts.
And I think that's part of the point, is like
the Vamps are not supposed to be nice people. We're
not supposed to really like them. They're supposed to be thoughtless,
borderline cruel and just sort of terrible, selfish assholes and
(25:25):
so the point is that she is perfectly nice and
they are just kind of ostracizing her for no good reason.
And I just have a really hard time watching that.
It makes me sad. So that's that's the thing with her.
But in the end, like I said, Naja claims that
(25:46):
she's going to turn over a new leaf. We'll see
how true that is. I am not going to hold
my breath. I don't know about y'all. And then there's
so here's this other thing that I found really funny,
you guys, So the the boys' night out. I don't
remember the other two dudes' names, but we have Sean
and like his two friends who are very like Jersey
(26:10):
Shore feeling dudes. And this is when they're all out
at this like I can't remember if it's called a
brasserie how you say that, but basically it's sort of
a like a wine bar and nandor like a fucking
(26:31):
weirdo when they're like, hey, we never see you guys
drinking anything, taking a sip of anything, and you know,
there's an opportunity for just a sort of like moment
of uh oh ah, well yeah, you know, and just
making up something, which is what eventually Laslow does do,
but initially Nandor is just like, oh, well, I don't
(26:58):
drink wine, but I do drink something else that's red,
but it's not wine. And it's like, literally, what do
you intend to say after that? And finally Sean is like, okay,
then what is it? And Nanders seems truly taken aback,
(27:20):
like he was just never expecting them to have a
follow up question, and of course they did, and Laslow
has to chime in and be like, oh, he likes
red bulls and vodka. That's what he means when he
likes to drink something red. And they all like love that.
(27:40):
They're a big fan of that explanation. But he's just
sitting there like as if he got somehow talked into
a corner and unexpectedly was like, oh, I've got to
find my way out of this. You put yourself there.
What are you talking about? And again, rightfully, Laslow in
(28:01):
the moment is just like, yeah, dude, see this is
what I'm talking about. What the fuck, dude, why are
you saying this stuff all the time? You just blurted
it out and for what reason? And uh, what I
liked about this episode was that I kind of thought
we were going to get like a because like the
(28:26):
way it starts off and him saying this stupid thing,
you could answer this with mesmerism, And even though it
was his own fault, I wouldn't be mad at approaching
things that way because it's the easiest, most like direct method, right,
So a part of me was just kind of like, yeah, right,
(28:48):
if you want to mesmerize, why not go ahead. But
it's something that Laslow is charming enough to kind of
side step. So that's the path that they decide to
take for at this time is they just kind of
explain it away and it works in that moment where like, okay,
(29:12):
you know, it's just a red bull thing. But then
as the evening progresses, things get more and more absurd,
and Laslow keeps insisting that he's going to be able
to charm his way out of it, use you know,
his understanding of psychology to get out of it. And
(29:33):
as things continue, it gets more and more obvious that
there's only so much you can do that there's not
going to be a good enough explanation to get in.
But at first him choosing to do it his way
does make the most sense, and so the guys eventually
(29:54):
get in this huge fight because one of the I
was putting ice in his wineglass. Now I really want
to like speak in my own defense here, you guys
real quick, even though I know nobody was coming for me,
but I am aware and this is like partially my brand.
(30:15):
It's my own fault that I am seen as like
a huge snob about food. Valid I am like, that's
not an unwarranted at all, but I am a snob
when it comes to looking at things sort of from
(30:39):
afar if that makes sense. Like if I'm on a
Facebook page and I see that somebody posted such and such,
and I'm like, why would you put those two things together? Like,
I will be extremely judgmental by myself if I am
like standing in front of you, if we're at the
(31:01):
same dinner table and you're choosing to like put ketchup
on a steak, that very well may break my heart.
To excuse me, I don't know why I had that goes,
hold on, hold on, we take up of water. Sorry, guys,
I get hiccups sometimes and they take ages to go away,
(31:22):
and it's really annoying. But it may break my heart
to see you doing that. And I might hate it,
but I don't step in and go, whoa, whoa, whoa,
you are not putting ketchup on that. I may feel
that way, and I may say to someone later, I
can't fucking believe that he poured ketchup all over that
(31:44):
prime fucking rib Jesus Christ. But if that's how you
like to eat it, far be it from me to
step in and tell you you aren't allowed to eat
something a certain way. It's just that is not the
way that I approach things. So for me, the fact
(32:09):
that these guys get into this argument about this actually
kind of cracked me up, because it's the sort of
thing that I could really see people like thinking I
would have the same feelings on it, that I would
maybe even approach it the same way and just be like,
what the fuck are you doing? Although granted Sean does
(32:30):
say something like that's an eight dollar bottle of wine.
That was a very good line, to be honest, But
I just I can have my private thinking about how
you have bad taste. I am not going to step
in and try and make you just not consume something
(32:54):
the way that you enjoy it, because I know there's
no part of me doubts that you like it that way,
and you're doing this because you like that. I just
think the fact that you like it that way means
that you're a philistine, and that's your business. That's not
my business, you know what I'm saying. So anyway, these
(33:17):
guys wind up getting into like a literal fistfight over this,
and they break the front wind, they like knock over
a bunch of tables, break a bunch of dishes, and
then eventually wind up breaking through the front window of
this establishment, and the cops are called, rightfully so. And
(33:42):
the cops when they show up are this one dude
named Terry I believe, who used to go to high
school with these guys, so he recognizes them right away
and it's just like, oh God, you fucking dos and
in a wonderful woman. These guys are being such assholes
(34:03):
to this dude, which is fine because he's a cop
and a fuck cops. But what Laslow decides to do
is just charm him and try and pretend that everybody
has talked about this dude so extensively and so many
times that he already knows him by reputation, and that
(34:26):
there's probably a way out of this because of the
fact that he is so so much more of a
go getter and a smart man than his peers are,
so they might not be able to think of a
way out of this, but that's because they're not Terry.
And then as he's saying all of this, it turns
(34:48):
out on the ground Sean has crawled up between Terry's legs,
gotten his handcuffs out and a fixed said handcuffs to
Terry's ankles so that he can't move. And then his
other friend has gone and stolen the car, the cop car.
(35:14):
It's such a great bit because Laslow could talk them
out of these situations, but these guys are truly such
fucking imbeciles that he keeps being put in a position
where he has to clean up after them. And it
doesn't have to be this way, so over and over
(35:37):
again throughout the night, Like at first you're just kind
of like, he's right, we don't need mesmerism. He's managing this.
And you see Nander being like impressed a couple times,
just being like, wow, he really managed to pull that off.
Eventually they all run, they get into the cop car,
they crash the car, they flip it and At that point,
(36:03):
Nandor turns into a bat and flies as the boys
run off, and he starts to leave, and then he
realizes that Laslow's not coming with him, and I'm also going, Laslow, bail,
what are you doing? Get out of there, dude, Like
run the fuck away. But when Nandor comes back, Laslow
(36:25):
says to him something like, well, you thought that I
wanted to be a coward like you, And I was
sort of like, damn, what is the problem. But it's
just apparently because he's salty, because he's supposed to not
be as good at mesmerism, so he's just gonna stand
here and like try and make a point by talking
(36:48):
to the cops. But for what reason? Why, Like, just
just get out of there. And of course at that
point he has reached his limit. It doesn't work, he
can't talk his way out of it, so they wind
up in jail. And that's finally when he admits to
(37:10):
Nandor he is jealous that probably this is a point
at which you could use mesmerism and it's like, you know, warranted.
So Nandor uses it, and we see them all like
walk out, walk out of the police station, being saluted
(37:31):
by everybody as they go by, and I loved it
when they When Nandor is like, what exactly did you
tell them? Leslow asks, and Nandor says, oh, I told
them that we solved all of the crimes that these
guys committed. And also I said that I am Captain
(37:54):
Sully Sullenberger or Sullenberg, and you are that guy that
you like from that TV show who is apparently Tom
Selleck on Blue Bloods, which is not a show that
I have seen. And so everybody is saluting them as
they leave because of this, which is hilarious. But you, guys,
(38:18):
Captain Sully's sullen Is it sullen Burger? I have to
look this up. This is gonna bother me. Sully sullen Burger.
It is Burger, guys. This dude is from my town
where I currently live, in Dennison. And my friend did
(38:41):
this incredible mural. It's like thirty feet high and it
took a whole summer. It was so much work. They
did this incredible job. It's absolutely beautiful of Sully and
the plane and it's like it's like a portrait combined
(39:01):
with like a almost a collage of like relevant imagery
and everything, and there was supposed to be this whole
ceremony to unveil it, and Sully was gonna be there.
They have told my friend every year for like three
years that Sully's coming this year and we're gonna do
the unveiling, and it has never happened, and it's such
(39:24):
a bummer. My friend at this point has like resigned
resigned themselves to the fact that it's not happening. We're
not this is never going to be a thing. He
just doesn't care likely enough Sully. I mean, but uh,
oh my god, y'all. I kept being so excited about
it and being like, oh my god, I'm gonna come,
I'm gonna meet Sully and see this awesome mural. And
(39:47):
every year, every year it's just like, oh, psych, yeah,
that's not sorry about it, But no, that's not happening, y'all.
I every time I hear Sully's name, that is meately
what I think of. So anyway, that's how they wind
up getting out of it. And now we are going
(40:09):
to go over to what's happening with Guillermo. So Guillermo
goes back to Derek to ask him, So, my guy,
how long did it take for you to wind up
a vampire? Because I you know, you bit me like
how long ago now and nothing, it hasn't happened, So
(40:32):
what's the deal. And it turns out for Derek he
said something like six to eight hours, which, uh, the
girl that Naja turned, it took several days. It wasn't.
It wasn't no six to eight hours type thing. She
it took like a full day for her to really
(40:54):
start feeling like she was getting sick, and then eventually
there was like her seeing to be dead and her
roommate calling the ambulance and everything, and so you know,
we had a couple days of this before eventually she
finally like was overwhelmed with bloodlust and like took somebody
(41:15):
down finally. But six to eight hours, that's really really fast,
And like, if you're kind of thinking about it in
terms of maybe, however fast it worked for the person
who turned you, it may work as quickly for you,
And there's no real reason to think that would be true.
(41:36):
But like, you know, I am somebody who tries to
find patterns and correlations in things, and I might look
at that and try and use that as like, Okay,
well perhaps that means I can expect XYZ. So the
fact that it has been over two weeks and still nothing,
when this dude had to happen in less than half
(41:57):
a day, that is baffling. So Derek, like, what they
decide to do is they go to the baron to
ask him have you ever heard of this? And the
baron's also talking to I can't remember his name, but
the gargoyle dude whose I can't recall what his name is,
(42:18):
forgive me, but yeah, they are asking them like, is
this something y'all have ever run into before? Like what
the fuck? And neither of them has ever heard of
such a thing before, which is worrisome. And this is
what's making me think that it has something to do
with Guiermo's bloodline. I you know, again, I don't have
(42:42):
any evidence. I'm just sort of thinking, like, what's something
that would make the most sense, And that's really the
only thing I can think of. But eventually the baron
is like, oh, there's this guy outside who I he
turned in because the guy kept waking up in the
morning and turning on his leaf blower. And then and
(43:05):
you guys, that is the most relatable shit I have
ever heard of this dude is out here in the
morning when this guy is trying to go to sleep.
Have you ever lived next door to like tell me,
tell me guys that I am not the only one
where I live now, not nearly so much of a thing.
(43:27):
But when I lived in Philadelphia, which is really what's
sort of funny about it, because Philadelphia, he would not
think that I would be next to people who even
owned lawn care stuff, since we all had like a
sort of postage stamp sized yard. But because people did
have such a small yard, they were very meticulous with
(43:48):
it a lot, and so people would have like weed
whackers and stuff, and they would be starting these bitches
up at like seven point thirty in the morning on
a Saturday. And you know, I get it. You want
to get stuff done when it's still cool outside. It's
light out but it's not hot, get it done for
the day, go in and shower and get on with
(44:09):
your day. And I fucking sympathize. But also that shit
is loud as hell and it's a weekend and we
want to sleep in, and what the fuck is wrong
with you? Like that's really always what it comes down to.
For me. It's like what the fuck is the matter
with you? Do you not consider anybody else in your vicinity?
And it gets into your fucking bones and vibrates it's
(44:31):
so loud. So anyway, I completely was on his side
with this, and the dude is like really nice too,
which makes it all so sad. I love when he's
like my liege and the baron just goes ooop on
his nose and the dude seems to be like delighted
by it. I thought maybe this was gonna seem really
(44:52):
sort of condescending, but no, this guy is sort of like,
oh he booped me, like it was so cute. So
the theory that the baron is trying to work with
here is what if we try again with like the
turning thing, but with a different vampire, and maybe if
(45:15):
you do it again, He says something like, you know,
it might make you a double vampire, or it might
make you like half a vampire. I don't know what
it'll do, but it's worth a shot. So oddly, so,
Derek drinks some of his blood, and then he drinks
(45:39):
some of Derek's blood and it seems like nothing has happened.
The baron is like, how do you feel and he's like, oh,
you know, I feel fine. I'm just sort of irritated
because the belt on this machine. And then all of
a sudden, he just explodes like a water balloon. It
is so abrupt and so horrible. You guys, it was
(46:03):
so awful the way that all of them are splattered too.
It's gruesome. And nothing happens to Derek. It's like, apparently
sort of a fifty to fifty thing. What could go
wrong here? And I understand later when Leslow's suggests to Hiermo, well,
(46:30):
what if I talked to Nandor and convinced him to
bite you a second time? Maybe that would work? Understandably,
Garimona was like, I don't think that he might be fine.
Derek's fine, it seems, you know, but who wants to
(46:51):
take that risk. I don't like those odds either. I
am not blaming him at all for kind of shying
away from this. So I really can't imagine why that
even happened to that poor guy. I feel bad for him.
I really do, like, you know, ouch, that sucks. He
(47:11):
was just having a good old time being a vampire
working on his lawn. Shit, why can't he just have
lived in peace. Oh the poor thing. So what it
turns out happens later is Guierremo anybody who has watched
(47:32):
like A Three's Company who that's sort of my go to,
as it is for so many people for like the
plot of a show that's full of high jinks and
silly assumptions and people like overhearing the wrong parts of
phone calls or conversations and leaping to the wrong conclusions.
(47:53):
He should know better. But Guillermo gets approached by Laslow,
who's like, hey, dude, I don't know what the fuck
you think you're hiding, but it's become very obvious that
there is some shit going on, and the longer you
(48:13):
keep it quiet, the worse it's going to get. So
you had better unburden yourself. And Ghiamo's like, wait what,
and he says something else that sort of implies that
he knows what's going on, which, of course we know
that's not what's happening here. But Giermo is just so
(48:34):
riddled with guilt at this point that he is jumping
to all the wrong conclusions. So finally he just blurts out, well,
I just felt so guilty. I didn't want him to
know he just kept saying that he was gonna bite me,
and he never did, so that's why I went to
somebody else. And of course at this point, Lazlo holds
(48:56):
his hands up and it's just like whoa, whoa, whoa,
what the fuck? You got bit by somebody else? And
Gamma realizes that he has made a terrible mistake and
just told his secret and is horrified, rightfully so, and
just like wait what, Oh my god, I thought that
you knew what was wait wait wait, but it's too late.
(49:20):
And if anybody was going to find out, Laslow is
the one Laslow. He is the one that's most willing
to break rules in a general sense than anybody. Naja.
She sticks to rules because it makes her feel more comfortable,
and she has a very strong sense of like you
(49:43):
are going to get what you have, like reap what
you've sown, basically right. And I am also in a
lot of ways that sort of person. But I also
am willing to like cut slack for friends depending on
what it is that they have fucked up on. She
(50:03):
does not consider Gama a friend, so that wouldn't even
be a factor. And then, of course you know Nandor
is the one, so he's not. And Colin Robinson would
just thrive off the conflict of telling everybody what it
is that Guillamo had done. So that's gonna be a
(50:23):
whole different kind of nightmare that he would enjoy so much.
So yeah, nobody but Laslow, I don't think is going
to be cool about this, you know what I'm saying.
I'm just trying to like imagine anyone else finding out
like how that would go. And I don't know how
(50:45):
long Laslow keeps this secret. Either he is he tends
to be able to keep secrets, I feel like, or
he has sort of sense of obligation about it, you know,
which he did with Colin Robinson as well. So I
(51:08):
don't I've been trying to think, like, eventually this information
has to come out, and how does that happen? And
my instinct is that Giermo fucks up, not that Laslow
tells on him, but I think that Laslow could be
driven to tell on him by Guermo doing something that
(51:32):
Laslow perceives as really really shitty. I don't know what
that would even look like, but I could just see
Laslow blurting it out in a moment of horror at like,
I can't believe that you would throw me under the
bus when I had been keeping such and such a
secret forever. The it would have to be something that
(51:52):
he did sort of suddenly without really thinking it through,
because he when Gemo says, please don't tell nan Or,
Laslow's reaction is tell Nandor. I don't think he'd even
survive that, Like he considers not telling Nandor to be
(52:13):
a service to Nandor, not to Giermo. And that's why
I really don't feel all that worried about him, like
you know, spilling the beans. But he can let his
temper get the better of him sometimes, So that's sort
of what's on my mind there. It's just like, yeah,
(52:34):
I know that you don't think you would tell, and
I don't think you would if you had a moment
to stop and ask yourself, is this a good idea?
But Laslow can be a bit impulsive sometimes and you know,
I don't know' that's my uh my guess is that
(52:55):
it's if I were going to say who's more likely
to fuck it up? Or Giarmo, I'm gonna say Guirmo.
But I don't think it's completely out of the question
that Laslo fucks it up. So yeah, that's that. I'm
trying to see if there was anything else that I forgot.
(53:17):
Oh my god, I forgot about one of the guys
shooting the gun off as well, because Sean tells him
to like empty out the bullets and so he just
begins to fire it off randomly at the air yauy.
These tudes are so like. And I also I forgot
to mention how evil Mabel is attempting to get like
(53:42):
she's trying to ask whether or not Naja has ever
harmed anyone? And oh interesting, So okay, she snacha if
Naja has ever harmed anyone, and Naja keeps saying no,
(54:04):
and Evil Mabel is just like are you sure? Are you?
Are you really really sure? It hadn't occurred to me.
I just thought Evil Mabel was just like fucking with
Naja to try and make Naja be nicer. But did
Evil Mabel actually put a hex on Naja? Like is
(54:27):
this hex real? It never entered my mind that she
had put a genuine hex on her. I thought she
was tricking her into thinking there was a hex so
as to like attempt to forge a relationship between the
two of them and bond them through attempting to take
this fake hex off. But maybe Evil Mabel felt pissed
(54:52):
at the way Naja treated her and actually hext her.
I never thought of that, but maybe that's what's happening,
because like that whole scene is preceded by one where
Naja is lamenting how she doesn't have any close female friends,
and Evil Mabel is looking at the camera like, what
(55:13):
the fuck she said? I thought over the past year
that we had gotten pretty close. Same last season they
were together a lot. I had thought also that they
were becoming very friendly. And when she keeps being like,
you don't have any female friends seriously, and Nanja keeps
saying nope, not one. She never actually says what about me,
(55:34):
it's implied, and Naja never picks up on that, because
of course she doesn't, because she's just not She's just
not the type to notice anybody else. That's just really
what that comes down to in the end, is just
a complete lack of awareness. She is so self absorbed.
(55:58):
But yeah, so maybe that's what's going on that I
never even thought of that. I feel really silly now,
but maybe that's Uh, Guys, tell me if that's what
you think was going on, because that had not occurred
to me. So I'm trying to see if there's anything
else I miss but I'm pretty sure that I covered everything. Yeah,
(56:20):
so I'm a little under time here, but I feel
okay with that because I've touched all of my bassis.
I'm pretty sure. I'm so excited, though, you guys, I
don't know what to expect about. You know, Giemo's transformation.
It the one thing that he manages to do this
(56:41):
episode when Derek is like, have you tried to become
a bat? And he becomes a bat and flies around
for a second. When Gearmo tries to do it, it's
just two giant bat wings come out of the sides
of his head like ears, like he looks like Gizmo
for a second, which I guess he has been called Gizmo,
(57:02):
which didn't think of that, But I don't think there's
a connection. But so he's able to like almost do
something but not really so, but that's new. Right, last
time he tried to become a bat, nothing happened, So
he's inching along. I just don't know if it's ever
(57:24):
getting where he thinks it's going. Or if he's stalling
out and that's the problem. So so curious. I'm very
excited to see where this is going. All right, kiddos, well,
I will be seeing you very shortly with a new episode.
I hope you're enjoying the coverage. And until then, to
Luma the fuckers. That was an unspoiled network past
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