July 15, 2025 • 42 mins
What if confidence is something you uncover through surrender? Julie Kendall, an award-winning actress who left corporate America to pursue her creative dreams, reveals how letting go opened doors she never imagined.
"This is our one shot in this body. Why not go for it as far as you possibly can?" Julie's philosophy has guided her through bold moves like packing her car and moving to Atlanta with no safety net. That leap of faith led to unexpected opportunities, including a specially-created position with a former employer who had been quietly admiring her acting journey from afar for years.
Julie shares her transformative daily practice that combines meditation, candle rituals, and journaling—a practice that takes just thirty minutes but has manifested remarkable results in her career and personal life. She describes writing each morning as if her perfect day has already happened, feeling the emotions and visualizing success before it materializes. Her candid conversation with "the universe" through a candle flame offers a unique approach to spiritual connection that anyone can adapt.
Most powerfully, Julie reframes our relationship with fear. Drawing from Elizabeth Gilbert's wisdom, she explains how she thanks fear for its protective role while firmly relegating it to "the back seat" of her life. "Fear never goes away," Julie acknowledges, "but I don't need you in the front seat anymore." This perspective allows her to appreciate even challenging emotions like jealousy as guideposts rather than sources of shame.
Whether you're considering a career change, creative pursuit, or simply seeking more confidence in daily life, Julie's practical wisdom offers a refreshing alternative to conventional advice. Her approach demonstrates that true confidence emerges not from controlling outcomes but from surrendering to your authentic self and trusting the process.
Ready to transform your relationship with confidence? Follow @therealjuliekendall on Instagram to learn more about Julie's wellness practices and acting career, or check out her health-focused content aimed at helping people thrive from the inside out.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Welcome to the Confidence Shortcut, the podcast
for ambitious creatives andentrepreneurs who are ready to
stop overthinking, take boldaction and finally step into the
life they've been dreamingabout.
I'm your host, nikki Sterner.
Mom, actor, comedian andproducer.
After years of playing smalland waiting to feel ready, I
went on a courage quest andfound a shortcut to confidence.
(00:21):
Each week, I'll bring you realstories, simple steps and
conversations with experts inmindset courage and confidence,
plus heart-to-hearts with fellowcreatives who are turning their
dreams into reality.
It's time to get unstuck andstart showing up.
Let's dive in.
Welcome to the ConfidenceShortcut.
I'm Nikki Sterner, your host.
(00:42):
Today's guest is Julie Kendall,an award-winning actress and
former sales manager, whodiscovered her passion for
performing in the mostunexpected way through a public
speaking class meant to calm hernerves.
That one class changedeverything, leading her to leave
corporate life and fully pursuestorytelling.
You may recognize her fromTyler Perry's If Loving you Is
(01:02):
Wrong on OWN, cobra Kai onNetflix, the Singles Guidebook
on UP TV and the 2B thrillerSugar Mama.
Julie's not only a powerhouseon screen, but also a wellness
advocate and a globetrottingadventurer.
She's rappelled cliffs, gonewhitewater rafting and is always
chasing what lights her up.
I can't wait for you to hearabout her journey.
(01:23):
Welcome to the show, julieKendall.
Hello, so nice to have you here.
You're so much fun and you'rejust a wealth of knowledge,
especially for creatives andactives.
You're doing so much and so I'mjust so excited to get into
your story.
If you could just give us aquick snapshot, tell us a little
bit about who you are, what youdo and what you're passionate
(01:45):
about right now.
Speaker 2 (01:59):
Wow, okay, who I am inside of me that decided to say
yes and go for it and leftalmost everything you know that
I was comfortable with behind topursue it, and I guess I would
say that I'm an adventure seekerin every aspect of my life.
I was talking to a friend ofmine this morning and I was, you
(02:21):
know, talking to her about someof the questions that you had
written down there and Irealized that I've done some
pretty dramatic things thatpeople would say are dramatic in
my life, and not because I wastrying to stand out, but because
I just believe this is our oneshot in this body.
Why not go for it as far as youpossibly can, and what's the
(02:42):
worst that can happen?
So I would say that I'm a lover.
I do as much as I can to loveas much as I can and to love
myself, to love the world, tolove the people in the world and
to love the life that I create.
So that's it.
Speaker 1 (03:00):
You know, and that that is totally the aura that
you put off every time I've beenin your presence is this aura
of love and connection, and youdo a really nice job of making
people feel loved and welcomedaround you.
That's just one of your gifts.
That's a beautiful thing.
Speaker 2 (03:15):
Tell me what you're working on for acting right now
been on a really cool showthat's actually on social media.
There's this whole new wave ofproduction that began a few
years ago called VerticalFilming, and at first I was like
, huh, I don't know about this.
But then, you know, theopportunity came up.
(03:36):
It was miraculous how it cameup and I just said yes to it,
which I often do, because younever know, and I love it so
much.
I just want to continue, and Ilove being on set.
It's called Country Wayne andthat's with a K, k-o-u-n-t-r-y
Wayne, and it's on Facebook,tiktok and YouTube and it's
(04:00):
basically mini soap operas.
They're three-minute-longepisodes and they're all soap
operas.
They're three minute longepisodes and they're all soap
operas and it's so much fun Ican't even explain it.
So that's been fantastic.
He does very, very well.
This guy, country Wayne,started it I want to say maybe
like 2017, ish and he just threwit to the wall.
(04:22):
He's a filmmaker and thingswere not going positively
between COVID and the strike.
It was really difficult to findwork.
So he said I'm just going to dothis myself, which a lot of
people are doing now, and Icommend them for it.
I think it's really amazing howpeople just don't sit in pity
they just say, yes, I'm going totry something new and see what
(04:43):
works.
And he tried this and it's beenso successful.
On Facebook he has, I think,9.6 million followers, so that's
amazing.
My character I go by Julie andshe's a Southern woman.
She's very wealthy, self-made.
A little bit was received froma divorce, so she's a little bit
(05:05):
of a shyster.
She's very manipulative andcontrolling and people are
catching on to her manipulation,but it's nonstop surprises,
which is so much fun.
And, by the way, it's allimprovised, 100% improvised.
There's no script.
We are told different thingsthat need to be brought out in
(05:26):
the scene and different emotions, but everything is 100%
improvised.
So, wow, what an experience.
Talk about confidence booster,that is, try improvising a show
or any, you know, because you dostand up and improvise as well.
So you know, but doingimprovisation with drama is also
(05:47):
really cool.
It's just so cool.
I love it.
I love it.
So, yeah, talk about growth onthe spot.
Speaker 1 (05:55):
Think of what to say.
I would love to do that.
I mean just to have ideas andjust start recording, and it's
obviously a professional setup.
They've got all the lighting,or how far do they take it with
the vertical filming?
Speaker 2 (06:09):
Well, here's the thing that is so amazing with
this project.
I think with other verticalprojects it's a little bit more
elaborate.
With this it's a little bit oflighting, very little, no extra
sound.
It's on a cell phone and verylittle, little to no editing.
So it is, yeah, it's justfilmed Basically.
(06:32):
There's no cutaways, so it'sjust going back and forth in
between each person and if it'sa good cinematographer they are
able to capture whatever it isthey need to capture.
But it's really amazing.
The quality is beautiful.
You wouldn't even know that itshot on a cell phone.
You wouldn't know that there'sno extra sound.
(06:54):
And then I just booked something.
I'm so super excited.
It's shooting in Shreveport,louisiana, and I tell you, you
just never know what's going tohappen.
So I got a message saying I wasbooked and it's like a low
budget SAG film short film andshooting in Shreveport.
(07:16):
They reached out and said we'reconsidering you for the role.
How would you feel about comingto Shreveport, traveling here?
And so I wrote back and I said,wow, honored, so honored, and
love traveling for work.
It's one of my favorite thingswhen I get to shoot out of town.
It's like I just I can'texplain what it does to me.
It just lights me up so much.
(07:36):
And I said if you have a travelbudget, let me know I'll be
there.
And so I thought, okay, I'mreally putting a lot on them,
travel budget, short filmUsually they want local hire.
Only Lo and behold a few dayslater.
How would you feel about flyingin doing this?
Blah, blah, blah, we got aplace, a house, we have a room
(07:57):
for you.
How would you feel about it?
And I was like book me and so,yay, congratulations.
You got to put yourself outthere, really and just trust it.
And if it didn't work out, atleast I advocated for myself.
Speaker 1 (08:14):
Yeah, you asked for what you wanted.
What a powerful feeling.
Speaker 2 (08:19):
Amazing, Amazing.
It was so powerful.
Not just booking it.
Booking it was amazing.
It was so powerful, not justbooking it booking, it was
amazing Booking it being able toshoot out of town.
Even more amazing thanadvocating for myself and just
putting myself out there andtrusting it, and then it coming
through.
Wow, you can't have a betterfeeling than that.
Speaker 1 (08:39):
You know that is self-care.
I love that because you had theconfidence to ask for what you
needed, instead of a lot oftimes we back away like, oh, I
probably I shouldn't ask, Ishouldn't ask for that, I'm
asking for too much for myself,versus realizing your worth and
asking for it and receiving it.
That's so powerful and that'sso confident.
I love that.
Speaker 2 (08:59):
And it could have gone in the other direction.
But I have to take the gamblebecause if that didn't work out,
something else will come along,and that's the other thing that
has taken so long to realize,and I really want to impart that
to the people that watch this.
We put so much on everything wedo and we have to just do it,
(09:20):
let it go and trust it.
If it doesn't happen, there's areason.
We can't try to even figure outwhat that reason is, but we
have to let it go and just knowthat something else will come
along.
We just can't.
We can't hold on holding on.
All it does is hurt us.
It doesn't hurt anybody else,it hurts us.
And I always say this to mybest friend when he complains
(09:44):
about stuff.
I always say to him why are yousaying that to my best friend?
Why are you talking to my bestfriend that way?
Because self-talk.
Oh my gosh.
We beat ourselves up so much,we put so much pressure on
ourselves.
We bulge this rampage ofnegative thoughts.
We've got to stop doing that,because we got to take better
(10:08):
care of ourselves.
Speaker 1 (10:10):
Do you have those thoughts that come up and what
do you do to quiet them or dealwith them?
Speaker 2 (10:16):
Yeah, I do as much as I possibly can every single day
to strengthen my mind, justlike we go to the gym and work
on our bodies, just like we eat.
Really well our minds, we havechoices and we have to stop
ourselves mid-sentence and sayis this the truth?
Is that the truth or is thereanother option?
(10:39):
Because it's partly a lazy mind, it's a pre-programmed mind,
it's a habit that we're used to.
But we can change that.
We have the power to change ourthoughts.
And boy, I tell you, it is asimple process but it takes.
Just like going to the gym.
You don't see the results unlessyou work on it daily.
(11:01):
You know like if you go to thegym, you're not gonna see your
body change overnight.
It's gonna take three months,six months a year to really see
vast differences in your body.
Same thing with your mind.
You have to really be aware andcatch those thoughts.
As soon as you start to feellike, ooh, that doesn't feel
(11:22):
good, you have to recognize it.
That doesn't feel good.
When I say that or when I thinkthat that thought does not feel
good, what can I do to replaceit?
And don't get me wrong, I fallinto the cracks a lot and I have
to stop myself sometimes.
I had some things that come upthis weekend and I fell into the
cracks and it took me reachingout to somebody that I worked
(11:46):
with for many years and I stillcontinue to work with her.
She's a spiritual coach, a lifecoach, so I text her a lot and
I just say this is what happened, this is what I'm going through
, any suggestions, and thenshe'll usually send me a video
from someone like Abraham Hicks.
I don't know if you've heard ofher or not, but she's a
renowned spiritual motivationalspeaker Amazing.
(12:07):
She usually will send me avideo and she'll be like oh gosh
, that's so funny.
I just heard a video thismorning and it's kind of on the
subject of what you're talkingabout here it is.
So she'll send it to me andI'll listen to that.
And then I'll do my meditationwork and I do a ritual and I
write in my journal and, beforeyou know it, I've worked my way
through back to those stablethoughts, those positive
(12:31):
thoughts.
I'm hesitant to use the wordpositive Because people always
think that's hokey.
You know they're like oh, comeon whatever.
But I'll just say that it's amore self loving thought.
Speaker 1 (12:45):
Do you write in your journal, Julie, like every
morning?
Can you tell us what you gothrough?
Speaker 2 (12:50):
Yes, it's a little different every day, but for the
most part I write as if the dayhas already happened.
So I write as if it's 10o'clock at night and I'm
reflecting on day, and I writeit exactly how I would have
wanted that day to be.
And as I'm writing it, I startfeeling all the things that I'm
(13:14):
writing about.
It's almost like a child that'sdaydreaming.
Or you know how we played whenwe were younger.
It's almost like that.
So when I'm writing it, I'mwriting it exactly how I would
have wanted it to go, and Istart feeling the excitement
(13:35):
Like, for example, I'll saytoday was so magical.
I went to work and everybodysmiled at me today and that's
because I made sure that I feltso excited everywhere that I
went.
People complimented me, peopleinteracted with me in fun and
exciting ways.
(13:56):
My job even though it's amundane job.
I envisioned that I was the CEOof the company and that I was
just going out and helping tomake sure that my accounts are
satisfied and that my reps aredoing a great job, and I sang
through the day.
The sun was shining.
Those are just a few of thethings I ate amazing, so my body
feels great.
(14:16):
I took some time to work out.
Even though I didn't have a lotof time today for extra
activity, I made sure that I didsome ab work and some core work
and some balance work and boy,it was such a beautiful day.
My heart is full and I feel solucky and blessed and things
like that.
I'll sometimes go a little bitfurther and talk about if I have
(14:37):
an audition that day.
I'll talk about how theaudition went, how I breathed
into it and felt so good aboutmy work and you know, blah, blah
, blah.
I just do things like that andI write that and by the time I
get to my journal, I've alreadydone my meditation.
I've done a little ritual thatI do each day with a candle
lighting and talking with ahigher power, and then I stop
(15:00):
and write in my journal andafter I'm done with all of that,
I feel like I literally won thelottery.
It just feels so good.
It totally shifts everything.
Most people would say that'sexcessive.
But is it really?
If it's something that reallyworks and makes you feel good,
(15:21):
is that excessive?
I don't think so.
I think not doing it is missingout.
I think you're missing out onall the great nuggets that
potentially come your waybecause you feel so differently,
because we're energy, right orenergy, and I will tell you that
since I started doing all thisbetween my meditation, the
(15:43):
candle lighting and thejournaling and then I do
affirmations as well, throughoutthe day, a lot of times as well
but since I've been doing that,I've had one of my best years
as an actor and financially,last year that I've had in a
long time in this year has beenamazing.
Speaker 1 (16:00):
So I created the confidence kickstart morning
routine because I know what it'slike to have big dreams and
still feel stuck behindself-doubt, fear or the pressure
to get it right.
As an actor, comedian and awardwinning filmmaker, I've been on
over 50 stages, but confidencedidn't come first.
Action and habits did.
This free guide gives you theexact 15-minute routine I use
(16:23):
every morning, with journalprompts, a guided audio
meditation and a simplestep-by-step process built on
the three pillars of theConfident Shortcut Mindset, path
and Action.
These aren't just feel-goodideas.
They're habits that work, thatbuild confidence, that move you
forward.
If you're ready to stopoverthinking and start showing
up the link is in the caption Gograb it and start your day with
(16:45):
clarity, courage and realmomentum.
Wow, that is absolutelyincredible.
I'm curious, julie how longdoes this take you in the
morning?
Is this like an hour routine?
Speaker 2 (17:00):
So in bed I listen to a guided meditation, and if I
have more time that morning, ifI wake up early enough or I have
more time, I'll listen to alonger one.
If not, I just listen to itlike a five to six minute one.
Speaker 1 (17:15):
Where do you get those?
Speaker 2 (17:16):
On Insight Timer.
I love Insight Timer.
There are a number of ones outthere.
Yeah, that I was led to andI've been using it for probably
10 years now.
Love it, wow, yeah, I love it.
You can get it for free, whichis amazing.
And what's even more amazing isthat they send you a plethora
(17:38):
of choices and you get to decidewhich one you want to listen to
, depending on how long, whatyou want to work on, what you
feel called to.
Sometimes I listen to abundance, sometimes I listen to
financials, sometimes I listento letting go, some surrendering
.
You know, it just depends on Ifeel like I need that morning or
that night.
(17:58):
I listened to it twice a day,actually, before I go to sleep.
I fell asleep to an timermeditation as well, and then
also I, throughout the day, likewhen I'm getting ready, I'll
oftentimes listen to an AbrahamHicks segment as well, and I get
those on YouTube.
They're free, so I'll do thatwhen I'm in the shower or when
I'm getting ready, I'll listento them as well, cause those are
(18:21):
amazing reminders too.
But no, the actual ritual thatI do between meditating,
stretching because I stretchevery morning while I'm in bed
as well, because I want to.
I stretch and then I tap mybody to like kind of get my
circulation.
I kick my legs.
I want to get my circulationgoing, my heart pumping, right
(18:42):
in bed.
I do that, I listen to mymeditation, I do my stretching,
I do my stimulation and then Iget up and I do my candle
lighting and my journaling and Iwant to say maybe a half hour.
Speaker 1 (18:55):
Can you tell me about the candle lighting?
I'm curious because I havenever done that other than to do
a burning ritual ceremony thingto get rid of past beliefs that
weren't serving me.
But I've never heard of oneevery morning.
I'm curious.
Tell me about that please.
Speaker 2 (19:09):
So it was suggested for me to do and it was very
specific how somebody suggestedit and I've made it my own.
So I'm going to give you my waythat I'm doing it, but there is
no right way or wrong way.
It's really feeling into it.
So I have a candelabra Is thatwhat it's called?
It's like a candlestick, one ofthe tall ones, tall, thin ones,
(19:29):
and that's what was suggestedfor me, and I have it in a
candle holder and I just in myliving room it's quiet, I light
the candle and I actually justget quiet for a minute and I
talk out loud about somethingthat I want answers to,
something that I feel like Iwant to address.
(19:53):
For example, this morning I hadremnants of kind of some
challenge I had over the weekend.
I woke up with feeling a littlebit ambivalent, like a little
off center.
So I call it the universe, callit whatever you want.
Source God.
However, you refer to yourhigher power.
So I basically just sayuniverse.
(20:17):
I really want to talk to youabout how I'm feeling this
morning and I want some clarityabout why I'm feeling this way.
This is what I'm feeling.
Can you give me some clarity?
And I'll sit still for a minuteand then I'll hear higher than
myself.
A lot of people say it's yourhigher self, some people say
it's God.
I'm open to whatever it is thatis greater than me.
(20:38):
It could be, like I said, myhigher self, it could be the
universe talking to me, godtalking to me, but basically I
will hear.
Well, julie, I'm so glad youasked me that, because this is
my perspective on this.
This is what I see.
What do you think of that?
And I'll just have aconversation.
And before I know it, it's soamazing because I will get
(21:00):
clearer perspective than I everhave just by to what source is
sharing with me.
And we all have the answersinside.
This is the.
We all have the answers.
And if we don't have theminside us, we have access to
them.
We have the answers if we juststop and get it and allow them
(21:21):
to come through for us.
So, basically, those answerscome through for me and then, a
lot of times, my higher powerwill say write in your journal
right now, write about this.
Or, after I'm done gettingwhatever information I need,
I'll snuff out my candle.
I never blow it out, I snuff itout.
That's what I was doing.
Speaker 1 (21:41):
What does that mean?
Speaker 2 (21:42):
I use a little thing to put it out instead of blowing
it out.
From what I understand, myfriend that shared this ritual
with me said don't ever blow thecandle out, and I don't
remember what the reason was,but this is my interpretation.
There is no right way or wrongway.
I'm sure if you blow the candleout you're not going to jinx
anything or ruin everything, butfrom a ritualistic perspective,
(22:04):
for habit I just snuff it outwith a little glass thing you
can use like a metal thing justto put it out.
I always feel fulfilled becauseI've gotten information that I
needed to hear.
And then when I startjournaling a lot of times I
mentioned that I write about myday, but it includes what I
(22:24):
learned in there the universe orsource will say to me write
down what it is that you want meto work on for you.
When I do that as well, almostalways things happen, like
almost immediately.
Money shows up, a bookinghappens, something happens, it's
just amazing.
Somebody reaches out to me, anopportunity shows up something,
(22:48):
so it's just amazing.
Somebody reaches out to me, anopportunity shows up something,
so it's very powerful.
A written word is so powerful.
And then these conversationswith source, so powerful.
But, more importantly, theself-reflection is just
unbelievable, and this helpsstrengthen the mind.
(23:10):
Back to what we were talkingabout before, allowing me to get
in with making a differentchoice instead of just falling
into that old habit, that oldchoice that I felt comfortable,
comfortably uncomfortable in.
We're all human.
(23:31):
We all have that happen, andthis does not happen overnight.
I went through 11 years ofworking on and off with a
spiritual coach.
I've gone to counseling.
I believe in counseling whenyou need it.
I believe in whatever practiceyou do.
Some people pray, some peoplebelieve in doing that daily.
(23:54):
I believe whatever it is thatgrounds you allows you to
communicate with somethinggreater than yourself.
And meditating are soincredibly important because it
strengthens the mind.
Speaker 1 (24:11):
I took so much out of this conversation.
This is so powerful, thisroutine that you have every
morning and you said you dosomething at night as well
Listen to a guided audio.
I do the same thing.
I think it's super helpful,Like you said, resetting in the
morning and at night so thatwhen you're asleep, your brain
is also thinking thoughts thatyou want and working on
(24:32):
something that you might needhelp with.
I can't tell you how much theconversation with the universe.
That is probably the main thingI'm going to take away, because
I don't do that right now.
I know that I probably should,but that's something that's
missing is that quietconversation and then listen.
(24:53):
I feel like I'm a little busyright now doing instead of
stopping and listening, and Ilove the candle part of it
because that is like an activesomething that you can do and
gives me focus, and there's anenergy, a warmth to that,
something about fire.
I don't know what it is.
Maybe you could tell us what itis about the fire that brings
(25:16):
the attention and the energyright there.
Speaker 2 (25:20):
You know I'm not a hundred percent sure, but I will
tell you that and I meant tosay this before.
Thank you for reminding me,because everything you just said
kind of reminded me, it broughtit together.
I was visualizing the wholething and then I realized I
actually talked to the candle.
The universe to me is the flame, the flame.
(25:42):
The universe is the flame or thesource, god, whatever is the
flame, and I oftentimes will seemovement in the flame, even
though there's nothing in theroom that's moving, and it's
just a reminder that somethingis there listening to me, with
me, and sometimes the flame getsbigger, sometimes it gets
(26:03):
smaller, Sometimes it moves,sometimes it just does so many
things and it's just areiteration to me that there's
something greater than me inthis flame.
For me it just insinuates thegreater power, because fire,
it's a power.
So for me the significance isit is the universe in a form, in
(26:29):
some type of form, because itis like a lit up, bright,
effervescent power.
Yeah, that's very great.
Speaker 1 (26:40):
That's a great description, thank you.
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(27:01):
system, the part of the brainresponsible for fear, fight or
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If this speaks to you, clickthe link in the caption.
It might be the answer you'relooking for.
Okay, we're going to go intothe confidence quickfire round
(27:21):
now I have five questions.
I'd love to ask you.
Speaker 2 (27:24):
Sure.
Speaker 1 (27:25):
Okay.
So as a creative artist,working actor, I want to know
for you how do you defineconfidence?
Speaker 2 (27:37):
I think confidence is surrender, surrender.
I think when we let go andallow our authentic self to come
through, we are really our bestselves, our best and brightest
(28:05):
selves.
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (28:09):
That's beautiful Surrender.
I love that.
Speaker 2 (28:11):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (28:13):
That's so true, Like when we cannot put on the facade
and just be.
That is true confidence.
Speaker 2 (28:20):
Raw.
I do my best auditions, when Ijust let go, I just let go my
best work.
I see, when I'm in my head,when I'm thinking about the
lines, when I'm not comfortablewith the material, whatever it
is, I see that I have notsurrendered and I'm just trying
to do something.
(28:41):
Trying and it's surrendering,not trying Just being.
Speaker 1 (28:48):
That's so good, that's so helpful.
Speaker 2 (28:50):
Yeah, true, yeah, and that takes work too.
That's part of the formula withthis whole ritual and
journaling and talking with theuniverse and this whole state of
mind.
It comes with allowing yourselfto surrender because, yeah,
confidence in letting go is ittakes confidence to let go.
Speaker 1 (29:15):
That's beautiful, yeah, okay, here's my second
question for you, julie.
What's one bold move that youmade before you felt ready?
Speaker 2 (29:24):
Moving to Atlanta from South Florida.
Yeah, I went through a divorceand an opportunity came up to
stay in someone's house inGeorgia and somebody that I knew
from the films, fromauditioning and being in her
(29:45):
films two of her films and shehad a house here and I think
three of us moved in with her in2014.
I said yes, the opportunitycame up and I was trying to
figure out what to do with mylife and I just said yes and I
literally packed up whatever Icould in my car, left all my
furniture, except for somenightstands I think that was the
(30:08):
only furniture I took andbedding, but no furniture.
I just left everything behindand put one of those things on
top of my roof and crossed intoGeorgia and started my new life.
Wow, and that was almost 11years ago.
So I wasn't like young I'm notsaying I'm old, but I wasn't
(30:31):
like in my twenties and moved inwith four of us in this house,
four ladies, and I let go of mycomfort zone all around me and
just stepped into it and had noidea what I was going to get
myself into.
But I said yes and, by the way,from letting go and saying yes
(30:57):
and just trusting.
Everything came together for me.
It was amazing.
A job showed up for me from anemployer that I worked for, had
worked for 20 years before that.
They followed me on.
I posted a picture as I crossedover into the state of Georgia
Welcome to Georgia.
And I wrote my new home.
(31:17):
And she, the owner of thecompany, saw my post and said
why are you moving to Georgia?
And I hadn't talked to her forlike 10 years.
And she said why are you movingto Georgia?
And I said how did you know I'mmoving to Georgia?
She said I've been followingyour acting career on Facebook.
And I said oh my gosh.
And I told her I'm changing mylife, I'm pursuing my dreams.
And she said do you need a job?
(31:38):
And I said I do.
And she said I don't know ifthere's any openings in Georgia,
but I'm going to speak with thesales manager and we'll see
what we can come up with.
And they created a job for me.
Speaker 1 (31:48):
You still have, or was that a different one?
Speaker 2 (31:50):
It is yeah, so I still.
I'm still there 11 years later.
Yeah, I'm still there part-time, and you love that job.
I do.
It's, yeah, it's that I lovethat job.
(32:20):
I like the job, it pays mybills and it allows me freedom
and flexibility.
It is if I could have writtendown what I would want and just
say universe, god, higher power,take care of me.
It happens, I'm not kidding.
Speaker 1 (32:36):
I love that so powerful You're such a powerful
manifester.
It's amazing.
I think you've covered this,but I'm just going to ask it and
you can briefly talk about ithow do you quiet your inner
critic?
Speaker 2 (32:48):
oh yeah, we did talk about that meditation candle
ritual, journaling, meditatingtwice a day, affirmations,
speaking with either a counselor, a really good counselor, or an
amazing life coach, or both.
My life coach is wow.
She's one of the most I'm goingto use the word delicious
(33:10):
individuals I've ever met.
Wow, she's a major manifesterand just got the most beautiful
heart of anyone.
She is my mentor, my dearfriend.
Speaker 1 (33:21):
Okay, and what's one habit that helped you build real
confidence?
I don't know if that's going tobe the routine that you do
every morning or if there'ssomething else that's a habit
that you do for confidence.
Speaker 2 (33:33):
All of that and saying yes, and just saying yes,
and not letting fear stop me.
Speaker 1 (33:41):
Did?
You used to have a lot of fearDid you used to have a lot of
fear.
Speaker 2 (33:47):
Yes, and I don't know how to say this quickly, but I
attended a seminar, or a retreat, I should say, with Elizabeth
Gilbert last year.
I don't know if you know whoshe is.
She wrote E, pray, love, yeah,and oh my God, if I can tell you
how I was able to attend this,it was amazing.
I got to go for free.
It was amazing, I manifested itwas amazing.
(34:09):
I got to go for free.
It was amazing, I manifested it.
It came to me, I manifested itand I worked it out so that I
was able to go for free.
I'm not joking, it was an 800plus.
Yeah, yeah, I was able to gofor free.
So, anyway, one of the thingsthat I love that she talked
about was about fear, and shesaid fear never goes away.
(34:31):
It's always there.
She said what she has learnedto do is she has learned to take
fear out of the front seat ofher car and put it in the back
seat.
She's had a conversation withfear and she says she said
something like this.
I'm not quoting her, but shesays fear.
I see you, I know you are in mylife for an incredibly
(34:54):
important reason and I thank youfor all of the things that you
have helped me to navigate in mylife.
You've brought me to where I amtoday and I know that if you
were not there, I would not bethis person.
But I don't need you in thefront seat anymore.
I'm not kicking you out of mylife.
I know I need you, but I'mputting you in the back seat and
(35:17):
I'm letting I think she saidmaybe confidence or whatever
else sit in the front seat.
You can sit in the back seatand I'm only allowing you to
talk to me when I ask you.
You are not allowed to sayanything unless I ask you.
And I was like, wow, so I dothat a lot in my ritual, I do
(35:41):
that a lot in my journal.
In my ritual, I talk todifferent parts of me.
I do that a lot of my journaland my ritual.
I talk to different parts of me.
I really try to identify, likeI have.
I'm going to say this is a veryvulnerable thing for me to say
and I'm going to say it becauseI feel like it needs to be said,
because there are so manypeople that don't talk about
this.
But jealousy, we all havejealousy.
We all look at someone else andgo why did she get that, or why
(36:05):
did he get that, or what did heget that, or why did they have
this much money, or why does youknow?
Why am I not?
We all have that.
And for a long time I judgedmyself for that and I had a
conversation with the universeand the universe basically said
it's gotten you to where you aretoday if you did not that.
(36:25):
And then it also asked me if Iever hurt anyone or did anything
hurtful, intentionally hurtful,with jealousy as a part of me
that was active and I never didanything hurtful.
So the universe said to me okay, now do you see how it was
healthy for you and how it gotyou to where you are today?
(36:45):
And I said now do you see howit was healthy for you and how
it got you to where you aretoday?
And I said I do, because Ijudged myself.
I was even afraid to say it.
I was afraid to say it out loud.
I realized, through aconversation with my coach and
then the universe, that it'sgotten me to where I am today,
but it was never used in amalicious or harmful way.
Speaker 1 (37:08):
Wow, that's a huge aha moment.
Speaker 2 (37:11):
So part of my ritual that I do is I talk about
different things that are taboo,that even we don't even want to
talk to ourselves about becausewe don't want to admit like, oh
, I'm jealous, I'm a jealousperson, but it's not in a
harmful way.
If I did something like reallyhurtful or harmful, that's a
different story, but even thenthat's where I was then.
(37:34):
Do you know what I'm saying?
I'm not that way anymore.
If I did so, even if you did dosomething, forgive yourself.
You're only human.
We're human.
We make errors.
We do things from where we arein that time in our lives.
Speaker 1 (37:48):
But anyway, I've heard Julie to use jealousy in a
positive way, like it istelling you what you actually
want, and so that's like aguidepost.
Oh, okay, that's letting meknow that it's possible.
Number one, they have it, I canhave it too.
And number two, that it'simportant to me to do that thing
, whatever it is that you'rejealous of.
So it sounds like maybe that'spushed you in that direction,
(38:08):
like to know what you want.
And the fact that you said Ithink we all have judged
ourselves or felt ashamed forbeing jealous or using it, but
the fact that you reflected backon it oh no, I haven't really
done it in a harmful way or useit in a harmful way that's
really a great lesson and agreat thing for us to take away
(38:29):
as listeners right now to thisconversation.
Speaker 2 (38:31):
So thank you for that .
Yeah, I think so too, and Ithink do that with anything that
comes up for you that you feelshameful or embarrassed or
uncomfortable with is to justreflect, go in and say this is
something that's gotten me towhere I am today and I never
used it in a harmful way.
It's always been productive andthis is how it's been
productive Always.
(38:52):
This is the other importantthing that I want to say always
do an accountability exercise ofall the things that have worked
for you in your life that havegotten you to where you are now,
Because that is that's soimportant.
Speaker 1 (39:07):
Look back, reflect.
Okay.
So the fifth question is do youhave a favorite book or
resource that changed how youthink?
Speaker 2 (39:14):
Well, I mentioned Abraham Hicks.
I love her work.
I listened to her probably atleast three to four times a week
.
Insight timer getting a coach,a good coach.
You can find someone that'sjust starting up that will work
with you financially.
If you're not in a position topay for one, they're out there.
(39:35):
Mine came at the time for meand I manifested I can't even
tell you, I would never tell youwhat I pay, but so much less
than what she charges everybodyelse, and I started that way
with her as she was beginning.
So call out whatever you need,journal it.
I want to coach and this is howmuch I can afford.
And I'm telling you you canfind them.
(39:57):
They're out there.
They want to build theircoaching practice and a lot of
times they're willing tonegotiate.
So maybe there's a barter, ormaybe if you do testimonials for
them or whatever it is, there'salways a way.
Or go through your insurance,if you have it, and get a
counselor, or both.
Speaker 1 (40:14):
Yeah, julie, this was an amazing conversation with
you.
I learned so much.
I'm so excited to take some ofthese things and incorporate
them into my life.
So thank you so much for beingon the show.
Speaker 2 (40:31):
And I'm just so thankful that you are here.
Thank you, I'm so excited foryou to be doing this project, to
be able to get these littletidbits of information out into
the world.
It's not just mine, I'm sureyou're going to have other
guests that are and what you say, you're so reflective, self
reflective as well, and justthat you're doing this.
It's so powerful.
Speaker 1 (40:47):
We're doing it.
Speaker 2 (40:53):
I can't wait.
So how will people hear aboutthis?
Like, how are people going to?
So I can help promote this andnot just mine, yours too.
Speaker 1 (41:03):
I actually want you to tell us how people can stay
in touch with you and follow you.
Speaker 2 (41:08):
Oh, okay, that's not what I asked, but okay, I just
remembered.
I'm like yeah, I'm on allsocial media and at Instagram
I'm the real Julie Kendall.
So that's Instagram Facebook, Ithink it's just Julie Kendall.
I have a couple of Facebookpages and TikTok.
I forget YouTube.
(41:29):
I do post quite a bit onYouTube as well, but it's Jules
Kendall, I believe J-U-L-E-S.
Kendall, and that's it.
Feel free to reach out onInstagram.
I'm a wellness coach too.
I do some private coaching.
I don't promote it a lot, but Ido some private coaching.
I love doing it.
Speaker 1 (41:47):
And they can catch your videos on YouTube.
Speaker 2 (41:49):
for that and Instagram, yeah, I do health
related videos on social media.
I put them on almost all theplatforms, all health related,
and a lot of times it's mentalhealth, but it's also physical
health.
I'm really all about teachingpeople how to be their best
selves from the inside out.
It's all about what you putinto your mind, into your body,
(42:13):
onto your body.
It all works together.
So my videos are really focusedon making sure people have
simple tidbits to help you beeternally youthful.
I believe in that, by the way,that you can be eternally
youthful.
Speaker 1 (42:25):
I believe in that, by the way, that you can be
eternally youthful.
Thanks so much for listening tothe Confidence Shortcut.
I hope today's episode wokesomething up in you, reminding
you that your dream matters andyou can start now.
If this sparked something,share it with a friend who needs
it too.
And don't forget to follow meon Instagram at Nikki Sterner
and join our Facebook communityat the Confidence Shortcut.
Ready to take the next step?
(42:45):
Check out my free guide, theConfidence Kickstart, linked in
the show notes.
Keep showing up, keep takingaction and remember the shortcut
to confidence is courage.
Welcome to the Confidence Shortcut, the podcast
for ambitious creatives andentrepreneurs who are ready to
stop overthinking, take boldaction and finally step into the
life they've been dreamingabout.
I'm your host, nikki Sterner.
Mom, actor, comedian andproducer.
After years of playing smalland waiting to feel ready, I
went on a courage quest andfound a shortcut to confidence.
(00:21):
Each week, I'll bring you realstories, simple steps and
conversations with experts inmindset courage and confidence,
plus heart-to-hearts with fellowcreatives who are turning their
dreams into reality.
It's time to get unstuck andstart showing up.
Let's dive in.
Welcome to the ConfidenceShortcut.
I'm Nikki Sterner, your host.
(00:42):
Today's guest is Julie Kendall,an award-winning actress and
former sales manager, whodiscovered her passion for
performing in the mostunexpected way through a public
speaking class meant to calm hernerves.
That one class changedeverything, leading her to leave
corporate life and fully pursuestorytelling.
You may recognize her fromTyler Perry's If Loving you Is
(01:02):
Wrong on OWN, cobra Kai onNetflix, the Singles Guidebook
on UP TV and the 2B thrillerSugar Mama.
Julie's not only a powerhouseon screen, but also a wellness
advocate and a globetrottingadventurer.
She's rappelled cliffs, gonewhitewater rafting and is always
chasing what lights her up.
I can't wait for you to hearabout her journey.
(01:23):
Welcome to the show, julieKendall.
Hello, so nice to have you here.
You're so much fun and you'rejust a wealth of knowledge,
especially for creatives andactives.
You're doing so much and so I'mjust so excited to get into
your story.
If you could just give us aquick snapshot, tell us a little
bit about who you are, what youdo and what you're passionate
(01:45):
about right now.
Speaker 2 (01:59):
Wow, okay, who I am inside of me that decided to say
yes and go for it and leftalmost everything you know that
I was comfortable with behind topursue it, and I guess I would
say that I'm an adventure seekerin every aspect of my life.
I was talking to a friend ofmine this morning and I was, you
(02:21):
know, talking to her about someof the questions that you had
written down there and Irealized that I've done some
pretty dramatic things thatpeople would say are dramatic in
my life, and not because I wastrying to stand out, but because
I just believe this is our oneshot in this body.
Why not go for it as far as youpossibly can, and what's the
(02:42):
worst that can happen?
So I would say that I'm a lover.
I do as much as I can to loveas much as I can and to love
myself, to love the world, tolove the people in the world and
to love the life that I create.
So that's it.
Speaker 1 (03:00):
You know, and that that is totally the aura that
you put off every time I've beenin your presence is this aura
of love and connection, and youdo a really nice job of making
people feel loved and welcomedaround you.
That's just one of your gifts.
That's a beautiful thing.
Speaker 2 (03:15):
Tell me what you're working on for acting right now
been on a really cool showthat's actually on social media.
There's this whole new wave ofproduction that began a few
years ago called VerticalFilming, and at first I was like
, huh, I don't know about this.
But then, you know, theopportunity came up.
(03:36):
It was miraculous how it cameup and I just said yes to it,
which I often do, because younever know, and I love it so
much.
I just want to continue, and Ilove being on set.
It's called Country Wayne andthat's with a K, k-o-u-n-t-r-y
Wayne, and it's on Facebook,tiktok and YouTube and it's
(04:00):
basically mini soap operas.
They're three-minute-longepisodes and they're all soap
operas.
They're three minute longepisodes and they're all soap
operas and it's so much fun Ican't even explain it.
So that's been fantastic.
He does very, very well.
This guy, country Wayne,started it I want to say maybe
like 2017, ish and he just threwit to the wall.
(04:22):
He's a filmmaker and thingswere not going positively
between COVID and the strike.
It was really difficult to findwork.
So he said I'm just going to dothis myself, which a lot of
people are doing now, and Icommend them for it.
I think it's really amazing howpeople just don't sit in pity
they just say, yes, I'm going totry something new and see what
(04:43):
works.
And he tried this and it's beenso successful.
On Facebook he has, I think,9.6 million followers, so that's
amazing.
My character I go by Julie andshe's a Southern woman.
She's very wealthy, self-made.
A little bit was received froma divorce, so she's a little bit
(05:05):
of a shyster.
She's very manipulative andcontrolling and people are
catching on to her manipulation,but it's nonstop surprises,
which is so much fun.
And, by the way, it's allimprovised, 100% improvised.
There's no script.
We are told different thingsthat need to be brought out in
(05:26):
the scene and different emotions, but everything is 100%
improvised.
So, wow, what an experience.
Talk about confidence booster,that is, try improvising a show
or any, you know, because you dostand up and improvise as well.
So you know, but doingimprovisation with drama is also
(05:47):
really cool.
It's just so cool.
I love it.
I love it.
So, yeah, talk about growth onthe spot.
Speaker 1 (05:55):
Think of what to say.
I would love to do that.
I mean just to have ideas andjust start recording, and it's
obviously a professional setup.
They've got all the lighting,or how far do they take it with
the vertical filming?
Speaker 2 (06:09):
Well, here's the thing that is so amazing with
this project.
I think with other verticalprojects it's a little bit more
elaborate.
With this it's a little bit oflighting, very little, no extra
sound.
It's on a cell phone and verylittle, little to no editing.
So it is, yeah, it's justfilmed Basically.
(06:32):
There's no cutaways, so it'sjust going back and forth in
between each person and if it'sa good cinematographer they are
able to capture whatever it isthey need to capture.
But it's really amazing.
The quality is beautiful.
You wouldn't even know that itshot on a cell phone.
You wouldn't know that there'sno extra sound.
(06:54):
And then I just booked something.
I'm so super excited.
It's shooting in Shreveport,louisiana, and I tell you, you
just never know what's going tohappen.
So I got a message saying I wasbooked and it's like a low
budget SAG film short film andshooting in Shreveport.
(07:16):
They reached out and said we'reconsidering you for the role.
How would you feel about comingto Shreveport, traveling here?
And so I wrote back and I said,wow, honored, so honored, and
love traveling for work.
It's one of my favorite thingswhen I get to shoot out of town.
It's like I just I can'texplain what it does to me.
It just lights me up so much.
(07:36):
And I said if you have a travelbudget, let me know I'll be
there.
And so I thought, okay, I'mreally putting a lot on them,
travel budget, short filmUsually they want local hire.
Only Lo and behold a few dayslater.
How would you feel about flyingin doing this?
Blah, blah, blah, we got aplace, a house, we have a room
(07:57):
for you.
How would you feel about it?
And I was like book me and so,yay, congratulations.
You got to put yourself outthere, really and just trust it.
And if it didn't work out, atleast I advocated for myself.
Speaker 1 (08:14):
Yeah, you asked for what you wanted.
What a powerful feeling.
Speaker 2 (08:19):
Amazing, Amazing.
It was so powerful.
Not just booking it.
Booking it was amazing.
It was so powerful, not justbooking it booking, it was
amazing Booking it being able toshoot out of town.
Even more amazing thanadvocating for myself and just
putting myself out there andtrusting it, and then it coming
through.
Wow, you can't have a betterfeeling than that.
Speaker 1 (08:39):
You know that is self-care.
I love that because you had theconfidence to ask for what you
needed, instead of a lot oftimes we back away like, oh, I
probably I shouldn't ask, Ishouldn't ask for that, I'm
asking for too much for myself,versus realizing your worth and
asking for it and receiving it.
That's so powerful and that'sso confident.
I love that.
Speaker 2 (08:59):
And it could have gone in the other direction.
But I have to take the gamblebecause if that didn't work out,
something else will come along,and that's the other thing that
has taken so long to realize,and I really want to impart that
to the people that watch this.
We put so much on everything wedo and we have to just do it,
(09:20):
let it go and trust it.
If it doesn't happen, there's areason.
We can't try to even figure outwhat that reason is, but we
have to let it go and just knowthat something else will come
along.
We just can't.
We can't hold on holding on.
All it does is hurt us.
It doesn't hurt anybody else,it hurts us.
And I always say this to mybest friend when he complains
(09:44):
about stuff.
I always say to him why are yousaying that to my best friend?
Why are you talking to my bestfriend that way?
Because self-talk.
Oh my gosh.
We beat ourselves up so much,we put so much pressure on
ourselves.
We bulge this rampage ofnegative thoughts.
We've got to stop doing that,because we got to take better
(10:08):
care of ourselves.
Speaker 1 (10:10):
Do you have those thoughts that come up and what
do you do to quiet them or dealwith them?
Speaker 2 (10:16):
Yeah, I do as much as I possibly can every single day
to strengthen my mind, justlike we go to the gym and work
on our bodies, just like we eat.
Really well our minds, we havechoices and we have to stop
ourselves mid-sentence and sayis this the truth?
Is that the truth or is thereanother option?
(10:39):
Because it's partly a lazy mind, it's a pre-programmed mind,
it's a habit that we're used to.
But we can change that.
We have the power to change ourthoughts.
And boy, I tell you, it is asimple process but it takes.
Just like going to the gym.
You don't see the results unlessyou work on it daily.
(11:01):
You know like if you go to thegym, you're not gonna see your
body change overnight.
It's gonna take three months,six months a year to really see
vast differences in your body.
Same thing with your mind.
You have to really be aware andcatch those thoughts.
As soon as you start to feellike, ooh, that doesn't feel
(11:22):
good, you have to recognize it.
That doesn't feel good.
When I say that or when I thinkthat that thought does not feel
good, what can I do to replaceit?
And don't get me wrong, I fallinto the cracks a lot and I have
to stop myself sometimes.
I had some things that come upthis weekend and I fell into the
cracks and it took me reachingout to somebody that I worked
(11:46):
with for many years and I stillcontinue to work with her.
She's a spiritual coach, a lifecoach, so I text her a lot and
I just say this is what happened, this is what I'm going through
, any suggestions, and thenshe'll usually send me a video
from someone like Abraham Hicks.
I don't know if you've heard ofher or not, but she's a
renowned spiritual motivationalspeaker Amazing.
(12:07):
She usually will send me avideo and she'll be like oh gosh
, that's so funny.
I just heard a video thismorning and it's kind of on the
subject of what you're talkingabout here it is.
So she'll send it to me andI'll listen to that.
And then I'll do my meditationwork and I do a ritual and I
write in my journal and, beforeyou know it, I've worked my way
through back to those stablethoughts, those positive
(12:31):
thoughts.
I'm hesitant to use the wordpositive Because people always
think that's hokey.
You know they're like oh, comeon whatever.
But I'll just say that it's amore self loving thought.
Speaker 1 (12:45):
Do you write in your journal, Julie, like every
morning?
Can you tell us what you gothrough?
Speaker 2 (12:50):
Yes, it's a little different every day, but for the
most part I write as if the dayhas already happened.
So I write as if it's 10o'clock at night and I'm
reflecting on day, and I writeit exactly how I would have
wanted that day to be.
And as I'm writing it, I startfeeling all the things that I'm
(13:14):
writing about.
It's almost like a child that'sdaydreaming.
Or you know how we played whenwe were younger.
It's almost like that.
So when I'm writing it, I'mwriting it exactly how I would
have wanted it to go, and Istart feeling the excitement
(13:35):
Like, for example, I'll saytoday was so magical.
I went to work and everybodysmiled at me today and that's
because I made sure that I feltso excited everywhere that I
went.
People complimented me, peopleinteracted with me in fun and
exciting ways.
(13:56):
My job even though it's amundane job.
I envisioned that I was the CEOof the company and that I was
just going out and helping tomake sure that my accounts are
satisfied and that my reps aredoing a great job, and I sang
through the day.
The sun was shining.
Those are just a few of thethings I ate amazing, so my body
feels great.
(14:16):
I took some time to work out.
Even though I didn't have a lotof time today for extra
activity, I made sure that I didsome ab work and some core work
and some balance work and boy,it was such a beautiful day.
My heart is full and I feel solucky and blessed and things
like that.
I'll sometimes go a little bitfurther and talk about if I have
(14:37):
an audition that day.
I'll talk about how theaudition went, how I breathed
into it and felt so good aboutmy work and you know, blah, blah
, blah.
I just do things like that andI write that and by the time I
get to my journal, I've alreadydone my meditation.
I've done a little ritual thatI do each day with a candle
lighting and talking with ahigher power, and then I stop
(15:00):
and write in my journal andafter I'm done with all of that,
I feel like I literally won thelottery.
It just feels so good.
It totally shifts everything.
Most people would say that'sexcessive.
But is it really?
If it's something that reallyworks and makes you feel good,
(15:21):
is that excessive?
I don't think so.
I think not doing it is missingout.
I think you're missing out onall the great nuggets that
potentially come your waybecause you feel so differently,
because we're energy, right orenergy, and I will tell you that
since I started doing all thisbetween my meditation, the
(15:43):
candle lighting and thejournaling and then I do
affirmations as well, throughoutthe day, a lot of times as well
but since I've been doing that,I've had one of my best years
as an actor and financially,last year that I've had in a
long time in this year has beenamazing.
Speaker 1 (16:00):
So I created the confidence kickstart morning
routine because I know what it'slike to have big dreams and
still feel stuck behindself-doubt, fear or the pressure
to get it right.
As an actor, comedian and awardwinning filmmaker, I've been on
over 50 stages, but confidencedidn't come first.
Action and habits did.
This free guide gives you theexact 15-minute routine I use
(16:23):
every morning, with journalprompts, a guided audio
meditation and a simplestep-by-step process built on
the three pillars of theConfident Shortcut Mindset, path
and Action.
These aren't just feel-goodideas.
They're habits that work, thatbuild confidence, that move you
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If you're ready to stopoverthinking and start showing
up the link is in the caption Gograb it and start your day with
(16:45):
clarity, courage and realmomentum.
Wow, that is absolutelyincredible.
I'm curious, julie how longdoes this take you in the
morning?
Is this like an hour routine?
Speaker 2 (17:00):
So in bed I listen to a guided meditation, and if I
have more time that morning, ifI wake up early enough or I have
more time, I'll listen to alonger one.
If not, I just listen to itlike a five to six minute one.
Speaker 1 (17:15):
Where do you get those?
Speaker 2 (17:16):
On Insight Timer.
I love Insight Timer.
There are a number of ones outthere.
Yeah, that I was led to andI've been using it for probably
10 years now.
Love it, wow, yeah, I love it.
You can get it for free, whichis amazing.
And what's even more amazing isthat they send you a plethora
(17:38):
of choices and you get to decidewhich one you want to listen to
, depending on how long, whatyou want to work on, what you
feel called to.
Sometimes I listen to abundance, sometimes I listen to
financials, sometimes I listento letting go, some surrendering
.
You know, it just depends on Ifeel like I need that morning or
that night.
(17:58):
I listened to it twice a day,actually, before I go to sleep.
I fell asleep to an timermeditation as well, and then
also I, throughout the day, likewhen I'm getting ready, I'll
oftentimes listen to an AbrahamHicks segment as well, and I get
those on YouTube.
They're free, so I'll do thatwhen I'm in the shower or when
I'm getting ready, I'll listento them as well, cause those are
(18:21):
amazing reminders too.
But no, the actual ritual thatI do between meditating,
stretching because I stretchevery morning while I'm in bed
as well, because I want to.
I stretch and then I tap mybody to like kind of get my
circulation.
I kick my legs.
I want to get my circulationgoing, my heart pumping, right
(18:42):
in bed.
I do that, I listen to mymeditation, I do my stretching,
I do my stimulation and then Iget up and I do my candle
lighting and my journaling and Iwant to say maybe a half hour.
Speaker 1 (18:55):
Can you tell me about the candle lighting?
I'm curious because I havenever done that other than to do
a burning ritual ceremony thingto get rid of past beliefs that
weren't serving me.
But I've never heard of oneevery morning.
I'm curious.
Tell me about that please.
Speaker 2 (19:09):
So it was suggested for me to do and it was very
specific how somebody suggestedit and I've made it my own.
So I'm going to give you my waythat I'm doing it, but there is
no right way or wrong way.
It's really feeling into it.
So I have a candelabra Is thatwhat it's called?
It's like a candlestick, one ofthe tall ones, tall, thin ones,
(19:29):
and that's what was suggestedfor me, and I have it in a
candle holder and I just in myliving room it's quiet, I light
the candle and I actually justget quiet for a minute and I
talk out loud about somethingthat I want answers to,
something that I feel like Iwant to address.
(19:53):
For example, this morning I hadremnants of kind of some
challenge I had over the weekend.
I woke up with feeling a littlebit ambivalent, like a little
off center.
So I call it the universe, callit whatever you want.
Source God.
However, you refer to yourhigher power.
So I basically just sayuniverse.
(20:17):
I really want to talk to youabout how I'm feeling this
morning and I want some clarityabout why I'm feeling this way.
This is what I'm feeling.
Can you give me some clarity?
And I'll sit still for a minuteand then I'll hear higher than
myself.
A lot of people say it's yourhigher self, some people say
it's God.
I'm open to whatever it is thatis greater than me.
(20:38):
It could be, like I said, myhigher self, it could be the
universe talking to me, godtalking to me, but basically I
will hear.
Well, julie, I'm so glad youasked me that, because this is
my perspective on this.
This is what I see.
What do you think of that?
And I'll just have aconversation.
And before I know it, it's soamazing because I will get
(21:00):
clearer perspective than I everhave just by to what source is
sharing with me.
And we all have the answersinside.
This is the.
We all have the answers.
And if we don't have theminside us, we have access to
them.
We have the answers if we juststop and get it and allow them
(21:21):
to come through for us.
So, basically, those answerscome through for me and then, a
lot of times, my higher powerwill say write in your journal
right now, write about this.
Or, after I'm done gettingwhatever information I need,
I'll snuff out my candle.
I never blow it out, I snuff itout.
That's what I was doing.
Speaker 1 (21:41):
What does that mean?
Speaker 2 (21:42):
I use a little thing to put it out instead of blowing
it out.
From what I understand, myfriend that shared this ritual
with me said don't ever blow thecandle out, and I don't
remember what the reason was,but this is my interpretation.
There is no right way or wrongway.
I'm sure if you blow the candleout you're not going to jinx
anything or ruin everything, butfrom a ritualistic perspective,
(22:04):
for habit I just snuff it outwith a little glass thing you
can use like a metal thing justto put it out.
I always feel fulfilled becauseI've gotten information that I
needed to hear.
And then when I startjournaling a lot of times I
mentioned that I write about myday, but it includes what I
(22:24):
learned in there the universe orsource will say to me write
down what it is that you want meto work on for you.
When I do that as well, almostalways things happen, like
almost immediately.
Money shows up, a bookinghappens, something happens, it's
just amazing.
Somebody reaches out to me, anopportunity shows up something,
(22:48):
so it's just amazing.
Somebody reaches out to me, anopportunity shows up something,
so it's very powerful.
A written word is so powerful.
And then these conversationswith source, so powerful.
But, more importantly, theself-reflection is just
unbelievable, and this helpsstrengthen the mind.
(23:10):
Back to what we were talkingabout before, allowing me to get
in with making a differentchoice instead of just falling
into that old habit, that oldchoice that I felt comfortable,
comfortably uncomfortable in.
We're all human.
(23:31):
We all have that happen, andthis does not happen overnight.
I went through 11 years ofworking on and off with a
spiritual coach.
I've gone to counseling.
I believe in counseling whenyou need it.
I believe in whatever practiceyou do.
Some people pray, some peoplebelieve in doing that daily.
(23:54):
I believe whatever it is thatgrounds you allows you to
communicate with somethinggreater than yourself.
And meditating are soincredibly important because it
strengthens the mind.
Speaker 1 (24:11):
I took so much out of this conversation.
This is so powerful, thisroutine that you have every
morning and you said you dosomething at night as well
Listen to a guided audio.
I do the same thing.
I think it's super helpful,Like you said, resetting in the
morning and at night so thatwhen you're asleep, your brain
is also thinking thoughts thatyou want and working on
(24:32):
something that you might needhelp with.
I can't tell you how much theconversation with the universe.
That is probably the main thingI'm going to take away, because
I don't do that right now.
I know that I probably should,but that's something that's
missing is that quietconversation and then listen.
(24:53):
I feel like I'm a little busyright now doing instead of
stopping and listening, and Ilove the candle part of it
because that is like an activesomething that you can do and
gives me focus, and there's anenergy, a warmth to that,
something about fire.
I don't know what it is.
Maybe you could tell us what itis about the fire that brings
(25:16):
the attention and the energyright there.
Speaker 2 (25:20):
You know I'm not a hundred percent sure, but I will
tell you that and I meant tosay this before.
Thank you for reminding me,because everything you just said
kind of reminded me, it broughtit together.
I was visualizing the wholething and then I realized I
actually talked to the candle.
The universe to me is the flame, the flame.
(25:42):
The universe is the flame or thesource, god, whatever is the
flame, and I oftentimes will seemovement in the flame, even
though there's nothing in theroom that's moving, and it's
just a reminder that somethingis there listening to me, with
me, and sometimes the flame getsbigger, sometimes it gets
(26:03):
smaller, Sometimes it moves,sometimes it just does so many
things and it's just areiteration to me that there's
something greater than me inthis flame.
For me it just insinuates thegreater power, because fire,
it's a power.
So for me the significance isit is the universe in a form, in
(26:29):
some type of form, because itis like a lit up, bright,
effervescent power.
Yeah, that's very great.
Speaker 1 (26:40):
That's a great description, thank you.
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(27:01):
system, the part of the brainresponsible for fear, fight or
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If this speaks to you, clickthe link in the caption.
It might be the answer you'relooking for.
Okay, we're going to go intothe confidence quickfire round
(27:21):
now I have five questions.
I'd love to ask you.
Speaker 2 (27:24):
Sure.
Speaker 1 (27:25):
Okay.
So as a creative artist,working actor, I want to know
for you how do you defineconfidence?
Speaker 2 (27:37):
I think confidence is surrender, surrender.
I think when we let go andallow our authentic self to come
through, we are really our bestselves, our best and brightest
(28:05):
selves.
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (28:09):
That's beautiful Surrender.
I love that.
Speaker 2 (28:11):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (28:13):
That's so true, Like when we cannot put on the facade
and just be.
That is true confidence.
Speaker 2 (28:20):
Raw.
I do my best auditions, when Ijust let go, I just let go my
best work.
I see, when I'm in my head,when I'm thinking about the
lines, when I'm not comfortablewith the material, whatever it
is, I see that I have notsurrendered and I'm just trying
to do something.
(28:41):
Trying and it's surrendering,not trying Just being.
Speaker 1 (28:48):
That's so good, that's so helpful.
Speaker 2 (28:50):
Yeah, true, yeah, and that takes work too.
That's part of the formula withthis whole ritual and
journaling and talking with theuniverse and this whole state of
mind.
It comes with allowing yourselfto surrender because, yeah,
confidence in letting go is ittakes confidence to let go.
Speaker 1 (29:15):
That's beautiful, yeah, okay, here's my second
question for you, julie.
What's one bold move that youmade before you felt ready?
Speaker 2 (29:24):
Moving to Atlanta from South Florida.
Yeah, I went through a divorceand an opportunity came up to
stay in someone's house inGeorgia and somebody that I knew
from the films, fromauditioning and being in her
(29:45):
films two of her films and shehad a house here and I think
three of us moved in with her in2014.
I said yes, the opportunitycame up and I was trying to
figure out what to do with mylife and I just said yes and I
literally packed up whatever Icould in my car, left all my
furniture, except for somenightstands I think that was the
(30:08):
only furniture I took andbedding, but no furniture.
I just left everything behindand put one of those things on
top of my roof and crossed intoGeorgia and started my new life.
Wow, and that was almost 11years ago.
So I wasn't like young I'm notsaying I'm old, but I wasn't
(30:31):
like in my twenties and moved inwith four of us in this house,
four ladies, and I let go of mycomfort zone all around me and
just stepped into it and had noidea what I was going to get
myself into.
But I said yes and, by the way,from letting go and saying yes
(30:57):
and just trusting.
Everything came together for me.
It was amazing.
A job showed up for me from anemployer that I worked for, had
worked for 20 years before that.
They followed me on.
I posted a picture as I crossedover into the state of Georgia
Welcome to Georgia.
And I wrote my new home.
(31:17):
And she, the owner of thecompany, saw my post and said
why are you moving to Georgia?
And I hadn't talked to her forlike 10 years.
And she said why are you movingto Georgia?
And I said how did you know I'mmoving to Georgia?
She said I've been followingyour acting career on Facebook.
And I said oh my gosh.
And I told her I'm changing mylife, I'm pursuing my dreams.
And she said do you need a job?
(31:38):
And I said I do.
And she said I don't know ifthere's any openings in Georgia,
but I'm going to speak with thesales manager and we'll see
what we can come up with.
And they created a job for me.
Speaker 1 (31:48):
You still have, or was that a different one?
Speaker 2 (31:50):
It is yeah, so I still.
I'm still there 11 years later.
Yeah, I'm still there part-time, and you love that job.
I do.
It's, yeah, it's that I lovethat job.
(32:20):
I like the job, it pays mybills and it allows me freedom
and flexibility.
It is if I could have writtendown what I would want and just
say universe, god, higher power,take care of me.
It happens, I'm not kidding.
Speaker 1 (32:36):
I love that so powerful You're such a powerful
manifester.
It's amazing.
I think you've covered this,but I'm just going to ask it and
you can briefly talk about ithow do you quiet your inner
critic?
Speaker 2 (32:48):
oh yeah, we did talk about that meditation candle
ritual, journaling, meditatingtwice a day, affirmations,
speaking with either a counselor, a really good counselor, or an
amazing life coach, or both.
My life coach is wow.
She's one of the most I'm goingto use the word delicious
(33:10):
individuals I've ever met.
Wow, she's a major manifesterand just got the most beautiful
heart of anyone.
She is my mentor, my dearfriend.
Speaker 1 (33:21):
Okay, and what's one habit that helped you build real
confidence?
I don't know if that's going tobe the routine that you do
every morning or if there'ssomething else that's a habit
that you do for confidence.
Speaker 2 (33:33):
All of that and saying yes, and just saying yes,
and not letting fear stop me.
Speaker 1 (33:41):
Did?
You used to have a lot of fearDid you used to have a lot of
fear.
Speaker 2 (33:47):
Yes, and I don't know how to say this quickly, but I
attended a seminar, or a retreat, I should say, with Elizabeth
Gilbert last year.
I don't know if you know whoshe is.
She wrote E, pray, love, yeah,and oh my God, if I can tell you
how I was able to attend this,it was amazing.
I got to go for free.
It was amazing, I manifested itwas amazing.
(34:09):
I got to go for free.
It was amazing, I manifested it.
It came to me, I manifested itand I worked it out so that I
was able to go for free.
I'm not joking, it was an 800plus.
Yeah, yeah, I was able to gofor free.
So, anyway, one of the thingsthat I love that she talked
about was about fear, and shesaid fear never goes away.
(34:31):
It's always there.
She said what she has learnedto do is she has learned to take
fear out of the front seat ofher car and put it in the back
seat.
She's had a conversation withfear and she says she said
something like this.
I'm not quoting her, but shesays fear.
I see you, I know you are in mylife for an incredibly
(34:54):
important reason and I thank youfor all of the things that you
have helped me to navigate in mylife.
You've brought me to where I amtoday and I know that if you
were not there, I would not bethis person.
But I don't need you in thefront seat anymore.
I'm not kicking you out of mylife.
I know I need you, but I'mputting you in the back seat and
(35:17):
I'm letting I think she saidmaybe confidence or whatever
else sit in the front seat.
You can sit in the back seatand I'm only allowing you to
talk to me when I ask you.
You are not allowed to sayanything unless I ask you.
And I was like, wow, so I dothat a lot in my ritual, I do
(35:41):
that a lot in my journal.
In my ritual, I talk todifferent parts of me.
I do that a lot of my journaland my ritual.
I talk to different parts of me.
I really try to identify, likeI have.
I'm going to say this is a veryvulnerable thing for me to say
and I'm going to say it becauseI feel like it needs to be said,
because there are so manypeople that don't talk about
this.
But jealousy, we all havejealousy.
We all look at someone else andgo why did she get that, or why
(36:05):
did he get that, or what did heget that, or why did they have
this much money, or why does youknow?
Why am I not?
We all have that.
And for a long time I judgedmyself for that and I had a
conversation with the universeand the universe basically said
it's gotten you to where you aretoday if you did not that.
(36:25):
And then it also asked me if Iever hurt anyone or did anything
hurtful, intentionally hurtful,with jealousy as a part of me
that was active and I never didanything hurtful.
So the universe said to me okay, now do you see how it was
healthy for you and how it gotyou to where you are today?
(36:45):
And I said now do you see howit was healthy for you and how
it got you to where you aretoday?
And I said I do, because Ijudged myself.
I was even afraid to say it.
I was afraid to say it out loud.
I realized, through aconversation with my coach and
then the universe, that it'sgotten me to where I am today,
but it was never used in amalicious or harmful way.
Speaker 1 (37:08):
Wow, that's a huge aha moment.
Speaker 2 (37:11):
So part of my ritual that I do is I talk about
different things that are taboo,that even we don't even want to
talk to ourselves about becausewe don't want to admit like, oh
, I'm jealous, I'm a jealousperson, but it's not in a
harmful way.
If I did something like reallyhurtful or harmful, that's a
different story, but even thenthat's where I was then.
(37:34):
Do you know what I'm saying?
I'm not that way anymore.
If I did so, even if you did dosomething, forgive yourself.
You're only human.
We're human.
We make errors.
We do things from where we arein that time in our lives.
Speaker 1 (37:48):
But anyway, I've heard Julie to use jealousy in a
positive way, like it istelling you what you actually
want, and so that's like aguidepost.
Oh, okay, that's letting meknow that it's possible.
Number one, they have it, I canhave it too.
And number two, that it'simportant to me to do that thing
, whatever it is that you'rejealous of.
So it sounds like maybe that'spushed you in that direction,
(38:08):
like to know what you want.
And the fact that you said Ithink we all have judged
ourselves or felt ashamed forbeing jealous or using it, but
the fact that you reflected backon it oh no, I haven't really
done it in a harmful way or useit in a harmful way that's
really a great lesson and agreat thing for us to take away
(38:29):
as listeners right now to thisconversation.
Speaker 2 (38:31):
So thank you for that .
Yeah, I think so too, and Ithink do that with anything that
comes up for you that you feelshameful or embarrassed or
uncomfortable with is to justreflect, go in and say this is
something that's gotten me towhere I am today and I never
used it in a harmful way.
It's always been productive andthis is how it's been
productive Always.
(38:52):
This is the other importantthing that I want to say always
do an accountability exercise ofall the things that have worked
for you in your life that havegotten you to where you are now,
Because that is that's soimportant.
Speaker 1 (39:07):
Look back, reflect.
Okay.
So the fifth question is do youhave a favorite book or
resource that changed how youthink?
Speaker 2 (39:14):
Well, I mentioned Abraham Hicks.
I love her work.
I listened to her probably atleast three to four times a week
.
Insight timer getting a coach,a good coach.
You can find someone that'sjust starting up that will work
with you financially.
If you're not in a position topay for one, they're out there.
(39:35):
Mine came at the time for meand I manifested I can't even
tell you, I would never tell youwhat I pay, but so much less
than what she charges everybodyelse, and I started that way
with her as she was beginning.
So call out whatever you need,journal it.
I want to coach and this is howmuch I can afford.
And I'm telling you you canfind them.
(39:57):
They're out there.
They want to build theircoaching practice and a lot of
times they're willing tonegotiate.
So maybe there's a barter, ormaybe if you do testimonials for
them or whatever it is, there'salways a way.
Or go through your insurance,if you have it, and get a
counselor, or both.
Speaker 1 (40:14):
Yeah, julie, this was an amazing conversation with
you.
I learned so much.
I'm so excited to take some ofthese things and incorporate
them into my life.
So thank you so much for beingon the show.
Speaker 2 (40:31):
And I'm just so thankful that you are here.
Thank you, I'm so excited foryou to be doing this project, to
be able to get these littletidbits of information out into
the world.
It's not just mine, I'm sureyou're going to have other
guests that are and what you say, you're so reflective, self
reflective as well, and justthat you're doing this.
It's so powerful.
Speaker 1 (40:47):
We're doing it.
Speaker 2 (40:53):
I can't wait.
So how will people hear aboutthis?
Like, how are people going to?
So I can help promote this andnot just mine, yours too.
Speaker 1 (41:03):
I actually want you to tell us how people can stay
in touch with you and follow you.
Speaker 2 (41:08):
Oh, okay, that's not what I asked, but okay, I just
remembered.
I'm like yeah, I'm on allsocial media and at Instagram
I'm the real Julie Kendall.
So that's Instagram Facebook, Ithink it's just Julie Kendall.
I have a couple of Facebookpages and TikTok.
I forget YouTube.
(41:29):
I do post quite a bit onYouTube as well, but it's Jules
Kendall, I believe J-U-L-E-S.
Kendall, and that's it.
Feel free to reach out onInstagram.
I'm a wellness coach too.
I do some private coaching.
I don't promote it a lot, but Ido some private coaching.
I love doing it.
Speaker 1 (41:47):
And they can catch your videos on YouTube.
Speaker 2 (41:49):
for that and Instagram, yeah, I do health
related videos on social media.
I put them on almost all theplatforms, all health related,
and a lot of times it's mentalhealth, but it's also physical
health.
I'm really all about teachingpeople how to be their best
selves from the inside out.
It's all about what you putinto your mind, into your body,
(42:13):
onto your body.
It all works together.
So my videos are really focusedon making sure people have
simple tidbits to help you beeternally youthful.
I believe in that, by the way,that you can be eternally
youthful.
Speaker 1 (42:25):
I believe in that, by the way, that you can be
eternally youthful.
Thanks so much for listening tothe Confidence Shortcut.
I hope today's episode wokesomething up in you, reminding
you that your dream matters andyou can start now.
If this sparked something,share it with a friend who needs
it too.
And don't forget to follow meon Instagram at Nikki Sterner
and join our Facebook communityat the Confidence Shortcut.
Ready to take the next step?
(42:45):
Check out my free guide, theConfidence Kickstart, linked in
the show notes.
Keep showing up, keep takingaction and remember the shortcut
to confidence is courage.
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