June 3, 2025 • 31 mins
What if the bravest thing you could do today wasn’t skydiving—but telling the truth about what you want next? In this deeply honest and wildly soulful episode, Erica and Rusty explore what it means to live with courage—not just in crisis, but in the quiet, daily moments that define us. From a canoe in Saigon Bay to the freedom of letting go, this episode is a love letter to brave living in the second half of life. If you’ve been waiting for a sign—this is it.
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(00:00):
Picture this. You're standing at the edge of a
small tropical island, barefoot in the sand.
A salty. Breeze brushing your cheeks and
the rhythmic. Tap.
Of palm leaves whispering secrets.
Above you. You've got a canoe tied up at.
The dock. The water is calm.
But it's wide. Beyond.
(00:21):
You is the safety. Of a hammock and a.
Chilled drink ahead of you. There's.
Possibility. Mystery.
The kind. Of mourning where the horizon
feels like an invitation. You could stay put.
You've survived storms, buried anchors, and learned a thing or
two about the tides. It's something in you stirs.
(00:43):
It's not about being restless. It's about remembering you're
still meant to move, to paddle, to risk.
Because courage in this season of life isn't about chasing
thrills. It's about honoring the part of
you that refuses to go dormant. Welcome to The Latitude
(01:05):
Adjustment, an aging heroes podcast where midlife isn't a
crisis, it's a call to adventurehosted by Randolph and Erica
Harrison. This is your unapologetic
permission slip to live bold, barefoot, and wildly beyond the
script. Randolph is a Gallup certified
strengths coach and award-winning college educator
who believes the second-half of life is where the real story
(01:25):
begins. Erica is a globetrotting
Wellness guide and union life coach who once ran the Mount
Kilimanjaro Marathon. Because of course she did.
Together, they're here to help you bust myths about aging,
share fierce stories of transformation, and challenge
you to rise, rewire, and reclaimyour own wild path forward.
So kick off your shoes or something strong.
This isn't just a podcast, it's a movement.
(01:47):
Your day one starts now. Welcome Amigos, you're listening
to the. Latitude adjustment.
I'm Erica. And I'm rusty.
Hey, Rusty. And today, we're cracking open
one of our favorite chapters from A Guide for Aging Heroes
Day 5. Live courageously.
(02:09):
This isn't about skydiving or going off grid.
It's about those moments when fear doesn't show up with fangs.
It shows up wearing khakis. It's saying something like maybe
next year or you've missed your.Shot.
Right. It's not the monster under the
bed, it's the voice saying you're too old, you're too
tired, or even just play it safe.
(02:32):
So. Today we want to take you to a
small island. It's Isla Cologne in Panama.
There's a little Bay. There called Saigon Bay.
Bocas del Toro. And one Tuesday morning, we
witnessed something that stoppedus in our tracks.
It was an elderly Indigenous manand his grandson paddling A
(02:54):
dugout canoe across the water. No motor, no music.
Just wood, water and willpower. The rain was pouring down.
The canoe was filled with fruits, fish and vegetables
they'd harvested or traded the day before their route.
House to house, water to doorstep.
Yeah. Selling to families who live in
(03:16):
over the water homes. It was the.
Coolest thing I remember standing in our open air
kitchen. I had my coffee in hand, the
rain that was just showering down over the mangroves.
You could still hear every dip of that.
Hand carved. Paddle like a heartbeat.
No rush, just presents. I thought to myself, this is
(03:39):
courage. Not loud, not flashy, but
consistent and purposeful. Purposeful.
Yes. That elderly man could have
stopped years ago. Sure.
But there he was, teaching his grandson how to live with his
hands, his back, and his honor. Even when the wind picked up,
even when the rain hammered down, he didn't turn back.
(04:01):
He just adjusted his. Stroke and that's.
What bravery looks. Like when it ceased.
Not dramatic, just steady. So let's pause for a quick
teaching moment. I love a teaching.
Moment from a teacher. All right, so here's what we
know from psychology. Fear isn't a weakness, it's a
signal. It lives in the amygdala, that
tiny almond shaped part of your brain wired for survival.
(04:25):
It's trying to protect you from danger.
But here's the twist. Your brain doesn't know the
difference between an angry bearand a uncomfortable e-mail.
Brain. It can't differentiate between a
real threat and emotional vulnerability.
And that's where courage comes in.
It's not about shutting fear down.
(04:46):
It's about moving forward. While fear rides shotgun.
Exactly. Courage activates a different
part of the brain, the prefrontal cortex.
That's the seat of decision making and meaning.
So when you take a step towards something that matters, even
while you're scared, your brain begins to to rewire.
(05:07):
You're literally training yourself to become braver.
Note to self operate from my prefrontal cortex, so if you
feel. Fear.
It means you're. Alive.
And if you act anyway, that's courage and motion.
(05:27):
It reminded me, living courageously doesn't mean you
aren't scared, It means you keepshowing up anyway.
That's so important. Important.
And not just for the big dreams,for the small ones too.
The everyday ones that make yourlife more yours.
Maybe for you it's. Going to be picking up the
(05:48):
guitar again or calling someone you haven't spoken to since the
world turned upside down. Maybe it's starting therapy or
ending a relationship or tellingthe.
Truth about what you. Really want next.
Maybe it's putting your name in the hat for something that
lights your soul on fire, even if you're not sure you'll get
(06:12):
picked. Courage doesn't always.
Roar. Sometimes it's.
Just a quiet shaky yes. To your own damn life.
We've had to find our way back to courage, too.
Once or twice or 10 times. There were times we stalled out,
got stuck in roles or routines that felt more like cages than
(06:34):
calling. Absolutely.
And it didn't take a crisis to shift it, just a whisper of
dissatisfaction. And when we.
Followed that. Whisper even with uncertainty.
Life cracked. Open.
The map got blurry. But the wind, oh, it came back,
and with it, forward movement. Look, we're not saying this is
(06:58):
easy, but what's the alternative?
Numbness. Regret watching someone else
live the life that once had yourname on it.
No, that's not you. You're not done.
You're not irrelevant. You're not out of time.
Aging Heroes challenge #1 Think of something you let go of, not
(07:21):
because it stopped mattering, but because fear got too loud.
A dream, a practice, a version of yourself.
Now ask, is it time to try again?
And don't overthink it. Don't wait until you're.
Ready. Ready is a.
Myth. Remember, courage is a decision.
So this week, take. One tiny.
(07:42):
Step look it. Up, Sign up, Send the message
just. Whisper that sacred yes.
All right, let's do a Segment 1 recap.
We traded in the. Idea of.
Adrenaline fueled bravery for something deeper.
Intentional courage, the kind that.
(08:04):
Shows up with age. Wisdom and grit.
We talked about the canoe man and his grandson in Bocas del
Toro. Yeah, how consistent effort and
showing up when it's hard is a form of everyday heroism.
We named the. Quiet fears.
That keep us small and reminded you that movement doesn't need
(08:24):
to be. Big to be brave We covered the
psychology of. Fear and courage.
And we left you with a challenge.
Reclaim one thing fear talked you out of.
Because fear may be in the guardat the gate, but courage still
holds the keys. Coming up next in Segment 2,
we'll unpack what everyday. Courage really looks like.
(08:46):
In your planner, in the mirror and in the thousands.
Of choices. We make when no ones watching so
stick. Around.
We'll be right back. Let's chat about the kind of.
(09:10):
Courage that doesn't need. Fireworks.
Not the movie montage, not the big cinematic triumph.
We're talking everyday courage, the kind you carry into work,
into conversations, into your own mirror.
Courage doesn't just show up in burning buildings, it shows up
(09:30):
in boundary setting in asking for what you want.
I love. To set a boundary.
In trying something new at 63 when everyone told you it was
too late. Or simply choosing to not
abandon yourself today. Courage doesn't have to.
Look epic. It just has to look true.
This is what we share with everyone.
(09:51):
Courage isn't a trait, it's a muscle.
You train it in small reps every.
Day like saying no without explaining yourself or walking
into a new room with. Your head held.
High even when you feel invisible.
It's walking your own walk, evenwhen nobody.
(10:11):
Else sees it. Every time you choose honesty
over comfort, your courage muscle grows.
Oh, so flex. That muscle?
Think about it, every time you show up as you are not who
people expect you to be, you're flexing that bravery.
You know, that's why I love. Photographing retreats it's not.
About curated perfection. It's about people.
(10:34):
Showing up afraid, but they do it anyway.
Yeah, you can feel it when someone is choosing truth.
The camera doesn't lie. You see the before.
And after on their. Face you.
See, the moment they stop tryingto be likable and they.
(10:54):
Just simply let go. And are free.
That moment right there, that's the magic.
Agreed. That's courage with bare feet
and a full heart. Absolutely.
Fear is a liar. It's a liar.
And a good one. Fear's job is to keep you safe,
and boy is it convincing. It dresses up in logic, rolls in
(11:17):
sounding responsible, and makes a hell of an argument for
staying in your comfort zone. Have you ever heard it whisper?
You might. Fail.
How about this? One, you're not good enough, but
it doesn't tell you. The real risk?
That's staying stuck. Right, exactly.
Playing small feels safe, but it's a slow kind of dying.
(11:40):
No adventure, no growth, just loops and regrets.
Do you want to know the secret? I want to know the secret.
Fear shows up most when you're standing at the edge of
something sacred. It's not a stop sign, it's a
signal. This matters.
Right. That's why our book A Guide for
(12:01):
Aging Heroes, talks so much about meaning over fear.
You don't need to destroy fear. You need to walk past it with
your purpose in hand. Risk is the currency of a.
Life well lived. Let's go deeper.
Why do we resist risk so much rusty?
(12:23):
Why? Because we've been taught that
stability is the goal. You said social conformity.
Yeah, it really is. We've been taught that comfort
equals success, but comfort isn't the same as fulfilment.
It's just a soft chair and a room with no windows.
But what if the biggest? Risk is never taking one.
(12:47):
Exactly. I've sat with so many people,
especially later in life, who were haunted not by what they
did, but by what they didn't do.The unspoken dream, the unopened
door, the what if that became a silent ache.
Yeah, I've heard that over and over.
I've seen it too in working in the healthcare field, just in
(13:10):
passing conversations even. It's not the mess.
That breaks us. It's the silence around what we
could have dared I. Love that.
So what if we stop protecting ourselves from the wrong things?
Failure is survivable. Regret is terminal.
Let's talk about the big bad wolf.
(13:33):
In the room. Do you want to know its name?
Sure would. Failure.
Because so many of us don't. Chase courage.
Why? Because we're scared.
To mess up. But failure is just proof that
you tried. It's not a death sentence, it's
a signpost. Ask Thomas Edison who famously
(13:54):
said regarding inventing the light bulb.
I didn't fail. I discovered 10,000 ways that
don't work. I'm going to write that on my
bathroom. Mirror.
Ask literally any person, whoever did something worth
remembering. You've failed.
Before and you're still. Here, you're braver.
Than you think and. Failure.
(14:16):
It's not the end, it's part of your becoming.
I tell my students, if you're not failing, sometimes you're
not stretching far enough. Failure means you're alive and
evolving. It means you give a damn.
How about some quick? Fire.
Real life courage. All right, let's say it.
Here's what everyday courage. Can look like leaving.
(14:37):
The job. That's draining your spirit,
telling your truth to someone who may not like it starting
something new at 6070 or 80. Just because it.
Matters to you. Apologizing first, trying again,
especially after disappointment.Saying no to something that
(14:59):
doesn't. Deserve your peace.
You don't have to burn it all down.
Although that might feel nice. You just have to light one damn
candle, one truth, one decision,one step.
That's what bravery looks like. When it lives in your real life,
it's not going to be Instagram able.
(15:19):
It's not flashy. But it's holy.
OK, let's do Aging Heroes challenge #2 Think of one thing
fear has been keeping you from Not a fantasy.
Something real, something important.
Now take one small, courageous step toward it.
(15:39):
Sign up, make the call, have theconversation.
Show up anyway. Don't wait until you're.
Ready. Do it because you're ready to
stop. Waiting.
Nice segment 2 recap. Let's recap it.
Courage is a daily practice, nota person trait.
(15:59):
Fear will lie to you again and again.
That's the truth. Risk is required for a regret
proof. Life.
Failure is not the enemy. Avoidance is small.
Acts of bravery add up to a boldlife.
And you you don't have. To be epic, you just have to be.
(16:22):
Brave enough to try coming up next in segment.
Three, the quiet power. Of letting go.
Yeah, in segment 3, we're going even deeper.
The quiet power of surrender. Why letting go can be braver
than holding on? And how aging heroes become.
Spiritual warriors. Not by fighting harder.
(16:44):
But by. Releasing what no longer serves.
So don't go anywhere. The battle may be daily, but you
don't have to fight it alone. Imagine a forest path just after
(17:06):
a thunderstorm. The air is thick with the smell
of pine and rain. Everything feels hushed, like
the world is holding its breath.You stand there, soaked,
carrying a backpack that's heavier than you remember.
You're not sure why you brought half the stuff in it, but ahead
there's sunlight filtering through the canopy and all that
(17:29):
stands between you and it is letting go.
We don't talk about that kind of.
Bravery enough, do we? We don't.
The kind that. Steps off the battlefield.
And says I don't need to win, I need.
To be whole I. Like that?
Yeah, not louder, not faster, just more honest.
(17:49):
There is a Zen master quote thatI love.
What is that? Sometimes sitting and doing
nothing is the best action you can take.
It sounds simple, but in a culture obsessed with hustle and
performance, stillness is rebellion.
That takes a lot of. Work and intention stillness.
(18:09):
Forces you to feel. It strips away distractions.
It whispers truths. That action can drown out
sometimes the bravest thing you can.
Do is pause? Sometimes we choose to fight
just to avoid the quiet, the work mirror.
(18:29):
We armor up with busyness so we don't have to hear what's going
on underneath. But the people who pause?
Long enough to listen, they often find clarity, direction,
healing. Stillness isn't laziness, it's
precision. We've both seen this.
People think surrender means giving up, but surrender can be
(18:53):
strategic. Yes, it says this no longer
serves me and I don't need to carry it anymore.
Surrender is. Often the gateway to
individuation. It's the letting go of old
roles, old masks. False selves.
And yes, it can be painful, but.It's also very freeing.
(19:16):
In my therapist days, I saw people stay in marriages, jobs
and identities out of fear because surrender felt like
failure. Yeah, but it wasn't.
It was the beginning of something real.
That's. The Phoenix moment.
The ashes don't lie. You burn what you no longer
need, and you. Rise a bit lighter.
(19:37):
Yes. Not because you're empty,
because you finally made room for what matters.
Let's be clear, Surrender isn't the absence of fire, it's just a
different kind of flame. Focused, clear and controlled.
It's the moment you stop swinging the sword and start
wielding your soul instead. Surrender doesn't mean you.
(19:59):
Lost the battle. It means you changed.
The Battlefield. And that's a different kind of
power. It is.
It doesn't demand attention, butit commands respect.
I like that. I think of surrender like
pruning a tree. It looks like loss, but what
you're really. Doing is making space for new
(20:22):
growth, right? One of the bravest things you
can do. That's let people.
See, you let them. Help let.
Them love the messy growing parts of you.
Yeah, I used to believe I had tobe the strong one all the time,
especially in the classroom or in therapy in my own family.
But hiding my struggle didn't make me strong, it made me
(20:44):
lonely. So the lone wolf.
Story Share that. OK, the lone wolf story is this
myth that it's heroic and noble to be this lone warrior fighting
the world alone. So we're saying it's busted,
right? It's busted.
It's really extremely unhealthy.Human beings are not wired for
(21:06):
that. Yeah, we're not meant to do this
alone. Connection.
That's courage. Letting someone hold, hold your
truth with you is an act of bravery.
It's not weakness to be witnessed, it's wisdom.
And when? You let others.
See your pain, your hope you're becoming.
They might just. Show up with theirs.
Too. That's community.
(21:27):
That's healing. There's another kind of courage
that never gets enough credit. Stopping.
Stopping the fight that's straining you.
Stopping the pattern that's numbing you.
Stopping the noise so you can hear yourself again.
Stopping isn't quitting. Stopping is choosing a different
way forward, and sometimes it's the only way forward.
(21:50):
Stopping might mean resting, ending, detaching, but never
giving up on yourself. Sometimes stopping looks like
saying I'm not OK. Sometimes it looks like
canceling the meeting and going outside instead.
Sure. Sometimes it's closing a door
that everyone else thinks shouldstay open.
(22:12):
And what if that scares you? Good.
It just means you're awake. Yeah.
Aging Heroes challenge #3. What are you still?
Carrying that no longer belongs.To you this.
Week Make a list of things. You're done pretending.
Done pretending you're fine. Done pretending it doesn't hurt.
(22:35):
Done pretending you don't need to.
Keep it all together. Pick one thing and we want you
to. Release it, say it out loud.
Let go like your future. Depends on it.
Because it does. OK, let's do a Segment 3 recap.
Stillness is not laziness, it's a form of listening.
(22:57):
Surrender is not weakness, it's sacred discernment.
Connection is courage in community.
Knowing when to stop is as braveas knowing when to charge ahead.
Coming up next, we're taking allof this and stretching it across
time because courage isn't a spark.
(23:17):
It's a slow steady. Flame.
We'll explore the long game of courage, how to stay bold
without burning out, and how everyday heroes leave brave
footprints for the ones who comenext.
See you on the other side, braveones.
(23:44):
All right, heroes, this is whereit gets real.
Get. Real.
Not the spark of a brave beginning.
Not the fire of rising from failure.
Not that. But the steady burn of living
boldly, daily, intentionally andrelentlessly.
Because a courageous life. Isn't built on one epic moment,
(24:09):
it's built on 1000 tiny ones. I love that because life is not
a movie. It's so true.
Those mundane. Acts of bravery.
That no one sees. That's the courageous stuff, the
choice to show. Up again and again, even when
it's inconvenient, unglamorous are just.
(24:33):
Hard. Right.
Courage doesn't just happen. You have to practice it like a
musician, like a monk, like a damn warrior.
It becomes part of your rhythm, a daily song of choosing
presence over protection. That's a key take away.
It is. You need to be intentional about
(24:54):
practicing. Yes, it's a.
Lifestyle. Not a lightning strike it.
Lives in your daily. Rituals Your Voice your.
Boundaries your creation. Gate of Fire, your rest.
Think of it like reps in a gym. You build it by doing saying no
without guilt, saying yes without permission, trying again
(25:18):
without shame. You build courage by.
Telling the truth when it might be.
Easier to tell a little lie by. Sitting with discomfort instead
of numbing it by asking for helpinstead of white knuckling
through life alone. Every time you show up for your
values, even in micro ways, you're laying bricks on the path
(25:42):
of a bold life. Managing fear in the moment.
What do you do when fear hijacksyour brain for the moment?
Putting my tactical gear on. When your inner critic has the
mic and it's preaching doom and caution.
You interrupt the spiral one of my.
(26:03):
Favorite tools? Mel Robbins 5 Second Rule.
You feel the fear. Count. 5432.
One then act, move before your brain talks you out of it.
It reminds me of the story of you and Talos ziplining across
the rainforest in Costa Rica. That's.
(26:23):
Right, I could not. Believe that our daughter.
Put on the harness, the gear andwas like, I'm going first,
right? She jumped out and then you had
to jump out without thinking because you weren't going to let
her go by herself. That's it.
And it was so outside of my comfort zone because I
definitely. Have a fear of heights?
Another tool is reframing. I am all about some reframing.
(26:48):
Fear and excitement feel exactlythe same in the body.
That's interesting. Yeah.
When your palms sweat and your heart races, tell yourself I'm
not scared, I'm ready. I'm writing that down.
I love. That one for sure.
You don't need to. Wait for show up.
Summon it and you practice untilthat summoning becomes instinct.
(27:09):
Exactly. Now let's flip it again.
Because sometimes courage doesn't mean pushing harder, it
means letting go. Courage can be soft.
It can be walking away from a dream that no longer.
Serves you. It can be forgiving someone.
Who maybe feel like. Doesn't.
Deserve it because you. Deserve the freedom.
(27:29):
Or releasing the identity that'sbeen safe but suffering,
indicating that job, that persona, that way of shrinking
yourself to make others comfortable.
We think. Courage means fighting, but
sometimes it means trusting. It means letting go, stepping
back, believing that what comes next that that will be enough,
(27:51):
even if you don't control it. And here's the kicker.
Courage is never just personal. It's also contagious.
Courage is never just personal, it's contagious.
Yeah, in a situation where someone is in peril and there's
a large group of people, there'sthis bystander effect where
nobody does anything. OK, As soon as one person acts,
(28:15):
Mm Hmm. Everyone acts.
Yes. When you stand up, you give
others permission to do the samewhen you live.
Boldly, you create a ripple effect.
Your kids feel it. Your families feel it.
Your friends feel it. Your community shifts.
It's one of the greatest joys ofmy life, watching students,
clients, even strangers light upwhen someone finally models what
(28:38):
it looks like to live an alignedlife.
You don't have to have it. All figured out.
You just have to go first be theflashlight.
In someone else's darkroom. Let's say it clearly aging takes
guts, and it's not for the faintof heart.
You lose people, you. Face your limits, you.
Wrestle. With invisibility and still.
(29:01):
You rise, you choose growth, depth, purpose, presence.
You shift from proving to becoming, and every courageous
choice adds a new page to your legacy.
I love that. From proving to becoming.
Because your courage it's. Not.
Just yours, it's a gift. To every generation coming up
(29:24):
behind you. And make no mistake, aging
heroes rewrite the rulebook. You're not fading.
You're not. You are flaming.
So fan the Flame Aging Heroes challenge #4 write down 1 area.
Of your life where? You've been living small.
(29:45):
Now ask yourself, what would courage look like here?
What would your future self thank you for?
What are you afraid of, and what's worth being afraid of?
Now take one action, one move, big or small.
But take it. Do it with your whole heart.
And trust that the leap will land you somewhere sacred.
(30:07):
It's time for our final. Recap Courage is a.
Practice, not a performance. Fear isn't the enemy, it's a
compass pointing to what matters.
Letting go is just as. Brave as holding on.
Your choices echo. Courage changes you and everyone
(30:27):
around you. Aging is a heroic.
Act every bold step. Expands your story.
If this episode hit your heart, it spoke to you.
Share it. Text A.
Friend tag us and go follow us on Instagram and Facebook at
Aging Heroes. You can also find our full.
(30:49):
Tribe at WWW. Dot agingheroes.com.
If you're looking for sign, thisis it.
This is your moment. Don't wait, don't shrink, don't
doubt, Live courageously. Keep your compass true.
Your heart.
Picture this. You're standing at the edge of a
small tropical island, barefoot in the sand.
A salty. Breeze brushing your cheeks and
the rhythmic. Tap.
Of palm leaves whispering secrets.
Above you. You've got a canoe tied up at.
The dock. The water is calm.
But it's wide. Beyond.
(00:21):
You is the safety. Of a hammock and a.
Chilled drink ahead of you. There's.
Possibility. Mystery.
The kind. Of mourning where the horizon
feels like an invitation. You could stay put.
You've survived storms, buried anchors, and learned a thing or
two about the tides. It's something in you stirs.
(00:43):
It's not about being restless. It's about remembering you're
still meant to move, to paddle, to risk.
Because courage in this season of life isn't about chasing
thrills. It's about honoring the part of
you that refuses to go dormant. Welcome to The Latitude
(01:05):
Adjustment, an aging heroes podcast where midlife isn't a
crisis, it's a call to adventurehosted by Randolph and Erica
Harrison. This is your unapologetic
permission slip to live bold, barefoot, and wildly beyond the
script. Randolph is a Gallup certified
strengths coach and award-winning college educator
who believes the second-half of life is where the real story
(01:25):
begins. Erica is a globetrotting
Wellness guide and union life coach who once ran the Mount
Kilimanjaro Marathon. Because of course she did.
Together, they're here to help you bust myths about aging,
share fierce stories of transformation, and challenge
you to rise, rewire, and reclaimyour own wild path forward.
So kick off your shoes or something strong.
This isn't just a podcast, it's a movement.
(01:47):
Your day one starts now. Welcome Amigos, you're listening
to the. Latitude adjustment.
I'm Erica. And I'm rusty.
Hey, Rusty. And today, we're cracking open
one of our favorite chapters from A Guide for Aging Heroes
Day 5. Live courageously.
(02:09):
This isn't about skydiving or going off grid.
It's about those moments when fear doesn't show up with fangs.
It shows up wearing khakis. It's saying something like maybe
next year or you've missed your.Shot.
Right. It's not the monster under the
bed, it's the voice saying you're too old, you're too
tired, or even just play it safe.
(02:32):
So. Today we want to take you to a
small island. It's Isla Cologne in Panama.
There's a little Bay. There called Saigon Bay.
Bocas del Toro. And one Tuesday morning, we
witnessed something that stoppedus in our tracks.
It was an elderly Indigenous manand his grandson paddling A
(02:54):
dugout canoe across the water. No motor, no music.
Just wood, water and willpower. The rain was pouring down.
The canoe was filled with fruits, fish and vegetables
they'd harvested or traded the day before their route.
House to house, water to doorstep.
Yeah. Selling to families who live in
(03:16):
over the water homes. It was the.
Coolest thing I remember standing in our open air
kitchen. I had my coffee in hand, the
rain that was just showering down over the mangroves.
You could still hear every dip of that.
Hand carved. Paddle like a heartbeat.
No rush, just presents. I thought to myself, this is
(03:39):
courage. Not loud, not flashy, but
consistent and purposeful. Purposeful.
Yes. That elderly man could have
stopped years ago. Sure.
But there he was, teaching his grandson how to live with his
hands, his back, and his honor. Even when the wind picked up,
even when the rain hammered down, he didn't turn back.
(04:01):
He just adjusted his. Stroke and that's.
What bravery looks. Like when it ceased.
Not dramatic, just steady. So let's pause for a quick
teaching moment. I love a teaching.
Moment from a teacher. All right, so here's what we
know from psychology. Fear isn't a weakness, it's a
signal. It lives in the amygdala, that
tiny almond shaped part of your brain wired for survival.
(04:25):
It's trying to protect you from danger.
But here's the twist. Your brain doesn't know the
difference between an angry bearand a uncomfortable e-mail.
Brain. It can't differentiate between a
real threat and emotional vulnerability.
And that's where courage comes in.
It's not about shutting fear down.
(04:46):
It's about moving forward. While fear rides shotgun.
Exactly. Courage activates a different
part of the brain, the prefrontal cortex.
That's the seat of decision making and meaning.
So when you take a step towards something that matters, even
while you're scared, your brain begins to to rewire.
(05:07):
You're literally training yourself to become braver.
Note to self operate from my prefrontal cortex, so if you
feel. Fear.
It means you're. Alive.
And if you act anyway, that's courage and motion.
(05:27):
It reminded me, living courageously doesn't mean you
aren't scared, It means you keepshowing up anyway.
That's so important. Important.
And not just for the big dreams,for the small ones too.
The everyday ones that make yourlife more yours.
Maybe for you it's. Going to be picking up the
(05:48):
guitar again or calling someone you haven't spoken to since the
world turned upside down. Maybe it's starting therapy or
ending a relationship or tellingthe.
Truth about what you. Really want next.
Maybe it's putting your name in the hat for something that
lights your soul on fire, even if you're not sure you'll get
(06:12):
picked. Courage doesn't always.
Roar. Sometimes it's.
Just a quiet shaky yes. To your own damn life.
We've had to find our way back to courage, too.
Once or twice or 10 times. There were times we stalled out,
got stuck in roles or routines that felt more like cages than
(06:34):
calling. Absolutely.
And it didn't take a crisis to shift it, just a whisper of
dissatisfaction. And when we.
Followed that. Whisper even with uncertainty.
Life cracked. Open.
The map got blurry. But the wind, oh, it came back,
and with it, forward movement. Look, we're not saying this is
(06:58):
easy, but what's the alternative?
Numbness. Regret watching someone else
live the life that once had yourname on it.
No, that's not you. You're not done.
You're not irrelevant. You're not out of time.
Aging Heroes challenge #1 Think of something you let go of, not
(07:21):
because it stopped mattering, but because fear got too loud.
A dream, a practice, a version of yourself.
Now ask, is it time to try again?
And don't overthink it. Don't wait until you're.
Ready. Ready is a.
Myth. Remember, courage is a decision.
So this week, take. One tiny.
(07:42):
Step look it. Up, Sign up, Send the message
just. Whisper that sacred yes.
All right, let's do a Segment 1 recap.
We traded in the. Idea of.
Adrenaline fueled bravery for something deeper.
Intentional courage, the kind that.
(08:04):
Shows up with age. Wisdom and grit.
We talked about the canoe man and his grandson in Bocas del
Toro. Yeah, how consistent effort and
showing up when it's hard is a form of everyday heroism.
We named the. Quiet fears.
That keep us small and reminded you that movement doesn't need
(08:24):
to be. Big to be brave We covered the
psychology of. Fear and courage.
And we left you with a challenge.
Reclaim one thing fear talked you out of.
Because fear may be in the guardat the gate, but courage still
holds the keys. Coming up next in Segment 2,
we'll unpack what everyday. Courage really looks like.
(08:46):
In your planner, in the mirror and in the thousands.
Of choices. We make when no ones watching so
stick. Around.
We'll be right back. Let's chat about the kind of.
(09:10):
Courage that doesn't need. Fireworks.
Not the movie montage, not the big cinematic triumph.
We're talking everyday courage, the kind you carry into work,
into conversations, into your own mirror.
Courage doesn't just show up in burning buildings, it shows up
(09:30):
in boundary setting in asking for what you want.
I love. To set a boundary.
In trying something new at 63 when everyone told you it was
too late. Or simply choosing to not
abandon yourself today. Courage doesn't have to.
Look epic. It just has to look true.
This is what we share with everyone.
(09:51):
Courage isn't a trait, it's a muscle.
You train it in small reps every.
Day like saying no without explaining yourself or walking
into a new room with. Your head held.
High even when you feel invisible.
It's walking your own walk, evenwhen nobody.
(10:11):
Else sees it. Every time you choose honesty
over comfort, your courage muscle grows.
Oh, so flex. That muscle?
Think about it, every time you show up as you are not who
people expect you to be, you're flexing that bravery.
You know, that's why I love. Photographing retreats it's not.
About curated perfection. It's about people.
(10:34):
Showing up afraid, but they do it anyway.
Yeah, you can feel it when someone is choosing truth.
The camera doesn't lie. You see the before.
And after on their. Face you.
See, the moment they stop tryingto be likable and they.
(10:54):
Just simply let go. And are free.
That moment right there, that's the magic.
Agreed. That's courage with bare feet
and a full heart. Absolutely.
Fear is a liar. It's a liar.
And a good one. Fear's job is to keep you safe,
and boy is it convincing. It dresses up in logic, rolls in
(11:17):
sounding responsible, and makes a hell of an argument for
staying in your comfort zone. Have you ever heard it whisper?
You might. Fail.
How about this? One, you're not good enough, but
it doesn't tell you. The real risk?
That's staying stuck. Right, exactly.
Playing small feels safe, but it's a slow kind of dying.
(11:40):
No adventure, no growth, just loops and regrets.
Do you want to know the secret? I want to know the secret.
Fear shows up most when you're standing at the edge of
something sacred. It's not a stop sign, it's a
signal. This matters.
Right. That's why our book A Guide for
(12:01):
Aging Heroes, talks so much about meaning over fear.
You don't need to destroy fear. You need to walk past it with
your purpose in hand. Risk is the currency of a.
Life well lived. Let's go deeper.
Why do we resist risk so much rusty?
(12:23):
Why? Because we've been taught that
stability is the goal. You said social conformity.
Yeah, it really is. We've been taught that comfort
equals success, but comfort isn't the same as fulfilment.
It's just a soft chair and a room with no windows.
But what if the biggest? Risk is never taking one.
(12:47):
Exactly. I've sat with so many people,
especially later in life, who were haunted not by what they
did, but by what they didn't do.The unspoken dream, the unopened
door, the what if that became a silent ache.
Yeah, I've heard that over and over.
I've seen it too in working in the healthcare field, just in
(13:10):
passing conversations even. It's not the mess.
That breaks us. It's the silence around what we
could have dared I. Love that.
So what if we stop protecting ourselves from the wrong things?
Failure is survivable. Regret is terminal.
Let's talk about the big bad wolf.
(13:33):
In the room. Do you want to know its name?
Sure would. Failure.
Because so many of us don't. Chase courage.
Why? Because we're scared.
To mess up. But failure is just proof that
you tried. It's not a death sentence, it's
a signpost. Ask Thomas Edison who famously
(13:54):
said regarding inventing the light bulb.
I didn't fail. I discovered 10,000 ways that
don't work. I'm going to write that on my
bathroom. Mirror.
Ask literally any person, whoever did something worth
remembering. You've failed.
Before and you're still. Here, you're braver.
Than you think and. Failure.
(14:16):
It's not the end, it's part of your becoming.
I tell my students, if you're not failing, sometimes you're
not stretching far enough. Failure means you're alive and
evolving. It means you give a damn.
How about some quick? Fire.
Real life courage. All right, let's say it.
Here's what everyday courage. Can look like leaving.
(14:37):
The job. That's draining your spirit,
telling your truth to someone who may not like it starting
something new at 6070 or 80. Just because it.
Matters to you. Apologizing first, trying again,
especially after disappointment.Saying no to something that
(14:59):
doesn't. Deserve your peace.
You don't have to burn it all down.
Although that might feel nice. You just have to light one damn
candle, one truth, one decision,one step.
That's what bravery looks like. When it lives in your real life,
it's not going to be Instagram able.
(15:19):
It's not flashy. But it's holy.
OK, let's do Aging Heroes challenge #2 Think of one thing
fear has been keeping you from Not a fantasy.
Something real, something important.
Now take one small, courageous step toward it.
(15:39):
Sign up, make the call, have theconversation.
Show up anyway. Don't wait until you're.
Ready. Do it because you're ready to
stop. Waiting.
Nice segment 2 recap. Let's recap it.
Courage is a daily practice, nota person trait.
(15:59):
Fear will lie to you again and again.
That's the truth. Risk is required for a regret
proof. Life.
Failure is not the enemy. Avoidance is small.
Acts of bravery add up to a boldlife.
And you you don't have. To be epic, you just have to be.
(16:22):
Brave enough to try coming up next in segment.
Three, the quiet power. Of letting go.
Yeah, in segment 3, we're going even deeper.
The quiet power of surrender. Why letting go can be braver
than holding on? And how aging heroes become.
Spiritual warriors. Not by fighting harder.
(16:44):
But by. Releasing what no longer serves.
So don't go anywhere. The battle may be daily, but you
don't have to fight it alone. Imagine a forest path just after
(17:06):
a thunderstorm. The air is thick with the smell
of pine and rain. Everything feels hushed, like
the world is holding its breath.You stand there, soaked,
carrying a backpack that's heavier than you remember.
You're not sure why you brought half the stuff in it, but ahead
there's sunlight filtering through the canopy and all that
(17:29):
stands between you and it is letting go.
We don't talk about that kind of.
Bravery enough, do we? We don't.
The kind that. Steps off the battlefield.
And says I don't need to win, I need.
To be whole I. Like that?
Yeah, not louder, not faster, just more honest.
(17:49):
There is a Zen master quote thatI love.
What is that? Sometimes sitting and doing
nothing is the best action you can take.
It sounds simple, but in a culture obsessed with hustle and
performance, stillness is rebellion.
That takes a lot of. Work and intention stillness.
(18:09):
Forces you to feel. It strips away distractions.
It whispers truths. That action can drown out
sometimes the bravest thing you can.
Do is pause? Sometimes we choose to fight
just to avoid the quiet, the work mirror.
(18:29):
We armor up with busyness so we don't have to hear what's going
on underneath. But the people who pause?
Long enough to listen, they often find clarity, direction,
healing. Stillness isn't laziness, it's
precision. We've both seen this.
People think surrender means giving up, but surrender can be
(18:53):
strategic. Yes, it says this no longer
serves me and I don't need to carry it anymore.
Surrender is. Often the gateway to
individuation. It's the letting go of old
roles, old masks. False selves.
And yes, it can be painful, but.It's also very freeing.
(19:16):
In my therapist days, I saw people stay in marriages, jobs
and identities out of fear because surrender felt like
failure. Yeah, but it wasn't.
It was the beginning of something real.
That's. The Phoenix moment.
The ashes don't lie. You burn what you no longer
need, and you. Rise a bit lighter.
(19:37):
Yes. Not because you're empty,
because you finally made room for what matters.
Let's be clear, Surrender isn't the absence of fire, it's just a
different kind of flame. Focused, clear and controlled.
It's the moment you stop swinging the sword and start
wielding your soul instead. Surrender doesn't mean you.
(19:59):
Lost the battle. It means you changed.
The Battlefield. And that's a different kind of
power. It is.
It doesn't demand attention, butit commands respect.
I like that. I think of surrender like
pruning a tree. It looks like loss, but what
you're really. Doing is making space for new
(20:22):
growth, right? One of the bravest things you
can do. That's let people.
See, you let them. Help let.
Them love the messy growing parts of you.
Yeah, I used to believe I had tobe the strong one all the time,
especially in the classroom or in therapy in my own family.
But hiding my struggle didn't make me strong, it made me
(20:44):
lonely. So the lone wolf.
Story Share that. OK, the lone wolf story is this
myth that it's heroic and noble to be this lone warrior fighting
the world alone. So we're saying it's busted,
right? It's busted.
It's really extremely unhealthy.Human beings are not wired for
(21:06):
that. Yeah, we're not meant to do this
alone. Connection.
That's courage. Letting someone hold, hold your
truth with you is an act of bravery.
It's not weakness to be witnessed, it's wisdom.
And when? You let others.
See your pain, your hope you're becoming.
They might just. Show up with theirs.
Too. That's community.
(21:27):
That's healing. There's another kind of courage
that never gets enough credit. Stopping.
Stopping the fight that's straining you.
Stopping the pattern that's numbing you.
Stopping the noise so you can hear yourself again.
Stopping isn't quitting. Stopping is choosing a different
way forward, and sometimes it's the only way forward.
(21:50):
Stopping might mean resting, ending, detaching, but never
giving up on yourself. Sometimes stopping looks like
saying I'm not OK. Sometimes it looks like
canceling the meeting and going outside instead.
Sure. Sometimes it's closing a door
that everyone else thinks shouldstay open.
(22:12):
And what if that scares you? Good.
It just means you're awake. Yeah.
Aging Heroes challenge #3. What are you still?
Carrying that no longer belongs.To you this.
Week Make a list of things. You're done pretending.
Done pretending you're fine. Done pretending it doesn't hurt.
(22:35):
Done pretending you don't need to.
Keep it all together. Pick one thing and we want you
to. Release it, say it out loud.
Let go like your future. Depends on it.
Because it does. OK, let's do a Segment 3 recap.
Stillness is not laziness, it's a form of listening.
(22:57):
Surrender is not weakness, it's sacred discernment.
Connection is courage in community.
Knowing when to stop is as braveas knowing when to charge ahead.
Coming up next, we're taking allof this and stretching it across
time because courage isn't a spark.
(23:17):
It's a slow steady. Flame.
We'll explore the long game of courage, how to stay bold
without burning out, and how everyday heroes leave brave
footprints for the ones who comenext.
See you on the other side, braveones.
(23:44):
All right, heroes, this is whereit gets real.
Get. Real.
Not the spark of a brave beginning.
Not the fire of rising from failure.
Not that. But the steady burn of living
boldly, daily, intentionally andrelentlessly.
Because a courageous life. Isn't built on one epic moment,
(24:09):
it's built on 1000 tiny ones. I love that because life is not
a movie. It's so true.
Those mundane. Acts of bravery.
That no one sees. That's the courageous stuff, the
choice to show. Up again and again, even when
it's inconvenient, unglamorous are just.
(24:33):
Hard. Right.
Courage doesn't just happen. You have to practice it like a
musician, like a monk, like a damn warrior.
It becomes part of your rhythm, a daily song of choosing
presence over protection. That's a key take away.
It is. You need to be intentional about
(24:54):
practicing. Yes, it's a.
Lifestyle. Not a lightning strike it.
Lives in your daily. Rituals Your Voice your.
Boundaries your creation. Gate of Fire, your rest.
Think of it like reps in a gym. You build it by doing saying no
without guilt, saying yes without permission, trying again
(25:18):
without shame. You build courage by.
Telling the truth when it might be.
Easier to tell a little lie by. Sitting with discomfort instead
of numbing it by asking for helpinstead of white knuckling
through life alone. Every time you show up for your
values, even in micro ways, you're laying bricks on the path
(25:42):
of a bold life. Managing fear in the moment.
What do you do when fear hijacksyour brain for the moment?
Putting my tactical gear on. When your inner critic has the
mic and it's preaching doom and caution.
You interrupt the spiral one of my.
(26:03):
Favorite tools? Mel Robbins 5 Second Rule.
You feel the fear. Count. 5432.
One then act, move before your brain talks you out of it.
It reminds me of the story of you and Talos ziplining across
the rainforest in Costa Rica. That's.
(26:23):
Right, I could not. Believe that our daughter.
Put on the harness, the gear andwas like, I'm going first,
right? She jumped out and then you had
to jump out without thinking because you weren't going to let
her go by herself. That's it.
And it was so outside of my comfort zone because I
definitely. Have a fear of heights?
Another tool is reframing. I am all about some reframing.
(26:48):
Fear and excitement feel exactlythe same in the body.
That's interesting. Yeah.
When your palms sweat and your heart races, tell yourself I'm
not scared, I'm ready. I'm writing that down.
I love. That one for sure.
You don't need to. Wait for show up.
Summon it and you practice untilthat summoning becomes instinct.
(27:09):
Exactly. Now let's flip it again.
Because sometimes courage doesn't mean pushing harder, it
means letting go. Courage can be soft.
It can be walking away from a dream that no longer.
Serves you. It can be forgiving someone.
Who maybe feel like. Doesn't.
Deserve it because you. Deserve the freedom.
(27:29):
Or releasing the identity that'sbeen safe but suffering,
indicating that job, that persona, that way of shrinking
yourself to make others comfortable.
We think. Courage means fighting, but
sometimes it means trusting. It means letting go, stepping
back, believing that what comes next that that will be enough,
(27:51):
even if you don't control it. And here's the kicker.
Courage is never just personal. It's also contagious.
Courage is never just personal, it's contagious.
Yeah, in a situation where someone is in peril and there's
a large group of people, there'sthis bystander effect where
nobody does anything. OK, As soon as one person acts,
(28:15):
Mm Hmm. Everyone acts.
Yes. When you stand up, you give
others permission to do the samewhen you live.
Boldly, you create a ripple effect.
Your kids feel it. Your families feel it.
Your friends feel it. Your community shifts.
It's one of the greatest joys ofmy life, watching students,
clients, even strangers light upwhen someone finally models what
(28:38):
it looks like to live an alignedlife.
You don't have to have it. All figured out.
You just have to go first be theflashlight.
In someone else's darkroom. Let's say it clearly aging takes
guts, and it's not for the faintof heart.
You lose people, you. Face your limits, you.
Wrestle. With invisibility and still.
(29:01):
You rise, you choose growth, depth, purpose, presence.
You shift from proving to becoming, and every courageous
choice adds a new page to your legacy.
I love that. From proving to becoming.
Because your courage it's. Not.
Just yours, it's a gift. To every generation coming up
(29:24):
behind you. And make no mistake, aging
heroes rewrite the rulebook. You're not fading.
You're not. You are flaming.
So fan the Flame Aging Heroes challenge #4 write down 1 area.
Of your life where? You've been living small.
(29:45):
Now ask yourself, what would courage look like here?
What would your future self thank you for?
What are you afraid of, and what's worth being afraid of?
Now take one action, one move, big or small.
But take it. Do it with your whole heart.
And trust that the leap will land you somewhere sacred.
(30:07):
It's time for our final. Recap Courage is a.
Practice, not a performance. Fear isn't the enemy, it's a
compass pointing to what matters.
Letting go is just as. Brave as holding on.
Your choices echo. Courage changes you and everyone
(30:27):
around you. Aging is a heroic.
Act every bold step. Expands your story.
If this episode hit your heart, it spoke to you.
Share it. Text A.
Friend tag us and go follow us on Instagram and Facebook at
Aging Heroes. You can also find our full.
(30:49):
Tribe at WWW. Dot agingheroes.com.
If you're looking for sign, thisis it.
This is your moment. Don't wait, don't shrink, don't
doubt, Live courageously. Keep your compass true.
Your heart.
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