Perspective, Impact, Grace: How Hope Became a Family Mission

How do you survive the death of your husband, then one child... and then another? How do you hold on to hope when your own children are battling the same rare genetic cancer that took their father?

In this extraordinary episode of The P-I-G, sisters Kellie and Erin sit down with Diane Herman, a mother, founder, and unwavering woman of faith whose story defies understanding—and radiates grace.

Diane walks us through her unimaginable journey:
 💔 The loss of her husband Travis after a 13-year battle with cancer.
 💔 The loss of her daughters Hope and Isabelle, both diagnosed with the same rare genetic disease.
 💙 Marrying Justin (Travis's brother) and the simultaneous cancer diagnoses of her son Slate and daughter Isabelle—just one week apart.
 🌍 And the life-changing decision to move to Guatemala and found House of Hope, a children’s home that has now served over 170 children.

Through every heartbreak, Diane found purpose. Today, she pours her love into the children of Guatemala, leads two non-profits (House of Hope + the Loom Project), and continues to live out the very legacy her children inspired. Her words are rooted in faith, resilience, and an unwavering belief that legacy is built not in what we leave behind—but in how we live through life’s hardest moments.

Released just before Mother’s Day, this episode honors not only the strength of one extraordinary mother—but the unbreakable bond between love, loss, and legacy. Whether you're navigating your own grief, supporting a loved one, or simply seeking light in the darkness, Diane’s story is one you’ll never forget.

Show Resources & Links: 

• Learn about & support House of Hope & The Lüm Project
• Purchase & read Mothers Like Me: Stories of Faith, Hope, and Love in Loss

Support the show

Hearing the stories of others helps us create a more meaningful connection to our own—because legacy isn’t just what we leave behind, it’s how we live right now.

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Episode Transcript

Kellie (00:09):
How do you survive the death of your husband, then one
child and then another?
How do you hold on to hope whenyour own children are battling
the same rare genetic cancerthat took their father?
And how do you take all thatgrief and use it to build
something beautiful for others?

Erin (00:26):
Diane Herman doesn't just have answers.
She's living proof that legacyisn't what we leave behind.
It's how we face what's givento us and live through it, even
and especially when we don'tunderstand it and can't make
sense of it.
Welcome to the PIG, where weexplore life, love, loss and
legacy through realconversations and meaningful

(00:48):
stories.
We're your hosts.
I'm Erin.
.
.

Kellie (00:51):
.
.
.
and I'm Kellie.
Today's conversation invitesyou into a story of deep faith,
unimaginable loss and unwaveringpurpose.
Through every twist and trial,Diane Herman has continued to
show up with love, courage,extraordinary grace and a
mission that now serves hundredsof women, children and families

(01:11):
across Guatemala.
Her life is a testimony to whatit means to carry hope forward
through heartbreak, into healingand out into the world.

(01:42):
Well, Diane, it is such apleasure and a privilege and an
honor, quite honestly, to haveyou joining us today.
We have a lot of ground tocover.
I want to lay the foundationfor our listeners about how we
even got here to begin with.
So all three of us are fromColorado.
Our history goes back to themid-2000s, when you and I both

(02:05):
owned franchises across thestate from each other.
I was in Grand Junction and youwere in Fort Collins, and I was
in Fort Collins visiting Erinwith a friend of mine, and Erin
said to me don't make any plansfor dinner, I have plans for
dinner.
And so she went into therefrigerator and she pulled out
this pre-made meal and Tammy andI our jaws just hit the ground.

(02:29):
We were just in awe of what shepulled out and what she made.
I can't remember, Erin, what itwas I think it was some kind of
casserole but it was incredibleand it was from a meal prep
food business that you ownedcalled Supper Solutions.
It was a franchise based inDenver that you owned called
Supper Solutions.
It was a franchise based inDenver and within a matter of
weeks, tammy and I decided wewere going to open Supper
Solutions in Western Colorado,and so we did.

(02:52):
It was an incredible ride.
We worked together as colleaguesand became friends through that
process, and it was during thattime that I really got to know
the depth of your beautifulfamily story and your family's
legacy and your journey fromthen to now is one of the most

(03:13):
extraordinary life experiencesthat I've ever watched unfold.
Of anybody that I know, it's atrue inspiration.
There's many layers of lossthat are part of your journey in
a very short life already, butthe way that you have approached
that and handled that with suchgrace, your faith, and how you

(03:37):
have tapped into resilience andperseverance and continue to
show up in the world everysingle day with unbridled joy
and I know it's not always easyis something that I have truly
admired, both close and fromafar, and so I really look
forward to exploring andunpacking that journey today and

(03:58):
, Erin and I deeply appreciateyou agreeing to be here and be
with us and to share yourjourney and your story of life,
love, loss and legacy with ourlisteners.

Diane (04:08):
Wow, that's quite an introduction.
Thank you so much for having meand I can tell you for sure
it's only because of the Lordthat I'm sitting here today, for
sure.
So yeah, our story started.
My story started back inWestern Kansas.
I was born and raised there andwent to K-State and started
dating my soon-to-be husband andhe was the oldest of four boys

(04:31):
and I was the youngest of threegirls.
In our senior year of collegewe got engaged.
That was in August, and inMarch we went home for spring
break to just put final toucheson the wedding and the wedding
was set for May 29th, and thatwas in 1993.
And when we went home on springbreak his mom thought he looked
a little pale.
So she took him to the doctorand after several tests, in a
few weeks he was diagnosed withstage four colon cancer.

(04:54):
It was the first real blow ofmy life.
Raised in a Christian home neverreally had super amount of
challenges in my life thatrequired a ton of faith, but
when that happened it sure didchange that perspective.
So we knew that God had broughtus together and that was what
we were supposed to do.
So, even though they said hewas going to live three months

(05:15):
and I knew I was supposed to behis wife for however long he was
on this earth.
So we he had surgery to removemoved two feet of his colon and
started chemotherapy and a weeklater, May 29th, we got married
and the first seven months ofour marriage he was on treatment
and it was a really interesting, quickly growing up season for

(05:36):
us.
He just was on chemo everyFriday at noon and then he would
be really sick all weekend andthen he would go back to work
Monday morning.
He sold animal healthpharmaceuticals and during that
season we learned to not sweatthe small stuff and as a newly
married couple and I wish Icould just put that in a bottle
and give it to every newlymarried couple because it helps

(05:58):
you with perspective and what'simportant and it teaches you how
to live kind of a differentlife.
He finished his chemo inDecember and then in January we
got to take our honeymoon toJamaica delayed honeymoon and
came home discovered we wereexpecting our first child, which
was amazing because the doctorsthought he would never be able
to have kids and you know, withthe chemo and everything.

(06:21):
But in September of 1994, Slatewas born and we were just
overwhelmed with joy, because Iwanted so badly to be able to
give him a child.
He loved his little brothersand grew up taking care of them,
and he just was one of thosemen that's meant to be a dad.
So, right after Slate was born,the cancer came back for the

(06:41):
first time.
It came back to his liver, andwe were just pretty blown away,
and it was a huge challenge formy faith, because I had prayed
three times a day for a year anda half for that cancer to never
return, and thanking God forhealing, and when that happened,
it just really brought me to myknees and I had to decide if
that was something I couldcontinue to trust God with.

(07:04):
And, of course, we didn't havea lot of choice at that time,
and I wasn't at the place whereI could walk away and do it on
my own.
So we went to Houston, to MDAnderson, and he had some
different surgeries for thetumors in his liver, and over
about the next about seven years, his cancer came back about
every year to 18 months, to hisliver Came back five different

(07:26):
times.
So during that time, though, wegot to be blessed with our
daughter, hope, and then Isabelin 2000, which was just such a
blessing and I never gave up onhaving faith in the Lord and his
will for us and knowing that heis good and he is sovereign,
and I had to just pour into thatwith my whole heart and leave

(07:47):
nothing on the table.
And that's kind of how I'velearned to live my life and very
much teaching our kids whenthey were growing up that this
is not our home and we arepassing through and this life is
short and this life is just amist compared to eternity it
talks about in Deuteronomy.
So we very much had our kids beheaven focused, and I'm really
glad I did.
It changed who they were, itchanged how I parented, it

(08:09):
changed our goals as familiesand it just was a really good
thing to give your kids as faras faith in this.
This world is not our own.
So, moving on, we moved to EstesPark, Colorado, in 2000, when
Isabelle was born, and that'swhy I got to Colorado, and so we
moved down the mountain about ayear later and the cancer came

(08:30):
back about six months later tohis lungs and it was the first
time in his lungs and inColorado, you know, in the
altitude, that was not a goodthing.
So the Lord had provided and wehad decided to move down anyway
.
We just felt like we should.
So we got to buy a house in aneighborhood.
That was one of the firsthouses out there and back when
houses were so much cheaper thanthey are now.

(08:52):
So we got to start a life downthere and he was still working
full time and doing treatmentand whatnot.
And in about 2005, he struggledand it was the same year that we
opened Supper Solutions.
So we started the store buildout in October of 04, and then
opened in 05 in January, and Ican remember him coming to the

(09:15):
store and sitting on the stooland just watching us prep meat.
He's like I didn't know youwere going to have to prep a
half a beef every day.
The amount of work was justshocking, but it was.
It was, it was, but he wasthere for it and then I could
bring the kids there to thestore and and him and it was a

(09:36):
gift that season was.
So in August of 2005, he hadcontinued to decline and on the
10th he didn't want to dohospice and so we had been at
home and he was on the couch.
I'll never forget.
And he talked to me about hisbrother and about taking care of
our family and I just wouldn'thear of it Because even though I

(09:56):
look back at pictures andTravis was so sick, I didn't
even contemplate the idea of himdying.
And that night it was about 11o'clock and he was fading and I
took the kids upstairs and putthem in bed with me and he
passed away August 10th 2005.
And our kids were 10, 8 and 5at the time and just in that
moment I'm glad I had such afaith, because that is when the

(10:19):
rubber meets the road and youeither trust the Lord or you
just get angry.
The road and you either trustthe Lord or you just get angry,
and anger just doesn't doanybody any good, it's a dead
end.
So I'll never forget the kidspraying over him that night and
Hopi was our prayer warrior andshe just laid her hands on him
and prayed.
And so I was a little nervousthe next day about the kids and

(10:40):
walking in their faith and wewent down to my in-law's house
down the street and Hope prayedfor our meal and she just prayed
for so many good things andother people and she didn't even
blink in her faith and I justpretty much stood in awe,
because that's kind of unusualwith kids and adults, I feel
like.
So during that year was a timeof just kind of circling the

(11:03):
wagons and just surviving, Imean working 12-hour days at
Supper Solutions and being asingle mom man.
That is not for the weak atheart, and I'll never forget
Isabel cried every night for ayear for her dad.
That killed me.
But you know, at SupperSolutions it was so interesting
because all of my customersdidn't really know my personal
life, you know.
So I'd go to the store and thenpeople wouldn't know anything

(11:25):
about me.
So I just threw myself into mywork, and you know that's easy
to do at that place becausethere's so much work.

Kellie (11:33):
There was a lot of work there.
I have a question for you,Diane.
What did you find solace inthat work and being able to
escape in that place?

Diane (11:43):
Absolutely and just, it wasn't rocket science, you know,
it was just hard work and a lotof it and it took my mind off
where I was at, because you know, when you grieve like that, I
just really hesitated to dogrief groups and all those
things because I just was sodiscouraged.
Like it can't change, it's notgoing to change, the next break
I get is when we get to eternity.
So just, I'm not one of thosethat wants to rehash everything

(12:06):
all the time.
I just, for me, don't see a lotof purpose in it.
I mean, the Lord and I spent alot of time together in that
store but as far as a lot ofpeople like to grieve verbal
communication and whatnot and Ijust had to cry out to the Lord
and be still and that's how Idid that year.
That was so hard.
And then during that year Italked to my brother-in-law, who

(12:27):
was 16 months younger thanTravis, and Travis had talked to
him before he died and asked totake care and we were both so
broken.
Some people leave a mark onyour life and some people leave
a crater, and Travis was hisbest friend and he was my world.
So it was just a gift from theLord to be able to have Justin
step into our lives.

(12:47):
And about a year later wedecided to get married.
And people are so funny.
They're like how long did youdate?
I'm like, "date.
I knew what I was getting into.
So did he?
He was a 35-year-old bachelor,like you are getting ready to
move on a rapidly moving train.
I'm like he's the guy that doesMonday night three loads of
laundry, towels, whites anddarks, like he should have been

(13:09):
military.
I'm like this is going to bevery interesting.
So anyway, he stepped up and Ijust felt like God was saying do
this and do it now.
So we talked about it in Mayand got married June the 4th,
and when God pushes me like that, I try hard to do it and be
quick to obey.
And I'm so glad I did, becauseJuly 16th of that year is when

(13:30):
Hope was diagnosed withosteogenic sarcoma and it just
blew me away.
It just so devastating.
And we had her tested and shehad a gene called Leigh-Fermini
syndrome which causes childhoodcancer, which they said that's
what Travis had.
And so we had the other kidstested and Isabel tested
positive and Slate testednegative.
Watching Travis fight and dochemo for 13 years was one thing

(13:51):
, but watching Hope go throughthat, the suffering was so
tremendous.
With that chemo she just puked18 out of 21 days and I mean she
dropped 10 pounds so fast andjust suffered.
She suffered a lot with thesurgery and with the rehab and
just everything.
They took the tumor out inOctober, I believe, of that year
and put in a repitilous femurand just relearning to walk and

(14:16):
she had some tendon damage andit just was hard, you know.
But she didn't lose her faithand she didn't lash out at the
Lord and she just had watchedher dad fight and she knew how
to do this.
So we just did as a family cametogether and it was just a

(14:44):
tough season.
But it showed my kids that thislife is not easy and we don't
deserve an easy life.
That's not what God promised us.
We will have trouble in thisworld.
That's what he promises.
So we talked about that a lotwith her and the next year she
went into full remission withthat answer.
It was amazing and we got to doa make a wish trip to Hawaii

(15:05):
and just had the greatest timethat summer.
And then October came in 2007and she just kind of was tired.
So I took her in for a regularcheckup.
They diagnosed her quickly withleukemia at that point and just
devastating Telling your childthat if there's nothing that
doctors can do, I don't everwant to do that again, ever.

(15:27):
It was just how old was she?
She was 10 at the time, yeah,and just we cried and we talked
about a bone marrow transplant.
It was a possibility, but thedoctors really didn't think it
was a good possibility and itwas a lot of pain and suffering.
And she said you know, if theLord wants to heal me, he will,
and if not, I'm ready to go home.

(15:47):
And I mean those words were sobig and powerful.
And so we prayed and we prayed,and we prayed and she got to
record a song in Christ aloneand I still get to listen to it.
It's the most beautiful thing,her little sweet voice.
But she really meant that.
She meant every word of thatsong.
And that was the coolest thingabout her is that her faith

(16:08):
didn't waver.
And I didn't know at the endyou know when your kids change
their mind, and I just prayedfor the Lord for her not to just
change her mind and beg to live, and she didn't.
If anything, she acted excited.
Just hold on.
She was ready to do it.
I just am still blown away byher faith.
So then, january, january, the8th of 2000, I'm sorry, january

(16:30):
11th 2008, she was laying in mybed and in my arms and I'll
never forget.
Her breathing was getting moreshallow and more shallow and she
just looked up and said how doI die, mommy?
And I said is Jesus there?
He's there, just look for him.
And she took her last breath inmy arms and I just felt my
heart shatter in a millionpieces and I just begged the

(16:52):
Lord to bring her back, becausehe can do that.
He did it in the Bible, youknow.
But sometimes God says no andthat's where we have to decide
if we trust him.
And you know, faith is sayingyes, that barrel on this rope
will make it across NiagaraFalls, but trust is when you get
in that barrel, you know when Iwas so in the barrel.
So when that happened, you knowagain, we kind of circled the

(17:14):
wagons and really had to thinkabout why am I here?
What am I here for in this life, you know?
So I was still at SupperSolutions then, but then, in
2011, I closed my store and wentto work at the school where my
kids were, and then we went on amission trip in 2011 to
Guatemala, and I think the Lordjust had our hearts in the right

(17:35):
place, because we came downhere and we saw all these kids
that needed advocates for themand they were abandoned and
abused and suffering and I couldjust feel our hearts turn for
these kids and we had a big fathole in our hearts.
So we went home and prayedabout it and a year later, moved
down full time in 2012.

(17:55):
And, as you know, I didn't havea degree in social work.
I was a business girl and myhusband was sold pharmaceuticals
I mean, not a lick of Spanish.
So I'm like, when God likes touse people that are completely
ill-equipped for his glory,that's us, you know.
So we moved down in 2012 and Igot to meet a little boy at an
orphanage across the city.

(18:16):
His name was Max and he hadmissing one leg.
It was cut off at the knee froma birth defect.
He was missing a finger and athumb and a big toe and on his
other leg was a band.
So it's called restricted bandsyndrome and it happens in utero
and it's where these stringsjust wrap around in different

(18:36):
digits.
And so he was born and hadalready cut off his one leg, but
the band was on the other footand it was around his ankle.
It was pinching, pinching everyday that he would live.
So we'd go over there.
Isabel was 12.
We'd go over there and work onhis little foot and push the
blood up so it would recirculatebecause it wouldn't pump out of
that foot.
And then we got to have surgeryfor him and saved that little
foot and got to know him moreand more and decided he should

(19:00):
be ours, even though totally notthe law in Guatemala.
You're not supposed to know thekid, you're not.
You know we had to getresidency.
We had to jump through many,many, many, many hoops and it
had to be the Lord.
So I'm like if the Lord wantsus to do this, he will make it
happen.
So we worked in the villagesdown here during those years and
at medical clinics and got toknow these women in the village
that I just love so much.

(19:21):
And in 2015, we were able tostart House of Hope, which is a
children's home.
It was really far out of ourrealm of knowledge, but I got to
work at the orphanage where Maxwas at for three years to kind
of learn the ropes from thedirector over there, and she's
an amazing woman of faith,guatemalan gal that just taught
me everything she knew and Ijust soaked it up.
While I played with that kidand Isabel and I would go over

(19:42):
there a lot.
So it was right down the streetfrom Isabella's ballet school
that she went to I found aschool.
We drove by it on the way toMax's orphanage.
So I'm like, hey, there you go.
And it's so funny because inGuatemala it was all covered in
metal and there's guards outside.
It's just a different world.
So I'm like I don't know what'sgoing on in there, but there

(20:10):
was a poster of a ballerina onthe front, like let's go check
that out.
So I went and did that and shewas brave.
She was a different kid too.
So she went in there andstarted doing ballet, all in
Spanish Totally terrifying.
It totally helped her learnSpanish very quickly.
She was our best Spanishspeaker.
So I would go play with Max andwork out that orphanage and she
would do dance.
We did this for several yearsand, yeah, it was really a cool
season.
So in 2015, we opened theorphanage in January and then we
got to adopt Max.
In March.
He came with us and, wow, justour hands were full.

(20:32):
We were so far out of ourleague.
So I've learned every day torely on the Lord for the things
I have to do here and it's justbecome a way of life because
it's so far out of my league.
But it's been really a cooljourney.
And so we were clicking along2015, 16 and 17 and getting more
kids and Isabel got to try outfor the Joffrey Ballet in New

(20:53):
York the school and you know youtell your kids you can do it
and then she got accepted, shegot a scholarship and so when
she was 15, she moved to NewYork and lived on the Upper West
Side and cooked for herself andhomeschooled herself and took
the subway to dance for sixhours a day with really mean
Russian teachers.
So she was an extraordinary kid.

(21:15):
But I knew she had that gene,you know, and when you know your
kid to be on the clock, I amone to help them live their
dreams Absolutely.
And I wanted a lot of peoplelike were you so sad you let her
go?
And I'm like, absolutely not, Iget to spend all of eternity
with her.
And she met some girls in thatschool that she introduced to
church and took them to churchwith her and they still are

(21:37):
friends to this day and it'sjust I'm like, who am I to get
in the way of her work on thisearth that she has to do.
So it was a hard decision, butjust not how I.
I'm a launcher with kids, so Imean it's hard and it's easier
to keep them right here at home,but I know my kids have a
purpose in this world.
So she did Joffrey for a fewyears and then she graduated

(21:59):
early a year and went to LibertyUniversity and Slate had been
at Grand Canyon University forfour years and then he decided
to go to law school, which kindof shocking to me.
We didn't have any of those inour family, but again, I didn't
know what that kid would want todo, and so he went to CU
because of the in-state tuition,which was a lot cheaper
although that killed me becausewe are K-Staters, but anyway,

(22:24):
yeah, so Slate was at CU in hissecond year of law school and
Isabel was in her first secondyear, also at Liberty.
And I got a call Friday night,September 14, 2018.
And Slate said Mom, I went tothe doctor this week, I was kind
of tired and the lab justcalled and they said I need to
go to the ER right now.
And so he told me his count andI'm just like this doesn't even

(22:45):
make sense.
So I called that lab person andthey didn't give me any trouble
with HIPAA, they just told mehis white count.
I'm like, is this leukemic?
And they said it looks like itis.
I mean, I was just stunned,absolutely stunned, because this
was my healthy kid.
He doesn't have the gene.
Yeah, this was your kid whodidn't have those markers.
No, did not have the gene, youknow.
So that was just once again onmy knees, stunned, stunned.

(23:08):
And my husband had just boardeda 15-hour flight from Mumbai and
he had been over there on amission trip.
I had Max in Guatemala and wehad changed his name, so we had
to get him a new visa.
So we had an appointment at theembassy but I couldn't take him
out of the country.
So I left the next morning andleft him with a friend and

(23:30):
headed back to Colorado andSlate was in the hospital in
Greeley and they were taken off280,000 white cells.
It just, it was just a horrificscene.
And Isabelle was just devastatedand she'd been sick, she'd had
pneumonia at Liberty and it wasa mess.
So she's like, "Mom, I have tocome home, I can't stay here if
he's sick Cause.
That's just what we do.
We kind of the circumstanceswe've lived through.
So my sister went to get Isabeland brought her back and Slate

(23:51):
was in the hospital and Isabelthat week kind of stayed away
because he didn't have any whitecells and she didn't feel good
at all.
So I finally took her to thedoctor later in the week and
they did a blood test and thenshe had a nosebleed that
wouldn't stop and she didn'thave any platelets and so they
diagnosed her with leukemia aweek to the day after Slate.

(24:11):
So you know, that's justunheard of.
I just thought it had to be amistake.
So I had her on one side of thehall and him on the other side
of the hall and no time toreally ponder what was happening
, because I know you got to jumpin and gird your loins and you
got to have your mom face on andpay attention, because you're
hearing so many things and it'sjust a lot, so digesting all

(24:34):
that.
And Slate had started chemo bythis time and it's a 30-day
treatment, a very, veryintensive chemo, and at the end
of the 30 days Slate had goneinto remission, I said.
But he had to have chemo forthree and a half years.
Good news, bad news.
So he had to drop out of lawschool that year and he did ugly
chemo for a year.

(24:55):
But then he went on to finishlaw school and met his wife
along the way, which is a Godthing completely.
And now they live in WashingtonDC and they just had their
first baby girl.
So, being a grandma, I justcan't even believe it.
God is faithful.

(25:26):
So, Isabelle, she did the sametreatment for 30 days and she
did not go into remission.
So she continued other chemoand then she did a CAR T cell
transplant and some otherdifferent things and went into
remission and then the nextsummer got to go and work at
summer camps that she loved andteach kids and had a great time
that summer.
It was amazing to watch herdoing so well and him doing well

(25:49):
and we were doing it.
And then in October that yearhe came back with a vengeance
and since she had failed thechemo, they had to do a bone
marrow transplant.
So she did the transplantOctober, beginning of October,
and was in the hospital 38 dayswith that and they bring you
down to nothing and it was somuch pain and suffering and I'd
always wondered if I should havedone that with hope, you know,

(26:11):
and made her do it or justreally encouraged her to do that
.
And after watching this, no way.
It was the most inhumane thing.
She had sores from the tip ofher tongue through her whole
intestines to her tail.
The pain and the suffering wasunbelievable.
And she got through it and sherang the bell and we went next
door at the beginning ofNovember, I guess, to stay at a

(26:32):
house right by the hospital andwe went back the next day for
platelets and they did her pullsocks.
It was like 86.
And they're like do you feellike you can breathe?
She's like my shoes feel heavy.
She had on these big Niketennis shoes, these high tops.
So she was just up, her shoeswere heavy and moved her.
They admitted her onto thefloor and pretty soon.
They just weren't liking how itwas going.

(26:54):
So they moved her down to theICU pretty quick that night and
then they needed to intubate herthat night and so she crawled
up on that table and she said,"Mom, I will do this for you,
I'm ready to go home.
So she leaned back and shelooked at her doctor and she
said Jeff, do you know Jesus,because he's got the tube here,
he's going to intubate her.
"Yes, Isabelle, I do so.

(27:17):
She had a faith that wasadmirable for me.
I am blessed by their faith inthe Lord.
So she was intubated and onlife support for 76 days and
then, on February 21st of 2020,she passed away.
You know, and she was my bestfriend, she was my right arm in
this ministry.
She was my husband calls herher mini-me.

(27:38):
You know, she was just so muchfun and we miss her every day.
But I know that one of thesedays we're going to all be
together again and I just pourmyself into House of Hope
wholeheartedly daily, becauseeach time we see one of these
little kids come into our careand we can love them and clean
them up and nurture them andheal them and prepare them to

(28:01):
find their forever family andteach them the love of Jesus, it
just helps to put my heart backtogether, one piece at a time.
We've had 173 kids now throughHouse of Hope and right now we
have 23 and our oldest is six.
So we do littles, yeah, we havea lot of babies, yeah, but it's
just this beautiful place.
House of Hope is just thishaven that.

(28:23):
It's just not what you think asan orphanage.
You know, it kind of looks likePinterest threw up.
Of course it does, but yeah,it's like little red and white
barns and different buildingsand it's so funny.
Today our six-year-old hadcourt and the psychologist.
He's been with us for threeyears, three and a half years,

(28:44):
we've had him forever and wejust didn't think there was any
family.
And they found grandparents.
And they came today and thepsychologist asked Gustavo, I
know it's a big day.
Every day it seems likesomething amazing like this
happens.
God is faithful.
Anyway, this psychologist askedGustavo if he wanted to live in
the orphanage or if he wantedto live with his grandparents.

(29:06):
He said, "I don't live in anorphanage, I just have a house.
We live together.

Erin (29:10):
God so beautiful.

Diane (29:11):
He doesn't know he lives in an orphanage.
He doesn't know he lives in anorphanage.
I'm like, darn right, we don'tuse that word.
This is our home and we lovethese kids with all we got.
It's a big family.
And his words today were socomforting to my heart, because
I don't want those kids to feellike they are less than and that
they're not wanted, and we'vetried so hard to make them feel

(29:33):
like ours.
And having that kid say thattoday, I'm like that just was a
kiss from the Lord.
What an extraordinary gift.
It's good, it's good stuff.
And so then we also have FincaIsabel.
We opened about five years agoor more than that now Wow Seven.
And so we have a farm out inthe country that we named after
her and we use it fordiscipleship and camps and

(29:54):
different things, and then wealso grow coffee and vegetables,
and kids just need to beoutside.
I'm from Kansas, indeed, yeah,yeah.

Erin (30:03):
You're talking to two farm girls here, so we get it.

Diane (30:06):
Exactly, it's just good.
It's just good stuff to haveyour hands in the dirt and they
help pick things and they loveit out there.
And then we do the loom projectalso, which is stems back to
the ladies I met when we did themedical clinics and I just we
opened this orphanage and I'mlike didn't want to leave them
hanging.
You know, I hate to say I'llpray for you and then I walk off
and I just felt like the Lordput that on my heart, Although I

(30:27):
was like not really wanting torun another business I really
wasn't.
I'm like, Lord, I'm very happywith my orphans, but they're
sisters in Christ, they love theLord and they are the poorest
people I know.
So we've done life together along time and so they weave on
their back looms and so we makeproducts and bring them back to
the States and go to differentcraft fairs and whatnot.

(30:50):
So it's a good business forthem.
It helps put food on the tableand it helps give medicine for
their kids.
And I just love women.
Helping women and that's what Ilove so much about Supper
Solutions is I felt like all ouremployees were juggling 16
things and everybody had kidsand it was just one of those
seasons of let's just all do alittle bit and then we can all
do our kids and it's like that,you know, you just love these

(31:13):
women and it's a cool thing whenthe church is the church.
So that's my story.

Erin (31:18):
Wow, diane, thank you first and foremost for walking
us through that and sharing that.
For as long as I've known youand I worked at Supper Solutions
for you and I was working thereactually when Hope died, and so
I remember walking through that, but there's so much to your

(31:41):
story that you just shared thatI did not know, about you and
your history and your family.
So thank you for that.
It's so beautiful.
I have several questions.
You are such an extraordinaryhuman being.
You are.

Diane (31:56):
When people say that I just am like it is not pretty
over here and it's 100% Jesus,let me tell you I know and I
know that that is how you feeland your belief is extraordinary
.

Erin (32:11):
But from the outside, looking in and observing you and
your family and your work andthe path that you have walked
because you've had to, but, likeKellie referenced in the
beginning, your strength andyour resilience and the love
that you continue to just pourout is extraordinary and, I

(32:34):
would also venture to say,pretty unique.
I think that to be able toexperience all that life has
thrown at you and still be ableto get out of bed every day and
put one foot in front of theother and continue to do your
extraordinary work and tocontinue to show others and to

(32:56):
be an example is, it's just sucha beautiful thing.
I have so much respect andadmiration for you.
My first question, if we can goall the way kind of back to the
beginning, kind of back to thebeginning is when you moved from

(33:16):
Estes Park down to Fort Collins, colorado, did you have family
there?
And is Fort Collins whereTravis and Justin and their
family was from?
Because you mentioned you hadfamily just down the street.
I would love to know a littlebit more about the family that
was around you and the familythat was present and walked
through some of this with you.

(33:38):
If you could just shed a littlebit of light into kind of your
support system through that time.

Diane (33:43):
Sure, we moved in 99 from Kansas City out to Colorado.
I'd always wanted to live theresince I was a kid.
They're from Western Kansas andyou know how that is.
You always have it close to you.
So I'd wanted to do thatforever and my husband got an
opportunity for a job out there.
So we went to Estes to live fora year to just kind of look all
over the front range aboutwhere I live.

(34:04):
And no, we had no family outthere.
But God had a plan because wewere out there for about a year
and then Justin moved out fromKansas City because with
Travis's illness it took avillage, you know, and Justin
was a pretty big part of all ofhis treatment, and Justin would
fly from Kansas City down toHouston.
We were living in Kansas so wewould drive down and take the

(34:24):
kids.
And then a few years later Iconned my in-laws into moving
out there.
They were leaving one time togo back to Kansas and Hope was
running down the street afterthem.
I'm like, yep, it worked.
So they came and I picked ahouse out right down the block
from me.
I'm like I love, I have thegreatest in-laws.
My mother-in-law is one of mybest friends and I just look

(34:46):
back on the goodness of God andthat she loved me so much like a
daughter she still does.
But having their support rightdown the street for my kids,
even though we were in this bigtown, could ride their bikes
down to grandma's around thecorner.
That was a cool way to do thislife where we had to very much
team everything with Travis'schemo and the trips from school

(35:08):
and we were running to Houstonevery flip stitch.
And family is so important.
My mom and dad live in Kansas,but my mom would come out and
stay for a month or somethingwhen Hope was sick and just to
be there.
So just that's.
Another thing that I'm sograteful for is the support I
had of family.
I don't know how these peopledo it without the Lord and I
don't know how they do itwithout family, because I've got

(35:29):
a great one, and I don't knowhow they do it without family,
because I've got a great one.
I'm so grateful for them.
So that is one of the reasons.
I mean, we've seen the impactand the need for family over the
years.
And then you move to Guatemalaand people live with their
parents until they grow up andget married.
It's very cultural here and sowe actually adopted two
daughters two years ago just twomore.
We were just one more at a timeago just two more.

(35:52):
We were just one more at a time.
But Norma, she was in the sameorphanage where Max was, when
they were babies together, andit took me a decade to get her
declared adoptable and get herout of there.
It just was a terrible case.
So we got to adopt her a yearand a half ago, and then Norby,
the same time.
We'd known her since about well, the first year.
We moved there, 2012.
And she's 27 now.
But no, family and life is hardwhen you're by yourself, and

(36:14):
we've loved her.
We asked her when she was 16 ifshe wanted to be a Herman, so
she thought about it and weasked her another decade and I'm
like we're still here and soshe said yes, and so she lives
with us here in Guatemala andit's just a family man.
It's been a huge impact on mylife and just you know, would it
be easier to not do any of this?
Yes, it would, but you know, Ifeel like I'm here for a reason.

(36:35):
I might as well make it count.

Kellie (36:37):
To me, you are the epitome and your family is the
epitome of living out yourlegacy while you're alive, and I
hear that in the way Travislived, the way Hope lived in her
very short little life, the waythat Izzy lived, and it's what
you're doing as a family.

(36:58):
There's so much loneliness thatcomes through life and loss, and
we could spend a lot of timeunpacking all the layers that
are part of your story, but thefoundational aspect of family I
find really, really powerful.
So I would like to unpack alittle bit, because you have

(37:19):
such a unique situation withTravis and his brother, justin,
who is now your husband, and thelife that the two of you have
built and the nuclear familythat you were able to create is
such a unique and beautifulstory.
I know that people probablyhave a lot of questions about

(37:39):
that, and I was listening to youdescribe the relationship with
your mother-in-law, who is yourbest friend, and what an
incredible experience for her aswell.
I mean, you've all navigatedthis so beautifully together,
but she got to get you as adaughter-in-law twice.
I know it's crazy.

Diane (38:01):
And that's the thing too.
It's like I didn't want my kidsto have a different last name.
And it's not perfect, you know,nothing is, and I know it
wouldn't be, but I knew thatwhen push came to shove he would
have my back, you know, and hewould die for my kids.
I mean, the first year of ourmarriage, I think, he spent the
night on the hospital floorabout 77 nights, you know and

(38:23):
helped catch the puke.
That's just unheard of, youknow, when I knew you have to be
pretty tough to be my husband,because life is not easy, but he
, you know, didn't even miss abeat.

Erin (38:35):
Well, I'm sure for him too , like I mean those were his
nieces and nephew you know thosewere his brother's kids and
ultimately for Justin, I meanthose kids were his connection
to his brother, so I know heloved them unconditionally from

(38:55):
the moment each of them cameinto the world.

Diane (38:57):
Yeah, and he helped so much when they were young,
taught Isabella how to ride abike while Travis sat on the
porch, you know.
And Slate is the spinning imageof his dad and I mean Slate and
Justin are so tight.
It's just a gift.
Slate is a gift to our wholefamily in that he just reminds
them every day.
I mean his mannerisms, it'sjust uncanny, and his

(39:18):
personality and his humor andthings he says.
I mean my mother-in-law juststares at him.
That's another kiss from theLord.
It's a good thing.
I mean it's been 20 years nowwe're almost on 20 years of
marriage.
I mean it's been 20 years now,we're almost on 20 years of
marriage.
Can you believe that?

Erin (39:32):
Wow, no.

Diane (39:33):
I know.

Kellie (39:40):
I think it's so beautiful how the two of you
built a new chapter whilehonoring the past, staying very
grounded in the present andconstantly looking forward to
the future with faith and beliefand resilience and hope.
It's a beautiful story, thankyou, it really is.
And then to have made thatcommitment that you were going
to live this next chaptertogether right and create this

(40:04):
new nucleus right Of a family,and then to have hope's
diagnosis right after that.

Diane (40:10):
Yeah, just shocking.
And like Justin knew all thestories so he's able to keep his
brother alive to my kids theirwhole lives.
When Isabel was little, youknow, we were out at a clinical
trial in LA at UCLA and Traviswas so sick and the kids were
there and Justin came out andbrought the kids and we got
tickets from a nurse to go toDisney World or Disneyland or

(40:30):
whatever's out there and hecarried her on his shoulders.
Justin did, and the last minuteTravis was like I can't, so he
stayed back at the hotel whilewe took the kids.
And then, you know, years laterIsabel thinks that's her dad
that did that.
It carried her, you know.
So it's very much interestingwhat she remembered and I don't
know.
It was cool to be able to havehim tell so many stories over

(40:52):
the years.
It just helped keep Travis'smemory alive to our kids.
So it's just a gift.
It really was scary, make nomistake.
Who does that?

Kellie (41:02):
I can imagine that was really scary, as as both a woman
and a mom and a daughter-in-lawand a community member all the
roles that we play as women inthe world I'm sure that was
scary on many, many levels Forboth of us.

Diane (41:17):
I'm sure.
Yeah, yeah, serious role in thedice.
I'm not going to lie.

Kellie (41:23):
Right, this can go one way or another.

Diane (41:26):
I feel like that's what the Lord is telling me to do.

Erin (41:29):
And I would love to hear, on that, a little glimpse into
some of the conversation, ifyou're willing to share, that
you and Justin had about thatand what his perspective and his
take was, what his role was andwhat his new role was going to
be, and look like as to how hewalked through that as well.

Diane (41:50):
So interesting.
You know when we decided to dothis.
We go to like some jewelrystore in a mall looking fancy,
and it's cold in there.
It's like air conditioning andwe're looking at rings and I
look over and he is sweating.
I'm dying laughing.
Of course Isabel's with us.
Izzy was with you.
Oh yeah, yeah, we went on ourone date and Isabel was with us.
We went to Bassetti's in FortCollins.

(42:12):
That was our date, but, yeah,we were chaperoned by our
five-year-old.
So funny.
Yeah, it was super interestingand dynamic.
And when Slate's dad died, Ithink his childhood ended.
So he was 10, and he was withTravis a lot.
He would stay up at night withhim while I would work at the
store in the day and then Iwould have to sleep at night and

(42:33):
so I was in the house, butSlate laid on the couch while
Travis was in the chair.
Slate is an old soul andmatured very quickly.
He just has always been theolder brother that would measure
the girls' sleeves as they camedown the stairs to go to school
.
He's got three fingers.
Hilarious, yeah, fingers, yeah,total moral police in our house

(42:54):
.
So Slate didn't really getparented that much by him.
I mean he did when he had to,but it was an interesting
relationship, you know so, andthen he'd never have been around
girls much.
There was a lot to navigate.
So you know we did it, though Imean it was so hard then
because Hope was sick and I meanthe grief process was so
interesting because it just wedidn't really get to grieve Trav
anymore.
We had to gird our loins forhope and I don't know it was
just constantly.

(43:14):
You know how just you'restaying above water and treading
as fast as you can for a longtime.

Kellie (43:21):
Well, and for the two of you now entering into a new
relationship and navigating allof these new roles in the same
family.
But now we have a new structureto our family and on the heels
of that you decided that in May,got married in June and Hope's
diagnosis was in July.

(43:42):
Is that correct?
It was just boom, boom, boomRight.

Diane (43:44):
We had like a month, a month of like being normal,
because even our whole life withTrav we were like three month
increments, because if he waswell he would get tested, if he
was really really well he wouldevery three months do scans.
So we lived to learn to livelife and not plan more than
three months at a time.
You know it, just that's whatyou do.
And then if you got a cleanbill of health for three months,

(44:05):
man, you just run like thunderand enjoy every minute.
So the rug got ripped out fromunder me.
You know, multiple times, everytime he got sick, our whole life
would change and the bottomwould drop out and we would
readjust and do all that.
So he knew very much that styleof living.
But we had that one month afterwe got married.
I'm like, wow, this is whatit's like.

(44:25):
We could like plan a vacationat Christmas, and you know, and
then it didn't last at Christmas, and you know, and then it
didn't last.
But it was an interestingfeeling to be normal for a hot
minute, whatever that is.
That was the end of thatnormalcy stuff.

Kellie (44:37):
And really, what is normal?
When we talk about life andlove, normal is different for
every single person in any givenplace in any given moment of
time.
We had some pre-episodeconversation about all that's
happening in our lives andbecoming grandmas and having
adult children, which is reallyweird because we're holding firm

(45:00):
to 29 and now they'resurpassing us in age.
You know, life is just such anincredible journey and really
what is normal?
I think it's a great questionthat we all pose.
We've all had traumas, majorlife experiences and this
opportunity to talk about themfrom a place of raw

(45:24):
vulnerability, to explore themeaning and the magic of those
experiences, so that we can helpother people understand that,
whatever path you are on, thatis your normal.
Embrace it, be faithful andstrong in it, learn from it.
And how can you create memoriesand what can you leave behind

(45:46):
in your wake?

Diane (45:47):
Absolutely.
The legacy is the key for me.

Kellie (46:13):
I would love to hear more about that concept from you
, Diane, what legacy reallymeans to you, given everything
that we've talked about?

Diane (46:16):
You know I'm really referring mostly to this
ministry and these kids andGuatemala and setting up things
that will be impactful longafter I'm gone, and that's why
we're doing the coffee businessand different ways to support
the children's home.
And getting staff lined out,getting assets lined out, just
making the way, thinking verylong-term, next generation and

(46:38):
having an impact for the kingdomis what my legacy I want to be
about.

Kellie (46:42):
Well, you are certainly doing that.

Erin (46:44):
Yes, you are.

Diane (46:45):
I'm not doing it alone.

Erin (46:46):
No, you are not.

Diane (46:47):
We know that it takes an army for sure I have a great
team, but it's cool.
I have a lot of awesome peoplein my world that God has brought
miraculously in my path, sothere's no mistake that I know
that we're created for such atime as this and this purpose is
great that he has, and he hasbrought people that know way
more than I do on many, manythings and drops them in my lap,

(47:11):
and it's just pretty cool to beable to watch who he's going to
bring next to my doorstep.
That's really incredible.

Erin (47:18):
I would like to take a little bit deeper dive into and
transition from, you know, thisdiscussion about Travis and
Justin and Hope and her shortbut beautiful life.
I would love to hear Dianepersonally how differently it is

(47:39):
to experience the loss of aspouse and the loss of a child,
and what that grief looked likeand how it was different and the
effect that it had on yourfaith.

Diane (47:52):
Sure, I think when you lose the love of your life
there's many different thingsyou feel there's heartbreak and
there's devastation, but thenyou can kind of stuff that down
for a while because of theconcern of driving the train by
yourself kind of overtakes yourheartbreak.
I think there's so much for meenergy into figuring out how I'm
going to feed these kids anddoing the whole show which I

(48:15):
didn't have to because myin-laws were there to help with
carpool and do some of that.
But at night when the heads hitthe pillow, you can take off
that mom mask a little bit.
I think that's when I had timeto grieve my husband and I tried
not to cry unless I was in theshower.
So I cried in the shower for ayear, I think.
I mean I wasn't hiding my grief.

(48:36):
But I think it's so importantwith your kids to give them the
feeling that you're okay.

Erin (48:41):
That is getting the rug ripped out from them and I don't
think it's fair to kids whenmom shuts down and I've seen it,
I've had friends do it and it'snot good and then the impact is
long lasting on these kids.
And it wasn't fair that my kidshad to lose their dad and I'm
like they can't lose their momtoo.
So, with that being said, notthe fear of doing it all, but

(49:05):
just doing it and keeping upwith all the balls, is something
you feel a lot of when you'resingle.
Suddenly, then, when you lose achild, it is such a different
thing.
It's a different morning,because you can feel like you
dropped the ball.
You didn't do everything youcould.
I tried everything I could forthat girl.
Well, for both of them, and Ithink that's where the Lord

(49:26):
comes in the faith.
Because I think that is justsuch a trap from Satan to think
that we have all the power andthat we are powerful enough that
it's our fault, because that'sjust not the reality.
But as a mother I think you feellike that responsibility it's
my responsibility and then yougrieve for the things that you
won't get to see, you won't getto do.

(49:46):
I think one of the hardest dayswas when I went through all
their boxes in the basement ofthe girls' preschool letters and
all that and I just threw itaway because no one's going to
want that.
That was hard, that was thehardest thing and I have a lot
of their stuff left as far aslike to remember things by, but
the things that you had hopesand dreams for their future how

(50:07):
did I just give them to the Lordand let them go?
You know, because having themthere, just it wasn't a good
thing for me.
It held me back on looking tothe future.
It was so painful and I mean Istill have a box of Isabel's
stuff in the basement.
But now I have Norma and youknow I have other girls and
stuff in my life that might wantsome of those things, but
that's different than herdrawings from preschool and

(50:29):
those types of things.
But one of the most valuablethings I have is Isabel's Bible
and I didn't even know what itwas like until she passed away
and I started going through itand the notes and the markings
in that Bible made mine looklike a new Bible, like she was
in the Word and that was such agift to me to have a Bible and I

(50:51):
still use it and it's soencouraging because it has all
her notes and her letters to theLord and it just reminds me
that I've got a kid in DC, threein Guatemala and two in heaven.
And that's how I look at it,because that's just how it is to
me.
So I try not to dwell too muchon the loss of the child, but
the pause in the relationship.

Kellie (51:10):
Yeah, and we heal inside of that space.
Are there ways that Travis,hope and Izzy show up in your
world now?

Diane (51:20):
Oh, all the time, all the time.
Especially Slate being anepitome of his dad is just a
cool thing.
And then seeing Hope she's onthe wall at House of Hope and to
know that she's truly thebeautiful mashes story and what
her life and her death has meantfor the impact for all eternity
has to give me comfort.

(51:41):
It was not for nothing andpeople have come to know the
Lord because of her story andthat has been a gift to my heart
.
And Isabel just was.
I don't know if it was differentbecause she was 19 or what, but
I think of her just every day.
She was such a huge part of mylife and even though she moved
to New York, I think we talkedmore than most people whose
girls live in their basementLike she would call me on every

(52:02):
morning on the way on her subwayride in and you know we just
had a lot of communication andthen all the times taking her to
ballet in Guatemala City.
That is forward traffic.
You know that windshield timewas so valuable and I was her
person.
You know it was a really coolrelationship that we had that I
just have to think that so manyof my friends have kids that are

(52:23):
estranged and have walked awayand you know, I'm so grateful.
I'm grateful for the 19 years Ihad with Isabel, because they
were gold and even just 11 withhope Wow.
Their impact is long living andI've got two of my kids tucked
away in the heaven of the Lordand I'm like I'm sorry for
people whose kids have walkedaway and they have to have that

(52:44):
constant turmoil in their heart,worried about eternity for
their kids.
I am not that person, so it'sperspective, perspective on how
you look at things.
There's always someone worseoff than me, always.

Kellie (52:55):
We talk about that a lot on this podcast, both
perspective and gratitude, andthat's what I heard in what you
just shared, because perspectivereally does help us grieve,
especially when grief isn'tlinear it's different for
everybody.
Help us grieve especially whengrief isn't linear it's
different for everybody andbringing light to these

(53:16):
conversations around loss in away that allows us to understand
or capture, hold on to aperspective that we may not have
seen or understood or eventhought about before, and so I
love how you shared that.
I also think it's reallyfascinating, Diane, that
everything that you have beenthrough with Travis and with the

(53:39):
kids, your journey in Coloradoand I'm so grateful for the
connection that we all had whileyou were here and then taking
that to Guatemala and being ableto identify with, counsel, walk
alongside, nurture, love, thesechildren and these women who

(54:00):
have experienced unbelievableloss in their own right, in
their own lives, and how thosetwo worlds have come together is
really remarkable to me.

Diane (54:09):
It's been an amazing thing to watch the Lord bring
women in my path who've lostkids.
Here.
It doesn't matter where you'refrom, it doesn't matter if your
floor is dirt, it doesn't matterif your kids had the best care
in the whole United States forcancer.
You know what?
Kids die still and mother'shearts are broken and there's
nothing that can speak toanother woman who's lost a child

(54:30):
like a woman who's lost a child.
There's nothing that can speakto another woman who's lost a
child like a woman who's lost achild.
So it's been impactful here tobe able to do that
cross-culturally.
And the suffering here is somuch worse physically and these
kids that come to us and thethings they've been through and
it's just unspeakable thingshave happened to them and it

(54:50):
helps my perspective to rememberhow much I have to be grateful
for.

Erin (54:52):
For sure.
Diane, will you share with usand our listeners the journey of
the simultaneous diagnosis ofSlate and Isabelle, one week
apart.
I remember when this happenedand the shock and the thoughts
and the feelings of overwhelmfor me from the outside, looking

(55:16):
in like how, why, theunfairness of all of it.
I would love some insight intothe relationship between Slate
and Isabel during that time assiblings right, I think about,
obviously, Kellie and I assisters, but the two of them

(55:38):
being the ages that they were.
I would love to hear a littlebit from you about what it was
like, not only for you butreally for the two of them,
walking this cancer journey sideby side, as siblings, across
the hall from each other.
Sure.

Diane (55:56):
You know, they hadn't lived together since Isabel was
about 13.
So Slate moved away and went tocollege, you know, when she was
in Guatemala, and so they were,you know, friends and had grown
up together and whatnot.
But when they were bothdiagnosed.
I've always tried hard to focuson the positive and that was
one of the most amazing things.
That was so cool because ourwhole family came together again

(56:18):
because we lived apart for adecade.
So moving Slate back in andthey were just best friends and
it was such a precious season tobe together.
And those first 30 days of theirtreatment was such a train
wreck.
I cannot even tell you.
And you know, I think God, whenyou come to the end of yourself

(56:39):
, you get really used to justhanging on to the Lord, and
that's definitely where I waswalking at that point and he
gives me about enough to getthrough half a day at a time.
So I'm like half a day, half aday, you know, let's get through
the next few hours.
That's how much was coming atday at a time.
So I'm like half a day, half aday, you know, let's get through
the next few hours.
That's how much was coming atus at a fire hose level.
So we didn't have a place tolive.
We'd sold everything and movedto Guatemala, didn't have a

(57:00):
house, didn't have a car, didn'thave a couch, didn't have a bed
.
So not only was this diagnosisso insane, it just is
unbelievable.
So we moved into my in-lawsbasement who I love and we put
two church tables in theirdining room and they were
covered with medicine.
So, yeah, we had to just take.
And I put all their meds on anExcel spreadsheet because it was

(57:23):
so difficult to monitor all ofthem and we had them lined up in
rows of types of medicines anda lot of them were like not take
this, at 9, 12, and 6.
It was like, if this happens,take this, if this happens, take
this.
And we had to watch them both,for Slate had high blood
pressure, isabel had diabetes.
This is all because of thechemo.

(57:43):
It was a train wreck, symphonyof symptoms.
So that's kind of my forte is.
What I've had in my backgroundis a lot of medical, and then
doing all the medical missionwork in Guatemala, I just
learned way more about drugs.
And then, with HOPE's diagnosistoo, they give you so much
responsibility as a parent witha child.

(58:04):
So I did her chemo at home andso I knew the drill a lot.
But they both were on hugedoses of prednisone.
So they ate.
This is my ballerina.
And Slate, who was 6'4 andgained four pounds in college.
I mean he was 165 pounds,soaking wet and just the
skinniest people, and they couldeat the most unbelievable

(58:26):
amount of food at one sitting.
They'd go through a dozen eggsat breakfast.
I mean it was like a footballteam.
So my father-in-law would runto the grocery store multiple
times a day and they would eatthis insane amount of food and
it was just you had to laugh orcry because it was unbelievable.
And so they really got intothat and cooking.
And then Slade decided, if hehad to take a year off law

(58:46):
school, that he wanted to becomea chef.
So he just was obsessed withGordon Ramsay videos and did all
the research and so he cookedall the time and she, you know
they did a lot together and Ihave such fond memories which
sounds insane, but fond memoriesof that year of just joy.
And you know, I think that isjust because happiness comes

(59:08):
from circumstances and joy comesfrom within and joy was
palpable in that house, you know, and it wasn't always pretty
and we'd have to go to chemoevery week in Denver and it was
always forever.
And then they were both so inpain and driving home and they
were short tempers.
It was just so unlike eitherone of them and again my husband
had to just suck up and takethe brunt of all that.

(59:31):
But no, I mean, I remember thatseason with fondness.
It sounds crazy, you know.
And plus, I'm trying to run theorphanage via WhatsApp and Zoom,
and I had a lot on my plate,you know, but God is faithful to
give you what you need at thetime.
But I've got great kids, man,and they were fun, and Slate is
just his dad and he is anencourager and he is happy and

(59:54):
joyful and thinks of others.
You know, and never hurts tohave somebody in the house like
that, and my in-laws just wereso helpful and wanted to, you
know, do everything and thatthey could, so just a family
affair man.
But then we got to my house andmove in there and we have Max,
you know, little peanut, and hejust adored Isabel, so he would
just lay in her bed.

(01:00:15):
Every day I'd pick him up fromschool and I just basically do
the Monsters Inc thing and givehim a bath and sanitize him
before he could see the kids,and we just did it.
You know, it's an interestingjourney this life.

Kellie (01:00:27):
Erin, after our episode with Gini, we talked about grief
and gratitude coexisting in thegratitude practice that her mom
would do with her when she hadher Eeyore days.
And I was sharing that andhaving a conversation about it
with Marcus the other day and hesaid, wow, to me that is the
epitome of joy.
I think that's what Iexperienced when my dad died

(01:00:51):
Gratitude was coexisting at thesame time as grief, and the
coming together of that was justpure joy.
That was all I was feeling andexperiencing and, as you were
describing that, Diane, I don'tknow how to describe how
wonderful it was.
There was so much gratitude,having all the family together,
the children interacting, thedynamics, as difficult as it was

(01:01:14):
.
I heard grief and gratitudecoexisting and I heard you
express that as joy.
I think that's really beautiful.

Erin (01:01:21):
That is really beautiful.

Diane (01:01:22):
Yeah, there was a lot, a lot of good times there.

Erin (01:01:25):
Well, and in the face of such tragedy, you have to focus.
You don't have to.
It's a choice, right, but youguys chose to focus on the good
and the making memories andfinding those moments that we're
going to get you through to thenext hour of the day, the next
half of the day.

(01:01:45):
That is really beautiful.
I did write down what you saidbecause it resonated with me
that happiness comes fromcircumstances and joy comes from
within.
So, Kellie, thanks for bringingthat full circle.
That was a really beautifulthing.
Remind me, Diane, how old Slateand Izzy were when they were

(01:02:26):
diagnosed.
.
.

Diane (01:02:26):
18 and 24

Erin (01:02:26):
and did they find comfort in each other?

Diane (01:02:27):
Oh, absolutely!

Erin (01:02:28):
.
.
.
and obviously being able torelate to each other in such a
profound way that very fewsiblings would get to
experience, right, walking thatroad simultaneously.

Diane (01:02:40):
They spent a ton of time together and Slate, when he was
diagnosed before Isabelle was,he just told me, "I thought I
was going to get to take thisone.
He thought he was going to bethe one to do it instead of her
and I don't know if he got sickso that she would have that
season with him.
It doesn't make any sense.
I'm not going to ask the Lordwhy in a bad way, I just want to
know what that was about.

(01:03:01):
Was that so that she would haveabsolute soulmate in the
journey?
Sure, I feel like that's whatthey were.
It was a cool season in a lotof ways.

Erin (01:03:09):
I would love to know how Slate navigated the loss of both
of his little sisters and whatthat has looked like for him in
his life now having lost both ofhis younger sisters

Kellie (01:03:23):
and now becoming a dad

Erin (01:03:25):
to a little girl.

Diane (01:03:27):
It was interesting when he, you know, he was always that
father figure to both of themand so I think he felt I don't
know if it was really guilty butjust so devastated that he
couldn't stop it, just like Ifelt, and he was really close
with his sisters.
I think that's why I mean,that's what happens when your
dad is sick, I think.
But it was interesting when hiswife got pregnant recently.

(01:03:48):
Wife got pregnant recently andthey found out it was a girl and
he was.
So he totally said I wanted aboy.
I'm like, "don't say that he'slike mom, not for real, like
normal reasons.
I just know they're gonna lookjust like one of my sisters.
My heart can't take it.
That killed me.
And I mean they gave birth to ablonde haired, blue eyed girl,

(01:04:12):
just like his sister, and shelooks so much like Isabel.
It's an interesting journey but, yeah, he wanted to guard his
heart because he knows, you know, and I think everything changes
when you have your own childand you've watched something
happen like this and you're justlike that's unbelievable.
So you just have to learn totrust the Lord even more when
you have kids, don't you?

Kellie (01:04:31):
Yes, there is so much that is out of your control.

Diane (01:04:34):
Oh my word.

Kellie (01:04:35):
And none of them come with an owner's manual.

Diane (01:04:37):
For sure None of them follow the same
instructions either.

Erin (01:04:42):
I would love for us to connect with Slate.

Diane (01:04:45):
Oh, he's awesome.
He would totally do it andcontinue that conversation.
It's a great idea.

Kellie (01:04:49):
It'd be a great part two of this conversation today.

Diane (01:04:53):
Awesome, yeah, it would.

Erin (01:04:54):
That'd be really extraordinary.
Again, like I told you before,you speak so beautifully and so
eloquently about your journeyand about these losses and I
just I thank you, I really thankyou for sharing so much of your
heart.

Diane (01:05:14):
It's an honor.
Thanks for wanting to reach out.
I appreciate it.

Erin (01:05:18):
You know so much of what we're doing here right and
talking about life and love andloss and legacy, and when Kellie
and I had this vision of thispodcast and what we wanted to do
and thinking about who wewanted to talk to, you hit the
top of our lists independently,individually, without

(01:05:41):
conversation.
It warms my heart that you wereopen and willing, and so I just
want to thank you so much.

Diane (01:05:49):
You're welcome.
think, too, because of our ownjourney, we have prioritized
and I think it's just who we areas human beings some of the
losses and traumas that we hadin our early childhood having a
mother who was diagnosed withcancer when we were very young
Erin was just four or five yearsold and I really became quite

(01:06:11):
the caretaker as a teenager andthen everything that's
transpired in our lives sincethen.
We wanted this to actuallyDiane, be a place of hope and
healing.
We wanted the PIG to reflectwhat we know is possible through
navigating this journey, havinga strong faith and belief

(01:06:31):
system, doing it in connectionand community with other people
and just bringing that to theforefront so we could have
conversations about loss andgrief and loss in all of its
forms.
It's not just death.
It's so many things that we canlose while we're living that we
don't necessarily alwaysrecognize or acknowledge as a

(01:06:53):
loss.
But they come with their ownunique set of circumstances,
their own aspects of grief, andnavigating that by ourselves or
with other people creates thisliving legacy and who we are and
who people remember us as,because the one thing we know

(01:07:14):
with certainty is that none ofus make it out of this alive.
We all eventually go home.
One thing that I would reallylike to do as we close today's
conversation is celebrate you asa mother.
We're recording this episode 12days before Mother's Day, and

(01:07:34):
you are the epitome of what itmeans to be a mom.
You have walked so manydifferent journeys as a mother,
and your mothering does not stopwith the children that you
brought into the world and twothat you've ushered out, but all
of these children that you arecaring for and nurturing and

(01:07:58):
loving and helping find homesthree in your own home, in a
different country, in adifferent part of the world I
think that that really deservesto be celebrated and honored,
and so this Mother's Day, I'mholding an extra special place
in my heart for you, because youreally deserve it.
Thank you so much.
It is an honor.
I enjoy everything that I getto do with these kids.

Kellie (01:08:21):
And with that you just wrote a chapter for a book that
was recently published.

Diane (01:08:28):
I did.
It's called Mothers Like Me.
Yeah, my friend, Angie Green,put together a ministry called
"Mothers Like Me and it's formoms who have lost children, and
so she had each of us write achapter of her book.
So it's full of moms who havewalked the road of losing
children and it's an incrediblestory.
Group of stories that I amhonored to be a part of.
That as well.
Group of stories that I amhonored to be a part of that as

(01:08:50):
well.

Kellie (01:08:51):
Well, we will put links in the show notes and on the
website for House of Hope, theLum Project, mothers Like Me,
and anything else that you wantus to include.
We'll include all of that.
.
.

Diane (01:09:02):
Wonderful.

Kellie (01:09:10):
And we encourage everybody to go, really take
some time and read and listenand support and help however you
can in your own way for theseincredible projects that you're
pouring your heart and soul into.

Diane (01:09:16):
Well, it's the key.
Getting through this life ispouring out to other people for
sure.
Well, great.

Erin (01:09:22):
Diane, if you could leave one message about living after
loss, what would it be?
key is spending time everymorning in the word drinking at
the well, whether it's fiveminutes or three hours, it will
change your day.
It changes who you are as a mom, it changes who you are as a
wife, and it's this power sourcethat has gotten me where I am

(01:09:45):
today, and I cannot say enoughabout the need to go there and
drink every morning.
I cannot say enough about theneed to go there and drink every
morning.
It's the greatest part of whatI learned in all of this loss is
to truly rely and to listenevery day to the Holy Spirit and
to be able to act on what theHoly Spirit puts in your heart
and how it guides you and leadsyou and gives you wisdom.

(01:10:05):
And I cannot say enough aboutthe time you spend in the Word
is the best investment.
Thank you for that.
Do you have any other finalthoughts or reflections or
anything that you would like toshare about your journey with
our listeners?

Diane (01:10:22):
I think so many people in the world are hurting and so
many people have really hardthings.
In fact, almost everybody hassome hard, just looks different.
So I think for me, lookingoutward,

Erin (01:10:33):
At the end of our interviews- what their PIG is,

(01:10:55):
and I would really love to hearfrom you.
But I'm going to give you alittle prompt, because I have
heard you use the wordperspective several times
throughout this conversation andit's been really eye-op opening
for me personally, it is reallyremarkable how the different

(01:11:17):
events of your life have shiftedyour perspective, and so I
don't know if perspective isyour P word or you can make it
that, but if you have anything,whether it's a P word, an I word
, a G word, two of the three,all three, whatever you would
like to share, we would love tohear it.

Diane (01:11:36):
You know for sure, perspective is a huge part and
one of the things I've heardonce that has stuck with me so
much over all these years is Ilive my life with a peculiar
passion and perspective thatonly death can bring.
And you know, that's where I am,because people don't understand
the decisions I make and thethings I do and look at me like

(01:11:57):
how are you doing that?
But I'm like you don'tunderstand where I've walked to
get to this place.
And you can't just learn thatwithout the suffering, because
God whispers in the good daysbut he screams with a megaphone
in the suffering and I've hadmegaphone in my ear for years
and that just changes who youare and the I would be impact.
I'm big on what I've seen andwho I've lost and how they've

(01:12:20):
gone forward and I better makethis life count because I'm
still here and legacy issomething I think about often.
And then my G would be grace,because I've had to ask for
grace so many times from theLord and I've had to give grace
along the way when I've beenhurting.
I think grace has a huge placein my heart and in my life.

Erin (01:12:40):
That is so beautiful Perspective, impact and grace.
Thank you.

Diane (01:12:46):
You're welcome.
Thanks for making me think.

Kellie (01:12:51):
I can't think of a better way to close our time
together today.
Diane, thank you so much forthe gift of who you are in this
world and the gift of your timeto share your story and spend
time with Erin and I today onthe PIG.
This was a powerfulconversation and we are deeply
grateful.
This was a powerfulconversation and we are deeply

(01:13:14):
grateful.
Perspective impact grace.
We invite you to sit withtoday's conversation to reflect
on your own story of life, love,loss and what legacy you're
building even in the midst of it.
To learn more about Diane's work, including House of Hope, the
Lum Project, gifts of Hope andher story in Mothers Like Me.

(01:13:35):
You'll find all the links anddetails in the show notes below.
And if this episode touchedyour heart, please share it with
someone who might need to hearit.
And since we couldn't be herewithout you, we invite you to
subscribe, leave a five-starrating and review and learn how
to join our growing community atthepigpodcastcom, because this

(01:13:56):
isn't just a podcast.
It's a place to be reminded.
Even in loss, hope truly doeslive on.

(01:14:17):
Until next time.
Hogs and kisses, everyone!