Does My Adult Child Still Love Me?

Does My Adult Child still love me? As a mom experiencing estrangement, it’s heartbreaking not to see signs of love from your adult child. You might wonder, Do they still care? In this episode, I’ll explore what love can look like during estrangement, why your child may be distant, and how to hold on to hope when you're not seeing any signs of connection. I’ll also share tips on maintaining unconditional love while focusing on your own healing and growth. You are not alone in this journey—let’s walk through it together with faith and hope. 

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Episode Transcript

(00:00):
Have you ever wondered if you'rea strange child loves you?
The silence can be deafening,but love doesn't always look
the way we expect, right?
We expect presence, which is ideal, ofcourse, but that's the number one question
I used to probe my daughter when she wasestranged from us why don't you love me?
And all it did was push her further away.

(00:21):
And so I want to share withyou some tips for that.
And I just want you to know thatyou as a mom have one job, and
that is to take care of you first.
So let's dive in.
Number one, love canexist even in silence.
I know that you are heartbroken and youare sad and you are confused about why
your adult child may be not speakingto you or at least not even speaking

(00:44):
to you on the terms that you used totalk, but their choice to pull away
may very well be more about theirown struggles, not a lack of love,
They're so consumed with theirown life right now and if
there's pain or hurt in there.
That's where the need for space comes in.
this is not always about a lack of love.

(01:05):
Number two is I want you to understandthe emotional distance because their
estrangement might be a way to processpain, not a rejection of you as a person.
And the thing is manyof our adult children.
Um, that I have seen is theywalk away, but they're not
really processing anything.
And so time is going by and we know it'svaluable but they might be struggling

(01:27):
with expressing love due to their ownunresolved issues or life pressures.
And so the problem comes in whenthey are idle and ignoring the
situation because it's easier.
Okay, so they have to reflectback on their own internal battle.
And that is on them that there's notabsolutely nothing you can do about that.

(01:49):
Absolutely nothing.
But if you are a mom ready to take thenext step and you have tried other things
and you're still struggling and lookingfor coaching, and you want to hear more
about my group coaching, my one on onecoaching package, all of those things,
I want you to book a discovery callwe're going to focus on, figuring out
exactly what you need for your journey.

(02:09):
But then I can share how my coaching canprovide that support you deserve as a
mom these are moms ready to prioritize.
if we have not talked before,feel free to book that call.
it will be in the pin comment aswell as in the description below.
So number three is lettinggo of immediate validation.
For some of you who have reachedout to your son or daughter,

(02:30):
you may not see the response.
You may not see the evidence of love.
You know, right now, butdoesn't mean it's gone.
And so that is such a hard concept.
trust me, I was thereright along with you.
I didn't understand it.
And it still doesn't make complete sense.
But you know what?
We're all on our own journey.
And you gave birth or you adoptedthese children, but their own

(02:54):
self care and their own personalgrowth is outward signs for them.
These are the things thatthey have to be doing.
their silence may be temporary asthey work through their own stuff.
And we know that, right?
So number four is important becauseI want you to remember that you
need to keep that door open.
Or as some of my clients willsay, keep that porch light on.

(03:16):
That is so important becausewe need to show consistent non
intrusive gestures of love.
Not like what I did.
Why don't you love me?
What did I do?
All of these things that is puttingpressure and pushing them away further.
Pressuring them for a responseand not respecting their need
for space is not the answer.
And I know, I don't want thisto be many years go by where

(03:37):
you're still sitting here going,okay, I haven't even reached out.
I haven't text.
That's not the case.
But when your adult child givesyou an absolute I need six months.
I need a year.
the reason they're saying that there'sso many reasons why they could be saying
that, but at the end of the day, thisis their choice to have a relationship
with us, even though we're mom, right?

(03:58):
But it's their choice to haverelationship with family members.
I just want you to remember that.
And I want you to know that youare not alone in this and this,
conversation will definitely continue.
So please leave your, comments I'dlove to hear from you in regards
to what you've been experiencing.
I hope to talk to you soon.
God bless.