How Moms react to NO CONTACT

When a child goes no contact, it leaves a deep, invisible wound that many moms silently carry. On the outside, life may seem fine—but inside, there’s a storm of grief, guilt, and unanswered questions. In this episode, I’m sharing what really happens to a mother’s heart when her adult child walks away without explanation. If you've ever smiled while your heart was breaking, or asked yourself why you can't just move on, this message is for you. We'll explore how moms react to no contact, why your feelings are valid even when others don’t understand, and the steps you can take to begin healing. You are not alone—and you don’t have to carry this pain in silence. 💛

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Episode Transcript

(00:00):
If you're a mom experiencing nocontact and everyone else is telling
you to just move on or be grateful,but your heart is still shattered,
this message is for you today.
Today I have four points I wanna sharewith you, so let's dive right in.

(00:21):
Number one is the brave face.
You know, a lot of you are trying to puton a brave face, which is trying to hide
your ache that you're experiencing andyou're continuing to show up for others.
you make dinner, you might go tochurch, you're attending events
and you're trying to smile, butbehind the smile, there's the grief.
And I know it's there because Italk to so many of you and I work

(00:42):
with so many of you and I was you.
I know it's exhausting, and mostmoms hide that pain because they're
tired of explaining something noone seems to understand, right?
So putting on that brave face, Iwant you to know that it's time to
stop dismissing your own feelings.
Now, I believe that we shouldn't chaseour feelings and feelings are fleeting

(01:06):
and we shouldn't make a lot of decisions.
Based off of how we're feeling inone certain moment, rather, I wanna
encourage you to create a spacewhere you can be real with yourself.
for some of you, some of youlove to journal and I think
that can be super powerful.
But also talking to someone that youtrust, not just anyone, because you feel

(01:27):
like you should talk to them in regards tothe situation or work with a coach, right?
Do what you need to do for you.
But healing is gonnastart when you're honest.
You have to start by beinghonest with yourself.
Number two
is gratitude.
Gratitude and grief.

(01:48):
You know, they can coexist together.
you might be saying to yourself,I have a really good life.
I should be okay.
I have all these other greatthings going on in my life.
maybe it's other children.
a great marriage.
your work or whatever it isthat's super fulfilling for you.
But your child's absence still hurtsdeep, and that can make you feel guilty.

(02:12):
Like your sadness is somehow a betrayalof the blessings that you have.
And so I want you to know that it'sokay to allow both truths to exist.
You can be grateful for your lifeand still grieve what's missing.
And because you're feeling this,it doesn't mean you're broken.
You're human, my friend, right?

(02:32):
It doesn't mean you're ungrateful.
It means you're a mom with a tender heart.
And like I said, you're human.
So some of you are feeling thisin-between, this stuckness and if you're
serious about moving towards peace, evenif the relationship is not restored yet.
I invite you to schedulea discovery call with me.

(02:53):
It's an opportunity for youand I to discuss what's going
on with your child and moreimportantly, how it's affecting you.
And that's what I wanna learnfrom you during that call.
It's a consultation.
It's not a coaching call.
Spots are limited, so please only sign upif you're ready to prioritize yourself.
if that's you, then you can go ahead andclick the link in the show notes below.

(03:22):
Number three is the hidden pain.
You know, the hidden painthat doesn't ever go away.
we all have some of thatin our world, right?
We all know what that feels like, andsometimes that hidden pain can come
through tears in those real quiet moments.
Ones days that are really moredifficult, like holidays or family
gatherings or maybe bedtime.

(03:44):
You go, go, go all day, and thenby the time you quiet yourself in
the evening, the pain just hits.
Sometimes the silence is too loudand you think maybe you've pushed it
down, but it always keeps coming back.
And that's because estrangementisn't just emotions, it's soul deep.
It really is.

(04:04):
so don't keep waiting for it to go away.
You have to let yourselffeel it on purpose.
So praying, movement, I mean walking,stretching, doing these things to
help you process your emotions.
Releasing that pain regularly beforeit becomes an identity for you.
I don't want that for you.

(04:26):
And number four is whyjust move on doesn't work.
Like I said, some of your loved onesmay be saying that, oh, just move on.
It's okay.
Just move on.
I don't believe in moving on.
I believe in moving forward.
People might tell you to focus on work.
Your other kids, your hobbies.
The ache doesn't listen to that.

(04:46):
Now we do need to do these things becausethe loss of your child's presence isn't
just a thing that happened, it redefinesyour whole reality, and you're not failing
if you feel this way, You're faithful tolove that, your daughter, your son, that

(05:08):
still exists even though there's silence.
So instead of trying to move on, Iwant you to start moving forward.
That healing can be possible for youwhen you focus on rebuilding yourself.
And like I always say, surrenderingthe outcome, surrendering the outcome.
I fully believe that if there'sstill breath, there is life.

(05:29):
And if there's still breath,I believe that God really
wants to restore your family.
Sometimes he is waiting on us.
Sometimes he is waiting on your kids.
We both will learn somethingin this whole process.
I promise you that.
I have more lessons than I care to share.
I have so many lessons I'velearned during this time.

(05:51):
It's made me who I am todayand for that I'm grateful.
And it's not something you wouldexpect me to say, but I really am.
I'm grateful for what it taught me.
I'm not grateful for the situation,but I'm grateful for what it taught me.
So I hope this helps you today andI will see you in the next episode.
God bless.