February 25, 2025 โข 50 mins
Feeling rejected or doubting your worth? In this powerful episode, we chat with Arianna Ramsay, Miss Teenage Canada 2024, as she opens up about overcoming self-doubt and embracing resilience.
From her early steps into the pageant world to becoming an advocate for body positivity and anti-bullying, Arianna shares how rejection became her stepping stone toward success and purpose. As a trailblazer and founder of H.E.R.O Canada, she encourages us to redefine success, embrace our unique beauty, and build a strong support system.
๐ Key Takeaways: โ๏ธ Overcoming rejection and self-doubt โ๏ธ Redefining success on your own terms โ๏ธ The power of surrounding yourself with a strong support system โ๏ธ Why stepping away from things that donโt serve you is essential for growth โ๏ธ Turning rejection into redirection and embracing "your own kind of beautiful"
๐ฌ Arianna's Advice: "You are inherently worthy. Donโt let others define your success. Focus on your journey, not just the outcome."
๐ง Listen now for an empowering conversation that proves how rejection can lead to unexpected opportunities and purpose.
๐ Follow Arianna & Her Initiatives: ๐ธ Instagram: @ari.m37 Facebook: Arianna Ramsay H.E.R.O Canada Instagram: @hero.canada Miss Teenage Canada Instagram: @teenagecanada
๐ข Connect with Us ๐ธ Instagram: @the_rejectedpremed_podcast ๐ผ LinkedIn: Valeria Rusnak ๐ฉ Email: valerusu55@gmail.com โ Donate: buymeacoffee.com/valeriarusnak
If you need someone to talk to about rejection or feeling lost, you can book a private meeting with me at calendly.com/valerusu55. Everything we discuss will stay between us.
Disclaimer: This podcast is for informational, educational, and entertainment purposes only. It is not intended to provide legal, medical, or professional advice.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
Welcome back everyone to the ninth episode of the Rejected Premium Podcast.
(00:06):
This is my first episode that I'm recording in 2025 and I gotta say I'm excited to see
what this year has in store for the podcast.
There will definitely be more rejection talk this year which I often say is probably not
the most pleasant topic for a conversation but this podcast is all about showing how
rejection is often redirection and it is not innately negative.
In fact, it can lead us to personal and professional growth and could be viewed as a potential
(00:29):
opportunity.
In today's episode we have Ariana Ramsey, the Miss Teenage Canada of 2024 joining us.
Ariana embodies passion and ambition transitioning from modeling to pageantry and now embracing
academia with a Bachelor of Commerce in Fall 2025.
She dreams of merging business with healthcare by establishing an ultrasound clinic.
As a half-Philippina, she aims to break cultural barriers and inspire others as a strong entrepreneur.
(00:53):
Growing up with a photographer father, Ariana developed a passion for the camera, now as
an international representative, she is dedicated to making a meaningful impact through initiatives
like Love Yourself and Hero.
She champions body positivity, health awareness, and fights bullying worldwide.
In this episode we will discuss Ariana's journey in the modeling and pageant industry.
Talk about the rejections she has faced along her path and what advice she has for the audience
(01:18):
for overcoming rejections and building resilience.
Ariana, you're one impressive woman.
It is a true honor having you on the podcast.
Thank you so much for making the time out of your busy schedule to record this episode.
I truly appreciate it and we will discuss a lot of things today but first tell me, how
do you feel about doing today's episode?
Oh my goodness, I'm feeling so excited to do today's episode.
(01:41):
I am just honored that you're having me on to be able to talk about my experience, my
opportunities that I have.
So honestly I'm just feeling really blessed.
So thank you.
Yeah, thank you so much.
Thank you for being here.
Before we get into more details about your story, I want to get to know more about your
start in modeling and pageantry.
You were just a kid when you first entered the modeling pageant world.
(02:05):
Can you describe what was it like when you first started out?
How did it feel when you first started out in the industry and how have you even led
to run from Miss Teenage Canada?
Yeah, I love this question honestly because people find it really funny when I first answer
it and you'll figure out why.
So my dad was a photographer as we found out in the introduction.
(02:27):
So I started off as this little model whenever he needed a test shoot done or anything like
that and I grew to love being in front of the camera.
And then it kind of slowed down after that and my friends decided to do a Miss Teen Calorie
pageant and that was when I got older.
I was in my early teens but I was so against it.
(02:53):
Interesting.
Right?
People will find it funny now that I'm doing pageants most of my time and I was so against
it.
My mom was trying to push me.
I was like, nope, you will not be on that stage.
But I ended up getting convinced.
I think what convinced me was just how radiant my friend was on the stage and how she's so
(03:18):
intelligent and at that point in the pageant and there still is one now, there's a test.
Unless a test, I think about like it's like a history test.
There's questions about the pageant, there's questions about Calorie and so she aced it,
she got the highest score.
She got that award and something about her on that stage not only beautiful but intelligent
(03:43):
made me want to join the pageant.
The following year, because I was younger, I joined Miss Junior Teen Calorie.
That was my first experience of rejection.
I ended up getting a title but it wasn't the main title.
At the time in that pageant, there was three demographic titles like there was Northern
(04:05):
Alberta, Central Alberta, Southern Alberta and then the Calorie title.
I ended up in Central Alberta.
I was super excited about that even though I was the title I was aiming for, it's a
title and it was still an opportunity to showcase everything.
I signed with my first modeling agency after that.
It kind of went on from there.
(04:27):
Yeah.
How did they sign you?
Did they see you at the pageant or how did that happen?
So my friend who won Miss Teen Calorie, she introduced me, she brought me to a casting
call.
Wow.
Okay.
And so now I believe that the pageant and the agency that I was with are in alliance
(04:48):
sort of.
I could be completely wrong but if I won the pageant, there's potentially like a scholarship
coming.
I've heard of that, that some pageants give scholarships and that was a big incentive
for me.
I've never went for it obviously but like.
I think you should.
I still think you should.
Oh my gosh.
I don't know.
(05:08):
I don't know if I see myself or even could be that because you know, difficult, it's
tough.
I don't even know what I would be going into.
But the fact that they offer scholarships is just so cool and I think that's so beneficial
because financial barriers, well, everyone, not everyone but a lot of people experience
and it could just really help.
So yeah, anyways, I interrupted you.
Sorry.
(05:28):
I was interrupting you and I think you being worried about the unknown is what makes pageantry
so beautiful I think.
And like for me, for instance, when I went into the junior team Calgary, my mindset
before I went in, it wasn't on so excited for this pageant to be honest.
It was, I really don't want to do this.
(05:51):
The only reason I'm doing this is because I basically signed a photo with my mom saying,
oh, I'll do it for fun.
So I went into it, the closer I got, the more I was like, hmm, this is kind of interesting.
This is something I've never done before.
And I think in our society today, we get so used to doing things that are common and inside
(06:19):
of our little box.
And as a pageant girl, I've been forced to step outside of that box and do these things
that I honestly wouldn't have done before.
And I'm now doing them and it changed my life for the better.
So being a paid or being nervous about the unknown going into something, I think it
(06:45):
makes it so beautiful because it can turn into something so amazing.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's true.
That's true.
I remember in one of the episodes, I talked about what it means to be resilient and how
to build resilience.
And I mentioned something similar that a lot of being resilient and facing life is about
being comfortable with uncertainty.
And I guess that's what you have definitely had to learn when you were going into pageantry
(07:08):
and modeling, I guess, because both are uncertain fields and there's so much competition and
I would assume.
Because many people struggle comparing themselves to others and that goes for every field and
that goes for everyone, like even just take social media.
We're just living this era where people put out their best selves, but no one knows our
(07:29):
lows.
People just know our highs.
And I feel like maybe modeling pageantry is similar and people do compare themselves
to others and they can't help it sometimes.
And how do you stay grounded and maintain that positive self-image and environment that can
be competitive?
Yeah, I think it's important to mention that when I first started, it wasn't.
(07:55):
My headspace wasn't in a place where I was confident and I was able to be grounded and
I would be completely lying if I didn't say that I didn't struggle.
But as I continue to grow in the field and seeing other beautiful women around me and
other intelligent people, the more I traveled, it made me realize that everyone is beautiful
(08:22):
in their own ways.
And winning Miss Tee-Dee Canada this year, our slogan is be your own kind of beautiful.
So being able to resonate with that now makes me feel grounded knowing that if my eating
is off one day, it's not a complete setback.
(08:44):
It's just a moment that I'm struggling with at the time and it doesn't make me any less
beautiful.
Yeah.
And so when I used to compare myself, it was always from a selfish point of view.
It was always, oh, it's about me and it's about me and it's about my body and it's about
(09:07):
my hair and it's about my makeup and how I look at the time, but it goes beyond that.
And when you think about everyone else, when you're doing these things and you include
other perspectives, like think about, I'm getting my makeup done and I'm not feeling
it.
What about the makeup artist that's doing it?
It's her beautiful work or the hairstylist that is doing my hair at the time.
(09:29):
I'm not feeling confident in my forehead.
It's not about my forehead.
It's about the hair that's on my head and having the privilege to get all of this done
in the first place.
And I think something that keeps me grounded is just understanding that all these opportunities
that are coming to me is a blessing and as an honor goes beyond my selfish outlook.
(09:53):
And once I included other people in, honestly, in my thinking, it changed everything.
And having supportive organizations as well, like Miss Kimmage Canada or a community or
your family that really supports you when you're feeling down, whenever I felt like
(10:14):
I was struggling with my body image or I was struggling with my confidence, my family and
obviously Miss Teenage Canada, the organization, my national director, Michelle and my team,
they're so supportive and I honestly wouldn't be here without them.
For me who's not in that kind of world in that industry, it's very easy to assume that
(10:35):
all these pageant organizations or all these modeling organizations are the same.
It's very easy to assume that.
But hearing you say that it is important to find organizations and there are organizations
that can't support you.
They won't degrade you in any way.
They'll actually celebrate you for who you are and help you glow and come out in a beautiful
(10:56):
way and be yourself in that organization.
So I think that's a very important stereotype.
We're breaking down here because it's very easy to assume that.
And I'm so glad that you found an organization that did support you because just as there
are good organizations, I can imagine that just in any field, there are organizations
(11:17):
that can be not so supportive and just a shout out to all the people who are involved with
those organizations.
You're not alone.
You said that now you're good, but you did face those concerns with body image and it's
just something I'm not even in that field, but I remember myself experiencing those feelings
(11:37):
too, especially as I was growing up and my body was changing and it's ongoing too.
I'm 24 now and my body continues to change and it's something that you want to celebrate.
It's about what you said about being your own kind of beautiful and finding confidence
in that.
And I'm really glad that you found an organization and have support systems that can help you
(12:00):
reinforce that when you yourself feel down and you don't feel super beautiful because
we all have those moments.
We all do.
So I appreciate you sharing that.
And I guess relating to that question, do you think you ever faced rejections or feelings
of rejection or self doubt in the industry?
(12:21):
Yeah, did you ever experience those?
And if you're comfortable sharing, would you describe those experiences and how did you
deal with those feelings?
A thousand percent.
A thousand percent experience.
A thousand percent.
And I think, honestly, I love what you're doing with this podcast because for me, I've
(12:42):
always been so open about, yeah, I've been rejected.
Yeah, and I'll say it for the people in the back.
And on the other hand, I know people in this industry who are like, no, I haven't been
rejected.
And I think that's people everywhere.
It's just very difficult to admit to ourselves.
It is.
It is.
It is.
(13:02):
Yeah.
And I think that's a real piece of judgment coming from a place where it's like, I just
want to hear your story and I want to be able to learn something and I want to be able to
help other people.
And that's why I love what you're doing.
No, thank you because I've heard several people share in general that sometimes when they're
(13:23):
struggling or like, say, like university students, they're struggling, they could go
to student wellness services, they could go there.
And those are really helpful resources, but it's a whole different thing and it can be
helpful on the side to get a perspective of what other peers, like people who are in
your age range or like what they're going through and how they dealt with something similar
that you've been through as well.
(13:46):
Because it just shows that, okay, this person is similar to me.
They've experienced similar things and they've overcame that.
So I can overcome that too.
And it's peer support in a way.
I think it's a beautiful thing.
And I wasn't really sure what I was doing when I was starting this podcast.
I just felt like, I just felt like, I don't know, maybe call it intuition, call it a calling.
(14:07):
I don't know what it was, but it did really push me in that direction.
And now I'm doing something that I didn't even think I would be ever doing.
I'm interviewing people about their life and the rejections they went through.
And I hope it does make an impact and it helps people see that they're not alone and rejection
is not the end of the world because it could be just the beginning of something too.
(14:28):
Exactly.
Yeah, but thank you.
Thank you for telling me about that.
No, of course.
And like you were saying about starting the podcast, whether it was a calling or an intuition
or something like that, that's really in the unknown that I was talking about.
And not knowing where you're going, but just having that feeling in your heart that it's
meant to be is just such a beautiful thing.
(14:49):
And I'm so happy you found that.
Yeah, thank you.
Thank you.
Yeah, of course.
I kind of got away from the question.
I asked you, I'm sorry.
No, that was me.
Definitely.
I just wanted to appreciate you for a second.
Thank you.
Thank you.
I always, I take it.
I used to be very wary of compliments.
I used to make me uncomfortable, but now I try to, if one of my goals is to be like,
(15:12):
take it in and be like, thank you.
But remaining humble.
Yeah, of course.
Well, I hope I didn't make you uncomfortable.
No, no, no.
I love compliments.
It builds my confidence.
Good.
That's what we're trying to do here.
Yeah, exactly.
Yeah.
Lead by example, right?
Exactly.
Exactly.
So yeah, the question was, do you ever face rejections or like feelings of rejection or
(15:37):
self doubt in the industry?
And you said a thousand percent.
So yeah, go ahead.
It started before pageantry, before modeling, before anything.
It started in school.
It started in elementary school and I found that it was constantly picked on, bullied.
(15:58):
And as I continued to grow up, I felt as though it was more about me being half-Filipina.
Being half-Filipina and born in Canada, I felt as though when I was growing up and I
was trying to find a group that could support me and could want it to be my friend almost.
(16:19):
It was like, when I went to more of a Filipino structured group, I felt too Canadian.
I felt outcasted.
But being not completely white, whatever I felt as though I was reaching for a more different
group, I felt outcasted there.
(16:39):
So not only did I feel upset that I was being bullied, that was my first setback in the
feeling of rejection.
And it's starting from a young age.
I carried into junior high and I had a really hard time finding friends and when I did find
(16:59):
a friend, I'd mess it up somehow because I wasn't confident myself.
I was like, oh, this person is just going to leave me.
This person is talking bad about me.
This person is, they have other friends.
They don't like me.
I felt these thoughts constantly in my head and it completely diminished myself.
But that's why when I was talking about going into pageantry, I did not want to do it.
(17:28):
That ties into it.
And I felt as though there was the stereotype on pageantry where a pageant girl gets put
on this pedestal and just is viewed as perfect.
She has it all together, she doesn't have any bad experiences.
Exactly.
And these pageant girls have these big crowns, they're pretentious.
(17:51):
That was my thought process going into it because that was where my self-esteem was
at because of my childhood and everything that I experienced at the time.
So that was probably my first rejection.
It carried on for a really long time and I'm honestly just getting over it now.
(18:11):
So I'm being honest, like over the past year.
And the reason why is because I created Hero Canada.
Right.
And to you bullying online platform that I created about a year and a half ago now.
And I just use that platform to spread awareness about bullying and spread awareness about
(18:33):
how it's intertwined with pageantry and pageantry isn't about this girl with a crown and a sash
on a pedestal who thinks she's perfect or has her life together.
It's not about that.
That crown goes beyond the physical appearance of it.
It goes deeper.
It goes into the way you can use that crown to be in front of little girls and share these
(18:56):
experiences that it's okay to not be okay.
Like the cliche.
But it's not just a cliche.
It's so genuine.
And I think that if these little girls started to see the imperfections and started to realize
that everybody has them and it's okay and being your own kind of beautiful, that's what
(19:18):
the crown represents.
It doesn't represent being perfect and it doesn't represent being all knowing and just
overall amazing almost.
It's just like it's a symbol for these little girls and these kids who feel bullied and who
(19:41):
feel alone and feel distressed because they're going through the same thing I did and that's
why I created Hero and that's why I use my crown and my sash to be in the community,
to help these little kids, to talk to them, to have them understand that it goes beyond
the physical appearance of it.
Yeah.
Okay, let's just process everything.
(20:02):
You said it's just so beautiful and I don't even know where to start.
First of all, you're amazing.
Oh gosh.
Yes, the fact that you turned, there's the saying, pain into purpose because even though
rejection suck and I'm so sorry that you were bullied and doesn't feel nice.
I've had my share of experiences and it sucks and it just when you're already going through
(20:27):
your stuff and then there's people who even undermine you even further that just adds
to your low self-esteem and the fact that you experienced that, I'm sorry, but the fact
that you use that experience and turn it into something meaningful to help little girls
and people in the community to build Hero Canada, that's just truly beautiful and we
(20:50):
don't want to romanticize rejection here because in this case especially because bullying
sucks, but the fact that you got something out of it and it did frame you into doing
this project and it framed you into the person you are today and it made you in a way maybe,
maybe it made you more empathetic to what they're going through because you remember
(21:11):
that pain, you remember that feeling and you remember how that affected you at the time
and the fact that you just said that you were just getting over it just shows the reality
of how some rejections like in this case bullying is a social form of rejection, social rejection,
how sometimes it takes a long time to get over it because rejections like this they
(21:32):
feel personal, bullying that can really scar I feel that can really have an impact.
You're very real for sharing that you're just getting over that some of that pain that you've
experienced and it's true, I can understand that and the fact that you turn that into
such a beautiful project and you've made meaning in the community because of it just shows
how we can use rejection to reframe us even though they do suck in the moment, but they
(22:00):
do help us in a way in the future to do something meaningful.
So thank you so much.
Thank you so much for sharing that experience of yours.
I appreciate that and you're so right, bullying does beat up scar and it does fall into your
future but when take it and you're able to really understand it and grasp what you experienced
(22:23):
and how you can use it to do something and like you said pain into purpose.
Yeah, exactly.
And when I started this podcast, I didn't know why I wanted to do it.
I just felt like I did.
But in the process, I hope that I helped people, but I for sure know I helped myself in that.
So in a way, it's just a nice way of processing what happened and it makes me feel more empowered
(22:47):
because instead of being stuck in that pain, which is very tempting sometimes, you're like,
okay, let's just make small baby steps, see what comes out of it and turn it into something
that can help people because by sharing my experience, it can be very therapeutic, but
also other people hear it.
So it's like a win-win.
You're really helping yourself and you're helping others process it, what just happened
(23:10):
and how to move on from it in a healthy way.
So and maybe for you was a similar thing when you were starting this project, maybe in a
way it was healing a part of you that was still wounded from those bullying experiences
that you had.
So I don't know, there's just so many layers to this.
Yeah, you're so right.
When we talk about rejections and we talk about how bullying was just a scar because it affected
(23:38):
my self-esteem so much when I was rejected in the future.
It made it so much harder.
So when I got to compete for Philippines, part of me was so excited because as a kid,
like I said, I felt like an outcast.
I didn't feel like I belonged.
Now I represent this national title at an international stage.
(24:00):
I placed top 10 internationally and although it's amazing because it's top 10 out of the
many countries that are there, I still felt awful when I didn't place.
Philippines has a reputation.
They are a documentary powerhouse and wearing that title across my chest.
(24:21):
It was incredible and when I felt as though I didn't do it justice, I carried that with
me.
I was constantly thinking about it and I also experienced bullying at the national stage.
On the live stream, there were all comments about me and my weight and what I was wearing
and I wasn't open about that at the time.
(24:44):
Just being a point of that title and that was my first international title and I didn't
know what to do at the time.
I didn't know if I should spread awareness or post these comments or respond to them
or anything like that.
I think that's what bullying does to you.
It just leaves you so confused.
It leaves you feeling so lost.
Did I do something to deserve this?
(25:05):
Was there something that I did sometime leading up to this point that made me deserve these
negative comments or accusations or anything like that because that's how I was feeling
at that time after I walked off that stage and I opened my phone for the first time.
There were still comments from people that I didn't even know that were like the reason
(25:27):
you didn't place is because you're too overweight or your dress was just a right.
It was awful.
It was so awful and at the time, at the time I think I was around 15.
Oh, not that it hurts any less when you're older but like, oh, it's just.
I know.
I'm so sorry you went through that.
That sucks.
(25:48):
It's all good.
But after that, I competed again.
I did it again.
I went to a different pageant, still international and I wore Canada across my chest this time
and I competed at Supermodel International in Thailand and I ended up getting first runner
up and I went into this pageant with a different mindset.
(26:12):
After team universe and feeling as though I was rejected and feeling I was denied, I
had such an incredible support system.
My team, SEI models, they supported me, they allowed me to compete again, even though my
self-worth was down the drain, they uplifted me and they taught me that I can do anything
(26:41):
that I said I might do.
And although I felt denied, one of my idols, one of my role models in the pageantry world,
Catriona Gray, she was missing in person in 2018, she's from the Philippines, she said
you're denied, you're only redirected.
When I have a feeling of rejection and I don't want a pageant or I get first runner up, I
(27:07):
don't see it as something where I'm denied.
It just wasn't meant for me and that's okay.
Everything has to be made for me or has to be mine, that the winner, Vietnam, that one
the year that I competed and got first runner up holding her hand, I saw her go on stage
and I saw her go on to amazing things after that and that is good enough.
(27:35):
After that, what did I do?
I don't even know anymore.
I'm just like, I'm rambling here.
No, no, you're not, you're sharing such, trust me, what you're sharing is good.
Do you see me like, I'm just like holding my heart.
Your storytelling is top notch.
And let me circle back around to my current title.
(27:55):
When I competed for Miss Junior Team Calgary and What's Spectral, Alberta, like I was talking
about, that qualified me to compete at Miss Teenage Canada for the first time in 2021.
And so I went on to compete in the summer.
It was August.
I was contestant number one from Alberta.
(28:15):
I still remember every single detail about that.
This top five, that was another redirection.
It just wasn't meant for me at the time.
And then I went on to compete internationally after that, 20s.
And I went to a fashion week.
I was traveling and then this year I was like, you know what, let's do it again.
(28:37):
Even though it was technically rejection and it just wasn't meant for me at that time.
I would now with my platform in Hero Canada and everything that I'm doing, I felt secure
in the place where, you know what, let's do it again.
Let's do it again with a different mindset because remember, I didn't want the pageant
initially.
(28:58):
I just want to do any of that now with this love that I have for it.
Like I could use this title for something amazing, for something incredible to turn
my pain into purpose like you were saying.
And as Miss Teenage Canada says, to find your own kind of beautiful.
And when I competed again, I came in with my team this year and they prepared me.
(29:26):
They trained me hours and hours of training that they set aside for me.
I'm so beyond thankful.
And I ended up winning.
And that was the first time, honestly, since being bullied and since all these three directions
where something in my heart felt secure.
That was the first time that I felt as though I won something and I was able to just earn
(29:50):
it.
And it took hours of training and crying and dieting and everything to just feeling
ๅฉๅฉ my successor put the crown on my head.
I couldn't believe it.
I was shaking and it was, it's crazy.
The journey, the journey you went through is just, you know, you did find your own
(30:18):
kind of beautiful.
You did discover that and you, you always were beautiful and you always did have that
worth.
You just, you just didn't see it at the time.
And who can blame you because because you've gone through so much
of going online at the time when the Philippines when you place top 10,
that's an accomplishment in itself.
That's that's amazing.
(30:39):
But but it's really about our perception, right?
And the perception of other people and how you were influenced by what people
said about you and who who wouldn't be.
It's just so difficult.
And for being a 15 year old girl having gone through that.
But you know, it is a part of your life and it is what happened.
And now you are where you are today.
(31:00):
And you probably you're more grounded in your positive self image.
And you have more confidence than probably a lot of people do because of the things
you went through.
And because of the things you went through, you're just kind of like, OK,
I've got to refrain my mindset.
And for me, this was when I was rejected from medical school.
(31:20):
I was I was very self critical.
I was very judgmental towards myself.
And but I'm like, I either have to refrain my mindset and have to become more
self compassionate or I will I will crush myself from the inside.
And, you know, you have to make that choice.
Either crush yourself or you become stronger in a way you're there for yourself.
(31:40):
Like you're there.
You show up for yourself no matter what happens.
And that's what happened to you.
And I'm so glad to hear that you've you finally felt it.
You felt secure in that win.
I mean, you are a winning personality, winning lady in overall.
Like you've been that it's just it took you time to see it.
(32:01):
And I'm so glad you did.
I'm so glad you reached that point.
And I'm so glad their organization like Miss Teenage Canada was there for you
to help you see that surrounding yourself intentionally with people who do support you.
Well, hopefully that that did help you and that contributed to you finding yourself again
and finding and rediscovering your self worth because we all have it.
(32:22):
We just don't see it sometimes, especially when we feel like we've been rejected
and those things happen.
But, you know, that experience that you had framed you into a stronger being
into a stronger woman.
And, you know, that helped you become more stronger and place boundaries faster.
And, you know, you've just learned so much throughout the way and it will definitely
(32:45):
help you down the line when you face future difficulties, when you face future setbacks.
There is hope and eventually you can move on.
It just it takes time and patience and self compassion and coming to that place
of self love for yourself.
So thank you for sharing your story.
It's truly beautiful and thank you for being so vulnerable and it's really brave, you know,
(33:06):
and coming on this podcast on this platform to share what you've been through.
It's inspiring.
First of all, for me, it's inspiring for our listeners as well.
Because, you know, as we were talking earlier, people face rejections, but no one likes to
admit that to other people, let alone like admit it to themselves.
So the fact that you're here and you're sharing this definitely feels like part of
(33:27):
you have moved on from it and you do feel more secure.
So I think that's beautiful.
And just just thank you for being here.
Thank you for having me.
I really appreciate that.
Just like feeling appreciated for being vulnerable is such a good compliment.
And I think being in this pageantry world, I've learned how to be vulnerable and it
(33:49):
wasn't always like that.
It wasn't like after Teen Universe, like I was saying, I shut it down.
I did not want to talk about it.
And I just want to set the record straight that my body was changing.
I was 15 and anybody listening who feels that they are in that spot right now,
(34:10):
don't feel as though that it's a setback.
It's not anything that's setting you back.
If it has to do with your weight or your self confidence, it's not setback.
It's just you change it.
It's you finding your own kind of people.
Nice.
I love it.
We'll keep coming back to that.
I love it.
I honestly love it.
And like being Miss Teenage Canada, like that's what I want to keep talking about.
(34:34):
That's my, honestly, one of my purposes as a type of person is to be
just a type of older.
So if you talk to me and be prepared, you will always hear that.
Yes.
Yes.
It's okay.
We need to hear it.
We need to hear more of that message in the world.
Yeah.
It just really helps hearing that.
(34:55):
I've heard it and we've talked before about this and I've heard this go,
but every time I hear it, just my heart flutters a little bit because it's just,
it's beautiful and it's always a good thing to keep in the back of your mind.
No matter who you are, no matter where you are, what position you're in,
you're your own kind of beautiful.
And that's just great.
Yeah.
And, you know, now that you feel more secure and you've gone through that
(35:18):
crazy experience and that's such a young age.
How now, how do you balance striving for excellence?
And you have so many goals and on the horizon and you have projects going on.
How do you balance striving for excellence while allowing yourself the grace to
fail and learn? Because a lot of people can find the balance between those things.
(35:39):
And I'm one of those people.
Sometimes I can be really hard on myself when I feel like I just failed.
And that fear of failure can sometimes prevent me from pursuing my dreams or
start sabotaging myself.
And I guess that goes to many people as well.
So how do you find that balance?
How do you strive for excellence and you want, you know, you want that ambition,
(36:00):
you want things and, but also, you know, allowing yourself to kind of say,
it's okay if something didn't come to me, that that's fine.
Yeah.
That's a good question.
And some context for that and how it initially helped me and is looking at my
mom for an example.
My mom was definitely inspiration.
She works so hard.
(36:22):
She works two part times and she's here.
She's cooking for us.
She's supporting us.
She's like, honestly, the epitome of time management growing up.
I saw that and now with everything I do with the traveling and with the working,
like I was working four part time jobs at one point plus traveling plus school
(36:44):
before I graduated.
And my mom was the reason I was able to time manage that just being able to look
at her and knowing that like, wow, she is so strong in herself and being able to
do that.
But on the opposite hand, would be able to strive for ambition.
Certain things just need more attention.
And what I had to learn, honestly, the hard way was it's okay to step back and take
(37:09):
yourself out of certain situations that aren't supporting your ambitions that you're
striving for.
And when it came to work, I was working four part time jobs at one, at one point.
And I was still wanting to travel and I was still wanting to do all these things like
go to fashion week and I was like, but I need the money, but I need the money.
(37:31):
But part of me was also burnt out.
And I had to realize that it goes beyond the money and how am I supposed to go and do
these things that I love and want to support my team for when I physically can't get out
of the bed or I'm stuck at work doing an eight hour shift and then have to go to work
(37:54):
right after that.
And just the idea of being able to take yourself out of a situation and know that you're not
going to be judged.
You're not going to be not going to offend anybody.
You're not harming anybody else.
You are supporting yourself for the goals that you want.
And as much as I talk about not being selfish and thinking about other people and other
(38:20):
people's perception, that's the one thing that I would say.
Honestly, you need to think about yourself in today's society when there's so many things
going on, there's so many opportunities.
There's so many things that can burn you out and have to experience these things and get
out there, get in the community volunteer, do all these things.
If I'm working for part time jobs and I can only speak for myself because my financial
(38:46):
situation is different than everybody else's.
I recognize that, but it goes beyond the financial aspect.
If you're doing something that you feel as though isn't benefiting you, take yourself
out of the situation.
Do yourself a favor.
Do something else that can contribute to your main goal.
(39:08):
And for me, at the time that was going to Miss Tanaige Canada and I had to sacrifice a couple
of jobs, I had to sacrifice certain friends, certain people in my life to be able to reach
that goal.
But at the end of the day, that's what got me there.
And now I can use all that energy that I was putting into other things that weren't benefiting
(39:32):
me to something better.
No, that's a really good message to share.
Being able to balance that and being able to give things up and not feel as though you're
rejected.
I think we also have to look at the other side of it, like not only rejection, but taking
yourself out of situations, intentionally taking yourself out of situations that aren't
(39:54):
benefiting you and are honestly causing yourself harm and maybe other people harm.
No, I definitely agree.
There's like nothing else to add to it.
So yeah, thank you for sharing that.
What would you recommend to listeners currently going through a rejection or fear of being
rejected?
What are some best ways we can use to overcome it?
(40:16):
And how do we build confidence and resilience in the process?
I know it's a loaded question, but start where you like.
Whenever I talk about things, like whenever we're having a conversation, it's often personal
experience.
And I know other people have it worse than I do.
But that goes with comparison, like we talked about and how I responded to that and how
(40:41):
I'm going to respond to this is you can be your own kind of beautiful.
And I know it sounds repetitive, but it's so important to get it out there that if you
feel as though you're struggling and you're going through something, the first step is
to realize that it's okay and it's your own journey and it's your own path.
(41:05):
And I think it's important to stay on your own path and allow time to heal these things
and allow yourself to realize that it's okay to be where you're at right now.
It's okay to struggle and just discovering your own beauty in it and your own light in
the situation is a start.
(41:27):
And no matter what you're going through, you're obviously not alone.
There's many platforms, there's many services that can support you.
And that's why I created Hero, right?
If you're feeling as though you are being bullied or honestly, if you're feeling as though
you are in a position where maybe you're bullying, it's okay to look at these things and just
(41:51):
understand it and take it all in and realize that these things that we've always seen on
TV or on social media that are just so intimidating, these are real resources that you can use.
People are working and striving to be able to help you.
If I were to say anything to any of these people, it's not only be your own kind of
(42:15):
beautiful but don't be afraid to step out and don't be afraid to be vulnerable because
there's beauty in vulnerability and there's beauty in honesty and being able to share
your experiences.
It will help you but it helps other people to help you, other people to be able to learn
(42:37):
to help other people.
It's a community effort and know that you are not alone at any point in time, ever.
Yeah, that's great.
Thank you.
Thank you for sharing that.
And yeah, like you said, it's allowing yourself to be your own kind of beautiful and sometimes
we don't want to, especially with the rejection just happened or a setback just happened,
(43:02):
something bad in your life has happened.
You don't want to hear that when it just happened because you're sad and that's okay
to be sad and accept all your emotions but in that moment whatever you're feeling is
beautiful because it's a part of who you are and you're being honest with yourself about
what you're experiencing.
I think that's a big part of overcoming rejection like don't or your setbacks, like don't deny
(43:27):
it, let yourself be what your body wants you to be in that moment.
Just experience it and healing will naturally come to you and surrounding yourself with
the people who will support you and like you said, I think practically it's very good
to refer to resources.
There's hotlines, there's like your platform like Hero Canada and Kids Help Phone.
(43:54):
Those are all things that you can refer to and there's people who can help you and like
you said, you're not alone and I feel like success, it's very honorable to strive for
success and it's very good that people strive for it and they're trying to find themselves
and go after their goals but success is a very broad term and it's about aligning with
(44:18):
your strengths and aligning with your values to see what your definition of success is
and don't let anyone define or tell you what success looks like.
You have to discover it for yourself and it may not come right away.
Sometimes it comes through trying things and saying, okay, this is not for me.
This is what I should be going for and with your story, you know, you've tried several
(44:39):
different organizations and you've landed on this teenage Canada that helps you so much
and that's when you knew, okay, I found my people.
I found people who can support me and I feel like that's a big part of fostering resilience
and confidence is surrounding yourself with people who bring out the best in you.
I find that it can be difficult sometimes depending on what situation you're in but
(45:03):
that's one of the first steps to building confidence and resilience too.
So yeah.
It's beautiful that idea of success and how you define success and so when we talk about
feeling as though you're struggling and you're feeling rejected, let's take a moment to realize
what you went through to feel that and your idea of rejection can be someone's idea of
(45:27):
success and if you take it from this mentality of my cup is half empty to half full, it changes
everything almost and when I competed for this teenage Canada the second time, I went
into it with no expectations, I didn't know that I was going to be able to go internationally
(45:53):
after that.
All I knew was that I was going in with a fresh mentality and look where it took me.
I think that when we change our mindsets to what is my definition of success, my definition
of success wasn't set on if I win this teenage Canada, that's the point of success.
(46:16):
It wasn't that it was me going into it having a good week, meeting these pageant queens
and just being there, being present and doing everything that I did but intentionally this
time that was my idea of success and the crown that was a cherry on top.
So that's everything for me.
(46:36):
So when you mentioned that I was like that's so beautiful, you're so correct.
I love everything you just said.
Thank you.
I think it just is beautiful that it does apply to everyone really and you can take
that advice as you want.
So it's like based on what situation you are in, we can give all the advice we want that
(46:58):
we think is true to us but I find that it's universal enough that anyone who's listening
to it can apply to their lives.
Either way, do have faith in yourself and do surround yourselves with people who do support
you and find your definition of success.
They're almost coming to the end of the episode so it's a good message to almost end on.
Any last thoughts or main takeaways you have for our listeners, Ariana, before we wrap
(47:23):
up?
One more time, I want to say be your own kind of beautiful.
I mean that I'm always going to say if you need me, you know I always talk about it.
If you are feeling as though you are rejected like Catriona Gray said once, you're not
denied, you're redirected and if you're feeling as though you're struggling, it's okay.
(47:45):
It's okay to be in those feelings and it's okay to do that but just know that your time
will come and you will find beauty in your pain and that's okay.
Beautiful.
Beautiful.
And where can the listeners connect with you in case they want to learn more about your
story or they have questions or want to just be in touch?
Yeah, so if you're interested in finding my pages, I have Instagram and Facebook.
(48:11):
Facebook is just my name, ariana ramsey and Instagram is ra.m37 if you're interested
in looking at Teenage Canada or Hero Canada.
It's just the names for Instagram.
So hero.canada or Teenage Canada on Instagram.
Great.
We'll make sure to definitely put that in the show notes too.
(48:32):
Thank you.
Thank you so much, Ariana, for joining me on the podcast.
It was such a pleasure talking to you and learning about your journey truly.
For many people, it might be easy to think and tempting to think, oh, Ariana is Miss
Teenage Canada.
She has it all.
She's beautiful, smart, successful.
What can she know about rejection?
But Ariana is certainly successful and her future is bright.
(48:57):
Behind that image of success, she has faced her own share of rejections and painful experiences
that have shaped her into the incredible person she is today.
Rejection is a universal experience and behind every success story, there's often a story
of failure or rejection.
So as cheesy as that sounds, don't be afraid of failure.
Embrace it.
(49:17):
It does help you grow personally and professionally, even though it doesn't feel like that, especially
when you're just in the midst of it, or in the midst of that feeling.
You never know where it might lead you as rejection is often just redirection.
Of course, it's easier said than done, but that's okay.
We're all still learning together and it's a lifelong journey.
I'd love to hear from what you listeners all thought of this episode.
(49:39):
Feel free to DM me to share your thoughts or suggest topics you have been covering future
episodes.
And if you'd like to support the podcast and the content, you can donate at the link by
MiaCoffee.com slash ValeriaRusnak.
I don't remember if that's the right one, but I'll make sure to put that in the show
notes too.
This has been ValeriaRusnak, the host of the Rejected Pre-Met podcast.
(50:01):
I thank you all for listening and I will see you next time.
Welcome back everyone to the ninth episode of the Rejected Premium Podcast.
(00:06):
This is my first episode that I'm recording in 2025 and I gotta say I'm excited to see
what this year has in store for the podcast.
There will definitely be more rejection talk this year which I often say is probably not
the most pleasant topic for a conversation but this podcast is all about showing how
rejection is often redirection and it is not innately negative.
In fact, it can lead us to personal and professional growth and could be viewed as a potential
(00:29):
opportunity.
In today's episode we have Ariana Ramsey, the Miss Teenage Canada of 2024 joining us.
Ariana embodies passion and ambition transitioning from modeling to pageantry and now embracing
academia with a Bachelor of Commerce in Fall 2025.
She dreams of merging business with healthcare by establishing an ultrasound clinic.
As a half-Philippina, she aims to break cultural barriers and inspire others as a strong entrepreneur.
(00:53):
Growing up with a photographer father, Ariana developed a passion for the camera, now as
an international representative, she is dedicated to making a meaningful impact through initiatives
like Love Yourself and Hero.
She champions body positivity, health awareness, and fights bullying worldwide.
In this episode we will discuss Ariana's journey in the modeling and pageant industry.
Talk about the rejections she has faced along her path and what advice she has for the audience
(01:18):
for overcoming rejections and building resilience.
Ariana, you're one impressive woman.
It is a true honor having you on the podcast.
Thank you so much for making the time out of your busy schedule to record this episode.
I truly appreciate it and we will discuss a lot of things today but first tell me, how
do you feel about doing today's episode?
Oh my goodness, I'm feeling so excited to do today's episode.
(01:41):
I am just honored that you're having me on to be able to talk about my experience, my
opportunities that I have.
So honestly I'm just feeling really blessed.
So thank you.
Yeah, thank you so much.
Thank you for being here.
Before we get into more details about your story, I want to get to know more about your
start in modeling and pageantry.
You were just a kid when you first entered the modeling pageant world.
(02:05):
Can you describe what was it like when you first started out?
How did it feel when you first started out in the industry and how have you even led
to run from Miss Teenage Canada?
Yeah, I love this question honestly because people find it really funny when I first answer
it and you'll figure out why.
So my dad was a photographer as we found out in the introduction.
(02:27):
So I started off as this little model whenever he needed a test shoot done or anything like
that and I grew to love being in front of the camera.
And then it kind of slowed down after that and my friends decided to do a Miss Teen Calorie
pageant and that was when I got older.
I was in my early teens but I was so against it.
(02:53):
Interesting.
Right?
People will find it funny now that I'm doing pageants most of my time and I was so against
it.
My mom was trying to push me.
I was like, nope, you will not be on that stage.
But I ended up getting convinced.
I think what convinced me was just how radiant my friend was on the stage and how she's so
(03:18):
intelligent and at that point in the pageant and there still is one now, there's a test.
Unless a test, I think about like it's like a history test.
There's questions about the pageant, there's questions about Calorie and so she aced it,
she got the highest score.
She got that award and something about her on that stage not only beautiful but intelligent
(03:43):
made me want to join the pageant.
The following year, because I was younger, I joined Miss Junior Teen Calorie.
That was my first experience of rejection.
I ended up getting a title but it wasn't the main title.
At the time in that pageant, there was three demographic titles like there was Northern
(04:05):
Alberta, Central Alberta, Southern Alberta and then the Calorie title.
I ended up in Central Alberta.
I was super excited about that even though I was the title I was aiming for, it's a
title and it was still an opportunity to showcase everything.
I signed with my first modeling agency after that.
It kind of went on from there.
(04:27):
Yeah.
How did they sign you?
Did they see you at the pageant or how did that happen?
So my friend who won Miss Teen Calorie, she introduced me, she brought me to a casting
call.
Wow.
Okay.
And so now I believe that the pageant and the agency that I was with are in alliance
(04:48):
sort of.
I could be completely wrong but if I won the pageant, there's potentially like a scholarship
coming.
I've heard of that, that some pageants give scholarships and that was a big incentive
for me.
I've never went for it obviously but like.
I think you should.
I still think you should.
Oh my gosh.
I don't know.
(05:08):
I don't know if I see myself or even could be that because you know, difficult, it's
tough.
I don't even know what I would be going into.
But the fact that they offer scholarships is just so cool and I think that's so beneficial
because financial barriers, well, everyone, not everyone but a lot of people experience
and it could just really help.
So yeah, anyways, I interrupted you.
Sorry.
(05:28):
I was interrupting you and I think you being worried about the unknown is what makes pageantry
so beautiful I think.
And like for me, for instance, when I went into the junior team Calgary, my mindset
before I went in, it wasn't on so excited for this pageant to be honest.
It was, I really don't want to do this.
(05:51):
The only reason I'm doing this is because I basically signed a photo with my mom saying,
oh, I'll do it for fun.
So I went into it, the closer I got, the more I was like, hmm, this is kind of interesting.
This is something I've never done before.
And I think in our society today, we get so used to doing things that are common and inside
(06:19):
of our little box.
And as a pageant girl, I've been forced to step outside of that box and do these things
that I honestly wouldn't have done before.
And I'm now doing them and it changed my life for the better.
So being a paid or being nervous about the unknown going into something, I think it
(06:45):
makes it so beautiful because it can turn into something so amazing.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's true.
That's true.
I remember in one of the episodes, I talked about what it means to be resilient and how
to build resilience.
And I mentioned something similar that a lot of being resilient and facing life is about
being comfortable with uncertainty.
And I guess that's what you have definitely had to learn when you were going into pageantry
(07:08):
and modeling, I guess, because both are uncertain fields and there's so much competition and
I would assume.
Because many people struggle comparing themselves to others and that goes for every field and
that goes for everyone, like even just take social media.
We're just living this era where people put out their best selves, but no one knows our
(07:29):
lows.
People just know our highs.
And I feel like maybe modeling pageantry is similar and people do compare themselves
to others and they can't help it sometimes.
And how do you stay grounded and maintain that positive self-image and environment that can
be competitive?
Yeah, I think it's important to mention that when I first started, it wasn't.
(07:55):
My headspace wasn't in a place where I was confident and I was able to be grounded and
I would be completely lying if I didn't say that I didn't struggle.
But as I continue to grow in the field and seeing other beautiful women around me and
other intelligent people, the more I traveled, it made me realize that everyone is beautiful
(08:22):
in their own ways.
And winning Miss Tee-Dee Canada this year, our slogan is be your own kind of beautiful.
So being able to resonate with that now makes me feel grounded knowing that if my eating
is off one day, it's not a complete setback.
(08:44):
It's just a moment that I'm struggling with at the time and it doesn't make me any less
beautiful.
Yeah.
And so when I used to compare myself, it was always from a selfish point of view.
It was always, oh, it's about me and it's about me and it's about my body and it's about
(09:07):
my hair and it's about my makeup and how I look at the time, but it goes beyond that.
And when you think about everyone else, when you're doing these things and you include
other perspectives, like think about, I'm getting my makeup done and I'm not feeling
it.
What about the makeup artist that's doing it?
It's her beautiful work or the hairstylist that is doing my hair at the time.
(09:29):
I'm not feeling confident in my forehead.
It's not about my forehead.
It's about the hair that's on my head and having the privilege to get all of this done
in the first place.
And I think something that keeps me grounded is just understanding that all these opportunities
that are coming to me is a blessing and as an honor goes beyond my selfish outlook.
(09:53):
And once I included other people in, honestly, in my thinking, it changed everything.
And having supportive organizations as well, like Miss Kimmage Canada or a community or
your family that really supports you when you're feeling down, whenever I felt like
(10:14):
I was struggling with my body image or I was struggling with my confidence, my family and
obviously Miss Teenage Canada, the organization, my national director, Michelle and my team,
they're so supportive and I honestly wouldn't be here without them.
For me who's not in that kind of world in that industry, it's very easy to assume that
(10:35):
all these pageant organizations or all these modeling organizations are the same.
It's very easy to assume that.
But hearing you say that it is important to find organizations and there are organizations
that can't support you.
They won't degrade you in any way.
They'll actually celebrate you for who you are and help you glow and come out in a beautiful
(10:56):
way and be yourself in that organization.
So I think that's a very important stereotype.
We're breaking down here because it's very easy to assume that.
And I'm so glad that you found an organization that did support you because just as there
are good organizations, I can imagine that just in any field, there are organizations
(11:17):
that can be not so supportive and just a shout out to all the people who are involved with
those organizations.
You're not alone.
You said that now you're good, but you did face those concerns with body image and it's
just something I'm not even in that field, but I remember myself experiencing those feelings
(11:37):
too, especially as I was growing up and my body was changing and it's ongoing too.
I'm 24 now and my body continues to change and it's something that you want to celebrate.
It's about what you said about being your own kind of beautiful and finding confidence
in that.
And I'm really glad that you found an organization and have support systems that can help you
(12:00):
reinforce that when you yourself feel down and you don't feel super beautiful because
we all have those moments.
We all do.
So I appreciate you sharing that.
And I guess relating to that question, do you think you ever faced rejections or feelings
of rejection or self doubt in the industry?
(12:21):
Yeah, did you ever experience those?
And if you're comfortable sharing, would you describe those experiences and how did you
deal with those feelings?
A thousand percent.
A thousand percent experience.
A thousand percent.
And I think, honestly, I love what you're doing with this podcast because for me, I've
(12:42):
always been so open about, yeah, I've been rejected.
Yeah, and I'll say it for the people in the back.
And on the other hand, I know people in this industry who are like, no, I haven't been
rejected.
And I think that's people everywhere.
It's just very difficult to admit to ourselves.
It is.
It is.
It is.
(13:02):
Yeah.
And I think that's a real piece of judgment coming from a place where it's like, I just
want to hear your story and I want to be able to learn something and I want to be able to
help other people.
And that's why I love what you're doing.
No, thank you because I've heard several people share in general that sometimes when they're
(13:23):
struggling or like, say, like university students, they're struggling, they could go
to student wellness services, they could go there.
And those are really helpful resources, but it's a whole different thing and it can be
helpful on the side to get a perspective of what other peers, like people who are in
your age range or like what they're going through and how they dealt with something similar
that you've been through as well.
(13:46):
Because it just shows that, okay, this person is similar to me.
They've experienced similar things and they've overcame that.
So I can overcome that too.
And it's peer support in a way.
I think it's a beautiful thing.
And I wasn't really sure what I was doing when I was starting this podcast.
I just felt like, I just felt like, I don't know, maybe call it intuition, call it a calling.
(14:07):
I don't know what it was, but it did really push me in that direction.
And now I'm doing something that I didn't even think I would be ever doing.
I'm interviewing people about their life and the rejections they went through.
And I hope it does make an impact and it helps people see that they're not alone and rejection
is not the end of the world because it could be just the beginning of something too.
(14:28):
Exactly.
Yeah, but thank you.
Thank you for telling me about that.
No, of course.
And like you were saying about starting the podcast, whether it was a calling or an intuition
or something like that, that's really in the unknown that I was talking about.
And not knowing where you're going, but just having that feeling in your heart that it's
meant to be is just such a beautiful thing.
(14:49):
And I'm so happy you found that.
Yeah, thank you.
Thank you.
Yeah, of course.
I kind of got away from the question.
I asked you, I'm sorry.
No, that was me.
Definitely.
I just wanted to appreciate you for a second.
Thank you.
Thank you.
I always, I take it.
I used to be very wary of compliments.
I used to make me uncomfortable, but now I try to, if one of my goals is to be like,
(15:12):
take it in and be like, thank you.
But remaining humble.
Yeah, of course.
Well, I hope I didn't make you uncomfortable.
No, no, no.
I love compliments.
It builds my confidence.
Good.
That's what we're trying to do here.
Yeah, exactly.
Yeah.
Lead by example, right?
Exactly.
Exactly.
So yeah, the question was, do you ever face rejections or like feelings of rejection or
(15:37):
self doubt in the industry?
And you said a thousand percent.
So yeah, go ahead.
It started before pageantry, before modeling, before anything.
It started in school.
It started in elementary school and I found that it was constantly picked on, bullied.
(15:58):
And as I continued to grow up, I felt as though it was more about me being half-Filipina.
Being half-Filipina and born in Canada, I felt as though when I was growing up and I
was trying to find a group that could support me and could want it to be my friend almost.
(16:19):
It was like, when I went to more of a Filipino structured group, I felt too Canadian.
I felt outcasted.
But being not completely white, whatever I felt as though I was reaching for a more different
group, I felt outcasted there.
(16:39):
So not only did I feel upset that I was being bullied, that was my first setback in the
feeling of rejection.
And it's starting from a young age.
I carried into junior high and I had a really hard time finding friends and when I did find
(16:59):
a friend, I'd mess it up somehow because I wasn't confident myself.
I was like, oh, this person is just going to leave me.
This person is talking bad about me.
This person is, they have other friends.
They don't like me.
I felt these thoughts constantly in my head and it completely diminished myself.
But that's why when I was talking about going into pageantry, I did not want to do it.
(17:28):
That ties into it.
And I felt as though there was the stereotype on pageantry where a pageant girl gets put
on this pedestal and just is viewed as perfect.
She has it all together, she doesn't have any bad experiences.
Exactly.
And these pageant girls have these big crowns, they're pretentious.
(17:51):
That was my thought process going into it because that was where my self-esteem was
at because of my childhood and everything that I experienced at the time.
So that was probably my first rejection.
It carried on for a really long time and I'm honestly just getting over it now.
(18:11):
So I'm being honest, like over the past year.
And the reason why is because I created Hero Canada.
Right.
And to you bullying online platform that I created about a year and a half ago now.
And I just use that platform to spread awareness about bullying and spread awareness about
(18:33):
how it's intertwined with pageantry and pageantry isn't about this girl with a crown and a sash
on a pedestal who thinks she's perfect or has her life together.
It's not about that.
That crown goes beyond the physical appearance of it.
It goes deeper.
It goes into the way you can use that crown to be in front of little girls and share these
(18:56):
experiences that it's okay to not be okay.
Like the cliche.
But it's not just a cliche.
It's so genuine.
And I think that if these little girls started to see the imperfections and started to realize
that everybody has them and it's okay and being your own kind of beautiful, that's what
(19:18):
the crown represents.
It doesn't represent being perfect and it doesn't represent being all knowing and just
overall amazing almost.
It's just like it's a symbol for these little girls and these kids who feel bullied and who
(19:41):
feel alone and feel distressed because they're going through the same thing I did and that's
why I created Hero and that's why I use my crown and my sash to be in the community,
to help these little kids, to talk to them, to have them understand that it goes beyond
the physical appearance of it.
Yeah.
Okay, let's just process everything.
(20:02):
You said it's just so beautiful and I don't even know where to start.
First of all, you're amazing.
Oh gosh.
Yes, the fact that you turned, there's the saying, pain into purpose because even though
rejection suck and I'm so sorry that you were bullied and doesn't feel nice.
I've had my share of experiences and it sucks and it just when you're already going through
(20:27):
your stuff and then there's people who even undermine you even further that just adds
to your low self-esteem and the fact that you experienced that, I'm sorry, but the fact
that you use that experience and turn it into something meaningful to help little girls
and people in the community to build Hero Canada, that's just truly beautiful and we
(20:50):
don't want to romanticize rejection here because in this case especially because bullying
sucks, but the fact that you got something out of it and it did frame you into doing
this project and it framed you into the person you are today and it made you in a way maybe,
maybe it made you more empathetic to what they're going through because you remember
(21:11):
that pain, you remember that feeling and you remember how that affected you at the time
and the fact that you just said that you were just getting over it just shows the reality
of how some rejections like in this case bullying is a social form of rejection, social rejection,
how sometimes it takes a long time to get over it because rejections like this they
(21:32):
feel personal, bullying that can really scar I feel that can really have an impact.
You're very real for sharing that you're just getting over that some of that pain that you've
experienced and it's true, I can understand that and the fact that you turn that into
such a beautiful project and you've made meaning in the community because of it just shows
how we can use rejection to reframe us even though they do suck in the moment, but they
(22:00):
do help us in a way in the future to do something meaningful.
So thank you so much.
Thank you so much for sharing that experience of yours.
I appreciate that and you're so right, bullying does beat up scar and it does fall into your
future but when take it and you're able to really understand it and grasp what you experienced
(22:23):
and how you can use it to do something and like you said pain into purpose.
Yeah, exactly.
And when I started this podcast, I didn't know why I wanted to do it.
I just felt like I did.
But in the process, I hope that I helped people, but I for sure know I helped myself in that.
So in a way, it's just a nice way of processing what happened and it makes me feel more empowered
(22:47):
because instead of being stuck in that pain, which is very tempting sometimes, you're like,
okay, let's just make small baby steps, see what comes out of it and turn it into something
that can help people because by sharing my experience, it can be very therapeutic, but
also other people hear it.
So it's like a win-win.
You're really helping yourself and you're helping others process it, what just happened
(23:10):
and how to move on from it in a healthy way.
So and maybe for you was a similar thing when you were starting this project, maybe in a
way it was healing a part of you that was still wounded from those bullying experiences
that you had.
So I don't know, there's just so many layers to this.
Yeah, you're so right.
When we talk about rejections and we talk about how bullying was just a scar because it affected
(23:38):
my self-esteem so much when I was rejected in the future.
It made it so much harder.
So when I got to compete for Philippines, part of me was so excited because as a kid,
like I said, I felt like an outcast.
I didn't feel like I belonged.
Now I represent this national title at an international stage.
(24:00):
I placed top 10 internationally and although it's amazing because it's top 10 out of the
many countries that are there, I still felt awful when I didn't place.
Philippines has a reputation.
They are a documentary powerhouse and wearing that title across my chest.
(24:21):
It was incredible and when I felt as though I didn't do it justice, I carried that with
me.
I was constantly thinking about it and I also experienced bullying at the national stage.
On the live stream, there were all comments about me and my weight and what I was wearing
and I wasn't open about that at the time.
(24:44):
Just being a point of that title and that was my first international title and I didn't
know what to do at the time.
I didn't know if I should spread awareness or post these comments or respond to them
or anything like that.
I think that's what bullying does to you.
It just leaves you so confused.
It leaves you feeling so lost.
Did I do something to deserve this?
(25:05):
Was there something that I did sometime leading up to this point that made me deserve these
negative comments or accusations or anything like that because that's how I was feeling
at that time after I walked off that stage and I opened my phone for the first time.
There were still comments from people that I didn't even know that were like the reason
(25:27):
you didn't place is because you're too overweight or your dress was just a right.
It was awful.
It was so awful and at the time, at the time I think I was around 15.
Oh, not that it hurts any less when you're older but like, oh, it's just.
I know.
I'm so sorry you went through that.
That sucks.
(25:48):
It's all good.
But after that, I competed again.
I did it again.
I went to a different pageant, still international and I wore Canada across my chest this time
and I competed at Supermodel International in Thailand and I ended up getting first runner
up and I went into this pageant with a different mindset.
(26:12):
After team universe and feeling as though I was rejected and feeling I was denied, I
had such an incredible support system.
My team, SEI models, they supported me, they allowed me to compete again, even though my
self-worth was down the drain, they uplifted me and they taught me that I can do anything
(26:41):
that I said I might do.
And although I felt denied, one of my idols, one of my role models in the pageantry world,
Catriona Gray, she was missing in person in 2018, she's from the Philippines, she said
you're denied, you're only redirected.
When I have a feeling of rejection and I don't want a pageant or I get first runner up, I
(27:07):
don't see it as something where I'm denied.
It just wasn't meant for me and that's okay.
Everything has to be made for me or has to be mine, that the winner, Vietnam, that one
the year that I competed and got first runner up holding her hand, I saw her go on stage
and I saw her go on to amazing things after that and that is good enough.
(27:35):
After that, what did I do?
I don't even know anymore.
I'm just like, I'm rambling here.
No, no, you're not, you're sharing such, trust me, what you're sharing is good.
Do you see me like, I'm just like holding my heart.
Your storytelling is top notch.
And let me circle back around to my current title.
(27:55):
When I competed for Miss Junior Team Calgary and What's Spectral, Alberta, like I was talking
about, that qualified me to compete at Miss Teenage Canada for the first time in 2021.
And so I went on to compete in the summer.
It was August.
I was contestant number one from Alberta.
(28:15):
I still remember every single detail about that.
This top five, that was another redirection.
It just wasn't meant for me at the time.
And then I went on to compete internationally after that, 20s.
And I went to a fashion week.
I was traveling and then this year I was like, you know what, let's do it again.
(28:37):
Even though it was technically rejection and it just wasn't meant for me at that time.
I would now with my platform in Hero Canada and everything that I'm doing, I felt secure
in the place where, you know what, let's do it again.
Let's do it again with a different mindset because remember, I didn't want the pageant
initially.
(28:58):
I just want to do any of that now with this love that I have for it.
Like I could use this title for something amazing, for something incredible to turn
my pain into purpose like you were saying.
And as Miss Teenage Canada says, to find your own kind of beautiful.
And when I competed again, I came in with my team this year and they prepared me.
(29:26):
They trained me hours and hours of training that they set aside for me.
I'm so beyond thankful.
And I ended up winning.
And that was the first time, honestly, since being bullied and since all these three directions
where something in my heart felt secure.
That was the first time that I felt as though I won something and I was able to just earn
(29:50):
it.
And it took hours of training and crying and dieting and everything to just feeling
ๅฉๅฉ my successor put the crown on my head.
I couldn't believe it.
I was shaking and it was, it's crazy.
The journey, the journey you went through is just, you know, you did find your own
(30:18):
kind of beautiful.
You did discover that and you, you always were beautiful and you always did have that
worth.
You just, you just didn't see it at the time.
And who can blame you because because you've gone through so much
of going online at the time when the Philippines when you place top 10,
that's an accomplishment in itself.
That's that's amazing.
(30:39):
But but it's really about our perception, right?
And the perception of other people and how you were influenced by what people
said about you and who who wouldn't be.
It's just so difficult.
And for being a 15 year old girl having gone through that.
But you know, it is a part of your life and it is what happened.
And now you are where you are today.
(31:00):
And you probably you're more grounded in your positive self image.
And you have more confidence than probably a lot of people do because of the things
you went through.
And because of the things you went through, you're just kind of like, OK,
I've got to refrain my mindset.
And for me, this was when I was rejected from medical school.
(31:20):
I was I was very self critical.
I was very judgmental towards myself.
And but I'm like, I either have to refrain my mindset and have to become more
self compassionate or I will I will crush myself from the inside.
And, you know, you have to make that choice.
Either crush yourself or you become stronger in a way you're there for yourself.
(31:40):
Like you're there.
You show up for yourself no matter what happens.
And that's what happened to you.
And I'm so glad to hear that you've you finally felt it.
You felt secure in that win.
I mean, you are a winning personality, winning lady in overall.
Like you've been that it's just it took you time to see it.
(32:01):
And I'm so glad you did.
I'm so glad you reached that point.
And I'm so glad their organization like Miss Teenage Canada was there for you
to help you see that surrounding yourself intentionally with people who do support you.
Well, hopefully that that did help you and that contributed to you finding yourself again
and finding and rediscovering your self worth because we all have it.
(32:22):
We just don't see it sometimes, especially when we feel like we've been rejected
and those things happen.
But, you know, that experience that you had framed you into a stronger being
into a stronger woman.
And, you know, that helped you become more stronger and place boundaries faster.
And, you know, you've just learned so much throughout the way and it will definitely
(32:45):
help you down the line when you face future difficulties, when you face future setbacks.
There is hope and eventually you can move on.
It just it takes time and patience and self compassion and coming to that place
of self love for yourself.
So thank you for sharing your story.
It's truly beautiful and thank you for being so vulnerable and it's really brave, you know,
(33:06):
and coming on this podcast on this platform to share what you've been through.
It's inspiring.
First of all, for me, it's inspiring for our listeners as well.
Because, you know, as we were talking earlier, people face rejections, but no one likes to
admit that to other people, let alone like admit it to themselves.
So the fact that you're here and you're sharing this definitely feels like part of
(33:27):
you have moved on from it and you do feel more secure.
So I think that's beautiful.
And just just thank you for being here.
Thank you for having me.
I really appreciate that.
Just like feeling appreciated for being vulnerable is such a good compliment.
And I think being in this pageantry world, I've learned how to be vulnerable and it
(33:49):
wasn't always like that.
It wasn't like after Teen Universe, like I was saying, I shut it down.
I did not want to talk about it.
And I just want to set the record straight that my body was changing.
I was 15 and anybody listening who feels that they are in that spot right now,
(34:10):
don't feel as though that it's a setback.
It's not anything that's setting you back.
If it has to do with your weight or your self confidence, it's not setback.
It's just you change it.
It's you finding your own kind of people.
Nice.
I love it.
We'll keep coming back to that.
I love it.
I honestly love it.
And like being Miss Teenage Canada, like that's what I want to keep talking about.
(34:34):
That's my, honestly, one of my purposes as a type of person is to be
just a type of older.
So if you talk to me and be prepared, you will always hear that.
Yes.
Yes.
It's okay.
We need to hear it.
We need to hear more of that message in the world.
Yeah.
It just really helps hearing that.
(34:55):
I've heard it and we've talked before about this and I've heard this go,
but every time I hear it, just my heart flutters a little bit because it's just,
it's beautiful and it's always a good thing to keep in the back of your mind.
No matter who you are, no matter where you are, what position you're in,
you're your own kind of beautiful.
And that's just great.
Yeah.
And, you know, now that you feel more secure and you've gone through that
(35:18):
crazy experience and that's such a young age.
How now, how do you balance striving for excellence?
And you have so many goals and on the horizon and you have projects going on.
How do you balance striving for excellence while allowing yourself the grace to
fail and learn? Because a lot of people can find the balance between those things.
(35:39):
And I'm one of those people.
Sometimes I can be really hard on myself when I feel like I just failed.
And that fear of failure can sometimes prevent me from pursuing my dreams or
start sabotaging myself.
And I guess that goes to many people as well.
So how do you find that balance?
How do you strive for excellence and you want, you know, you want that ambition,
(36:00):
you want things and, but also, you know, allowing yourself to kind of say,
it's okay if something didn't come to me, that that's fine.
Yeah.
That's a good question.
And some context for that and how it initially helped me and is looking at my
mom for an example.
My mom was definitely inspiration.
She works so hard.
(36:22):
She works two part times and she's here.
She's cooking for us.
She's supporting us.
She's like, honestly, the epitome of time management growing up.
I saw that and now with everything I do with the traveling and with the working,
like I was working four part time jobs at one point plus traveling plus school
(36:44):
before I graduated.
And my mom was the reason I was able to time manage that just being able to look
at her and knowing that like, wow, she is so strong in herself and being able to
do that.
But on the opposite hand, would be able to strive for ambition.
Certain things just need more attention.
And what I had to learn, honestly, the hard way was it's okay to step back and take
(37:09):
yourself out of certain situations that aren't supporting your ambitions that you're
striving for.
And when it came to work, I was working four part time jobs at one, at one point.
And I was still wanting to travel and I was still wanting to do all these things like
go to fashion week and I was like, but I need the money, but I need the money.
(37:31):
But part of me was also burnt out.
And I had to realize that it goes beyond the money and how am I supposed to go and do
these things that I love and want to support my team for when I physically can't get out
of the bed or I'm stuck at work doing an eight hour shift and then have to go to work
(37:54):
right after that.
And just the idea of being able to take yourself out of a situation and know that you're not
going to be judged.
You're not going to be not going to offend anybody.
You're not harming anybody else.
You are supporting yourself for the goals that you want.
And as much as I talk about not being selfish and thinking about other people and other
(38:20):
people's perception, that's the one thing that I would say.
Honestly, you need to think about yourself in today's society when there's so many things
going on, there's so many opportunities.
There's so many things that can burn you out and have to experience these things and get
out there, get in the community volunteer, do all these things.
If I'm working for part time jobs and I can only speak for myself because my financial
(38:46):
situation is different than everybody else's.
I recognize that, but it goes beyond the financial aspect.
If you're doing something that you feel as though isn't benefiting you, take yourself
out of the situation.
Do yourself a favor.
Do something else that can contribute to your main goal.
(39:08):
And for me, at the time that was going to Miss Tanaige Canada and I had to sacrifice a couple
of jobs, I had to sacrifice certain friends, certain people in my life to be able to reach
that goal.
But at the end of the day, that's what got me there.
And now I can use all that energy that I was putting into other things that weren't benefiting
(39:32):
me to something better.
No, that's a really good message to share.
Being able to balance that and being able to give things up and not feel as though you're
rejected.
I think we also have to look at the other side of it, like not only rejection, but taking
yourself out of situations, intentionally taking yourself out of situations that aren't
(39:54):
benefiting you and are honestly causing yourself harm and maybe other people harm.
No, I definitely agree.
There's like nothing else to add to it.
So yeah, thank you for sharing that.
What would you recommend to listeners currently going through a rejection or fear of being
rejected?
What are some best ways we can use to overcome it?
(40:16):
And how do we build confidence and resilience in the process?
I know it's a loaded question, but start where you like.
Whenever I talk about things, like whenever we're having a conversation, it's often personal
experience.
And I know other people have it worse than I do.
But that goes with comparison, like we talked about and how I responded to that and how
(40:41):
I'm going to respond to this is you can be your own kind of beautiful.
And I know it sounds repetitive, but it's so important to get it out there that if you
feel as though you're struggling and you're going through something, the first step is
to realize that it's okay and it's your own journey and it's your own path.
(41:05):
And I think it's important to stay on your own path and allow time to heal these things
and allow yourself to realize that it's okay to be where you're at right now.
It's okay to struggle and just discovering your own beauty in it and your own light in
the situation is a start.
(41:27):
And no matter what you're going through, you're obviously not alone.
There's many platforms, there's many services that can support you.
And that's why I created Hero, right?
If you're feeling as though you are being bullied or honestly, if you're feeling as though
you are in a position where maybe you're bullying, it's okay to look at these things and just
(41:51):
understand it and take it all in and realize that these things that we've always seen on
TV or on social media that are just so intimidating, these are real resources that you can use.
People are working and striving to be able to help you.
If I were to say anything to any of these people, it's not only be your own kind of
(42:15):
beautiful but don't be afraid to step out and don't be afraid to be vulnerable because
there's beauty in vulnerability and there's beauty in honesty and being able to share
your experiences.
It will help you but it helps other people to help you, other people to be able to learn
(42:37):
to help other people.
It's a community effort and know that you are not alone at any point in time, ever.
Yeah, that's great.
Thank you.
Thank you for sharing that.
And yeah, like you said, it's allowing yourself to be your own kind of beautiful and sometimes
we don't want to, especially with the rejection just happened or a setback just happened,
(43:02):
something bad in your life has happened.
You don't want to hear that when it just happened because you're sad and that's okay
to be sad and accept all your emotions but in that moment whatever you're feeling is
beautiful because it's a part of who you are and you're being honest with yourself about
what you're experiencing.
I think that's a big part of overcoming rejection like don't or your setbacks, like don't deny
(43:27):
it, let yourself be what your body wants you to be in that moment.
Just experience it and healing will naturally come to you and surrounding yourself with
the people who will support you and like you said, I think practically it's very good
to refer to resources.
There's hotlines, there's like your platform like Hero Canada and Kids Help Phone.
(43:54):
Those are all things that you can refer to and there's people who can help you and like
you said, you're not alone and I feel like success, it's very honorable to strive for
success and it's very good that people strive for it and they're trying to find themselves
and go after their goals but success is a very broad term and it's about aligning with
(44:18):
your strengths and aligning with your values to see what your definition of success is
and don't let anyone define or tell you what success looks like.
You have to discover it for yourself and it may not come right away.
Sometimes it comes through trying things and saying, okay, this is not for me.
This is what I should be going for and with your story, you know, you've tried several
(44:39):
different organizations and you've landed on this teenage Canada that helps you so much
and that's when you knew, okay, I found my people.
I found people who can support me and I feel like that's a big part of fostering resilience
and confidence is surrounding yourself with people who bring out the best in you.
I find that it can be difficult sometimes depending on what situation you're in but
(45:03):
that's one of the first steps to building confidence and resilience too.
So yeah.
It's beautiful that idea of success and how you define success and so when we talk about
feeling as though you're struggling and you're feeling rejected, let's take a moment to realize
what you went through to feel that and your idea of rejection can be someone's idea of
(45:27):
success and if you take it from this mentality of my cup is half empty to half full, it changes
everything almost and when I competed for this teenage Canada the second time, I went
into it with no expectations, I didn't know that I was going to be able to go internationally
(45:53):
after that.
All I knew was that I was going in with a fresh mentality and look where it took me.
I think that when we change our mindsets to what is my definition of success, my definition
of success wasn't set on if I win this teenage Canada, that's the point of success.
(46:16):
It wasn't that it was me going into it having a good week, meeting these pageant queens
and just being there, being present and doing everything that I did but intentionally this
time that was my idea of success and the crown that was a cherry on top.
So that's everything for me.
(46:36):
So when you mentioned that I was like that's so beautiful, you're so correct.
I love everything you just said.
Thank you.
I think it just is beautiful that it does apply to everyone really and you can take
that advice as you want.
So it's like based on what situation you are in, we can give all the advice we want that
(46:58):
we think is true to us but I find that it's universal enough that anyone who's listening
to it can apply to their lives.
Either way, do have faith in yourself and do surround yourselves with people who do support
you and find your definition of success.
They're almost coming to the end of the episode so it's a good message to almost end on.
Any last thoughts or main takeaways you have for our listeners, Ariana, before we wrap
(47:23):
up?
One more time, I want to say be your own kind of beautiful.
I mean that I'm always going to say if you need me, you know I always talk about it.
If you are feeling as though you are rejected like Catriona Gray said once, you're not
denied, you're redirected and if you're feeling as though you're struggling, it's okay.
(47:45):
It's okay to be in those feelings and it's okay to do that but just know that your time
will come and you will find beauty in your pain and that's okay.
Beautiful.
Beautiful.
And where can the listeners connect with you in case they want to learn more about your
story or they have questions or want to just be in touch?
Yeah, so if you're interested in finding my pages, I have Instagram and Facebook.
(48:11):
Facebook is just my name, ariana ramsey and Instagram is ra.m37 if you're interested
in looking at Teenage Canada or Hero Canada.
It's just the names for Instagram.
So hero.canada or Teenage Canada on Instagram.
Great.
We'll make sure to definitely put that in the show notes too.
(48:32):
Thank you.
Thank you so much, Ariana, for joining me on the podcast.
It was such a pleasure talking to you and learning about your journey truly.
For many people, it might be easy to think and tempting to think, oh, Ariana is Miss
Teenage Canada.
She has it all.
She's beautiful, smart, successful.
What can she know about rejection?
But Ariana is certainly successful and her future is bright.
(48:57):
Behind that image of success, she has faced her own share of rejections and painful experiences
that have shaped her into the incredible person she is today.
Rejection is a universal experience and behind every success story, there's often a story
of failure or rejection.
So as cheesy as that sounds, don't be afraid of failure.
Embrace it.
(49:17):
It does help you grow personally and professionally, even though it doesn't feel like that, especially
when you're just in the midst of it, or in the midst of that feeling.
You never know where it might lead you as rejection is often just redirection.
Of course, it's easier said than done, but that's okay.
We're all still learning together and it's a lifelong journey.
I'd love to hear from what you listeners all thought of this episode.
(49:39):
Feel free to DM me to share your thoughts or suggest topics you have been covering future
episodes.
And if you'd like to support the podcast and the content, you can donate at the link by
MiaCoffee.com slash ValeriaRusnak.
I don't remember if that's the right one, but I'll make sure to put that in the show
notes too.
This has been ValeriaRusnak, the host of the Rejected Pre-Met podcast.
(50:01):
I thank you all for listening and I will see you next time.
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