July 31, 2025 • 35 mins
Summary
In this conversation, Michael Gomez, a seasoned real estate broker in Nashville, shares insights into the emotional complexities of buying and selling homes. He discusses the misconceptions about realtors, the emotional attachments clients have to their homes, and the importance of navigating these feelings during transactions. Michael emphasizes the need for effective communication, negotiation strategies, and the lessons he's learned throughout his 14-year career. He also offers valuable advice for new agents entering the real estate industry.
Key Takeaways
- Realtors are not just salespeople; they guide clients through emotional decisions.
- Understanding clients' motivations is key to successful transactions.
- Emotional attachments to homes can complicate negotiations.
- Effective communication is crucial in real estate.
- Negotiation requires finding common ground between buyers and sellers.
- Real estate can be a stressful process, but it's important to stay calm.
- New agents should seek mentorship and not rush into the industry.
- Specializing in a niche can set agents apart from the competition.
- Patience and trust are essential in real estate dealings.
- Letting go of control can lead to better outcomes in negotiations.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Dr. Shay (00:01):
Welcome back to The Resolution Room, where we turn
(00:22):
tension into transformationthrough clarity, connection, and
consistency.
I'm your host, Dr.
Nashay Lowe, and this is aspace where we explore what's
really underneath the momentsthat challenge us and how they
can lead to something morehonest, more human, and more
whole.
So let's get into it.
Buying or selling a home is oneof the most emotional
(00:42):
transactions many people willmake.
But what we don't often see ishow much relational work
realtors do behind the scenes toget the deal done and how that
teaches us something deeperabout tension, trust, and moving
forward.
In a time when everyone wantsto invest, flip, or get into
real estate, we're pulling backthe curtain on what's really
(01:03):
involved when you buy or sellproperty.
This episode isn't about markettrends or mortgage rates.
It's about the people work.
That's the negotiations, theemotional pivots, the high
stakes decisions, and themoments where things nearly fall
apart.
Because real estate isn't justabout buildings.
It's about buildingrelationships.
And what it takes to do thatwell has lessons for all of us,
(01:27):
no matter what we're trying tomove through.
Michael Gomez, can you pleaseintroduce yourself to the
people?
Mike Gomez (01:34):
Michael Gomez, real estate broker here in Nashville,
Tennessee, owner of HiveNashville, father, friend,
husband, imperfect human.
Dr. Shay (01:46):
So let's start here.
What's one thing about being arealtor that most people don't
realize?
Mike Gomez (01:53):
I think a lot of people have this idea of, I'm
not going to slam the carsalesman industry, but they come
in with their guards upthinking that a realtor is a
person that's there to sell themthe most expensive house or to
just make a commission, notreally caring about you know,
(02:15):
the service that they'reproviding and everything that is
implicated with it.
So I think there's a lot ofmisconceptions with what is it
that we do?
Are we needed in this industry?
You know, how professional arewe?
I would say like in everyprofession, there's good and bad
apples.
I definitely will say there'smore good than bad.
But the few will stand outreally big and say, hey, yeah, I
(02:38):
got this realtor and all theycare about was sending me this
houses that I couldn't afford,yada, yada.
I think like less and less wesee We see that in an industry.
But if you would ask me onething that people might not know
about industry is that we notonly provide a service of
helping you find a suitable homeor this rental or an investment
(03:01):
or whatever, but that we'reactually, if the agent's really
good, if the realtor's reallygood, they're helping your
thought process.
They're telling you like, hey,you should not buy this house.
Even if you don't make acommission, it's like, hey,
there's something here.
Look at the future value ofthis.
Or you have a highway here.
When it comes time to sell it,this might be a difficult thing.
(03:23):
How long are you going to behere for?
We have the whole thoughtprocess.
And a lot of times peoplerealize that they start wanting
one thing.
And after a couple of showingsand conversations with their
agents, they change their minds.
Like, oh, you know what?
I thought that's, I thoughtthis is what I wanted, but now
that talking to you and hearingyou out and knowing the
community, how you know it andthe areas, like, I think I want
(03:45):
to be somewhere else or thistype of other home.
So it's not just the service,but we help your thought process
to like determine if you'regoing to make a really good
decision, you know,
Dr. Shay (03:55):
or a regrettable one.
So, okay.
So yeah, you already kind ofgracefully navigated us into
this, this sort of heart of theconversation.
So yeah, Buying or selling ahome isn't just about the
property.
It's often tied to identity,memories, and big life changes.
So how do you help clientsnavigate those emotional layers
(04:16):
while staying focused on theprocess?
Mike Gomez (04:18):
I always ask, and I believe all my agents, like,
hey, why are you selling?
Or why are you moving to thisarea?
A lot of clients that I get arefrom California.
And a lot of times I'll belike, hey, it might be a good
idea if you want to rent for ayear.
And you've never even been toNashville.
What's the rush of buying?
Yeah, you don't want to wastethe money of rent, throw it
(04:41):
away.
But in a sense, it's more like,hey, you don't even know if
you're going to like it here.
I mean, I think you will.
I'm sure you will.
But that's how I see it.
Dr. Shay (04:51):
Yeah, yeah.
Can you recall an emotionalchallenge that you've seen catch
people off guard during a realestate deal?
Mike Gomez (04:58):
Yeah, so houses carry a lot of emotions.
I don't know if you ever heardthe song, The House That Built
Me, that Miranda Lambert madefamous.
It won a Grammy that year, afew years back.
It's an amazing story of a ladythat's walking by.
She stumbles into her oldneighborhood, and she wants to
(05:19):
go visit the house that she grewup, the house that built her.
And she's asking the lady,like, hey, I know you don't know
me from Adam, but thosehandprints in the concrete,
those are mine, and my oldpuppy's buried in the backyard.
So like houses are tied up torelationships and upbringing,
sometimes good, sometimes bad.
(05:40):
So yeah, a lot of times I haveto help the client understand
that, hey, like let's say we'rein a transaction and we're like
$10,000 apart and my client isselling the house and they're
ready to sell it so they canmove on with their lives.
They want to move to NorthCarolina and they're already
making some money.
A lot of times I have to belike, hey, like it's, is $10,000
(06:03):
enough to hold you fromcontinuing your journey?
You know, and then people likesit down and marinate and
sometimes like, yeah, you'reright.
Like I'm ready to move on.
And, you know, I'm just ready.
I'm making some money alreadyhere.
So like, let's go.
You know, but other people getreally tied up.
Also, a lot of sellers believethat their houses are the most
beautiful houses.
Of course.
(06:24):
Oh, my house is this and hasthat.
I'm like, yeah, well, let'slook at the competition.
Yeah.
And then I open up, hey, lookat this.
Look at this hardware floors.
Look at this upgrades.
Not to show them that theirhouse is a lower level, but
let's get real here.
Because I am known for beingsuper, uber real.
I'll be like, hey, this is aterrible time to sell a house
(06:45):
right now.
If you consider renting it andthen moving on and we can give
it a shot next year.
I'll tell people whatever Iwould do.
Dr. Shay (06:54):
Yeah.
Mike Gomez (06:54):
You know, and I've sold over a thousand homes.
I'm not going to say I've seeneverything, but I have a lot of
experience and I'm also aninvestor.
So I own several homes myself.
I've moved like 14 times, youknow, before we built our house
here where we live now.
So it's like...
Which
Dr. Shay (07:08):
is beautiful, by the way.
Mike Gomez (07:09):
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
So, yeah, there's a lot of...
There's so many emotions.
The other day I assisted acouple that were getting a
divorce and it was...
I'm going to say probably themost amicable like divorce I've
ever seen.
They were like joking with eachother, ready to move on and no
drama, no nothing.
And, and they were probablygoing to normally, cause they
(07:32):
were not like emotionallyattached to the home.
They were probably ready tomove on and great.
And, you know, but a lot oftimes there's a lot of like, and
a lot of stuff in there, you
Dr. Shay (07:43):
know?
I can imagine how you deal withmore of the opposite of that.
Mike Gomez (07:45):
It's like the thing between a house and a home.
And when does a house become ahome?
And the moment there has been ahome, then, you know, it
carries a lot of emotions.
You know, those walls carry,you know, they carry stories and
things, you
Dr. Shay (07:59):
know?
Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
And...
Have you ever had to help aclient sort of like let go of
either the home itself or maybean unrealistic expectation or
even just a fear of the change?
And how did you?
Mike Gomez (08:11):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, totally.
I've been in situations whereI've been like, you know, in
disagreement with the seller andpricing.
And I'm always, I always have alittle bit of wiggle room to
say, okay, well, you know what?
You think your house should bethere.
I believe based on data andmarketing conditions and the
professional that I am, that itshould be over here.
However, Let's give it a shotwhere you are.
(08:32):
It's always easier to come downthan to go up.
And if, you know, that isn'tthe case, that is actually
realistic.
I've had clients, they're likea hundred thousand dollars.
off.
And I'm like, listen, I'm aboutto spend a lot of money in
media.
I spend a lot of money in adsand things like that.
I'm not just taking picturesand putting it in MLS.
So like, if I'm going to workwith you, you're going to work
(08:54):
with me.
I need to make sure that I'mgoing to sell your house because
it's going to take time.
And it's time that I could begiving a client that's
realistic, ready to sell.
So it's like, What would youlike to do?
And so I've always tried to bevery, very upfront with people.
And I think in the beginning,when you're a new agent, you
don't have that because you'rehungry and you're starting and
(09:15):
you're just happy that you got alisting.
Where as you progress and youbecome more successful and have
more experience, you startlearning sometimes that not all
listings are meant to be taken.
Not all clients are supposed towork.
I've had clients that have beenrude to me.
because I didn't pick up thephone while I was having dinner
or something like that.
(09:35):
And I'm like, I realized that Imight not be the right fit for
you.
And I don't work with thoseclients just straight up.
It's like, Hey, you don't oweme anything.
And some, some have gotten mada couple.
It hasn't happened much, butlike, Oh, I'm going to report
you to commission.
I'm like, this is the phonenumber.
Please give them a call andtell them whatever you want to
(09:56):
say.
Like, it's just what it is.
I'm not going to be intimidatedif you were rude to me or, or,
um, super unrealistic or Ididn't get back to you within
five minutes of you texting meor something like that.
It's just we just might not bea good fit.
You know, you might needsomebody that's that is like
brand new or something that'sjust ready to drop everything
(10:16):
like I used to do.
Something happened to me likethat earlier on in my real
estate career where I wassupposed to have breakfast with
my wife that day.
And randomly, some guy calledme.
I don't even know how he got mynumber.
It's like, oh, Mr.
Gomez, I'm out here in front ofa house and I want you to show
it to me because I'm going tobuy a house today.
I got up and I just startedgetting ready.
(10:37):
And my wife's like, what'shappening?
I'm like, woman, I'm going tobuy a house today.
You chill.
I'm going to, I'm going to gobring the bacon.
We're supposed to havebreakfast.
I know, but you know what?
I got to work it.
So I left her there and didn'ttake her to breakfast.
And I went, I show, I showthis, this house to this
gentleman.
And then I show him like five,eight, 10 other houses that day.
(10:58):
Do you think he bought a housethat day?
Do you think he bought a houseever with me?
No.
So that day I started learningabout boundaries in our
profession, which, again, thehungrier you are, the less
boundaries you'll have, andyou're going to have to learn
how most of us learn about lifein general, which is through the
(11:20):
heart, you know, heart things.
But from that day on, I startedbeing more picky.
I'm like, hey, you know what?
I cannot show it to you rightnow, but after 2 o'clock I'm
fine.
And you know what happens?
99.9% said, okay.
I'll see you after the time.
So it's like, I want to see itright now.
Right now I can't, but I cansee it.
I can show it to you in acouple hours or let me see if I
(11:41):
can find an agent.
Nothing happens.
They don't fire you.
They still buy the house.
Gosh,
Dr. Shay (11:47):
that's so funny.
And, you know, it's funny eventhinking about how this
conversation came to be.
So, you know, I think when mostpeople think of real estate,
they don't just think conflict,right?
But when I heard of what youdo, I thought, Thought of price
disputes, repair negotiations,delayed financing.
The conflict is baked into realestate, I imagine.
(12:08):
And so how do you prepareclients for the reality that
some tension is inevitable inthis process?
Because I imagine for somepeople, it's almost like a
honeymoon phase.
I'm going to go buy my dreamhouse.
I saved all my life or whateverit is.
How do you ground them?
Mike Gomez (12:22):
I mean, honestly, just being extremely honest,
I've had a client recently thatwas making low offers and he
made a low offer to a place andhe was like, he got really mad
that he didn't get the house,like $100,000.
And I was like, you know...
Yeah, the market right now, youhave the advantage, but not
every seller is in a positionthat they're willing to part
(12:45):
ways with a property.
A lot of them are just willingto ride it another year and
whatnot.
And this guy got really, reallylike worked up about it.
And I just kept it.
I just I'm not going to matchtheir energy.
If they come stressed, I am thecalm.
You know, if they come worried,I am the calm.
I'm always the calm.
I'm always the voice of reasonwhen there's a lot of stuff
going on, a lot of peoplegetting mad.
(13:06):
Why are they asking for allthis stuff?
When we tell them that way, I'mlike, they're just negotiating.
That means their agent's good.
That means their agent'ssaying, hey, I know that this
was supposed to be as is, but goahead and hit him for $2,500.
Hey, it's real estate.
Anything goes.
Then you can decide whether youwant to take it or not.
You can't just take it likepersonal.
(13:26):
You know where we get a lot ofdrama from, believe it or not?
Other agents.
Dr. Shay (13:31):
Oh, really?
Oh,
Mike Gomez (13:33):
my gosh.
Some agents take it sopersonal.
And I'm always reminding them.
I'm like, hey, listen, we don'thave to go about it this way.
I'm serving my client, but I'malso serving you and serving
your client.
So if you come at me likeyelling at me or upset because
the inspection brought a lot ofthings or whatever, first of
(13:55):
all, this is not your house, youknow?
It's not your house.
We just got to keep it whereit's like you're an amazing.
And if they're an amazingagent, I say, you're an amazing
agent.
You're working so hard for yourclient.
But there's a line that youdon't have to cross.
The line is like yelling at mefor something that I am
conveying information that myclient wants me to convey.
(14:15):
I know that you're emotionaland you're the best and all that
stuff, but we don't have to doit that way.
So we get a lot of feedback.
maybe I have 38 agents under meand every now and then an agent
calls me and says, hey, I'mdealing with this situation and
this agent made fun of my accentor all kinds of weird things
like I hear like out there.
And the weird thing is this,when the real estate market is
(14:40):
more balanced and all the agentsare making bank, like you don't
see a lot of that.
But when times are kind ofhard, like right now, I would
consider this hard times.
I will tell this to an agent ofmine, it's like, hey,
understand that There's a lot ofpeople stressed.
There's a lot of people aremaking a third of their income
from last year and the yearbefore.
And they might not planthemselves well to ride that
wave.
And then they're like edgy, youknow, and they're paying it
(15:02):
with you just like that.
They're paying it with you.
And I said, now don't matchtheir energy.
Keep yourself professional.
And if they cross the line,tell them they crossed the line
and that that is not acceptable.
And, uh, you know, And mostlikely they'll come and
apologize or they'll continue tobe what they are.
It's what it is.
You stay focused on yourtransaction.
And when you're done, go take ashot or go to the gym and cold
(15:24):
plunge, whatever it is you do tolike chillax.
Dr. Shay (15:26):
Right.
Gosh.
And when you're caught betweentwo parties who have opposing
needs, like let's say there'slike a seller unwilling to budge
and a buyer who feels maxedout, what's your approach to
finding common ground there?
Mike Gomez (15:41):
Oh, common ground is going to be, it's not going to
work.
It comes to a point inmediation or whatever, if we are
to help the seller understandthat this is a good offer right
now, that you should probablytake this, where they might be
thinking, yeah, you just want toget paid.
You want to get yourcommission.
Okay, I understand that.
And the buyer has said, hey,this is as far as I can go.
(16:03):
I mean, it just comes to like,hey, what do you want to do?
Dr. Shay (16:08):
The best solution that
Mike Gomez (16:09):
you can- Let's go pros and cons.
You take it, you think you'releaving money on the table or
you leave it and then we sit inthe market a couple months, a
couple more.
Where are you in your life?
What's your end goal?
That's really where I try tofocus.
What is your end goal here?
You're still in the house, butyou're trying to move on.
You're trying to close achapter.
(16:30):
You're trying to start writinga new one.
So is this worth you closingyour chapter?
or not, or keeping it open.
Really, I use that all thetime.
It's like, hey, becauseeverybody's closing a chapter
when they're closing a house,unless it's an investment
property.
It's less emotional or zeroemotion.
It's just numbers.
Like, I'm not going to takethat.
Yeah, I like that.
Let's go.
Homeowners?
Dr. Shay (16:54):
Sorry, go ahead.
Mike Gomez (16:55):
I was going to say, when it's homeowners, you're
going to be ready for emotions,and it's normal.
100%.
And I'll tell this to clients,too.
Like, hey, it's normal.
Even if this goes as planned,everything goes smooth, still
one of the most stressful thingsthat you can do in your life is
to buy a house.
It's a big purchase.
You're nervous.
You're, what if something goeswrong and can I afford this
payment?
There's so many questions likelingering when you're buying a
(17:17):
house.
So it's like, you know.
Dr. Shay (17:20):
Yeah.
At this point in, in being inNashville, are most of your
sales like for investment or arepeople, is it more like
traditional house buying andselling?
Mike Gomez (17:30):
So I mostly serve like developers that build like
entire neighborhoods.
Um, So I would say I'm stillmore with investors, but I'm
still seeing buyers every day.
Like this week, we've had threebuyers, one under contract, one
probably under contract today,and one that's probably going to
make an offer tomorrow.
So those three have beenregular homeowners.
Dr. Shay (17:50):
But
Mike Gomez (17:51):
I have a developer that has like 63 units that I
have to pre-sell soon and thingslike that.
So it's a good combination.
It keeps me very in the, Istill love, even though, again,
I'm a managing broker, I stilllove to buy and sell properties
for the people and hang out withbuyers and hang out with
sellers.
I still love it.
So I'm not just like, oh, I'mnot going to do this or
(18:11):
whatever.
No, I have an agent that helpsme with showings and things like
that.
But I'm still touching everyaspect, helping negotiating and
all that.
Dr. Shay (18:21):
Nice.
I'm curious and thinking aboutlike the lessons you've gained
from your career over time.
How long have you been doingthis again?
14
Mike Gomez (18:29):
years.
And
Dr. Shay (18:30):
actually, let's back up a minute.
How did you even get into this?
Mike Gomez (18:34):
Well, I was a guitar player in a Christian band
making a thousand bucks a month.
So when my wife and I decidedthat we wanted to expand and
have a family, have kids, I waslike, man, I really want to be
able to do something that I canContinue to play music and do my
ministry and make more moneybecause this is not going to be
(18:54):
enough to provide for a family.
So I went to Keller Williamsoffice in Spring Hill and I
asked the lady that was the teamleader.
I'm like, I got two questions.
You know, one, can you do thispart time and make money?
And she said, there are someagents that do this part time.
that make more money than theones that do it full time.
She's like, I don't know how itis.
Personality thing.
(19:15):
I'm like, okay, number two, doI have to come in and work at an
office every day?
She's like, again, there's somepeople that only come here to
get their checks that make moremoney than the people that are
here all day long.
I said, okay, where do I signup?
And then I did not have $1,500to my name.
And a friend of mine who's adoctor in New York lent me
$1,500 for me to get all myonline classes and everything.
(19:36):
And Of course I paid him back.
And then that's how I became anagent.
Then I started, I started ateam not knowing what starting a
team was.
I was just like playing musicin Nebraska and I would get an
online lead for a property and Iwould send it to a friend of
mine and say, Hey, that's anagent.
I'm like, Hey, you want to make50% of this?
The guy's ready or the lady'sready.
You got to go get in my house.
So they said, absolutely.
(19:57):
So, you know, I would work afew minutes and I would get paid
half of that transaction at theend of the day.
So I was like, this is great.
All I need to do is be on thephone and then pass them on to
somebody that I know they'regoing to take really good care
of.
So I slowly, I basicallystarted a team and that's how I
started getting.
I started working withinvestors.
Then I started buyinginvestment properties and then
(20:18):
became known for being more ofan investor-driven broker.
People wanted to build rentalportfolios and things like that
would come to me and say, hey, Iwant to buy my first rental or
my 10th rental.
Find me a good deal.
And that's what I would do.
Dr. Shay (20:32):
And where do I sign up?
Mike Gomez (20:34):
Exactly.
You got my number.
Let's go.
So
Dr. Shay (20:39):
what's one communication skill that you've
taken away in real estate thatyou now use in your personal
life?
Mike Gomez (20:47):
You have to be very upfront.
You have to be like realistic.
You also want to bend.
When you need to bend, if Itell somebody, hey, I can sell
your house for $600 and theywant me to list at $650, I'm not
going to back away and be like,oh, no, then find somebody.
No, I'm going to be like, allright, well, let's talk about
(21:09):
this.
How about I do go $650 and whatI like to do is I like to do 10
days for $650.
eight showings.
So if the first 10 days, wedon't have 10 showings or, or,
you know, just, there's just noactivity.
I was like, that's, we need tostart coming down in price.
(21:29):
It's just, it's not me.
It's not the house.
It's just, we missed the targetmarket because we went to, I
always say, Hey, I listed overthere, but, but in the case that
doesn't sell for that price,it's We don't want to have a
super long conversation onpricing because we already had
it and we're high.
Oh, somebody's going to comewith cash.
And yeah, they could.
It's true.
And sometimes they do.
(21:50):
And sometimes I'm wrong.
Sometimes I'm like, there's noway that's going to sell for
that.
And it does sell.
Most of the times, though, I'mright.
It sells for more or less.
Yeah.
Because this is the thing,again, is you look at the
current market conditions, youlook at what people are selling
in that particular neighborhood,and you're going to get really
close and you're going to seethe upgrades that that house has
(22:12):
versus something else.
You can price it maybe a littlebit less than the last house
that sold it was ready if youwant a quick sale.
So there are things that canindicate you like that, except
right at this second, and thisis the season that we're in
right now, at least in theentire country, that you can
list a house and you don't knowwhen it's going to sell.
People say, well, how quick doyou sell it?
(22:34):
I'm like, I know we're going todo everything that we can to
sell it, and it'll move or themarket will say we're not ready
for it yet or i um our reportcame from bank of america and
saying that 75 of home buyersare in the sidelines right now
75 so imagine imagine pricescome down a little bit imagine
(22:59):
rates come down boom buyers backin the market For you to even
find a house is going to bedifficult.
I mean, we don't build themthat fast.
So the healthiest market is abalanced market where things are
very even.
Right now, it's very uneven.
Nobody's buying.
Everybody's selling.
Dr. Shay (23:18):
Right.
So I picked up that you havegreat negotiation and
compromising skills.
Mike Gomez (23:25):
Yes.
That's
Dr. Shay (23:25):
what I picked up.
And so you've worked in highstakes, emotionally charged
environments, as we discussed.
So what has real estate taughtyou about patience, trust, and
letting go of control?
Mike Gomez (23:37):
Well, on patience, people that know me will tell
you that I'm extremely patient.
person.
Sometimes they don't evenunderstand it.
It's just like, I think I gotthat from my mom, but I think
that was the skill that I hadbefore real estate.
As far as trust, this businesshas shown me over and over that
(24:01):
you have to be very careful onwho you trust.
It's very, very careful.
If you're a home buyer, homeseller, investor, whatever,
there's still people there thatare not good people.
You know, they're going to makeyou do things or they're going
to give you bad checks andthey're going to like screw you.
So you really have to alwayskind of be with your guard up,
you know.
As far as like between buyersand sellers in the contracts, if
(24:24):
a seller agrees something, likethere's something that I do,
for example, let's say you'rethe buyer and I'm representing
you and there's a seller andwe're buying their house and
there's a list of repairs.
I always going to ask, I'malways going to get a quote for
that list to have a moneyfigure.
And I'm always going to try toget you that money.
And the reason I do that isbecause most of the conflicts,
(24:48):
once you're under contract, haveto do with inspection and
repairs.
The seller says, look at this.
This fan is fixed.
And you're like, that's notfixed.
It's got duct tape on it.
Well, it's fixed.
And just for something as smallas that can put a damper in an
entire negotiation that had beenso good.
up to the point on adisagreement on something was
(25:10):
fixed or not.
Or the grout color that youused to fix the things that we
never specified you didn't like.
Or something like that.
So I always try to see thepoints where I see that there
could be conflicts,conflict-prone zones, and I try
to mitigate those in thebeginning of the transaction.
(25:31):
Like, hey, we're just going tohave them give you money and
then you'll use your contractorNow you're dealing with that
contractor, not with the seller.
We don't have to deal with thatstuff.
Yeah.
A lot of times too, let me tellyou something else.
A lot of people want to selltheir house and say, hey, the
furniture is for sale also.
Immediately they go, this isgoing to be separate.
(25:52):
Meaning we're going to sell thehouse.
And once it's under contract,you're going to put sticky notes
on all the furniture withpricing.
And then those people are goingto come into the inspection and
then they're going to negotiatedirectly with you.
but you're going to let moi outof that whole situation because
I sell real estate, not, notfurniture.
So another point of contention,because before you know it, the
(26:13):
whole deal went south becauseof a chair that they didn't
agree.
Dr. Shay (26:17):
Right.
Right.
Mike Gomez (26:18):
So I try to keep the main thing, the main thing, be
like, we're talking real estatehere.
We're not talking a bed or apiece of like furniture.
That's just too many.
That's, that's points ofpotential points of like drama.
Dr. Shay (26:30):
And that last point on letting go of control.
Mike Gomez (26:35):
Letting go is that when something's not going to
work out, which I tell sometimespeople, like, it's just not
going to work out.
It's just, well, how can we fixit?
There comes a point, oh,because I pride myself for being
an amazing problem solver.
This is what I do.
I solve puzzles and things inreal estate.
There comes a point where it'slike, there's no more puzzle.
(26:55):
There's no more puzzle tosolve.
This is not going to work outunless you take it.
as it is right there, or wemove along.
There's no, and it's somethingthat I tell agents too.
If I get a stress agent, I'mlike, this deal is either going
to work out or not.
Isn't that beautiful?
Only two outcomes.
You're going to work out ornot.
It's not going to be a middleone.
(27:16):
It's not like it's halfwaygoing to work out.
We can focus on all this noiseor we can focus on making this
deal work.
And as long as we do our job,we're doing our job.
And then we have bosses.
Dr. Shay (27:29):
Okay.
Mike Gomez (27:29):
Cause this is the thing.
This is like, I will say I amself-employed.
Okay.
But when I pick up a listing orI have a buyer, now I have, if
I have 10 buyers, I got 10bosses.
Yeah.
If I have 17 listings, I have17 bosses.
They want report.
They went, why is my house notselling or this or that?
Or what are you doing to sellmy house?
(27:50):
It's like, you know, it's a,but as far as letting go, yeah,
I've had personal deals thathave fallen through that have
caused me a lot of stress and,and, uh, And the way I let go is
make sure that I just don'thave personally something
against that person that did uswrong or that didn't show up to
(28:10):
closing or whatever.
It's just like, hey, they'reprobably dealing with all kinds
of stuff.
That wasn't right.
If the matter is of a matterthat there was money lost,
there's the law for that.
And that's what it is.
You don't have to take itpersonal.
You can just, you know.
Dr. Shay (28:25):
Yeah, yeah, absolutely.
I feel like real estate is oneof those things that everyone
wants to get into, or it's likealmost a backup plan for
everyone to just get into realestate.
It's so easy.
What advice do you have foranyone who is new to this or
wants to get involved in realestate?
Mike Gomez (28:42):
Number one, don't quit your regular day job.
I would say it's a great idea.
Anybody that comes and says, Iwant to get into real estate, my
immediate default answer islike, That's a great idea.
You don't know if this is notgoing to work out for you, but
it could change your life.
You could become amazing.
Like I didn't know I was goingto do like amazing or great.
(29:02):
I just wanted to sell a coupleof houses a year, you know?
So then I would say also find amentor.
Okay.
Find somebody that's going tobe able to get you under their
wings and bring value to thatmentor.
Just don't be like that way.
(29:22):
Like, Oh, teach me all yourways.
Hey, teach me all your ways.
What can I do for you?
You have buyers that you needto follow up that you don't have
time for.
You have anything that you canthink of, like, like I'll, I'll,
I'll go for it, you know?
And so on and so on.
So, um, and then third, onceyou've done one and two and you
(29:43):
start doing your own business,it's like finding niche, like
get really good at somethingthat would separate you from the
pack.
for example what separates mewe go to a party and and there's
five realtors there people aregonna say what do you do i'm a
realtor and then people aregonna ask me what do you do i
said hey i help people buildrental portfolios i'm also a
(30:04):
realtor but and now people aregonna be like oh you know what
i've been thinking about buyinga rental whatever i don't have
to worry about like theirprimary or whatever now i
separated myself from the packand i offer uh different
specialized service likeTurnkey, where we find you the
property, we analyze it for you.
We find your propertymanagement and you start
cashflow and making money.
So I tell everybody, hey, don'tbe a one trick pony, but learn
(30:30):
about all kinds of things, butalso get good at a few things.
Maybe it's new home buyers orland, become the land person.
I saw a sign in Alabama theother day driving and the guy
was just advertising and say,hey, I'll help you find, buy and
sell land.
He was a realtor.
He didn't mention nothing abouthouses or residential.
And I was like, that's sosmart.
(30:51):
You know, because people,realtors can do land, but this
guy is saying, no, that's all Ido.
But that's most of what I do.
So what's going to happen ispeople driving, it's like, I got
a piece of land.
I call that guy.
If he had just said, buy andsell a home fast with me, yada,
yada, yada, call, yada, yada,people might have been nothing.
But now the guy is like cuttinghis piece out by saying, I'll
(31:14):
help you buy yourself land.
So those are the three thingsthat I would say,
Dr. Shay (31:20):
yeah.
Okay.
And finally, if someone isfacing a tent situation in their
own personal lives, whether atwork or at home, what advice
would you give them based onyour real estate experiences?
Mike Gomez (31:37):
Well, I would just say to keep the main goal Like,
hey, what is the end goal herein this type of conflict or
whatever?
I would tell them also to standstrong in their convictions.
You know, don't just foldbecause that's what you need to
do, whatever, you know.
I will say keep yourauthenticity strong.
(32:01):
be very authentic.
Hey, this is, this is how I doit.
And, you know, we can talkabout this and I'm, you know,
but this is, this is it.
This is me, you know, and toalways be also honest and
communicate and over communicateif needed.
It doesn't mean it's going towork, but, but at least you are
doing everything on your side todo it.
(32:21):
Cause you're not going tochange anybody else's, or you're
not going to make anybody elsedo anything.
All you can do is like, Hey,this is my side of the street.
I'm taking care of it.
And, um, And if you're unhappyand nothing changes, it's on you
to move on.
Life's too short to stay doingsomething that you hate.
Dr. Shay (32:43):
Indeed it is.
Well, this has been amazing,Mike.
Can you let everyone know whereto follow you and your work?
Mike Gomez (32:50):
Oh, yes, of course.
First of all, thank you so muchfor having me and talking about
all these things.
They're very fun.
I have a lot of fun.
This is a conversation that wecould have just like one on one
or having a drink and talkingabout life.
But they can find me mostly onInstagram is where I'm most
active at Michael Gomez Broker.
All one word.
(33:10):
But my company is called HiveNashville, H-I-V-E Nashville.
So you can Google me and findme.
Send me a message if you wantto buy investment properties or
residential or land or, youknow, that I can help.
Dr. Shay (33:25):
Mentorship?
Mike Gomez (33:26):
That's right.
That's right.
Mentorship I haven't gotteninto.
Like, I had a wonderful coachlast year.
that helped me so much.
And he keeps telling me, it'slike, hey, you're going to end
up working here, like doingthis.
But I'm like, you know, I'm notsaying no.
I'm just saying just not yet.
(33:46):
It's just not something that...
I
Dr. Shay (33:48):
think you'd be great at it, but...
Mike Gomez (33:50):
Yeah.
So, like, I need a few moreyears of different experiences
before I feel like I can, youknow, improve people's lives
with, like, what I have to sayor what I've gone through and
things like that, you
Dr. Shay (34:01):
So humble.
You're doing it right now,Mike.
Mike Gomez (34:04):
Yeah.
Dr. Shay (34:05):
Literally.
Navigating conflict isn't justfor big moments.
Sometimes it shows up in theday-to-day when timelines don't
line up, when expectations shiftor emotions run high.
The tools Michael shared, clearcommunication, emotional
regulation, staying grounded,aren't just for real estate.
They're for all of us trying tomove through life with more
(34:27):
clarity and care.
As always, thank you forjoining me today in the
Resolution Room.
I'm grateful you're here doingthis work alongside me.
If this episode spoke to you,I'd love for you to please
share.
And until next time, keepbuilding in the quiet because
that's what will carry youforward.
Welcome back to The Resolution Room, where we turn
(00:22):
tension into transformationthrough clarity, connection, and
consistency.
I'm your host, Dr.
Nashay Lowe, and this is aspace where we explore what's
really underneath the momentsthat challenge us and how they
can lead to something morehonest, more human, and more
whole.
So let's get into it.
Buying or selling a home is oneof the most emotional
(00:42):
transactions many people willmake.
But what we don't often see ishow much relational work
realtors do behind the scenes toget the deal done and how that
teaches us something deeperabout tension, trust, and moving
forward.
In a time when everyone wantsto invest, flip, or get into
real estate, we're pulling backthe curtain on what's really
(01:03):
involved when you buy or sellproperty.
This episode isn't about markettrends or mortgage rates.
It's about the people work.
That's the negotiations, theemotional pivots, the high
stakes decisions, and themoments where things nearly fall
apart.
Because real estate isn't justabout buildings.
It's about buildingrelationships.
And what it takes to do thatwell has lessons for all of us,
(01:27):
no matter what we're trying tomove through.
Michael Gomez, can you pleaseintroduce yourself to the
people?
Mike Gomez (01:34):
Michael Gomez, real estate broker here in Nashville,
Tennessee, owner of HiveNashville, father, friend,
husband, imperfect human.
Dr. Shay (01:46):
So let's start here.
What's one thing about being arealtor that most people don't
realize?
Mike Gomez (01:53):
I think a lot of people have this idea of, I'm
not going to slam the carsalesman industry, but they come
in with their guards upthinking that a realtor is a
person that's there to sell themthe most expensive house or to
just make a commission, notreally caring about you know,
(02:15):
the service that they'reproviding and everything that is
implicated with it.
So I think there's a lot ofmisconceptions with what is it
that we do?
Are we needed in this industry?
You know, how professional arewe?
I would say like in everyprofession, there's good and bad
apples.
I definitely will say there'smore good than bad.
But the few will stand outreally big and say, hey, yeah, I
(02:38):
got this realtor and all theycare about was sending me this
houses that I couldn't afford,yada, yada.
I think like less and less wesee We see that in an industry.
But if you would ask me onething that people might not know
about industry is that we notonly provide a service of
helping you find a suitable homeor this rental or an investment
(03:01):
or whatever, but that we'reactually, if the agent's really
good, if the realtor's reallygood, they're helping your
thought process.
They're telling you like, hey,you should not buy this house.
Even if you don't make acommission, it's like, hey,
there's something here.
Look at the future value ofthis.
Or you have a highway here.
When it comes time to sell it,this might be a difficult thing.
(03:23):
How long are you going to behere for?
We have the whole thoughtprocess.
And a lot of times peoplerealize that they start wanting
one thing.
And after a couple of showingsand conversations with their
agents, they change their minds.
Like, oh, you know what?
I thought that's, I thoughtthis is what I wanted, but now
that talking to you and hearingyou out and knowing the
community, how you know it andthe areas, like, I think I want
(03:45):
to be somewhere else or thistype of other home.
So it's not just the service,but we help your thought process
to like determine if you'regoing to make a really good
decision, you know,
Dr. Shay (03:55):
or a regrettable one.
So, okay.
So yeah, you already kind ofgracefully navigated us into
this, this sort of heart of theconversation.
So yeah, Buying or selling ahome isn't just about the
property.
It's often tied to identity,memories, and big life changes.
So how do you help clientsnavigate those emotional layers
(04:16):
while staying focused on theprocess?
Mike Gomez (04:18):
I always ask, and I believe all my agents, like,
hey, why are you selling?
Or why are you moving to thisarea?
A lot of clients that I get arefrom California.
And a lot of times I'll belike, hey, it might be a good
idea if you want to rent for ayear.
And you've never even been toNashville.
What's the rush of buying?
Yeah, you don't want to wastethe money of rent, throw it
(04:41):
away.
But in a sense, it's more like,hey, you don't even know if
you're going to like it here.
I mean, I think you will.
I'm sure you will.
But that's how I see it.
Dr. Shay (04:51):
Yeah, yeah.
Can you recall an emotionalchallenge that you've seen catch
people off guard during a realestate deal?
Mike Gomez (04:58):
Yeah, so houses carry a lot of emotions.
I don't know if you ever heardthe song, The House That Built
Me, that Miranda Lambert madefamous.
It won a Grammy that year, afew years back.
It's an amazing story of a ladythat's walking by.
She stumbles into her oldneighborhood, and she wants to
(05:19):
go visit the house that she grewup, the house that built her.
And she's asking the lady,like, hey, I know you don't know
me from Adam, but thosehandprints in the concrete,
those are mine, and my oldpuppy's buried in the backyard.
So like houses are tied up torelationships and upbringing,
sometimes good, sometimes bad.
(05:40):
So yeah, a lot of times I haveto help the client understand
that, hey, like let's say we'rein a transaction and we're like
$10,000 apart and my client isselling the house and they're
ready to sell it so they canmove on with their lives.
They want to move to NorthCarolina and they're already
making some money.
A lot of times I have to belike, hey, like it's, is $10,000
(06:03):
enough to hold you fromcontinuing your journey?
You know, and then people likesit down and marinate and
sometimes like, yeah, you'reright.
Like I'm ready to move on.
And, you know, I'm just ready.
I'm making some money alreadyhere.
So like, let's go.
You know, but other people getreally tied up.
Also, a lot of sellers believethat their houses are the most
beautiful houses.
Of course.
(06:24):
Oh, my house is this and hasthat.
I'm like, yeah, well, let'slook at the competition.
Yeah.
And then I open up, hey, lookat this.
Look at this hardware floors.
Look at this upgrades.
Not to show them that theirhouse is a lower level, but
let's get real here.
Because I am known for beingsuper, uber real.
I'll be like, hey, this is aterrible time to sell a house
(06:45):
right now.
If you consider renting it andthen moving on and we can give
it a shot next year.
I'll tell people whatever Iwould do.
Dr. Shay (06:54):
Yeah.
Mike Gomez (06:54):
You know, and I've sold over a thousand homes.
I'm not going to say I've seeneverything, but I have a lot of
experience and I'm also aninvestor.
So I own several homes myself.
I've moved like 14 times, youknow, before we built our house
here where we live now.
So it's like...
Which
Dr. Shay (07:08):
is beautiful, by the way.
Mike Gomez (07:09):
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
So, yeah, there's a lot of...
There's so many emotions.
The other day I assisted acouple that were getting a
divorce and it was...
I'm going to say probably themost amicable like divorce I've
ever seen.
They were like joking with eachother, ready to move on and no
drama, no nothing.
And, and they were probablygoing to normally, cause they
(07:32):
were not like emotionallyattached to the home.
They were probably ready tomove on and great.
And, you know, but a lot oftimes there's a lot of like, and
a lot of stuff in there, you
Dr. Shay (07:43):
know?
I can imagine how you deal withmore of the opposite of that.
Mike Gomez (07:45):
It's like the thing between a house and a home.
And when does a house become ahome?
And the moment there has been ahome, then, you know, it
carries a lot of emotions.
You know, those walls carry,you know, they carry stories and
things, you
Dr. Shay (07:59):
know?
Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
And...
Have you ever had to help aclient sort of like let go of
either the home itself or maybean unrealistic expectation or
even just a fear of the change?
And how did you?
Mike Gomez (08:11):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, totally.
I've been in situations whereI've been like, you know, in
disagreement with the seller andpricing.
And I'm always, I always have alittle bit of wiggle room to
say, okay, well, you know what?
You think your house should bethere.
I believe based on data andmarketing conditions and the
professional that I am, that itshould be over here.
However, Let's give it a shotwhere you are.
(08:32):
It's always easier to come downthan to go up.
And if, you know, that isn'tthe case, that is actually
realistic.
I've had clients, they're likea hundred thousand dollars.
off.
And I'm like, listen, I'm aboutto spend a lot of money in
media.
I spend a lot of money in adsand things like that.
I'm not just taking picturesand putting it in MLS.
So like, if I'm going to workwith you, you're going to work
(08:54):
with me.
I need to make sure that I'mgoing to sell your house because
it's going to take time.
And it's time that I could begiving a client that's
realistic, ready to sell.
So it's like, What would youlike to do?
And so I've always tried to bevery, very upfront with people.
And I think in the beginning,when you're a new agent, you
don't have that because you'rehungry and you're starting and
(09:15):
you're just happy that you got alisting.
Where as you progress and youbecome more successful and have
more experience, you startlearning sometimes that not all
listings are meant to be taken.
Not all clients are supposed towork.
I've had clients that have beenrude to me.
because I didn't pick up thephone while I was having dinner
or something like that.
(09:35):
And I'm like, I realized that Imight not be the right fit for
you.
And I don't work with thoseclients just straight up.
It's like, Hey, you don't oweme anything.
And some, some have gotten mada couple.
It hasn't happened much, butlike, Oh, I'm going to report
you to commission.
I'm like, this is the phonenumber.
Please give them a call andtell them whatever you want to
(09:56):
say.
Like, it's just what it is.
I'm not going to be intimidatedif you were rude to me or, or,
um, super unrealistic or Ididn't get back to you within
five minutes of you texting meor something like that.
It's just we just might not bea good fit.
You know, you might needsomebody that's that is like
brand new or something that'sjust ready to drop everything
(10:16):
like I used to do.
Something happened to me likethat earlier on in my real
estate career where I wassupposed to have breakfast with
my wife that day.
And randomly, some guy calledme.
I don't even know how he got mynumber.
It's like, oh, Mr.
Gomez, I'm out here in front ofa house and I want you to show
it to me because I'm going tobuy a house today.
I got up and I just startedgetting ready.
(10:37):
And my wife's like, what'shappening?
I'm like, woman, I'm going tobuy a house today.
You chill.
I'm going to, I'm going to gobring the bacon.
We're supposed to havebreakfast.
I know, but you know what?
I got to work it.
So I left her there and didn'ttake her to breakfast.
And I went, I show, I showthis, this house to this
gentleman.
And then I show him like five,eight, 10 other houses that day.
(10:58):
Do you think he bought a housethat day?
Do you think he bought a houseever with me?
No.
So that day I started learningabout boundaries in our
profession, which, again, thehungrier you are, the less
boundaries you'll have, andyou're going to have to learn
how most of us learn about lifein general, which is through the
(11:20):
heart, you know, heart things.
But from that day on, I startedbeing more picky.
I'm like, hey, you know what?
I cannot show it to you rightnow, but after 2 o'clock I'm
fine.
And you know what happens?
99.9% said, okay.
I'll see you after the time.
So it's like, I want to see itright now.
Right now I can't, but I cansee it.
I can show it to you in acouple hours or let me see if I
(11:41):
can find an agent.
Nothing happens.
They don't fire you.
They still buy the house.
Gosh,
Dr. Shay (11:47):
that's so funny.
And, you know, it's funny eventhinking about how this
conversation came to be.
So, you know, I think when mostpeople think of real estate,
they don't just think conflict,right?
But when I heard of what youdo, I thought, Thought of price
disputes, repair negotiations,delayed financing.
The conflict is baked into realestate, I imagine.
(12:08):
And so how do you prepareclients for the reality that
some tension is inevitable inthis process?
Because I imagine for somepeople, it's almost like a
honeymoon phase.
I'm going to go buy my dreamhouse.
I saved all my life or whateverit is.
How do you ground them?
Mike Gomez (12:22):
I mean, honestly, just being extremely honest,
I've had a client recently thatwas making low offers and he
made a low offer to a place andhe was like, he got really mad
that he didn't get the house,like $100,000.
And I was like, you know...
Yeah, the market right now, youhave the advantage, but not
every seller is in a positionthat they're willing to part
(12:45):
ways with a property.
A lot of them are just willingto ride it another year and
whatnot.
And this guy got really, reallylike worked up about it.
And I just kept it.
I just I'm not going to matchtheir energy.
If they come stressed, I am thecalm.
You know, if they come worried,I am the calm.
I'm always the calm.
I'm always the voice of reasonwhen there's a lot of stuff
going on, a lot of peoplegetting mad.
(13:06):
Why are they asking for allthis stuff?
When we tell them that way, I'mlike, they're just negotiating.
That means their agent's good.
That means their agent'ssaying, hey, I know that this
was supposed to be as is, but goahead and hit him for $2,500.
Hey, it's real estate.
Anything goes.
Then you can decide whether youwant to take it or not.
You can't just take it likepersonal.
(13:26):
You know where we get a lot ofdrama from, believe it or not?
Other agents.
Dr. Shay (13:31):
Oh, really?
Oh,
Mike Gomez (13:33):
my gosh.
Some agents take it sopersonal.
And I'm always reminding them.
I'm like, hey, listen, we don'thave to go about it this way.
I'm serving my client, but I'malso serving you and serving
your client.
So if you come at me likeyelling at me or upset because
the inspection brought a lot ofthings or whatever, first of
(13:55):
all, this is not your house, youknow?
It's not your house.
We just got to keep it whereit's like you're an amazing.
And if they're an amazingagent, I say, you're an amazing
agent.
You're working so hard for yourclient.
But there's a line that youdon't have to cross.
The line is like yelling at mefor something that I am
conveying information that myclient wants me to convey.
(14:15):
I know that you're emotionaland you're the best and all that
stuff, but we don't have to doit that way.
So we get a lot of feedback.
maybe I have 38 agents under meand every now and then an agent
calls me and says, hey, I'mdealing with this situation and
this agent made fun of my accentor all kinds of weird things
like I hear like out there.
And the weird thing is this,when the real estate market is
(14:40):
more balanced and all the agentsare making bank, like you don't
see a lot of that.
But when times are kind ofhard, like right now, I would
consider this hard times.
I will tell this to an agent ofmine, it's like, hey,
understand that There's a lot ofpeople stressed.
There's a lot of people aremaking a third of their income
from last year and the yearbefore.
And they might not planthemselves well to ride that
wave.
And then they're like edgy, youknow, and they're paying it
(15:02):
with you just like that.
They're paying it with you.
And I said, now don't matchtheir energy.
Keep yourself professional.
And if they cross the line,tell them they crossed the line
and that that is not acceptable.
And, uh, you know, And mostlikely they'll come and
apologize or they'll continue tobe what they are.
It's what it is.
You stay focused on yourtransaction.
And when you're done, go take ashot or go to the gym and cold
(15:24):
plunge, whatever it is you do tolike chillax.
Dr. Shay (15:26):
Right.
Gosh.
And when you're caught betweentwo parties who have opposing
needs, like let's say there'slike a seller unwilling to budge
and a buyer who feels maxedout, what's your approach to
finding common ground there?
Mike Gomez (15:41):
Oh, common ground is going to be, it's not going to
work.
It comes to a point inmediation or whatever, if we are
to help the seller understandthat this is a good offer right
now, that you should probablytake this, where they might be
thinking, yeah, you just want toget paid.
You want to get yourcommission.
Okay, I understand that.
And the buyer has said, hey,this is as far as I can go.
(16:03):
I mean, it just comes to like,hey, what do you want to do?
Dr. Shay (16:08):
The best solution that
Mike Gomez (16:09):
you can- Let's go pros and cons.
You take it, you think you'releaving money on the table or
you leave it and then we sit inthe market a couple months, a
couple more.
Where are you in your life?
What's your end goal?
That's really where I try tofocus.
What is your end goal here?
You're still in the house, butyou're trying to move on.
You're trying to close achapter.
(16:30):
You're trying to start writinga new one.
So is this worth you closingyour chapter?
or not, or keeping it open.
Really, I use that all thetime.
It's like, hey, becauseeverybody's closing a chapter
when they're closing a house,unless it's an investment
property.
It's less emotional or zeroemotion.
It's just numbers.
Like, I'm not going to takethat.
Yeah, I like that.
Let's go.
Homeowners?
Dr. Shay (16:54):
Sorry, go ahead.
Mike Gomez (16:55):
I was going to say, when it's homeowners, you're
going to be ready for emotions,and it's normal.
100%.
And I'll tell this to clients,too.
Like, hey, it's normal.
Even if this goes as planned,everything goes smooth, still
one of the most stressful thingsthat you can do in your life is
to buy a house.
It's a big purchase.
You're nervous.
You're, what if something goeswrong and can I afford this
payment?
There's so many questions likelingering when you're buying a
(17:17):
house.
So it's like, you know.
Dr. Shay (17:20):
Yeah.
At this point in, in being inNashville, are most of your
sales like for investment or arepeople, is it more like
traditional house buying andselling?
Mike Gomez (17:30):
So I mostly serve like developers that build like
entire neighborhoods.
Um, So I would say I'm stillmore with investors, but I'm
still seeing buyers every day.
Like this week, we've had threebuyers, one under contract, one
probably under contract today,and one that's probably going to
make an offer tomorrow.
So those three have beenregular homeowners.
Dr. Shay (17:50):
But
Mike Gomez (17:51):
I have a developer that has like 63 units that I
have to pre-sell soon and thingslike that.
So it's a good combination.
It keeps me very in the, Istill love, even though, again,
I'm a managing broker, I stilllove to buy and sell properties
for the people and hang out withbuyers and hang out with
sellers.
I still love it.
So I'm not just like, oh, I'mnot going to do this or
(18:11):
whatever.
No, I have an agent that helpsme with showings and things like
that.
But I'm still touching everyaspect, helping negotiating and
all that.
Dr. Shay (18:21):
Nice.
I'm curious and thinking aboutlike the lessons you've gained
from your career over time.
How long have you been doingthis again?
14
Mike Gomez (18:29):
years.
And
Dr. Shay (18:30):
actually, let's back up a minute.
How did you even get into this?
Mike Gomez (18:34):
Well, I was a guitar player in a Christian band
making a thousand bucks a month.
So when my wife and I decidedthat we wanted to expand and
have a family, have kids, I waslike, man, I really want to be
able to do something that I canContinue to play music and do my
ministry and make more moneybecause this is not going to be
(18:54):
enough to provide for a family.
So I went to Keller Williamsoffice in Spring Hill and I
asked the lady that was the teamleader.
I'm like, I got two questions.
You know, one, can you do thispart time and make money?
And she said, there are someagents that do this part time.
that make more money than theones that do it full time.
She's like, I don't know how itis.
Personality thing.
(19:15):
I'm like, okay, number two, doI have to come in and work at an
office every day?
She's like, again, there's somepeople that only come here to
get their checks that make moremoney than the people that are
here all day long.
I said, okay, where do I signup?
And then I did not have $1,500to my name.
And a friend of mine who's adoctor in New York lent me
$1,500 for me to get all myonline classes and everything.
(19:36):
And Of course I paid him back.
And then that's how I became anagent.
Then I started, I started ateam not knowing what starting a
team was.
I was just like playing musicin Nebraska and I would get an
online lead for a property and Iwould send it to a friend of
mine and say, Hey, that's anagent.
I'm like, Hey, you want to make50% of this?
The guy's ready or the lady'sready.
You got to go get in my house.
So they said, absolutely.
(19:57):
So, you know, I would work afew minutes and I would get paid
half of that transaction at theend of the day.
So I was like, this is great.
All I need to do is be on thephone and then pass them on to
somebody that I know they'regoing to take really good care
of.
So I slowly, I basicallystarted a team and that's how I
started getting.
I started working withinvestors.
Then I started buyinginvestment properties and then
(20:18):
became known for being more ofan investor-driven broker.
People wanted to build rentalportfolios and things like that
would come to me and say, hey, Iwant to buy my first rental or
my 10th rental.
Find me a good deal.
And that's what I would do.
Dr. Shay (20:32):
And where do I sign up?
Mike Gomez (20:34):
Exactly.
You got my number.
Let's go.
So
Dr. Shay (20:39):
what's one communication skill that you've
taken away in real estate thatyou now use in your personal
life?
Mike Gomez (20:47):
You have to be very upfront.
You have to be like realistic.
You also want to bend.
When you need to bend, if Itell somebody, hey, I can sell
your house for $600 and theywant me to list at $650, I'm not
going to back away and be like,oh, no, then find somebody.
No, I'm going to be like, allright, well, let's talk about
(21:09):
this.
How about I do go $650 and whatI like to do is I like to do 10
days for $650.
eight showings.
So if the first 10 days, wedon't have 10 showings or, or,
you know, just, there's just noactivity.
I was like, that's, we need tostart coming down in price.
(21:29):
It's just, it's not me.
It's not the house.
It's just, we missed the targetmarket because we went to, I
always say, Hey, I listed overthere, but, but in the case that
doesn't sell for that price,it's We don't want to have a
super long conversation onpricing because we already had
it and we're high.
Oh, somebody's going to comewith cash.
And yeah, they could.
It's true.
And sometimes they do.
(21:50):
And sometimes I'm wrong.
Sometimes I'm like, there's noway that's going to sell for
that.
And it does sell.
Most of the times, though, I'mright.
It sells for more or less.
Yeah.
Because this is the thing,again, is you look at the
current market conditions, youlook at what people are selling
in that particular neighborhood,and you're going to get really
close and you're going to seethe upgrades that that house has
(22:12):
versus something else.
You can price it maybe a littlebit less than the last house
that sold it was ready if youwant a quick sale.
So there are things that canindicate you like that, except
right at this second, and thisis the season that we're in
right now, at least in theentire country, that you can
list a house and you don't knowwhen it's going to sell.
People say, well, how quick doyou sell it?
(22:34):
I'm like, I know we're going todo everything that we can to
sell it, and it'll move or themarket will say we're not ready
for it yet or i um our reportcame from bank of america and
saying that 75 of home buyersare in the sidelines right now
75 so imagine imagine pricescome down a little bit imagine
(22:59):
rates come down boom buyers backin the market For you to even
find a house is going to bedifficult.
I mean, we don't build themthat fast.
So the healthiest market is abalanced market where things are
very even.
Right now, it's very uneven.
Nobody's buying.
Everybody's selling.
Dr. Shay (23:18):
Right.
So I picked up that you havegreat negotiation and
compromising skills.
Mike Gomez (23:25):
Yes.
That's
Dr. Shay (23:25):
what I picked up.
And so you've worked in highstakes, emotionally charged
environments, as we discussed.
So what has real estate taughtyou about patience, trust, and
letting go of control?
Mike Gomez (23:37):
Well, on patience, people that know me will tell
you that I'm extremely patient.
person.
Sometimes they don't evenunderstand it.
It's just like, I think I gotthat from my mom, but I think
that was the skill that I hadbefore real estate.
As far as trust, this businesshas shown me over and over that
(24:01):
you have to be very careful onwho you trust.
It's very, very careful.
If you're a home buyer, homeseller, investor, whatever,
there's still people there thatare not good people.
You know, they're going to makeyou do things or they're going
to give you bad checks andthey're going to like screw you.
So you really have to alwayskind of be with your guard up,
you know.
As far as like between buyersand sellers in the contracts, if
(24:24):
a seller agrees something, likethere's something that I do,
for example, let's say you'rethe buyer and I'm representing
you and there's a seller andwe're buying their house and
there's a list of repairs.
I always going to ask, I'malways going to get a quote for
that list to have a moneyfigure.
And I'm always going to try toget you that money.
And the reason I do that isbecause most of the conflicts,
(24:48):
once you're under contract, haveto do with inspection and
repairs.
The seller says, look at this.
This fan is fixed.
And you're like, that's notfixed.
It's got duct tape on it.
Well, it's fixed.
And just for something as smallas that can put a damper in an
entire negotiation that had beenso good.
up to the point on adisagreement on something was
(25:10):
fixed or not.
Or the grout color that youused to fix the things that we
never specified you didn't like.
Or something like that.
So I always try to see thepoints where I see that there
could be conflicts,conflict-prone zones, and I try
to mitigate those in thebeginning of the transaction.
(25:31):
Like, hey, we're just going tohave them give you money and
then you'll use your contractorNow you're dealing with that
contractor, not with the seller.
We don't have to deal with thatstuff.
Yeah.
A lot of times too, let me tellyou something else.
A lot of people want to selltheir house and say, hey, the
furniture is for sale also.
Immediately they go, this isgoing to be separate.
(25:52):
Meaning we're going to sell thehouse.
And once it's under contract,you're going to put sticky notes
on all the furniture withpricing.
And then those people are goingto come into the inspection and
then they're going to negotiatedirectly with you.
but you're going to let moi outof that whole situation because
I sell real estate, not, notfurniture.
So another point of contention,because before you know it, the
(26:13):
whole deal went south becauseof a chair that they didn't
agree.
Dr. Shay (26:17):
Right.
Right.
Mike Gomez (26:18):
So I try to keep the main thing, the main thing, be
like, we're talking real estatehere.
We're not talking a bed or apiece of like furniture.
That's just too many.
That's, that's points ofpotential points of like drama.
Dr. Shay (26:30):
And that last point on letting go of control.
Mike Gomez (26:35):
Letting go is that when something's not going to
work out, which I tell sometimespeople, like, it's just not
going to work out.
It's just, well, how can we fixit?
There comes a point, oh,because I pride myself for being
an amazing problem solver.
This is what I do.
I solve puzzles and things inreal estate.
There comes a point where it'slike, there's no more puzzle.
(26:55):
There's no more puzzle tosolve.
This is not going to work outunless you take it.
as it is right there, or wemove along.
There's no, and it's somethingthat I tell agents too.
If I get a stress agent, I'mlike, this deal is either going
to work out or not.
Isn't that beautiful?
Only two outcomes.
You're going to work out ornot.
It's not going to be a middleone.
(27:16):
It's not like it's halfwaygoing to work out.
We can focus on all this noiseor we can focus on making this
deal work.
And as long as we do our job,we're doing our job.
And then we have bosses.
Dr. Shay (27:29):
Okay.
Mike Gomez (27:29):
Cause this is the thing.
This is like, I will say I amself-employed.
Okay.
But when I pick up a listing orI have a buyer, now I have, if
I have 10 buyers, I got 10bosses.
Yeah.
If I have 17 listings, I have17 bosses.
They want report.
They went, why is my house notselling or this or that?
Or what are you doing to sellmy house?
(27:50):
It's like, you know, it's a,but as far as letting go, yeah,
I've had personal deals thathave fallen through that have
caused me a lot of stress and,and, uh, And the way I let go is
make sure that I just don'thave personally something
against that person that did uswrong or that didn't show up to
(28:10):
closing or whatever.
It's just like, hey, they'reprobably dealing with all kinds
of stuff.
That wasn't right.
If the matter is of a matterthat there was money lost,
there's the law for that.
And that's what it is.
You don't have to take itpersonal.
You can just, you know.
Dr. Shay (28:25):
Yeah, yeah, absolutely.
I feel like real estate is oneof those things that everyone
wants to get into, or it's likealmost a backup plan for
everyone to just get into realestate.
It's so easy.
What advice do you have foranyone who is new to this or
wants to get involved in realestate?
Mike Gomez (28:42):
Number one, don't quit your regular day job.
I would say it's a great idea.
Anybody that comes and says, Iwant to get into real estate, my
immediate default answer islike, That's a great idea.
You don't know if this is notgoing to work out for you, but
it could change your life.
You could become amazing.
Like I didn't know I was goingto do like amazing or great.
(29:02):
I just wanted to sell a coupleof houses a year, you know?
So then I would say also find amentor.
Okay.
Find somebody that's going tobe able to get you under their
wings and bring value to thatmentor.
Just don't be like that way.
(29:22):
Like, Oh, teach me all yourways.
Hey, teach me all your ways.
What can I do for you?
You have buyers that you needto follow up that you don't have
time for.
You have anything that you canthink of, like, like I'll, I'll,
I'll go for it, you know?
And so on and so on.
So, um, and then third, onceyou've done one and two and you
(29:43):
start doing your own business,it's like finding niche, like
get really good at somethingthat would separate you from the
pack.
for example what separates mewe go to a party and and there's
five realtors there people aregonna say what do you do i'm a
realtor and then people aregonna ask me what do you do i
said hey i help people buildrental portfolios i'm also a
(30:04):
realtor but and now people aregonna be like oh you know what
i've been thinking about buyinga rental whatever i don't have
to worry about like theirprimary or whatever now i
separated myself from the packand i offer uh different
specialized service likeTurnkey, where we find you the
property, we analyze it for you.
We find your propertymanagement and you start
cashflow and making money.
So I tell everybody, hey, don'tbe a one trick pony, but learn
(30:30):
about all kinds of things, butalso get good at a few things.
Maybe it's new home buyers orland, become the land person.
I saw a sign in Alabama theother day driving and the guy
was just advertising and say,hey, I'll help you find, buy and
sell land.
He was a realtor.
He didn't mention nothing abouthouses or residential.
And I was like, that's sosmart.
(30:51):
You know, because people,realtors can do land, but this
guy is saying, no, that's all Ido.
But that's most of what I do.
So what's going to happen ispeople driving, it's like, I got
a piece of land.
I call that guy.
If he had just said, buy andsell a home fast with me, yada,
yada, yada, call, yada, yada,people might have been nothing.
But now the guy is like cuttinghis piece out by saying, I'll
(31:14):
help you buy yourself land.
So those are the three thingsthat I would say,
Dr. Shay (31:20):
yeah.
Okay.
And finally, if someone isfacing a tent situation in their
own personal lives, whether atwork or at home, what advice
would you give them based onyour real estate experiences?
Mike Gomez (31:37):
Well, I would just say to keep the main goal Like,
hey, what is the end goal herein this type of conflict or
whatever?
I would tell them also to standstrong in their convictions.
You know, don't just foldbecause that's what you need to
do, whatever, you know.
I will say keep yourauthenticity strong.
(32:01):
be very authentic.
Hey, this is, this is how I doit.
And, you know, we can talkabout this and I'm, you know,
but this is, this is it.
This is me, you know, and toalways be also honest and
communicate and over communicateif needed.
It doesn't mean it's going towork, but, but at least you are
doing everything on your side todo it.
(32:21):
Cause you're not going tochange anybody else's, or you're
not going to make anybody elsedo anything.
All you can do is like, Hey,this is my side of the street.
I'm taking care of it.
And, um, And if you're unhappyand nothing changes, it's on you
to move on.
Life's too short to stay doingsomething that you hate.
Dr. Shay (32:43):
Indeed it is.
Well, this has been amazing,Mike.
Can you let everyone know whereto follow you and your work?
Mike Gomez (32:50):
Oh, yes, of course.
First of all, thank you so muchfor having me and talking about
all these things.
They're very fun.
I have a lot of fun.
This is a conversation that wecould have just like one on one
or having a drink and talkingabout life.
But they can find me mostly onInstagram is where I'm most
active at Michael Gomez Broker.
All one word.
(33:10):
But my company is called HiveNashville, H-I-V-E Nashville.
So you can Google me and findme.
Send me a message if you wantto buy investment properties or
residential or land or, youknow, that I can help.
Dr. Shay (33:25):
Mentorship?
Mike Gomez (33:26):
That's right.
That's right.
Mentorship I haven't gotteninto.
Like, I had a wonderful coachlast year.
that helped me so much.
And he keeps telling me, it'slike, hey, you're going to end
up working here, like doingthis.
But I'm like, you know, I'm notsaying no.
I'm just saying just not yet.
(33:46):
It's just not something that...
I
Dr. Shay (33:48):
think you'd be great at it, but...
Mike Gomez (33:50):
Yeah.
So, like, I need a few moreyears of different experiences
before I feel like I can, youknow, improve people's lives
with, like, what I have to sayor what I've gone through and
things like that, you
Dr. Shay (34:01):
So humble.
You're doing it right now,Mike.
Mike Gomez (34:04):
Yeah.
Dr. Shay (34:05):
Literally.
Navigating conflict isn't justfor big moments.
Sometimes it shows up in theday-to-day when timelines don't
line up, when expectations shiftor emotions run high.
The tools Michael shared, clearcommunication, emotional
regulation, staying grounded,aren't just for real estate.
They're for all of us trying tomove through life with more
(34:27):
clarity and care.
As always, thank you forjoining me today in the
Resolution Room.
I'm grateful you're here doingthis work alongside me.
If this episode spoke to you,I'd love for you to please
share.
And until next time, keepbuilding in the quiet because
that's what will carry youforward.
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