April 21, 2025 • 39 mins
🎧 Podcast & YouTube Description:
They never warned us about hangovers lasting 3 days, midlife crises creeping in before 40, or the guilt you feel just for going to the pub…
In this episode of the UNTOLD Podcast, Ash and Chris are flying duo while Des handles business in Manchester (or pretends to). What starts as banter about first drinks, hangovers and dodgy teenage choices turns into a real, honest chat about the pressure of modern life.
We open up about:
- The sh*t they don’t prepare you for as a man
- Why we feel guilty taking time for ourselves
- Balancing work, family, and the pressure to have it all
- Midlife wobble or full-blown crisis?
- What we’d tell our 25-year-old selves
- And why buying a Lambo might not solve your problems
Expect laughs, honesty, and a little therapy along the way.
 If you're a bloke trying to keep it together—or someone trying to understand one—this episode is for you.
đź”” Subscribe for more unfiltered chats every Tuesday
đź“© Want to be a guest? Got a story? Email or DM us
🎯 Follow us on Instagram & TikTok: @UNTOLDPodcast.official
🎟️ Tickets for the Des Hamilton Roadshow — 30th May in Manchester — now live!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hello and welcome to the Untold Podcast.
Today I'm here with Chris.
Hello everybody, it's just ustwo, isn't it?
Because Des couldn't make it.
What's Des up to?
Speaker 2 (00:11):
Well, he's got an excuse, but I feel like he just
can't be arsed.
Yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 1 (00:16):
Well, I reckon that he's sold a shed load of tickets
to an event in Manchester hashe got an event on.
Yeah, he's got an event on, hashe?
Speaker 2 (00:23):
The In Manchester.
Has he got an event on?
Yeah, he's got an event on.
Has he 30th of May, the Des?
Speaker 1 (00:25):
Hamilton Roadshow, but I reckon he's sold a
shitload of tickets and he don'thave a venue yet.
So I think he's driven up toManchester to try and knock on
people's doors and say can youhost my Hamilton Roadshow To be?
Speaker 2 (00:36):
fair.
I did hear him eating during avoice note in the car, so you
could be right then, mate, buthe's always eating in a voice
note.
Well, this is it.
He's always in his car.
To be fair, he's always eatingin a voice note.
Bless him.
Speaker 1 (00:52):
So I reckon we've been to the pub, we've had a
pint, which has loosened us up.
Speaker 2 (00:56):
Lucy Lucy.
Speaker 1 (00:58):
I thought we'd just chat shit about things in life,
go for it.
So the shit.
They never told us when we weregrowing up.
So how bad mornings hit afteryou hit to 35 fucking hell
hangovers lasting I mean, Idon't know about you, but this
(01:18):
is three days, but mine areprobably closer to two weeks you
ever had it.
Speaker 2 (01:22):
it depends how hard you hit it, mate, didn't it to
be 30?
At the end of the day, I've hadhangovers for two weeks easy.
Speaker 1 (01:27):
You go out and have a drink I'm never drinking again.
I'm never drinking again andyou wake up the next morning and
you're like I'm still notdrinking again.
Speaker 2 (01:35):
It's usually the afternoon and someone goes do
you want a beer?
No, it doesn't, of course youdon't.
Speaker 1 (01:42):
I remember we used to go to.
We used to go to A friend'shouse and as lads, like 18 year
olds, he used to love us, havingus around.
Sadly he passed away, but weused to go there and we used to
get Absolutely spangled On aSaturday night and then on a
Sunday We'd play cards and he'dlove To see us all suffering
(02:03):
Tequila shots on a sundayafternoon while he's there on a
barbecue cooking shrimps andstuff.
But that hangover.
I wish I could go back to thedays when a hangover literally
lasted a couple of hours in themorning.
Speaker 2 (02:14):
Yeah, I felt I only had a hangover, proper hangover,
in my 20s, probably twice, andthat was because I drunk like a
whole bottle of jack daniel'sover blind about three hours, or
it was a litre bottle of vodkain about 20 minutes for a bit.
But yeah, mate, honestly, howold are you?
I don't know, 37, I think.
Yeah, I'm 42, mate.
If you're getting hangoverslike that now, you're fucked.
Oh, for fuck's sake, Iliterally have to.
(02:35):
I've had.
I've had.
I've had a pint at the pub andwe got a beer here.
Speaker 1 (02:40):
I'll probably a hangover in 20 minutes after the
episode oh god but who cares?
I'm going to have another swigof my drink what's, and I was
going to save this for anotherepisode.
But what's your first memory ofdrinking?
Speaker 2 (02:57):
Dave Garrett's house, probably 1996, something like
that.
That was that bottle of JackDaniels, but I was about 13,.
I think Mum and dad had justsplit up.
Thankfully, david Garrett's mumwas an absolute legend.
I got so paralytic on NewYear's Eve that I spent three
days in his bed throwing up allover his bedroom, and his mum
told my mum that I was justhaving lots of fun, jesus.
Speaker 1 (03:20):
I remember you know your parents.
They used to do the thing andthey used to be like oh, you're
going to that party, we'll goand get you a couple of drinks.
Parents, come up before WKDBlues.
Wkd Blues.
Yes mate, I don't know.
I reckon I was 14, and I waslike that's it.
Speaker 2 (03:38):
It's around 14, isn't ?
Speaker 1 (03:39):
it.
Speaker 2 (03:40):
Yeah, it's got like 14, 15 years of age.
It's got like 14, 15 years ofage, that's when you go for it.
Speaker 1 (03:43):
And I was like no, that's not enough.
So I had this drink.
It's like a bureau thing in thecorner of the room Like all
that maple and stuff.
I opened it up.
There's a litre and a half ofPimms in there.
I was like I'll fucking takethat.
So I took that and my WKD Blues.
Now, to this day, familieswhose house it was still calls
(04:05):
me Pim's boy.
Nice, I went there.
Speaker 2 (04:08):
I've heard the worst things to be called to be fair
happy thing.
Speaker 1 (04:11):
It's amazing how that sticks, though, but I was why
pick?
Speaker 2 (04:14):
you could have picked something decent, I don't
fucking know.
Speaker 1 (04:17):
It's like 10% or something you could have gone
for the full age.
You could go for it.
After you drink a litre of itmate.
Speaker 2 (04:22):
Jesus Christ, no wonder you're real, especially
with lemonade.
Speaker 1 (04:26):
The thing is as well is I fancied the pants off of
this girl whose house it was.
Not the mum.
I'm in with the cool kids.
I'm in with the cool no, notthe mum.
I'm in with the cool kids.
I've been invited to the coolkids party like fucking and I
(04:50):
absolutely fucking ruined it andI was still called pims boy by
the girl and her family untilthis fucking day those years
later pims boy, I'm gonna startcalling you that for now.
I'm gonna change I'm actuallygonna do it.
While I was sitting, I'm gonnachange your name on my phone to
p Boy and then, when I go, totext you in a couple of weeks'
time.
Speaker 2 (05:05):
I will have no idea where your phone number's gone,
because I won't remember that.
Speaker 1 (05:09):
Oh dear, look a bit deeper, shit they never told you
.
Balancing, balancing, fuckinglife and family.
Obviously you've got a kid.
You've got a wife Balancingfucking life and family.
Obviously you've got a kid.
You've got a wife Balancinglife and family.
That's like it's hard, isn't it?
It's hard Like we've just beento the pub for a pint.
(05:30):
Do you feel guilty?
Speaker 2 (05:32):
No, do you feel guilty doing that?
No, not at all, because I workmy fucking nuts off.
Speaker 1 (05:35):
And I think that's a big thing as well.
I do it I like, so that's likeI'll say to the missus.
I'm going out on the motorbiketomorrow morning, or I've just
started playing golf.
I'm absolutely terrible at it,but when it's going good I quite
enjoy it.
And my reasoning with myself isit's eight o'clock on a Sunday
morning, we play.
(05:55):
I get five, six, 7,000 steps in.
I'm out in the sun, I'm gettingfresh air.
That's my reasoning with myselfto be able to do it.
Speaker 2 (06:07):
Yeah, I mean, before we go any further, I'd just like
to say, obviously I've knownyou for about three months now.
You know I play golf, so wherethe fuck's my invite at 8
o'clock on a Sunday morning?
Speaker 1 (06:14):
alright, well, you did play golf.
You said you retired.
Speaker 2 (06:17):
Well, no, I gave it up because I'm working hard, but
you know 8 o'clock on a Sundaymorning actually, to be fair, I
am live on TikTok at 8 o'clockin the morning on a Sunday.
Speaker 1 (06:24):
Yeah, I'll be live.
I'll be live.
Yeah, I'll be live on a Sundaymorning.
Speaker 2 (06:27):
Yeah fair point.
I'll take that one back.
There you go.
Erm, yeah, no, I don't feelguilty because, at the end of
the day, like my missus works aswell, my missus does work hard.
We're all about mental healthhere, right?
So let's just, let's just let'sjust unpack that a little bit
(06:48):
for me.
I overthink everything and I'mstruggling all the time to just
comprehend what is going on inmy life and how I'm dealing with
this and dealing with that.
So, if I have a beer, that halfhour that we spent at the pub
is my wind down time.
I don't get a wind down timeotherwise, because I go home
from work, as I said in theprevious podcast, my little
boy's all over me, which Iabsolutely love, wouldn't change
(07:09):
for the world, but you don'tget that on one time.
And, yeah, my missus probablydoesn't get it as well, but she
does do things without realisingshe's doing things that she
should be unwinding with, youknow.
So I think it's important toknow that you can have a little
bit of time to yourself.
You shouldn't feel guilty fordoing things like having a beer
with your mate or, you know,going for a walk and not taking
(07:29):
your family, or just doingsomething for yourself.
Everybody should do somethingfor themselves.
Speaker 1 (07:33):
Everyone should, because if you're not happy in
your own self.
Speaker 2 (07:36):
No one else is going to be happy around you.
Speaker 1 (07:37):
You're shit to everyone else, aren't you, if
you're not happy?
But you've got to have thattime, you've got to have it.
When I'm out on the motorbikeon a Sunday morning going to the
CAF on the beach with a coupleof mates, I'm normally back by
10, 11, sometimes four in theafternoon, depends how the ride
(07:58):
goes.
But I'm so lucky that I've gota wife that understands that I
feel like you're going for me?
Speaker 2 (08:05):
No, I'm not going for you.
You're talking about golf andthen talking about motorbikes.
Speaker 1 (08:07):
Motorbikes.
Speaker 2 (08:07):
Well, you haven't got a motorbike.
I've given up on the golf and Isold my motorbike 15 years ago
and I'm not allowed to getanother motorbike because my
missus won't let me.
Yeah, but it's actually gettingon, the bike that she's not too
(08:28):
keen on.
Speaker 1 (08:29):
And I love it when my wife goes out.
I do.
I love it when she goes out andlets her hair down.
She doesn't do it enough and Ithink she feels more guilty than
I do.
She has this guilt of oh yeah,but I can't go out and enjoy
your time with your friendsbecause not being horrible, but
you're so much nicer and betterto be around after you've let
(08:49):
your hair down yeah, my missusis the same, you know she says,
oh, you're my world and I don'twant to be away from you and
stuff like that.
Speaker 2 (08:55):
But you need that little break, you know, because
it makes you feel fonder if yougo home and you're like, oh, how
was your evening or what didyou do?
And you know it makes moreconversation, you feel better in
yourself and it is important todo like, like you, I love it
when my missus goes out of hermates.
Speaker 1 (09:11):
She just chooses not to go out that much yeah, mine
does as well, and I don't knowwhat it is.
She's got a lovely group ofmates and like go out, go go.
Obviously not every other day,but yeah go out and enjoy it.
I think you've got to do it,sort of like I say to my mates
like we should do stuff.
You probably do it.
You go out with your mates andyou'll go on a stag, do yeah,
(09:34):
and you all get together onceevery year, once every six
months maybe, if you're lucky,and every time you end the
weekend, you end the day, andyou're like we should do this
more often you never fucking doit.
Speaker 2 (09:43):
Yeah, yeah, we have.
Yeah, it was funny enough.
Speaker 1 (09:45):
The text messages went out a couple of weeks ago.
Speaker 2 (09:47):
Yeah, why is that?
I don't know.
I think it's just life and itjust gets so caught up in thing
is everybody gets in the ratrace, don't they get up?
Get up in the morning, you haveto go to work, you have to earn
a living, you have to pay yourbills.
You get home from work, you'reknackered.
In the uk we work, we live towork.
Yeah, similar to that.
You live because you have topay your bills.
Speaker 1 (10:06):
How do you change the narrative, though?
Do you know what I mean?
Should we be prioritisingourselves more?
Speaker 2 (10:13):
Selfishly should we be prioritising ourselves more.
It's difficult to talk aboutthis situation because
everybody's different, but welive in a very materialistic
life, don't we?
In a world where everybody ismaterialistic, you want
everything that's nice.
You want the nice house, youwant a nice garden, you want the
nice cars.
Depends on what actually youwant out of life.
If you want to be happy, don'tstrive for all that, yeah,
(10:34):
because that won't make youhappy.
It just causes you more stress.
Speaker 1 (10:37):
Time isn't it.
It's finding time we.
We manage to find times for, wemanage to find time for the
things that don't fill us withjoy.
We managed to find time forwork, to do that quote, to go
out and please that customer,but we never we put ourselves
back.
We put ourselves on a backburner, where I feel that we all
(11:00):
should put ourselves at thefront, cause if you're not happy
, then you're done.
Speaker 2 (11:04):
So the one thing I always used to say to people
because if you're not happy,then you're done.
So one thing I always used tosay to people is if you don't
love yourself you, then how'sanyone ever gonna love you?
Yeah, and I think that's reallyimportant to mention, because
if you just live your life foreverybody else all of the time,
it makes you unhappy.
And if you're unhappy, you'reactually doing the complete
opposite to what you're tryingto achieve by making everyone
else up around you your family,your kids, your wife, your, you
(11:24):
know your friends and everything.
What you're trying to achieveby making everyone else up
around you your family, yourkids, your wife, your friends
and everything.
If you're a miserable bastardto be around, they're not going
to want to be around you anyway.
Speaker 1 (11:30):
That's it, and it's so difficult.
I reckon that anybody listeninglook back at it.
Can you make more time foryourself without fucking up
everything?
I bet you can.
I bet, if you look back at it,you can, I bet you can, I bet,
if you look back at it, you can,I bet you can make it.
Well, ask me in three monthstime and I'll tell you Well,
that's it.
Speaker 2 (11:47):
Because I've just done it you know that's it.
Speaker 1 (11:48):
That's it.
You've made fucking 24 sevenfor yourself mate yeah mate.
Speaker 2 (11:52):
Yeah, You've made 24 seven for yourself but, hats off
to and hopefully everyone'sreally worried that I wasn't
going to come back because ofthe conversation we had in the
car.
But I've actually made thedecision.
I've done it now.
I've told the client, I've toldthe guys that work for me that
(12:16):
they're not working for meanymore.
I'm going to fold the businessin two and a half weeks' time
about two two and a half weeks'time when I finish the job in
London, I'm going balls deep inTikTok and putting as much
effort into the podcast as Ipossibly can now, and the more I
think about it, the more I'vechanged already, mate.
Yeah, I feel like I've got adifferent aura about me already.
(12:39):
Yeah, what a good plug that is.
Well, yeah.
Speaker 1 (12:41):
Different needs some work, hasn't it?
A little plug there.
Speaker 2 (12:46):
I'm not wearing that shirt today, but no, honestly I
do.
I said it to you earlier on inthe pub, didn't I?
I went home last night fromwork and the first thing I did I
walked into the kitchen andslapped my missus' ass, and I
always used to do that because Iwas happy.
Yeah, and I felt yesterday shewent what's going on?
What's going on?
You say it.
Maybe I feel like I've just gotthis massive weight taken off
(13:08):
my shoulders.
I can spend more time at homewith my family.
Yes, I'm going to be working,but I'm going to be able to take
my boy to nursery in themorning.
I'm going to be able to pickhim up in the afternoon.
I'm going to be able to go andhave a round of golf.
If I want to go and have around of golf as long as I can
(13:29):
get, I want to be financially.
Speaker 1 (13:31):
Well, that's it, isn't it?
But you've got to weigh up.
I mean, we spoke about itbefore.
Speaker 2 (13:41):
Like financially free .
I'd much rather do somethingthat just about pays.
You ain't never going to befinancial free.
I don't give a shit who you are.
Speaker 1 (13:43):
No, it's bullshit, because you live within your
means.
If you're earning 10 grand amonth, you'll spend it.
If you're earning 10 grand amonth, you'll spend it.
If you're earning 1,000 a month, you'll spend it and you'll be
in the same situation.
But I would much rather dosomething that pays me enough
for a good life that I enjoyevery day than something that
pays me 10 times what I need andI fucking hate waking up every
(14:04):
morning.
100%, mate, 100%.
I don't think there's a lot ofpeople that chase the money too
much.
Speaker 2 (14:09):
The problem is, most of those people are really young
as well, because all they justget taught is that money is the
means to everything.
And you do especially like I'dhate to be 20.
Odd now, fuck me.
Like my boys, I dread beingthem right now, because all they
see is materialistic stuffInstagram, tiktok everywhere you
look, everyone's got millionsof pounds, even though they
haven't.
Yeah, you know, and you're justtaught to think like that all
(14:30):
the time.
And then, like when you get toour age or my age, I feel like
I'm in a kind of a midlifecrisis.
At the moment, I'm at thatpoint where I want to buy a
motorbike or buy a stupid car ordo something crazy, because I
feel like, actually, hang on,I'm about to to the end than I
(14:51):
am to the start, and I neverthought midlife crisis was a
thing, but genuinely I feel likeI'm getting there.
But then 20-year-olds if thereis anyone that's 20 that's
listening it ain't all about themoney.
Yeah, you've got to run out ofmoney to pay your bills and have
a nice gaff if you want a nicehouse or whatever, but at the
end of the day, you don't needall that materialistic shit.
Speaker 1 (15:11):
No, because that's all it is.
Speaker 2 (15:13):
Yeah, yeah, You're all on finance.
You're all strapped up to thebollocks with your credit limits
and your credit cards and allthat sort of stuff.
So actually you're just puttingmore pressure on yourself by
getting all that stuff.
Anyway.
Speaker 1 (15:24):
Yeah, I mean off any 20 year olds listening.
Learn, learn about investing,learning about assets over
liabilities.
It's all good and well drivinga 250,000 pound Lambo, but it
could all come crashing down.
Like we've said before, ifyou're doing TikTok shop and
you're doing really, really welland you think, oh, do you know
(15:46):
what?
I can afford to go out andfinance a Lambo and the final,
their five grand a month Mate,tomorrow someone could Keir
Starmer, because he's a bellend,could do something Put an 80%
tax on Lamborghinis.
Yeah, put an 80% tax onLamborghinis or he could shut
down TikTok.
Yeah, I think it's importantfor kids and this is the other
thing.
This is the school learn tomake your make a bit of money
(16:15):
and then let that money work foryou, let that money make you
more money and when that money'smaking you enough money for you
to buy that lambo or financethat lambo and not have to worry
about.
Speaker 2 (16:21):
Yeah, I'm glad you said that actually, because one
thing I would love to do is, ifI ever could afford it, I could
afford it.
I'd be better on thelamborghini, because I had the
picture on the wall when I was akid.
You know it was the LamborghiniContash and the fucking
horrible looking thing.
Now, if you actually look atthe picture of them, they were
disgusting.
But you know, if you can affordit, like you're saying, you're
not strapping yourself up Go andget one.
(16:42):
Go and get that fucking greatbig house that everyone's
jealous that you've got and goand live the lifestyle that
you've worked fucking hard toget.
But I mean, I know people intheir 20s that have got 15, 20
grand's worth of credit carddebt and, jesus Christ, if
you're in that much debt in your20s, you're fucked.
Yeah, and that's it, becauseit's not going away Nah you
ain't going to be able to paythat credit off.
Speaker 1 (17:09):
So all you're probably doing is paying the
interest?
Yeah, but that's the thing.
That's how they want you.
Speaker 2 (17:14):
That's how they want you.
You look at your mortgage.
You pay about four times whatyour house is worth over the
life of your 30-year mortgage.
Speaker 1 (17:20):
I looked Buy a ÂŁ300,000 over 30 years and your
interest is like ÂŁ290,000.
280, 290 grand at the moment.
You buy a house for 300 grandand it's costing you six.
Fuck that, yeah, and that'swhere you need to have money.
The thing is, if you keep itfor 30 years.
Speaker 2 (17:35):
You can look at it another way.
If you keep it for 30 years,it's going to be worth 600 grand
anyway, isn't it so exactly?
Speaker 1 (17:39):
you know, it's kind of but if you can put yourself
in a position where you you'regoing to save a hell of a lot of
money.
Yeah, yeah, one regret I made.
Speaker 2 (17:51):
Actually, to be fair, when my missus got our house 10
years ago, our mortgage wasnothing, Absolutely nothing,
Peanuts.
We were like, oh yeah, we'llhave that.
What we'll do is we'll pay thebare minimum and we'll just have
a really nice life.
Yeah, and it would have rippedour mortgage to pieces in 20 or
(18:14):
30 years.
You know Like we'd have hadhardly anything to pay.
But you don't think like that.
And since we're going back tothe 20s, you don't think like
that.
Speaker 1 (18:28):
I mean, I wasn't 20.
I was off my mortgage thismonth, but or I could go and do
that.
We could go away for a weekend,we'd go to Spain, we'd do this
and you do that because that'swhat.
Speaker 2 (18:36):
That's what benefits you now yeah, I mean I blame my
missus, to be fair.
She wanted free weddings, sothat's where all our money went
what to different men.
Yeah, exactly, she got marriedto Carlos in Spain.
She got married to Chris inEast Grinstead, and then
actually I'm not really sayingEast Grinstead, that's not where
I live, edit, that bit out.
Yeah, she got married to Carlosin Spain, to me in our hometown
(19:00):
and then me in another place,because we had to get married in
an registry office to getmarried in Spain.
Yeah, yeah, they do likespending money't they my wife's,
mine's, mine's amazing.
Speaker 1 (19:11):
I remember our first date my first date.
Speaker 2 (19:14):
Don't make me look like a no, no, no, no, not at
all, not at all.
Speaker 1 (19:18):
I'm just saying, I'm counting these times, I'm just
saying.
I'm just saying our first datewe went bowling, then went to a
Mackey's nice, fucking brilliant.
Now before my missus I wouldhave been like I'll need to take
her to a five-star restaurantdoing this, doing that, and you
really get to see who thatperson actually is, if you don't
(19:38):
pretend to be someone you'renot well if she has like chicken
nuggets or a cheeseburger.
Speaker 2 (19:42):
Just there's a difference there.
Isn't there as opposed to achild or as opposed to a filet
mignon.
Speaker 1 (19:48):
Um, but no, it was wicked.
Wicked mate.
I remember it.
I remember we went bowling.
We had a laugh.
Then we were hungry so we hadto drive an hour to the closest
McDonald's that was open.
Speaker 2 (19:58):
But we spent so much time in the car together and it
was like yeah, there's nothingelse to do other than talk when
you're in a car, is there?
Speaker 1 (20:03):
No, that's it, it's good, and that Podcasting a car
I thought was quite good.
Speaker 2 (20:07):
I took my missus to the pub that I used to work at
so I could get free drinks.
That was my first date.
She thought I was amazing.
We got absolutely steaming, itcost me nothing and we had the
table by the fire as well, whichis really romantic, because I
obviously told them to give methat table.
Speaker 1 (20:24):
Well, let's go back to what you said about the shit
they don't tell you Midlifecrisis is it real?
Yeah, 100% mate yeah.
I never thought when peopleused to mention it and they're
like, oh, you have a midlifecrisis, what the fuck is it?
I reckon my mate had one 10years ago at fucking 28, because
he was so sensible in his yearsof school and college.
(20:46):
He was so sensible.
I reckon he had a midlifecrisis at fucking 28 years old.
Speaker 2 (20:51):
I don't think mine's going to be too bad, because I
kind of had one in my 30s, early30s, when I split up with my
boy's mum.
I just had a couple of yearswhere I was just sort of going
out every weekend and justenjoying myself, so I kind of
celebrated.
I think the midlife crisis iswhen you get with somebody too
early and you don't actuallyexperience life too much.
(21:12):
It's quite a difficult thing tosay because obviously there's a
lot of people that may belistening that have been with
their partners for a long time.
I feel like if you don'texperience life, if you get
together too early and you don'tactually get to go through life
, experience different things,different people, different
partners or whatever, I thinkwhen you get to the age of about
(21:32):
40, 45, you probably go fuckinghell what I've actually done
with my life.
I haven't traveled, yeah, Ihaven't been anywhere, I've just
worked.
And now I am the other side of40 and, let's be honest, the
average age is what?
86 or something, is it not eventhat?
Is it something that?
So you are nearer to the end?
I hate saying that because itfeels so depressing.
Yeah, but it's true, you arenearer to the end than to the
(21:55):
start, and I think that's whypeople go fucking hell.
What have I done?
And then that's why they startdeep thinking oh, my God, I
haven't done this, I haven go.
Actually, I need to do this, Ineed to do that.
I can't do it with this personbecause we've got kids, or I
can't do it with this personbecause they won't let me, and
that's why relationships splitup, and that's what that midlife
(22:15):
crisis is all about.
And then they go out and buythe orange Ford Focus ST or
something like that.
Sorry, anyone that's got a FordFocus ST Orange kind of a.
Yeah, you know, and I thinkthat's where I am in a
comfortable place with my missus, because I lived my life I've
made.
So we talk about regrets.
We spoke about regrets, didn'twe?
(22:35):
In one of the ones we did.
I don't have any regrets inlife.
The only regret I have in mylife is not getting on an
aeroplane with Steve Parrish,who's the Palace Chairman the
Crystal Palace Chairman and thatis my wife's fault.
So if you're listening, darling, that is the only regret I have
.
I'm looking at the microphone.
That's you there and that isthe only regret I have, because
everything else that you'redoing throughout life just
(22:57):
teaches you to be a betterperson.
Speaker 1 (22:58):
Yeah, and the people that have regrets, don't have
regrets.
Speaker 2 (23:01):
What's the point?
Don't live for yesterday.
Live for today.
Speaker 1 (23:04):
Yeah, live for today and look for the future.
Look for the future.
Live for today and look for thefuture.
That's it, like I learned somuch.
Before I met my wife, um, I metsomeone who had a lovely little
boy.
He was four years old and,unfortunately, me and her just
didn't get on.
(23:24):
It just wasn't, wasn't for me,but I feel that was life testing
me.
To meet my missus who had afour-year-old child.
Could I be a father to someoneelse's kid?
And that was teaching me, yes,it could.
And like I remember, sitting ina car park, my missus said no,
(23:45):
come on, you go and live yourlife, and I'm so glad that I
didn't.
I've lived a life before I metmy current wife.
I've lived a life and I've madesome mistakes and I've got not
regrets.
Like you say, I've acted like adickhead, I've done things that
I'm not proud to admit, butit's all learning lessons and I
(24:08):
think if you learn from thosethings, as long as you learn
from those, so-called mistakes.
Speaker 2 (24:13):
Yeah, yeah, it's fine , isn't it?
Speaker 1 (24:15):
but it's the same in business, isn't it?
Of course it is.
You learn from your mistakes.
I learned from closing down afamily business a hell of a lot.
I've learned from working inbusinesses a hell of a lot, and
every day is a school day, and Idon't think you can be, Listen.
Speaker 2 (24:31):
That's why, when you drive past the pub that you
drove past 25 years ago, thepeople are still in that pub.
They're still outside drinkingon a Friday afternoon because
they don't learn from theirmistakes.
You know like they don't wantto progress in life, and the
only way you progress is bymaking mistakes and learning
from them.
If you make mistakes every weekand you just think oh well,
I'll carry on as I am, You'rejust going to carry on being
(24:52):
that same person, isn't you?
Speaker 1 (24:53):
Someone said the only way to break away from the mold
.
Today, in a group I was in, theonly way to break away from the
mold is to be extraordinary.
What's the fucking word?
Extraordinary, notextraordinary.
Extraordinary, kind of the same.
They sound the same, they don'tknow they do they do you know,
blow my mind a couple of pintsand I'm like, oh, one pint,
(25:15):
sorry one pint, and it's blowingmy mind.
But that's and again like astory I told you in that group
today, where someone's beenworking at a company since they
were 16.
They're now 57, they can'tretire for another 10 years and
they're counting down the daystill they retire at that company
they started at at 16.
That life's not for me, I'msorry.
Speaker 2 (25:37):
Yeah, I mean the thing is right.
The issue that we sort of theproblem we've got is right.
The way we go on about businessand everything, we feel like
we're preaching something here.
Speaker 1 (25:46):
It's important to mention that if you're happy
with that life, then be happywith that life.
Do you know what I mean?
Speaker 2 (25:51):
Some, people are just happy to go to work for a boss,
be told what to do, work eighttill five or eight till four,
whatever, and go home and justhave no stress whatsoever
Because it isn't, is it?
As long as you're earning moneyenough to pay for your bills
and everything, you can go homefrom work.
You can forget about yourday-to-day life and just enjoy
the evening with your wife oryour kids or on your own or
whatever you choose to do.
(26:11):
But I think it's quiteimportant to mention, because I
know we talk about business alot and I know we talk about
mental health and stuff andpeople may jump onto the podcast
and think well, actually know,they're not talking to me
because I work for somebody andI'm not interested in being an
entrepreneur or blah, blah, blahno, and I think, like I used to
work, when I was 17, I used towork at Sainsbury's in Havertief
(26:33):
my first job as well yeah.
Speaker 1 (26:35):
I used to work in Sainsbury's on the back door.
Used to work on the back doorseeing the lorries in unloading.
Speaker 2 (26:40):
I so wanted to go for a joke there.
Speaker 1 (26:44):
Working on the back door and the guy I worked with
had been doing the same jobsince the Sainsbury's opened,
which was a hell of a long time,and he loved it.
He wouldn't change it for theworld and he was a lovely bloke
and he was happy.
He knew his hours, he knew whathe had to do, he knew what he
was getting paid at the end ofthe month.
There was another guy there hewas, I'm gonna say he was in his
(27:07):
.
He was in his early 60s.
He had a heart attack in thewarehouse.
The ambulance come, took himaway.
Next day he was back there andhe loved it and he wouldn't
change it for the world.
So I'm not, and this is whatfucks me off about all these
people on tiktok and that sayingquit your job, quit your job
(27:28):
and be an entrepreneur.
Speaker 2 (27:29):
it's not for everyone .
That's why we called the untoldpodcast, isn't it?
Speaker 1 (27:33):
because that's it it's not for everyone.
There is, I've said it before.
I own a business.
I've got staff.
Every month comes around andI've got paid to start.
It's like having kids that haveworked their arse off for you
and you can't give them theirpocket money.
I know it's not pocket moneythat takes the piss out of the
staff, but you can't give themtheir wages.
That's right.
(27:53):
They won't hear this until theyedit it.
Yeah, exactly exactly whetherthey actually listen to it.
But there's a lot to be saidabout going on holiday.
I've said this before.
I've said it in videos on mypersonal page going on holiday,
turning your work phone off andenjoying two weeks for your
family I can't do that no, Ican't.
I can't go on holiday and nothave to do some sort of work,
(28:17):
answer some sort of emails, andI don't think, even if you're,
even if you're really successful, I don't think, even if you're
really successful, I don't thinkyou ever switch off when you're
an entrepreneur.
Speaker 2 (28:29):
Well, you can't do it .
If you're mega, mega successful, your brain is ticking more
than anybody else's brain everin any way.
Because that's why you're sosuccessful, because your brain
doesn't stop.
Speaker 1 (28:39):
It's mad though, isn't it?
It's mad Something else.
They never told you that?
Why?
Your brain will wake you up at3 o'clock in the morning and
think I know you suffer withthis because you told me the
other day I suffer with thisLike literally the most random
shit.
The most random shit.
My missus is funny.
She has weird dreams in thenight, like people chasing her
(29:03):
and all sorts.
Do you get that thing when youfall asleep, where you're like
falling, you jump yeah and youjump yeah, yeah, you know there
is, that is actually ascientific thing, though?
Speaker 2 (29:10):
is it so?
That is actually your body.
Your body falls asleep beforeyour brain and your brain thinks
your body is dying, so it joltsyour body.
It actually sends an electricalcurrent your body to make sure
that you're actually still alive, or the other way around.
One of the two, but that isactually so.
I dealt with that very, verybadly years and years ago really
badly to the point where, like,I nearly broke my foot Cause I
(29:31):
kicked the wall so hard so Ithought I'd do a bit of research
on it.
And genuinely, that is actuallya thing.
Your body, or your brain,thinks one or the other is
actually dying and it sends anelectrical current.
And it sends an electricalcurrent.
So it's obviously your brain toyour body, because obviously
your brain controls yourelectrical currents.
But yeah, it is actually anelectric shot to your body to
make sure you're still alive.
Speaker 1 (29:50):
Really it's mad that, it's mad that, but no one ever
told you.
Speaker 2 (29:54):
No one ever prepared you.
Science with Chris.
Science with Chris.
Never thought they'd be doingscience on the podcast.
Speaker 1 (30:01):
But no one did it, did they?
And this is something that Ifeel that they should warn you
for.
When you get into later lifeand you have a business, you
have a family, you have amortgage to pay, you have bills
to pay, they're going to hauntyou 24 hours a day.
How the fuck do you deal withit?
How do you?
I know for a fact I don't wantto put you on the spot here,
(30:22):
don't want to go too deep Me anddes went balls deep every day.
Yeah, he even said that hewanted to put the balls in.
Um, how do you deal with that?
How do you have?
Okay, so let's, we've got anexample here.
You've just decided to sack inyour comfort blanket your job
that you've done for howevermany years, to focus on t shop.
(30:43):
What the fuck's been goingthrough your head for the last
couple of weeks?
Speaker 2 (30:48):
Last couple of weeks.
To be honest, it's not thefinancial side of things, it's
the responsibilities as a humanbeing that I've been struggling
with.
It's letting I've got.
I mean, there's one guy thatworks for me Henry, his name is,
I'll call him out.
He's worked for me for fiveyears.
He's a fucking legend Always ontime, always turns up, always
does what he says he's going todo.
(31:09):
Yes, he's a bit fucking slowand a bit useless.
Sorry, henry, he won't listento this anyway, but he means a
lot to me.
He does mean a lot to me andI'd like to think that I'm the
kind of person that does careabout people a little bit too
much.
And it was important for methat I didn't just say there's
(31:29):
no work for you now.
You haven't got a job, goodbye.
He's just got his own gaffe ofhis misses and everything.
So I spoke to a mate of mineyesterday and he's now going to
go and work for him.
But that was my main worry.
My main worry was thatconversation that I was going to
have with him.
It was that conversation that Iwas going to have with him.
It was the conversation I wasgoing to have with my client,
because it was a thing.
I've worked for this client for10 years and they have paid me
very well.
They paid for all of myweddings.
(31:50):
It's something that I've hadthere as a fail safe constantly
for the last 10 years.
That's been my main stress.
I went live on TikTok lastnight until 11 o'clock.
I went to bed at about midnightlast night, fell asleep about 1
o'clock.
That wasn't because I wasthinking about anything, it was
because I had all the brightlights and the cameras and
everything in my face.
I slept like a baby.
(32:12):
Yeah, you know, because it's adifferent stress and that's the
stress that's been dealing with.
Don't get me wrong in a coupleof weeks that I didn't expect to
make.
I expected to make more.
That's when I lay there thatnight going fucking hell.
So if I do that every night forthe next three weeks, how am I
(32:32):
going to pay my mortgage?
You know like so you do getdifferent stresses, but you just
the best way to deal with themis to talk to people yeah, it is
, and face them head on yeahdon't you know?
if you're in debt, let's face it.
Probably 90% of the country isin debt right now, probably even
higher than that, isn't it?
To be fair, I would have saidif you're in debt.
(32:52):
If you can't pay your debts,speak to the debt company,
because, whatever anybody thinks, these debt companies ain't out
to kill you.
No, you know, if you ring themup and can't pay your debt, they
will help you out.
I don't care what company it is, they're not there to
absolutely destroy it.
The only time you need to get abailiff on your front door is
if you've ignored the fuck outof it.
Speaker 1 (33:10):
And that's it.
Or if you think you can beatthe system, which is me
sometimes, because I think it'sun, unright, I don't fuck knows.
I think it's morally wrong whatsome of the people do, like
council tax, for example, butWell, yeah, I mean.
Speaker 2 (33:27):
I live on a private estate, mate, not post-private
estate.
Private estate is a new buildand you pay your fees to live
there and we have to pay fullcouncil tax ÂŁ240 a month I'll
pay and they don't even dealwith the streets.
Speaker 1 (33:38):
They don't fix the roads they don't bury your head
in the sand when it comes toshit like that, and a lot of my
(34:00):
problems over the years havebeen with money.
It's always been.
Everything that wakes me up atfour in the morning has been
money, yeah, money related.
And now it's changing Like nowit's like I've moved on from
money because I've dealt withthat.
Speaker 2 (34:14):
Is that only because you've lived beyond your means?
Is that why you've beenworrying?
No, it was the business thing.
Speaker 1 (34:19):
Right.
The business was living beyondits means.
The rent increased, everythingincreased, the sales dropped
everything.
And when you've got a businesswhere the overheads are probably
25, 30 grand a month andretail's dying a death and
exchange rates are going in thewrong direction and transport's
getting more expensive, it was alot.
(34:40):
So I managed to deal with thatby getting rid of that Adapt.
But now my brain.
The other morning my parentsjust moved to Spain.
Yeah, a lot.
So I managed to deal with thatby getting rid of that adapt.
But now my brain.
The other morning my parentsjust moved to Spain, yeah, and
my mum's got a dog, took the dogwith them.
I woke up fucking four o'clockin the morning wondering what
they're gonna do with the dogwhen they come back for my
brother's wedding.
(35:01):
Like what the fuck man?
Maybe just like worrying, mate,once you get wired in.
Speaker 2 (35:06):
I actually think that's a thing.
So I think once you startworrying throughout your whole
life, I think you get addictedto worrying yeah, and that's
like my old man said to me.
Speaker 1 (35:14):
He used to say to me he said never be like me when I
was a kid, I was like you'reamazing, you're a fucking legend
, you've done this.
You're a good dad, you're agood husband, you've provided
for us all the years, you're anice friend, you've done
everything you possibly can foreverybody else.
And I think what he was sayingwas don't ever be like me, don't
ever be negative, don't ever bea worrier because he used to be
(35:38):
, and that's where I get a lotof it from, I think.
But I worry about shit I don'tneed to fucking about, but not
during the day, at four o'clockin the morning, when I'm trying
to get a good night's sleep.
Speaker 2 (35:48):
When nothing's going on, isn't it Once your brain
starts talking to yourself?
That's why I've been takingashwagandha.
Oh good, yes, I've got someother stuff.
Speaker 1 (35:56):
I've been taking ashwagandha.
Speaker 2 (35:59):
But what about you?
Your?
Speaker 1 (36:00):
brain Like it goes mad.
Speaker 2 (36:02):
I know it does yeah, I'm an over thinker, massive
over thinker, mate, reallyreally bad over thinker.
I'm trying to deal with thatright now, but it's very, very
difficult when you've done doneit for pretty much your whole
life.
But it's good as well yeah,don't get me wrong, I love it as
well as hate it, like I hate itmore than I love it.
But I love it so much aboutpeople without even them
(36:23):
realising.
You know anything about themBecause you watch their body
language, you watch the way theytalk to you, you watch how much
eye contact they give you, youlisten to voice notes, you look
at text messages.
You literally everything thatgoes on.
You are analysing everythingand 99.9% of the time I'm 100%
right.
Speaker 1 (36:41):
Yeah, yeah, I've always said my superpower is
being a great judge of charactersame kind of thing being able
to judge people out not judgepeople, but if anybody's
watching this on, YouTube.
Speaker 2 (36:52):
You can see me and Ash now looking at each other in
each other's eyes, seeing if wecan actually gauge anything
from each other.
I did it at a pub earlier on.
So don't worry, I've got hiscards numbered and I did it
before I signed a contract witha cunt.
Speaker 1 (37:04):
Yeah, you did as well .
Yeah so yeah.
But on that note, chris, onebit of advice you would give to
your 25 year old self don't getmarried in your early 20s.
Speaker 2 (37:16):
What were you going to say?
Don't get married?
No, probably, just fuckingenjoy yourself.
Yeah, don't put too muchpressure on yourself.
Don't try and fall in love,don't try and have a family,
don't try and do anything otherthan just have fun.
And if I mean if that's yourfun, but it's up to you.
But yeah, 20s, 20s, just go outthere and just enjoy it.
Speaker 1 (37:37):
Enjoy it, man enjoy it travel if someone gives you
the opportunity to go and travel.
Speaker 2 (37:43):
Actually I said I don't have any regrets.
That's.
The one regret I do have,actually, is that I haven't
travelled.
I'd love to.
I still I'd love to go toThailand.
So if there's anybody watchingthat lives in Thailand and
they've got a nice five, sixbedroom villa that we could go
and do the podcast from we'd bemore than happy.
Speaker 1 (38:00):
That I've said was travel yeah, but it's in the 10
year plan to travel.
Yeah, I'll do it with my wife,my best friend, my soul mate.
Yeah, let's fucking do itanyway, chris, that's been
beautiful.
Speaker 2 (38:14):
That was a bit fucking sickening, yeah, but
it's true though, isn't?
Speaker 1 (38:17):
it.
Speaker 2 (38:17):
I love you too, darling.
Yeah, you're my best friend too.
No, she actually is.
I shouldn't laugh at that,listen they support us in doing
this.
Speaker 1 (38:25):
They support us in doing this anyway, chris.
That was blinding.
Speaker 2 (38:29):
I think we'll have to have a beer before the next one
as well, actually we'll have tohave a beer now we'll go to the
pub yeah, come on, let's go ifyou watched, thank you very much
.
Speaker 1 (38:39):
If you listened, thank you very much.
We need your support.
Like it, share it, feed it.
We're looking for sponsors, umto help us go to the next level,
and we're looking for guests.
So, if you've got, if you'vegot, if you've got an
interesting story that you wantto tell, come and sit in this
chair, because I don't knowwhere des is coming back from
(39:00):
manchester.
So come sit in this chair andtell us all about your story.
Maybe it can help someone out.
Thanks for watching.
We'll see you next week.
Cheers, guys, take care.
Hello and welcome to the Untold Podcast.
Today I'm here with Chris.
Hello everybody, it's just ustwo, isn't it?
Because Des couldn't make it.
What's Des up to?
Speaker 2 (00:11):
Well, he's got an excuse, but I feel like he just
can't be arsed.
Yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 1 (00:16):
Well, I reckon that he's sold a shed load of tickets
to an event in Manchester hashe got an event on.
Yeah, he's got an event on, hashe?
Speaker 2 (00:23):
The In Manchester.
Has he got an event on?
Yeah, he's got an event on.
Has he 30th of May, the Des?
Speaker 1 (00:25):
Hamilton Roadshow, but I reckon he's sold a
shitload of tickets and he don'thave a venue yet.
So I think he's driven up toManchester to try and knock on
people's doors and say can youhost my Hamilton Roadshow To be?
Speaker 2 (00:36):
fair.
I did hear him eating during avoice note in the car, so you
could be right then, mate, buthe's always eating in a voice
note.
Well, this is it.
He's always in his car.
To be fair, he's always eatingin a voice note.
Bless him.
Speaker 1 (00:52):
So I reckon we've been to the pub, we've had a
pint, which has loosened us up.
Speaker 2 (00:56):
Lucy Lucy.
Speaker 1 (00:58):
I thought we'd just chat shit about things in life,
go for it.
So the shit.
They never told us when we weregrowing up.
So how bad mornings hit afteryou hit to 35 fucking hell
hangovers lasting I mean, Idon't know about you, but this
(01:18):
is three days, but mine areprobably closer to two weeks you
ever had it.
Speaker 2 (01:22):
it depends how hard you hit it, mate, didn't it to
be 30?
At the end of the day, I've hadhangovers for two weeks easy.
Speaker 1 (01:27):
You go out and have a drink I'm never drinking again.
I'm never drinking again andyou wake up the next morning and
you're like I'm still notdrinking again.
Speaker 2 (01:35):
It's usually the afternoon and someone goes do
you want a beer?
No, it doesn't, of course youdon't.
Speaker 1 (01:42):
I remember we used to go to.
We used to go to A friend'shouse and as lads, like 18 year
olds, he used to love us, havingus around.
Sadly he passed away, but weused to go there and we used to
get Absolutely spangled On aSaturday night and then on a
Sunday We'd play cards and he'dlove To see us all suffering
(02:03):
Tequila shots on a sundayafternoon while he's there on a
barbecue cooking shrimps andstuff.
But that hangover.
I wish I could go back to thedays when a hangover literally
lasted a couple of hours in themorning.
Speaker 2 (02:14):
Yeah, I felt I only had a hangover, proper hangover,
in my 20s, probably twice, andthat was because I drunk like a
whole bottle of jack daniel'sover blind about three hours, or
it was a litre bottle of vodkain about 20 minutes for a bit.
But yeah, mate, honestly, howold are you?
I don't know, 37, I think.
Yeah, I'm 42, mate.
If you're getting hangoverslike that now, you're fucked.
Oh, for fuck's sake, Iliterally have to.
(02:35):
I've had.
I've had.
I've had a pint at the pub andwe got a beer here.
Speaker 1 (02:40):
I'll probably a hangover in 20 minutes after the
episode oh god but who cares?
I'm going to have another swigof my drink what's, and I was
going to save this for anotherepisode.
But what's your first memory ofdrinking?
Speaker 2 (02:57):
Dave Garrett's house, probably 1996, something like
that.
That was that bottle of JackDaniels, but I was about 13,.
I think Mum and dad had justsplit up.
Thankfully, david Garrett's mumwas an absolute legend.
I got so paralytic on NewYear's Eve that I spent three
days in his bed throwing up allover his bedroom, and his mum
told my mum that I was justhaving lots of fun, jesus.
Speaker 1 (03:20):
I remember you know your parents.
They used to do the thing andthey used to be like oh, you're
going to that party, we'll goand get you a couple of drinks.
Parents, come up before WKDBlues.
Wkd Blues.
Yes mate, I don't know.
I reckon I was 14, and I waslike that's it.
Speaker 2 (03:38):
It's around 14, isn't ?
Speaker 1 (03:39):
it.
Speaker 2 (03:40):
Yeah, it's got like 14, 15 years of age.
It's got like 14, 15 years ofage, that's when you go for it.
Speaker 1 (03:43):
And I was like no, that's not enough.
So I had this drink.
It's like a bureau thing in thecorner of the room Like all
that maple and stuff.
I opened it up.
There's a litre and a half ofPimms in there.
I was like I'll fucking takethat.
So I took that and my WKD Blues.
Now, to this day, familieswhose house it was still calls
(04:05):
me Pim's boy.
Nice, I went there.
Speaker 2 (04:08):
I've heard the worst things to be called to be fair
happy thing.
Speaker 1 (04:11):
It's amazing how that sticks, though, but I was why
pick?
Speaker 2 (04:14):
you could have picked something decent, I don't
fucking know.
Speaker 1 (04:17):
It's like 10% or something you could have gone
for the full age.
You could go for it.
After you drink a litre of itmate.
Speaker 2 (04:22):
Jesus Christ, no wonder you're real, especially
with lemonade.
Speaker 1 (04:26):
The thing is as well is I fancied the pants off of
this girl whose house it was.
Not the mum.
I'm in with the cool kids.
I'm in with the cool no, notthe mum.
I'm in with the cool kids.
I've been invited to the coolkids party like fucking and I
(04:50):
absolutely fucking ruined it andI was still called pims boy by
the girl and her family untilthis fucking day those years
later pims boy, I'm gonna startcalling you that for now.
I'm gonna change I'm actuallygonna do it.
While I was sitting, I'm gonnachange your name on my phone to
p Boy and then, when I go, totext you in a couple of weeks'
time.
Speaker 2 (05:05):
I will have no idea where your phone number's gone,
because I won't remember that.
Speaker 1 (05:09):
Oh dear, look a bit deeper, shit they never told you
.
Balancing, balancing, fuckinglife and family.
Obviously you've got a kid.
You've got a wife Balancingfucking life and family.
Obviously you've got a kid.
You've got a wife Balancinglife and family.
That's like it's hard, isn't it?
It's hard Like we've just beento the pub for a pint.
(05:30):
Do you feel guilty?
Speaker 2 (05:32):
No, do you feel guilty doing that?
No, not at all, because I workmy fucking nuts off.
Speaker 1 (05:35):
And I think that's a big thing as well.
I do it I like, so that's likeI'll say to the missus.
I'm going out on the motorbiketomorrow morning, or I've just
started playing golf.
I'm absolutely terrible at it,but when it's going good I quite
enjoy it.
And my reasoning with myself isit's eight o'clock on a Sunday
morning, we play.
(05:55):
I get five, six, 7,000 steps in.
I'm out in the sun, I'm gettingfresh air.
That's my reasoning with myselfto be able to do it.
Speaker 2 (06:07):
Yeah, I mean, before we go any further, I'd just like
to say, obviously I've knownyou for about three months now.
You know I play golf, so wherethe fuck's my invite at 8
o'clock on a Sunday morning?
Speaker 1 (06:14):
alright, well, you did play golf.
You said you retired.
Speaker 2 (06:17):
Well, no, I gave it up because I'm working hard, but
you know 8 o'clock on a Sundaymorning actually, to be fair, I
am live on TikTok at 8 o'clockin the morning on a Sunday.
Speaker 1 (06:24):
Yeah, I'll be live.
I'll be live.
Yeah, I'll be live on a Sundaymorning.
Speaker 2 (06:27):
Yeah fair point.
I'll take that one back.
There you go.
Erm, yeah, no, I don't feelguilty because, at the end of
the day, like my missus works aswell, my missus does work hard.
We're all about mental healthhere, right?
So let's just, let's just let'sjust unpack that a little bit
(06:48):
for me.
I overthink everything and I'mstruggling all the time to just
comprehend what is going on inmy life and how I'm dealing with
this and dealing with that.
So, if I have a beer, that halfhour that we spent at the pub
is my wind down time.
I don't get a wind down timeotherwise, because I go home
from work, as I said in theprevious podcast, my little
boy's all over me, which Iabsolutely love, wouldn't change
(07:09):
for the world, but you don'tget that on one time.
And, yeah, my missus probablydoesn't get it as well, but she
does do things without realisingshe's doing things that she
should be unwinding with, youknow.
So I think it's important toknow that you can have a little
bit of time to yourself.
You shouldn't feel guilty fordoing things like having a beer
with your mate or, you know,going for a walk and not taking
(07:29):
your family, or just doingsomething for yourself.
Everybody should do somethingfor themselves.
Speaker 1 (07:33):
Everyone should, because if you're not happy in
your own self.
Speaker 2 (07:36):
No one else is going to be happy around you.
Speaker 1 (07:37):
You're shit to everyone else, aren't you, if
you're not happy?
But you've got to have thattime, you've got to have it.
When I'm out on the motorbikeon a Sunday morning going to the
CAF on the beach with a coupleof mates, I'm normally back by
10, 11, sometimes four in theafternoon, depends how the ride
(07:58):
goes.
But I'm so lucky that I've gota wife that understands that I
feel like you're going for me?
Speaker 2 (08:05):
No, I'm not going for you.
You're talking about golf andthen talking about motorbikes.
Speaker 1 (08:07):
Motorbikes.
Speaker 2 (08:07):
Well, you haven't got a motorbike.
I've given up on the golf and Isold my motorbike 15 years ago
and I'm not allowed to getanother motorbike because my
missus won't let me.
Yeah, but it's actually gettingon, the bike that she's not too
(08:28):
keen on.
Speaker 1 (08:29):
And I love it when my wife goes out.
I do.
I love it when she goes out andlets her hair down.
She doesn't do it enough and Ithink she feels more guilty than
I do.
She has this guilt of oh yeah,but I can't go out and enjoy
your time with your friendsbecause not being horrible, but
you're so much nicer and betterto be around after you've let
(08:49):
your hair down yeah, my missusis the same, you know she says,
oh, you're my world and I don'twant to be away from you and
stuff like that.
Speaker 2 (08:55):
But you need that little break, you know, because
it makes you feel fonder if yougo home and you're like, oh, how
was your evening or what didyou do?
And you know it makes moreconversation, you feel better in
yourself and it is important todo like, like you, I love it
when my missus goes out of hermates.
Speaker 1 (09:11):
She just chooses not to go out that much yeah, mine
does as well, and I don't knowwhat it is.
She's got a lovely group ofmates and like go out, go go.
Obviously not every other day,but yeah go out and enjoy it.
I think you've got to do it,sort of like I say to my mates
like we should do stuff.
You probably do it.
You go out with your mates andyou'll go on a stag, do yeah,
(09:34):
and you all get together onceevery year, once every six
months maybe, if you're lucky,and every time you end the
weekend, you end the day, andyou're like we should do this
more often you never fucking doit.
Speaker 2 (09:43):
Yeah, yeah, we have.
Yeah, it was funny enough.
Speaker 1 (09:45):
The text messages went out a couple of weeks ago.
Speaker 2 (09:47):
Yeah, why is that?
I don't know.
I think it's just life and itjust gets so caught up in thing
is everybody gets in the ratrace, don't they get up?
Get up in the morning, you haveto go to work, you have to earn
a living, you have to pay yourbills.
You get home from work, you'reknackered.
In the uk we work, we live towork.
Yeah, similar to that.
You live because you have topay your bills.
Speaker 1 (10:06):
How do you change the narrative, though?
Do you know what I mean?
Should we be prioritisingourselves more?
Speaker 2 (10:13):
Selfishly should we be prioritising ourselves more.
It's difficult to talk aboutthis situation because
everybody's different, but welive in a very materialistic
life, don't we?
In a world where everybody ismaterialistic, you want
everything that's nice.
You want the nice house, youwant a nice garden, you want the
nice cars.
Depends on what actually youwant out of life.
If you want to be happy, don'tstrive for all that, yeah,
(10:34):
because that won't make youhappy.
It just causes you more stress.
Speaker 1 (10:37):
Time isn't it.
It's finding time we.
We manage to find times for, wemanage to find time for the
things that don't fill us withjoy.
We managed to find time forwork, to do that quote, to go
out and please that customer,but we never we put ourselves
back.
We put ourselves on a backburner, where I feel that we all
(11:00):
should put ourselves at thefront, cause if you're not happy
, then you're done.
Speaker 2 (11:04):
So the one thing I always used to say to people
because if you're not happy,then you're done.
So one thing I always used tosay to people is if you don't
love yourself you, then how'sanyone ever gonna love you?
Yeah, and I think that's reallyimportant to mention, because
if you just live your life foreverybody else all of the time,
it makes you unhappy.
And if you're unhappy, you'reactually doing the complete
opposite to what you're tryingto achieve by making everyone
else up around you your family,your kids, your wife, your, you
(11:24):
know your friends and everything.
What you're trying to achieveby making everyone else up
around you your family, yourkids, your wife, your friends
and everything.
If you're a miserable bastardto be around, they're not going
to want to be around you anyway.
Speaker 1 (11:30):
That's it, and it's so difficult.
I reckon that anybody listeninglook back at it.
Can you make more time foryourself without fucking up
everything?
I bet you can.
I bet, if you look back at it,you can, I bet you can, I bet,
if you look back at it, you can,I bet you can make it.
Well, ask me in three monthstime and I'll tell you Well,
that's it.
Speaker 2 (11:47):
Because I've just done it you know that's it.
Speaker 1 (11:48):
That's it.
You've made fucking 24 sevenfor yourself mate yeah mate.
Speaker 2 (11:52):
Yeah, You've made 24 seven for yourself but, hats off
to and hopefully everyone'sreally worried that I wasn't
going to come back because ofthe conversation we had in the
car.
But I've actually made thedecision.
I've done it now.
I've told the client, I've toldthe guys that work for me that
(12:16):
they're not working for meanymore.
I'm going to fold the businessin two and a half weeks' time
about two two and a half weeks'time when I finish the job in
London, I'm going balls deep inTikTok and putting as much
effort into the podcast as Ipossibly can now, and the more I
think about it, the more I'vechanged already, mate.
Yeah, I feel like I've got adifferent aura about me already.
(12:39):
Yeah, what a good plug that is.
Well, yeah.
Speaker 1 (12:41):
Different needs some work, hasn't it?
A little plug there.
Speaker 2 (12:46):
I'm not wearing that shirt today, but no, honestly I
do.
I said it to you earlier on inthe pub, didn't I?
I went home last night fromwork and the first thing I did I
walked into the kitchen andslapped my missus' ass, and I
always used to do that because Iwas happy.
Yeah, and I felt yesterday shewent what's going on?
What's going on?
You say it.
Maybe I feel like I've just gotthis massive weight taken off
(13:08):
my shoulders.
I can spend more time at homewith my family.
Yes, I'm going to be working,but I'm going to be able to take
my boy to nursery in themorning.
I'm going to be able to pickhim up in the afternoon.
I'm going to be able to go andhave a round of golf.
If I want to go and have around of golf as long as I can
(13:29):
get, I want to be financially.
Speaker 1 (13:31):
Well, that's it, isn't it?
But you've got to weigh up.
I mean, we spoke about itbefore.
Speaker 2 (13:41):
Like financially free .
I'd much rather do somethingthat just about pays.
You ain't never going to befinancial free.
I don't give a shit who you are.
Speaker 1 (13:43):
No, it's bullshit, because you live within your
means.
If you're earning 10 grand amonth, you'll spend it.
If you're earning 10 grand amonth, you'll spend it.
If you're earning 1,000 a month, you'll spend it and you'll be
in the same situation.
But I would much rather dosomething that pays me enough
for a good life that I enjoyevery day than something that
pays me 10 times what I need andI fucking hate waking up every
(14:04):
morning.
100%, mate, 100%.
I don't think there's a lot ofpeople that chase the money too
much.
Speaker 2 (14:09):
The problem is, most of those people are really young
as well, because all they justget taught is that money is the
means to everything.
And you do especially like I'dhate to be 20.
Odd now, fuck me.
Like my boys, I dread beingthem right now, because all they
see is materialistic stuffInstagram, tiktok everywhere you
look, everyone's got millionsof pounds, even though they
haven't.
Yeah, you know, and you're justtaught to think like that all
(14:30):
the time.
And then, like when you get toour age or my age, I feel like
I'm in a kind of a midlifecrisis.
At the moment, I'm at thatpoint where I want to buy a
motorbike or buy a stupid car ordo something crazy, because I
feel like, actually, hang on,I'm about to to the end than I
(14:51):
am to the start, and I neverthought midlife crisis was a
thing, but genuinely I feel likeI'm getting there.
But then 20-year-olds if thereis anyone that's 20 that's
listening it ain't all about themoney.
Yeah, you've got to run out ofmoney to pay your bills and have
a nice gaff if you want a nicehouse or whatever, but at the
end of the day, you don't needall that materialistic shit.
Speaker 1 (15:11):
No, because that's all it is.
Speaker 2 (15:13):
Yeah, yeah, You're all on finance.
You're all strapped up to thebollocks with your credit limits
and your credit cards and allthat sort of stuff.
So actually you're just puttingmore pressure on yourself by
getting all that stuff.
Anyway.
Speaker 1 (15:24):
Yeah, I mean off any 20 year olds listening.
Learn, learn about investing,learning about assets over
liabilities.
It's all good and well drivinga 250,000 pound Lambo, but it
could all come crashing down.
Like we've said before, ifyou're doing TikTok shop and
you're doing really, really welland you think, oh, do you know
(15:46):
what?
I can afford to go out andfinance a Lambo and the final,
their five grand a month Mate,tomorrow someone could Keir
Starmer, because he's a bellend,could do something Put an 80%
tax on Lamborghinis.
Yeah, put an 80% tax onLamborghinis or he could shut
down TikTok.
Yeah, I think it's importantfor kids and this is the other
thing.
This is the school learn tomake your make a bit of money
(16:15):
and then let that money work foryou, let that money make you
more money and when that money'smaking you enough money for you
to buy that lambo or financethat lambo and not have to worry
about.
Speaker 2 (16:21):
Yeah, I'm glad you said that actually, because one
thing I would love to do is, ifI ever could afford it, I could
afford it.
I'd be better on thelamborghini, because I had the
picture on the wall when I was akid.
You know it was the LamborghiniContash and the fucking
horrible looking thing.
Now, if you actually look atthe picture of them, they were
disgusting.
But you know, if you can affordit, like you're saying, you're
not strapping yourself up Go andget one.
(16:42):
Go and get that fucking greatbig house that everyone's
jealous that you've got and goand live the lifestyle that
you've worked fucking hard toget.
But I mean, I know people intheir 20s that have got 15, 20
grand's worth of credit carddebt and, jesus Christ, if
you're in that much debt in your20s, you're fucked.
Yeah, and that's it, becauseit's not going away Nah you
ain't going to be able to paythat credit off.
Speaker 1 (17:09):
So all you're probably doing is paying the
interest?
Yeah, but that's the thing.
That's how they want you.
Speaker 2 (17:14):
That's how they want you.
You look at your mortgage.
You pay about four times whatyour house is worth over the
life of your 30-year mortgage.
Speaker 1 (17:20):
I looked Buy a ÂŁ300,000 over 30 years and your
interest is like ÂŁ290,000.
280, 290 grand at the moment.
You buy a house for 300 grandand it's costing you six.
Fuck that, yeah, and that'swhere you need to have money.
The thing is, if you keep itfor 30 years.
Speaker 2 (17:35):
You can look at it another way.
If you keep it for 30 years,it's going to be worth 600 grand
anyway, isn't it so exactly?
Speaker 1 (17:39):
you know, it's kind of but if you can put yourself
in a position where you you'regoing to save a hell of a lot of
money.
Yeah, yeah, one regret I made.
Speaker 2 (17:51):
Actually, to be fair, when my missus got our house 10
years ago, our mortgage wasnothing, Absolutely nothing,
Peanuts.
We were like, oh yeah, we'llhave that.
What we'll do is we'll pay thebare minimum and we'll just have
a really nice life.
Yeah, and it would have rippedour mortgage to pieces in 20 or
(18:14):
30 years.
You know Like we'd have hadhardly anything to pay.
But you don't think like that.
And since we're going back tothe 20s, you don't think like
that.
Speaker 1 (18:28):
I mean, I wasn't 20.
I was off my mortgage thismonth, but or I could go and do
that.
We could go away for a weekend,we'd go to Spain, we'd do this
and you do that because that'swhat.
Speaker 2 (18:36):
That's what benefits you now yeah, I mean I blame my
missus, to be fair.
She wanted free weddings, sothat's where all our money went
what to different men.
Yeah, exactly, she got marriedto Carlos in Spain.
She got married to Chris inEast Grinstead, and then
actually I'm not really sayingEast Grinstead, that's not where
I live, edit, that bit out.
Yeah, she got married to Carlosin Spain, to me in our hometown
(19:00):
and then me in another place,because we had to get married in
an registry office to getmarried in Spain.
Yeah, yeah, they do likespending money't they my wife's,
mine's, mine's amazing.
Speaker 1 (19:11):
I remember our first date my first date.
Speaker 2 (19:14):
Don't make me look like a no, no, no, no, not at
all, not at all.
Speaker 1 (19:18):
I'm just saying, I'm counting these times, I'm just
saying.
I'm just saying our first datewe went bowling, then went to a
Mackey's nice, fucking brilliant.
Now before my missus I wouldhave been like I'll need to take
her to a five-star restaurantdoing this, doing that, and you
really get to see who thatperson actually is, if you don't
(19:38):
pretend to be someone you'renot well if she has like chicken
nuggets or a cheeseburger.
Speaker 2 (19:42):
Just there's a difference there.
Isn't there as opposed to achild or as opposed to a filet
mignon.
Speaker 1 (19:48):
Um, but no, it was wicked.
Wicked mate.
I remember it.
I remember we went bowling.
We had a laugh.
Then we were hungry so we hadto drive an hour to the closest
McDonald's that was open.
Speaker 2 (19:58):
But we spent so much time in the car together and it
was like yeah, there's nothingelse to do other than talk when
you're in a car, is there?
Speaker 1 (20:03):
No, that's it, it's good, and that Podcasting a car
I thought was quite good.
Speaker 2 (20:07):
I took my missus to the pub that I used to work at
so I could get free drinks.
That was my first date.
She thought I was amazing.
We got absolutely steaming, itcost me nothing and we had the
table by the fire as well, whichis really romantic, because I
obviously told them to give methat table.
Speaker 1 (20:24):
Well, let's go back to what you said about the shit
they don't tell you Midlifecrisis is it real?
Yeah, 100% mate yeah.
I never thought when peopleused to mention it and they're
like, oh, you have a midlifecrisis, what the fuck is it?
I reckon my mate had one 10years ago at fucking 28, because
he was so sensible in his yearsof school and college.
(20:46):
He was so sensible.
I reckon he had a midlifecrisis at fucking 28 years old.
Speaker 2 (20:51):
I don't think mine's going to be too bad, because I
kind of had one in my 30s, early30s, when I split up with my
boy's mum.
I just had a couple of yearswhere I was just sort of going
out every weekend and justenjoying myself, so I kind of
celebrated.
I think the midlife crisis iswhen you get with somebody too
early and you don't actuallyexperience life too much.
(21:12):
It's quite a difficult thing tosay because obviously there's a
lot of people that may belistening that have been with
their partners for a long time.
I feel like if you don'texperience life, if you get
together too early and you don'tactually get to go through life
, experience different things,different people, different
partners or whatever, I thinkwhen you get to the age of about
(21:32):
40, 45, you probably go fuckinghell what I've actually done
with my life.
I haven't traveled, yeah, Ihaven't been anywhere, I've just
worked.
And now I am the other side of40 and, let's be honest, the
average age is what?
86 or something, is it not eventhat?
Is it something that?
So you are nearer to the end?
I hate saying that because itfeels so depressing.
Yeah, but it's true, you arenearer to the end than to the
(21:55):
start, and I think that's whypeople go fucking hell.
What have I done?
And then that's why they startdeep thinking oh, my God, I
haven't done this, I haven go.
Actually, I need to do this, Ineed to do that.
I can't do it with this personbecause we've got kids, or I
can't do it with this personbecause they won't let me, and
that's why relationships splitup, and that's what that midlife
(22:15):
crisis is all about.
And then they go out and buythe orange Ford Focus ST or
something like that.
Sorry, anyone that's got a FordFocus ST Orange kind of a.
Yeah, you know, and I thinkthat's where I am in a
comfortable place with my missus, because I lived my life I've
made.
So we talk about regrets.
We spoke about regrets, didn'twe?
(22:35):
In one of the ones we did.
I don't have any regrets inlife.
The only regret I have in mylife is not getting on an
aeroplane with Steve Parrish,who's the Palace Chairman the
Crystal Palace Chairman and thatis my wife's fault.
So if you're listening, darling, that is the only regret I have
.
I'm looking at the microphone.
That's you there and that isthe only regret I have, because
everything else that you'redoing throughout life just
(22:57):
teaches you to be a betterperson.
Speaker 1 (22:58):
Yeah, and the people that have regrets, don't have
regrets.
Speaker 2 (23:01):
What's the point?
Don't live for yesterday.
Live for today.
Speaker 1 (23:04):
Yeah, live for today and look for the future.
Look for the future.
Live for today and look for thefuture.
That's it, like I learned somuch.
Before I met my wife, um, I metsomeone who had a lovely little
boy.
He was four years old and,unfortunately, me and her just
didn't get on.
(23:24):
It just wasn't, wasn't for me,but I feel that was life testing
me.
To meet my missus who had afour-year-old child.
Could I be a father to someoneelse's kid?
And that was teaching me, yes,it could.
And like I remember, sitting ina car park, my missus said no,
(23:45):
come on, you go and live yourlife, and I'm so glad that I
didn't.
I've lived a life before I metmy current wife.
I've lived a life and I've madesome mistakes and I've got not
regrets.
Like you say, I've acted like adickhead, I've done things that
I'm not proud to admit, butit's all learning lessons and I
(24:08):
think if you learn from thosethings, as long as you learn
from those, so-called mistakes.
Speaker 2 (24:13):
Yeah, yeah, it's fine , isn't it?
Speaker 1 (24:15):
but it's the same in business, isn't it?
Of course it is.
You learn from your mistakes.
I learned from closing down afamily business a hell of a lot.
I've learned from working inbusinesses a hell of a lot, and
every day is a school day, and Idon't think you can be, Listen.
Speaker 2 (24:31):
That's why, when you drive past the pub that you
drove past 25 years ago, thepeople are still in that pub.
They're still outside drinkingon a Friday afternoon because
they don't learn from theirmistakes.
You know like they don't wantto progress in life, and the
only way you progress is bymaking mistakes and learning
from them.
If you make mistakes every weekand you just think oh well,
I'll carry on as I am, You'rejust going to carry on being
(24:52):
that same person, isn't you?
Speaker 1 (24:53):
Someone said the only way to break away from the mold
.
Today, in a group I was in, theonly way to break away from the
mold is to be extraordinary.
What's the fucking word?
Extraordinary, notextraordinary.
Extraordinary, kind of the same.
They sound the same, they don'tknow they do they do you know,
blow my mind a couple of pintsand I'm like, oh, one pint,
(25:15):
sorry one pint, and it's blowingmy mind.
But that's and again like astory I told you in that group
today, where someone's beenworking at a company since they
were 16.
They're now 57, they can'tretire for another 10 years and
they're counting down the daystill they retire at that company
they started at at 16.
That life's not for me, I'msorry.
Speaker 2 (25:37):
Yeah, I mean the thing is right.
The issue that we sort of theproblem we've got is right.
The way we go on about businessand everything, we feel like
we're preaching something here.
Speaker 1 (25:46):
It's important to mention that if you're happy
with that life, then be happywith that life.
Do you know what I mean?
Speaker 2 (25:51):
Some, people are just happy to go to work for a boss,
be told what to do, work eighttill five or eight till four,
whatever, and go home and justhave no stress whatsoever
Because it isn't, is it?
As long as you're earning moneyenough to pay for your bills
and everything, you can go homefrom work.
You can forget about yourday-to-day life and just enjoy
the evening with your wife oryour kids or on your own or
whatever you choose to do.
(26:11):
But I think it's quiteimportant to mention, because I
know we talk about business alot and I know we talk about
mental health and stuff andpeople may jump onto the podcast
and think well, actually know,they're not talking to me
because I work for somebody andI'm not interested in being an
entrepreneur or blah, blah, blahno, and I think, like I used to
work, when I was 17, I used towork at Sainsbury's in Havertief
(26:33):
my first job as well yeah.
Speaker 1 (26:35):
I used to work in Sainsbury's on the back door.
Used to work on the back doorseeing the lorries in unloading.
Speaker 2 (26:40):
I so wanted to go for a joke there.
Speaker 1 (26:44):
Working on the back door and the guy I worked with
had been doing the same jobsince the Sainsbury's opened,
which was a hell of a long time,and he loved it.
He wouldn't change it for theworld and he was a lovely bloke
and he was happy.
He knew his hours, he knew whathe had to do, he knew what he
was getting paid at the end ofthe month.
There was another guy there hewas, I'm gonna say he was in his
(27:07):
.
He was in his early 60s.
He had a heart attack in thewarehouse.
The ambulance come, took himaway.
Next day he was back there andhe loved it and he wouldn't
change it for the world.
So I'm not, and this is whatfucks me off about all these
people on tiktok and that sayingquit your job, quit your job
(27:28):
and be an entrepreneur.
Speaker 2 (27:29):
it's not for everyone .
That's why we called the untoldpodcast, isn't it?
Speaker 1 (27:33):
because that's it it's not for everyone.
There is, I've said it before.
I own a business.
I've got staff.
Every month comes around andI've got paid to start.
It's like having kids that haveworked their arse off for you
and you can't give them theirpocket money.
I know it's not pocket moneythat takes the piss out of the
staff, but you can't give themtheir wages.
That's right.
(27:53):
They won't hear this until theyedit it.
Yeah, exactly exactly whetherthey actually listen to it.
But there's a lot to be saidabout going on holiday.
I've said this before.
I've said it in videos on mypersonal page going on holiday,
turning your work phone off andenjoying two weeks for your
family I can't do that no, Ican't.
I can't go on holiday and nothave to do some sort of work,
(28:17):
answer some sort of emails, andI don't think, even if you're,
even if you're really successful, I don't think, even if you're
really successful, I don't thinkyou ever switch off when you're
an entrepreneur.
Speaker 2 (28:29):
Well, you can't do it .
If you're mega, mega successful, your brain is ticking more
than anybody else's brain everin any way.
Because that's why you're sosuccessful, because your brain
doesn't stop.
Speaker 1 (28:39):
It's mad though, isn't it?
It's mad Something else.
They never told you that?
Why?
Your brain will wake you up at3 o'clock in the morning and
think I know you suffer withthis because you told me the
other day I suffer with thisLike literally the most random
shit.
The most random shit.
My missus is funny.
She has weird dreams in thenight, like people chasing her
(29:03):
and all sorts.
Do you get that thing when youfall asleep, where you're like
falling, you jump yeah and youjump yeah, yeah, you know there
is, that is actually ascientific thing, though?
Speaker 2 (29:10):
is it so?
That is actually your body.
Your body falls asleep beforeyour brain and your brain thinks
your body is dying, so it joltsyour body.
It actually sends an electricalcurrent your body to make sure
that you're actually still alive, or the other way around.
One of the two, but that isactually so.
I dealt with that very, verybadly years and years ago really
badly to the point where, like,I nearly broke my foot Cause I
(29:31):
kicked the wall so hard so Ithought I'd do a bit of research
on it.
And genuinely, that is actuallya thing.
Your body, or your brain,thinks one or the other is
actually dying and it sends anelectrical current.
And it sends an electricalcurrent.
So it's obviously your brain toyour body, because obviously
your brain controls yourelectrical currents.
But yeah, it is actually anelectric shot to your body to
make sure you're still alive.
Speaker 1 (29:50):
Really it's mad that, it's mad that, but no one ever
told you.
Speaker 2 (29:54):
No one ever prepared you.
Science with Chris.
Science with Chris.
Never thought they'd be doingscience on the podcast.
Speaker 1 (30:01):
But no one did it, did they?
And this is something that Ifeel that they should warn you
for.
When you get into later lifeand you have a business, you
have a family, you have amortgage to pay, you have bills
to pay, they're going to hauntyou 24 hours a day.
How the fuck do you deal withit?
How do you?
I know for a fact I don't wantto put you on the spot here,
(30:22):
don't want to go too deep Me anddes went balls deep every day.
Yeah, he even said that hewanted to put the balls in.
Um, how do you deal with that?
How do you have?
Okay, so let's, we've got anexample here.
You've just decided to sack inyour comfort blanket your job
that you've done for howevermany years, to focus on t shop.
(30:43):
What the fuck's been goingthrough your head for the last
couple of weeks?
Speaker 2 (30:48):
Last couple of weeks.
To be honest, it's not thefinancial side of things, it's
the responsibilities as a humanbeing that I've been struggling
with.
It's letting I've got.
I mean, there's one guy thatworks for me Henry, his name is,
I'll call him out.
He's worked for me for fiveyears.
He's a fucking legend Always ontime, always turns up, always
does what he says he's going todo.
(31:09):
Yes, he's a bit fucking slowand a bit useless.
Sorry, henry, he won't listento this anyway, but he means a
lot to me.
He does mean a lot to me andI'd like to think that I'm the
kind of person that does careabout people a little bit too
much.
And it was important for methat I didn't just say there's
(31:29):
no work for you now.
You haven't got a job, goodbye.
He's just got his own gaffe ofhis misses and everything.
So I spoke to a mate of mineyesterday and he's now going to
go and work for him.
But that was my main worry.
My main worry was thatconversation that I was going to
have with him.
It was that conversation that Iwas going to have with him.
It was the conversation I wasgoing to have with my client,
because it was a thing.
I've worked for this client for10 years and they have paid me
very well.
They paid for all of myweddings.
(31:50):
It's something that I've hadthere as a fail safe constantly
for the last 10 years.
That's been my main stress.
I went live on TikTok lastnight until 11 o'clock.
I went to bed at about midnightlast night, fell asleep about 1
o'clock.
That wasn't because I wasthinking about anything, it was
because I had all the brightlights and the cameras and
everything in my face.
I slept like a baby.
(32:12):
Yeah, you know, because it's adifferent stress and that's the
stress that's been dealing with.
Don't get me wrong in a coupleof weeks that I didn't expect to
make.
I expected to make more.
That's when I lay there thatnight going fucking hell.
So if I do that every night forthe next three weeks, how am I
(32:32):
going to pay my mortgage?
You know like so you do getdifferent stresses, but you just
the best way to deal with themis to talk to people yeah, it is
, and face them head on yeahdon't you know?
if you're in debt, let's face it.
Probably 90% of the country isin debt right now, probably even
higher than that, isn't it?
To be fair, I would have saidif you're in debt.
(32:52):
If you can't pay your debts,speak to the debt company,
because, whatever anybody thinks, these debt companies ain't out
to kill you.
No, you know, if you ring themup and can't pay your debt, they
will help you out.
I don't care what company it is, they're not there to
absolutely destroy it.
The only time you need to get abailiff on your front door is
if you've ignored the fuck outof it.
Speaker 1 (33:10):
And that's it.
Or if you think you can beatthe system, which is me
sometimes, because I think it'sun, unright, I don't fuck knows.
I think it's morally wrong whatsome of the people do, like
council tax, for example, butWell, yeah, I mean.
Speaker 2 (33:27):
I live on a private estate, mate, not post-private
estate.
Private estate is a new buildand you pay your fees to live
there and we have to pay fullcouncil tax ÂŁ240 a month I'll
pay and they don't even dealwith the streets.
Speaker 1 (33:38):
They don't fix the roads they don't bury your head
in the sand when it comes toshit like that, and a lot of my
(34:00):
problems over the years havebeen with money.
It's always been.
Everything that wakes me up atfour in the morning has been
money, yeah, money related.
And now it's changing Like nowit's like I've moved on from
money because I've dealt withthat.
Speaker 2 (34:14):
Is that only because you've lived beyond your means?
Is that why you've beenworrying?
No, it was the business thing.
Speaker 1 (34:19):
Right.
The business was living beyondits means.
The rent increased, everythingincreased, the sales dropped
everything.
And when you've got a businesswhere the overheads are probably
25, 30 grand a month andretail's dying a death and
exchange rates are going in thewrong direction and transport's
getting more expensive, it was alot.
(34:40):
So I managed to deal with thatby getting rid of that Adapt.
But now my brain.
The other morning my parentsjust moved to Spain.
Yeah, a lot.
So I managed to deal with thatby getting rid of that adapt.
But now my brain.
The other morning my parentsjust moved to Spain, yeah, and
my mum's got a dog, took the dogwith them.
I woke up fucking four o'clockin the morning wondering what
they're gonna do with the dogwhen they come back for my
brother's wedding.
(35:01):
Like what the fuck man?
Maybe just like worrying, mate,once you get wired in.
Speaker 2 (35:06):
I actually think that's a thing.
So I think once you startworrying throughout your whole
life, I think you get addictedto worrying yeah, and that's
like my old man said to me.
Speaker 1 (35:14):
He used to say to me he said never be like me when I
was a kid, I was like you'reamazing, you're a fucking legend
, you've done this.
You're a good dad, you're agood husband, you've provided
for us all the years, you're anice friend, you've done
everything you possibly can foreverybody else.
And I think what he was sayingwas don't ever be like me, don't
ever be negative, don't ever bea worrier because he used to be
(35:38):
, and that's where I get a lotof it from, I think.
But I worry about shit I don'tneed to fucking about, but not
during the day, at four o'clockin the morning, when I'm trying
to get a good night's sleep.
Speaker 2 (35:48):
When nothing's going on, isn't it Once your brain
starts talking to yourself?
That's why I've been takingashwagandha.
Oh good, yes, I've got someother stuff.
Speaker 1 (35:56):
I've been taking ashwagandha.
Speaker 2 (35:59):
But what about you?
Your?
Speaker 1 (36:00):
brain Like it goes mad.
Speaker 2 (36:02):
I know it does yeah, I'm an over thinker, massive
over thinker, mate, reallyreally bad over thinker.
I'm trying to deal with thatright now, but it's very, very
difficult when you've done doneit for pretty much your whole
life.
But it's good as well yeah,don't get me wrong, I love it as
well as hate it, like I hate itmore than I love it.
But I love it so much aboutpeople without even them
(36:23):
realising.
You know anything about themBecause you watch their body
language, you watch the way theytalk to you, you watch how much
eye contact they give you, youlisten to voice notes, you look
at text messages.
You literally everything thatgoes on.
You are analysing everythingand 99.9% of the time I'm 100%
right.
Speaker 1 (36:41):
Yeah, yeah, I've always said my superpower is
being a great judge of charactersame kind of thing being able
to judge people out not judgepeople, but if anybody's
watching this on, YouTube.
Speaker 2 (36:52):
You can see me and Ash now looking at each other in
each other's eyes, seeing if wecan actually gauge anything
from each other.
I did it at a pub earlier on.
So don't worry, I've got hiscards numbered and I did it
before I signed a contract witha cunt.
Speaker 1 (37:04):
Yeah, you did as well .
Yeah so yeah.
But on that note, chris, onebit of advice you would give to
your 25 year old self don't getmarried in your early 20s.
Speaker 2 (37:16):
What were you going to say?
Don't get married?
No, probably, just fuckingenjoy yourself.
Yeah, don't put too muchpressure on yourself.
Don't try and fall in love,don't try and have a family,
don't try and do anything otherthan just have fun.
And if I mean if that's yourfun, but it's up to you.
But yeah, 20s, 20s, just go outthere and just enjoy it.
Speaker 1 (37:37):
Enjoy it, man enjoy it travel if someone gives you
the opportunity to go and travel.
Speaker 2 (37:43):
Actually I said I don't have any regrets.
That's.
The one regret I do have,actually, is that I haven't
travelled.
I'd love to.
I still I'd love to go toThailand.
So if there's anybody watchingthat lives in Thailand and
they've got a nice five, sixbedroom villa that we could go
and do the podcast from we'd bemore than happy.
Speaker 1 (38:00):
That I've said was travel yeah, but it's in the 10
year plan to travel.
Yeah, I'll do it with my wife,my best friend, my soul mate.
Yeah, let's fucking do itanyway, chris, that's been
beautiful.
Speaker 2 (38:14):
That was a bit fucking sickening, yeah, but
it's true though, isn't?
Speaker 1 (38:17):
it.
Speaker 2 (38:17):
I love you too, darling.
Yeah, you're my best friend too.
No, she actually is.
I shouldn't laugh at that,listen they support us in doing
this.
Speaker 1 (38:25):
They support us in doing this anyway, chris.
That was blinding.
Speaker 2 (38:29):
I think we'll have to have a beer before the next one
as well, actually we'll have tohave a beer now we'll go to the
pub yeah, come on, let's go ifyou watched, thank you very much
.
Speaker 1 (38:39):
If you listened, thank you very much.
We need your support.
Like it, share it, feed it.
We're looking for sponsors, umto help us go to the next level,
and we're looking for guests.
So, if you've got, if you'vegot, if you've got an
interesting story that you wantto tell, come and sit in this
chair, because I don't knowwhere des is coming back from
(39:00):
manchester.
So come sit in this chair andtell us all about your story.
Maybe it can help someone out.
Thanks for watching.
We'll see you next week.
Cheers, guys, take care.
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