February 28, 2025 • 20 mins
*This podcast was previously shared on my other podcast Come to Find Out.*
Divorce brings about significant change and can be one of the most challenging experiences of your life. In this episode, we enlist the expertise of Ashley Garrison, a dedicated local lawyer whose insights shape how one should navigate the tumultuous waters of divorce. With warmth and wisdom, Ashley breaks down the essential steps to take when entering this difficult process, emphasizing the importance of self-education, emotional management, and financial awareness.
Are you feeling lost about your financial situation or unsure of how to prepare for your initial meeting with a divorce attorney? Ashley offers practical insights and strategic advice to put you in the driver’s seat of your journey. She stresses documenting your experiences through journaling, creating a timeline that can significantly aid in legal proceedings, while also ensuring that you're prepared for any conversations surrounding finances and property distribution.
Throughout the conversation, Ashley addresses the emotional aspects of divorce, including maintaining a healthy atmosphere for children during family transitions. She shares personal anecdotes that illuminate the importance of staying focused on living life post-divorce and understanding how best to manage the emotional weight of the situation.
Listen in as we uncover the nuances of local divorce laws and how they can vary by county. This understanding is crucial in establishing realistic expectations as you move through the legal proceedings. If you're looking for not just support but also a community, we encourage you to explore the Thrive and Decide program—an initiative aimed at helping individuals navigate through transition phases in their lives.
Join us now for profound insights and valuable tools to empower yourself on your divorce journey. Don't forget to subscribe, share, and leave a review!
to contact Ashley:
Ashley Garrison
ashley@aacolpa.com
614-565-7508
Hi and welcome to Thrive and Decide. I’m your host Sarah Thress. This podcast is intended to help women who are going through a divorce, continplating divorce or have lost a spouse feel seen, heard, understood and not alone. All the beautiful souls who share on here are coming from a place of vulnerability and a common belief that sharing your story will help others. You will also hear from industry experts on what to do and not do while going through a divorce.
Sarah Thress
614-893-5885
Sarahthressrealtor@gmail.com
Thrive and Decide Facebook
https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61559936633799
https://www.facebook.com/SarahThressRealtor/
https://www.instagram.com/sarah_thress_realtor/
Real Estate Podcast Come To Find Out:
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/come-to-find-out/id1704949604
Real Estate First Time Home Buyers course: https://sarahthress.graphy.com/
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Sarah (00:00):
Hi and welcome to this week's episode of Come to Find
Out.
This week we are speaking withAshley Garrison and she is a
local lawyer here in Dublin andI've worked with her personally
on some cases.
You know, as I've kind oftransitioned into focusing a lot
more on helping people that aregoing through a divorce and all
(00:21):
of the needs that that kind ofencompasses, as well, as you
know, creating this programcalled thrive and decide super
excited about it, and Ashley was, you know, so gracious to take
time out of her day to talk tome today and she's also been
really gracious with her timeand helping with the thrive and
decide program.
So, um, just really wanted toget her on here and, um, let her
(00:42):
kind of walk us through somesteps of you know what it looks
like when you're in the divorceprocess and you know what to
kind of expect.
So thank you so much forjoining us, ashley.
Ashley (00:53):
Thank you for having me.
Yes, I'm happy to talk aboutkind of the steps that you know
a lot of my clients go throughwhen entering kind of the
divorce realm.
So I feel like you know kind ofa lot of clients come to me not
knowing anything about theirfinancial situation and,
honestly, just kind of lostabout where to start and how to
(01:13):
put their life together.
A lot of times you know, I'vehad many clients who don't even
know what a tax return is andyou know their husband or you
know other spouse may havecontrolled all the finances.
So I would say you would saykind of, where I start is
setting up a consultation withyou.
I really like to sit down withclients and just start at the
(01:34):
very beginning how you got towhere you are and just the
knowledge that you have up tothat point, and just to kind of
get an idea of where we're at.
I think that you know so manytimes clients you know whether
they're in a position where they, their spouse, may have filed
for divorce and they have noidea what that means, or you
(01:55):
know what, what to do from that,where to go from there, or
they're in another situationwhere they've been trapped for
years and years and years andyou know, maybe they don't
control the finances and reallyjust because of that have stayed
in the marriage for so long, um.
And so I think you know,meeting with me or an attorney,
um, to know kind of, um, youknow what marital versus
(02:18):
separate property is and how, toknow, um, you know how to kind
of pick apart your finances andto know, you know, what the plan
would look like going forward,I think puts people in such a
better headspace.
Just having like a foundationand kind of a way out.
I think is really helpful tostart.
Sarah (02:39):
Yeah, no, I agree, and I think that's that's such good.
You know, like advice to giveis just, like you know, come and
ask all the questions.
You know that.
I mean, you're obviously theexpert in this.
So, uh, you know, we don't all,fortunately, we don't all get
divorced every day in and out.
(03:06):
So for you, like you get it, um, you know, and then whenever,
like once, you're like meetingwith them and you're kind of
going over stuff, like do youhave like top tips that maybe
you would give someone beforethey came to you, like you know,
make sure you have, uh, youknow this or that, like are
there certain things that youwould recommend that people have
when they come to meet with youthat first time?
Ashley (03:23):
Or it really just more of a like, hey, let's get to
know ya it's definitely likesituational, obviously, but I
feel like you know a goodexample of a client that comes
to me and is in the initial,initial steps of the divorce or
disillusion process, I would say.
And how to?
I guess sometimes I'll meetwith clients who are in the
(03:44):
initial steps and a year goes bybefore we actually kind of
pursue the matter and duringthat year I always tell clients
like there are things that youcan do to kind of put yourself
in a better position um goingforward, and so I w I would say
one of those things are take thebest notes that you can.
Um, you know, obviously you cankind of recite things that have
(04:05):
happened um to the court and tome.
But to actually have notes, um,you know a journal with
specific, specific instances,whether it be you know something
that happened with your minorchildren or something that you
know happened, you know with thefinances that you don't want to
forget.
I feel like you know havingthat journal um, I feel like
sometimes, when I'm even able toreview that journal or to have
(04:28):
you start that journal after thefirst time I met with you, it
puts you in a much betterprepared position going into the
divorce.
I feel like the next thing youknow were to be, I don't know,
as part of that journal, justrecord whether it guess, if
there's kid related issues,which is kind of, I feel like
one half it's finances and kidrelated issues when obviously it
(04:50):
comes to a divorce, are, yeah,just to take as many notes and
to just, I guess, watch thethings.
You know that you're tellingthe kids about the process that
you're going through.
I think that that's you knowjust personally.
I think we can both agree thatthat's not good for the children
, just from a personalstandpoint, but also the court
(05:11):
doesn't, you know, appreciatethat either.
So I think just knowing thatobviously what you're going
through is hard, but keepingyour kids out of it the best you
can, and kind of setting aprecedent for that throughout
that process, um paints you, Iwould say, in a much better
light.
And just to in for educateyourself.
You know, if you've neverreally, if you've never been
(05:32):
involved in the filing of yourtax returns, or you know you
don't really look at your jointbank account with your husband
or you know so many things likethat, if you don't know, you
know, find out as much as youcan going into the consult Um,
you know, because I do think youknow that is something that you
know you're going to have tobecome informed of and I think
the more, the more that you can,you know, find out and educate
(05:54):
yourself with um on the way thatfinances work and things like
that.
I think that it can really putyou at a better spot.
Sarah (06:00):
Yeah, no, I love that and I love that you made the um
comment, uh, about you knowreally keeping your kids out of
it, because I think that's thebiggest thing I know.
You know, when I was goingthrough my divorce, that was the
one thing that you know myex-husband and I really agreed
on was that that, you know,every decision we made was about
our daughter and nothing.
(06:23):
We weren't going to sit thereand bash each other to her
because that wasn't fair.
You know, like that's not fairto her.
Um, so I love that you saidthat, because you know taking
the high road is going to.
I know some people think like,oh, I've got to win the kids
over, so I've got to like bash,you know, their dad, or the dad
has to bash the mom.
That's not actually the way towin them over.
(06:43):
The way to win them over and toshow them that you care about
them is to just take the highroad and you know, just to keep
keep the court stuff between youand your you know soon to be ex
spouse and you know, just keepthe high road with the kids.
So totally agree, yeah, I lovethat.
Um, so obviously here in centralOhio you know there are
(07:08):
different rules.
You know are there differentrules like for every county?
You know I know we were kind oftalking before we got on here
that you know there might besome disclaimers or something
that you maybe wanted to- put inthere.
So I just want to make sure yougot those in, so that we cover
all your bases.
Ashley (07:28):
You got those in so that we cover all your bases.
Yes, so yes, I would say a hugedisclaimer is that every county
in Ohio is different.
They all have their own localrules and things like that, and
because of that, you know, whatI'm saying is kind of a general
rule of thumb, but every countyis different.
Every case is fact specific.
Just because you heard that youknow one of your friends got,
you know, a certain amount ofalimony or child support,
(07:49):
doesn't mean that your situation, you'll be granted the exact
same thing.
I feel like a lot of timespeople compare themselves like
you know, they'll talk tofriends or family and, you know,
come into me and say you know,but my friend got this and their
divorce and you know, eventhough I wish that's sometimes
how it worked, it is really factspecific and so I would just
(08:09):
say you know, before you take myadvice um, just to know that
you know, it obviously dependson the county you're in and to
consult with your specificattorney about you know what may
be applicable to that county.
Sarah (08:22):
Yeah, no, I love that.
Um, the other thing that Iwanted to point out that you had
mentioned, um, about the, uh,the journal, um, cause, when I
was helping my mom go through adivorce, um, she was very
emotional about it and so, um,to translate what she, what was
concerning her, into you knowsomething that was easier for
(08:44):
her attorney, I just had to, youknow, take all emotion out of
it and just put, um, you know,just facts onto paper to, you
know, give the attorney.
Is that something that yourecommend?
You know, just kind of like,take that emotion out, just do
facts, because emotion is justgoing to, you know, mess up
things.
I don't know.
(09:05):
I just wondered what your takewas on that.
Ashley (09:07):
Yeah.
So I think that you know if, ifthere it's easy for um, an
attorney to kind of pick out,you know the, the specific facts
that are, you know, compellingto the court, um, from your
journal, and so you know I wouldsay, you know, put as much as
(09:27):
you want into the journal.
A journal is better than nojournal, Obviously, if you can
stick, if you're, if you cancompartmentalize and kind of
know like, okay, these are thefacts and these are my emotions
that you know are, you know,taken as part of those facts, I
would say you know that'swhatever you can do on the piece
of paper would be great.
It's definitely something thatI'm used to on a day-to-day
(09:50):
basis, definitely to take kindof a timeline that a client
wrote or a narrative that aclient wrote and to kind of pick
apart the things that I findthe most compelling and I
explained to them.
You know.
Here's why I think that youknow, even though I think that
this situation is definitelywrong, you know, I think you
know we got to take your emotionout of that situation and just
think of, you know what doesthat mean, going forward, and
(10:12):
you know just the facts aboutwhy that situation happened and
what we can do moving forward, Iguess, is what I I feel like a
lot of attorneys can kind listenthat those are the things that
you should really do, becauseit's so therapeutic, Um, you
know, and maybe even, uh, writedown everything you know in your
(10:44):
journal and then have someone,uh, that can look at it, that
you trust, obviously, that canpull out just the facts to make
it easier.
Sarah (10:53):
You know, my thought was like, let's make your job
easier, Um, but also it allows Ithink it allows the person
that's going through it to seeokay, here's all my emotion,
here's, you know, this supersucks, but here are the facts
and here's what you know, I needto focus on, Because if you
just focus on the emotion of itwhen you're going through it,
you're going to stay in thisdark place and it's, it's just.
Ashley (11:20):
Honestly like.
That is why, I think, you know,in certain situations, legal
counsel is so helpful, becauseyou know I will say that it is
you know it is a divorce is oneof the hardest times of your
life.
(11:47):
Really easy to have blinders onand to kind of I don't know
retaliate against your spouseand to kind of make decisions
that you wouldn't otherwise makebut you're making because
you're obviously going throughthe hardest time of your life.
And so I think that you know,having an attorney who can kind
of, who is able to tell you, youknow, this is not reasonable,
we need to, you know, we need tobe reasonable.
This is, you know, it's aboutyour kids, or you know it's
obviously about, you know,finding closure and peace for
(12:08):
you.
And so I think that is alsohelpful to.
I think a lot of times it'shonestly impossible for you not,
you know, this is obviously soemotional for people and to just
be able to, I don't know, moveforward without having all those
emotions at once.
I think it's hard, and so, yeah, I do think counsel helps with
that.
Sarah (12:25):
Yeah, I love that.
So, um, I always like to findout, you know about people's uh
story.
You know, just kind of likebecause, excuse me, I think that
, uh, you know, especiallywhenever you're going through
this process and you're tryingto find, you know, an attorney,
I think it always matters tokind of know, like, who you're,
(12:47):
you know who you're looking forand who aligns with you.
Cause, just like with me, Imean being a realtor, not
everybody's going to be my cupof tea and that's okay, Like I'm
not everyone's cup of tea, Okay, no big deal, Probably the same
with you.
So, um, I would love for you tojust kind of share like a
little bit of your background.
Um, you know, like kind ofwhere you're from, what led you
to, you know, become a lawyer,what you love most about your
(13:09):
job, like just trying to helppeople get to know you as a
person so that you know they canmake a really informed decision
on, like, hey, I totally alignwith her, I'd love to work with
her.
Ashley (13:19):
Yeah for sure.
So I am from um, worthington,ohio.
I went to Worthington-KilbornHigh School, I went to college
at University of Kentucky andthen I came back to Capital for
Law School.
I actually always wanted to bea lawyer.
I don't at age six I did notunderstand why I wanted to be a
(13:45):
lawyer, but my dad was a lawyer,is a lawyer, and I just really
loved the way that it felt likehe had the answer to everyone's
questions and problems.
At that age I just feel like itwas just something that I
really looked up to.
And so I always I took, youknow, law classes in high school
even that's something I alwayswanted to do.
And then school even that'ssomething I always wanted to do.
(14:07):
And then, honestly, I also Iwould say from college wanted to
do family law.
I, before graduating or yes,before graduating from law
school, I worked at my same firmand only clerked in kind of the
family role law realm.
My actually my parents weredivorced and then my dad and
stepmother got a divorce and soI am very familiar with the
(14:28):
divorce process and kind of theI don't know kind of the
emotions that can play into itand I just I really wanted to.
You know, I feel like you knowtheir attorneys throughout the
process could have been betterabout you know, making them kind
of make decisions that weremore so in the best interest of
(14:48):
the children, and how, you know,talking with them about the
divorce and things like that canaffect the children and I, I
just think that I really, Ireally like being that person,
one to help people through.
You know I'm a fixer, a problemsolver, I love to fix people
and I do think like helping themthrough.
You know I'm a fixer, a problemsolver, I love to fix people
and I do think like helping themthrough.
You know, one of the hardesttimes of their life is like just
(15:10):
a huge I don't knowaccomplishment, I guess for me,
like each case that I get tolike.
You know, I have a client whoknows nothing about anything
like literally how to read abank statement and then just to
get them, or maybe even doesn'thave their license, and then to
get them all the way to kind offreedom and how to live on their
(15:32):
own.
It's just extremely rewardingum for me.
But yeah, I just and also um, Iguess, to be that person, that
um, you know, maybe the party'schildren can know that you know
can encourage the children to bein a better place and to be in
a situation that works for them,because I was a person that
encouraged the parties to youknow act in the best interest of
(15:54):
them, I feel like is alsoanother reason, so yeah, yeah, I
love that.
Sarah (15:58):
I love that and that is why you align so well with
Thrive and Decide.
Exactly is why you align sowell with Thrive and Decide
because you know it is thatgroup of women that are all
really passionate about helpingother women, you know, that are
going through this, creatingthat tribe to be able to know
that you know one, you're notalone.
There are others that are goingthrough this.
There are others that have gonethrough it and are now on the
(16:21):
other side, because a lot of thepeople involved in Thrive and
Decide have either been divorcedor have.
You know, like you have playeda role in a divorce and also do
it, you know, for a living.
So I love that and that's, youknow, one of the main reasons
that I was super excited to, youknow, just really align with
(16:42):
you and you know, be able tohelp people.
To, you know, just really alignwith you and you know, be able
to help people.
I also wanted to be a lawyerwhen I was little.
Yeah, and I think it wasbecause I love to argue.
My parents used to joke aboutthat and I even joked with my
husband and my daughter thatafter I got my MBA, I was like,
(17:04):
okay, now I'm gonna go back tolaw school.
And they were like like, yeah,and we're going to move out Like
there's no way.
So.
So for me, like this is sogreat that I get to, then, you
know, instead work with you knowgreat attorneys like you and
you know, feel like I'm a littlebit a part of it, but I didn't
actually, you know, have to goto law school.
Ashley (17:22):
So, yeah, and I guess if I could speak to working with
you, I feel like might be um soobviously you said that we got
to work together um kind ofrecently and I do think that,
yeah, I think you are one of themost attentive kind of realtors
um that I have worked with.
I feel like you are likeextremely communicative, always
available, you know whether itbe 11 o'clock at night, um,
(17:45):
always available to your clients, and I think that just goes a
long way, especially with thisyou know mission that you're
trying to accomplish.
Like I do think you know a lotof people um, you know similar
probably in your kind of realm,have you know?
They've never sold a house.
They have no idea how to getall.
They've lived in this house for20 years.
They have no idea how to notonly get a divorce but to start
over and to move somewhere new,and so I think it's really
(18:07):
awesome what you're doing aswell.
Sarah (18:08):
Thank you, I really appreciate that.
Yeah, that's so sweet of you.
Yeah, no problem, yeah, well,thank you so much for taking
time out of your day.
I know you are slammed, so toget on your calendar was amazing
, so I really appreciate it.
Um, yeah and uh, so I will haveall the information and the
show notes.
So if you want to um figure out, you know how to get ahold of
(18:29):
Ashley um and work with her.
You know, uh, I really couldnot um recommend her and her
firm anymore, uh, because theyare so good, yeah, yeah.
So yeah, Perfect.
Well, thank you so much fortuning in and we'll see you next
.
Hi and welcome to this week's episode of Come to Find
Out.
This week we are speaking withAshley Garrison and she is a
local lawyer here in Dublin andI've worked with her personally
on some cases.
You know, as I've kind oftransitioned into focusing a lot
more on helping people that aregoing through a divorce and all
(00:21):
of the needs that that kind ofencompasses, as well, as you
know, creating this programcalled thrive and decide super
excited about it, and Ashley was, you know, so gracious to take
time out of her day to talk tome today and she's also been
really gracious with her timeand helping with the thrive and
decide program.
So, um, just really wanted toget her on here and, um, let her
(00:42):
kind of walk us through somesteps of you know what it looks
like when you're in the divorceprocess and you know what to
kind of expect.
So thank you so much forjoining us, ashley.
Ashley (00:53):
Thank you for having me.
Yes, I'm happy to talk aboutkind of the steps that you know
a lot of my clients go throughwhen entering kind of the
divorce realm.
So I feel like you know kind ofa lot of clients come to me not
knowing anything about theirfinancial situation and,
honestly, just kind of lostabout where to start and how to
(01:13):
put their life together.
A lot of times you know, I'vehad many clients who don't even
know what a tax return is andyou know their husband or you
know other spouse may havecontrolled all the finances.
So I would say you would saykind of, where I start is
setting up a consultation withyou.
I really like to sit down withclients and just start at the
(01:34):
very beginning how you got towhere you are and just the
knowledge that you have up tothat point, and just to kind of
get an idea of where we're at.
I think that you know so manytimes clients you know whether
they're in a position where they, their spouse, may have filed
for divorce and they have noidea what that means, or you
(01:55):
know what, what to do from that,where to go from there, or
they're in another situationwhere they've been trapped for
years and years and years andyou know, maybe they don't
control the finances and reallyjust because of that have stayed
in the marriage for so long, um.
And so I think you know,meeting with me or an attorney,
um, to know kind of, um, youknow what marital versus
(02:18):
separate property is and how, toknow, um, you know how to kind
of pick apart your finances andto know, you know, what the plan
would look like going forward,I think puts people in such a
better headspace.
Just having like a foundationand kind of a way out.
I think is really helpful tostart.
Sarah (02:39):
Yeah, no, I agree, and I think that's that's such good.
You know, like advice to giveis just, like you know, come and
ask all the questions.
You know that.
I mean, you're obviously theexpert in this.
So, uh, you know, we don't all,fortunately, we don't all get
divorced every day in and out.
(03:06):
So for you, like you get it, um, you know, and then whenever,
like once, you're like meetingwith them and you're kind of
going over stuff, like do youhave like top tips that maybe
you would give someone beforethey came to you, like you know,
make sure you have, uh, youknow this or that, like are
there certain things that youwould recommend that people have
when they come to meet with youthat first time?
Ashley (03:23):
Or it really just more of a like, hey, let's get to
know ya it's definitely likesituational, obviously, but I
feel like you know a goodexample of a client that comes
to me and is in the initial,initial steps of the divorce or
disillusion process, I would say.
And how to?
I guess sometimes I'll meetwith clients who are in the
(03:44):
initial steps and a year goes bybefore we actually kind of
pursue the matter and duringthat year I always tell clients
like there are things that youcan do to kind of put yourself
in a better position um goingforward, and so I w I would say
one of those things are take thebest notes that you can.
Um, you know, obviously you cankind of recite things that have
(04:05):
happened um to the court and tome.
But to actually have notes, um,you know a journal with
specific, specific instances,whether it be you know something
that happened with your minorchildren or something that you
know happened, you know with thefinances that you don't want to
forget.
I feel like you know havingthat journal um, I feel like
sometimes, when I'm even able toreview that journal or to have
(04:28):
you start that journal after thefirst time I met with you, it
puts you in a much betterprepared position going into the
divorce.
I feel like the next thing youknow were to be, I don't know,
as part of that journal, justrecord whether it guess, if
there's kid related issues,which is kind of, I feel like
one half it's finances and kidrelated issues when obviously it
(04:50):
comes to a divorce, are, yeah,just to take as many notes and
to just, I guess, watch thethings.
You know that you're tellingthe kids about the process that
you're going through.
I think that that's you knowjust personally.
I think we can both agree thatthat's not good for the children
, just from a personalstandpoint, but also the court
(05:11):
doesn't, you know, appreciatethat either.
So I think just knowing thatobviously what you're going
through is hard, but keepingyour kids out of it the best you
can, and kind of setting aprecedent for that throughout
that process, um paints you, Iwould say, in a much better
light.
And just to in for educateyourself.
You know, if you've neverreally, if you've never been
(05:32):
involved in the filing of yourtax returns, or you know you
don't really look at your jointbank account with your husband
or you know so many things likethat, if you don't know, you
know, find out as much as youcan going into the consult Um,
you know, because I do think youknow that is something that you
know you're going to have tobecome informed of and I think
the more, the more that you can,you know, find out and educate
(05:54):
yourself with um on the way thatfinances work and things like
that.
I think that it can really putyou at a better spot.
Sarah (06:00):
Yeah, no, I love that and I love that you made the um
comment, uh, about you knowreally keeping your kids out of
it, because I think that's thebiggest thing I know.
You know, when I was goingthrough my divorce, that was the
one thing that you know myex-husband and I really agreed
on was that that, you know,every decision we made was about
our daughter and nothing.
(06:23):
We weren't going to sit thereand bash each other to her
because that wasn't fair.
You know, like that's not fairto her.
Um, so I love that you saidthat, because you know taking
the high road is going to.
I know some people think like,oh, I've got to win the kids
over, so I've got to like bash,you know, their dad, or the dad
has to bash the mom.
That's not actually the way towin them over.
(06:43):
The way to win them over and toshow them that you care about
them is to just take the highroad and you know, just to keep
keep the court stuff between youand your you know soon to be ex
spouse and you know, just keepthe high road with the kids.
So totally agree, yeah, I lovethat.
Um, so obviously here in centralOhio you know there are
(07:08):
different rules.
You know are there differentrules like for every county?
You know I know we were kind oftalking before we got on here
that you know there might besome disclaimers or something
that you maybe wanted to- put inthere.
So I just want to make sure yougot those in, so that we cover
all your bases.
Ashley (07:28):
You got those in so that we cover all your bases.
Yes, so yes, I would say a hugedisclaimer is that every county
in Ohio is different.
They all have their own localrules and things like that, and
because of that, you know, whatI'm saying is kind of a general
rule of thumb, but every countyis different.
Every case is fact specific.
Just because you heard that youknow one of your friends got,
you know, a certain amount ofalimony or child support,
(07:49):
doesn't mean that your situation, you'll be granted the exact
same thing.
I feel like a lot of timespeople compare themselves like
you know, they'll talk tofriends or family and, you know,
come into me and say you know,but my friend got this and their
divorce and you know, eventhough I wish that's sometimes
how it worked, it is really factspecific and so I would just
(08:09):
say you know, before you take myadvice um, just to know that
you know, it obviously dependson the county you're in and to
consult with your specificattorney about you know what may
be applicable to that county.
Sarah (08:22):
Yeah, no, I love that.
Um, the other thing that Iwanted to point out that you had
mentioned, um, about the, uh,the journal, um, cause, when I
was helping my mom go through adivorce, um, she was very
emotional about it and so, um,to translate what she, what was
concerning her, into you knowsomething that was easier for
(08:44):
her attorney, I just had to, youknow, take all emotion out of
it and just put, um, you know,just facts onto paper to, you
know, give the attorney.
Is that something that yourecommend?
You know, just kind of like,take that emotion out, just do
facts, because emotion is justgoing to, you know, mess up
things.
I don't know.
(09:05):
I just wondered what your takewas on that.
Ashley (09:07):
Yeah.
So I think that you know if, ifthere it's easy for um, an
attorney to kind of pick out,you know the, the specific facts
that are, you know, compellingto the court, um, from your
journal, and so you know I wouldsay, you know, put as much as
(09:27):
you want into the journal.
A journal is better than nojournal, Obviously, if you can
stick, if you're, if you cancompartmentalize and kind of
know like, okay, these are thefacts and these are my emotions
that you know are, you know,taken as part of those facts, I
would say you know that'swhatever you can do on the piece
of paper would be great.
It's definitely something thatI'm used to on a day-to-day
(09:50):
basis, definitely to take kindof a timeline that a client
wrote or a narrative that aclient wrote and to kind of pick
apart the things that I findthe most compelling and I
explained to them.
You know.
Here's why I think that youknow, even though I think that
this situation is definitelywrong, you know, I think you
know we got to take your emotionout of that situation and just
think of, you know what doesthat mean, going forward, and
(10:12):
you know just the facts aboutwhy that situation happened and
what we can do moving forward, Iguess, is what I I feel like a
lot of attorneys can kind listenthat those are the things that
you should really do, becauseit's so therapeutic, Um, you
know, and maybe even, uh, writedown everything you know in your
(10:44):
journal and then have someone,uh, that can look at it, that
you trust, obviously, that canpull out just the facts to make
it easier.
Sarah (10:53):
You know, my thought was like, let's make your job
easier, Um, but also it allows Ithink it allows the person
that's going through it to seeokay, here's all my emotion,
here's, you know, this supersucks, but here are the facts
and here's what you know, I needto focus on, Because if you
just focus on the emotion of itwhen you're going through it,
you're going to stay in thisdark place and it's, it's just.
Ashley (11:20):
Honestly like.
That is why, I think, you know,in certain situations, legal
counsel is so helpful, becauseyou know I will say that it is
you know it is a divorce is oneof the hardest times of your
life.
(11:47):
Really easy to have blinders onand to kind of I don't know
retaliate against your spouseand to kind of make decisions
that you wouldn't otherwise makebut you're making because
you're obviously going throughthe hardest time of your life.
And so I think that you know,having an attorney who can kind
of, who is able to tell you, youknow, this is not reasonable,
we need to, you know, we need tobe reasonable.
This is, you know, it's aboutyour kids, or you know it's
obviously about, you know,finding closure and peace for
(12:08):
you.
And so I think that is alsohelpful to.
I think a lot of times it'shonestly impossible for you not,
you know, this is obviously soemotional for people and to just
be able to, I don't know, moveforward without having all those
emotions at once.
I think it's hard, and so, yeah, I do think counsel helps with
that.
Sarah (12:25):
Yeah, I love that.
So, um, I always like to findout, you know about people's uh
story.
You know, just kind of likebecause, excuse me, I think that
, uh, you know, especiallywhenever you're going through
this process and you're tryingto find, you know, an attorney,
I think it always matters tokind of know, like, who you're,
(12:47):
you know who you're looking forand who aligns with you.
Cause, just like with me, Imean being a realtor, not
everybody's going to be my cupof tea and that's okay, Like I'm
not everyone's cup of tea, Okay, no big deal, Probably the same
with you.
So, um, I would love for you tojust kind of share like a
little bit of your background.
Um, you know, like kind ofwhere you're from, what led you
to, you know, become a lawyer,what you love most about your
(13:09):
job, like just trying to helppeople get to know you as a
person so that you know they canmake a really informed decision
on, like, hey, I totally alignwith her, I'd love to work with
her.
Ashley (13:19):
Yeah for sure.
So I am from um, worthington,ohio.
I went to Worthington-KilbornHigh School, I went to college
at University of Kentucky andthen I came back to Capital for
Law School.
I actually always wanted to bea lawyer.
I don't at age six I did notunderstand why I wanted to be a
(13:45):
lawyer, but my dad was a lawyer,is a lawyer, and I just really
loved the way that it felt likehe had the answer to everyone's
questions and problems.
At that age I just feel like itwas just something that I
really looked up to.
And so I always I took, youknow, law classes in high school
even that's something I alwayswanted to do.
And then school even that'ssomething I always wanted to do.
(14:07):
And then, honestly, I also Iwould say from college wanted to
do family law.
I, before graduating or yes,before graduating from law
school, I worked at my same firmand only clerked in kind of the
family role law realm.
My actually my parents weredivorced and then my dad and
stepmother got a divorce and soI am very familiar with the
(14:28):
divorce process and kind of theI don't know kind of the
emotions that can play into itand I just I really wanted to.
You know, I feel like you knowtheir attorneys throughout the
process could have been betterabout you know, making them kind
of make decisions that weremore so in the best interest of
(14:48):
the children, and how, you know,talking with them about the
divorce and things like that canaffect the children and I, I
just think that I really, Ireally like being that person,
one to help people through.
You know I'm a fixer, a problemsolver, I love to fix people
and I do think like helping themthrough.
You know I'm a fixer, a problemsolver, I love to fix people
and I do think like helping themthrough.
You know, one of the hardesttimes of their life is like just
(15:10):
a huge I don't knowaccomplishment, I guess for me,
like each case that I get tolike.
You know, I have a client whoknows nothing about anything
like literally how to read abank statement and then just to
get them, or maybe even doesn'thave their license, and then to
get them all the way to kind offreedom and how to live on their
(15:32):
own.
It's just extremely rewardingum for me.
But yeah, I just and also um, Iguess, to be that person, that
um, you know, maybe the party'schildren can know that you know
can encourage the children to bein a better place and to be in
a situation that works for them,because I was a person that
encouraged the parties to youknow act in the best interest of
(15:54):
them, I feel like is alsoanother reason, so yeah, yeah, I
love that.
Sarah (15:58):
I love that and that is why you align so well with
Thrive and Decide.
Exactly is why you align sowell with Thrive and Decide
because you know it is thatgroup of women that are all
really passionate about helpingother women, you know, that are
going through this, creatingthat tribe to be able to know
that you know one, you're notalone.
There are others that are goingthrough this.
There are others that have gonethrough it and are now on the
(16:21):
other side, because a lot of thepeople involved in Thrive and
Decide have either been divorcedor have.
You know, like you have playeda role in a divorce and also do
it, you know, for a living.
So I love that and that's, youknow, one of the main reasons
that I was super excited to, youknow, just really align with
(16:42):
you and you know, be able tohelp people.
To, you know, just really alignwith you and you know, be able
to help people.
I also wanted to be a lawyerwhen I was little.
Yeah, and I think it wasbecause I love to argue.
My parents used to joke aboutthat and I even joked with my
husband and my daughter thatafter I got my MBA, I was like,
(17:04):
okay, now I'm gonna go back tolaw school.
And they were like like, yeah,and we're going to move out Like
there's no way.
So.
So for me, like this is sogreat that I get to, then, you
know, instead work with you knowgreat attorneys like you and
you know, feel like I'm a littlebit a part of it, but I didn't
actually, you know, have to goto law school.
Ashley (17:22):
So, yeah, and I guess if I could speak to working with
you, I feel like might be um soobviously you said that we got
to work together um kind ofrecently and I do think that,
yeah, I think you are one of themost attentive kind of realtors
um that I have worked with.
I feel like you are likeextremely communicative, always
available, you know whether itbe 11 o'clock at night, um,
(17:45):
always available to your clients, and I think that just goes a
long way, especially with thisyou know mission that you're
trying to accomplish.
Like I do think you know a lotof people um, you know similar
probably in your kind of realm,have you know?
They've never sold a house.
They have no idea how to getall.
They've lived in this house for20 years.
They have no idea how to notonly get a divorce but to start
over and to move somewhere new,and so I think it's really
(18:07):
awesome what you're doing aswell.
Sarah (18:08):
Thank you, I really appreciate that.
Yeah, that's so sweet of you.
Yeah, no problem, yeah, well,thank you so much for taking
time out of your day.
I know you are slammed, so toget on your calendar was amazing
, so I really appreciate it.
Um, yeah and uh, so I will haveall the information and the
show notes.
So if you want to um figure out, you know how to get ahold of
(18:29):
Ashley um and work with her.
You know, uh, I really couldnot um recommend her and her
firm anymore, uh, because theyare so good, yeah, yeah.
So yeah, Perfect.
Well, thank you so much fortuning in and we'll see you next
.
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