September 3, 2024 • 22 mins
Ever faced the unpredictable twists and turns of international travel? Join me as I take you through a rollercoaster of emotions all in one adventure in this episode of Tray Tables and Time Zones. Returning home from trekking in the mountains of Nepal, I ended up facing the most challenging ordeal of my travel life: severe food poisoning while onboard multiple flights and a during a layover. I describe how quickly a nice, easy trip home turned into a cold sweat hell, with panic induced sprints to the bathroom, leg-numbing lavatory sessions and dehydration delirium. Trust me, its one hell of a story!
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Episode Transcript
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Intro (00:00):
This is your captain speaking.
If you love travel and we knowyou do buckle your seatbelts and
keep your tray tables in theupright position.
You should be seeing theilluminated fun signs throughout
the aircraft because we'reabout to take off on a chat of
epic proportions.
Welcome to Tray Tables and TimeZones, the podcast where travel
(00:24):
isn't just about takingvacations, it's about enriching
your life.
We'll dive into the highs, thelows and the downright absurd
moments that come with exploringthe world.
Whether it's food poisoning ona long haul flight, trekking to
Mount Everest base camp ortraveling to Disney parks
worldwide, we cover it allSerious at moments, but mostly
(00:46):
we're here to laugh and sharesome brutally honest travel
stories.
So let's do it one time zone ata time.
This is Trey Tables and TimeZones, and this is your host,
osh Bogle.
Josh (01:04):
Hey everyone, thanks for checking out the podcast and I
hope you enjoy this episode ofTrey Tables and Time Zones.
So if you travel for any periodof time, internationally
especially, you've heard thestories and, hell, maybe you've
even experienced the nightmarethat is either food poisoning or
(01:26):
traveler's diarrhea.
I mean, they kind of go hand inhand.
The same thing's happening.
I'm not a doctor, so I'm surethere's some differences between
the two.
But let's just lump them allinto one and say you know, food
poisoning, traveler's diarrhea,I don't care, they're known by.
You know really colorfuldescriptive phrases.
You know, you'll hear DelhiBelly, you'll hear Montezuma's
(01:48):
Revenge, I've heard the MiddleEast Mudslide they're all pretty
dead on.
Basically, it's something thatoccurs when you fly too close to
the sun and you take some riskswith some food or some water,
especially when you're travelinginternationally.
It'll get you.
You know.
And look, I am a person wholoves to eat wild food.
(02:10):
I mean, I'm an adventurouseater.
One of my favorite things inthe world is the Southeast Asia
point and pray.
You walk up to a case, you'rebasically looking at a bunch of
things that look pretty good.
You know, you point at one ofthem because, hell, you really
don't know what kind of meatthat is, and you probably don't
want to know, but it looks damngood.
You're hungry and so what theheck you know, and so you try it
, hoping that it will be tasty.
(02:32):
And that it won't you know, putyou in the toilet later.
So, having traveled the betterpart of eight to 10 years
internationally on a prettyconsistent basis, I have been
extremely lucky that I have notrun into this affliction.
I don't know how I've been tosome somewhat dodgy places and
(02:53):
eaten some pretty dodgy food.
At times I try to be realcareful with the water and ice
and drinks and things like that,but on the food side, probably
not as careful as I should be,but for some reason I've been
able to avoid it until earlierthis year.
And this, my friends, is thestory about how I experienced
(03:16):
quite possibly no, not quitepossibly, it absolutely, it
absolutely is the worst two daysof travel in my entire life.
I mean living hell.
So the story starts in Nepal.
I was in Nepal because I hadmade an attempt on summiting
(03:37):
Mera Peak.
If you don't know Mera Peak,it's a 22,000 foot peak in the
Himalaya, very near MountEverest, and if you've done, you
know the Mount Everest basecamp trek, which I've been lucky
enough to do.
You fly into the same place,but it's a different route.
Right, you have to go to adifferent side.
(04:04):
The next morning flew up toLukla.
They're all in Nepal and hadbeen trekking through the
mountains.
You know sleeping at tea houses,eating breakfast, lunch and
dinner in tea houses, and youknow tea houses, while remote,
are generally pretty decent, thefood is pretty good they have.
(04:24):
You know you still get bottlesof water and fresh water or you
can use the water on themountain and then you know
purify it and run it throughfilters and such and you can
drink it.
So if I ever did that, I wouldpurify it and I had tablets to
purify it and never had anyissues.
I mean, you get upset, stomachand such on the mountain, but
(04:44):
that's because you know thefood's a little different.
You're stressed, you're at highaltitude, there's a lot of
things going on.
So anyway, trekking up themountain toward Mera Peak and
everything was great, we got upto the mountain, got up pretty
high and was looking at going tobase camp to make an attempt on
summoning the peak and ended upgetting three days of
(05:09):
continuous snow, I mean whiteout snow.
So because of limitations ontime and time off and things
like that, I couldn't just situp there and wait for the
weather to clear Because,frankly, I had to get back.
I had, you know, I have a job,and so there was.
There was no way to extendbeyond what I had already
(05:31):
planned for, so made our wayback down, ended up being
stranded because of justunrelenting rain and fog and,
since Lukla is a visual onlyapproach airport if it's foggy,
the weather's bad, the planesaren't coming in and they didn't
come in, and so I had to sit ina tea house for a couple of
(05:54):
extra days in Lukla waiting fora flight out, and ended up
watching a bunch of old WWEwrestling.
It wasn't recent stuff and Idon't know what satellite they
were pulling it off of, but sureas shit.
In the middle of the Himalaya inNepal, myself, two Brits and a
tea house full of otherforeigners and guides and
(06:16):
porters and everything else aresitting there in the middle of
the day, all trying to get backto Kathmandu and have nothing to
do but watch wrestling reruns.
I mean, hey, you do what yougot to do to wait the timeout.
So anyway, it was actually apretty cool experience.
I was really disappointed notsummiting Mera Peak, but we'll
talk about that more on anothershow At that point.
(06:36):
Still perfectly fine, noproblems, feeling good.
Disappointed, but you know,physically felt fine.
So I ended up flying from Luklato a remote airport, not in
Kathmandu, because they werelimiting flights flying into
Kathmandu.
The flights out of Lukla werebacked up and so I ended up
having to fly to a very smallairport out in the middle of
(07:00):
nowhere, basically.
And then a group of us kind ofjoined together and arranged for
a van to drive us from thatairport back to Kathmandu.
That in and of itself was awild experience.
Not only were we packed intothis van with all of our gear
and a bunch of guys that hadbeen, you know, hiking and
(07:23):
trekking and mountain climbingfor the last you know couple of
weeks and hadn't really had abunch of guys that had been, you
know, hiking and trekking andmountain climbing for the last
you know couple of weeks andhadn't really had a bunch of
showers and, you know, certainlyneeded them.
It was an interesting ride, tosay the least.
Plus, we're going over mountainpasses, one lane roads.
I mean it's like NationalGeographic taking place right
there in front of your eyes,these buses and trucks on the
(07:44):
side of these little mountainroads, and it was wild.
And to top it all off, the daythat we were driving back into
Kathmandu was also holy for theHindu religion.
So there was people everywhereand there was all these little
towns and, of course,everybody's covered in color,
these colored powders and stuffAgain, very cool to see.
(08:06):
Loved getting the opportunityto see that, because it was.
I mean, it was really cool.
But I was so ready to get out ofthat damn van and off of that
road that at that point I didn'treally appreciate just how cool
it was.
So got dropped off in themiddle of Kathmandu.
The company that was handlingthe God service for me came and
got me, took me back to thehotel and the plan was to fly
(08:29):
out the next day.
So I got to the hotel, fine,kind of repacked my bags to get
ready to go home, drug out myclean clothes that I had stored
at the hotel, you know, took ashower, put on some new clothes
and figured out that I wanted togo get something to eat.
I hadn't had any meat in liketwo weeks because you don't eat
(08:49):
the meat on the mountain becauseit's been carried up there on
somebody's back and notrefrigerated and certainly my
American stomach would not havedone well with the meat.
So I was hungry for some typeof protein and I really didn't
care what kind it was.
So I started looking around onGoogle and turns out very close
(09:09):
to my hotel is a Japaneserestaurant.
Got really good reviews.
I'm like, hey, you know I loveJapanese food, let's do this.
So I Go to the Japaneserestaurant, have some karaage,
some yakitori, a couple of AsahiSuper Drys, anyway, ate a lot
of chicken.
Enjoyed it, had a good meal,went back to the hotel, took
(09:30):
another shower and got ready toleave the next morning had a
really early flight, got up thenext morning, had a ride waiting
for me to take me to the hotelor hotel to the airport.
I was flying Qatar Airways on a787 from Kathmandu to Doha and
then I was flying Qatar againfrom Doha to London.
(09:52):
And the thought there was isthere was some.
I had some points that I coulduse on United and so why not fly
up to London and then fly homein business class on United.
So flipped to London.
The plan was to take a day inLondon do some shopping for my
wife.
There's a fabric company that'sheadquartered in London that
she loves because she quilts,and so I was going to swing by
(10:15):
there, pick up some fabric thatshe can't get in the US and haul
it home with me, and you knowthat way have a little bit of a
break on the flight home.
Great plan, really excited.
Love London.
It's going to be great to getback.
Plus, I have another layover inDoha.
So great, get on the plane.
Everything's going fine, sittingin economy class on the on the
aisle, so I've got room tostretch out and everything.
(10:36):
They bring around somebreakfast.
So I eat and I settle in towatch a movie to pass the rest
of the time on the flight.
So I eat and I settle in towatch a movie to pass the rest
of the time on the flight.
I think the flight was aboutfive hours.
So I'm sitting there and I'mwatching I don't know what movie
, some movie, and all of asudden my stomach started
hurting really bad.
It started cramping up and Iwas like, ah, I might have to go
to the bathroom.
(10:56):
Yeah, no problem, I've been onenough flights.
You know my, my reserve of ofgoing to the restroom and having
to handle business has longsince disappeared.
And I don't care at this point.
I'll you know if I got to go, Igot to go, so whatever.
So I get up, go to the bathroomyou know, sitting there, feel a
little off, but not horrible,and use the restroom, kind of
(11:19):
feel better.
So get back up, head back to myseat, sit back down Drinking
some water, just hanging out andlike a ton of fucking bricks,
something just washes over me,just like, hits me, cold sweats,
stomach and knots, and I'm justlike, oh shit, I jump up out of
(11:43):
my seat and I am in a fuckingdead sprint to the bathroom.
Now, I haven't looked up to seeif there's any poor souls in
the bathroom, but if there was,I was going to beat the hell out
of the door until they got out.
Luckily for me I mean thinkyou're lucky stars on this one
One of the bathrooms was vacant,so I tear open the door, jump
(12:06):
in there, lock it, sit down andit's just.
I mean, it's a nightmare, it'sjust the worst of the worst.
I am in the middle of some verybad number two action and I
start getting nauseated and it's, you know, coming off the top
(12:26):
and the bottom at this point.
And here I am in a God forsakenairplane bathroom and I can't
go anywhere and I can't stopwhat's happening and I am just
panicked.
I don't know what the hell I'mgoing to do.
Well, I try to go back to myseat eventually, but quickly the
same exact thing happens.
(12:47):
I mean, I get sat down for twoseconds, I'm back in the
bathroom.
So basically, I figure out I'mriding this flight out in the
bathroom.
It's probably the best placefor me because, you know, if I
have to get up and try to makeit back to the bathroom and
there's somebody in there withhow I was feeling, it was going
(13:07):
to be bad for everyone.
I mean everyone.
I was going to take people downwith me, so better for me to
just lock myself in the bathroomand hope that it'll pass.
Well, it didn't pass, and hopethat it'll pass.
Well, it didn't pass.
(13:31):
When we finally arrived in Doha,I had dragged my ass out of the
bathroom, back to my seat andthe poor people sitting next to
me I mean my God, they must havelooked at me and thought I was
a ghost, because I know I had tobe.
You know, just pale eyes orbloodshot.
I mean I had to look, you know,just pale eyes or bloodshot.
I mean I I had to look likeutter shit, like I had just been
through hell, because I hadanyway, I had basically
(13:54):
evacuated any type of liquids oranything else in my body at
that point, and so I didn't havea whole lot to give.
So I sucked it up and got in myseat for the landing, got
landed, got out of the planeinto Doha airport and walked 50
feet and had to dead sprint tothe bathroom again, and this was
(14:16):
my life for the next four hours.
I was in just utter misery, tothe point to where I was
seriously wondering if I waseven going to be able to get on
the next flight, because theflight from Doha to London was
seven hours and I'm just likewhat am I going to do?
You're dehydrated, you feellike hell, you've been in the
(14:38):
bathroom for hours on end and atthat point anything sounds good
Hell.
You would take anything to makeit stop Right.
And you're also irrational inthat.
You know I couldn't come upwith a logical thing to do.
I think I even had some nauseamedicine with me, completely
forgot about it, didn't know itexisted.
(14:59):
I mean, I was so tunnelvisioned that I couldn't do
anything but either sit in achair or sit on the toilet.
Anyway, fought through you knowthe back and forth in Doha, get
on the plane to London.
I just said, screw it, I wantto get somewhere.
Because I knew that if I couldjust get to London I could get
to a hotel.
I had hotel reservations fortwo nights and it was at
(15:24):
Heathrow, so I wouldn't have togo very far.
And I was like, if I can justget there, I'll be okay, because
I figured if nothing else, Icould hole up in that room and
ride out the misery, right.
So I get on the plane to Londonand look, I'll tell you right
now Qatar Airways.
I already had pretty highthoughts on them.
(15:45):
I thought they were pretty damngood.
I mean, I know most people do.
They're always ranked reallyhigh.
And let me just say the cabincrew on that flight, especially
one flight attendant, she was anangel.
I mean I wish I could rememberher name.
But hell, I don't remember muchabout that trip, except you
know, the inside of a bathroom.
But I wish I could remember hername because I would have
(16:07):
emailed Qatar Airways and beenlike this woman is a saint.
I mean, as soon as I walked onthe plane, she must have spotted
my pale ghost nature and beenlike there's something wrong
with this jackass.
And she probably came up totalk to me to make sure that I
wasn't like a whack job orsomething.
And anyway, she came over andasked me, you know if I was okay
and you know what was going on.
(16:28):
And I told her because at thatpoint I just didn't give a shit.
Honestly, I didn't care if sheknew, great, if she didn't,
whatever, just get me to London,I don't give a damn what
happens.
And so that's what I did.
I, you know, I told her thewhole situation and I mean she
was an angel.
She brought me bottles of water,made sure I had, you know, a
(16:49):
cold towel.
You know she was trying to seeif there was anything that they
had on the plane that I might beable to keep down.
You know she brought me somefruit and whatever other bland
things she could find.
You know I ended up not eatinga damn bit of it because the
thought of of putting anythingin my mouth at that point was so
disgusting and so horrifyingthat I just couldn't do it.
(17:09):
It was all I could do to drinkwater just to keep my mouth
somewhat, you know, wet and fromturning into like sand and dust
because I was so dehydrated atthat point.
Anyway, that flight went prettymuch as you can imagine.
I spent most of it in thebathroom in a very bad way, and
(17:29):
when I didn't, I spent the restof the time kind of leaning up
against the wall of the planebecause at least it was kind of
cool and it felt good on my head.
That's all I could reallymanage.
Didn't eat anything, only dranksome water.
That was it.
Got to London.
It was Terminal 4 at Heathrow,or Terminal 5.
It had been Terminal 5.
Anyway, whatever terminal Qatarcomes in, it's not a great
(17:52):
terminal.
At Heathrow I mean, I've flownin and out of the Queens
Terminal it's great Terminal 2.
This terminal, it was awarehouse right.
The luggage was in the verybottom of it.
I had to go all the waydownstairs to get these two
giant duffel bags I had with me,because it's all my climbing
gear, all my cold weather gear,and so they weigh a ton, and I'm
(18:14):
just, I don't have the strengthto do anything.
I dragged these damn bagsupstairs somehow to the taxi
line because my hotel isattached to the Queens Terminal,
so it's attached to Terminal 2.
And there was no way I wasgetting on the train at that
point.
I mean I couldn't, I barelycould tell you my name.
So gotten the black cab verynice cabbie which, by the way,
(18:37):
real quick side note here youknow most people will tell you
oh, don't take black cabs, aretoo expensive and they are
pricey.
Don't get me wrong, but I havenever run into a bad black cab
driver.
They have always been extremelynice and wanted to chat and
it's been an enjoyable rideevery time.
And this was late at night thistime and this guy was still
(19:00):
chatty and friendly.
So yeah, it may be a coupleextra dollars, but it's fucking
worth it in London, I meanfrankly, it really is, it's just
great.
Anyway, back to my story.
Make it to the hotel, getchecked in.
Don't really have to talk toanybody, thank God, cause they
would have probably thought Iwas bringing in the plague to
the hotel.
Made it into the room, passedout, woke up sometime the next
(19:24):
day, finally, having somewhatregained some semblance of
dignity in my life, I wasfeeling a little bit better,
ended up making it into the cityfor a little while to get my
wife's fabric, which was nice.
It got me out, it got me to doa few things, came back to the
hotel, slept, got up later, wentto the actually to the hotel
(19:48):
restaurant, had a little bit ofchicken which what a ballsy move
on my part, because I'm prettysure the chicken I had in
Kathmandu was what did me in butanyway, I figured it was bland
enough.
I had some chicken and thenwent back to sleep.
Got up the next morning,figured it was bland enough, I
had some chicken and then wentback to sleep.
Got up the next morning, flewhome.
Felt like absolute shit thewhole time flying home, but it
had subsided at that point towhere I wasn't in the bathroom
(20:09):
the entire time and thank God Iwas in Polaris on United, so at
least I had a lie, flat bed, wasable to get some sleep and
relax.
Didn't really eat.
But I'm just telling you rightnow, man, if there's ever
something that you want to avoidwhile traveling, it's food
poisoning.
But if you're going to get it,if you're going to do something
stupid, eat something risky,drink something risky, whatever
(20:33):
you make damn sure that when youdo that, you are somewhere
where you're going to be for acouple of days, because I can
tell you what, my friends, youdo not ever and I mean ever want
to experience the Nepalnightmare like I did Stuck
inside a speeding tube at 500miles an hour, 40,000 feet in
(20:58):
the air and you've got nowhereto go.
It is an absolute nightmare.
Trust me, I've lived it.
I know this has been kind of aninteresting episode, but hey,
this is what we do on thispodcast, right, we talk about
real travel.
It's not always rainbows andsunshine.
Sometimes it all happens in thetoilet.
Intro (21:19):
This has been Trade Tables and Time Zones.
Worldwide travel is one of thefunnest things you can do in
life and it's our passion totalk about the good, the bad,
the funny and the ugly.
Nothing is off limits.
We hope you've enjoyed the show.
If you did, make sure to like,rate and review.
(21:40):
We'll be back soon, but in themeantime, find us on Instagram
at Trade Tables and Time Zones,and for questions or comments,
send your email totradesandtimes at gmailcom.
Take care and see you next timeon Trade Tables and Time Zones.
This is your captain speaking.
If you love travel and we knowyou do buckle your seatbelts and
keep your tray tables in theupright position.
You should be seeing theilluminated fun signs throughout
the aircraft because we'reabout to take off on a chat of
epic proportions.
Welcome to Tray Tables and TimeZones, the podcast where travel
(00:24):
isn't just about takingvacations, it's about enriching
your life.
We'll dive into the highs, thelows and the downright absurd
moments that come with exploringthe world.
Whether it's food poisoning ona long haul flight, trekking to
Mount Everest base camp ortraveling to Disney parks
worldwide, we cover it allSerious at moments, but mostly
(00:46):
we're here to laugh and sharesome brutally honest travel
stories.
So let's do it one time zone ata time.
This is Trey Tables and TimeZones, and this is your host,
osh Bogle.
Josh (01:04):
Hey everyone, thanks for checking out the podcast and I
hope you enjoy this episode ofTrey Tables and Time Zones.
So if you travel for any periodof time, internationally
especially, you've heard thestories and, hell, maybe you've
even experienced the nightmarethat is either food poisoning or
(01:26):
traveler's diarrhea.
I mean, they kind of go hand inhand.
The same thing's happening.
I'm not a doctor, so I'm surethere's some differences between
the two.
But let's just lump them allinto one and say you know, food
poisoning, traveler's diarrhea,I don't care, they're known by.
You know really colorfuldescriptive phrases.
You know, you'll hear DelhiBelly, you'll hear Montezuma's
(01:48):
Revenge, I've heard the MiddleEast Mudslide they're all pretty
dead on.
Basically, it's something thatoccurs when you fly too close to
the sun and you take some riskswith some food or some water,
especially when you're travelinginternationally.
It'll get you.
You know.
And look, I am a person wholoves to eat wild food.
(02:10):
I mean, I'm an adventurouseater.
One of my favorite things inthe world is the Southeast Asia
point and pray.
You walk up to a case, you'rebasically looking at a bunch of
things that look pretty good.
You know, you point at one ofthem because, hell, you really
don't know what kind of meatthat is, and you probably don't
want to know, but it looks damngood.
You're hungry and so what theheck you know, and so you try it
, hoping that it will be tasty.
(02:32):
And that it won't you know, putyou in the toilet later.
So, having traveled the betterpart of eight to 10 years
internationally on a prettyconsistent basis, I have been
extremely lucky that I have notrun into this affliction.
I don't know how I've been tosome somewhat dodgy places and
(02:53):
eaten some pretty dodgy food.
At times I try to be realcareful with the water and ice
and drinks and things like that,but on the food side, probably
not as careful as I should be,but for some reason I've been
able to avoid it until earlierthis year.
And this, my friends, is thestory about how I experienced
(03:16):
quite possibly no, not quitepossibly, it absolutely, it
absolutely is the worst two daysof travel in my entire life.
I mean living hell.
So the story starts in Nepal.
I was in Nepal because I hadmade an attempt on summiting
(03:37):
Mera Peak.
If you don't know Mera Peak,it's a 22,000 foot peak in the
Himalaya, very near MountEverest, and if you've done, you
know the Mount Everest basecamp trek, which I've been lucky
enough to do.
You fly into the same place,but it's a different route.
Right, you have to go to adifferent side.
(04:04):
The next morning flew up toLukla.
They're all in Nepal and hadbeen trekking through the
mountains.
You know sleeping at tea houses,eating breakfast, lunch and
dinner in tea houses, and youknow tea houses, while remote,
are generally pretty decent, thefood is pretty good they have.
(04:24):
You know you still get bottlesof water and fresh water or you
can use the water on themountain and then you know
purify it and run it throughfilters and such and you can
drink it.
So if I ever did that, I wouldpurify it and I had tablets to
purify it and never had anyissues.
I mean, you get upset, stomachand such on the mountain, but
(04:44):
that's because you know thefood's a little different.
You're stressed, you're at highaltitude, there's a lot of
things going on.
So anyway, trekking up themountain toward Mera Peak and
everything was great, we got upto the mountain, got up pretty
high and was looking at going tobase camp to make an attempt on
summoning the peak and ended upgetting three days of
(05:09):
continuous snow, I mean whiteout snow.
So because of limitations ontime and time off and things
like that, I couldn't just situp there and wait for the
weather to clear Because,frankly, I had to get back.
I had, you know, I have a job,and so there was.
There was no way to extendbeyond what I had already
(05:31):
planned for, so made our wayback down, ended up being
stranded because of justunrelenting rain and fog and,
since Lukla is a visual onlyapproach airport if it's foggy,
the weather's bad, the planesaren't coming in and they didn't
come in, and so I had to sit ina tea house for a couple of
(05:54):
extra days in Lukla waiting fora flight out, and ended up
watching a bunch of old WWEwrestling.
It wasn't recent stuff and Idon't know what satellite they
were pulling it off of, but sureas shit.
In the middle of the Himalaya inNepal, myself, two Brits and a
tea house full of otherforeigners and guides and
(06:16):
porters and everything else aresitting there in the middle of
the day, all trying to get backto Kathmandu and have nothing to
do but watch wrestling reruns.
I mean, hey, you do what yougot to do to wait the timeout.
So anyway, it was actually apretty cool experience.
I was really disappointed notsummiting Mera Peak, but we'll
talk about that more on anothershow At that point.
(06:36):
Still perfectly fine, noproblems, feeling good.
Disappointed, but you know,physically felt fine.
So I ended up flying from Luklato a remote airport, not in
Kathmandu, because they werelimiting flights flying into
Kathmandu.
The flights out of Lukla werebacked up and so I ended up
having to fly to a very smallairport out in the middle of
(07:00):
nowhere, basically.
And then a group of us kind ofjoined together and arranged for
a van to drive us from thatairport back to Kathmandu.
That in and of itself was awild experience.
Not only were we packed intothis van with all of our gear
and a bunch of guys that hadbeen, you know, hiking and
(07:23):
trekking and mountain climbingfor the last you know couple of
weeks and hadn't really had abunch of guys that had been, you
know, hiking and trekking andmountain climbing for the last
you know couple of weeks andhadn't really had a bunch of
showers and, you know, certainlyneeded them.
It was an interesting ride, tosay the least.
Plus, we're going over mountainpasses, one lane roads.
I mean it's like NationalGeographic taking place right
there in front of your eyes,these buses and trucks on the
(07:44):
side of these little mountainroads, and it was wild.
And to top it all off, the daythat we were driving back into
Kathmandu was also holy for theHindu religion.
So there was people everywhereand there was all these little
towns and, of course,everybody's covered in color,
these colored powders and stuffAgain, very cool to see.
(08:06):
Loved getting the opportunityto see that, because it was.
I mean, it was really cool.
But I was so ready to get out ofthat damn van and off of that
road that at that point I didn'treally appreciate just how cool
it was.
So got dropped off in themiddle of Kathmandu.
The company that was handlingthe God service for me came and
got me, took me back to thehotel and the plan was to fly
(08:29):
out the next day.
So I got to the hotel, fine,kind of repacked my bags to get
ready to go home, drug out myclean clothes that I had stored
at the hotel, you know, took ashower, put on some new clothes
and figured out that I wanted togo get something to eat.
I hadn't had any meat in liketwo weeks because you don't eat
(08:49):
the meat on the mountain becauseit's been carried up there on
somebody's back and notrefrigerated and certainly my
American stomach would not havedone well with the meat.
So I was hungry for some typeof protein and I really didn't
care what kind it was.
So I started looking around onGoogle and turns out very close
(09:09):
to my hotel is a Japaneserestaurant.
Got really good reviews.
I'm like, hey, you know I loveJapanese food, let's do this.
So I Go to the Japaneserestaurant, have some karaage,
some yakitori, a couple of AsahiSuper Drys, anyway, ate a lot
of chicken.
Enjoyed it, had a good meal,went back to the hotel, took
(09:30):
another shower and got ready toleave the next morning had a
really early flight, got up thenext morning, had a ride waiting
for me to take me to the hotelor hotel to the airport.
I was flying Qatar Airways on a787 from Kathmandu to Doha and
then I was flying Qatar againfrom Doha to London.
(09:52):
And the thought there was isthere was some.
I had some points that I coulduse on United and so why not fly
up to London and then fly homein business class on United.
So flipped to London.
The plan was to take a day inLondon do some shopping for my
wife.
There's a fabric company that'sheadquartered in London that
she loves because she quilts,and so I was going to swing by
(10:15):
there, pick up some fabric thatshe can't get in the US and haul
it home with me, and you knowthat way have a little bit of a
break on the flight home.
Great plan, really excited.
Love London.
It's going to be great to getback.
Plus, I have another layover inDoha.
So great, get on the plane.
Everything's going fine, sittingin economy class on the on the
aisle, so I've got room tostretch out and everything.
(10:36):
They bring around somebreakfast.
So I eat and I settle in towatch a movie to pass the rest
of the time on the flight.
So I eat and I settle in towatch a movie to pass the rest
of the time on the flight.
I think the flight was aboutfive hours.
So I'm sitting there and I'mwatching I don't know what movie
, some movie, and all of asudden my stomach started
hurting really bad.
It started cramping up and Iwas like, ah, I might have to go
to the bathroom.
(10:56):
Yeah, no problem, I've been onenough flights.
You know my, my reserve of ofgoing to the restroom and having
to handle business has longsince disappeared.
And I don't care at this point.
I'll you know if I got to go, Igot to go, so whatever.
So I get up, go to the bathroomyou know, sitting there, feel a
little off, but not horrible,and use the restroom, kind of
(11:19):
feel better.
So get back up, head back to myseat, sit back down Drinking
some water, just hanging out andlike a ton of fucking bricks,
something just washes over me,just like, hits me, cold sweats,
stomach and knots, and I'm justlike, oh shit, I jump up out of
(11:43):
my seat and I am in a fuckingdead sprint to the bathroom.
Now, I haven't looked up to seeif there's any poor souls in
the bathroom, but if there was,I was going to beat the hell out
of the door until they got out.
Luckily for me I mean thinkyou're lucky stars on this one
One of the bathrooms was vacant,so I tear open the door, jump
(12:06):
in there, lock it, sit down andit's just.
I mean, it's a nightmare, it'sjust the worst of the worst.
I am in the middle of some verybad number two action and I
start getting nauseated and it's, you know, coming off the top
(12:26):
and the bottom at this point.
And here I am in a God forsakenairplane bathroom and I can't
go anywhere and I can't stopwhat's happening and I am just
panicked.
I don't know what the hell I'mgoing to do.
Well, I try to go back to myseat eventually, but quickly the
same exact thing happens.
(12:47):
I mean, I get sat down for twoseconds, I'm back in the
bathroom.
So basically, I figure out I'mriding this flight out in the
bathroom.
It's probably the best placefor me because, you know, if I
have to get up and try to makeit back to the bathroom and
there's somebody in there withhow I was feeling, it was going
(13:07):
to be bad for everyone.
I mean everyone.
I was going to take people downwith me, so better for me to
just lock myself in the bathroomand hope that it'll pass.
Well, it didn't pass, and hopethat it'll pass.
Well, it didn't pass.
(13:31):
When we finally arrived in Doha,I had dragged my ass out of the
bathroom, back to my seat andthe poor people sitting next to
me I mean my God, they must havelooked at me and thought I was
a ghost, because I know I had tobe.
You know, just pale eyes orbloodshot.
I mean I had to look, you know,just pale eyes or bloodshot.
I mean I I had to look likeutter shit, like I had just been
through hell, because I hadanyway, I had basically
(13:54):
evacuated any type of liquids oranything else in my body at
that point, and so I didn't havea whole lot to give.
So I sucked it up and got in myseat for the landing, got
landed, got out of the planeinto Doha airport and walked 50
feet and had to dead sprint tothe bathroom again, and this was
(14:16):
my life for the next four hours.
I was in just utter misery, tothe point to where I was
seriously wondering if I waseven going to be able to get on
the next flight, because theflight from Doha to London was
seven hours and I'm just likewhat am I going to do?
You're dehydrated, you feellike hell, you've been in the
(14:38):
bathroom for hours on end and atthat point anything sounds good
Hell.
You would take anything to makeit stop Right.
And you're also irrational inthat.
You know I couldn't come upwith a logical thing to do.
I think I even had some nauseamedicine with me, completely
forgot about it, didn't know itexisted.
(14:59):
I mean, I was so tunnelvisioned that I couldn't do
anything but either sit in achair or sit on the toilet.
Anyway, fought through you knowthe back and forth in Doha, get
on the plane to London.
I just said, screw it, I wantto get somewhere.
Because I knew that if I couldjust get to London I could get
to a hotel.
I had hotel reservations fortwo nights and it was at
(15:24):
Heathrow, so I wouldn't have togo very far.
And I was like, if I can justget there, I'll be okay, because
I figured if nothing else, Icould hole up in that room and
ride out the misery, right.
So I get on the plane to Londonand look, I'll tell you right
now Qatar Airways.
I already had pretty highthoughts on them.
(15:45):
I thought they were pretty damngood.
I mean, I know most people do.
They're always ranked reallyhigh.
And let me just say the cabincrew on that flight, especially
one flight attendant, she was anangel.
I mean I wish I could rememberher name.
But hell, I don't remember muchabout that trip, except you
know, the inside of a bathroom.
But I wish I could remember hername because I would have
(16:07):
emailed Qatar Airways and beenlike this woman is a saint.
I mean, as soon as I walked onthe plane, she must have spotted
my pale ghost nature and beenlike there's something wrong
with this jackass.
And she probably came up totalk to me to make sure that I
wasn't like a whack job orsomething.
And anyway, she came over andasked me, you know if I was okay
and you know what was going on.
(16:28):
And I told her because at thatpoint I just didn't give a shit.
Honestly, I didn't care if sheknew, great, if she didn't,
whatever, just get me to London,I don't give a damn what
happens.
And so that's what I did.
I, you know, I told her thewhole situation and I mean she
was an angel.
She brought me bottles of water,made sure I had, you know, a
(16:49):
cold towel.
You know she was trying to seeif there was anything that they
had on the plane that I might beable to keep down.
You know she brought me somefruit and whatever other bland
things she could find.
You know I ended up not eatinga damn bit of it because the
thought of of putting anythingin my mouth at that point was so
disgusting and so horrifyingthat I just couldn't do it.
(17:09):
It was all I could do to drinkwater just to keep my mouth
somewhat, you know, wet and fromturning into like sand and dust
because I was so dehydrated atthat point.
Anyway, that flight went prettymuch as you can imagine.
I spent most of it in thebathroom in a very bad way, and
(17:29):
when I didn't, I spent the restof the time kind of leaning up
against the wall of the planebecause at least it was kind of
cool and it felt good on my head.
That's all I could reallymanage.
Didn't eat anything, only dranksome water.
That was it.
Got to London.
It was Terminal 4 at Heathrow,or Terminal 5.
It had been Terminal 5.
Anyway, whatever terminal Qatarcomes in, it's not a great
(17:52):
terminal.
At Heathrow I mean, I've flownin and out of the Queens
Terminal it's great Terminal 2.
This terminal, it was awarehouse right.
The luggage was in the verybottom of it.
I had to go all the waydownstairs to get these two
giant duffel bags I had with me,because it's all my climbing
gear, all my cold weather gear,and so they weigh a ton, and I'm
(18:14):
just, I don't have the strengthto do anything.
I dragged these damn bagsupstairs somehow to the taxi
line because my hotel isattached to the Queens Terminal,
so it's attached to Terminal 2.
And there was no way I wasgetting on the train at that
point.
I mean I couldn't, I barelycould tell you my name.
So gotten the black cab verynice cabbie which, by the way,
(18:37):
real quick side note here youknow most people will tell you
oh, don't take black cabs, aretoo expensive and they are
pricey.
Don't get me wrong, but I havenever run into a bad black cab
driver.
They have always been extremelynice and wanted to chat and
it's been an enjoyable rideevery time.
And this was late at night thistime and this guy was still
(19:00):
chatty and friendly.
So yeah, it may be a coupleextra dollars, but it's fucking
worth it in London, I meanfrankly, it really is, it's just
great.
Anyway, back to my story.
Make it to the hotel, getchecked in.
Don't really have to talk toanybody, thank God, cause they
would have probably thought Iwas bringing in the plague to
the hotel.
Made it into the room, passedout, woke up sometime the next
(19:24):
day, finally, having somewhatregained some semblance of
dignity in my life, I wasfeeling a little bit better,
ended up making it into the cityfor a little while to get my
wife's fabric, which was nice.
It got me out, it got me to doa few things, came back to the
hotel, slept, got up later, wentto the actually to the hotel
(19:48):
restaurant, had a little bit ofchicken which what a ballsy move
on my part, because I'm prettysure the chicken I had in
Kathmandu was what did me in butanyway, I figured it was bland
enough.
I had some chicken and thenwent back to sleep.
Got up the next morning,figured it was bland enough, I
had some chicken and then wentback to sleep.
Got up the next morning, flewhome.
Felt like absolute shit thewhole time flying home, but it
had subsided at that point towhere I wasn't in the bathroom
(20:09):
the entire time and thank God Iwas in Polaris on United, so at
least I had a lie, flat bed, wasable to get some sleep and
relax.
Didn't really eat.
But I'm just telling you rightnow, man, if there's ever
something that you want to avoidwhile traveling, it's food
poisoning.
But if you're going to get it,if you're going to do something
stupid, eat something risky,drink something risky, whatever
(20:33):
you make damn sure that when youdo that, you are somewhere
where you're going to be for acouple of days, because I can
tell you what, my friends, youdo not ever and I mean ever want
to experience the Nepalnightmare like I did Stuck
inside a speeding tube at 500miles an hour, 40,000 feet in
(20:58):
the air and you've got nowhereto go.
It is an absolute nightmare.
Trust me, I've lived it.
I know this has been kind of aninteresting episode, but hey,
this is what we do on thispodcast, right, we talk about
real travel.
It's not always rainbows andsunshine.
Sometimes it all happens in thetoilet.
Intro (21:19):
This has been Trade Tables and Time Zones.
Worldwide travel is one of thefunnest things you can do in
life and it's our passion totalk about the good, the bad,
the funny and the ugly.
Nothing is off limits.
We hope you've enjoyed the show.
If you did, make sure to like,rate and review.
(21:40):
We'll be back soon, but in themeantime, find us on Instagram
at Trade Tables and Time Zones,and for questions or comments,
send your email totradesandtimes at gmailcom.
Take care and see you next timeon Trade Tables and Time Zones.
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