May 9, 2025 • 30 mins
Have you ever held onto a hurt so deep you didn’t know if you could ever let it go? In this episode of Unrelated Sisters: Truth & Grace Conversation, we’re diving into forgiveness—what it is, what it’s not, and how it sets you free. In this heartfelt episode of, we unpack the power of forgiveness through scripture, story, and honest conversation. Featuring a touching radio story about a father and son, Bible passages from Ephesians, Matthew, and Colossians, and real-life moments of grace, this episode is for anyone carrying hurt. Learn how forgiveness doesn’t excuse the pain—but releases the weight. Join your hosts for a conversation of hope, healing, and freedom.
We want this to be truly interactive podcast. Please go in the fan mail at
https://unrelatedsisterspodcast.buzzsprout.com and tell us your stories and let us know if it’s okay to share (no names). Let us know if you need prayer or how we can support you in your journey. Thank you so much for taking the time to listen. Follow us on Facebook @Unrelated Sister's: Truth & Grace Conversation Podcast or Email us at unrelatedsisterspodcast@gmail.com
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Episode Transcript
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Unknown (00:01):
Bye.
We thank you for thisopportunity, Father, to come
into your presence, God.
Lord, as we speak today, Lord,you would just give us a bonus
(00:23):
in confidence that we need,Lord, to speak your word with
truth and grace.
And God, I pray for everylistener today, God, that this
word would just go forth and notreturn void, God, and it would
just set some people free today.
In Jesus' name, amen.
Speaker 01 (00:38):
Amen.
Hey, y'all.
Welcome back to UnrelatedSisters Truth and Grace
Conversation.
I'm Shannon, and I'm joined byan amazing co-host, Deb.
Today, we're getting real aboutsomething that's easier said
than done, forgiveness.
Speaker 00 (00:53):
That's right.
Forgiveness can feelimpossible, especially when the
wounds are deep.
But God didn't just call us toforgive.
He equips us to forgive.
And today's episode is full ofscripture, encouragement, and
one story heard on the radiothat moved people.
So our theme verse today isEphesians 4.32.
(01:14):
I love this verse.
It says,Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving on another, even as God in Christ forgave you. Amen.
Speaker 01 (01:26):
That is a wonderful verse.
So I want to start today with aquestion.
Have you ever had one of thosearguments with family, the kind
you think you can never comeback from?
Oh,
Speaker 00 (01:39):
yeah.
Like the ones that where thewords cut deep and, you said
some stuff that you thought, oh,we will never get out of this.
Speaker 01 (01:49):
Well, this week on the radio, I heard a story and I
want to sharethe store that brought me to tears
.
There was a father and a sonwho got into one of those
blow-up arguments.
The son stormed out.
They didn't speak for years.
One day, the son felt thisaching in his soul, like he just
needed to go home.
So he wrote his dad a letter.
In it, hesaid, on Friday I will be on the train the one that passes by the big oak tree in the backyard. If you want me to come home then hang a piece of white cloth in the the tree. If I see it I will get of at the next stop. If I don't I see the cloth I understand.
(02:23):
The day came.
The son was nervous.
A passenger noticed and askedwhat was wrong.
He told them the story.
And when they neared the house,he said, the tree's on your
side.
Can you look?
The passenger turned and lookedand said, son, there's not one
cloth.
There are dozens.
(02:43):
Forgiveness makes a way home.
So hearing that story, I justbawled in my car after the DJ
told the story because thatforgiveness God does for
us everyday, right?
He forgave us for everythingthat He knew we were going to
do, for everything that we'vedone.
(03:04):
And He didn't just hang onewhite claw.
He's hung one for everythingwe've ever done, right?
And to feel that or tounderstand that, it just blows
my mind.
I cried like a baby for like 20minutes after hearing this.
Speaker 00 (03:24):
I love that.
Sometimes we think thatforgiveness means that what
happened didn't hurt us, but itdoesn't mean that.
It doesn't mean trust isautomatically restored.
We think that it's just goingto happen.
(03:45):
It's just going to happen.
And that's not
Speaker 01 (03:48):
always the case.
Just because we forgivesomebody doesn't mean we have to
forget, right?
There's those things that'shappened to us in life, those
traumatic things that's happenedto us.
The things that we can't comeback
from, but with Gods grace we can heal.
There's those things that maybewe did to someone, right?
(04:09):
I remember when I was gettinghigh that...
People were doormats,what did you have for me?
I didn't have friends.
I didn't have people that Itruly loved.
They were all doormats.
They,were ponds in my game, and they were only around as long as I needed them,
Right?
And I never did 12 steps.
And so I don't know anythingabout those programs, but I do
(04:32):
know that one of those is you'resupposed to go and ask for
forgiveness from the people thatyou did wrong, you know, and I
don't know that I did that withpeople that I did wrong.
I separated myself from thosepeople because most of them are
drug addicts, just like me, drugdealers, just like me, all
those different things.
But, uh, there was people in mylife that I should have asked
(04:57):
forgiveness from, you know, andI didn't right away.
I just kind of let, hope timewould heal, heal all wounds.
Right.
And I feel like sometimes youhave to ask for forgiveness.
You need to ask for forgivenessbecause you don't, ask for
forgiveness or you don't giveforgiveness for that person,
(05:19):
right?
You do it for yourself.
Whether it's asking for it orgetting it or giving it to
someone, you know, you're goingto ask for it.
Forgiveness will give youfreedom.
It will release you from thedebts so that you don't do it
again and pretend that it didn'thappen.
And that is my thing, right?
Pretending like it just didn'thappen.
That's what I like to do.
Speaker 00 (05:42):
You know, I've heard a lot of people in my life when
I was out in addiction, and mykids, my family, and I had a lot
of things done to me.
And so, I think it was easy forme to forgive people,
realistically.
(06:02):
I don't know if it's justbecause I was you know, I wanted
that same grace, or I justdidn't want to think about it,
or I just wanted to pretend likeit didn't happen.
So, I mean, there were sometraumatic things that happened
to me as a young child that alot of people don't know, you
know what I mean?
Maybe one day we'll go intodetail, but I didn't even talk
(06:22):
about it for, I don't know,maybe 10 or 15 years.
And I just acted like it didn'thappen.
And then, you know, I told myparents about it one day, and,
well, they just went crazy, andI had forgave the person, but it
was still there.
You know what I mean?
Of course, that hurt was stillthere.
(06:44):
I thought I had forgave them.
But then when I openly talkedabout it, when I finally told my
parents about it, it was like,oh wait, there's more.
You know what I mean?
You've got to talk about it.
You've got to get through this.
I think a lot of times aswomen, we just...
cover things up and we want topretend like, oh, it's okay.
(07:05):
It didn't happen.
In reality, it did.
And when I finally went andactually, I didn't go to the
person to tell them I forgavethem, but I told God that I
forgave them.
And there was peace.
There's freedom.
I don't even think about itanymore until things like this
do come up.
And I'm like, trying to think,you know what I mean?
(07:28):
Right.
We don't have unforgiveness.
And I'm like, Well, I thank youfor healing me from that
because, you know, a lot oftimes I feel like in my
addiction that was a trigger.
That was things that I wouldthink about and be like, oh, and
then I would go be high over itor, you know, this happened to
me.
But once I did actually forgivethis person, it started
(07:50):
bringing healing to my life.
Eventually, I don't remember itanymore.
You know
Speaker 01 (07:55):
what I mean?
Right.
It's not the first thing thatpops in your head.
Yeah.
Yeah, at the age of 28, I wasdiagnosed with PTSD.
And the PTSD doesn't comebecause I went to war or that
I've ever been a police officeror any of those jobs.
I've never done anything likethat.
But it comes from the traumathat I went through, through my
(08:17):
addiction and pretending like itdidn't happen, right?
Not dealing with it at thetime.
The counselor that I had seenwho diagnosed me, she was like,
you know, there's a lot thereand I'm like, Oh no, I'm fine.
Right.
Like there we are again.
I'm fine.
It's fine.
It's all fine.
Right.
Um, just like in last week'sthing, you know, those words
(08:39):
there we are again with I'mfine, you know, and, uh, but
that was part of the reason Icouldn't bond with my kid.
Right.
Because I just didn't, I justdidn't deal.
So I didn't have emotions.
Right.
And PTSD is real.
Like, um, and it, you know, ittriggers, um, Certain things in
life trigger that, and I've hadincidents happen since that have
(09:03):
triggered the fear.
It's the flight or fight fear.
But I haven't had one since Ifound grace.
I've not had that.
I've not lost that.
I've not had that anxiety.
I've not had that need.
You know, to do other things,to not think about it.
(09:26):
I've been able to talk about myabusive relationships.
I've been able to talk aboutthe...
The trauma that happened thefirst time, the reason I started
drinking and partying and thereason that I just kind of quit
life.
And I've been able to surpassall of those things.
And it's not like it happenedtoday or it happened yesterday
(09:49):
or it happened a year down theroad, right?
It's taken several, severalyears and a lot of counseling.
Last week we talked aboutfinding that safe person to talk
to.
And that is crucial.
You've got to have it.
You've got to dive into theword and you've got to dive into
(10:09):
your prayer and you've got todive into Jesus, but you've also
got to have that human therethat you can, that you can talk
to.
And usually it's better if it'sa stranger, right?
It's easier to open up to astranger than it is to open up
to people that love you orpeople that you feel like are
going to judge you, you know,and that's one of the things.
But when we talk aboutforgiveness, I'll, My sister,
(10:33):
she's four years younger thanme, and my daddy used to think
that if he made her go with me,that I wouldn't do stupid
things.
Well, I would do stupid things,and I would drag her right
along with me.
And when I took a left andstarted getting high and
partying all the time and stuff,she didn't.
(10:55):
She continued to get straightA's, and she continued.
She went to college, and shegot a degree in early education,
and she met the man of herdreams and they got married and
they bought, you know, theybought several houses and
they've, they've always seemedto have their life together.
And I guess it's probably aboutsix months ago.
She calls me up, we're havinglunch and she's like, I read
(11:16):
this study and I didn't realizethat everybody wasn't like me.
And I was like, what are youtalking about?
Smart?
You know?
And she's like, no, she's like,There's like 5% of the
population that don't worryabout things, and I'm one of
those people.
And she goes, and you used tomake me so mad when we were kids
(11:39):
and then when we were adults,because you would be mad about
something or hurt aboutsomething, and then the next day
it was like it didn't happen.
I don't know if that's a goodthing or a bad thing, right?
But that's how I am.
So if I worry about somethingtoday...
When I lay my head down, I giveit to God.
And when I get up the nextmorning, I don't think no more
about it.
Right.
Now the devil or the enemy willwhisper things into my ears
(12:03):
and, you know, make me thinkabout something from two weeks
ago or make me, I'm not sayingthat that doesn't happen because
it does, but you know, you haveto make a decision sometimes.
Right.
And in Matthew 6, 14 and 15, itsays, if you forgive others,
your father will forgive you.
You know, if you forgive othersright so sometimes it's not
(12:27):
about forgiving others sometimesit's about asking for
forgiveness that was where mystory was going so
Speaker 00 (12:34):
you know one of the things that when we talk about
forgiveness that i always cometo me and you talked about this
earlier um you know me and kevinhad a lot We did a lot of
things to each other.
He was very abusive, and wetalked openly about this because
that was in our past.
That's not who we are today.
He's wonderful today, just forthe record.
(12:54):
He is.
But there was a lot of abuse,and there was a lot of fighting,
and there was infidelity onboth parts.
And when he went to prison thelast time, I really just
wanted—I was ready for theworst.
And so when the word— told methat wasn't going to happen.
That's why I prayed about it.
(13:15):
We made the decision, both ofus, that if we were going to
make this work, we were going toforgive each other.
So we both asked forforgiveness, and we both made
the decision that we weren'tgoing to bring up anything that
we had done to each other.
If we were going to make thismarriage work, and God was going
(13:36):
to restore this, I wanted Himto restore it.
Completely.
Only our marriage should bewhole.
And so for me, back in the day,I was a tip or tap person.
You know what I mean?
Oh, yeah.
I'm going to get you back evenmore.
It was very revengeful.
But the Lord took all that.
He literally took all that.
(13:58):
It's amazing, right?
And so that is one thing I'm soproud of, that when we do have
disagreements and we havearguments like people do,
marriage couples do, We don'tbring up our past.
We do not bring up, never onetime in these past four years
since the Lord has restored us,do we bring up anything that has
Speaker 01 (14:20):
happened.
You know, and that right there,that one statement that you
just said, that shows you, tome, in my eyes, the power of
God, right?
Because if you choose, if...
you know, if someone has brokenyour trust, right, that's the
hardest thing to come back from.
(14:41):
And then if you choose to stayin that and you choose to stay
in that marriage, then you haveto make those decisions, right?
Like you can't, you can't belike every time something
happens or every time somebodydoesn't come home on time, you
can't be that way, right?
You can't be, you can't be on,you know, social media and you
(15:02):
can't be you know, lookingthrough their phone and, and
thinking all every time in theback of your head, you know,
and, and that's one of thethings that, you know, I talked
about my daddy last week, right.
And about not, um, trusting,you know, not, uh, when he
doesn't contact me, right.
What's he doing?
(15:22):
What's he up to?
Right.
Uh, you know, and, and that'sone of those, that's one of
those, he's asked forforgiveness, right.
Uh, when we, uh, He wentthrough drug court, and he's
been clean since drug court.
But he went through drug court,and one of the steps in drug
court is the people that he'shurt, he has to bring them in
(15:43):
with his counselor, and he hasto just sit there and listen to
anything and everything we say.
And me and my sister did it,and that was very healing for
me, right?
I have always been a daddy'sgirl, and my daddy...
did no wrong and then when Ifinally seen the wrong that he
was doing or when I finallyunderstood what it means to be a
(16:08):
parent and love your childunconditionally and I'm not
saying my daddy didn't love mebecause he did he loved me the
only way he knew how but youknow just to be able to tell him
you know because my daddytaught me to be the world's
greatest manipulator like Youknow, it's all about what
(16:28):
Shannon wanted and what Shannonneeded.
And, you know, and I learned atan early age how to be the
world's greatest manipulator.
And which now I can't do it tosave my life.
right?
Like I can't, right?
Like now I can't, I try, youknow, sometimes I catch myself
sliding into it or whatever.
(16:49):
And then I feel so guilty.
Like I have to just shut up.
And that's weird for me becausethat's how I've been for, you
know, that was how I was for, Ifeel like half my life, you
know, and, but that's theforgiveness, right?
That's where God has forgivenme for the choices that I've
made.
And, and, and that's that, um,what is it?
(17:09):
That angel that taps on thatshoulder and be like, Hmm, Do
you really want to do that?
And those are hard to deal withsometimes.
But God knows our pain, and Heknows our bitterness, and He
knows how slow and poisonous itcan be.
That's why you have to forgivepeople.
Everybody's like, I can forgivethem, but I'm not going to
(17:29):
forget.
If you truly forgive them, andyou truly give it to God, then
that poison goes away.
And you don't have to thinkabout forgetting it because it
just goes away.
Right?
I mean, that's like what youwere talking about, like your
traumas and things like that,the things in the past.
(17:50):
Once you truly lay it down, andI can't, people just don't
understand that.
And I don't know why they do.
I don't know why they don'tunderstand it.
But once he gives youforgiveness, he'll whisper to
you, you're not doing this forthem.
You're doing this for yourself.
Right?
You're doing this for you.
(18:10):
Because that's how you heal.
Healing has to be the mostimportant part of forgiveness.
You can't forgive because ofthis or can't forgive because of
that.
You have to forgive becauseyou're ready to heal.
I
Speaker 00 (18:27):
think one of my favorite statements is, I choose
to be better, not bitter.
Because bitterness can eat youup.
And I just choose not to feellike that anymore.
Speaker 01 (18:39):
Right.
Speaker 00 (18:40):
And it's a choice.
Speaker 01 (18:41):
It is definitely a choice.
Speaker 00 (18:43):
And I think that we get into this, I think about
this a lot, forgiving people.
I feel like I do that easily.
Probably I'm my worst enemy.
I think that for me, forgivingmyself was harder than anybody
else because...
(19:03):
I had to look at myself in themirror and think all the things
that I've done to my kids and myfamily.
Until I truly, truly forgavemyself, the guilt and the shame
just keeps you in this viciouscycle.
I'm not that person anymore.
That's not who I am.
(19:23):
Forgive me today.
When I truly made thosestatements, it was like a
balloon release.
It goes up in the air and justgoes away.
Speaker 01 (19:33):
Oh, yeah.
It's, you know, you hear peopletalk about this peace that
succumbs all peace, right?
That's what that is.
And I agree.
And, you know, and that's whatI tell everybody who is new
coming out of addiction, right?
They talk about, well, youknow, I need to do this and I
need to do that and I need tofix this and I need to fix that.
(19:54):
First and foremost, you need tofix you.
Speaker 00 (19:57):
Yeah.
Speaker 01 (19:58):
Right.
First and foremost, you can'theal.
You can't fix any relationshipin your past, any relationship
in your forward.
Nothing until you healyourself.
Right.
Until you forgive yourself.
You know, I have I have afriend and she's going through a
lot of things right now.
And, you know, she talked to methis week about it and she said
(20:19):
that she thought she hadforgiven herself.
the people that's in thesituation that she's in.
And she said, when you weretalking about picking the chain
up and playing with it, that'swhat she feels like she's doing
or going through right now.
But she keeps making thisstatement.
Well, I did this because I wantto be a good mom.
(20:41):
Or I did this because I want todo...
And I think what she reallyneeds to do is...
figure out how to forgiveherself.
Right.
And I haven't told her that.
And so she'll, she's going tohear this and cry.
Uh, and I'm sorry.
Um, when she listens to thispodcast, but it just hit me
sitting here.
She needs to forgive herself.
(21:03):
She needs to quit worryingabout forgiving the people that
has hurt her.
And she needs to find how, howto forgive herself first.
Right.
Because you can't, I'm a badmom.
You can't that that's, that'sone of those that you have to
let go of.
Right.
Unknown (21:19):
Um,
Speaker 01 (21:19):
For me,
Speaker 00 (21:20):
it kept me in victim mode until I truly started
forgiving myself.
I'm always the victim for apitiful me.
But then when I come out ofthat, then I can walk in
victory, a victor, not a victim.
And so it changes your wholemindset.
Speaker 01 (21:37):
Right.
I agree.
And there's steps forforgiveness.
There's practical things thatyou can ask for.
There's practical things thatyou can do.
pray for the person, right?
Start with just saying theirname or even if your whispers,
you know, whisper it throughyour tears, start with asking
(21:59):
God to help you forgive them,right?
You know, when you pray,praying and saying their name
and sometimes saying their nameis just as hard, right?
But start with that asking forhelp, right?
I guess the first step way outof addiction is realizing you
got a problem, right?
And the second one is askingfor help.
(22:20):
So, and it's funny howeverything goes back to the
steps that we teach people, thethings that we do, you know,
writing a letter.
That's what I did with mydaddy.
I didn't write the letter, butwhen he asked me to come and
talk with him, I wrote this likefive page thing.
(22:43):
Right.
And, and it had everything thatI'd ever wanted to say and was
too scared to say.
Right.
And I was too scared to behonest with the way I felt
because I was afraid he wouldn'tlove me anymore.
Right.
I was afraid that if I wastruly honest about how the
things he'd done hurt me, thathe wouldn't love me anymore.
(23:06):
Right.
Because he was always one ofthose.
But I did this for you.
And I did that for you.
But that's not what I wanted.
I just wanted you to bepresent.
And you talk about that withOren.
He don't care.
He just wants you to bepresent.
And that's all I wanted.
A lot
Speaker 00 (23:29):
of times people think that forgiving means that
you're weak.
You're not weak.
Forgiving is actually powerful.
Speaker 01 (23:36):
It's so powerful.
Speaker 00 (23:38):
You're definitely not weak.
It shows so much strength.
when you truly forgive aperson.
You know, there was a situationmy dad went through a few years
back with a family member that,you know, as a daughter, you
know, when somebody hurts yourfamily member or whatever, you
know, things happen, you know,you're hurt too.
(23:59):
And so there was a lot ofunforgiveness and my dad had to,
probably it's been, let's see,10 years, I guess, he had the
opportunity to see this personface-to-face as a family member
and ask for forgiveness.
Even though he felt like hewasn't in the wrong, it was the
(24:21):
other person.
Dad needed to do that.
He told me.
It was such a breakthrough forhim.
It encouraged me, too, becauseit was like I had to do that to
move forward.
Right.
He said, and when I did, andthe person didn't even really
accept it, but Dad was so free.
He said it was just like...
A ton of bricks.
(24:42):
You know, this has been a10-year event.
Speaker 01 (24:44):
Right.
Speaker 00 (24:44):
You know what
Speaker 01 (24:44):
I mean?
Well, yeah, and at the end ofthe day, I think that's why you
forgive people, right?
It's to get those bricks off.
It's to take out another linkof the chain, you know, because
I think everything that we gothrough, I think it's one big
chain wrapped around.
I feel like it's one big chainwrapped around us, and it's link
(25:07):
by link, and that's how we doit.
But you have to chooseforgiveness daily, and you have
to set boundaries.
Just because you giveforgiveness, it doesn't mean
that they get access.
And that's some of the traumathings.
I have family that I haven'tseen in years, and it's not that
(25:28):
they did anything to me.
I just can't be around theirlifestyle.
I just can't be a part of thatlifestyle because...
honestly i don't know if icould say no if i went around
and they had you know a joint ora line of a line or something i
don't know i don't know if icould say no and like i said
i've been clean it'll be 23years in july you know and i
(25:51):
don't i don't know i don't knowi choose not to put myself in
those situations um so that idon't have to make that decision
right so um At the end of theday, we just want everyone to
know, no matter what they'regoing through, no matter what's
going on, that you're not alone,that the feelings that you
(26:14):
have, it's not crazy, right?
It's the feelings that youhave.
Sometimes people make you feellike the feelings that you have
are wrong.
If that's how you feel, that'show you feel, right?
And at the end of the day, it'sall that matters is God sees
you.
He heals you and He redeemsyou.
Speaker 00 (26:34):
Yes, He does.
I'm so thankful that we talkedon this today because, you know,
forgiveness is another thing tokeep you free.
You know, you think, well, I'mwalking in freedom.
Are you?
You're holding on to someunforgiveness there, you know?
So sometimes you think, well,I'll forgive everybody.
So I encourage you today to, inyour quiet time, to just ask
(26:59):
the Lord, Lord, is theresomebody in my life That I need
to forgive.
Because there might be placesin your life that you don't even
realize that you haven'tforgave them.
Right.
And that might be a stumblingblock later on down the road.
So I just encourage you in yourquiet time to just get your pen
and paper and write it down.
Right.
Because there's somebody in mylife that I need to forgive or
(27:20):
that I need to ask them toforgive me.
Or it might be yourself.
Speaker 01 (27:24):
Right.
And at the end of the day,that's...
what this is all about, right?
The reason that we do thispodcast, the reason that we are
doing this podcast is so that atthe end of the day, you can
find that freedom.
You know, I had someone ask metoday or the other day, ask me,
(27:44):
why did you start a podcast?
And I was like, because Godtold me to.
And it's not really, I mean,that is why we started one.
But the grace and the peace ofthat I have felt the last six or
seven years of my life, I wanteverybody to feel that peace.
I want everybody to truly walkin that freedom.
(28:06):
I want them to truly find that.
We talk a lot about...
loss or about an empty hole ortrying to fulfill something in
our hearts.
And at the end of the day,that's everything.
That's what we were chasingback in the day.
We were trying to fill a voidsomewhere in our life.
(28:29):
And at the end of the day, theonly thing that ever filled that
void was God.
It was Jesus.
It was the things that...
and I have to be thankful forthe things that I went through
and for the thing, you know,it's made me who I am today.
Um, it's definitely taught methe grace that I have, uh, every
(28:51):
day, you know, and I'm not thebest at it, right?
I'm not the best at givinggrace.
Um, I have my moments.
Uh, we were laughing about itearlier.
Uh, when I print this up, whenI print an outline up of our,
uh, of what we're going to talkabout today, uh, the computer
automatically puts truth onwhere I'm supposed to talk and
(29:12):
put grace where you're supposedto talk.
And everybody was talking abouthow loud I was and how quiet
you were.
And I was like, it's becauseI'm truth and she's grace.
That's just how it is, right?
God brought us together for areason.
And then at the end of the day,that's where we're at.
And I want everyone to takethose steps forward to get where
(29:32):
they need to be.
Yes.
Speaker 00 (29:37):
You need to pray us out?
Yep.
Alright.
God, we thank you for yourmercy.
We ask you that you would teachus to forgive the way that you
do.
Heal every heart listeningright now, losing every chain of
bitterness, resentment, andpain, and give us grace for
today and strength to forgiveagain tomorrow.
(29:58):
Lord, I surrender the weight ofunforgiveness.
Help me release what I can'tcarry.
I trust you with the healing inJesus' name.
Amen.
Speaker 01 (30:07):
Amen.
If this episode stirredsomething in your heart, share
it with someone who might needit.
Follow us at Unrelated SistersPodcast and subscribe for more
truth and grace.
Until next time, keep yourheart safe and your spirit
anchored in love.
Amen.
Bye.
We thank you for thisopportunity, Father, to come
into your presence, God.
Lord, as we speak today, Lord,you would just give us a bonus
(00:23):
in confidence that we need,Lord, to speak your word with
truth and grace.
And God, I pray for everylistener today, God, that this
word would just go forth and notreturn void, God, and it would
just set some people free today.
In Jesus' name, amen.
Speaker 01 (00:38):
Amen.
Hey, y'all.
Welcome back to UnrelatedSisters Truth and Grace
Conversation.
I'm Shannon, and I'm joined byan amazing co-host, Deb.
Today, we're getting real aboutsomething that's easier said
than done, forgiveness.
Speaker 00 (00:53):
That's right.
Forgiveness can feelimpossible, especially when the
wounds are deep.
But God didn't just call us toforgive.
He equips us to forgive.
And today's episode is full ofscripture, encouragement, and
one story heard on the radiothat moved people.
So our theme verse today isEphesians 4.32.
(01:14):
I love this verse.
It says,Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving on another, even as God in Christ forgave you. Amen.
Speaker 01 (01:26):
That is a wonderful verse.
So I want to start today with aquestion.
Have you ever had one of thosearguments with family, the kind
you think you can never comeback from?
Oh,
Speaker 00 (01:39):
yeah.
Like the ones that where thewords cut deep and, you said
some stuff that you thought, oh,we will never get out of this.
Speaker 01 (01:49):
Well, this week on the radio, I heard a story and I
want to sharethe store that brought me to tears
.
There was a father and a sonwho got into one of those
blow-up arguments.
The son stormed out.
They didn't speak for years.
One day, the son felt thisaching in his soul, like he just
needed to go home.
So he wrote his dad a letter.
In it, hesaid, on Friday I will be on the train the one that passes by the big oak tree in the backyard. If you want me to come home then hang a piece of white cloth in the the tree. If I see it I will get of at the next stop. If I don't I see the cloth I understand.
(02:23):
The day came.
The son was nervous.
A passenger noticed and askedwhat was wrong.
He told them the story.
And when they neared the house,he said, the tree's on your
side.
Can you look?
The passenger turned and lookedand said, son, there's not one
cloth.
There are dozens.
(02:43):
Forgiveness makes a way home.
So hearing that story, I justbawled in my car after the DJ
told the story because thatforgiveness God does for
us everyday, right?
He forgave us for everythingthat He knew we were going to
do, for everything that we'vedone.
(03:04):
And He didn't just hang onewhite claw.
He's hung one for everythingwe've ever done, right?
And to feel that or tounderstand that, it just blows
my mind.
I cried like a baby for like 20minutes after hearing this.
Speaker 00 (03:24):
I love that.
Sometimes we think thatforgiveness means that what
happened didn't hurt us, but itdoesn't mean that.
It doesn't mean trust isautomatically restored.
We think that it's just goingto happen.
(03:45):
It's just going to happen.
And that's not
Speaker 01 (03:48):
always the case.
Just because we forgivesomebody doesn't mean we have to
forget, right?
There's those things that'shappened to us in life, those
traumatic things that's happenedto us.
The things that we can't comeback
from, but with Gods grace we can heal.
There's those things that maybewe did to someone, right?
(04:09):
I remember when I was gettinghigh that...
People were doormats,what did you have for me?
I didn't have friends.
I didn't have people that Itruly loved.
They were all doormats.
They,were ponds in my game, and they were only around as long as I needed them,
Right?
And I never did 12 steps.
And so I don't know anythingabout those programs, but I do
(04:32):
know that one of those is you'resupposed to go and ask for
forgiveness from the people thatyou did wrong, you know, and I
don't know that I did that withpeople that I did wrong.
I separated myself from thosepeople because most of them are
drug addicts, just like me, drugdealers, just like me, all
those different things.
But, uh, there was people in mylife that I should have asked
(04:57):
forgiveness from, you know, andI didn't right away.
I just kind of let, hope timewould heal, heal all wounds.
Right.
And I feel like sometimes youhave to ask for forgiveness.
You need to ask for forgivenessbecause you don't, ask for
forgiveness or you don't giveforgiveness for that person,
(05:19):
right?
You do it for yourself.
Whether it's asking for it orgetting it or giving it to
someone, you know, you're goingto ask for it.
Forgiveness will give youfreedom.
It will release you from thedebts so that you don't do it
again and pretend that it didn'thappen.
And that is my thing, right?
Pretending like it just didn'thappen.
That's what I like to do.
Speaker 00 (05:42):
You know, I've heard a lot of people in my life when
I was out in addiction, and mykids, my family, and I had a lot
of things done to me.
And so, I think it was easy forme to forgive people,
realistically.
(06:02):
I don't know if it's justbecause I was you know, I wanted
that same grace, or I justdidn't want to think about it,
or I just wanted to pretend likeit didn't happen.
So, I mean, there were sometraumatic things that happened
to me as a young child that alot of people don't know, you
know what I mean?
Maybe one day we'll go intodetail, but I didn't even talk
(06:22):
about it for, I don't know,maybe 10 or 15 years.
And I just acted like it didn'thappen.
And then, you know, I told myparents about it one day, and,
well, they just went crazy, andI had forgave the person, but it
was still there.
You know what I mean?
Of course, that hurt was stillthere.
(06:44):
I thought I had forgave them.
But then when I openly talkedabout it, when I finally told my
parents about it, it was like,oh wait, there's more.
You know what I mean?
You've got to talk about it.
You've got to get through this.
I think a lot of times aswomen, we just...
cover things up and we want topretend like, oh, it's okay.
(07:05):
It didn't happen.
In reality, it did.
And when I finally went andactually, I didn't go to the
person to tell them I forgavethem, but I told God that I
forgave them.
And there was peace.
There's freedom.
I don't even think about itanymore until things like this
do come up.
And I'm like, trying to think,you know what I mean?
(07:28):
Right.
We don't have unforgiveness.
And I'm like, Well, I thank youfor healing me from that
because, you know, a lot oftimes I feel like in my
addiction that was a trigger.
That was things that I wouldthink about and be like, oh, and
then I would go be high over itor, you know, this happened to
me.
But once I did actually forgivethis person, it started
(07:50):
bringing healing to my life.
Eventually, I don't remember itanymore.
You know
Speaker 01 (07:55):
what I mean?
Right.
It's not the first thing thatpops in your head.
Yeah.
Yeah, at the age of 28, I wasdiagnosed with PTSD.
And the PTSD doesn't comebecause I went to war or that
I've ever been a police officeror any of those jobs.
I've never done anything likethat.
But it comes from the traumathat I went through, through my
(08:17):
addiction and pretending like itdidn't happen, right?
Not dealing with it at thetime.
The counselor that I had seenwho diagnosed me, she was like,
you know, there's a lot thereand I'm like, Oh no, I'm fine.
Right.
Like there we are again.
I'm fine.
It's fine.
It's all fine.
Right.
Um, just like in last week'sthing, you know, those words
(08:39):
there we are again with I'mfine, you know, and, uh, but
that was part of the reason Icouldn't bond with my kid.
Right.
Because I just didn't, I justdidn't deal.
So I didn't have emotions.
Right.
And PTSD is real.
Like, um, and it, you know, ittriggers, um, Certain things in
life trigger that, and I've hadincidents happen since that have
(09:03):
triggered the fear.
It's the flight or fight fear.
But I haven't had one since Ifound grace.
I've not had that.
I've not lost that.
I've not had that anxiety.
I've not had that need.
You know, to do other things,to not think about it.
(09:26):
I've been able to talk about myabusive relationships.
I've been able to talk aboutthe...
The trauma that happened thefirst time, the reason I started
drinking and partying and thereason that I just kind of quit
life.
And I've been able to surpassall of those things.
And it's not like it happenedtoday or it happened yesterday
(09:49):
or it happened a year down theroad, right?
It's taken several, severalyears and a lot of counseling.
Last week we talked aboutfinding that safe person to talk
to.
And that is crucial.
You've got to have it.
You've got to dive into theword and you've got to dive into
(10:09):
your prayer and you've got todive into Jesus, but you've also
got to have that human therethat you can, that you can talk
to.
And usually it's better if it'sa stranger, right?
It's easier to open up to astranger than it is to open up
to people that love you orpeople that you feel like are
going to judge you, you know,and that's one of the things.
But when we talk aboutforgiveness, I'll, My sister,
(10:33):
she's four years younger thanme, and my daddy used to think
that if he made her go with me,that I wouldn't do stupid
things.
Well, I would do stupid things,and I would drag her right
along with me.
And when I took a left andstarted getting high and
partying all the time and stuff,she didn't.
(10:55):
She continued to get straightA's, and she continued.
She went to college, and shegot a degree in early education,
and she met the man of herdreams and they got married and
they bought, you know, theybought several houses and
they've, they've always seemedto have their life together.
And I guess it's probably aboutsix months ago.
She calls me up, we're havinglunch and she's like, I read
(11:16):
this study and I didn't realizethat everybody wasn't like me.
And I was like, what are youtalking about?
Smart?
You know?
And she's like, no, she's like,There's like 5% of the
population that don't worryabout things, and I'm one of
those people.
And she goes, and you used tomake me so mad when we were kids
(11:39):
and then when we were adults,because you would be mad about
something or hurt aboutsomething, and then the next day
it was like it didn't happen.
I don't know if that's a goodthing or a bad thing, right?
But that's how I am.
So if I worry about somethingtoday...
When I lay my head down, I giveit to God.
And when I get up the nextmorning, I don't think no more
about it.
Right.
Now the devil or the enemy willwhisper things into my ears
(12:03):
and, you know, make me thinkabout something from two weeks
ago or make me, I'm not sayingthat that doesn't happen because
it does, but you know, you haveto make a decision sometimes.
Right.
And in Matthew 6, 14 and 15, itsays, if you forgive others,
your father will forgive you.
You know, if you forgive othersright so sometimes it's not
(12:27):
about forgiving others sometimesit's about asking for
forgiveness that was where mystory was going so
Speaker 00 (12:34):
you know one of the things that when we talk about
forgiveness that i always cometo me and you talked about this
earlier um you know me and kevinhad a lot We did a lot of
things to each other.
He was very abusive, and wetalked openly about this because
that was in our past.
That's not who we are today.
He's wonderful today, just forthe record.
(12:54):
He is.
But there was a lot of abuse,and there was a lot of fighting,
and there was infidelity onboth parts.
And when he went to prison thelast time, I really just
wanted—I was ready for theworst.
And so when the word— told methat wasn't going to happen.
That's why I prayed about it.
(13:15):
We made the decision, both ofus, that if we were going to
make this work, we were going toforgive each other.
So we both asked forforgiveness, and we both made
the decision that we weren'tgoing to bring up anything that
we had done to each other.
If we were going to make thismarriage work, and God was going
(13:36):
to restore this, I wanted Himto restore it.
Completely.
Only our marriage should bewhole.
And so for me, back in the day,I was a tip or tap person.
You know what I mean?
Oh, yeah.
I'm going to get you back evenmore.
It was very revengeful.
But the Lord took all that.
He literally took all that.
(13:58):
It's amazing, right?
And so that is one thing I'm soproud of, that when we do have
disagreements and we havearguments like people do,
marriage couples do, We don'tbring up our past.
We do not bring up, never onetime in these past four years
since the Lord has restored us,do we bring up anything that has
Speaker 01 (14:20):
happened.
You know, and that right there,that one statement that you
just said, that shows you, tome, in my eyes, the power of
God, right?
Because if you choose, if...
you know, if someone has brokenyour trust, right, that's the
hardest thing to come back from.
(14:41):
And then if you choose to stayin that and you choose to stay
in that marriage, then you haveto make those decisions, right?
Like you can't, you can't belike every time something
happens or every time somebodydoesn't come home on time, you
can't be that way, right?
You can't be, you can't be on,you know, social media and you
(15:02):
can't be you know, lookingthrough their phone and, and
thinking all every time in theback of your head, you know,
and, and that's one of thethings that, you know, I talked
about my daddy last week, right.
And about not, um, trusting,you know, not, uh, when he
doesn't contact me, right.
What's he doing?
(15:22):
What's he up to?
Right.
Uh, you know, and, and that'sone of those, that's one of
those, he's asked forforgiveness, right.
Uh, when we, uh, He wentthrough drug court, and he's
been clean since drug court.
But he went through drug court,and one of the steps in drug
court is the people that he'shurt, he has to bring them in
(15:43):
with his counselor, and he hasto just sit there and listen to
anything and everything we say.
And me and my sister did it,and that was very healing for
me, right?
I have always been a daddy'sgirl, and my daddy...
did no wrong and then when Ifinally seen the wrong that he
was doing or when I finallyunderstood what it means to be a
(16:08):
parent and love your childunconditionally and I'm not
saying my daddy didn't love mebecause he did he loved me the
only way he knew how but youknow just to be able to tell him
you know because my daddytaught me to be the world's
greatest manipulator like Youknow, it's all about what
(16:28):
Shannon wanted and what Shannonneeded.
And, you know, and I learned atan early age how to be the
world's greatest manipulator.
And which now I can't do it tosave my life.
right?
Like I can't, right?
Like now I can't, I try, youknow, sometimes I catch myself
sliding into it or whatever.
(16:49):
And then I feel so guilty.
Like I have to just shut up.
And that's weird for me becausethat's how I've been for, you
know, that was how I was for, Ifeel like half my life, you
know, and, but that's theforgiveness, right?
That's where God has forgivenme for the choices that I've
made.
And, and, and that's that, um,what is it?
(17:09):
That angel that taps on thatshoulder and be like, Hmm, Do
you really want to do that?
And those are hard to deal withsometimes.
But God knows our pain, and Heknows our bitterness, and He
knows how slow and poisonous itcan be.
That's why you have to forgivepeople.
Everybody's like, I can forgivethem, but I'm not going to
(17:29):
forget.
If you truly forgive them, andyou truly give it to God, then
that poison goes away.
And you don't have to thinkabout forgetting it because it
just goes away.
Right?
I mean, that's like what youwere talking about, like your
traumas and things like that,the things in the past.
(17:50):
Once you truly lay it down, andI can't, people just don't
understand that.
And I don't know why they do.
I don't know why they don'tunderstand it.
But once he gives youforgiveness, he'll whisper to
you, you're not doing this forthem.
You're doing this for yourself.
Right?
You're doing this for you.
(18:10):
Because that's how you heal.
Healing has to be the mostimportant part of forgiveness.
You can't forgive because ofthis or can't forgive because of
that.
You have to forgive becauseyou're ready to heal.
I
Speaker 00 (18:27):
think one of my favorite statements is, I choose
to be better, not bitter.
Because bitterness can eat youup.
And I just choose not to feellike that anymore.
Speaker 01 (18:39):
Right.
Speaker 00 (18:40):
And it's a choice.
Speaker 01 (18:41):
It is definitely a choice.
Speaker 00 (18:43):
And I think that we get into this, I think about
this a lot, forgiving people.
I feel like I do that easily.
Probably I'm my worst enemy.
I think that for me, forgivingmyself was harder than anybody
else because...
(19:03):
I had to look at myself in themirror and think all the things
that I've done to my kids and myfamily.
Until I truly, truly forgavemyself, the guilt and the shame
just keeps you in this viciouscycle.
I'm not that person anymore.
That's not who I am.
(19:23):
Forgive me today.
When I truly made thosestatements, it was like a
balloon release.
It goes up in the air and justgoes away.
Speaker 01 (19:33):
Oh, yeah.
It's, you know, you hear peopletalk about this peace that
succumbs all peace, right?
That's what that is.
And I agree.
And, you know, and that's whatI tell everybody who is new
coming out of addiction, right?
They talk about, well, youknow, I need to do this and I
need to do that and I need tofix this and I need to fix that.
(19:54):
First and foremost, you need tofix you.
Speaker 00 (19:57):
Yeah.
Speaker 01 (19:58):
Right.
First and foremost, you can'theal.
You can't fix any relationshipin your past, any relationship
in your forward.
Nothing until you healyourself.
Right.
Until you forgive yourself.
You know, I have I have afriend and she's going through a
lot of things right now.
And, you know, she talked to methis week about it and she said
(20:19):
that she thought she hadforgiven herself.
the people that's in thesituation that she's in.
And she said, when you weretalking about picking the chain
up and playing with it, that'swhat she feels like she's doing
or going through right now.
But she keeps making thisstatement.
Well, I did this because I wantto be a good mom.
(20:41):
Or I did this because I want todo...
And I think what she reallyneeds to do is...
figure out how to forgiveherself.
Right.
And I haven't told her that.
And so she'll, she's going tohear this and cry.
Uh, and I'm sorry.
Um, when she listens to thispodcast, but it just hit me
sitting here.
She needs to forgive herself.
(21:03):
She needs to quit worryingabout forgiving the people that
has hurt her.
And she needs to find how, howto forgive herself first.
Right.
Because you can't, I'm a badmom.
You can't that that's, that'sone of those that you have to
let go of.
Right.
Unknown (21:19):
Um,
Speaker 01 (21:19):
For me,
Speaker 00 (21:20):
it kept me in victim mode until I truly started
forgiving myself.
I'm always the victim for apitiful me.
But then when I come out ofthat, then I can walk in
victory, a victor, not a victim.
And so it changes your wholemindset.
Speaker 01 (21:37):
Right.
I agree.
And there's steps forforgiveness.
There's practical things thatyou can ask for.
There's practical things thatyou can do.
pray for the person, right?
Start with just saying theirname or even if your whispers,
you know, whisper it throughyour tears, start with asking
(21:59):
God to help you forgive them,right?
You know, when you pray,praying and saying their name
and sometimes saying their nameis just as hard, right?
But start with that asking forhelp, right?
I guess the first step way outof addiction is realizing you
got a problem, right?
And the second one is askingfor help.
(22:20):
So, and it's funny howeverything goes back to the
steps that we teach people, thethings that we do, you know,
writing a letter.
That's what I did with mydaddy.
I didn't write the letter, butwhen he asked me to come and
talk with him, I wrote this likefive page thing.
(22:43):
Right.
And, and it had everything thatI'd ever wanted to say and was
too scared to say.
Right.
And I was too scared to behonest with the way I felt
because I was afraid he wouldn'tlove me anymore.
Right.
I was afraid that if I wastruly honest about how the
things he'd done hurt me, thathe wouldn't love me anymore.
(23:06):
Right.
Because he was always one ofthose.
But I did this for you.
And I did that for you.
But that's not what I wanted.
I just wanted you to bepresent.
And you talk about that withOren.
He don't care.
He just wants you to bepresent.
And that's all I wanted.
A lot
Speaker 00 (23:29):
of times people think that forgiving means that
you're weak.
You're not weak.
Forgiving is actually powerful.
Speaker 01 (23:36):
It's so powerful.
Speaker 00 (23:38):
You're definitely not weak.
It shows so much strength.
when you truly forgive aperson.
You know, there was a situationmy dad went through a few years
back with a family member that,you know, as a daughter, you
know, when somebody hurts yourfamily member or whatever, you
know, things happen, you know,you're hurt too.
(23:59):
And so there was a lot ofunforgiveness and my dad had to,
probably it's been, let's see,10 years, I guess, he had the
opportunity to see this personface-to-face as a family member
and ask for forgiveness.
Even though he felt like hewasn't in the wrong, it was the
(24:21):
other person.
Dad needed to do that.
He told me.
It was such a breakthrough forhim.
It encouraged me, too, becauseit was like I had to do that to
move forward.
Right.
He said, and when I did, andthe person didn't even really
accept it, but Dad was so free.
He said it was just like...
A ton of bricks.
(24:42):
You know, this has been a10-year event.
Speaker 01 (24:44):
Right.
Speaker 00 (24:44):
You know what
Speaker 01 (24:44):
I mean?
Well, yeah, and at the end ofthe day, I think that's why you
forgive people, right?
It's to get those bricks off.
It's to take out another linkof the chain, you know, because
I think everything that we gothrough, I think it's one big
chain wrapped around.
I feel like it's one big chainwrapped around us, and it's link
(25:07):
by link, and that's how we doit.
But you have to chooseforgiveness daily, and you have
to set boundaries.
Just because you giveforgiveness, it doesn't mean
that they get access.
And that's some of the traumathings.
I have family that I haven'tseen in years, and it's not that
(25:28):
they did anything to me.
I just can't be around theirlifestyle.
I just can't be a part of thatlifestyle because...
honestly i don't know if icould say no if i went around
and they had you know a joint ora line of a line or something i
don't know i don't know if icould say no and like i said
i've been clean it'll be 23years in july you know and i
(25:51):
don't i don't know i don't knowi choose not to put myself in
those situations um so that idon't have to make that decision
right so um At the end of theday, we just want everyone to
know, no matter what they'regoing through, no matter what's
going on, that you're not alone,that the feelings that you
(26:14):
have, it's not crazy, right?
It's the feelings that youhave.
Sometimes people make you feellike the feelings that you have
are wrong.
If that's how you feel, that'show you feel, right?
And at the end of the day, it'sall that matters is God sees
you.
He heals you and He redeemsyou.
Speaker 00 (26:34):
Yes, He does.
I'm so thankful that we talkedon this today because, you know,
forgiveness is another thing tokeep you free.
You know, you think, well, I'mwalking in freedom.
Are you?
You're holding on to someunforgiveness there, you know?
So sometimes you think, well,I'll forgive everybody.
So I encourage you today to, inyour quiet time, to just ask
(26:59):
the Lord, Lord, is theresomebody in my life That I need
to forgive.
Because there might be placesin your life that you don't even
realize that you haven'tforgave them.
Right.
And that might be a stumblingblock later on down the road.
So I just encourage you in yourquiet time to just get your pen
and paper and write it down.
Right.
Because there's somebody in mylife that I need to forgive or
(27:20):
that I need to ask them toforgive me.
Or it might be yourself.
Speaker 01 (27:24):
Right.
And at the end of the day,that's...
what this is all about, right?
The reason that we do thispodcast, the reason that we are
doing this podcast is so that atthe end of the day, you can
find that freedom.
You know, I had someone ask metoday or the other day, ask me,
(27:44):
why did you start a podcast?
And I was like, because Godtold me to.
And it's not really, I mean,that is why we started one.
But the grace and the peace ofthat I have felt the last six or
seven years of my life, I wanteverybody to feel that peace.
I want everybody to truly walkin that freedom.
(28:06):
I want them to truly find that.
We talk a lot about...
loss or about an empty hole ortrying to fulfill something in
our hearts.
And at the end of the day,that's everything.
That's what we were chasingback in the day.
We were trying to fill a voidsomewhere in our life.
(28:29):
And at the end of the day, theonly thing that ever filled that
void was God.
It was Jesus.
It was the things that...
and I have to be thankful forthe things that I went through
and for the thing, you know,it's made me who I am today.
Um, it's definitely taught methe grace that I have, uh, every
(28:51):
day, you know, and I'm not thebest at it, right?
I'm not the best at givinggrace.
Um, I have my moments.
Uh, we were laughing about itearlier.
Uh, when I print this up, whenI print an outline up of our,
uh, of what we're going to talkabout today, uh, the computer
automatically puts truth onwhere I'm supposed to talk and
(29:12):
put grace where you're supposedto talk.
And everybody was talking abouthow loud I was and how quiet
you were.
And I was like, it's becauseI'm truth and she's grace.
That's just how it is, right?
God brought us together for areason.
And then at the end of the day,that's where we're at.
And I want everyone to takethose steps forward to get where
(29:32):
they need to be.
Yes.
Speaker 00 (29:37):
You need to pray us out?
Yep.
Alright.
God, we thank you for yourmercy.
We ask you that you would teachus to forgive the way that you
do.
Heal every heart listeningright now, losing every chain of
bitterness, resentment, andpain, and give us grace for
today and strength to forgiveagain tomorrow.
(29:58):
Lord, I surrender the weight ofunforgiveness.
Help me release what I can'tcarry.
I trust you with the healing inJesus' name.
Amen.
Speaker 01 (30:07):
Amen.
If this episode stirredsomething in your heart, share
it with someone who might needit.
Follow us at Unrelated SistersPodcast and subscribe for more
truth and grace.
Until next time, keep yourheart safe and your spirit
anchored in love.
Amen.
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