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June 27, 2025 31 mins

WE NEED TO TALK:

Ten years of Pain, India and Learning to Breathe AgainI survived a car accident that deleted my memory and left me with 24/7 chronic pain.


For a decade, I’ve woken up screaming, slept in battles, and moved like every step was war. This isn’t inspiration porn.

This is my raw truth:

🔥 THE PAIN : It lives in my neck, shoulder, back. If I stop moving, it spreads like cancer. I do yoga, gym, running to survive, not to be a health freak.

🔥 THE SLEEPLESS NIGHTS : 3 AM shame. Night terrors without monsters. Years of staring at ceilings while my mind screamed. I fought sleep until I learned to breathe through the cracks.

🔥 INDIA’S WHISPER : When doctors said I’d never be 80% "me" again, a stray dog and the Ganges River taught me: "Your body is a broken temple holding the strength of gods." I didn’t heal my trauma, I healed my relationship with it.

🔥 MOVEMENT = MEDICINE : I walk, lift, and flow not to dominate pain, but to partner with it. To prove my nervous system can still feel safe.


📌Timestamps:

00:00 - My connection with Pain - .Sleep - Not Sleeping - Yoga - Meditation and memories. 


01:17 - How my brain protected me by deleting the memory of my accident. The body keeps score though, the pain never went away. 


03:12 - lets talk about the pain first. The pain never went away. I live with it, I talk with it, I try to sleep with it. And I’m making this podcast with it. I need to work with my pain, do yoga, bodywork, walking, going to the gym. I do these thing because if I stop the pain gets worst. 


05:42 - Sleeping was Hell. Not sleeping didn’t help. Healing happens when the body rests. 


07:21 - Nobody told be about the nights. Stealing staring is an agony. The mind raged on. And the Night terrors omg they were so scary.


09:13 - When a new day started I would smile like everything was fine, even if I hadn’t slept for days. Felt like nothing worked to sleep. Why wasn’t I normal and just fall a sleep.


10:22 - Healing isn’t just a daytime job, I fought lots of battles at 4 AM in my bed. I had to stop fighting to sleep, and focus on my breath. I had to find my reconnection with sleep.


11:45 - How one Call with “World Peace Yoga School & Guru Vishnu” changed and saved me. He was my last hope. How my son’s wisdom truly made me go to India. Reconnecting with my body, fighting through my pain. I started to love my body again.


16:23 - The Healing of nature especially the healing power of the Ganges River vs doing my 108 dips. The wisdom of Guru Vishnu helped me so much.


18:25 - Day 30 in India I connected with a dog called “ Brahma” just his presence helped me connect to myself and not overthink and give into my ego-mindset and broken brain.  


20:55 - Some animals are healers ever if they don’t heal you - the show you and remind you on how to heal yourself. 


22:10 - I went to India to heal my body and my brain & I learned to heal my relationship with them. 


24:02 - How movement became my medicine. How I went from every step hurting to feeling how pain is not my enemy anymore. Not fixing - I’m healing, and feeling great full even for my pain.


26:26 - My breakthrough weren’t movie like breakthrough. They were not Ahhhahh moments. They were ugly, painful quit and brutally honest. Showing up that made the difference. 


28:07 - Knowing that my healing isn’t about becoming who I was, it;’s about building a relationship with who I am now. I’m safe in the here and now. 


29:50 - Please take your story back, rewrite your book as your new you..


Join the conversation: #RealTalkUnfiltered #TBIWarrior #InvisibleBattles #Healing #India  #YogaHealing 

To anyone fighting silent battles: 

You are not your trauma. 

Not your worst day. 

You're the space where healing happens.


! Disclaimer: I'm not a medical professional.


This is all my personal experience.

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