Believe First: Trusting Lived Experience Over Comfort Bias

In this episode, Karen and Jonelle step into the awkward pause that follows the question, “Are you sure?” They dissect why white women often doubt a friend’s painful account, tracing the habit to quick-fire heuristics. Proximity bias trusts stories that sound like our own. Authority bias treats doctors, pastors, and headlines as default truth. Comfort bias protects the worldview we already like. The hosts introduce philosopher Miranda Fricker’s idea of epistemic injustice to show how these reflexes silence Black, disabled, and trans voices in courts, hospitals, and boardrooms. Through personal confessions—including Karen’s admission of writing off a friend’s trauma—they model how to swap skepticism for solidarity. The conversation challenges listeners to spot those dismissive phrases in real time, notice the body’s defensive tightening, and practice believing storytellers first. Trust, they argue, is a muscle that grows only with intentional, repeated use, and makes space for healing, accountability, and shared imagination.

Calls to Action

• Lead with belief. When someone shares a personal story, replace “Are you sure?” with “Thank you for trusting me—I believe you.”
• Keep a bias journal. For one week, note every moment you instinctively question a person’s account. Write down what triggered your doubt, then practice a response that centers belief and curiosity instead.
• Host a listening circle. Gather two friends, give each person five minutes to tell a lived experience without interruption, and end with an affirmation—not analysis.

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