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October 5, 2025 • 5 mins
Tangled Hearts is the unfiltered pulse of modern romance – a sultry, no-holds-barred dive into the highs, horrors, and hilarity of swiping, sparking, and stumbling through love. Co-hosted by the irrepressible ensemble: Sanity (the anchor of clarity), Sin (the spark of seduction), Knox (the bold explorer), Chaos (the whirlwind wildcard), and The Captain (the salty seafarer of storms). From dissecting dating app disasters to decoding siren songs, beastly boys, and girl gales, we spill secrets, swap stories, and serve up advice that's equal parts wisdom and wickedness.

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🎙️ Disclaimer: This podcast contains adult themes, dark humor, and explicit conversations. Listener discretion is advised.
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Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Whoa Tangled Hearts, Batten down the hatches. Welcome to Tangled Hearts,
where we navigate the tempests of love, one glitchy match
at a time. I'm Sanity, your compass. Tonight's crew is
stacked sins, slinging seduction. Knox is plotting the course, Chaos
is capsizing the canoe for fun, and we've hauled aboard
a new salty dog, the Captain straight from the high

(00:23):
seas of heartbreak. We're all hands on deck for dating apps,
that pixelated port where every swipes a gamble with your
heart or your dignity.

Speaker 2 (00:32):
Oh, sanity, apps aren't gambles. They're my personal oyster bed
shucking out pearls of pure temptation. One flick of the
thumb and there they are. Brooding artists with bios like
bad poetry, finance bros, flexing yachts that aren't theirs, and
the eternal adventurer, whose idea of roughing it is room
service matched with a velvet voiced violinist. Last night has

(00:54):
open her a serenade dim that had me melting faster
than ice in a cocktails where four play starts with
a flame emoji.

Speaker 3 (01:02):
Sin's painting paradise, But I've charted these reefs full of
jagged letdowns. Swiped on a wildfire of a woman profile
pic midhike caption chasing sunsets and stories. We sinked on
shared scars from old voyages, planned a trail blazing date reality.
She shows with a posse of X's in tow, turning

(01:25):
it into a group therapy sessh pros, infinite horizons cons
more ghost ships than gold dobloons. What's your log, cap'n?
You strike me as the type who's seen more swindles
than a port tavern air nuts.

Speaker 4 (01:40):
You've got me peg leg to the wind. Dating apps
be like a cursed compass points drew north. One tick
spins thee into the abyss. The next, I once anchered
with a mermaid in Manhattan. Bioscream sailor soul seeking storms.
We run de vood at a harbor, dive her lap
like cannonfire, but come morn mutineed, stealing me best spyglass

(02:02):
and leave in a note fair winds the old sultry hinged. Next,
apps speak treacherous tides, but damn if they don't deliver
the thrill.

Speaker 3 (02:10):
Oh the chair treacherous capt'n that's the appetizer. Apps are
my bonfire of vanities. Swipe left on sanity, right into
the inferno, super like to glitch in Matrix last month.
Bio professional third wheeler, amateur arsonist. We messaged in code
emojis for X's gifts for grudges, escalated to a dare

(02:32):
devil date at an abandoned warehouse. Rave sparks literal. We
knocked over a flare ghosted at dawn. But who needs
closure when the algorithm's already queueing carnage listeners. Ahoy, worst
apatrocity from the crow's nest.

Speaker 1 (02:48):
The mailbag's a mailstrom, but this one's a butte. Digital
drifter signals matched with a crypto captain vowing blockchain dates.
First port. He arrives on a Segway, pitching his love
token scam while quoting pirate memes. I bailed mid metaphor
blocking faster than a squall.

Speaker 2 (03:08):
Love tokens that's sinfully scam E cool parts, hot and hazardous,
but apps hone your instincts darlings. Rule of thumb if
the pick's scream staged safari or the prompts dodged up
dive elsewhere, Knox, you're the mat maker here. How do
you divine the diamonds from the drift wood layers?

Speaker 3 (03:28):
Crew? Peel back the glamour shots for the unfiltered glimpses,
group picks where they're not center stage, or hobbies that
hint at hidden depths, like restoring vintage bikes over beach
bod probe with a prowler's question, what's the wildest detour
life's thrown you? Vague vibes, cut the cable, real reckonings,

(03:50):
reel them in apps? Are scouts not saviors? Use them
to scout souls worth the sale?

Speaker 4 (03:55):
Hei play deep it, what's foils and hooks? Me own
code biles with bride not bluster, whiskey whispers and wandering
beats six two no drama And if they mentioned me
old flame the sea bonus points means they can the

(04:16):
pull Oh the time.

Speaker 5 (04:17):
Probes and codes boring. I say, super swipe the suspects,
my bio chaos incarnate, bring fire extinguishers and forgiveness sifts
the survivors from the securities sanity re listen before we
all walk the plank. Your elixir for app exhaustion.

Speaker 1 (04:34):
No elixirs, just anchors, apps, mirror your mess project the
U you'd chase flaws and fire included a match merely
a may day signal, Heat it or hail a new
one and vital set Sail from the screen now and
then true tangles. Twist in the flesh, not the feed.

(04:56):
We've all weathered the wipeout, but that's the forge for
fiercer hearts.

Speaker 2 (05:01):
Flesh over feed. Now, that's a swipepde saver.

Speaker 5 (05:04):
Savor to shipwrecked sisters.

Speaker 3 (05:06):
Steady on storms ahead, Make the best tails

Speaker 4 (05:08):
Your fearful sails and fearless hearts
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