October 8, 2025 • 63 mins
What happens when you refuse to succumb to your circumstances and instead choose to reinvent and rise in glory?
Dr. Naeema Olatunji’s story moves from childhood secrets to healing, heartbreak, and a cycling accident that became a divine disruption. A chiropractor, reinvention coach, and author of Raised as a Lie, Naeema shows how the hardest moments can reveal who we truly are—and what’s possible next.
In this conversation we explore:
- The hidden truth that reshaped Naeema’s identity and future
- How she transformed pain, divorce, and loss into purpose
- What it means to heal from the inside out—body, mind, and spirit
- How disruption can become divine direction
- The power of surrender, travel, and rediscovery
✨ Resources Mentioned
Download her free Before the RISE mini journal: https://www.everydamnthing.org/s/Before-the-Rise-Journal-t9h8.pdf
Connect with Naeema:
DrNaeema.com
Instagram & Facebook @DrNaeema
https://www.linkedin.com/in/dr-naeema-olatunji/
Books: Raised as a Lie, coming soon:Your Possibility Era , and Every Damn Thing – Your Disruption Manual
Subscribe to Your Next Success so you never miss an episode.
Watch full video episodes on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@NextSuccessMethod/
Learn more about Next Success www.nextsuccesscareers.com
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:03):
What happens when you refuse tosuccumb to your circumstances
and instead choose to reinventand rise in glory?
That is the story of Dr.
Naeema Olatunji from a secretimposed on her in childhood to
seasons of healing, fromheartbreak to a disruption that
unlocked new possibility, herjourney is a living example of
(00:28):
resilience, courage, andexpansion.
This episode is for anyone who'sever felt stuck in the roles or
stories handed to them yet cansense the possibility of
something greater.
Caroline (00:44):
This is the Your Next Success podcast, and I'm your
host, Dr.
Caroline Sangal.
I'm a life first career coachand strategist on a mission to
normalize questioning yourcareer because I believe each of
us is made on purpose for apurpose only we can fulfill.
The longer we live out ofalignment with who we are, what
(01:06):
we do best, and why we're here,the more we miss out.
And the more the world missesout on what only we can give.
The Your Next Success Podcast iswhere we explore how to build a
career that truly fuels yourlife.
We talk about self-discovery,smart job, search strategies,
(01:26):
professional growth, and you'llhear stories from people who've
navigated big career transitionsthemselves so you can see what
it's really like to make boldchanges and feel inspired to
create your own version ofauthentic success, one that is
aligned, meaningful, and trulyyours.
(01:50):
Dr.
Naeema Olatunji is a reinventioncoach, speaker, and an author of
Raised as a Lie.
Her story begins with achildhood wrapped in secrets.
Truths, unspoken yet felt inevery room.
Even then, she carried visionsof a bigger life.
Over the years, she created newpaths, built a thriving healing
(02:14):
practice, and raised her familywith intention, then came
heartbreak and a cyclingaccident that changed everything
instead of shrinking.
Dr.
Naeema embraced the disruption,sold nearly everything, and
traveled through 13 countriesdiscovering new layers of who
(02:34):
she is and the life she wasmeant to live.
Today she radiates joy,possibility, and expansion.
She coaches women over 40 toreclaim their power, rewrite
their stories, and rise intobold lives of purpose and
freedom.
Alongside her memoir, she iswriting two new books, Your
(02:58):
Possibility Era, and Every DamnThing, Your Disruption Manual.
In this episode you'll find thehidden truth that reshaped
Naeema's identity and future,the turning points that open her
path to healing and reinvention,how she embodies joy,
possibility, and expansionthrough disruption.
(03:21):
Her vision of authentic successand a glimpse into her upcoming
books.
Welcome Dr.
Naeema to Your Next Success.
I am thrilled to be having thisconversation with you this
morning and I know it's gonna besuch a delight and our listeners
are going to love it and lovethe beautiful person that you
(03:41):
are.
Dr. Naeema (03:42):
Thank you.
It is such an honor to be here.
I'm excited about what is goingto come of this conversation.
Caroline (03:49):
Yeah, I'm not exactly sure where we're gonna go, but I
know it's gonna be amazing.
So thank you.
Thank you.
I would love to start I knowthat you're super successful.
And you help people a lotthrough transitions,
particularly women over 40.
So that's where we're gonna getto.
But I'd love to dial it way,way, way back.
(04:14):
Can you share a little bit ofthe beginning parts of your
story, particularly yourchildhood, and in those days,
what did you think you wanted todo, with your life and your
career?
Dr. Naeema (04:31):
You know, it's so interesting that you asked this
because I just had thisconversation with a good friend
not that long ago.
And what we were talking aboutis like some of our earliest
memories and how far back canyou remember, and what was the
feeling tone of those memories?
(04:53):
And for anybody who has not readmy memoir, Raised as a Lie, my
life begins on a farm, in ruralUtah, and I remember being out
in the fields and, you know, outon the land, and there was a lot
of time to just play and explorejust really safe.
(05:16):
And I grew to just love, love,love, love nature.
And I spent a lot of time aloneoutside, alone with farm animals
because we lived on a farm and
Caroline (05:27):
kind of animals?
What, what?
Dr. Naeema (05:29):
Everything.
So it was a traditional farm, sothere were horses, cows,
chickens, geese.
There was, so this is, you know,rural, very white Utah.
And I say that to say that Ithink this is so funny.
One of the games that would beplayed is when it was time for,
(05:56):
like entertainment.
Saturday night, fun, fun, wouldbe chopping the heads off of
chickens and seeing how far theywould run down the road.
Caroline (06:05):
Oh my goodness.
Oh my goodness.
Dr. Naeema (06:07):
Who does
Caroline (06:08):
Well,
Dr. Naeema (06:08):
Farmers are
Caroline (06:09):
farmers do that and if that was your, you know,
environment that you were in themidst of, you probably didn't
even question it.
'Cause that's just whathappened.
yeah.
Dr. Naeema (06:21):
I mean, the chicken's head was gonna have to
come off one way or another.
And it wasn't until, you know,fast forward into relocating and
living in city life that I waslike, wow, that's a different
type of entertainment.
And so the farm was really justthis symbol for me of like how
(06:42):
far out in nature could I go?
Because there was
Caroline (06:44):
Okay.
Dr. Naeema (06:45):
a lot of very tumultuous things that were
happening inside the home, butout in nature, especially with
animals.
My very favorite animal on thefarm was my horse, and his name
was Jughead.
And he was this very, very old,like Palomino that he was super
gentle and he didn't move arounda lot, and my mother could trust
(07:07):
him.
And I started riding when I wastwo.
And
Caroline (07:10):
Oh wow.
My
Dr. Naeema (07:11):
earliest memories are some of the pleasant ones
are me being out in the fieldsand just talking to Jughead and
just walking around.
I had this sense that I couldnot describe, but in talking to
my friend earlier last week, itwas really this sense that my
(07:35):
life was going to be so big andI was going to have such an
expansive reach.
And I saw these images of myselfstanding on stages and speaking
to tens of thousands of women.
And I was like, and you know,when you're four.
Caroline (07:58):
Yeah.
Dr. Naeema (07:59):
have a place for this.
And so I remember like thesevisions and this feeling tone of
just really feeling joyful.
and then, you know, you spend alot of your years growing up
forgetting those memories.
And what I am a true believerin, is that we once upon a time
(08:19):
before we ever took our firstbreath, as we sat with God and
co-created the life that we weregoing to live and the lessons
that we were gonna come upagainst and how we were gonna
grow and expand, and to thedegree that I think that life
life's, we can easily forgetthose visions.
(08:41):
And so it's nice to revisit themand re-remember and then sort of
connect the dots, like wherethose moments have really come
to fruition.
Caroline (08:54):
Absolutely, because I think we go through a period of
learning and experiencing andthen unlearning and re sorting
and reshifting.
Okay.
So sounds like some of yourearliest memories were within
this beauty of nature and thefarm and connecting with such a
beautiful creature on a soullevel, even though you couldn't
(09:15):
communicate outwardly thatpeople would see and expect.
And then what happened?
Because I know a bit of yourstory has a whole big deep ball
of fun now.
Dr. Naeema (09:28):
that.
I like
Caroline (09:29):
Yeah, yeah.
So you're on this farm, you'rehaving these experiences that
are in many, many waysbeautiful.
And this escape out to natureand to the beauty outside the
home is giving you just a pieceand visions of a grand future.
And then what happened when youwent to school?
(09:51):
Were there certain subjects thatyou particularly were drawn to
or tell us a little bit aboutthat.
Dr. Naeema (09:58):
That's interesting.
So I'm the little brown girl whowas raised in an all white
family and went to all whiteschools.
And when we moved away from therural farm in Utah, lived in
California and we lived in allwhite communities and my family
was perpetuating a lie that mymother had started and that was
(10:22):
that I too was white.
And for anybody who was watchingthis video, never one day, never
1, 1, 1 day were these curlsever blonde, straight, and never
were my eyes blue-eyed.
And that's what my family lookedlike, right?
My siblings were blonde hair,blue eyed, and the man who was
on my birth certificate alsoblonde hair, blue eyed.
(10:43):
And so I grew up always knowing,you know, I had this
conversation actually yesterdaywith somebody who read my book
and yesterday was the very firsttime we actually met in person.
We share a friend in common.
And so she said, I just didn'tunderstand how could you not
(11:05):
have known?
And the thing is, is that Ididn't not know that I didn't
look like anybody, and I speak alot about that in the beginning
of the book.
I was always aware, and I had anolder sister who was going
through her own trauma andturmoil, who was laser focused
(11:25):
at reminding me at everyopportunity that I not only did
not look like anybody, but Ididn't fit in and I was not
wanted.
And so there was this vastdifference of my experience of
being out in nature and it beinga place of peace and
connectivity and being insidethe home where there was a lot
(11:48):
of turmoil.
And unfortunately, my mother wasmarried to a very violent,
alcoholic.
And so those two realities werevastly contrasted in how they
showed up.
And when she finally had thecourage to leave and we
relocated and came to SouthernCalifornia.
The perpetuation of me beingothered and on the outside
(12:12):
always existed.
My family loved me dearly.
And they were a typical Italianfamily that was extremely
racist.
And so there was this bigelephant that sat in the middle
of the room and that was me.
But nobody ever talked about it.
(12:33):
Nobody ever spoke.
Never one word about this veryobvious elephant that everybody
had to move around and becareful not to, you know,
interact and engage and reallyhave this deep conversation that
was right there present.
And it wasn't until I was 18,and so I say that I found out
(12:57):
the truth.
And so I say all that to saythat my growing up, my
adolescence, my experience, evenin the classrooms and all the
many schools, because we movedaround quite a bit, It weren't
centered around me falling inlove with learning because I
didn't and I wasn't.
I always felt on the outside andI had a lot of angst about being
(13:25):
in close proximity to otherkids.
They weren't nice and theyweren't kind.
And I didn't make, you know,friends.
And it wasn't until I was inhigh school where I had actually
developed some friends and westayed stationary for a little
while, but it was always.
I was the little chocolate dropin the middle of a sea that
(13:48):
folks that didn't look like me.
And so I say that to say that,you know, I didn't gain a love
for knowledge and reallydeveloping our intellect until
college, until I really sort ofdove into the things that I
wanted to study.
(14:09):
And I enjoyed it later on.
But in the beginning, not toomuch.
Caroline (14:15):
So around the time when you were 18, you finally
got a bit of confirmation ofwhat your inner knowing was
trying to tell you and your momadmits to you.
Well, actually, this is such animportant part of your story
though, and it's terrifying andbeautiful what came afterward.
(14:38):
But would you mind sharing whatprompted this revelation from
your mother?
Yeah,
Dr. Naeema (14:49):
yeah,
Caroline (14:49):
yeah.
Dr. Naeema (14:50):
So he had moved to a really small town in Arizona.
The town boasted of its onestoplight.
And
Caroline (14:58):
Hmm.
While
Dr. Naeema (14:59):
we had lived in other places that were rural, it
was, we lived on a farm.
And so this was a very differentexperience because it was a
small town, but people lived inpretty close proximity.
There was zero diversity in thislittle tiny town.
And I was a senior in highschool.
We moved right before a coupleweeks before school started my
(15:20):
senior year.
Caroline (15:21):
Oh wow.
Dr. Naeema (15:21):
And I was expecting the same as always.
By that point, I think I hadmaybe, I think there was like
maybe four or five elementaryschools, one middle school and
three high schools.
Right?
So I had been very familiarizedwith being the new kid and
(15:45):
always being on the outside.
And that was not new to me and Iwas not expecting anything other
than being the new kid and beingsort of shunned or on the
outside or having all thoseawkward or, you know, moments
of,
Caroline (15:59):
Yeah.
can
Dr. Naeema (15:59):
I sit here and, and really just not being accepted.
But this high school was verydifferent and I not only felt
othered and not really desiredto be included, but there was an
animosity that I couldn't put myfinger on because I really
(16:20):
hadn't experienced that before.
There was sort of anindifference or maybe like, who
are you?
And sort of, you know,
Caroline (16:28):
Hmm.
Dr. Naeema (16:28):
turning away from me, but not this level of
aggressive intolerance and I gotcornered one day.
This was a highly second monthinto school, and a couple of the
senior boys had cornered me inthe cafeteria because I used to
(16:50):
try to get there.
I used to try to make an excuseto get outta class so I could
get into the cafeteria, get thefood, and find a table so there
wouldn't be then like, Hmm, canI sit at your table?
Sort of moment.
I tried to avoid that to juststay by myself and these boys
cornered me and they were veryaggressive football, you know,
big corn fed looking dudes, andthey threatened to take me out.
(17:13):
We lived in the desert and sothe kids, the high school kids
would go really far out into thedesert and they would build
these bonfires and drink and dowhatever.
Stupid things that highschoolers do, and they
threatened to take me out thereand lynch me.
And I didn't know what lynchingmeant.
I had had a very whitewashededucation and I didn't know what
(17:37):
lynching meant.
I knew it wasn't good, and Iknew enough to be afraid.
And I left and I went home and Icalled my older sister who
didn't live with us anymore, andwe were not close, but I did not
know who else to ask.
And I called her and I said, Imade her promise, Don't tell
(17:58):
mom.
I really had been aself-appointed protector of my
mother since the violent years,and she never asked me to, but I
did a very good job of trying tobuffer her from anything.
Caroline (18:11):
Hmm.
Dr. Naeema (18:11):
And I didn't want her to be burdened with my
turmoil.
And my sister did exactly whatany loving person would do for
another.
She did tell my mom, and my momwas afraid for my safety.
And in that moment she had
Caroline (18:29):
Hmm.
Dr. Naeema (18:30):
to reveal that the man on my birth certificate,
this nice blonde-haired,blue-eyed man that when he
drank, became an awful humanbeing, was not my biological
father.
And when she revealed that mybiological father was black and
I knew that my family, have beenracist for all of this time.
(18:54):
There was a sense of ah, like ofcourse, right?
But also there was this internalconflict of what does that mean?
If my family doesn't love blackpeople, can they still love me?
And that sort of sent me down abig spiral.
But also, in time, it encouragedand inspired me to really dig
(19:21):
in.
And when I figured out here Iam, I'm 19 at this point, then I
fully embrace this.
And I was like, the worlddoesn't see me as this white
woman.
They just don't.
And so what would it be if Ijust fully embraced who I am and
how the world sees me?
(19:43):
And I decided when I went tocollege, to the University of
Southern California that I wasgoing to make up for lost time
as I thought, and
Caroline (19:51):
Oh.
I
Dr. Naeema (19:52):
became blackety black.
So I turned this very sort oflike heavy, what felt
burdensome, revelation into howcan it empower me?
And it was freeing andliberating in a way that I just
(20:12):
hadn't imagined and it was abeautiful experience, a bit
tumultuous at times as well.
Caroline (20:22):
Okay.
There's so much that could, thatcould be said.
Firstly, thank you for sharingthat part of your story.
That had to be absolutely, Therejust are no words.
Terrifying is not a good, youknow, disappointing,
heartbreaking.
I don't think there's a wordthat exists to capture the
(20:44):
experience that you went throughand I'm so, so sorry that those
children didn't see the amazing,beautiful, but it wasn't for
them, right?
Like rejection is God'sprotection.
Jamie Kern Lima, who says that.
So you have this freeingexperience around 18.
See, I study career careers andcareer transitions.
(21:05):
And there are many timesthroughout somebody's lives that
we go through this questioningof, is this really what I wanna
do?
You know, who am I?
What do I wanna become?
And around 18 is one of thefirst ones.
So you have this now lookingback, a bit liberating moment of
there is more to you.
(21:25):
You are so beautiful while alsothen getting to leave and become
in college.
And so when you were going toget to the University of
Southern California, what didyou choose to study?
Now that you got to make allyour own choices and you're
realizing even more the beautyof who you are.
Dr. Naeema (21:48):
I originally went as a poli sci major because I was
going to be an attorney and Iloved the idea, I was gonna
finish at USC go to NYU, I wasgonna study law and I was gonna
join one of the corporate globalpractices and really just
(22:08):
embrace this idealized life ofan attorney.
And then I attended
Caroline (22:19):
Yeah.
Dr. Naeema (22:20):
course called The Awake Lecture Series and it blew
my mind.
And it was an awakening ofconsciousness for black people
to realize that we did not comefrom enslaved humans.
(22:41):
We were not the regrettablehumans that lived in this
country, but that we hailed fromthe original people, and I was
floored.
There was this expansion that Inever imagined was even
(23:03):
possible.
And so when that revelationhappened, and the only reason it
could have happened is becauseof that terrible thing that
happens in high school.
And so these realizations thatas life is unfolding, it is
happening for you.
And so seeing is this unfoldmentof life happening for me, and
(23:30):
what I did was turned everythingupside down.
And I went to the board,essentially it was through a lot
of meetings, college advisor,and I just had to keep, you
know, escalating my requestsbecause there was no division of
USC that had any level of ethnicstudies on any level, save the
(23:55):
Holocaust classes that theyoffered, the Jewish Holocaust
classes that they offered inliterature outside of that it
didn't exist.
And this was in 1992.
So you have to remember, this isalso on the heels of the
uprising after the Rodney King
Caroline (24:13):
Yeah.
Dr. Naeema (24:14):
verdict for the police officers who were
acquitted.
And so there's this uprising inLA.
The city is on fire and there isthis beckoning that we cannot
return once we came with this unacknowledgement, I think I just
made up that word.
(24:34):
and just disregard of, you know,what was the contribution of
Africans in this world and, andhow are we showing up in this
particular country?
And so all of this awakening ishappening at this time.
And I am feeling called to makea difference and wanting to
(24:58):
desperately be a beneficialpresence on the planet.
And I could not see in the legalsystem that would acquit these
men who clearly committed thisheinous crime that I could
participate in it.
I never, for once consideredcivil rights, being a civil
rights attorney and had I, Iwould've made a different
(25:19):
choice, but I turned it allupside down, escalated as far as
I could up to the board of USCand demanded that I be able to
study what I wanted to studywhich was African American
history.
They granted me the opportunityto make my major called Ethnic
(25:40):
Studies.
And so, because they had nocurriculum in place, no
structure, there was no strategyaround it.
I just essentially went aroundto the university, found all the
black professors, and I waslike, I wanna take your class.
Now there weren't that many andthere was only 3 percent of
black students on campus, but I
Caroline (25:59):
Yeah.
I looked it up yesterday.
I was like, yeah, I'm thinking,how did this work out?
Because I don't know that thatwas a very diverse campus and
diverse school, but here you aretrying to understand even more
of who you are.
And this was the environmentyou're in.
So now you're gonna bloom whereyou're planted.
That's amazing.
I did not know this part.
(26:20):
I'm seeing themes here though.
Like, so there's one theme ofyou had this desire even to
maybe draw you into thinkingabout law.
There's an underpinning of rightand wrong and justice and
letting the truth prevail.
That's the holistic ideal,right?
And then the reality of, oh,that's not actually what we see.
(26:42):
And then your desire even moreof where did I come from?
What are the beautiful historiesof all those who came before me
and how can I take it and exceland, and move forward?
So you make your own version ofyour major.
You study what comes to you andthen what happened?
Because I'm not clear on gettingto USC, going and finding your
(27:04):
major and then finding yourselfX time from now, marrying
somebody, having multiplechildren.
And then so what happened inbetween there?
What happened in, how did thatall unfold?
Dr. Naeema (27:20):
I actually met my husband, then husband at The
Awake Lecture Series at
Caroline (27:27):
Oh,
Dr. Naeema (27:29):
I just thought we were gonna be friends.
And I had found out actually onour first date that he leaned
over to his best friend when Iwalked in the room and he said,
that's the woman I'm gonnamarry.
And he tells me this on ourfirst date.
And I was like, boy, you
Caroline (27:45):
that's too much.
Dr. Naeema (27:45):
are out of your mind.
Caroline (27:46):
Yeah.
Dr. Naeema (27:47):
I am not getting married.
Caroline (27:49):
Yeah.
Dr. Naeema (27:50):
I mean, I was too busy enjoying myself and my
freedom and you know, being a23-year-old and just fully for
the first time stepping into whoI was
Caroline (28:02):
Yeah.
maybe with that viewpoint backin the day of the marriage that
you saw was scary.
Dr. Naeema (28:11):
Well, not only did I think about like what does it
mean to be in partnership.
My mother, after she divorcedthe man on my birth certificate,
my mother was, I think herpicker got really good.
(28:31):
'cause before it wasn't good.
And she met and married mystepfather, who we all called
dad.
So I was in third grade and hewas probably one of the greatest
human beings I've ever had theblessing to know, to know Art
was to know that you saw God.
(28:54):
He was gentle and kind andcompassionate and generous to a
fault.
He take his shirt off to wrapnicely up his last dollar and
hand it to you and bless you.
And make sure that you werelaughing as you walked along
your merry way.
(29:14):
Just an incredible human being.
And we got blessed to have himin our life until he shuffled
off of the mortal coil rightbefore I turned 40.
And so he had a chance to loveand embrace and be this
incredible grandfather to mythree children and father-in-law
to my husband.
(29:35):
And it was such a blessing.
So I had this experience ofknowing what it was to be such a
great man, but I was 23 and Iwas uninterested in being
married.
And you know, they say when youmeet a man who was very clear
about what it is that hedesires, watch out.
Caroline (29:57):
Yeah.
Dr. Naeema (29:58):
'Cause we were married 6 months later and
experiencing becoming parentsand really just embracing this
African centered lifestyle.
So all three of our childrenwere born at home with a
midwife.
They all bear African names thathave meanings.
(30:18):
We chose the meanings before theactual name, and we did not name
them until observing an Africantradition until they arrive
here.
And we did not reveal the nameuntil seven days after they came
because it's time to meet thislittle spirit and know who they
are and really just get to knowthis being that is coming
(30:43):
through you, but not for you.
Right?
And how
Caroline (30:46):
Absolutely.
Dr. Naeema (30:46):
you know, desire for them to live in the world.
And so we live this verycentered lifestyle.
And so what I think also is athing, to go back to what you
said is what I have been doingmy entire life has been
reinventing.
So it is no strange, you know,coincidence, if you will.
That I am a reinvention coachnow, you know?
(31:06):
because I think that that's thething, that you really observe
that something you said earlierthat the thing that I became
really good at is blooming whereI was planted.
But more than that, I think thatmy stepfather that we call dad
really taught and instilled inme, is you don't only bloom
(31:27):
because how you bloom isevidenced in the people that you
are closest to.
Like, how do you bless otherpeople that you don't only look
for self gratification, but themeaning and the purpose in your
life really is demonstrated inhow you serve.
And that really has been also areal central theme for me.
(31:51):
I mean, I went through myselfish years.
Don't get it twisted.
my
Caroline (31:55):
We, we,
Dr. Naeema (31:57):
that is
Caroline (31:57):
That's a whole nother episode.
(32:40):
I wanna bring it a little bit tothis, the beauty of a name and
seeing the child and whatthey're becoming and choosing
the right name and having thatmeaning.
I was very intentional with mychildren and their names.
My husband is originally fromIndia, and I wanted to have
(33:01):
names that were beautiful andthat my side of the family could
try to pronounce nicely, andthat meant something deep.
And yet also were notcontradictory with my faith and
my traditions because they'redifferent than my husband's
faith and his traditions.
Would you mind sharing, when didyou become this beautiful name
(33:22):
of Naeema?
Dr. Naeema (33:25):
I think that I always knew I was born given my
grandmother's name, my mother'smother, who was just this, she
was a really soul who had areally, really hard life and she
(33:45):
did the best that she could withwhat she was given.
And she was an incredible humanand I was honored that I was
given her name, I was given hername as a second thought.
My mom knew she was having aboy.
Never imagined she was having agirl.
(34:06):
And when I came out as a girl, Ithink that she was very shocked.
And so there was no girl name,and it became the default like.
And while it is honorablebecause she was such a beautiful
human, it never fit, ever.
(34:31):
And I could stare into mygrandmother's blue eyes until
there were no more sunsets andit would never have fit.
It was always the thing that Iwas wearing, but never truly
inhabiting.
And so when my husband and Iwere married, one of the things
(34:52):
that we decided is that we weregoing to give each other our
given chosen name
Caroline (35:01):
Oh, so beautiful.
Dr. Naeema (35:03):
we were going to change our names, and so he gave
me my name.
We were supposed to just dofirst, but I'm an overachiever,
so I gave him his first andmiddle name, and when I heard
the name standing facing him, itwas this revelation and I get
(35:23):
goosebumps to this day, liketelling this story.
I knew that he understood and hesaw me for the very first time I
felt seen.
And so here I am, I'm 24, andfor the very first time in my
life, I know that the energythat is called, right, every
(35:49):
word has energy.
The energy that is evoked everytime my name will be uttered
will be something that I couldtruly embody.
And that was a reflection of whoI am and how I want to show up
and who I aspire to be and towhom I belong.
(36:12):
And so it was this beautifulmoment.
And so he told me the meaningbefore the name.
And it transcends manylanguages, like many words.
But it is kindhearted andcompassionate in Hebrew, it's
the God of all good things.
It's the things that peopleremind you of when you forget
(36:32):
to, you know, when you have atemporary lapse.
It's when you're being human andless spiritual.
and so to be compassionate andkindhearted and a beneficial
presence on the planet to embodythose descriptions and to know
that that's where my heartresides.
(36:53):
And then when he finally said,Naeema.
I had to giggle'cause it's thename of the song that he would
play over and over when I waspregnant.
And we would put, my belly nextto these big giant speakers.
cause it was the early nineties.
Caroline (37:10):
Yeah.
Yeah.
So
Dr. Naeema (37:11):
that, you know, our unborn son could listen to the
beautiful sounds of JohnColtrane.
And he wrote this ballad.
my then husband was a huge fanof jazz and I became to love it
because of him.
And so John Coltrane, this verysoulful jazz musician that was a
(37:33):
horn player far before his time,wrote this ballad to his wife
called Naeema.
And it was such a beautifulmoment.
Caroline (37:44):
Oh, thank you so much for sharing that.
And he saw you, he loved youeven from the first moment of
seeing you if he's, you know,whispering over to his friend
that he's gonna marry you, andof course you weren't quite sure
of that plan yet.
But then you became and had aquite a great brought in three
beautiful children into theworld.
How did that change yourtrajectory from what you thought
(38:08):
you wanted to do?
Work-wise to then becoming awife, becoming a mother.
What did you choose to do inthat?
What did you feel called to doafter having your children?
Dr. Naeema (38:21):
My experience with having my children at home with
the midwife, the very first oneI was like, this is it.
This is what I wanna do.
I want to empower other women tobirth in a way that they choose,
not in the way that, you know, amedical provider chooses, not in
a way that is, orchestrated by abuilding of sick people that are
(38:48):
being treated, in a medicalmodel, which is a sick care
model.
Caroline (38:53):
Yeah.
Dr. Naeema (38:54):
and where it removes and deafens women's voices and
it eliminates choice and puts infront of women, you know, to do
lists that have to be checkedoff.
Caroline (39:11):
Hmm.
Dr. Naeema (39:12):
And really treats this, you know, amazing time
this childbearing year into, youknow, some sickness that must be
medicated and managed.
Caroline (39:26):
instead of experienced and
Dr. Naeema (39:29):
Yes.
And so that was my calling.
And I loved the opportunity tohelp other women envision how
that they truly, intuitivelybelieved that they should bring
their children into the world.
Caroline (39:44):
That's so beautiful.
So you're assisting people withtheir birth experience, birth
plan, even before that, bringingthis child to have the best
beginnings of just experiencingthe beauty of the world in
whatever environment that motherchose.
And then you're helping otherwomen with that, your mom to
(40:06):
your children.
And then there was a transitionthat kind of happened as well.
Tell us that.
what then happened to help youhave another chapter.
Dr. Naeema (40:18):
When my oldest was 13, he fell off of a five foot
cinder block wall directly ontohis back on a concrete sidewalk.
And, he paralyzed himself.
and we didn't know at the timethat it was temporary, but it
was, my husband, was working, ona work trip in New York and we
(40:38):
lived in Southern California andI was home with the kids, alone.
And I spent three hours pacingthe emergency room, believing,
that the worst had justhappened.
And through just this amazinggrace, the doctors come out and
they say, there's no internaldamage, there's no broken bones,
(41:03):
there's no internal bleeding.
We don't see any reason why yourson will not make a full
recovery.
And within a few weeks he did,and that was amazing and
incredible.
And several months later, hestarts developing migraine
headaches that we don'tassociate with the fall, because
why would we?
It's been months.
(41:23):
He's a 13-year-old boy.
He does crazy things.
And when we relocated to Georgiafrom Southern California, it has
started with these migraines.
They were headaches and thenthey turned to migraines and we
went the route, the typicalroute like, you know, trying to
really isolate and determinelike, what is this and, and to
(41:45):
get it properly diagnosed and wejust never were able to.
And it was just months and Iwatched this very, you know,
vibrant, extroverted, reallygregarious, child of mine really
start to become withdrawn.
And I spent a lot of timepraying over him and just asking
and pleading and finally, achiropractor introduced herself
(42:10):
to me and through this wonderfulexperience, at this new school
that I did not like.
And I didn't want to want mykids to be there.
And I was disillusioned about mydesire for us to move here to
Georgia.
And I felt like I had made agrave mistake.
(42:33):
Life happens for you.
And through these events thathappen very quickly, um, were
introduced, my husband and Iwere introduced into the world
of chiropractic.
And what does it mean to healfrom the inside out?
And what does it mean to restorethe brain body, connection and
(42:55):
the communication when somethingis off and your body is
demonstrating some sort ofdis-ease?
And we already knew that.
We lived very holistically.
We vegetarian, we were veganthan vegetarian.
We lived very holistically.
My kids were born at home withthe midwife.
We had an herbalist.
They didn't have a traditionalpediatrician, right?
(43:16):
Like we took herbs andsupplements and, you know, talk
to energy healers andnaturopaths, but none of that
was helping migraines until wediscovered chiropractic and
watched through, you know, aseries of visits that not only
(43:36):
did my son completely recover,the migraines disappeared.
But like he just began thrivingagain.
And all I thought in thismoment, having been, you know, a
mother for 13 years and hadthese three kids, that if
somebody like that could give usback health, restore, remove the
(44:01):
interference that helped andallowed his body to restore his
health because our healing justphysically and physiologically
is also the same that we allknow to be true about
emotionally and spiritually
Caroline (44:14):
Okay.
Yes.
Dr. Naeema (44:15):
like our answers are within, we live in a world from
that sort of thrives on thisoutside in approach, but truly
everything comes from within.
And after watching what I feltwas a miraculous healing, I was
like sign me up.
(44:35):
I wanna do that.
I wanna sit kneecap to kneecapwith families and tell them I
know that you have been giventhis diagnosis.
I know that you know anotherprovider has taken away your
help, your hope.
I know that you have stoppedtrusting in your body.
I know that your fears and whatkeeps you up at night.
(44:57):
And I am here to tell you thatif we remove the interference,
your body will do what it isnaturally designed to do, which
is to heal.
And so I went on to become achiropractor and helped
thousands of people over mydecade of practice watching them
(45:19):
regain and restore their ownhealth.
Caroline (45:23):
Oh, that is so beautiful.
Thank you.
So you become Dr.
Naeema, you have a verysuccessful practice and you're
helping countless lives and thenwhat?
Because there's still a gapbetween then and now.
So then what happened to kind ofcouple events kind of happened
(45:44):
to kind of, you know, make a newchapter or couple chapters.
Reinvention
Dr. Naeema (45:48):
is calling again.
by this point, sadly, andunfortunately after 22 years, my
marriage does end.
And I am out in the world asthis, you know, successful
doctor, you know, practiceowner.
I've got a team that I love andtreasure.
I've got amazing patients.
I have a good life.
(46:09):
My kids are, you know, two arealready out of the house.
The last one, you know, isfinishing high school his senior
year, and I get my heart broken.
I fall in desperate love withsomebody who was only ever
designed to break my heart openso that I would step into the
(46:32):
thing that I had been runningfrom my entire adult life.
And that was shoving all of theshame that I felt and carried of
my childhood under as many rugsas possible until that rug just
decided it was no longer willingto do my bidding.
And I began the year longjourney of healing and going to
(46:57):
therapy and really lookingwithin and doing that work and
that true capital W, inner workmeant that I was not the same
woman that I was when I beganthat journey.
And so what came from that yearlong journey was this amazing
(47:20):
memoir, that I was able to poureverything into.
And so here's this beautifulbook that I now have and I can
hold, and it's this baby that Ihave birthed.
It's really like my fifth baby,right?
Like I have three children.
I birthed this practice that Ilove, and now I have this, this
(47:44):
book of this story that is now arepresentative, a symbol that's
representing all of my healingand I feel incredible and
amazing.
And I then try to stuff myselfback into the version of me
before I wrote the book, beforeI went on the healing journey,
(48:05):
and I no longer want the samethings only, I don't wanna admit
that out loud.
Because chiropractic school washard.
We relocated to Georgia, whichwas impossible.
Both of my parents die suddenlyhalfway through, through the
practice.
I have this divorce that I'vesurvived.
Like the last thing I want isanother fucking reinvention.
Caroline (48:26):
Yes.
Dr. Naeema (48:26):
I just want continue to go back into my life.
Only that's not gonna work.
And God knows that's not gonnawork.
And I try really hard and Godsends me little messages and he
Caroline (48:38):
yes,
Dr. Naeema (48:39):
whispers.
And then the taping gets alittle bit harder and a little
bit harder.
All these things are happeningand I just keep ignoring it.
And then I crashed my bike.
I Where were you riding?
Yeah.
Where?
I was riding on the Silver CometTrail here in Atlanta, and I'm
just moseying along and I'mthinking all is well and it's
(49:03):
not.
'cause while I love cycling andI love being outdoors, and it
was beautiful and it waswonderful and all of the things,
God was like, you ain'tlistening.
Caroline (49:12):
So gonna sit you down.
Dr. Naeema (49:14):
Yeah.
And I tore all the hamstringsoff of the bone that you sit on
and I can no longer practicebecause guess what?
Chiropractic is a physical job.
Caroline (49:24):
Yeah.
Dr. Naeema (49:25):
During those very long, horrible, emotionally gut
wrenching nights, laying in mybed after that surgery.
And feeling vulnerable in a waythat I never had.
I'd gone on this year of healingjourney like I'm arrived, I'm
(49:46):
good now.
What I had forgotten is thateverything that I could do, I'm
a doer and I become this doer.
And I had done all of thesethings except that God and I had
co-created this vision that Ihad saw when I was four years
old.
That I would be standing onstages and I would be speaking
(50:09):
into and over women who wereneeding to bridge the chasm that
was between what their visionwas, but where they were
currently, and how do theybridge that?
And I can't do that from withinmy chiropractic practice.
And so God said, you no longerare going to have this option.
(50:31):
And I was bitter and resentfuland I was like, you could have
sent me a text message'causethis is some bullshit.
And I finally just released, Ifinally let go and did the thing
that I do not love, which is tosurrender.
And when I surrender, sold thepractice in nearly everything I
(50:54):
owned.
And I picked up an emptypassport and went on a travel
journey to figure out who isNaeema without the titles,
without the labels, because mykids are now out of the house.
Like, who are you when you arenot identified with all the
things that you have picked upalong the way?
(51:17):
Who are you in countries you'venever been in, in languages you
do not speak.
Who are you?
And most importantly, thequestion I began to ask myself
is, what's possible now?
Caroline (51:33):
Yes.
Oh, this is so just expansiveand glorious.
And we talked a week or so ago,and we could tell in our initial
conversation, we could tell eachof us has done a little bit of
work to get to the version thatwe are now and now seeing how
(51:53):
life was happening for us.
Even if in the moment, it sureas heck didn't feel like that.
And I used to be like, come on,God.
Like seriously, I need anothercharacter building thing?
Like are you kidding me?
Are you kidding me?
Why this?
All right, I guess I'm gonna dothis now.
Oh wow.
Okay.
This is glorious.
Okay, so now we go from you arejust becoming and blossoming
(52:13):
each challenge, eachopportunity, each everything
just keeps growing youramazingness and also uncovering
who you were made to be andthose things that you saw.
And so now, how do you helppeople?
Now let's help.
Dr. Naeema (52:32):
So I have reinvented one more time, and I am now
fully embraced in being areinvention coach.
Like I help other women who wereor are where I was
Caroline (52:53):
Yes.
Dr. Naeema (52:53):
have this dream and or this idea, or maybe just a
little tickle.
There's just a little tingle.
There's a little something thatthey know that is inside that is
beckoning them forward, and Ihelp you bridge the gap.
I help bring those two piecestogether.
(53:14):
I help in a way that ismeaningful and not surface.
And I get blessed by theopportunity to stand in the gap
with you.
Because I think this is thething we have all become
enamored with.
And it is simply this.
(53:36):
I wanna get over, I wanna getto, I want to be on the other
side of this, but what none ofus are pursuing and all of us
desperately need is how do weget through, how do you get
through the that just landed onyour doorstep or what you
(54:00):
created or how life is happeningfor you?
And you know that.
And still it isn't easy.
You're struggling.
You might be cussing like I was.
You might feel some resentmentor for some bitterness or
fatigue and this level ofexhaustion that all you could
(54:26):
hope for is somebody just topartner with you, somebody to
help lift some of the burdenwith you.
Because while nobody can carrysomething for you, they can link
arms with you.
And they can see what you havecreated veils and you no longer
(54:48):
can see.
Because what I believe our jobsare from one human to another is
to continuously reveal andreflect the divinity that is in
all of us.
And if I can re remind you ofwho it is that you are, to me
(55:09):
that's priceless.
That's invaluable because forthe women and men, because God
love my therapist, Earnest,shout out to Earnest,'cause that
man got me through an entireyear and Raised as a Lie exists
because he stood in the gap forme, I think the greatest
(55:30):
blessing that we can give eachother is to highlight and re
remind us of our brilliance.
And now that's the thing that Iget to do on small stages, in
one-on-one, on small groupsessions and on large stages
where I get to speak tothousands of people at a time.
And that's so freaking dope.
Caroline (55:54):
I love it and it's fun how God in my path and in yours
too kind of puts people andyou're like, here you go.
And I was like, you popped up inmy inbox.
I'm like, absolutely.
I'd love to have you again as aguest.
This sounds great.
And we saw it a little bit lastweek and I'm seeing it so much
even more now that the missionthat we are on is parallel
(56:17):
journeys, similar focus,definitely similar words and
intentions that we have inhelping people become and
remember, and also bridge thatgap and have a massive action
plan to get there.
And what do they want for theirlife?
How can the career fuel it.
I love it.
I love it.
I love it.
Now, are you writing anotherbook or is that one already
done?
Dr. Naeema (56:37):
I am in the process.
You know when you imagine likegetting back into this thing,
right?
Like writing that first book wasarduous and I'm like, I was not
a writer.
I was about to claim somethingthat is not true.
I was not a writer.
I am now.
And it was tough.
(57:00):
It was really tough.
And there were moments where Iwas like, I'm just kidding.
I'm closing the laptop.
I was just kidding.
I don't wanna, I don't want it.
And there were times that Iwould come into my therapist's
office and I was like, I'm notgoing to, I'm not doing it.
And he was like, first of all,who are you yelling at?
Caroline (57:18):
Yeah.
Dr. Naeema (57:18):
of all.
So don't do it.
But I wanna do it right?
Like the moment somebody likewhat, what story are you telling
yourself, right?
Like,
Caroline (57:28):
Yeah.
Dr. Naeema (57:28):
story are you telling yourself?
And so that's always theblessing and the beauty of, you
know, somebody who can stand onthe other side of whatever,
meaning that you are giving yourstory, and call that out for
you.
I think accountability is abeautiful thing.
And it comes in all forms.
And so when I raised my handagain to say, yes, I want to, I
(57:51):
wanna write another book, and Iwant this to come from the
perspective of not a memoir, butto use storytelling.
To use these stories because Ibelieve that that's where we are
all connected.
We connected our stories, weconnected the broken parts, we
connected the imperfections, weconnected the things that we're
(58:12):
like, oh shit, what did I do?
But then that's the beauty,because we see each other there.
So to use the stories in a waythat is empowering, not just to
tell my story because that'swhat the memoir was to tell my
story, but this book, thisopportunity is for me to connect
not only my stories, but to tellthe stories of other women that
(58:35):
I have had the blessing to comeinto contact with.
So that more women and men,right, conceive themselves in
this variety of stories, right?
And really truly understand thatyou can connect the dots and
that you can create a place.
(58:55):
So there's two books.
One of it is called YourPossibility Era, and the other
one is Every Damn Thing,
Caroline (59:05):
Yeah.
I love it.
Dr. Naeema (59:07):
your Disruption Manual.
Like why would we want anythingless than every damn thing?
so I love this idea.
And they're both competing withlike, which one is going to come
first?
I'm not sure.
Right.
We'll see.
But I love the idea that bothexist.
it's an and also not an eitheror.
(59:30):
And I love that.
I love that we get to decide,right?
Like, you wanna write multiplebooks at a time, go for it.
You wanna multiple career
Caroline (59:37):
Uh,
Dr. Naeema (59:38):
Go for it.
You wanna like leap out of aplane, which I just did a few
months ago.
Caroline (59:44):
Ooh.
Dr. Naeema (59:45):
I go for it.
Like, do it
Caroline (59:47):
That's on my list.
Dr. Naeema (59:48):
54 and do it.
Like, why not?
Right?
Like, so I truly believe thatthis season in, for me and maybe
other women come to it earlier,but this season for me, it
really is what's possible now.
Caroline (01:00:05):
I love it.
A couple questions.
How do people find you?
How do they work with you andthen I'll have one more.
Dr. Naeema (01:00:10):
Absolutely.
So you can always, find me onthese internet streets, at,
let's see, Instagram, LinkedIn,and Facebook.
I am Dr.
Naeema is the Handle, and alsomy website, DrNaeema.com.
So it's D-R-N-A-E-E-M-A.com
Caroline (01:00:32):
Awesome, and I will have those linked in the show
notes.
I'm big on authentic success,and to me authentic success is
however you define it.
So how do you define authenticsuccess for you in this moment?
Dr. Naeema (01:00:48):
So when I asked the question, who are you without
the labels and the titles, whoare you in places that you have
not already mastered?
I believe it is releasing thethings and the stories you have
told about yourself and yoursuccesses and or your quote
(01:01:12):
unquote failures and reallygetting to who is the essence of
you and how are you choosing towalk in the world?
Because we have all lied toourselves and to others at one
point in our lives, I believethat to the degree that we are
(01:01:33):
willing to be vulnerable enoughto break us down to just our
essence and then tell people whoyou are from that perspective.
I think that that success allday long, because that's where
we truly see each other.
(01:01:54):
That's where I see you and yousee me.
Why wouldn't we wanna dance onthat level?
Caroline (01:02:02):
Absolutely.
Absolutely.
Well, Dr.
Naeema, thank you so much forsharing more of your story and
the beauty, and I highlyencourage people to go check out
the books Raised as a Lie andthe ones that are coming, we
will have links in the shownotes and we'll update those as
those books come out.
But thank you so much forsharing your story and the time
(01:02:26):
with you this morning.
Dr. Naeema (01:02:27):
Such an honor to be here.
Thank you.
Caroline (01:02:30):
Thank you.
Start your own reinvention withDr.
Naeema's free Before the RISEmini journal.
In just five reflective prompts,you'll gain clarity, release
what no longer serves you, andreconnect with your deepest
desires.
You can download it.
From the link in the show notes,you can also connect with her at
(01:02:53):
EveryDamnThing.org and followher on Instagram, LinkedIn, and
Facebook.
Remember, links are in the shownotes.
when you refuse to succumb toyour circumstances and choose to
reinvent and rise in glory, youunlock the kind of success that
is true, powerful, and yoursalone.
(01:03:15):
Dr.
Naeema thank you for sharingyour courage, your story, and
your joy with us today.
And to our listeners, beinspired and take action.
Download her journal, connectwith her work, and step into
your own possibility era.
Here's to your next success.
Thanks for listening to Your Next Success with Dr.
(01:03:38):
Caroline Sangal.
Remember, authentic success isyours to define and includes
aligning your career to supportthe life you want.
What happens when you refuse tosuccumb to your circumstances
and instead choose to reinventand rise in glory?
That is the story of Dr.
Naeema Olatunji from a secretimposed on her in childhood to
seasons of healing, fromheartbreak to a disruption that
unlocked new possibility, herjourney is a living example of
(00:28):
resilience, courage, andexpansion.
This episode is for anyone who'sever felt stuck in the roles or
stories handed to them yet cansense the possibility of
something greater.
Caroline (00:44):
This is the Your Next Success podcast, and I'm your
host, Dr.
Caroline Sangal.
I'm a life first career coachand strategist on a mission to
normalize questioning yourcareer because I believe each of
us is made on purpose for apurpose only we can fulfill.
The longer we live out ofalignment with who we are, what
(01:06):
we do best, and why we're here,the more we miss out.
And the more the world missesout on what only we can give.
The Your Next Success Podcast iswhere we explore how to build a
career that truly fuels yourlife.
We talk about self-discovery,smart job, search strategies,
(01:26):
professional growth, and you'llhear stories from people who've
navigated big career transitionsthemselves so you can see what
it's really like to make boldchanges and feel inspired to
create your own version ofauthentic success, one that is
aligned, meaningful, and trulyyours.
(01:50):
Dr.
Naeema Olatunji is a reinventioncoach, speaker, and an author of
Raised as a Lie.
Her story begins with achildhood wrapped in secrets.
Truths, unspoken yet felt inevery room.
Even then, she carried visionsof a bigger life.
Over the years, she created newpaths, built a thriving healing
(02:14):
practice, and raised her familywith intention, then came
heartbreak and a cyclingaccident that changed everything
instead of shrinking.
Dr.
Naeema embraced the disruption,sold nearly everything, and
traveled through 13 countriesdiscovering new layers of who
(02:34):
she is and the life she wasmeant to live.
Today she radiates joy,possibility, and expansion.
She coaches women over 40 toreclaim their power, rewrite
their stories, and rise intobold lives of purpose and
freedom.
Alongside her memoir, she iswriting two new books, Your
(02:58):
Possibility Era, and Every DamnThing, Your Disruption Manual.
In this episode you'll find thehidden truth that reshaped
Naeema's identity and future,the turning points that open her
path to healing and reinvention,how she embodies joy,
possibility, and expansionthrough disruption.
(03:21):
Her vision of authentic successand a glimpse into her upcoming
books.
Welcome Dr.
Naeema to Your Next Success.
I am thrilled to be having thisconversation with you this
morning and I know it's gonna besuch a delight and our listeners
are going to love it and lovethe beautiful person that you
(03:41):
are.
Dr. Naeema (03:42):
Thank you.
It is such an honor to be here.
I'm excited about what is goingto come of this conversation.
Caroline (03:49):
Yeah, I'm not exactly sure where we're gonna go, but I
know it's gonna be amazing.
So thank you.
Thank you.
I would love to start I knowthat you're super successful.
And you help people a lotthrough transitions,
particularly women over 40.
So that's where we're gonna getto.
But I'd love to dial it way,way, way back.
(04:14):
Can you share a little bit ofthe beginning parts of your
story, particularly yourchildhood, and in those days,
what did you think you wanted todo, with your life and your
career?
Dr. Naeema (04:31):
You know, it's so interesting that you asked this
because I just had thisconversation with a good friend
not that long ago.
And what we were talking aboutis like some of our earliest
memories and how far back canyou remember, and what was the
feeling tone of those memories?
(04:53):
And for anybody who has not readmy memoir, Raised as a Lie, my
life begins on a farm, in ruralUtah, and I remember being out
in the fields and, you know, outon the land, and there was a lot
of time to just play and explorejust really safe.
(05:16):
And I grew to just love, love,love, love nature.
And I spent a lot of time aloneoutside, alone with farm animals
because we lived on a farm and
Caroline (05:27):
kind of animals?
What, what?
Dr. Naeema (05:29):
Everything.
So it was a traditional farm, sothere were horses, cows,
chickens, geese.
There was, so this is, you know,rural, very white Utah.
And I say that to say that Ithink this is so funny.
One of the games that would beplayed is when it was time for,
(05:56):
like entertainment.
Saturday night, fun, fun, wouldbe chopping the heads off of
chickens and seeing how far theywould run down the road.
Caroline (06:05):
Oh my goodness.
Oh my goodness.
Dr. Naeema (06:07):
Who does
Caroline (06:08):
Well,
Dr. Naeema (06:08):
Farmers are
Caroline (06:09):
farmers do that and if that was your, you know,
environment that you were in themidst of, you probably didn't
even question it.
'Cause that's just whathappened.
yeah.
Dr. Naeema (06:21):
I mean, the chicken's head was gonna have to
come off one way or another.
And it wasn't until, you know,fast forward into relocating and
living in city life that I waslike, wow, that's a different
type of entertainment.
And so the farm was really justthis symbol for me of like how
(06:42):
far out in nature could I go?
Because there was
Caroline (06:44):
Okay.
Dr. Naeema (06:45):
a lot of very tumultuous things that were
happening inside the home, butout in nature, especially with
animals.
My very favorite animal on thefarm was my horse, and his name
was Jughead.
And he was this very, very old,like Palomino that he was super
gentle and he didn't move arounda lot, and my mother could trust
(07:07):
him.
And I started riding when I wastwo.
And
Caroline (07:10):
Oh wow.
My
Dr. Naeema (07:11):
earliest memories are some of the pleasant ones
are me being out in the fieldsand just talking to Jughead and
just walking around.
I had this sense that I couldnot describe, but in talking to
my friend earlier last week, itwas really this sense that my
(07:35):
life was going to be so big andI was going to have such an
expansive reach.
And I saw these images of myselfstanding on stages and speaking
to tens of thousands of women.
And I was like, and you know,when you're four.
Caroline (07:58):
Yeah.
Dr. Naeema (07:59):
have a place for this.
And so I remember like thesevisions and this feeling tone of
just really feeling joyful.
and then, you know, you spend alot of your years growing up
forgetting those memories.
And what I am a true believerin, is that we once upon a time
(08:19):
before we ever took our firstbreath, as we sat with God and
co-created the life that we weregoing to live and the lessons
that we were gonna come upagainst and how we were gonna
grow and expand, and to thedegree that I think that life
life's, we can easily forgetthose visions.
(08:41):
And so it's nice to revisit themand re-remember and then sort of
connect the dots, like wherethose moments have really come
to fruition.
Caroline (08:54):
Absolutely, because I think we go through a period of
learning and experiencing andthen unlearning and re sorting
and reshifting.
Okay.
So sounds like some of yourearliest memories were within
this beauty of nature and thefarm and connecting with such a
beautiful creature on a soullevel, even though you couldn't
(09:15):
communicate outwardly thatpeople would see and expect.
And then what happened?
Because I know a bit of yourstory has a whole big deep ball
of fun now.
Dr. Naeema (09:28):
that.
I like
Caroline (09:29):
Yeah, yeah.
So you're on this farm, you'rehaving these experiences that
are in many, many waysbeautiful.
And this escape out to natureand to the beauty outside the
home is giving you just a pieceand visions of a grand future.
And then what happened when youwent to school?
(09:51):
Were there certain subjects thatyou particularly were drawn to
or tell us a little bit aboutthat.
Dr. Naeema (09:58):
That's interesting.
So I'm the little brown girl whowas raised in an all white
family and went to all whiteschools.
And when we moved away from therural farm in Utah, lived in
California and we lived in allwhite communities and my family
was perpetuating a lie that mymother had started and that was
(10:22):
that I too was white.
And for anybody who was watchingthis video, never one day, never
1, 1, 1 day were these curlsever blonde, straight, and never
were my eyes blue-eyed.
And that's what my family lookedlike, right?
My siblings were blonde hair,blue eyed, and the man who was
on my birth certificate alsoblonde hair, blue eyed.
(10:43):
And so I grew up always knowing,you know, I had this
conversation actually yesterdaywith somebody who read my book
and yesterday was the very firsttime we actually met in person.
We share a friend in common.
And so she said, I just didn'tunderstand how could you not
(11:05):
have known?
And the thing is, is that Ididn't not know that I didn't
look like anybody, and I speak alot about that in the beginning
of the book.
I was always aware, and I had anolder sister who was going
through her own trauma andturmoil, who was laser focused
(11:25):
at reminding me at everyopportunity that I not only did
not look like anybody, but Ididn't fit in and I was not
wanted.
And so there was this vastdifference of my experience of
being out in nature and it beinga place of peace and
connectivity and being insidethe home where there was a lot
(11:48):
of turmoil.
And unfortunately, my mother wasmarried to a very violent,
alcoholic.
And so those two realities werevastly contrasted in how they
showed up.
And when she finally had thecourage to leave and we
relocated and came to SouthernCalifornia.
The perpetuation of me beingothered and on the outside
(12:12):
always existed.
My family loved me dearly.
And they were a typical Italianfamily that was extremely
racist.
And so there was this bigelephant that sat in the middle
of the room and that was me.
But nobody ever talked about it.
(12:33):
Nobody ever spoke.
Never one word about this veryobvious elephant that everybody
had to move around and becareful not to, you know,
interact and engage and reallyhave this deep conversation that
was right there present.
And it wasn't until I was 18,and so I say that I found out
(12:57):
the truth.
And so I say all that to saythat my growing up, my
adolescence, my experience, evenin the classrooms and all the
many schools, because we movedaround quite a bit, It weren't
centered around me falling inlove with learning because I
didn't and I wasn't.
I always felt on the outside andI had a lot of angst about being
(13:25):
in close proximity to otherkids.
They weren't nice and theyweren't kind.
And I didn't make, you know,friends.
And it wasn't until I was inhigh school where I had actually
developed some friends and westayed stationary for a little
while, but it was always.
I was the little chocolate dropin the middle of a sea that
(13:48):
folks that didn't look like me.
And so I say that to say that,you know, I didn't gain a love
for knowledge and reallydeveloping our intellect until
college, until I really sort ofdove into the things that I
wanted to study.
(14:09):
And I enjoyed it later on.
But in the beginning, not toomuch.
Caroline (14:15):
So around the time when you were 18, you finally
got a bit of confirmation ofwhat your inner knowing was
trying to tell you and your momadmits to you.
Well, actually, this is such animportant part of your story
though, and it's terrifying andbeautiful what came afterward.
(14:38):
But would you mind sharing whatprompted this revelation from
your mother?
Yeah,
Dr. Naeema (14:49):
yeah,
Caroline (14:49):
yeah.
Dr. Naeema (14:50):
So he had moved to a really small town in Arizona.
The town boasted of its onestoplight.
And
Caroline (14:58):
Hmm.
While
Dr. Naeema (14:59):
we had lived in other places that were rural, it
was, we lived on a farm.
And so this was a very differentexperience because it was a
small town, but people lived inpretty close proximity.
There was zero diversity in thislittle tiny town.
And I was a senior in highschool.
We moved right before a coupleweeks before school started my
(15:20):
senior year.
Caroline (15:21):
Oh wow.
Dr. Naeema (15:21):
And I was expecting the same as always.
By that point, I think I hadmaybe, I think there was like
maybe four or five elementaryschools, one middle school and
three high schools.
Right?
So I had been very familiarizedwith being the new kid and
(15:45):
always being on the outside.
And that was not new to me and Iwas not expecting anything other
than being the new kid and beingsort of shunned or on the
outside or having all thoseawkward or, you know, moments
of,
Caroline (15:59):
Yeah.
can
Dr. Naeema (15:59):
I sit here and, and really just not being accepted.
But this high school was verydifferent and I not only felt
othered and not really desiredto be included, but there was an
animosity that I couldn't put myfinger on because I really
(16:20):
hadn't experienced that before.
There was sort of anindifference or maybe like, who
are you?
And sort of, you know,
Caroline (16:28):
Hmm.
Dr. Naeema (16:28):
turning away from me, but not this level of
aggressive intolerance and I gotcornered one day.
This was a highly second monthinto school, and a couple of the
senior boys had cornered me inthe cafeteria because I used to
(16:50):
try to get there.
I used to try to make an excuseto get outta class so I could
get into the cafeteria, get thefood, and find a table so there
wouldn't be then like, Hmm, canI sit at your table?
Sort of moment.
I tried to avoid that to juststay by myself and these boys
cornered me and they were veryaggressive football, you know,
big corn fed looking dudes, andthey threatened to take me out.
(17:13):
We lived in the desert and sothe kids, the high school kids
would go really far out into thedesert and they would build
these bonfires and drink and dowhatever.
Stupid things that highschoolers do, and they
threatened to take me out thereand lynch me.
And I didn't know what lynchingmeant.
I had had a very whitewashededucation and I didn't know what
(17:37):
lynching meant.
I knew it wasn't good, and Iknew enough to be afraid.
And I left and I went home and Icalled my older sister who
didn't live with us anymore, andwe were not close, but I did not
know who else to ask.
And I called her and I said, Imade her promise, Don't tell
(17:58):
mom.
I really had been aself-appointed protector of my
mother since the violent years,and she never asked me to, but I
did a very good job of trying tobuffer her from anything.
Caroline (18:11):
Hmm.
Dr. Naeema (18:11):
And I didn't want her to be burdened with my
turmoil.
And my sister did exactly whatany loving person would do for
another.
She did tell my mom, and my momwas afraid for my safety.
And in that moment she had
Caroline (18:29):
Hmm.
Dr. Naeema (18:30):
to reveal that the man on my birth certificate,
this nice blonde-haired,blue-eyed man that when he
drank, became an awful humanbeing, was not my biological
father.
And when she revealed that mybiological father was black and
I knew that my family, have beenracist for all of this time.
(18:54):
There was a sense of ah, like ofcourse, right?
But also there was this internalconflict of what does that mean?
If my family doesn't love blackpeople, can they still love me?
And that sort of sent me down abig spiral.
But also, in time, it encouragedand inspired me to really dig
(19:21):
in.
And when I figured out here Iam, I'm 19 at this point, then I
fully embrace this.
And I was like, the worlddoesn't see me as this white
woman.
They just don't.
And so what would it be if Ijust fully embraced who I am and
how the world sees me?
(19:43):
And I decided when I went tocollege, to the University of
Southern California that I wasgoing to make up for lost time
as I thought, and
Caroline (19:51):
Oh.
I
Dr. Naeema (19:52):
became blackety black.
So I turned this very sort oflike heavy, what felt
burdensome, revelation into howcan it empower me?
And it was freeing andliberating in a way that I just
(20:12):
hadn't imagined and it was abeautiful experience, a bit
tumultuous at times as well.
Caroline (20:22):
Okay.
There's so much that could, thatcould be said.
Firstly, thank you for sharingthat part of your story.
That had to be absolutely, Therejust are no words.
Terrifying is not a good, youknow, disappointing,
heartbreaking.
I don't think there's a wordthat exists to capture the
(20:44):
experience that you went throughand I'm so, so sorry that those
children didn't see the amazing,beautiful, but it wasn't for
them, right?
Like rejection is God'sprotection.
Jamie Kern Lima, who says that.
So you have this freeingexperience around 18.
See, I study career careers andcareer transitions.
(21:05):
And there are many timesthroughout somebody's lives that
we go through this questioningof, is this really what I wanna
do?
You know, who am I?
What do I wanna become?
And around 18 is one of thefirst ones.
So you have this now lookingback, a bit liberating moment of
there is more to you.
(21:25):
You are so beautiful while alsothen getting to leave and become
in college.
And so when you were going toget to the University of
Southern California, what didyou choose to study?
Now that you got to make allyour own choices and you're
realizing even more the beautyof who you are.
Dr. Naeema (21:48):
I originally went as a poli sci major because I was
going to be an attorney and Iloved the idea, I was gonna
finish at USC go to NYU, I wasgonna study law and I was gonna
join one of the corporate globalpractices and really just
(22:08):
embrace this idealized life ofan attorney.
And then I attended
Caroline (22:19):
Yeah.
Dr. Naeema (22:20):
course called The Awake Lecture Series and it blew
my mind.
And it was an awakening ofconsciousness for black people
to realize that we did not comefrom enslaved humans.
(22:41):
We were not the regrettablehumans that lived in this
country, but that we hailed fromthe original people, and I was
floored.
There was this expansion that Inever imagined was even
(23:03):
possible.
And so when that revelationhappened, and the only reason it
could have happened is becauseof that terrible thing that
happens in high school.
And so these realizations thatas life is unfolding, it is
happening for you.
And so seeing is this unfoldmentof life happening for me, and
(23:30):
what I did was turned everythingupside down.
And I went to the board,essentially it was through a lot
of meetings, college advisor,and I just had to keep, you
know, escalating my requestsbecause there was no division of
USC that had any level of ethnicstudies on any level, save the
(23:55):
Holocaust classes that theyoffered, the Jewish Holocaust
classes that they offered inliterature outside of that it
didn't exist.
And this was in 1992.
So you have to remember, this isalso on the heels of the
uprising after the Rodney King
Caroline (24:13):
Yeah.
Dr. Naeema (24:14):
verdict for the police officers who were
acquitted.
And so there's this uprising inLA.
The city is on fire and there isthis beckoning that we cannot
return once we came with this unacknowledgement, I think I just
made up that word.
(24:34):
and just disregard of, you know,what was the contribution of
Africans in this world and, andhow are we showing up in this
particular country?
And so all of this awakening ishappening at this time.
And I am feeling called to makea difference and wanting to
(24:58):
desperately be a beneficialpresence on the planet.
And I could not see in the legalsystem that would acquit these
men who clearly committed thisheinous crime that I could
participate in it.
I never, for once consideredcivil rights, being a civil
rights attorney and had I, Iwould've made a different
(25:19):
choice, but I turned it allupside down, escalated as far as
I could up to the board of USCand demanded that I be able to
study what I wanted to studywhich was African American
history.
They granted me the opportunityto make my major called Ethnic
(25:40):
Studies.
And so, because they had nocurriculum in place, no
structure, there was no strategyaround it.
I just essentially went aroundto the university, found all the
black professors, and I waslike, I wanna take your class.
Now there weren't that many andthere was only 3 percent of
black students on campus, but I
Caroline (25:59):
Yeah.
I looked it up yesterday.
I was like, yeah, I'm thinking,how did this work out?
Because I don't know that thatwas a very diverse campus and
diverse school, but here you aretrying to understand even more
of who you are.
And this was the environmentyou're in.
So now you're gonna bloom whereyou're planted.
That's amazing.
I did not know this part.
(26:20):
I'm seeing themes here though.
Like, so there's one theme ofyou had this desire even to
maybe draw you into thinkingabout law.
There's an underpinning of rightand wrong and justice and
letting the truth prevail.
That's the holistic ideal,right?
And then the reality of, oh,that's not actually what we see.
(26:42):
And then your desire even moreof where did I come from?
What are the beautiful historiesof all those who came before me
and how can I take it and exceland, and move forward?
So you make your own version ofyour major.
You study what comes to you andthen what happened?
Because I'm not clear on gettingto USC, going and finding your
(27:04):
major and then finding yourselfX time from now, marrying
somebody, having multiplechildren.
And then so what happened inbetween there?
What happened in, how did thatall unfold?
Dr. Naeema (27:20):
I actually met my husband, then husband at The
Awake Lecture Series at
Caroline (27:27):
Oh,
Dr. Naeema (27:29):
I just thought we were gonna be friends.
And I had found out actually onour first date that he leaned
over to his best friend when Iwalked in the room and he said,
that's the woman I'm gonnamarry.
And he tells me this on ourfirst date.
And I was like, boy, you
Caroline (27:45):
that's too much.
Dr. Naeema (27:45):
are out of your mind.
Caroline (27:46):
Yeah.
Dr. Naeema (27:47):
I am not getting married.
Caroline (27:49):
Yeah.
Dr. Naeema (27:50):
I mean, I was too busy enjoying myself and my
freedom and you know, being a23-year-old and just fully for
the first time stepping into whoI was
Caroline (28:02):
Yeah.
maybe with that viewpoint backin the day of the marriage that
you saw was scary.
Dr. Naeema (28:11):
Well, not only did I think about like what does it
mean to be in partnership.
My mother, after she divorcedthe man on my birth certificate,
my mother was, I think herpicker got really good.
(28:31):
'cause before it wasn't good.
And she met and married mystepfather, who we all called
dad.
So I was in third grade and hewas probably one of the greatest
human beings I've ever had theblessing to know, to know Art
was to know that you saw God.
(28:54):
He was gentle and kind andcompassionate and generous to a
fault.
He take his shirt off to wrapnicely up his last dollar and
hand it to you and bless you.
And make sure that you werelaughing as you walked along
your merry way.
(29:14):
Just an incredible human being.
And we got blessed to have himin our life until he shuffled
off of the mortal coil rightbefore I turned 40.
And so he had a chance to loveand embrace and be this
incredible grandfather to mythree children and father-in-law
to my husband.
(29:35):
And it was such a blessing.
So I had this experience ofknowing what it was to be such a
great man, but I was 23 and Iwas uninterested in being
married.
And you know, they say when youmeet a man who was very clear
about what it is that hedesires, watch out.
Caroline (29:57):
Yeah.
Dr. Naeema (29:58):
'Cause we were married 6 months later and
experiencing becoming parentsand really just embracing this
African centered lifestyle.
So all three of our childrenwere born at home with a
midwife.
They all bear African names thathave meanings.
(30:18):
We chose the meanings before theactual name, and we did not name
them until observing an Africantradition until they arrive
here.
And we did not reveal the nameuntil seven days after they came
because it's time to meet thislittle spirit and know who they
are and really just get to knowthis being that is coming
(30:43):
through you, but not for you.
Right?
And how
Caroline (30:46):
Absolutely.
Dr. Naeema (30:46):
you know, desire for them to live in the world.
And so we live this verycentered lifestyle.
And so what I think also is athing, to go back to what you
said is what I have been doingmy entire life has been
reinventing.
So it is no strange, you know,coincidence, if you will.
That I am a reinvention coachnow, you know?
(31:06):
because I think that that's thething, that you really observe
that something you said earlierthat the thing that I became
really good at is blooming whereI was planted.
But more than that, I think thatmy stepfather that we call dad
really taught and instilled inme, is you don't only bloom
(31:27):
because how you bloom isevidenced in the people that you
are closest to.
Like, how do you bless otherpeople that you don't only look
for self gratification, but themeaning and the purpose in your
life really is demonstrated inhow you serve.
And that really has been also areal central theme for me.
(31:51):
I mean, I went through myselfish years.
Don't get it twisted.
my
Caroline (31:55):
We, we,
Dr. Naeema (31:57):
that is
Caroline (31:57):
That's a whole nother episode.
(32:40):
I wanna bring it a little bit tothis, the beauty of a name and
seeing the child and whatthey're becoming and choosing
the right name and having thatmeaning.
I was very intentional with mychildren and their names.
My husband is originally fromIndia, and I wanted to have
(33:01):
names that were beautiful andthat my side of the family could
try to pronounce nicely, andthat meant something deep.
And yet also were notcontradictory with my faith and
my traditions because they'redifferent than my husband's
faith and his traditions.
Would you mind sharing, when didyou become this beautiful name
(33:22):
of Naeema?
Dr. Naeema (33:25):
I think that I always knew I was born given my
grandmother's name, my mother'smother, who was just this, she
was a really soul who had areally, really hard life and she
(33:45):
did the best that she could withwhat she was given.
And she was an incredible humanand I was honored that I was
given her name, I was given hername as a second thought.
My mom knew she was having aboy.
Never imagined she was having agirl.
(34:06):
And when I came out as a girl, Ithink that she was very shocked.
And so there was no girl name,and it became the default like.
And while it is honorablebecause she was such a beautiful
human, it never fit, ever.
(34:31):
And I could stare into mygrandmother's blue eyes until
there were no more sunsets andit would never have fit.
It was always the thing that Iwas wearing, but never truly
inhabiting.
And so when my husband and Iwere married, one of the things
(34:52):
that we decided is that we weregoing to give each other our
given chosen name
Caroline (35:01):
Oh, so beautiful.
Dr. Naeema (35:03):
we were going to change our names, and so he gave
me my name.
We were supposed to just dofirst, but I'm an overachiever,
so I gave him his first andmiddle name, and when I heard
the name standing facing him, itwas this revelation and I get
(35:23):
goosebumps to this day, liketelling this story.
I knew that he understood and hesaw me for the very first time I
felt seen.
And so here I am, I'm 24, andfor the very first time in my
life, I know that the energythat is called, right, every
(35:49):
word has energy.
The energy that is evoked everytime my name will be uttered
will be something that I couldtruly embody.
And that was a reflection of whoI am and how I want to show up
and who I aspire to be and towhom I belong.
(36:12):
And so it was this beautifulmoment.
And so he told me the meaningbefore the name.
And it transcends manylanguages, like many words.
But it is kindhearted andcompassionate in Hebrew, it's
the God of all good things.
It's the things that peopleremind you of when you forget
(36:32):
to, you know, when you have atemporary lapse.
It's when you're being human andless spiritual.
and so to be compassionate andkindhearted and a beneficial
presence on the planet to embodythose descriptions and to know
that that's where my heartresides.
(36:53):
And then when he finally said,Naeema.
I had to giggle'cause it's thename of the song that he would
play over and over when I waspregnant.
And we would put, my belly nextto these big giant speakers.
cause it was the early nineties.
Caroline (37:10):
Yeah.
Yeah.
So
Dr. Naeema (37:11):
that, you know, our unborn son could listen to the
beautiful sounds of JohnColtrane.
And he wrote this ballad.
my then husband was a huge fanof jazz and I became to love it
because of him.
And so John Coltrane, this verysoulful jazz musician that was a
(37:33):
horn player far before his time,wrote this ballad to his wife
called Naeema.
And it was such a beautifulmoment.
Caroline (37:44):
Oh, thank you so much for sharing that.
And he saw you, he loved youeven from the first moment of
seeing you if he's, you know,whispering over to his friend
that he's gonna marry you, andof course you weren't quite sure
of that plan yet.
But then you became and had aquite a great brought in three
beautiful children into theworld.
How did that change yourtrajectory from what you thought
(38:08):
you wanted to do?
Work-wise to then becoming awife, becoming a mother.
What did you choose to do inthat?
What did you feel called to doafter having your children?
Dr. Naeema (38:21):
My experience with having my children at home with
the midwife, the very first oneI was like, this is it.
This is what I wanna do.
I want to empower other women tobirth in a way that they choose,
not in the way that, you know, amedical provider chooses, not in
a way that is, orchestrated by abuilding of sick people that are
(38:48):
being treated, in a medicalmodel, which is a sick care
model.
Caroline (38:53):
Yeah.
Dr. Naeema (38:54):
and where it removes and deafens women's voices and
it eliminates choice and puts infront of women, you know, to do
lists that have to be checkedoff.
Caroline (39:11):
Hmm.
Dr. Naeema (39:12):
And really treats this, you know, amazing time
this childbearing year into, youknow, some sickness that must be
medicated and managed.
Caroline (39:26):
instead of experienced and
Dr. Naeema (39:29):
Yes.
And so that was my calling.
And I loved the opportunity tohelp other women envision how
that they truly, intuitivelybelieved that they should bring
their children into the world.
Caroline (39:44):
That's so beautiful.
So you're assisting people withtheir birth experience, birth
plan, even before that, bringingthis child to have the best
beginnings of just experiencingthe beauty of the world in
whatever environment that motherchose.
And then you're helping otherwomen with that, your mom to
(40:06):
your children.
And then there was a transitionthat kind of happened as well.
Tell us that.
what then happened to help youhave another chapter.
Dr. Naeema (40:18):
When my oldest was 13, he fell off of a five foot
cinder block wall directly ontohis back on a concrete sidewalk.
And, he paralyzed himself.
and we didn't know at the timethat it was temporary, but it
was, my husband, was working, ona work trip in New York and we
(40:38):
lived in Southern California andI was home with the kids, alone.
And I spent three hours pacingthe emergency room, believing,
that the worst had justhappened.
And through just this amazinggrace, the doctors come out and
they say, there's no internaldamage, there's no broken bones,
(41:03):
there's no internal bleeding.
We don't see any reason why yourson will not make a full
recovery.
And within a few weeks he did,and that was amazing and
incredible.
And several months later, hestarts developing migraine
headaches that we don'tassociate with the fall, because
why would we?
It's been months.
(41:23):
He's a 13-year-old boy.
He does crazy things.
And when we relocated to Georgiafrom Southern California, it has
started with these migraines.
They were headaches and thenthey turned to migraines and we
went the route, the typicalroute like, you know, trying to
really isolate and determinelike, what is this and, and to
(41:45):
get it properly diagnosed and wejust never were able to.
And it was just months and Iwatched this very, you know,
vibrant, extroverted, reallygregarious, child of mine really
start to become withdrawn.
And I spent a lot of timepraying over him and just asking
and pleading and finally, achiropractor introduced herself
(42:10):
to me and through this wonderfulexperience, at this new school
that I did not like.
And I didn't want to want mykids to be there.
And I was disillusioned about mydesire for us to move here to
Georgia.
And I felt like I had made agrave mistake.
(42:33):
Life happens for you.
And through these events thathappen very quickly, um, were
introduced, my husband and Iwere introduced into the world
of chiropractic.
And what does it mean to healfrom the inside out?
And what does it mean to restorethe brain body, connection and
(42:55):
the communication when somethingis off and your body is
demonstrating some sort ofdis-ease?
And we already knew that.
We lived very holistically.
We vegetarian, we were veganthan vegetarian.
We lived very holistically.
My kids were born at home withthe midwife.
We had an herbalist.
They didn't have a traditionalpediatrician, right?
(43:16):
Like we took herbs andsupplements and, you know, talk
to energy healers andnaturopaths, but none of that
was helping migraines until wediscovered chiropractic and
watched through, you know, aseries of visits that not only
(43:36):
did my son completely recover,the migraines disappeared.
But like he just began thrivingagain.
And all I thought in thismoment, having been, you know, a
mother for 13 years and hadthese three kids, that if
somebody like that could give usback health, restore, remove the
(44:01):
interference that helped andallowed his body to restore his
health because our healing justphysically and physiologically
is also the same that we allknow to be true about
emotionally and spiritually
Caroline (44:14):
Okay.
Yes.
Dr. Naeema (44:15):
like our answers are within, we live in a world from
that sort of thrives on thisoutside in approach, but truly
everything comes from within.
And after watching what I feltwas a miraculous healing, I was
like sign me up.
(44:35):
I wanna do that.
I wanna sit kneecap to kneecapwith families and tell them I
know that you have been giventhis diagnosis.
I know that you know anotherprovider has taken away your
help, your hope.
I know that you have stoppedtrusting in your body.
I know that your fears and whatkeeps you up at night.
(44:57):
And I am here to tell you thatif we remove the interference,
your body will do what it isnaturally designed to do, which
is to heal.
And so I went on to become achiropractor and helped
thousands of people over mydecade of practice watching them
(45:19):
regain and restore their ownhealth.
Caroline (45:23):
Oh, that is so beautiful.
Thank you.
So you become Dr.
Naeema, you have a verysuccessful practice and you're
helping countless lives and thenwhat?
Because there's still a gapbetween then and now.
So then what happened to kind ofcouple events kind of happened
(45:44):
to kind of, you know, make a newchapter or couple chapters.
Reinvention
Dr. Naeema (45:48):
is calling again.
by this point, sadly, andunfortunately after 22 years, my
marriage does end.
And I am out in the world asthis, you know, successful
doctor, you know, practiceowner.
I've got a team that I love andtreasure.
I've got amazing patients.
I have a good life.
(46:09):
My kids are, you know, two arealready out of the house.
The last one, you know, isfinishing high school his senior
year, and I get my heart broken.
I fall in desperate love withsomebody who was only ever
designed to break my heart openso that I would step into the
(46:32):
thing that I had been runningfrom my entire adult life.
And that was shoving all of theshame that I felt and carried of
my childhood under as many rugsas possible until that rug just
decided it was no longer willingto do my bidding.
And I began the year longjourney of healing and going to
(46:57):
therapy and really lookingwithin and doing that work and
that true capital W, inner workmeant that I was not the same
woman that I was when I beganthat journey.
And so what came from that yearlong journey was this amazing
(47:20):
memoir, that I was able to poureverything into.
And so here's this beautifulbook that I now have and I can
hold, and it's this baby that Ihave birthed.
It's really like my fifth baby,right?
Like I have three children.
I birthed this practice that Ilove, and now I have this, this
(47:44):
book of this story that is now arepresentative, a symbol that's
representing all of my healingand I feel incredible and
amazing.
And I then try to stuff myselfback into the version of me
before I wrote the book, beforeI went on the healing journey,
(48:05):
and I no longer want the samethings only, I don't wanna admit
that out loud.
Because chiropractic school washard.
We relocated to Georgia, whichwas impossible.
Both of my parents die suddenlyhalfway through, through the
practice.
I have this divorce that I'vesurvived.
Like the last thing I want isanother fucking reinvention.
Caroline (48:26):
Yes.
Dr. Naeema (48:26):
I just want continue to go back into my life.
Only that's not gonna work.
And God knows that's not gonnawork.
And I try really hard and Godsends me little messages and he
Caroline (48:38):
yes,
Dr. Naeema (48:39):
whispers.
And then the taping gets alittle bit harder and a little
bit harder.
All these things are happeningand I just keep ignoring it.
And then I crashed my bike.
I Where were you riding?
Yeah.
Where?
I was riding on the Silver CometTrail here in Atlanta, and I'm
just moseying along and I'mthinking all is well and it's
(49:03):
not.
'cause while I love cycling andI love being outdoors, and it
was beautiful and it waswonderful and all of the things,
God was like, you ain'tlistening.
Caroline (49:12):
So gonna sit you down.
Dr. Naeema (49:14):
Yeah.
And I tore all the hamstringsoff of the bone that you sit on
and I can no longer practicebecause guess what?
Chiropractic is a physical job.
Caroline (49:24):
Yeah.
Dr. Naeema (49:25):
During those very long, horrible, emotionally gut
wrenching nights, laying in mybed after that surgery.
And feeling vulnerable in a waythat I never had.
I'd gone on this year of healingjourney like I'm arrived, I'm
(49:46):
good now.
What I had forgotten is thateverything that I could do, I'm
a doer and I become this doer.
And I had done all of thesethings except that God and I had
co-created this vision that Ihad saw when I was four years
old.
That I would be standing onstages and I would be speaking
(50:09):
into and over women who wereneeding to bridge the chasm that
was between what their visionwas, but where they were
currently, and how do theybridge that?
And I can't do that from withinmy chiropractic practice.
And so God said, you no longerare going to have this option.
(50:31):
And I was bitter and resentfuland I was like, you could have
sent me a text message'causethis is some bullshit.
And I finally just released, Ifinally let go and did the thing
that I do not love, which is tosurrender.
And when I surrender, sold thepractice in nearly everything I
(50:54):
owned.
And I picked up an emptypassport and went on a travel
journey to figure out who isNaeema without the titles,
without the labels, because mykids are now out of the house.
Like, who are you when you arenot identified with all the
things that you have picked upalong the way?
(51:17):
Who are you in countries you'venever been in, in languages you
do not speak.
Who are you?
And most importantly, thequestion I began to ask myself
is, what's possible now?
Caroline (51:33):
Yes.
Oh, this is so just expansiveand glorious.
And we talked a week or so ago,and we could tell in our initial
conversation, we could tell eachof us has done a little bit of
work to get to the version thatwe are now and now seeing how
(51:53):
life was happening for us.
Even if in the moment, it sureas heck didn't feel like that.
And I used to be like, come on,God.
Like seriously, I need anothercharacter building thing?
Like are you kidding me?
Are you kidding me?
Why this?
All right, I guess I'm gonna dothis now.
Oh wow.
Okay.
This is glorious.
Okay, so now we go from you arejust becoming and blossoming
(52:13):
each challenge, eachopportunity, each everything
just keeps growing youramazingness and also uncovering
who you were made to be andthose things that you saw.
And so now, how do you helppeople?
Now let's help.
Dr. Naeema (52:32):
So I have reinvented one more time, and I am now
fully embraced in being areinvention coach.
Like I help other women who wereor are where I was
Caroline (52:53):
Yes.
Dr. Naeema (52:53):
have this dream and or this idea, or maybe just a
little tickle.
There's just a little tingle.
There's a little something thatthey know that is inside that is
beckoning them forward, and Ihelp you bridge the gap.
I help bring those two piecestogether.
(53:14):
I help in a way that ismeaningful and not surface.
And I get blessed by theopportunity to stand in the gap
with you.
Because I think this is thething we have all become
enamored with.
And it is simply this.
(53:36):
I wanna get over, I wanna getto, I want to be on the other
side of this, but what none ofus are pursuing and all of us
desperately need is how do weget through, how do you get
through the that just landed onyour doorstep or what you
(54:00):
created or how life is happeningfor you?
And you know that.
And still it isn't easy.
You're struggling.
You might be cussing like I was.
You might feel some resentmentor for some bitterness or
fatigue and this level ofexhaustion that all you could
(54:26):
hope for is somebody just topartner with you, somebody to
help lift some of the burdenwith you.
Because while nobody can carrysomething for you, they can link
arms with you.
And they can see what you havecreated veils and you no longer
(54:48):
can see.
Because what I believe our jobsare from one human to another is
to continuously reveal andreflect the divinity that is in
all of us.
And if I can re remind you ofwho it is that you are, to me
(55:09):
that's priceless.
That's invaluable because forthe women and men, because God
love my therapist, Earnest,shout out to Earnest,'cause that
man got me through an entireyear and Raised as a Lie exists
because he stood in the gap forme, I think the greatest
(55:30):
blessing that we can give eachother is to highlight and re
remind us of our brilliance.
And now that's the thing that Iget to do on small stages, in
one-on-one, on small groupsessions and on large stages
where I get to speak tothousands of people at a time.
And that's so freaking dope.
Caroline (55:54):
I love it and it's fun how God in my path and in yours
too kind of puts people andyou're like, here you go.
And I was like, you popped up inmy inbox.
I'm like, absolutely.
I'd love to have you again as aguest.
This sounds great.
And we saw it a little bit lastweek and I'm seeing it so much
even more now that the missionthat we are on is parallel
(56:17):
journeys, similar focus,definitely similar words and
intentions that we have inhelping people become and
remember, and also bridge thatgap and have a massive action
plan to get there.
And what do they want for theirlife?
How can the career fuel it.
I love it.
I love it.
I love it.
Now, are you writing anotherbook or is that one already
done?
Dr. Naeema (56:37):
I am in the process.
You know when you imagine likegetting back into this thing,
right?
Like writing that first book wasarduous and I'm like, I was not
a writer.
I was about to claim somethingthat is not true.
I was not a writer.
I am now.
And it was tough.
(57:00):
It was really tough.
And there were moments where Iwas like, I'm just kidding.
I'm closing the laptop.
I was just kidding.
I don't wanna, I don't want it.
And there were times that Iwould come into my therapist's
office and I was like, I'm notgoing to, I'm not doing it.
And he was like, first of all,who are you yelling at?
Caroline (57:18):
Yeah.
Dr. Naeema (57:18):
of all.
So don't do it.
But I wanna do it right?
Like the moment somebody likewhat, what story are you telling
yourself, right?
Like,
Caroline (57:28):
Yeah.
Dr. Naeema (57:28):
story are you telling yourself?
And so that's always theblessing and the beauty of, you
know, somebody who can stand onthe other side of whatever,
meaning that you are giving yourstory, and call that out for
you.
I think accountability is abeautiful thing.
And it comes in all forms.
And so when I raised my handagain to say, yes, I want to, I
(57:51):
wanna write another book, and Iwant this to come from the
perspective of not a memoir, butto use storytelling.
To use these stories because Ibelieve that that's where we are
all connected.
We connected our stories, weconnected the broken parts, we
connected the imperfections, weconnected the things that we're
(58:12):
like, oh shit, what did I do?
But then that's the beauty,because we see each other there.
So to use the stories in a waythat is empowering, not just to
tell my story because that'swhat the memoir was to tell my
story, but this book, thisopportunity is for me to connect
not only my stories, but to tellthe stories of other women that
(58:35):
I have had the blessing to comeinto contact with.
So that more women and men,right, conceive themselves in
this variety of stories, right?
And really truly understand thatyou can connect the dots and
that you can create a place.
(58:55):
So there's two books.
One of it is called YourPossibility Era, and the other
one is Every Damn Thing,
Caroline (59:05):
Yeah.
I love it.
Dr. Naeema (59:07):
your Disruption Manual.
Like why would we want anythingless than every damn thing?
so I love this idea.
And they're both competing withlike, which one is going to come
first?
I'm not sure.
Right.
We'll see.
But I love the idea that bothexist.
it's an and also not an eitheror.
(59:30):
And I love that.
I love that we get to decide,right?
Like, you wanna write multiplebooks at a time, go for it.
You wanna multiple career
Caroline (59:37):
Uh,
Dr. Naeema (59:38):
Go for it.
You wanna like leap out of aplane, which I just did a few
months ago.
Caroline (59:44):
Ooh.
Dr. Naeema (59:45):
I go for it.
Like, do it
Caroline (59:47):
That's on my list.
Dr. Naeema (59:48):
54 and do it.
Like, why not?
Right?
Like, so I truly believe thatthis season in, for me and maybe
other women come to it earlier,but this season for me, it
really is what's possible now.
Caroline (01:00:05):
I love it.
A couple questions.
How do people find you?
How do they work with you andthen I'll have one more.
Dr. Naeema (01:00:10):
Absolutely.
So you can always, find me onthese internet streets, at,
let's see, Instagram, LinkedIn,and Facebook.
I am Dr.
Naeema is the Handle, and alsomy website, DrNaeema.com.
So it's D-R-N-A-E-E-M-A.com
Caroline (01:00:32):
Awesome, and I will have those linked in the show
notes.
I'm big on authentic success,and to me authentic success is
however you define it.
So how do you define authenticsuccess for you in this moment?
Dr. Naeema (01:00:48):
So when I asked the question, who are you without
the labels and the titles, whoare you in places that you have
not already mastered?
I believe it is releasing thethings and the stories you have
told about yourself and yoursuccesses and or your quote
(01:01:12):
unquote failures and reallygetting to who is the essence of
you and how are you choosing towalk in the world?
Because we have all lied toourselves and to others at one
point in our lives, I believethat to the degree that we are
(01:01:33):
willing to be vulnerable enoughto break us down to just our
essence and then tell people whoyou are from that perspective.
I think that that success allday long, because that's where
we truly see each other.
(01:01:54):
That's where I see you and yousee me.
Why wouldn't we wanna dance onthat level?
Caroline (01:02:02):
Absolutely.
Absolutely.
Well, Dr.
Naeema, thank you so much forsharing more of your story and
the beauty, and I highlyencourage people to go check out
the books Raised as a Lie andthe ones that are coming, we
will have links in the shownotes and we'll update those as
those books come out.
But thank you so much forsharing your story and the time
(01:02:26):
with you this morning.
Dr. Naeema (01:02:27):
Such an honor to be here.
Thank you.
Caroline (01:02:30):
Thank you.
Start your own reinvention withDr.
Naeema's free Before the RISEmini journal.
In just five reflective prompts,you'll gain clarity, release
what no longer serves you, andreconnect with your deepest
desires.
You can download it.
From the link in the show notes,you can also connect with her at
(01:02:53):
EveryDamnThing.org and followher on Instagram, LinkedIn, and
Facebook.
Remember, links are in the shownotes.
when you refuse to succumb toyour circumstances and choose to
reinvent and rise in glory, youunlock the kind of success that
is true, powerful, and yoursalone.
(01:03:15):
Dr.
Naeema thank you for sharingyour courage, your story, and
your joy with us today.
And to our listeners, beinspired and take action.
Download her journal, connectwith her work, and step into
your own possibility era.
Here's to your next success.
Thanks for listening to Your Next Success with Dr.
(01:03:38):
Caroline Sangal.
Remember, authentic success isyours to define and includes
aligning your career to supportthe life you want.
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