June 18, 2025 • 32 mins
What if the real reason you are stuck is not your resume or strategy but your mind?
In this episode of Your Next Success Dr Caroline Sangal shares the breakthrough that reshaped her coaching method forever The story of one brilliant chemist unlocks the hidden force behind self-sabotage and explains why even the most prepared professionals fall apart under pressure.
You will learn how mental fitness changes everything from how you lead to how you interview to how you show up in life You will also meet the ten saboteurs that hijack your clarity drain your energy and keep you stuck
This episode introduces Positive Intelligence also known as PQ and why it is now a core pillar of the Next Success Method
What You Will Learn
- Why high performers still self-sabotage
- The real difference between emotional intelligence and mental fitness
- How to identify and overcome the ten most common saboteurs
- What the Sage brain is and how to access it during pressure moments
- How to retrain your mind to respond instead of react
- Daily practices to build mental strength in just 15 minutes a day
- Why mental fitness became a foundational part of the Next Success Method
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Watch full video episodes on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@NextSuccessMethod/
Learn more about Next Success www.nextsuccesscareers.com
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:02):
What if the thing standingbetween you and your Next
Success isn't about workingharder, but thinking clearer?
What if your ability to staycalm, present, and grounded,
especially when the pressure ishigh?
Is the real secret to unlockingeverything you've been chasing.
(00:25):
Today I am sharing a story thatchanged everything for me.
It revealed a hidden force thatderails even the most brilliant
minds.
And once you recognize it, yourawareness expands and everything
begins to align.
Caroline (00:44):
Have you ever wondered, is this it?
That question is the beginningof Your Next Success.
I am Dr.
Caroline Sangal, and thispodcast is your space to pause,
reflect, and create the careerand life you were made for.
(01:06):
We explore real stories,intentional transitions, and
practical insights to help youstep into alignment, purpose and
peace.
Welcome to your Next Success,the podcast that helps you
question what's next, reconnectwith, who you truly are, and
design the life and career youwere created for.
(01:27):
I'm Dr.
Caroline Sangal, careerstrategist, scientist, and
creator of the Next SuccessMethod.
And this episode is one I'vewanted to share for a long time
because what I learned from oneclient.
changed the way I coach forever.
Let's begin.
In this episode, you'll discoverthe hidden force that holds even
(01:49):
the most capable professionalsback, how it shows up in high
stakes moments, and thebreakthrough framework that can
help you stay grounded andpowerful under pressure.
We'll explore the real storybehind self-sabotage, introduce
the positive intelligence PQmodel, and show you how to build
(02:10):
the mental muscles that turninner chaos into clarity.
When I first developed the NextSuccess Method, I focused on
three transformative insightsthat each of us has natural
abilities, hardwired ways thatour brains problem solve,
communicate, and contribute.
That our communication behaviorstyle shapes how we build
(02:33):
relationships and navigatechallenges, and that we need an
integrated vision for life.
One that prioritizes alignmentbetween who we are and the work
we choose to do.
This approach was based on aholistic view that people are so
much more than their job title,salary, or location.
(02:58):
To truly make aligned decisionsabout their future, they needed
to expand the lens beyond theresume and consider the whole
person what gave them energy,what drained them, what mattered
most when they had clarity aboutwho they were at their core,
(03:19):
they could begin to build avision for their life first, and
then align their career tosupport it.
And the results were powerful.
Some clients launched newbusinesses, others pivoted into
work they loved, and somefinally understood why certain
roles felt heavy.
Even if they looked successfulon paper, they began making
(03:44):
intentional decisions about thework they wanted to do and the
life they wanted to live.
Some even rediscovered hobbiesthat they had long left behind
and began feeling likethemselves again.
But something kept surfacing, arecurring pattern.
I would witness incredibletransformation followed by
(04:06):
unexpected stalls.
Clients would gain momentum,then hesitate, delay their next
step, or sabotage their ownprogress just as things were
coming together and it made mepause.
What was happening beneath thesurface?
(04:26):
Here's what I came tounderstand.
Mental clarity createsdirection.
Mental fitness makes itsustainable.
You can know who you are andwhat you want.
You can craft the perfectstrategy.
You can even practice yourmessage a hundred times.
But when the pressure hits, whenthe lights go on, and the stakes
(04:49):
are high, what matters most isyour ability to stay clear and
calm in the moment.
That's the difference betweenknowing and embodying, and that
difference came into full viewwhile working with a client.
I'll never forget, he was asynthetic chemist, PhD,
(05:10):
brilliant, soft spoken, deeplythoughtful, his resume sparkled,
but his story went far beyondbullet points.
He grew up in a remote village,in a developing country, was
raised by a single mother whoworked tirelessly to provide for
him.
They didn't have much, but hehad an insatiable hunger to
(05:31):
learn.
He would pull newspapers fromthe trash bins just to read
anything he could get his handson, he devoured, and that's how
he learned about the world,through fragments of ink stained
pages.
He earned his education againstall odds.
He received scholarships and wasinvited to study
(05:52):
internationally.
His life was a mosaic of grit,brilliance and perseverance.
When he came to me, I wouldn'tsay that he was struggling, he
was excelling, but somethinginside of him knew there was
more.
He had been working at acontract manufacturing company,
was creating chemical compoundsfor larger pharmaceutical
(06:14):
companies, but the work thatonce had been exciting, had
become monotonous.
He wanted more meaning,challenge and growth.
He came to me asking me to helphim with behavioral based
interviews.
Okay.
In my near decade of recruitingfor the chemical industry, this
is something I did frequentlyand my clients had great
(06:35):
outcomes, so we focused oninterview preparation.
We did the tell me about a timewhen kind of questions.
I expected him to have thetypical problems being overly
wordy or way too vague, buthonestly, he crushed them.
His answers were thoughtful,structured, and impressive.
He did want to have multiplequestions to prepare ahead of
(06:58):
time.
I wanted to be more in themoment, but he resisted with
time and preparation.
He had great answers, even if itdid sound a bit like he was
reading them.
We had about five or sixsessions and I'd give him
feedback on how to improve.
Then he'd come back and he'd bebetter, but something fell off.
He then wanted me to review histechnical presentation, and he
(07:21):
tried to cram so many chemicalstructures on a slide.
It looked like it was an entireposter presentation that one
would find on the outskirts of atechnical meeting, but this was
on one slide, and he had about60 slides like this, prepared
for a 30 minute presentation.
Now, he jumped right intotechnical details without
(07:41):
sharing the context of why itwas important or what it was
for.
He was going through all hisvarious types of synthesis that
he had done in the past 10years.
On one slide.
I listened politely for a coupleminutes, and then I had to
interject.
I asked a question.
He lost his place in his verycarefully worded script and
(08:03):
became defensive.
His shoulders crouched forward.
His voice got sharp, bluntlanguage, obvious displeasure.
He felt challenged, and I wasmerely trying to help him.
And I switched gears.
I paused and asked, how dointerviews feel for you
(08:23):
physically?
He looked down, then up, andthen he said like, I'm about to
be attacked.
That's when the real story cameout.
He shared that in pastinterviews, especially high
stakes ones, he froze.
Sweat would pour down, his voicewould shake, his heart would
pound, his brain would fog up,and he would forget the
(08:46):
rehearsed stories.
He would fumble simpleresponses.
He felt the people were judginghim negatively by asking any
question, and he felt, theythought he was stupid.
Wow.
And so I relayed to him that ifhe was selected for an onsite
after three rounds of interviewsbefore that, and they were
(09:09):
paying for his travel, havingthe entire technical team
invited for his presentation andan entire day of interviews with
various members of the team.
This isn't something they do forjust anyone.
He said, I know the material.
I've practiced it all, but inthe moment it's like I'm
watching myself unravel and Ican't stop it.
(09:32):
I ask gently.
And so how will this time bedifferent?
Perhaps we should have a gameplan to mitigate this known
problem.
What do you do to prepare forthe mental side of that moment?
He shrugged.
I don't, I just try harder nexttime.
But trying harder wasn'tworking.
(09:54):
He left that session withinsights, but he didn't return.
I followed up after his next biginterview.
I really wanted him to do well.
I saw his potential and hislimitations, and I tried to help
him get better, but he wasn'tready to receive it.
It had gone poorly.
(10:14):
His flights had been delayed.
He got two hours of sleep.
He felt judged the entire time.
His presentation ran long.
He panicked.
He fell asleep in an interviewand he knew in his gut he had
blown it.
That was the moment my lightbulb went off.
This wasn't about ability, thiswasn't about effort.
(10:37):
This wasn't even about clarity.
He sabotaged his opportunity tosucceed.
This was about mental fitness,and it wasn't just him.
It was the high performer whonever negotiated their salary
because they feared conflict.
The leader who couldn't delegatebecause they didn't trust anyone
(10:58):
else to do it right.
The talented creative whoprocrastinated for weeks
terrified their work would neverbe good enough.
These weren't strategic gaps.
They were internal patterns,saboteur driven thoughts,
emotional hijacks, invisibleroadblocks, and I realized if I
(11:21):
was going to help my clientssustain their success, I had to
help them build the mentalmuscles to match it.
Because being intellectuallycapable doesn't automatically
mean that you've built theresilience to stay steady when
it counts.
After that pivotal interviewprep experience watching one of
(11:42):
the most capable, driven peopleI had ever met, freeze and a
high stakes moment, despitethorough preparation, I saw the
deeper pattern.
He had the qualifications, hehad the clarity, he had the
story, what made the differencewas having peace in his mind,
(12:03):
and so I began searching.
There has got to be a way, thisis not an isolated case, and
that's when I learned aboutpositive intelligence or PQ.
I started with the book byShirzad Chamine.
He's a Stanford professor, andright there on the cover it
said, why only 20% of teams andindividuals ever reach their
(12:25):
true potential and how you canachieve yours.
That was it.
The golden ticket.
Yes, I want that.
Before we go further, let's talkabout something you may already
know, emotional intelligence orEQ.
You've likely heard of it, andit is the ability to recognize,
understand, and manage your ownemotions and the emotions of
(12:47):
others.
EQ plays an important role ineffective leadership,
communication, and teamwork.
It helps us relate, resolveconflicts and make thoughtful
decisions.
But here's the catch.
EQ is just part of the picture.
Because you can know what to doand still struggle to do it in
the moment.
Have you ever logically knownthe right way to respond?
(13:10):
Only to get unexpectedlytriggered and react.
Instead, maybe a coworker asks aquestion and you snap.
Maybe a family member makes acomment and you feel your chest
tighten with unspokenfrustration.
That flash of tension, the surgeof emotion, it hijacks your
clarity and can affect yourperformance, relationships, and
(13:33):
wellbeing.
That's where positiveintelligence or PQ comes in.
PQ builds on EQ by giving youthe tools to actually shift your
brain's response in real time.
It helps you stay grounded,focused, and calm, especially
under pressure.
It's the daily practice ofstrengthening your mental
(13:54):
muscles so your mind becomesyour partner, not a force that
derails you.
At its core, PQ helps youstrengthen the voice of your
inner sage, the calm, wise,creative part of you, and quiet
the influence of your saboteurs.
The mental habits that createstress, self-doubt,
(14:14):
procrastination, perfectionism,fear, and others.
And those saboteurs, they cansound convincing.
You better get this right,you're behind.
Why can't you just be better?
Push through.
Don't show weakness.
They often disguise themselvesas logic, excellence, or tough
love, but what they actually dois clutter your mental space and
(14:38):
drain your energy.
That chemist had tremendouspotential in moments of
pressure, though internal noisetook over the volume of his
saboteurs rose with the rightsupport, he could learn to shift
and stay grounded.
That's what PQ trains you to do.
(14:58):
It's about retraining your mindto respond from a place of
clarity.
The Positive IntelligenceProgram offers simple effective
tools to spot early signs ofmental interference, interrupt
the pattern with quick proventechniques, and strengthen your
sage brain through daily mentalrepetitions.
(15:20):
This approach is grounded inneuroscience and has been tested
by more than half a millionparticipants all around the
world.
After just two months of dailypractice, participants report a
91% improvement in stressmanagement.
An 85% increase in happiness,83% stronger self-confidence,
(15:42):
90% boost in emotionalintelligence.
I experienced this firsthand.
Within two months of practicingpq, my systolic blood pressure
dropped by 20 points.
20 without new medication ordrastic lifestyle changes.
The significant difference wasmy daily PQ practice.
(16:06):
That shift gave me something Ididn't even realize.
I was craving quiet, notsilence, but a quiet mind.
A mind that no longer jumpedinto judgment.
A mind that made space forchoice, a mind that supported
(16:29):
rather than sabotaged.
For the first time in a longtime, I felt present.
Present in conversations,present with my family, present
in decisions.
I didn't need to become someoneelse.
I simply reconnected with who Itruly was.
(16:50):
That clarity helped me see thatI couldn't continue guiding
clients without including mentalfitness as a pillar in the Next
Success Method because authenticsuccess isn't just about what
you do, it's about how you livewhile doing it.
And that includes how yourespond to challenges, how you
(17:11):
speak to yourself in hardmoments, how you return to
center when life tilts offbalance.
Imagine what your life would be like if your career
aligned with who you are, whatyou do best, and actually fueled
the life you want.
At Next Success, we support allages and stages through career
(17:35):
transitions from studentsexploring majors or careers to
job seekers actively searchingor re-imagining their next move
to professionals committed toself-awareness and leadership
growth.
Stay connected and explorewhat's possible at
nextsuccesscareers.com andfollow@nextsuccessmethod on
LinkedIn, YouTube, Instagram,and Facebook.
(18:01):
You are listening to Your NextSuccess with Dr.
Caroline Sangal.
Let's continue the journey toyour authentic success.
That's the gift of mentalfitness, and it's not just a
nice to have, it's become afoundational pillar of the Next
Success Method because when youare standing at a turning point,
(18:21):
it is rarely just about yourresume or what job comes next.
It is about who you are.
What you're built to do andwhether your life actually
reflects what matters most toyou.
That's why this work bringstogether four essential pillars.
We begin with your naturalabilities, the way your brain is
wired to solve problems, makedecisions, and perform at your
(18:42):
best.
Most people never get a chanceto see this clearly, but once
you do, everything starts tomake more sense.
Why some roles energize you andothers quietly drain you even
when you're good at them.
Then we look at communication,behavior, how you naturally
interact with others and howthat shapes your relationships.
(19:03):
When you understand yourbehavioral style and you learn
to recognize the styles of thosearound you, collaboration gets
easier, influence becomes morenatural, and tension does not
derail your day.
The third pillar is mentalfitness because all the clarity
in the world doesn't help if youare constantly derailed by
(19:25):
doubt, stress, or reactivity.
This is where we build emotionalstrength, the ability to respond
intentionally, recover quickly,and lead from a grounded place
no matter what challenges comeup.
And finally, we build anintegrated vision, one that ties
it all together.
(19:46):
A clear picture of the life youwant and a career that actually
supports it, not just in theory,but in day-to-day reality.
Each of these pillars ispowerful on its own, but when
they come together, that's whenthe transformation happens.
You start making decisions froma place of deep alignment.
You start showing updifferently, and instead of
(20:09):
feeling stuck or off track, youfinally feel like you're moving
in the direction that is yours.
That's what the Next SuccessMethod is about, and that's what
I want for every client, everylistener, every person who's
ready for more.
Meet the saboteurs, your brain'shidden roadblocks.
Have you ever had a moment whensomething small flipped a switch
(20:32):
in your mind?
Maybe someone asked an innocentquestion and you responded
sharply.
Maybe you felt a wave of energyrise just before a big
presentation, maybe a familymember made a comment that
stayed with you much longer thanexpected.
You knew how you wanted to showup, and yet in that moment,
something else stepped in.
(20:54):
It was almost like autopilottook over a hidden reflex, a
deeply wired impulse that didnot align with your deeper
intention.
That's exactly where mentalfitness becomes a game changer
and the heart of it.
Your saboteurs.
Saboteurs are the thoughtpatterns that increase stress,
drain energy, limit clarity, andmake the path forward, feel
(21:15):
heavier.
They were formed through pastexperiences, internalized
beliefs and learned ways ofcoping, but they don't define
you.
They are simply mental habits.
Once you recognize them, you canunlock a completely new level of
clarity and conscious choice.
(21:35):
Let's go deeper.
Imagine you are standing at theedge of an opportunity.
Maybe it's a conversation you'vebeen meaning to have, a
promotion.
You're aligned for a dream,you're finally ready to bring to
life, and as you step forward,something whispers.
Are you sure you're ready?
That voice.
It might sound cautious, butmore often it's your inner
(21:58):
judge.
In the positive intelligence PQframework, there are 10 core
saboteurs.
Judge the master saboteur.
It critiques you, others andyour circumstances.
It says.
You could do better or thiswon't work.
It sounds like discernment, butit feels like defeat.
Yet recognizing it gives you thefirst true opening to shift.
(22:22):
Controller brings decisivenessand drive offering structure and
leadership, but when it isoverused, it tightens the grip
and drowns out collaboration,inviting flow makes leadership
magnetic.
Stickler, values precision andhigh standards, incredible for
details and systems.
(22:42):
And when given flexibility,these same strengths become
scalable.
Pleaser, empathetic,kindhearted, and loyal.
when balanced creates a lastingconnection, centering self-care
with that creates wholeness.
Hyper achiever focused,productive, and results driven
achievement can be meaningfulwhen rooted in your authentic
(23:05):
worth rather than proving value.
Victim, deeply feeling, andemotionally attuned.
When partnered with resilience,emotions become fuel instead of
weight.
Hyper-rational, insightful, andlogical with strong problem
solving, adding emotionalcontext makes your brilliance
relatable and influential.
(23:26):
Hypervigilant, observant andaware, a brilliant early warning
system.
When paired with trust, itbecomes a grounded readiness
instead of anxiety.
Restless, curious and energetic,passionate about exploring
what's next.
Presence makes that adventurericher.
Avoider seeks peace and harmony.
(23:47):
Valuing calm is powerful,especially when balanced with
courageous action.
Most people recognize themselvesin several saboteurs and the
judge, that one tends to beuniversal.
One of my clients, a director inbiotech once told me, I thought
I was just exhausted.
But when I saw how often mypleaser and hyper achiever were
(24:08):
steering the ship, it finallymade sense.
Once I named them, I couldbreathe again.
I could choose differently, andthat is the shift choice.
This is not about suppressingthoughts, it's about shifting
your inner response.
So how do you shift?
(24:30):
That's where your sage comes in.
The sage is your inner calm,clarity and compassion.
It's not something you have toearn or learn.
It is already there.
You've glimpsed it in momentswhen you felt confident,
connected, and clear.
You've heard it in your innerknowing.
(24:50):
You've felt it in moments whenthe right words came without
force.
Your sage has five superpowers.
Empathize, creating safety,kindness, and compassion for
yourself and others.
Explore getting curious ratherthan critical.
Innovate, finding new solutionsand creative paths forward.
(25:13):
Navigate.
Making decisions aligned withyour deeper purpose and values.
Activate, taking intentionalaction with clarity and courage.
Through daily PQ reps.
Simple sensory based exercisesthat anchor you to the present
moment.
You strengthen the neuralpathways associated with your
sage.
(25:34):
You literally build the mentalmuscles that allow you to
respond instead of react.
Another client, a VP in tech,once shared, I used to believe
my edge came from pressure, butwhen I trained my mind with pq,
I realized I perform better froma place of calm.
Stress made me sharp, butpresence made me powerful.
(25:56):
Mental fitness builds thatpresence and the ripple effect
is tangible.
You handle conflict with moregrace, you lead with steady
confidence.
You stop spiraling afterdifficult conversations.
You gain energy back for whatyou love and it doesn't take
hours.
It starts with 15 minutes a day.
(26:18):
When you build and sustain thesemuscles, over time, the people
around you will start noticingyour clarity, your calm, your
strength.
Building the muscles that keepyou grounded.
Let's pause for a second.
What if the best version of you,the one who shows up, clear,
(26:39):
calm, focused, and ready, wasalways within reach.
That version is already withinyou.
It is a return to who you trulyare.
It is always accessible, nomatter the circumstances.
It's your natural state.
Reclaimed and strengthenedthrough daily practice.
(27:01):
That is the power of mentalfitness.
Let's explore how to build it.
You've already met thesaboteurs, the patterns that
pull your focus and cloud yourjudgment.
You've met your sage, the calm,clear, compassionate, inner
guide who always leads you backto yourself.
So how do you strengthen thesage muscle?
(27:23):
Let me tell you about Mary.
Mary is a high level executivewho came to me feeling depleted.
She led teams and deliveredresults, but something felt off.
She craved clarity and ease.
She wanted to reconnect with herbest self.
We introduced positiveintelligence into her day.
Micro practices called PQ reps.
(27:43):
These are simple exercises thatshift your attention and calm
your nervous system in realtime.
Her favorite was a 90 secondbreath practice focused only on
the feeling of her fingertipsrubbing together.
That quiet, consistent actbrought her back to center.
Instead of reacting in meetingsshe shared, I could breathe.
(28:06):
I thought more clearly, I ledbetter and it felt good.
That's the essence of mentalfitness.
Each time you return topresence, you strengthen a new
neural pathway.
It's like lifting a weight atthe gym, but for your mind.
Over time, your responsepatterns shift.
(28:26):
You feel grounded, creative,open, and strong.
Others feel it too.
One client's partner said, youjust seem lighter, more
grounded.
Another took on new leadershiproles because of the way she
handled pressure with clarity,calm, and curiosity.
This shift shows up innavigating difficult
(28:47):
conversations with presencegiving, and receiving feedback
with grace, making decisionswith peace and confidence.
Resting deeply and walking withpurpose, leading and loving with
authenticity, and it all startswith simple daily practices.
The PQ program starts withseveral weeks of building a
(29:10):
foundation.
You learn your saboteurs, youawaken your sage, you build the
muscle to return to your bestself on purpose.
By around two months, mostpeople experience sharper focus
and creative flow, greater peacein everyday moments, more
fulfilling relationships,renewed energy and clarity, and
(29:31):
it continues.
Mental fitness becomes a steadysource of strength.
You access your calm center morequickly.
You shift from reaction toresponse.
You lead from wisdom.
You live with more ease.
Let's return to our earlierstory.
Remember the brilliant chemistwhose interviews kept
(29:51):
unraveling.
He had the skills, theexpertise, the track record.
What he needed was the internalsteadiness, the kind that comes
from mental fitness.
When he embraced the PQframework, things changed.
He walked into interviews calm,clear, and grounded.
He could think on his feet andhe showed up fully That inner
(30:13):
shift created outer success.
Okay, so today we covered whyhigh performers can still
self-sabotage in high stakesmoments, the difference between
emotional intelligence andmental fitness.
How saboteurs hijack your mindand drain your energy.
The 10 core saboteurs and howthey show up in daily life, how
(30:36):
to activate your inner sage andrespond with presence, daily
mental fitness practices torewire your brain, stories of
transformation from real clientsand how this work can help you
stay grounded, clear andpowerful, no matter the
pressure.
So let me ask you what becomespossible when your mind is
(30:57):
supportive, your heart is steadyand your energy is clear?
That's what you strengthenthrough mental fitness.
And you are ready to begin.
If you're curious about this,you can access two free
assessments and schedule a callto learn more.
There is a link in the shownotes.
Your next step is simple.
(31:17):
Take the free saboteurassessment, gain immediate
insights into what's beenshaping your thoughts and
energy, and book a freediscovery call.
We will explore how the PQprogram helps you lead and live
from your best self.
Let your mind become your ally.
Let your calm become yourstrength.
Let your Next Success feel likehome.
(31:40):
You're just getting started.
You are steady.
You are ready.
You are built for more.
Keep going.
You're not done yet.
Thanks for listening to Your Next Success with Dr.
Caroline Sangal.
Remember, authentic success isyours to define and includes
aligning your career to supportthe life you want.
What if the thing standingbetween you and your Next
Success isn't about workingharder, but thinking clearer?
What if your ability to staycalm, present, and grounded,
especially when the pressure ishigh?
Is the real secret to unlockingeverything you've been chasing.
(00:25):
Today I am sharing a story thatchanged everything for me.
It revealed a hidden force thatderails even the most brilliant
minds.
And once you recognize it, yourawareness expands and everything
begins to align.
Caroline (00:44):
Have you ever wondered, is this it?
That question is the beginningof Your Next Success.
I am Dr.
Caroline Sangal, and thispodcast is your space to pause,
reflect, and create the careerand life you were made for.
(01:06):
We explore real stories,intentional transitions, and
practical insights to help youstep into alignment, purpose and
peace.
Welcome to your Next Success,the podcast that helps you
question what's next, reconnectwith, who you truly are, and
design the life and career youwere created for.
(01:27):
I'm Dr.
Caroline Sangal, careerstrategist, scientist, and
creator of the Next SuccessMethod.
And this episode is one I'vewanted to share for a long time
because what I learned from oneclient.
changed the way I coach forever.
Let's begin.
In this episode, you'll discoverthe hidden force that holds even
(01:49):
the most capable professionalsback, how it shows up in high
stakes moments, and thebreakthrough framework that can
help you stay grounded andpowerful under pressure.
We'll explore the real storybehind self-sabotage, introduce
the positive intelligence PQmodel, and show you how to build
(02:10):
the mental muscles that turninner chaos into clarity.
When I first developed the NextSuccess Method, I focused on
three transformative insightsthat each of us has natural
abilities, hardwired ways thatour brains problem solve,
communicate, and contribute.
That our communication behaviorstyle shapes how we build
(02:33):
relationships and navigatechallenges, and that we need an
integrated vision for life.
One that prioritizes alignmentbetween who we are and the work
we choose to do.
This approach was based on aholistic view that people are so
much more than their job title,salary, or location.
(02:58):
To truly make aligned decisionsabout their future, they needed
to expand the lens beyond theresume and consider the whole
person what gave them energy,what drained them, what mattered
most when they had clarity aboutwho they were at their core,
(03:19):
they could begin to build avision for their life first, and
then align their career tosupport it.
And the results were powerful.
Some clients launched newbusinesses, others pivoted into
work they loved, and somefinally understood why certain
roles felt heavy.
Even if they looked successfulon paper, they began making
(03:44):
intentional decisions about thework they wanted to do and the
life they wanted to live.
Some even rediscovered hobbiesthat they had long left behind
and began feeling likethemselves again.
But something kept surfacing, arecurring pattern.
I would witness incredibletransformation followed by
(04:06):
unexpected stalls.
Clients would gain momentum,then hesitate, delay their next
step, or sabotage their ownprogress just as things were
coming together and it made mepause.
What was happening beneath thesurface?
(04:26):
Here's what I came tounderstand.
Mental clarity createsdirection.
Mental fitness makes itsustainable.
You can know who you are andwhat you want.
You can craft the perfectstrategy.
You can even practice yourmessage a hundred times.
But when the pressure hits, whenthe lights go on, and the stakes
(04:49):
are high, what matters most isyour ability to stay clear and
calm in the moment.
That's the difference betweenknowing and embodying, and that
difference came into full viewwhile working with a client.
I'll never forget, he was asynthetic chemist, PhD,
(05:10):
brilliant, soft spoken, deeplythoughtful, his resume sparkled,
but his story went far beyondbullet points.
He grew up in a remote village,in a developing country, was
raised by a single mother whoworked tirelessly to provide for
him.
They didn't have much, but hehad an insatiable hunger to
(05:31):
learn.
He would pull newspapers fromthe trash bins just to read
anything he could get his handson, he devoured, and that's how
he learned about the world,through fragments of ink stained
pages.
He earned his education againstall odds.
He received scholarships and wasinvited to study
(05:52):
internationally.
His life was a mosaic of grit,brilliance and perseverance.
When he came to me, I wouldn'tsay that he was struggling, he
was excelling, but somethinginside of him knew there was
more.
He had been working at acontract manufacturing company,
was creating chemical compoundsfor larger pharmaceutical
(06:14):
companies, but the work thatonce had been exciting, had
become monotonous.
He wanted more meaning,challenge and growth.
He came to me asking me to helphim with behavioral based
interviews.
Okay.
In my near decade of recruitingfor the chemical industry, this
is something I did frequentlyand my clients had great
(06:35):
outcomes, so we focused oninterview preparation.
We did the tell me about a timewhen kind of questions.
I expected him to have thetypical problems being overly
wordy or way too vague, buthonestly, he crushed them.
His answers were thoughtful,structured, and impressive.
He did want to have multiplequestions to prepare ahead of
(06:58):
time.
I wanted to be more in themoment, but he resisted with
time and preparation.
He had great answers, even if itdid sound a bit like he was
reading them.
We had about five or sixsessions and I'd give him
feedback on how to improve.
Then he'd come back and he'd bebetter, but something fell off.
He then wanted me to review histechnical presentation, and he
(07:21):
tried to cram so many chemicalstructures on a slide.
It looked like it was an entireposter presentation that one
would find on the outskirts of atechnical meeting, but this was
on one slide, and he had about60 slides like this, prepared
for a 30 minute presentation.
Now, he jumped right intotechnical details without
(07:41):
sharing the context of why itwas important or what it was
for.
He was going through all hisvarious types of synthesis that
he had done in the past 10years.
On one slide.
I listened politely for a coupleminutes, and then I had to
interject.
I asked a question.
He lost his place in his verycarefully worded script and
(08:03):
became defensive.
His shoulders crouched forward.
His voice got sharp, bluntlanguage, obvious displeasure.
He felt challenged, and I wasmerely trying to help him.
And I switched gears.
I paused and asked, how dointerviews feel for you
(08:23):
physically?
He looked down, then up, andthen he said like, I'm about to
be attacked.
That's when the real story cameout.
He shared that in pastinterviews, especially high
stakes ones, he froze.
Sweat would pour down, his voicewould shake, his heart would
pound, his brain would fog up,and he would forget the
(08:46):
rehearsed stories.
He would fumble simpleresponses.
He felt the people were judginghim negatively by asking any
question, and he felt, theythought he was stupid.
Wow.
And so I relayed to him that ifhe was selected for an onsite
after three rounds of interviewsbefore that, and they were
(09:09):
paying for his travel, havingthe entire technical team
invited for his presentation andan entire day of interviews with
various members of the team.
This isn't something they do forjust anyone.
He said, I know the material.
I've practiced it all, but inthe moment it's like I'm
watching myself unravel and Ican't stop it.
(09:32):
I ask gently.
And so how will this time bedifferent?
Perhaps we should have a gameplan to mitigate this known
problem.
What do you do to prepare forthe mental side of that moment?
He shrugged.
I don't, I just try harder nexttime.
But trying harder wasn'tworking.
(09:54):
He left that session withinsights, but he didn't return.
I followed up after his next biginterview.
I really wanted him to do well.
I saw his potential and hislimitations, and I tried to help
him get better, but he wasn'tready to receive it.
It had gone poorly.
(10:14):
His flights had been delayed.
He got two hours of sleep.
He felt judged the entire time.
His presentation ran long.
He panicked.
He fell asleep in an interviewand he knew in his gut he had
blown it.
That was the moment my lightbulb went off.
This wasn't about ability, thiswasn't about effort.
(10:37):
This wasn't even about clarity.
He sabotaged his opportunity tosucceed.
This was about mental fitness,and it wasn't just him.
It was the high performer whonever negotiated their salary
because they feared conflict.
The leader who couldn't delegatebecause they didn't trust anyone
(10:58):
else to do it right.
The talented creative whoprocrastinated for weeks
terrified their work would neverbe good enough.
These weren't strategic gaps.
They were internal patterns,saboteur driven thoughts,
emotional hijacks, invisibleroadblocks, and I realized if I
(11:21):
was going to help my clientssustain their success, I had to
help them build the mentalmuscles to match it.
Because being intellectuallycapable doesn't automatically
mean that you've built theresilience to stay steady when
it counts.
After that pivotal interviewprep experience watching one of
(11:42):
the most capable, driven peopleI had ever met, freeze and a
high stakes moment, despitethorough preparation, I saw the
deeper pattern.
He had the qualifications, hehad the clarity, he had the
story, what made the differencewas having peace in his mind,
(12:03):
and so I began searching.
There has got to be a way, thisis not an isolated case, and
that's when I learned aboutpositive intelligence or PQ.
I started with the book byShirzad Chamine.
He's a Stanford professor, andright there on the cover it
said, why only 20% of teams andindividuals ever reach their
(12:25):
true potential and how you canachieve yours.
That was it.
The golden ticket.
Yes, I want that.
Before we go further, let's talkabout something you may already
know, emotional intelligence orEQ.
You've likely heard of it, andit is the ability to recognize,
understand, and manage your ownemotions and the emotions of
(12:47):
others.
EQ plays an important role ineffective leadership,
communication, and teamwork.
It helps us relate, resolveconflicts and make thoughtful
decisions.
But here's the catch.
EQ is just part of the picture.
Because you can know what to doand still struggle to do it in
the moment.
Have you ever logically knownthe right way to respond?
(13:10):
Only to get unexpectedlytriggered and react.
Instead, maybe a coworker asks aquestion and you snap.
Maybe a family member makes acomment and you feel your chest
tighten with unspokenfrustration.
That flash of tension, the surgeof emotion, it hijacks your
clarity and can affect yourperformance, relationships, and
(13:33):
wellbeing.
That's where positiveintelligence or PQ comes in.
PQ builds on EQ by giving youthe tools to actually shift your
brain's response in real time.
It helps you stay grounded,focused, and calm, especially
under pressure.
It's the daily practice ofstrengthening your mental
(13:54):
muscles so your mind becomesyour partner, not a force that
derails you.
At its core, PQ helps youstrengthen the voice of your
inner sage, the calm, wise,creative part of you, and quiet
the influence of your saboteurs.
The mental habits that createstress, self-doubt,
(14:14):
procrastination, perfectionism,fear, and others.
And those saboteurs, they cansound convincing.
You better get this right,you're behind.
Why can't you just be better?
Push through.
Don't show weakness.
They often disguise themselvesas logic, excellence, or tough
love, but what they actually dois clutter your mental space and
(14:38):
drain your energy.
That chemist had tremendouspotential in moments of
pressure, though internal noisetook over the volume of his
saboteurs rose with the rightsupport, he could learn to shift
and stay grounded.
That's what PQ trains you to do.
(14:58):
It's about retraining your mindto respond from a place of
clarity.
The Positive IntelligenceProgram offers simple effective
tools to spot early signs ofmental interference, interrupt
the pattern with quick proventechniques, and strengthen your
sage brain through daily mentalrepetitions.
(15:20):
This approach is grounded inneuroscience and has been tested
by more than half a millionparticipants all around the
world.
After just two months of dailypractice, participants report a
91% improvement in stressmanagement.
An 85% increase in happiness,83% stronger self-confidence,
(15:42):
90% boost in emotionalintelligence.
I experienced this firsthand.
Within two months of practicingpq, my systolic blood pressure
dropped by 20 points.
20 without new medication ordrastic lifestyle changes.
The significant difference wasmy daily PQ practice.
(16:06):
That shift gave me something Ididn't even realize.
I was craving quiet, notsilence, but a quiet mind.
A mind that no longer jumpedinto judgment.
A mind that made space forchoice, a mind that supported
(16:29):
rather than sabotaged.
For the first time in a longtime, I felt present.
Present in conversations,present with my family, present
in decisions.
I didn't need to become someoneelse.
I simply reconnected with who Itruly was.
(16:50):
That clarity helped me see thatI couldn't continue guiding
clients without including mentalfitness as a pillar in the Next
Success Method because authenticsuccess isn't just about what
you do, it's about how you livewhile doing it.
And that includes how yourespond to challenges, how you
(17:11):
speak to yourself in hardmoments, how you return to
center when life tilts offbalance.
Imagine what your life would be like if your career
aligned with who you are, whatyou do best, and actually fueled
the life you want.
At Next Success, we support allages and stages through career
(17:35):
transitions from studentsexploring majors or careers to
job seekers actively searchingor re-imagining their next move
to professionals committed toself-awareness and leadership
growth.
Stay connected and explorewhat's possible at
nextsuccesscareers.com andfollow@nextsuccessmethod on
LinkedIn, YouTube, Instagram,and Facebook.
(18:01):
You are listening to Your NextSuccess with Dr.
Caroline Sangal.
Let's continue the journey toyour authentic success.
That's the gift of mentalfitness, and it's not just a
nice to have, it's become afoundational pillar of the Next
Success Method because when youare standing at a turning point,
(18:21):
it is rarely just about yourresume or what job comes next.
It is about who you are.
What you're built to do andwhether your life actually
reflects what matters most toyou.
That's why this work bringstogether four essential pillars.
We begin with your naturalabilities, the way your brain is
wired to solve problems, makedecisions, and perform at your
(18:42):
best.
Most people never get a chanceto see this clearly, but once
you do, everything starts tomake more sense.
Why some roles energize you andothers quietly drain you even
when you're good at them.
Then we look at communication,behavior, how you naturally
interact with others and howthat shapes your relationships.
(19:03):
When you understand yourbehavioral style and you learn
to recognize the styles of thosearound you, collaboration gets
easier, influence becomes morenatural, and tension does not
derail your day.
The third pillar is mentalfitness because all the clarity
in the world doesn't help if youare constantly derailed by
(19:25):
doubt, stress, or reactivity.
This is where we build emotionalstrength, the ability to respond
intentionally, recover quickly,and lead from a grounded place
no matter what challenges comeup.
And finally, we build anintegrated vision, one that ties
it all together.
(19:46):
A clear picture of the life youwant and a career that actually
supports it, not just in theory,but in day-to-day reality.
Each of these pillars ispowerful on its own, but when
they come together, that's whenthe transformation happens.
You start making decisions froma place of deep alignment.
You start showing updifferently, and instead of
(20:09):
feeling stuck or off track, youfinally feel like you're moving
in the direction that is yours.
That's what the Next SuccessMethod is about, and that's what
I want for every client, everylistener, every person who's
ready for more.
Meet the saboteurs, your brain'shidden roadblocks.
Have you ever had a moment whensomething small flipped a switch
(20:32):
in your mind?
Maybe someone asked an innocentquestion and you responded
sharply.
Maybe you felt a wave of energyrise just before a big
presentation, maybe a familymember made a comment that
stayed with you much longer thanexpected.
You knew how you wanted to showup, and yet in that moment,
something else stepped in.
(20:54):
It was almost like autopilottook over a hidden reflex, a
deeply wired impulse that didnot align with your deeper
intention.
That's exactly where mentalfitness becomes a game changer
and the heart of it.
Your saboteurs.
Saboteurs are the thoughtpatterns that increase stress,
drain energy, limit clarity, andmake the path forward, feel
(21:15):
heavier.
They were formed through pastexperiences, internalized
beliefs and learned ways ofcoping, but they don't define
you.
They are simply mental habits.
Once you recognize them, you canunlock a completely new level of
clarity and conscious choice.
(21:35):
Let's go deeper.
Imagine you are standing at theedge of an opportunity.
Maybe it's a conversation you'vebeen meaning to have, a
promotion.
You're aligned for a dream,you're finally ready to bring to
life, and as you step forward,something whispers.
Are you sure you're ready?
That voice.
It might sound cautious, butmore often it's your inner
(21:58):
judge.
In the positive intelligence PQframework, there are 10 core
saboteurs.
Judge the master saboteur.
It critiques you, others andyour circumstances.
It says.
You could do better or thiswon't work.
It sounds like discernment, butit feels like defeat.
Yet recognizing it gives you thefirst true opening to shift.
(22:22):
Controller brings decisivenessand drive offering structure and
leadership, but when it isoverused, it tightens the grip
and drowns out collaboration,inviting flow makes leadership
magnetic.
Stickler, values precision andhigh standards, incredible for
details and systems.
(22:42):
And when given flexibility,these same strengths become
scalable.
Pleaser, empathetic,kindhearted, and loyal.
when balanced creates a lastingconnection, centering self-care
with that creates wholeness.
Hyper achiever focused,productive, and results driven
achievement can be meaningfulwhen rooted in your authentic
(23:05):
worth rather than proving value.
Victim, deeply feeling, andemotionally attuned.
When partnered with resilience,emotions become fuel instead of
weight.
Hyper-rational, insightful, andlogical with strong problem
solving, adding emotionalcontext makes your brilliance
relatable and influential.
(23:26):
Hypervigilant, observant andaware, a brilliant early warning
system.
When paired with trust, itbecomes a grounded readiness
instead of anxiety.
Restless, curious and energetic,passionate about exploring
what's next.
Presence makes that adventurericher.
Avoider seeks peace and harmony.
(23:47):
Valuing calm is powerful,especially when balanced with
courageous action.
Most people recognize themselvesin several saboteurs and the
judge, that one tends to beuniversal.
One of my clients, a director inbiotech once told me, I thought
I was just exhausted.
But when I saw how often mypleaser and hyper achiever were
(24:08):
steering the ship, it finallymade sense.
Once I named them, I couldbreathe again.
I could choose differently, andthat is the shift choice.
This is not about suppressingthoughts, it's about shifting
your inner response.
So how do you shift?
(24:30):
That's where your sage comes in.
The sage is your inner calm,clarity and compassion.
It's not something you have toearn or learn.
It is already there.
You've glimpsed it in momentswhen you felt confident,
connected, and clear.
You've heard it in your innerknowing.
(24:50):
You've felt it in moments whenthe right words came without
force.
Your sage has five superpowers.
Empathize, creating safety,kindness, and compassion for
yourself and others.
Explore getting curious ratherthan critical.
Innovate, finding new solutionsand creative paths forward.
(25:13):
Navigate.
Making decisions aligned withyour deeper purpose and values.
Activate, taking intentionalaction with clarity and courage.
Through daily PQ reps.
Simple sensory based exercisesthat anchor you to the present
moment.
You strengthen the neuralpathways associated with your
sage.
(25:34):
You literally build the mentalmuscles that allow you to
respond instead of react.
Another client, a VP in tech,once shared, I used to believe
my edge came from pressure, butwhen I trained my mind with pq,
I realized I perform better froma place of calm.
Stress made me sharp, butpresence made me powerful.
(25:56):
Mental fitness builds thatpresence and the ripple effect
is tangible.
You handle conflict with moregrace, you lead with steady
confidence.
You stop spiraling afterdifficult conversations.
You gain energy back for whatyou love and it doesn't take
hours.
It starts with 15 minutes a day.
(26:18):
When you build and sustain thesemuscles, over time, the people
around you will start noticingyour clarity, your calm, your
strength.
Building the muscles that keepyou grounded.
Let's pause for a second.
What if the best version of you,the one who shows up, clear,
(26:39):
calm, focused, and ready, wasalways within reach.
That version is already withinyou.
It is a return to who you trulyare.
It is always accessible, nomatter the circumstances.
It's your natural state.
Reclaimed and strengthenedthrough daily practice.
(27:01):
That is the power of mentalfitness.
Let's explore how to build it.
You've already met thesaboteurs, the patterns that
pull your focus and cloud yourjudgment.
You've met your sage, the calm,clear, compassionate, inner
guide who always leads you backto yourself.
So how do you strengthen thesage muscle?
(27:23):
Let me tell you about Mary.
Mary is a high level executivewho came to me feeling depleted.
She led teams and deliveredresults, but something felt off.
She craved clarity and ease.
She wanted to reconnect with herbest self.
We introduced positiveintelligence into her day.
Micro practices called PQ reps.
(27:43):
These are simple exercises thatshift your attention and calm
your nervous system in realtime.
Her favorite was a 90 secondbreath practice focused only on
the feeling of her fingertipsrubbing together.
That quiet, consistent actbrought her back to center.
Instead of reacting in meetingsshe shared, I could breathe.
(28:06):
I thought more clearly, I ledbetter and it felt good.
That's the essence of mentalfitness.
Each time you return topresence, you strengthen a new
neural pathway.
It's like lifting a weight atthe gym, but for your mind.
Over time, your responsepatterns shift.
(28:26):
You feel grounded, creative,open, and strong.
Others feel it too.
One client's partner said, youjust seem lighter, more
grounded.
Another took on new leadershiproles because of the way she
handled pressure with clarity,calm, and curiosity.
This shift shows up innavigating difficult
(28:47):
conversations with presencegiving, and receiving feedback
with grace, making decisionswith peace and confidence.
Resting deeply and walking withpurpose, leading and loving with
authenticity, and it all startswith simple daily practices.
The PQ program starts withseveral weeks of building a
(29:10):
foundation.
You learn your saboteurs, youawaken your sage, you build the
muscle to return to your bestself on purpose.
By around two months, mostpeople experience sharper focus
and creative flow, greater peacein everyday moments, more
fulfilling relationships,renewed energy and clarity, and
(29:31):
it continues.
Mental fitness becomes a steadysource of strength.
You access your calm center morequickly.
You shift from reaction toresponse.
You lead from wisdom.
You live with more ease.
Let's return to our earlierstory.
Remember the brilliant chemistwhose interviews kept
(29:51):
unraveling.
He had the skills, theexpertise, the track record.
What he needed was the internalsteadiness, the kind that comes
from mental fitness.
When he embraced the PQframework, things changed.
He walked into interviews calm,clear, and grounded.
He could think on his feet andhe showed up fully That inner
(30:13):
shift created outer success.
Okay, so today we covered whyhigh performers can still
self-sabotage in high stakesmoments, the difference between
emotional intelligence andmental fitness.
How saboteurs hijack your mindand drain your energy.
The 10 core saboteurs and howthey show up in daily life, how
(30:36):
to activate your inner sage andrespond with presence, daily
mental fitness practices torewire your brain, stories of
transformation from real clientsand how this work can help you
stay grounded, clear andpowerful, no matter the
pressure.
So let me ask you what becomespossible when your mind is
(30:57):
supportive, your heart is steadyand your energy is clear?
That's what you strengthenthrough mental fitness.
And you are ready to begin.
If you're curious about this,you can access two free
assessments and schedule a callto learn more.
There is a link in the shownotes.
Your next step is simple.
(31:17):
Take the free saboteurassessment, gain immediate
insights into what's beenshaping your thoughts and
energy, and book a freediscovery call.
We will explore how the PQprogram helps you lead and live
from your best self.
Let your mind become your ally.
Let your calm become yourstrength.
Let your Next Success feel likehome.
(31:40):
You're just getting started.
You are steady.
You are ready.
You are built for more.
Keep going.
You're not done yet.
Thanks for listening to Your Next Success with Dr.
Caroline Sangal.
Remember, authentic success isyours to define and includes
aligning your career to supportthe life you want.
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