May 16, 2025 • 23 mins
Taking care of yourself isn't selfish—it's necessary. When you feel good about yourself, you radiate confidence that nothing can shake. "When your image is together, nothing anyone says is gonna turn your boat over."
This heartfelt conversation explores the multidimensional nature of self-care and its profound impact on mental wellness. From spiritual practices like prayer and Bible reading to physical activities such as walking or cycling, everyone has personal methods that help them manage stress and anxiety. What emerges clearly is that looking good and feeling good about yourself creates a foundation of confidence that helps you navigate life's challenges with grace.
Family connections provide crucial emotional support, with relationships spanning generations and continents offering a sense of belonging and identity. However, the discussion candidly addresses the importance of discernment in relationships—recognizing when constant negativity from others requires creating healthy distance. As one guest wisely notes, "There comes a time where you do have to remove yourself or spend less time with them."
The conversation takes a practical turn, highlighting that self-care doesn't require wealth—just intentionality. Simple practices like regular nail care, changing bed sheets twice weekly, and maintaining a clean living environment contribute significantly to mental well-being. These habits aren't luxuries but necessities that signal self-respect and create environments conducive to emotional health.
Perhaps most powerful is the emphasis on self-compassion. "Teach myself how to live past that mistake that I made... Forgive yourself, no one's perfect." This gentle approach to personal growth allows for learning without the burden of shame, creating space for authentic development and healing.
Ready to transform your approach to self-care? Listen now to discover how small, consistent actions can dramatically improve your mental wellness, relationships, and quality of life. What one self-care practice will you commit to today?
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hello everyone.
I'm Dr Beatrice Ippolit andthis is your World.
What self-care practice do youfind most helpful for managing
stress and anxiety?
Speaker 2 (00:21):
I don't want to sound redundant, okay, but I'm going
to go back to reading my Bibleand praying.
That's what helps me the most.
But that's me.
You know everyone has.
You know what helps them.
Some people it's maybe taking aride on their bicycle.
Some people might be just goinghiking or just going for a walk
(00:43):
, taking their dog for a walk,or just walking by themselves,
or, but I just told you whatmine is.
And um, then I finish praying,reading my word, and I feel like
, you know, on top of the worldand I can now get my image
together, which that's anotherthing that makes me feel on top
(01:03):
of the world.
When my image is together, Ifeel great, I feel confident.
You know nothing that anyonesays it's gonna turn my boat
over because you already writeit in your balls exactly exactly
, and when you look good and youfeel good, you know about
yourself.
I don't want to say take on theworld, because you don't want to
(01:24):
take on the world, okay.
But you feel like, okay, I'mready for whatever the day has
for me and, by the grace of God,there's a lot of positive that
the day has for us, so look forit man, a man, a man.
Speaker 1 (01:39):
Do that.
How do you build and maintain asupport network of friends,
family and professionals?
Speaker 2 (01:46):
I do have a lot of family.
I didn't mention when I spokeabout myself.
I was born in Panama, panamaCity, panama, central America.
In Spanish we say El Puente delMundo, the Bridge of the World,
because we separate theAtlantic from the Pacific, our
(02:07):
country and so I have family inPanama, I have family here, I
have family all over and I'm avery family-oriented person.
I love my family, not only myimmediate family, my children
and grandchildren, et cetera,but my extended family.
Speaker 1 (02:24):
How many?
Speaker 2 (02:25):
children, do you?
Speaker 1 (02:25):
have in your family.
Speaker 2 (02:27):
I have four.
I started boy-girl.
I thought I was done, and fiveyears later here comes the next
girl and the next boy.
So I have boy-girl-girl-boy.
Speaker 1 (02:38):
And they call you sister.
Speaker 2 (02:41):
I love that, thank you, yes, I love that.
Thank you, yes.
But the funny thing is that myeldest daughter had my
granddaughter as a teenager andso my granddaughter is now 22,.
But she grew up with her unclesand her auntie and her mom
calling me mom.
So she calls me mom, which isfine with me, because when we're
(03:03):
out and about she says mom,people believe she's my daughter
, you know.
And my daughter says that'syour granddaughter and I say
it's OK, she's my daughter still, you know.
And so I love my family and myfriends.
A lot of them are from childhoodand I'm blessed to say that I
(03:25):
wouldn't say a lot, but a few,like I would say like four of
them are from childhood and I'mblessed to say that I wouldn't
say a lot, but a few, like Iwould say like four of them from
childhood, two from third grade, two from fourth grade and one
from fifth grade and we stillconnected, even though they may
be in Florida or California orwherever we still connect, or in
(03:48):
Brooklyn, you know, which isclose enough, you know, but we
don't see each other as often,but we're still connected.
And you know my businessassociates.
I love my business associates.
I would call them sisters andbrothers in Christ first, and
then, uh, friends and businessassociates.
But business is business, youknow.
But what I find that's veryimportant is that you don't
(04:10):
really want to expose yourselftoo much to people, or at all to
people that constantly speaknegative, that constantly may
put you down or just findcriticism about you.
I make it a point to liftpeople up whenever I can, even
(04:31):
if it's one word.
I'm not talking about lying now,that's a best attitude yes,
telling someone the truth, likeyou, Beatrice, you're fabulous
All day, every day, you talkabout me.
You're fabulous All day, everyday, you talk about me.
You're fabulous.
Speaker 1 (04:44):
You know what you know.
Let me take it as a compliment.
Thank you.
Speaker 2 (04:48):
Yes, you're welcome, and I don't believe in lying to
people.
I tell the truth, but I lookfor where I can lift them up,
you know.
And so if you are aroundsomeone that's constantly
putting you down or findingfault, I would say, okay, if God
wants to use you to minister tothem, great, you know.
But I don't know how someonecan stand that for too long it
(05:13):
not affect them, you know.
So I believe maybe those peopleyou have to know avoid.
Speaker 1 (05:18):
You have right.
You have to know when to callit right right and pray for them
.
Speaker 2 (05:23):
Pray because, at the end of the day, that doesn't
serve them right either, becauseobviously they may not be
looking at themselves thatfondly either most of the time
that's the case.
So we want to let God use youto help lift them up and show
them what's positive about them.
But there comes a time whereyou do have to remove yourself
(05:47):
or spend less time with them.
If you can and I found that youknow, with God, all things are
possible.
He can use you to turn themaround and show them that there
are things in life that arepositive.
And yeah, I might be somewhatoverweight, yes, I might have,
you know, but at the end of theday, you know, can you say
(06:09):
something good about me, youknow?
And because I'm going to saysomething good about you and
teach you how to lift people up,because I believe that's what
we should do, how to lift peopleup, because I believe that's
what we should do.
Someone once said that there'snothing she didn't believe in
criticism.
She didn't believe in I'm goingto say constructive criticism.
(06:30):
We learned that in collegeabout constructive criticism.
But she said there's nothingconstructive about criticism.
And if I'm not, if it's okayfor me to say.
It was a lady, her name wasMary Kay Ash, and she said
there's nothing constructiveabout criticism.
And I thought about it and Isaid you know what?
(06:52):
She's right.
When I find something that Ican't say good about someone, I
pray about it for them.
But when I can say somethinggood, I lift them up, because I
do believe that God gave us allgifts, talents and abilities and
I do believe there's so muchgood in all of us and the enemy
I'm just going to say the enemysteals, kills and destroys, but
(07:15):
in the same scripture, if I maysay John 10.10, the Lord came to
give us life, and moreabundantly.
Speaker 1 (07:24):
But sometimes we allow the enemy to use us.
No, it's true.
Speaker 2 (07:29):
It's true.
It's so true, and that's why Ibelieve it's so important to be
discerning, to discern and know,to be discerning, to discern
and know.
You know, when it is a positivespiritual being, my God is
Jesus, okay, or it's you knowthe enemy trying to just bring
people down, let people feelthat they're nothing, or they
(08:00):
need drugs to live, or to take adrink every minute, or whatever
it is, or to binge.
You know I'm eating and youknow there's so many.
I guess you would say I don'twant to call them cushions.
There's so many things thatpeople turn to instead of
turning to.
What I believe is thatspiritual being, whatever your
God is, mine is Jesus, but thatwill help you deal with life and
(08:21):
all what comes with it.
But when you take care ofyourself coming back to our
topic, god when you take care ofyourself and you feel good and
you look good and you smell goodand you even look a little
younger than you are, okay, itmakes a difference.
It makes you feel like I cantake on the world you know,
whatever comes and help othersdo the same, yeah, so you want
(08:45):
to go around and spread thatblessing.
Speaker 1 (08:47):
Yes, my last question what role do you think
community and social connectionplay in maintaining good mental
health and good self-care?
Speaker 2 (08:59):
Well, coming back to what people think, you know
people say you shouldn't carewhat people think, but I believe
it does make a difference.
And when you're in a community,a community that values you and
respects you, that can go along way.
How do you obtain value andrespect from a community?
(09:22):
Again, self-care andSelf-respect.
And when you care aboutyourself, when you respect
yourself by not doing or doingcertain things, those that are
around you will follow in kindand See your value and see like,
wow, you know, she's someonethat I should respect.
(09:45):
You know and admire yourself-respect and then start to
feel the same about themselvesand show the same self-respect
for themselves, because thereare a lot of people that don't
have self-respect oh yeah youknow, exactly unfortunately yes
so it's crazy.
Speaker 1 (10:03):
It is, it's crazy uh, the other day, you know so, I
had a conversation with, uh,someone who asked me, beatrice,
what happened, and I was likewhat it's like where that
respect goes?
Women used to have a lot ofrespect, you know, for for
themselves, the way they speak,the way they behave, the way
(10:24):
they carry themselves, and itseemed it's gone.
What's going on?
And I had to pause and I'm likeyou're right.
We had a lengthy conversationabout it, which you know I won't
have time to address.
That will be a whole differenttopic yes, you know to to talk
(10:47):
about but I agree with you andnot only women.
So it's happened.
It was just a man who asked methat question because of
whatever that he is been dealingwith few women out there, but
young men too, or men in general.
You know the decency, you know.
(11:07):
So it seemed that you know welive in a world now.
You know bad behaviors is a lot, so it's like I can say
whatever I want, I can dowhatever that I want.
So it's like no question willbe asked and I don't owe nobody
any explanation.
You know I'm old?
Speaker 2 (11:27):
You're not old at all .
Speaker 1 (11:28):
Compared to those who are in their 30s.
Speaker 2 (11:31):
Oh, I understand, but you're not old at all.
Speaker 1 (11:34):
So it's like, you know, sometimes when I talk, you
know people may think that, oh,she's old fashioned, but I
don't think it's not being oldfashioned.
I remember one time you know itwas like maybe two years ago I
was walking on Flatbush.
It was Flatbush and Avenue J.
There is a big gas station atthat corner, okay, you know,
(11:56):
flatbush and J, avenue J, and Isaw there was a big truck
entering the gas station and, Idon't know, I was going to an
event that day.
So I was all sued up, you know,looking like a wheel
professional and the truckdriver it happened there was a
lady who was like right in frontof me, walking almost naked.
(12:22):
I realized later on he used meto make a statement.
Until the lady replied back towhat he said.
He just looked at me and saidthank you for being classy and
beautiful.
Oh, praise god.
Until the lady used the word Ftoward him, I realized there was
(12:45):
somebody walking around nakedand I'm like it didn't address
her, but she felt that he wastalking to him and I'm like,
even if he was talking to you,you felt that the message was
for you.
You know, in a way he acts anddirectly he asks you, when you
(13:09):
walk out on the street, to putsome clothes on right.
But for you to turn around andcurse him out was not important,
was not important, and you knowthe sad part of it.
(13:29):
She had a child with her wow andI'm like as a mother you're
supposed to be a world model.
Speaker 2 (13:38):
Exactly Lead by example.
You know yes.
Speaker 1 (13:42):
So not only you were walking with no clothes on, but
for somebody to make a point andyou felt so upset and felt the
need to address him by usingprofanity in front of your own
child.
Speaker 2 (14:02):
Lord have mercy.
Speaker 1 (14:03):
Lord have mercy.
Lord have mercy.
So that's the end.
Lord have mercy.
Speaker 2 (14:09):
I just want to add one little thing, beatrice Nails
and feet, and take care of yournails, even if you can't go to
a nail salon because of yourbudget.
I think it's better to cut themall off, keep them clean, you
know.
And the same with your toes andfeet.
Some people just like it likethat Clean and natural and cut.
(14:33):
But that's important because wecarry a lot of bacteria and
germs through both of them Untilyou can.
Some people just like it likethat Clean and natural and cut,
but that's important because wecarry a lot of bacteria and
germs through both of them andthat's how people end up with
fungus and all kinds of thingsin their feet.
So, even if you can't go, do ityourself, you know, buy some
nail files, clippers, you know,and take care of your nails and
feet.
I did that for quite some timemyself.
(14:53):
Until now I go to the salon ona regular, but this is very
important.
Speaker 1 (14:59):
Very much so.
Speaker 2 (14:59):
You don't need a lot of money to take care of
yourself, you know.
Speaker 1 (15:03):
And sometimes you may not have the money to do the
long and fancy ones Right right,you know, but the simple
manicure.
Speaker 2 (15:11):
The simple manicure.
Speaker 1 (15:14):
You know, I think they do both for $40 or 30
something dollars sometimes.
You, you know.
Speaker 2 (15:19):
So, like you say, yourself treat yourself right
and it doesn't matter if you are, even if it's one someone, so
it's like once a month it it'sgood.
Speaker 1 (15:30):
Because, let's say, for example, we make budget for
other things.
A bottle of Huvrazi Gromaniamay cost us $68, but you will
buy that almost every week.
Yes, you know so, which is notgood for you.
You know for you to consume.
You know a whole bottle for youknow in a week, but you still
(15:56):
do it because you say I love todrink.
It's the same thing you have tolove to taking care of yourself
and your hair, if you can't goto the salon, wash it, put it
back in a ponytail and it looksso cute.
Speaker 2 (16:10):
But whatever it takes , if you can't go to a salon,
you know they have so many slickback hairdos.
Wearing your hair like naturaland low is another way.
That's very um becoming andbeautiful.
Speaker 1 (16:24):
You see your features even better, you know, and so
there are ways to take care ofyourself, your hygiene, in every
part of your, your body inaddition to that, I understand
that you know everything youknow is on a budget, but there
are some budgets that we can cutdown on, like I mentioned, the
big battle of germania for 68 or70 dollars.
Speaker 2 (16:44):
Right, instead of buying they want for 70 dollars,
buy the one for 28 dollars.
Speaker 1 (16:50):
Wow, you know then you will have 40 dollars to
taking care of their hair.
You know to taking care oftheir hair.
You know to take care of theirnails.
You know to have a nicepedicure and manicure or to have
a nice haircut.
Or go to the barber shop.
You know have, you know, havethe barber shave you.
Speaker 2 (17:07):
You don't have to just do a little tidying a
little because it makes you feelgood, also your environment, a
little because it makes you feelgood also your environment,
your bedroom.
You know, sometimes it can getout of hand one day at a time.
Speaker 1 (17:18):
You know, cuz that's part of self-care, change the
sheets yes, self-care at leastyou should change that sheet,
like you know, twice a week,right, because bacteria?
Yeah, twice a week you shouldhave new sheets on the bed Sweep
(17:40):
, mop the floor and thepillowcases, change them, you
know, on a regular.
And what else should we mention?
Don't keep the garbage, you, no, no it's true, some people love
to eat in their room, you knowand I understand that.
(18:01):
Yes, you get comfortablewatching tv.
You bring the food into yourhome that attracts what we don't
want yeah don't know.
Take that tracks what we don't.
Take the garbage out.
Yes, you know so, because youdon't want, you know so, to be
in that environment.
And the towers?
Yes, don't use the towers, thesame towers for a whole week,
(18:23):
two weeks or a month.
Yes, or taking that, or it'snot dirty because it's black or
dark, blue or dark.
Oh my gosh.
Speaker 2 (18:30):
No, yes, you no, yes, you know change that, for that
reason alone, you should havelight colored towels, right you
know?
So that you can know it's time.
Yes, no.
Speaker 1 (18:41):
but if you make it like a wood, that towels need to
be changed every two days?
Yes, every two days.
You just change it.
Speaker 2 (18:48):
It's like when you go to a hotel you expect that
Every two days you change them.
Speaker 1 (18:53):
So, keep your environment clean.
It doesn't need to be fancy, sothey're simple.
Sometimes they're better, greatfor your health.
Keep it clean.
Speaker 2 (19:04):
Keep it clean, mental health as well, it's good for
your physical health.
Speaker 1 (19:08):
It's good for your mental health and, trust me, if
you keep your environment clean,you take care of yourself the
way that you're supposed to, youwill see the benefit of it.
You make time to nourish yourmind, your body and spirit.
Listen to your needs and takecare of yourself accordingly.
(19:31):
Seek support from friends,family or mental health
professional when needed or hasneeded.
Practice self-compassion.
Sometimes we're too hard onourselves, you know.
Whatever that happens.
So whatever mistake that youmade, you know that's what they
(19:53):
call it mistakes.
I understand.
You know what.
If I were to do that again, Iprobably will reconsider, but
it's already happened.
I cannot go and undo it, but Ihave to teach myself how to live
past that mistake that I made.
Teach myself how to live pastthat mistake that.
(20:14):
I made Practice self-compassionand treat yourself with kindness
and understanding.
Speaker 2 (20:19):
Yes, and forgiving yourself.
Speaker 1 (20:21):
Yeah, forgive yourself.
I can repeat that, yeah, forgiveyourself, no one's perfect.
No, no, no.
So it's like if you were youknow.
Oh, so what you know?
So you made a mistake.
You choose to be with the wrongperson.
No, there was something thatyou didn't kind of assess.
You know deeply but you realize, hey, you know what, I should
(20:42):
not be with that person.
That was a mistake that I made.
Now so it's okay.
So when I make a mistake, Idon't beat myself up over a
mistake that I made.
So I've learned from it.
Yes, absolutely, you know, tobetter my next move, Because
that's how we go.
You know that's how we go,Because if we were to beat up
(21:05):
ourselves for every mistake thatwe made, we will reach a point
where we'll have to killourselves.
Engage in activities that bringyou joy and fulfillment.
Some people love to go to themovies.
Some people love to go to theBroadway show.
Some people love to travel.
Some people love to go you knowI love to sit in a nice
(21:29):
restaurant.
I love Broadway shows, so I mayhave you know.
I may have things that I love.
You may have things that we allknow what we love.
Engage ourselves in thoseactivities, be around people who
will lift your spirit up.
You know, if you know, everytime you're around her and she's
(21:51):
always putting you down, it'stime to say you know what?
Hey, that's not the environmentthat I want to be, exactly, you
know.
So it was a pleasure Same here,you know to have that
conversation with you and I wantto thank you.
Speaker 2 (22:06):
I want to thank you for having these venues to help
the world at large.
You know God is really usingyou to make a difference and
thank you.
And thank you for the privilegeand the honor to be interviewed
by you.
It's been a pleasure, it was mypleasure.
Speaker 1 (22:22):
I remember the first time we met, so it was so funny.
We're not going to tell peoplehow we met.
We keep that as a secret.
Speaker 2 (22:30):
That's our secret.
That's our secret.
Speaker 1 (22:33):
And I remember you know like, you know the passion
that you had, you know thepassion you displayed that day
for self-care.
And I'm like, wait a minute.
And you were coming from thegym all dressed up.
I said, oh, I need to changesome of my gym's outfit attire.
(22:55):
Yes, so it's good.
So you look good.
So keep it up, thank you, andkeep on spreading the good
spirit around, and I assume thatyou have inspired many other
people.
So, hey, keep it up.
Thank you, praise God, thankyou, thank you for everything
that you do for the church, forthe community, for the people
around you.
Hey, keep it up, thank you,thank you.
Thank you for everything thatyou do for the church, for the
(23:15):
community, for the people aroundyou, for your family and for
your business, thank you.
Thank you so much.
You're so welcome.
Speaker 2 (23:22):
Praise God.
To God be all the glory, andit's a total pleasure.
And again, thank you, thank you.
Speaker 1 (23:31):
Okay, that's it for today.
It was with you, dr BeatriceIppolite, with your world.
Hello everyone.
I'm Dr Beatrice Ippolit andthis is your World.
What self-care practice do youfind most helpful for managing
stress and anxiety?
Speaker 2 (00:21):
I don't want to sound redundant, okay, but I'm going
to go back to reading my Bibleand praying.
That's what helps me the most.
But that's me.
You know everyone has.
You know what helps them.
Some people it's maybe taking aride on their bicycle.
Some people might be just goinghiking or just going for a walk
(00:43):
, taking their dog for a walk,or just walking by themselves,
or, but I just told you whatmine is.
And um, then I finish praying,reading my word, and I feel like
, you know, on top of the worldand I can now get my image
together, which that's anotherthing that makes me feel on top
(01:03):
of the world.
When my image is together, Ifeel great, I feel confident.
You know nothing that anyonesays it's gonna turn my boat
over because you already writeit in your balls exactly exactly
, and when you look good and youfeel good, you know about
yourself.
I don't want to say take on theworld, because you don't want to
(01:24):
take on the world, okay.
But you feel like, okay, I'mready for whatever the day has
for me and, by the grace of God,there's a lot of positive that
the day has for us, so look forit man, a man, a man.
Speaker 1 (01:39):
Do that.
How do you build and maintain asupport network of friends,
family and professionals?
Speaker 2 (01:46):
I do have a lot of family.
I didn't mention when I spokeabout myself.
I was born in Panama, panamaCity, panama, central America.
In Spanish we say El Puente delMundo, the Bridge of the World,
because we separate theAtlantic from the Pacific, our
(02:07):
country and so I have family inPanama, I have family here, I
have family all over and I'm avery family-oriented person.
I love my family, not only myimmediate family, my children
and grandchildren, et cetera,but my extended family.
Speaker 1 (02:24):
How many?
Speaker 2 (02:25):
children, do you?
Speaker 1 (02:25):
have in your family.
Speaker 2 (02:27):
I have four.
I started boy-girl.
I thought I was done, and fiveyears later here comes the next
girl and the next boy.
So I have boy-girl-girl-boy.
Speaker 1 (02:38):
And they call you sister.
Speaker 2 (02:41):
I love that, thank you, yes, I love that.
Thank you, yes.
But the funny thing is that myeldest daughter had my
granddaughter as a teenager andso my granddaughter is now 22,.
But she grew up with her unclesand her auntie and her mom
calling me mom.
So she calls me mom, which isfine with me, because when we're
(03:03):
out and about she says mom,people believe she's my daughter
, you know.
And my daughter says that'syour granddaughter and I say
it's OK, she's my daughter still, you know.
And so I love my family and myfriends.
A lot of them are from childhoodand I'm blessed to say that I
(03:25):
wouldn't say a lot, but a few,like I would say like four of
them are from childhood and I'mblessed to say that I wouldn't
say a lot, but a few, like Iwould say like four of them from
childhood, two from third grade, two from fourth grade and one
from fifth grade and we stillconnected, even though they may
be in Florida or California orwherever we still connect, or in
(03:48):
Brooklyn, you know, which isclose enough, you know, but we
don't see each other as often,but we're still connected.
And you know my businessassociates.
I love my business associates.
I would call them sisters andbrothers in Christ first, and
then, uh, friends and businessassociates.
But business is business, youknow.
But what I find that's veryimportant is that you don't
(04:10):
really want to expose yourselftoo much to people, or at all to
people that constantly speaknegative, that constantly may
put you down or just findcriticism about you.
I make it a point to liftpeople up whenever I can, even
(04:31):
if it's one word.
I'm not talking about lying now,that's a best attitude yes,
telling someone the truth, likeyou, Beatrice, you're fabulous
All day, every day, you talkabout me.
You're fabulous All day, everyday, you talk about me.
You're fabulous.
Speaker 1 (04:44):
You know what you know.
Let me take it as a compliment.
Thank you.
Speaker 2 (04:48):
Yes, you're welcome, and I don't believe in lying to
people.
I tell the truth, but I lookfor where I can lift them up,
you know.
And so if you are aroundsomeone that's constantly
putting you down or findingfault, I would say, okay, if God
wants to use you to minister tothem, great, you know.
But I don't know how someonecan stand that for too long it
(05:13):
not affect them, you know.
So I believe maybe those peopleyou have to know avoid.
Speaker 1 (05:18):
You have right.
You have to know when to callit right right and pray for them
.
Speaker 2 (05:23):
Pray because, at the end of the day, that doesn't
serve them right either, becauseobviously they may not be
looking at themselves thatfondly either most of the time
that's the case.
So we want to let God use youto help lift them up and show
them what's positive about them.
But there comes a time whereyou do have to remove yourself
(05:47):
or spend less time with them.
If you can and I found that youknow, with God, all things are
possible.
He can use you to turn themaround and show them that there
are things in life that arepositive.
And yeah, I might be somewhatoverweight, yes, I might have,
you know, but at the end of theday, you know, can you say
(06:09):
something good about me, youknow?
And because I'm going to saysomething good about you and
teach you how to lift people up,because I believe that's what
we should do, how to lift peopleup, because I believe that's
what we should do.
Someone once said that there'snothing she didn't believe in
criticism.
She didn't believe in I'm goingto say constructive criticism.
(06:30):
We learned that in collegeabout constructive criticism.
But she said there's nothingconstructive about criticism.
And if I'm not, if it's okayfor me to say.
It was a lady, her name wasMary Kay Ash, and she said
there's nothing constructiveabout criticism.
And I thought about it and Isaid you know what?
(06:52):
She's right.
When I find something that Ican't say good about someone, I
pray about it for them.
But when I can say somethinggood, I lift them up, because I
do believe that God gave us allgifts, talents and abilities and
I do believe there's so muchgood in all of us and the enemy
I'm just going to say the enemysteals, kills and destroys, but
(07:15):
in the same scripture, if I maysay John 10.10, the Lord came to
give us life, and moreabundantly.
Speaker 1 (07:24):
But sometimes we allow the enemy to use us.
No, it's true.
Speaker 2 (07:29):
It's true.
It's so true, and that's why Ibelieve it's so important to be
discerning, to discern and know,to be discerning, to discern
and know.
You know, when it is a positivespiritual being, my God is
Jesus, okay, or it's you knowthe enemy trying to just bring
people down, let people feelthat they're nothing, or they
(08:00):
need drugs to live, or to take adrink every minute, or whatever
it is, or to binge.
You know I'm eating and youknow there's so many.
I guess you would say I don'twant to call them cushions.
There's so many things thatpeople turn to instead of
turning to.
What I believe is thatspiritual being, whatever your
God is, mine is Jesus, but thatwill help you deal with life and
(08:21):
all what comes with it.
But when you take care ofyourself coming back to our
topic, god when you take care ofyourself and you feel good and
you look good and you smell goodand you even look a little
younger than you are, okay, itmakes a difference.
It makes you feel like I cantake on the world you know,
whatever comes and help othersdo the same, yeah, so you want
(08:45):
to go around and spread thatblessing.
Speaker 1 (08:47):
Yes, my last question what role do you think
community and social connectionplay in maintaining good mental
health and good self-care?
Speaker 2 (08:59):
Well, coming back to what people think, you know
people say you shouldn't carewhat people think, but I believe
it does make a difference.
And when you're in a community,a community that values you and
respects you, that can go along way.
How do you obtain value andrespect from a community?
(09:22):
Again, self-care andSelf-respect.
And when you care aboutyourself, when you respect
yourself by not doing or doingcertain things, those that are
around you will follow in kindand See your value and see like,
wow, you know, she's someonethat I should respect.
(09:45):
You know and admire yourself-respect and then start to
feel the same about themselvesand show the same self-respect
for themselves, because thereare a lot of people that don't
have self-respect oh yeah youknow, exactly unfortunately yes
so it's crazy.
Speaker 1 (10:03):
It is, it's crazy uh, the other day, you know so, I
had a conversation with, uh,someone who asked me, beatrice,
what happened, and I was likewhat it's like where that
respect goes?
Women used to have a lot ofrespect, you know, for for
themselves, the way they speak,the way they behave, the way
(10:24):
they carry themselves, and itseemed it's gone.
What's going on?
And I had to pause and I'm likeyou're right.
We had a lengthy conversationabout it, which you know I won't
have time to address.
That will be a whole differenttopic yes, you know to to talk
(10:47):
about but I agree with you andnot only women.
So it's happened.
It was just a man who asked methat question because of
whatever that he is been dealingwith few women out there, but
young men too, or men in general.
You know the decency, you know.
(11:07):
So it seemed that you know welive in a world now.
You know bad behaviors is a lot, so it's like I can say
whatever I want, I can dowhatever that I want.
So it's like no question willbe asked and I don't owe nobody
any explanation.
You know I'm old?
Speaker 2 (11:27):
You're not old at all .
Speaker 1 (11:28):
Compared to those who are in their 30s.
Speaker 2 (11:31):
Oh, I understand, but you're not old at all.
Speaker 1 (11:34):
So it's like, you know, sometimes when I talk, you
know people may think that, oh,she's old fashioned, but I
don't think it's not being oldfashioned.
I remember one time you know itwas like maybe two years ago I
was walking on Flatbush.
It was Flatbush and Avenue J.
There is a big gas station atthat corner, okay, you know,
(11:56):
flatbush and J, avenue J, and Isaw there was a big truck
entering the gas station and, Idon't know, I was going to an
event that day.
So I was all sued up, you know,looking like a wheel
professional and the truckdriver it happened there was a
lady who was like right in frontof me, walking almost naked.
(12:22):
I realized later on he used meto make a statement.
Until the lady replied back towhat he said.
He just looked at me and saidthank you for being classy and
beautiful.
Oh, praise god.
Until the lady used the word Ftoward him, I realized there was
(12:45):
somebody walking around nakedand I'm like it didn't address
her, but she felt that he wastalking to him and I'm like,
even if he was talking to you,you felt that the message was
for you.
You know, in a way he acts anddirectly he asks you, when you
(13:09):
walk out on the street, to putsome clothes on right.
But for you to turn around andcurse him out was not important,
was not important, and you knowthe sad part of it.
(13:29):
She had a child with her wow andI'm like as a mother you're
supposed to be a world model.
Speaker 2 (13:38):
Exactly Lead by example.
You know yes.
Speaker 1 (13:42):
So not only you were walking with no clothes on, but
for somebody to make a point andyou felt so upset and felt the
need to address him by usingprofanity in front of your own
child.
Speaker 2 (14:02):
Lord have mercy.
Speaker 1 (14:03):
Lord have mercy.
Lord have mercy.
So that's the end.
Lord have mercy.
Speaker 2 (14:09):
I just want to add one little thing, beatrice Nails
and feet, and take care of yournails, even if you can't go to
a nail salon because of yourbudget.
I think it's better to cut themall off, keep them clean, you
know.
And the same with your toes andfeet.
Some people just like it likethat Clean and natural and cut.
(14:33):
But that's important because wecarry a lot of bacteria and
germs through both of them Untilyou can.
Some people just like it likethat Clean and natural and cut,
but that's important because wecarry a lot of bacteria and
germs through both of them andthat's how people end up with
fungus and all kinds of thingsin their feet.
So, even if you can't go, do ityourself, you know, buy some
nail files, clippers, you know,and take care of your nails and
feet.
I did that for quite some timemyself.
(14:53):
Until now I go to the salon ona regular, but this is very
important.
Speaker 1 (14:59):
Very much so.
Speaker 2 (14:59):
You don't need a lot of money to take care of
yourself, you know.
Speaker 1 (15:03):
And sometimes you may not have the money to do the
long and fancy ones Right right,you know, but the simple
manicure.
Speaker 2 (15:11):
The simple manicure.
Speaker 1 (15:14):
You know, I think they do both for $40 or 30
something dollars sometimes.
You, you know.
Speaker 2 (15:19):
So, like you say, yourself treat yourself right
and it doesn't matter if you are, even if it's one someone, so
it's like once a month it it'sgood.
Speaker 1 (15:30):
Because, let's say, for example, we make budget for
other things.
A bottle of Huvrazi Gromaniamay cost us $68, but you will
buy that almost every week.
Yes, you know so, which is notgood for you.
You know for you to consume.
You know a whole bottle for youknow in a week, but you still
(15:56):
do it because you say I love todrink.
It's the same thing you have tolove to taking care of yourself
and your hair, if you can't goto the salon, wash it, put it
back in a ponytail and it looksso cute.
Speaker 2 (16:10):
But whatever it takes , if you can't go to a salon,
you know they have so many slickback hairdos.
Wearing your hair like naturaland low is another way.
That's very um becoming andbeautiful.
Speaker 1 (16:24):
You see your features even better, you know, and so
there are ways to take care ofyourself, your hygiene, in every
part of your, your body inaddition to that, I understand
that you know everything youknow is on a budget, but there
are some budgets that we can cutdown on, like I mentioned, the
big battle of germania for 68 or70 dollars.
Speaker 2 (16:44):
Right, instead of buying they want for 70 dollars,
buy the one for 28 dollars.
Speaker 1 (16:50):
Wow, you know then you will have 40 dollars to
taking care of their hair.
You know to taking care oftheir hair.
You know to take care of theirnails.
You know to have a nicepedicure and manicure or to have
a nice haircut.
Or go to the barber shop.
You know have, you know, havethe barber shave you.
Speaker 2 (17:07):
You don't have to just do a little tidying a
little because it makes you feelgood, also your environment, a
little because it makes you feelgood also your environment,
your bedroom.
You know, sometimes it can getout of hand one day at a time.
Speaker 1 (17:18):
You know, cuz that's part of self-care, change the
sheets yes, self-care at leastyou should change that sheet,
like you know, twice a week,right, because bacteria?
Yeah, twice a week you shouldhave new sheets on the bed Sweep
(17:40):
, mop the floor and thepillowcases, change them, you
know, on a regular.
And what else should we mention?
Don't keep the garbage, you, no, no it's true, some people love
to eat in their room, you knowand I understand that.
(18:01):
Yes, you get comfortablewatching tv.
You bring the food into yourhome that attracts what we don't
want yeah don't know.
Take that tracks what we don't.
Take the garbage out.
Yes, you know so, because youdon't want, you know so, to be
in that environment.
And the towers?
Yes, don't use the towers, thesame towers for a whole week,
(18:23):
two weeks or a month.
Yes, or taking that, or it'snot dirty because it's black or
dark, blue or dark.
Oh my gosh.
Speaker 2 (18:30):
No, yes, you no, yes, you know change that, for that
reason alone, you should havelight colored towels, right you
know?
So that you can know it's time.
Yes, no.
Speaker 1 (18:41):
but if you make it like a wood, that towels need to
be changed every two days?
Yes, every two days.
You just change it.
Speaker 2 (18:48):
It's like when you go to a hotel you expect that
Every two days you change them.
Speaker 1 (18:53):
So, keep your environment clean.
It doesn't need to be fancy, sothey're simple.
Sometimes they're better, greatfor your health.
Keep it clean.
Speaker 2 (19:04):
Keep it clean, mental health as well, it's good for
your physical health.
Speaker 1 (19:08):
It's good for your mental health and, trust me, if
you keep your environment clean,you take care of yourself the
way that you're supposed to, youwill see the benefit of it.
You make time to nourish yourmind, your body and spirit.
Listen to your needs and takecare of yourself accordingly.
(19:31):
Seek support from friends,family or mental health
professional when needed or hasneeded.
Practice self-compassion.
Sometimes we're too hard onourselves, you know.
Whatever that happens.
So whatever mistake that youmade, you know that's what they
(19:53):
call it mistakes.
I understand.
You know what.
If I were to do that again, Iprobably will reconsider, but
it's already happened.
I cannot go and undo it, but Ihave to teach myself how to live
past that mistake that I made.
Teach myself how to live pastthat mistake that.
(20:14):
I made Practice self-compassionand treat yourself with kindness
and understanding.
Speaker 2 (20:19):
Yes, and forgiving yourself.
Speaker 1 (20:21):
Yeah, forgive yourself.
I can repeat that, yeah, forgiveyourself, no one's perfect.
No, no, no.
So it's like if you were youknow.
Oh, so what you know?
So you made a mistake.
You choose to be with the wrongperson.
No, there was something thatyou didn't kind of assess.
You know deeply but you realize, hey, you know what, I should
(20:42):
not be with that person.
That was a mistake that I made.
Now so it's okay.
So when I make a mistake, Idon't beat myself up over a
mistake that I made.
So I've learned from it.
Yes, absolutely, you know, tobetter my next move, Because
that's how we go.
You know that's how we go,Because if we were to beat up
(21:05):
ourselves for every mistake thatwe made, we will reach a point
where we'll have to killourselves.
Engage in activities that bringyou joy and fulfillment.
Some people love to go to themovies.
Some people love to go to theBroadway show.
Some people love to travel.
Some people love to go you knowI love to sit in a nice
(21:29):
restaurant.
I love Broadway shows, so I mayhave you know.
I may have things that I love.
You may have things that we allknow what we love.
Engage ourselves in thoseactivities, be around people who
will lift your spirit up.
You know, if you know, everytime you're around her and she's
(21:51):
always putting you down, it'stime to say you know what?
Hey, that's not the environmentthat I want to be, exactly, you
know.
So it was a pleasure Same here,you know to have that
conversation with you and I wantto thank you.
Speaker 2 (22:06):
I want to thank you for having these venues to help
the world at large.
You know God is really usingyou to make a difference and
thank you.
And thank you for the privilegeand the honor to be interviewed
by you.
It's been a pleasure, it was mypleasure.
Speaker 1 (22:22):
I remember the first time we met, so it was so funny.
We're not going to tell peoplehow we met.
We keep that as a secret.
Speaker 2 (22:30):
That's our secret.
That's our secret.
Speaker 1 (22:33):
And I remember you know like, you know the passion
that you had, you know thepassion you displayed that day
for self-care.
And I'm like, wait a minute.
And you were coming from thegym all dressed up.
I said, oh, I need to changesome of my gym's outfit attire.
(22:55):
Yes, so it's good.
So you look good.
So keep it up, thank you, andkeep on spreading the good
spirit around, and I assume thatyou have inspired many other
people.
So, hey, keep it up.
Thank you, praise God, thankyou, thank you for everything
that you do for the church, forthe community, for the people
around you.
Hey, keep it up, thank you,thank you.
Thank you for everything thatyou do for the church, for the
(23:15):
community, for the people aroundyou, for your family and for
your business, thank you.
Thank you so much.
You're so welcome.
Speaker 2 (23:22):
Praise God.
To God be all the glory, andit's a total pleasure.
And again, thank you, thank you.
Speaker 1 (23:31):
Okay, that's it for today.
It was with you, dr BeatriceIppolite, with your world.
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