Stop Tip-Toeing Around Each Other’s Triggers (How to Create Real Emotional Safety in Marriage): Episode 404

You don’t just marry your partner’s strengths—you marry their triggers too.

If you’ve found yourself walking on eggshells to avoid setting them off… or shutting down because you feel like you’re too much… you’re not alone.

But let’s be clear: tip-toeing isn’t emotional maturity—it’s disconnection in disguise.

In this episode, we unpack how to create real emotional safety in your marriage—so you can stop spiraling and start feeling heard, seen, and safe again.

🎧 What You’ll learn:

• How to bring things up without triggering defensiveness
• What to do if your're the one who reacts quickly
• The subtle shift that turns arguments into deeper understanding
• How your perception—not just the event—shapes your emotional response
• A real-life story from our marriage about navigating triggers in real-time

Whether you’re the one walking on eggshells or the one who reacts fast, this episode will give you tools to stop avoiding hard conversations—and start transforming them into connection.

🛠️ Resources Mentioned in the Episode

1) If triggers are hijacking your conversations, these three guides will help you de-escalate, repair, and reconnect fast—especially in those “walking on eggshells” moments.

 → De-Escalating Conflicts Guide: https://thecouplesexperience.com/conflictguide

 

2) If you’re working through a hard season in your marriage — the Rebuilding Us 30-Day Challenge was made for you.

For 30 days, you’ll rebuild trust, improve communication, and reconnect emotionally through simple, guided steps each day. Start healing and moving forward together:

 → Rebuilding Us: www.MeetTheFreemans.com/Rebuilding

 

3) Meet Us In Person — October 5th Couples Workshop

Want to go beyond podcasts and guides? Come experience a full-day, in-person marriage workshop with us in Chandler, AZ. You’ll do private, guided exercises, learn powerful tools, and walk out feeling closer than you’ve felt in a long time. Spots are limited and always sell out.

→ Reserve your seats now for the Couples Workshop: https://www.thecouplesworkshop.com

 

4) You can also view all of our other resources here: https://www.meetthefreemans.com/links

 

Episode Time Stamps:

00:00 – Are you tiptoeing around your partner’s emotions?

01:10 – The problem with trying to “keep the peace” in marriage

02:24 – How we accidentally train each other to hide the truth

04:00 – When you’re scared of your partner’s reactions (or they’re scared of yours)

05:13 – What emotional eggshells actually sound like in real conversations

06:28 – The silent damage of unspoken resentment

07:42 – Why you both need to feel emotionally safe to be honest

09:03 – It’s not about walking on eggshells—it’s about building emotional maturity

10:21 – A secure marriage isn’t trigger-free—it’s repair-friendly

11:45 – How to shift your tone, so feedback doesn’t land as an attack

13:12 – Real example: giving feedback without provoking defensiveness

15:01 – “I want to be able to bring things up without it becoming a blow-up”

16:30 – The difference between emotional regulation and emotional suppression

18:18 – Why tiptoeing keeps your marriage stuck

19:20 – You both play a role in the dynamic—here’s how to change it

21:04 – Your tone might be more triggering than your words

22:47 – Tools for building a secure marriage where honesty is welcome