December 23, 2020 • 50 mins
Wading through the newest holiday movies, debating whether some old favorites have wrongfully earned the title Christmas Movie, and seeing if putting a christmas movie and non-Christmas movie together makes it more holiday than not.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:07):
The Large Nerdron Collider Podcast is a production of I
Heart Radio. Hey everybody, welcome to The Large Nerdron Collider Podcast,
the podcast that's all about the geeky stuff happening in
the world around us and how excited we are about it.
(00:29):
I am Ariel casting and with me as always is
my co host, Holly Jolly Jonathan Strickland. Yep, Um, got
a belly leca a bowl full of jelly. That's what
That's what lockdown does to me. Hey, Harriel, I got
a question for you. So here's your question. To start
(00:53):
off this episode. Let us say that, for some cruel
twist of fate, you are limited to only being able
to watch one holiday special or film each year. What
would you have picked for this year? Oh golly, oh
that's such a hard one, Jonathan, I know, way to go. Um. Now,
(01:19):
keep in mind next year you would be able to
choose a different one, but you can only have one
this year. I'm gonna say Scrooged, Scrooged, the Bill Murray Classic. Okay,
that's a that's a decent answer. That's a decent answer.
(01:39):
It's one that that's actually very divisive to I know
people who have very strong feelings about that one, because
it is they feel a bit too mean spirited. But
I think the anarchic nature of that plus the really
weird meta fourth wall breaking ending is kind of interesting.
(01:59):
Yeah yeah, I mean, just to keep it fresh. Like,
that's one that I haven't watched that much recently because
like you said, it's it's a little bit divisive, So
I've watched a lot more, you know, Charlie Brown Christmas
and things like that. So just it's a clean change
of pace for a year. Got it? What holiday movie
(02:21):
would you watch for this year as your only holiday movie? Ariel,
I'm so glad you asked me that question. I really
I've been agonizing over this since I asked you about
three minutes ago. I would pick immittt Otters jug Band Christmas,
but it would absolutely have to be the version that
originally aired on HBO back in the eighties that has
(02:44):
all the stuff in it, including all the interstitial moments
with Kermit the Frog, because if you've only seen him
at Hotter Post the HBO special, then you may not
even know that Kermit was in it. Because that to
the Henson Company split off, like the the Immitt Auto
property split away. From the Muppet part, and then you
(03:06):
had this complicated rights issue. And unfortunately it also meant
that typically the version of emmett Utter that you can
find these days, whether it's on DVD or streaming or whatever,
cuts out some of the jokes, and I don't understand why. Like,
there's typically one song that gets cut at least, and
there's one there's one joke that literally without the joke,
(03:31):
the scene doesn't make sense. No, I'm aware of this.
I can't remember the joke, but I remember thinking that
was incongruous. And then we've had this conversation before. Because
I feel like you would pick emmett Utter every year
for your soul holiday movie, and probably for your only
movie for the entire year. I might occasionally swap it
(03:53):
out for the Scrooge the musical with the thank you
very much, Thank you very much that's song. I love
that song, and I love that version of Christmas Carol.
There are lots of different great versions. Yeah, that musical
one is a lot of fun, I mean hot take,
And people who know me know that I have this opinion.
I am not a fan of the Muppet Christmas Carol,
(04:16):
even though I love the Muppets me neither neither. I'm
more of a traditionalist m it well, and I mean
I don't I don't even mind like the jokes and stuff,
and I do appreciate the fact that they they incorporate
Charles Dickens into that version of Christmas Caroll, so you
get to hear more lines that you normally wouldn't hear
(04:39):
because no one would. It's it's descriptions that no one
would ever speak in dialogue, right. That is cool. However,
I just feel like the Muppets aren't muppety enough in that, like,
like they don't go far enough in the Muppets thing
for it to feel like a real Muppet movie, not
like Muppet Treasure Island, I feel is way more more
liberal of the Muppets. But my favorite Muppet movie is
(05:03):
Muppet Treasure Island. And see that's the thing the same
same here, I really, I mean, my favorite is still
the original Muppet movie, but Muppet Treasure Island I feel
they got it right right that I feel like they
didn't go hard enough with Christmas Carroll. Also, I mean,
I know people who absolutely love his performance, but Mike
Cocaine was not my favorite Scrooge by a long shot.
(05:25):
I don't like picking favorite Scrooges. Um, it's like picking
a favorite child. I think there are plenty of old
men who are very curmudgeed le and play the role
quite well, and a few women too. There have been
a few versions of Christmas Carol with a female Scrooge,
and those are Yeah. And also there are plenty of
curmudging lee older people who play Scrooge very well. And
(05:49):
you've you've been in productions of Christmas Carroll, so you
also have that that perspective. Yeah, I've played uh, Mrs Fezziwig,
I've played Mrs Cratchett, I've played to Go to Christmas Future,
I've played the Charwoman. Yeah, Concertina street caroller. So you've
got you've got you've got practice of of ominously pointing
(06:11):
in the distance downpat Yeah, so I'm a little bit Well.
They weren't real stilts. They were like plywood stilts that
then got caught under the like the long black robe.
It was a wonderful experience. I never fell over personally. Um,
this is also crazy, guys, because most of you probably
(06:33):
don't know this, but Ariel is approximately seven ft tall already,
so I'm only five. Um, but so I'm a little biased.
But you know, you ask what movie I'd watch every year,
I feel like it's kind of an unfair question because
we've gotten a whole lot of new holiday movies this year,
and not just the Hallmark Lifetime Slew that we normally get. No,
(06:57):
but the Hallmark Lifetime Slew does account for a out
of all holiday movies every year, but that's just by volume. Yeah,
but I mean sometimes if you want something uplifting, you
just want some uplifting background, that's great because you're guaranteed
to get that with a Hallmarker Lifetime movie. That's true.
I mean, like there might not be a whole lot
(07:17):
of of meat on the bone there, but you can
be pretty certain you know what the emotional beats of
those films are gonna be. They're kind of like the
holiday equivalent to romance novels, where they all follow a
pretty similar pattern and you know how they're going to
turn out. Now. Granted, some of the holiday movies that
are also uh popular on streaming this year, because that's
(07:41):
that's how that's how we're all enjoying these days. Um,
some of them, some of them go a little dark.
There are a couple that are are either emotionally really
going to to tear at you, or in one case,
you've got a Santa Claus who's it was. It was
an action movie star kicking butt, which you know, a
(08:04):
lot of years I might go for this year, I know,
I said Scrooge, I'm kind of feeling uplifting. I'm willing
to let one of these new movies kind of take
Scrooges place, yeah, to kind of kind of sum things.
I think soothing is something that we could all use.
This year. It's been a it's been a I don't
know if you guys out there have noticed, it's been
a weird year, y'all. M it really has. So we
(08:28):
are we are recording this a little bit before it
airs because we want to spend time with our families
for Christmas as well, you know, whatever form that takes.
But um, we we wanted to talk about some of
the holiday movies coming out. UM one of which is
actually a TV special event it will have aired by
(08:51):
the time that this episode airs, which is The Grinch
Musical event with Matthew Morrison as the Grinch. They showed
a commercial for it if you watch the Macy's Day
Parade this year on television, they showed a commercial for it.
It got some mixed reviews, and you know, I'm I'm
(09:11):
a little mixed on my opinion about it as well.
I haven't seen it yet. Might might have by the
time you listen to this, but um, I don't know.
I love the Grunch and I think that the actions
and I think that the music translates very well to stage.
But any time I've seen an exception of one person
(09:32):
who plays the Granch amazingly, which is a mutual acquaintance
of Jonathan and I Judah, he plays an amazing Granch.
But otherwise, anytime I see a live action version of
the Granch, it feels fake to me. Yeah, well it's
a person in a large, green, fuzzy muppet suit. Yeah,
I I'm I don't have any desire to see live
(09:57):
action versions of the Grunch. I'm fine with the rich cartoon. Um.
I think it's I think it's a classic. I'm not
saying that no one should ever adapt it for other forms.
I don't believe that. It's just I don't have any
interest in it. It doesn't like when Jim Carey's films
came out. I didn't really have any interest in seeing
(10:17):
that when the musical first a stage, even with people
like Patrick Page, who is a phenomenal actor. Um, he
plays Hades in Hades Town. He was the Grinch. Like
I watched. Yeah, I watched a clip from the Macy's
Parade from two thousand fifteen, and they did the who
(10:41):
Celebrates Christmas or who Loves Christmas song and it's the
Who's by the way in case you were wondering, um,
And and at the end of it they also did
a little bit of your I mean one Mr Grench
and Patrick Page was playing the Grinch. That version of
the makeup and costume I thought looked pretty terrible. Uh.
But then again, also the video I was watching was
(11:03):
really bad quality. It was on YouTube. It was some
someone who just captured it off their TV or whatever. Um,
it was not great. And uh, I was just blown
away that Patrick Page had played that part because I
that somehow escaped my attention when it was happening. Um.
But yeah, I have nothing against Matthew Morrison. I think
he's a very good performer, and I don't have anything
(11:25):
against um, the other folks who were in it. I mean,
I don't know if you know this areal. One of
the other cast members of this production is Dennis O'Hare,
who was one of two actors playing the dog and
Dennis No. The other actor is also a human being.
(11:46):
Uh Dennis so here for those who don't know well.
First of all, he was in American Horror Story the
first season as a supporting character. But I think of
him as Charles J. Guteaux from Assassin's the same production
that Neil Patrick Harris was in, and he did a
great job in that. I look at him and I
(12:06):
go he would play a good Grunch For as as
much as I like a stage of the I will
admit that I did not see the Macy Stay Parade
version of the Grunch musical. I've only seen the granch
on stage in adaptations of suskal Um. But I think
it's just some uncanny Valley costume stuff for me. Maybe
maybe it's just never been the right costume design. I agree.
(12:29):
I will probably watch it. I'm just gonna say I
will probably watch it because I like encouraging them to
make musicals for television. Sometimes they nearly completely hit the
mark and one day they will Yeah. Yeah, I like
the idea of more live theater, having greater exposure, especially
(12:49):
in a world where one you can't really go see
live theater right now, not if you're being responsible and too.
Even when you can, it's not the most pessible art form,
especially if you're looking at stuff like Broadway. I mean,
that's that's that's for profit theater, and it is very
exclusive and very expensive. So having that increased accessibility I
(13:13):
think is great. And if it if it inspires more
people to get into theater, that's great. If it inspires
people to support theater, I love that as well. So
I'm fully on board with supporting it. I just don't
think i'll be watching it. Yeah. Yeah. So there are
a lot of a lot of Christmas movies that follow
into the general Christmas story genre, but I think that
(13:37):
we should focus on a couple of ones that are
much more geeky, because that's that's what we're about, right.
You didn't mean to go off on a whole diet
tribe about theater, although that's certainly geeky. So let's start
with the one that you alluded to early on, the
darkest one on our list, which is fat Man. Yea
fat man, No, not Batman. Fat Man starring Mel Gibson,
(13:58):
which already at for some people including me, starts to
raise red flags. But Mel Gibson is playing the role
of Santa, who is kind of down on his luck. Santa,
this is set in a very cynical world. Um And
in fact, that's something that that really stood out to
(14:18):
me is as I was reading the synopsis, that just
screamed cynicism to me, where Santa's disillusioned because more kids
are appearing on the Naughty List than the Nice List. Meanwhile,
Santa's income is dependent upon him delivering more presents to children,
like it's the number of presents he delivers relates back
(14:41):
to how much money he gets out of a budget
from the US government. And because there are fewer nice kids,
he's supplementing his income by essentially renting out the North
Pole and the elves to produce like military weapons and
vehicles and there's like you know, apparently some action hero
type stuff that happens. And it's just one of those
(15:03):
things where I told Ariel before we started recording that
you mentioned Scrooged at the beginning. It reminds me if
you if you watch Scrooged, there's that segment where there's
this fake action movie that they have a commercial for
called The Night the Reindeer Died, where Santa Claus and
um Uh the six Million Dollar Man are are fighting
(15:25):
off various ninja and terrorists at the North Pole, and
I'm like, oh my gosh, it sounds to me like
someone saw that and thought, let's make that for real,
but do it with without without humor. Yes, seriously, now
I do hear? You know, the reviews on this are
pretty mixed. Like you said, not happy holiday movies tend
(15:47):
to be a little bit more divisive. In The Assassin
that the child who receives coal, there's a rich child
who receives coal in this movie and hires a hit
man on Santa And apparently there's some high jinks in there.
Um played by played by Walter Goggins, And I like
Walter Goggins as an actor, but yeah, that's he's playing
(16:07):
a hit man coming after center and he apparently has
his own his own acts to grind with the Jolly Man. Yeah,
so so I guess if you don't, you know, I
I wasn't. This one's kind of flown under the radar
for me as a movie that's even happening. So if
that's your kind of jam, and you just have watched
(16:28):
so many Lifetime movies and Hallmark movies that you are
two hyped up on the cotton candy substance of those movies,
maybe this will bring you back down to earth. Um.
I mean, and to be clear, like I like some
dark holiday themed movies, there's some some Christmas themed horror
movies that I really like, uh, you know, including things
(16:50):
like cramp Us. We'll be talking later in this episode
about movies that are not really Christmas movies, but they
are set during the holiday season. But Grampus is one
that really is dependent upon Christmas. It's just it's a
Christmas themed horror movie that I think of kind of
similar in a way to another film we'll talk about later, Gremlins.
(17:12):
So there's you know, there are things out there that
I gravitate toward that are not your traditional holiday feel
good stuff. Uh. But yeah, I I feel like you.
I don't really I don't feel a strong pull to
this particular one. Have you seen or did you have? You?
Have you watched yet the Lego Star Wars Holiday Special?
(17:33):
I haven't. I have watched the original Star Wars Holiday
Special with um it looks like the old quiz No mascots,
where the novels were transposed on some poorly written cartoon characters,
except for in this case, it's actually just wookies. So
I've seen the original Star Wars Holiday Special. I first
(17:54):
of all, I'm sorry, so you got to see be
Arthur and and Harvey Corman and all the those people
doing weird Star Wars sketches and things. I like. I
like it for certain definitions of the word like, but
I have to be prepared for it, and I just
haven't been prepared for that. For the lego version. Well,
the lego version is not it's not a recreation of
(18:15):
the Star Wars Holiday Special. It is a news story.
It's a new story, and it it focuses on Ray,
not So which which clearly it had to be a
new story because Ray was not a character when the
original special two sisters Dough and Me. She does not.
And uh also the Holiday Special it does reference the
(18:36):
original special a little bit because Chewbacca does have a family,
so you get to see you know, Stinky and everybody
show up, but but they don't. Other than that, there's
no real nod to the original Holiday special. It's more
of a goofy comedy time travel story uh that has
(18:56):
a lot of funny little moments in it, So I
do recommend that one. I think that one if you
need your your holiday geek itch scratched. I think that
one does a decent job. I will definitely check it out.
Another movie I'm going to check out, and it's actually
I should have checked it out by now, it's already
on Netflix is Jingle Jangle. I am so looking forward
(19:19):
to seeing this too. I haven't made the time yet,
but it's on my must watch list, so I don't
let myself watch Christmas movies before Thanksgiving. So that's why
I haven't watched a lot of these Christmas movies at
the time. At the time we're recording this, but yes,
I want you. Jingle Jangle is a new Christmas musical
set in the Victorian era with a I'm not sure
(19:41):
if it's all black or predominantly black cat predominantly black.
It's about a young girl named Journey who is sent
to spend time with her curmudgeon le grandfather Um and
they create toys. And the thing I love about this
movie is that the gentleman who wrote it. David Talbert
had been wanting to do it for a stage play
and just couldn't quite make it work on stage and
(20:02):
couldn't quite get the right tone. And it took him
twenty years, and he had a kid, and then all
of a sudden he was able to collaborate with his
child on on this story. And then he went to
Netflix because he previously had done l Camino Christmas, which
is not a breaking bad movie, but it is a dark,
a dark Christmas comedy, um and uh, Netflix said, hey,
(20:26):
don't make this movie to budget, make the movie you
want and will fund it so to have. And he
wanted to make a movie that showed they're not a
lot of Christmas movies that uh feature black casts, and
he wanted to provide that representation and so on so
many multiple levels, from the representation in the cast and
(20:46):
in the costuming too. The fact that Netflix, who, as
we've talked about before, they make stuff for a wide
variety of people, and a lot of that is not
for me. Yeah, they found a lot of different productions,
some of which seem incredible just on the face of it,
some of which you're like, I did they just have
(21:07):
money left over in the budget that they absolutely had
to spend and that's why they funded this. But but
Jingle Jangle does look like like the preview I saw
was so captivating, and the costumes look so amazing, the
special effects like the whole plot behind it involves a
former apprentice of the grandfather who has stolen the grandfather's
(21:31):
designs and become wealthy using those designs while the grandfather
is kind of toiled in in uh in in poverty.
Really and um Keegan Michael Key plays the former apprentice, Gustafsson,
and he has a costume that makes him look I
don't know if they were specifically going for this, but
(21:51):
to me, he looks like like the Wizard of Oz,
Like he looks like he could have come out of
the Emerald City. And I wonder if that was a
a purposeful choice, but it was just the first thing
I thought. Maybe it's just because his jacket is like
Emerald green, but yeah, it's it's all the classic setup
(22:13):
of your your classic Christmas tale of you know, an
old disillusioned person rediscovering joy through the association with youth
and overcoming great odds. And it's a musical and the
dancing looks amazing and yeah, just it's that kind of
thing that is hitting all the right switches for me
(22:36):
for a feel good Christmas movie. Yeah. Another another one
that I think flew under the radar for me but
is hitting all the right switches is Dear Santa. There
was a two thousand and eleven movie. Is this about
Santa Claus? Who has Is this about Santa Claus? Who
has antlers? And it's not it's not so it's not
d e E R Santa. It's d e A R Santa.
(22:59):
Although I would watch, I would watch d e E
there might be one too many, ease, and there are
Santa as well. Dear Santa. Um. Now this one is about, uh,
this is a documentary about the Operation Santa program the
United States Postal Service does with all of the letters
they get from children who who write to Santa Claus.
(23:21):
And it's it's a little bit more real life, uplifting
and I very much look forward to watching it. Yeah,
it's good to remind ourselves occasionally about the capacity we
have to do nice things, because we often can forget
about that with the the deluge of stressful, negative news
(23:43):
that surrounds us all the time. Well, we have a
full discussion to have coming up about movies that may
or may not be Christmas movies, depending upon as Obi
one Kennoby would say a certain point of view. But
we will it to that after we take this quick break.
(24:13):
So we didn't even really get to talk about all
the movies we wanted to. But that's okay because we're
going to go from the new to old. Like Jonathan said, so, um,
these movies are a few of my favorite things. You
went right for the reference of the one that drives
me nuts the most and it's not even a movie. Well,
(24:35):
I guess the movie is also considered a Christmas movie. Yes,
some people do consider us. So we're talking about the
sound of music, which uh, so arial when you think
of that, do you think of just the musical or
do you think of specifically the song? Uh my favorite things?
So uh, I think when I think of sound of music,
I think of the musical, and I specifically think of
(24:55):
the movie musical. Uh And I go, well, maybe that's
kind of Christmas Eve, but a few these are a
few of my favorite things. Does play at the holiday
season all the time, and so to me, yeah, it's
it's about gifts. It's just a Christmas song. So even
though it's not that one, that one drives me nuts
that it comes on. Like when I listen to a
holiday music station and that song comes on, I get
(25:15):
irrationally angry because I think that is not a Christmas song.
It mentions Christmas in passing in the song. It mentioned
snow in passing in the song, but it is. There's
literally singing about a few of their favorite things. It
could be in the middle of July, it's still still
(25:35):
one of your favorite things. Don't play that on my
holiday station. I feel very strongly about this. Well, I
guess it's got snowflakes on nose and eyelashes, which you're
not normally gonna get. But any they're just they're just yeah,
they're just telling about a few of their favorite things,
which may only happen once in your lifetime. I mean,
(25:56):
kittens usually have what happened what in the spring and summer? Yeah,
you don't get a lot. Well, it's not really up
to us, but typically we see that more in the spring. Okay,
So there are some other movies and there I know
that you feel very passionate about them that people think
are Christmas movies. Um, the I think the most divisive
(26:18):
one that I have ever talked with you about, Jonathan
is die Hard. Yeah. Yeah, there's some people are like
die Hard It's my favorite Christmas movie and I will
die on this hill Hard. It is not a Christmas movie.
It is a movie set during Christmas. It is not
a Christmas movie. Is there a Christmas tree in it? Yes,
(26:39):
there's a Christmas party. No, it is not. It is
not a Christmas movie. It is not. Diehard is an actor.
First of all, Diehard is is the perfect action film,
and that is both a positive and a negative. It's
a negative because die Hard created a new paradigm for
action movies, right. Die Hard started a new trend that
(27:02):
everyone was trying to copy, which is why for many
years in the nineties and even into the early two thousand's,
people would describe action movies as it's die Hard on
a something something so like Speed was die Hard on
a bus and then later die Hard on a boat
because they speed to Um yeah yeah, so so both
(27:25):
good and bad. But die Heart is a phenomenal film
all in its own. It just isn't a Christmas movie.
It does have some Christmas music in it, but it's
not a Christmas movie. See, I might wager a different
opinion because if if everyone had not been at the
(27:47):
at the Nakami Plaza for the Christmas party, there would
not have been nearly as many casualties. So Christmas in
a way fuels everything that happens in that movie. But
it could to me, even though it's and focus on
the Christmas spirit, it is a Christmas movie because without
the Christmas party, nobody would have been there too. It
(28:07):
would have just been a basic corporate robbery. It could
have also been a New Year's Eve party. There was
no reason it had to be a Christmas party. It
could literally have been a party for any reason. It
could have been this is the anniversary of the founding
of the company, and you would still have that same
reason why people get together now. Granted, Christmas party is
the kind of party where you typically have not just
(28:27):
the employees, but often their families there too. Thankfully, I
don't think we see any kids in Die Hard, which
is a good thing considering one the people at the
party are behaving in a way that is not appropriate
for children, and too when when when stuff goes down,
you don't want kids there. But but you see, you
(28:49):
said it could be any time. It wasn't the writer Christmas.
But but again, but again, if you had said that,
there's if you had said it at any other time
of the year or the rest of the story would
still play out as it does. It is not dependent
upon Christmas, so it is not a Christmas movie. It's
not dependent on Christmas. But it does take place at Christmas,
(29:10):
So I think it's a Christmas movie. I think we
might disagree with this. Maybe I'll concede that it is
a winter holiday movie. No, it's an action film, and
that's it. It's an action movie. It's a great action movie.
It's my favorite action movie, to the point where it
actually kind of ruined action movies for me for a
really long time. But it's not Let's move on to
(29:32):
a different movie. Okay, sure, okay, So what do you
think about grim Lets the Christmas movie? No, not a
Christmas It's said it Christmas, and technically, Gizmo the Magua
is is a Christmas present, but it again, the story
does not revolve. There's some cool Christmas Ee stuff in it, like,
there's some cool uses of Christmas in it, But unlike Crampus,
(29:56):
for example, it is not it's not revolving around Christmas.
I also Crampus argument well, because because I think Gremlins
and Crampus are like they're like they're like sister movies there.
They both have a similar tone. They both have a
kind of mean spirited edge to the malicious nous in them.
(30:21):
They both aren't so intense that, you know, like a
younger viewer, someone who's maybe ten to twelve years old,
could probably watch either of those and it would be
it would be a lot, but they could probably handle it.
I mean, I saw Gremlins when I was a kid,
and I turned out mostly okay. But I think Crampus
is around the same way. I didn't watch it until
(30:44):
I was a little bit older. I've never watched Crampus.
I think it would be too scary for me. I
think Gremlins is much more a Christmas movie than die Hard,
and I love die Harden. I like saying Diehard Christmas movie,
not just to annoy you, Jonathan, but primarily to annoy me. Yeah,
but I I I would say on Gremlins is a
Christmas movie because if the entire story focuses around a
(31:05):
Christmas present, I guess I guess I could be more
convinced about Gremlins than die Hard. Um. And the one
reason why I really could go with it is one
of the worst parts of the Gremlins film, but one
of the best parts of Gremlins too, which is when
Phoebe Kates tells the story about why she hates Christmas,
(31:27):
which is the most over the top awful story to
ever have happened to anyone ever really in a in
a Christmas movie. And then in Christmas Too, she they
satirize that with her talking about uh President's Day. I think, yeah, yeah,
her character. I have based RPG characters, Monster of the
Week characters off of her. Um. Okay, what about Shazam
(31:51):
not a Christimer, not a Christian Christmas though I would
agree that that one. I'd agree it's not a Christmas
movie to me either. Winter movie. Yes, Um, I know
that the director really liked Christmas, but um, the holidays,
which is why he said it at that time. But yeah,
to me, it's not a It's not Christmas. Yeah. I
(32:12):
saw that one pretty late, like it had already left
theaters and I caught it on I think I caught
it on a plane actually, And um, I was I
had heard it was entertaining, but my expectations were fairly low,
simply because I had been let down so frequently by
DC superhero movies. Uh, they just weren't for me. I'm
(32:34):
not saying that they were bad movies. I'm just saying
they didn't appeal to me. I didn't like them, with
the exception of Wonder Woman and um this one, I
really liked it was I thought it was really entertaining.
But even as I was watching it, like when you
said when you put it on this list, I didn't
even remember that there was anything about Christmas in that
film at all. Like that, that doesn't even I don't
(32:57):
associate the movie with Christmas, because that's not what I
think of when I think. No grant, I've only seen
the movie one time, but it's not what I think
of when I think of the film, which again, is entertaining.
I recommend it for people who haven't seen it. I
did watch it for the first time last Christmas season. Um, Ariel, Ariel,
you can't. You can't count something a Christmas movie just
(33:19):
because you happen to watch it around Christmas. Well, if
that were the only reason I was counting it as
a Christmas movie. I wouldn't. Okay, here's here's one that
a lot of people disagree on. What do you think
about Love actually, not as a movie, about whether it's
a Christmas movie? Uh, I have never seen Love Actually,
I have never seen I've seen the clips, Like, is
(33:40):
that the one that has the bit where the guy
is at the door and he has the poster board
cards with the words written on it, and he's essentially saying, Hey,
you know, I totally dig you, but you're married, but
I still dig you. So I'm going to totally leverage
this awkward moment and ignore the fact that you are
actually in a committed relationship. So you need to like
(34:03):
totally mac on me because I'm I'm really a cool,
handsome dude. I hate that, Like, I don't have any
context for that scene, but it makes me so mad.
It's um that movie. I enjoyed the movie. It just
it's an anthology of relationships. So I like certain bits
of that movie better than others. Next, Batman Returns not
(34:26):
a Christmas movie. Said at Christmas, I love Batman Returns.
I love it. It's it's got its faults. I don't
think that the version of the Penguin is one that
I particularly agree with. But I think Danny Defito was
great in the movie, so I think I think it
did a great job. I just didn't like that version
(34:47):
of the penguin. Um. But penguins are all about Christmas, No,
they're not. You know that. You know that when Christmas
is over, penguin still exists, right, they don't. They don't
just poff out of existence. Yes, year round. Yeah, I know.
It's it's a shock to the system. Uh. Batman Returns
is not a Christmas movie. Uh. It does, however, have
(35:09):
an amazing performance by Christopher Walking in it. I. Um,
I will agree with you on that one. I love
that Man Returns. Um, I just want, I just wanted.
I like my penguin argument. I know it doesn't hold water.
Uh much like a penguin's wings don't fly. Um. Okay.
Edwards scissor Hands also so Edward scissor Hands I think
(35:29):
of as more of a fairy tale that happens to
be said at Christmas. But it's it's it's this one's
borderline for me because it has some of the magic
that you associate with Christmas stories, right, Like there is
a magical element to Edward scissor Hands, and it really
is got that fairy tale field to it. It's one
(35:50):
of the you know, Tim Burton stuff in general tends
towards the fantastical. Um even his more realistic films still
have elements of that in it, and Edward scissor Hands
is pretty far into the fantastical. So I think of
it more as a fairy tale that that is set
in the winter. But I don't think of it as
a Christmas movie. This one kind of ends at Christmas
(36:12):
with the snow and it's snowing again. And to me,
because it has that final note of you know, now
it snows on Christmas, to me, that makes that that
one note makes the entire thing a Christmas movie. I
don't know a related note, then, what do you think
about The Nightmare Before Christmas? Is that a Christmas movie?
I have never seen that. You've never seen The Nightmare
(36:32):
Before Christmas? You've got to see that. I think you
would really dig it. It's it's a very sweet movie.
I don't think of it as a Christmas movie. Um.
I think of it as a Honestly, I think of
it as a Thanksgiving movie because it's because it's because
the action takes place between Halloween and Christmas. Now, granted
(36:53):
it does end that spoiler alert, it does end at Christmas,
but I don't. I think of it as sort of
that bridging season between Halloween and Christmas. That's where that
movie really lives. So I think the thing is that
I don't like mixing my Hollywoodeen with Christmas. They're two
completely different, like emotional genres for me in real life,
(37:14):
and so it's just never appealed to me to watch
it in movie form. That being said, plenty of people
have told me I should watch it, including like you
and my husband. Uh, just like plenty of people have
told me I should watch Up. Um, I just haven't.
I will probably watch Nightmare before Christmas before I watch UP. Well.
Up is great. The first ten minutes will destroy you. Okay,
(37:36):
Coming to America is Coming to America Christmas story. There's
a dude in a whole lot of Santa suit. It
is not. It is not. Listen, the the bath scene
alone tells me it cannot be a Christmas movie. There
is a line in that scene that will never belong
to a Christmas movie. So no, it is not. Okay,
(38:01):
I I don't really think that was a Christmas movie either.
I want to argue you for comedy's sake, but we're
already running along. So I've got one more Annie. I
don't think of any as a Christmas movie either. Like
it's It's interesting because when I looked at this list,
some of them I do remember being set around Christmas,
and others I think, and I'm like, I don't know,
(38:23):
I don't have any I have no memory of that
taking place around Christmas. Now. It has been a very
long time since I've seen Annie, uh, And I don't
associate with Christmas at all, because Annie is really getting
pretty much like all the comforts that she could want
because she's been adopted by a billionaire. Um so, so
(38:46):
in that case, it's like Christmas almost seems like it's
a overkill because she's already getting everything. But but I
just don't remember it having anything to do with Christmas.
In the stage musical, it's Chris Miss when uh, when
Miss Hannigan and Ruster Lilier caught at the Warbucks mansion.
So gotcha, I you know, I guess I can see
(39:09):
what you're saying there. So really, really where it falls
the line to me is if Christmas drives the plot.
Even if it's not focused on the ideals of Christmas,
it can count as a Christmas movie. To Jonathan, it
seems like if it doesn't uphold the ideals of Christmas
as a part of the movie, then it's not a
(39:29):
Christmas movie. Yeah. No, if it's if it just happens
to be set around Christmas time, that's not enough. You've
got our try harder. Uh Like, it could still be
a great movie, it's just not a Christmas movie. Might
be a movie that you watch around Christmas doesn't make
it a Christmas movie. Well what if we mashed up
a Christmas movie with a not Christmas movie? Would that
(39:50):
make it three quarters Christmas and enough to count for you?
I guess we will find out after this short break,
(40:13):
all right, Ariel, tell everybody what two movies you decided
to mash up together? Because you picked these? I picked these,
which I dug a real hole for myself, you guys,
it was. It was a challenge, but when I gladly accepted.
Originally it was going to be home Alone in Annie
because I liked the dichotomy of uh, someone defending their house,
(40:33):
whereasus someone who was an orphan Um. But then Jonathan
actually pointed out that we've had so many musical mashups recently,
so I changed it. So I really was just begging
you to spare our audience from me singing again. Fair enough,
So we're doing Home Alone, which I will fight tooth
and nail. Is a Christmas movie. Um, and I don't
(40:55):
think Jonathan would disagree on this. No, us not, I don't.
I mean it takes it takes place at Christmas. He's
left at home because his family leaves for Christmas. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yeah,
I know. I know. He talks to Santa, he asked
Santa for his family. It is a Christmas movie. And
Die Hard, which is not a Christmas movie, as we
(41:17):
have already established Christmas music. Uh, do you want to
go first? Ye? You want me to go first? Um,
I'll go ahead and go first. Okay, go first. I now,
we have not shared these with each other, and we
don't know how similar they're going to be. Probably fairly similar.
(41:40):
But I want to hear your pitch. Okay. So this
is Home Hard Lost naka Tomi Plaza. I love it
already because if you if you putting like die Home,
Die Alone is so grim. Yeah, there there die like
(42:00):
it is just there weren't any good combinations. So Homehard lost,
Nackatomi Plasa. So it's Christmas Eve and Kevin McClean aster's
mom because Kevin McAllister is a character and home Alone,
we didn't really deep dive into it. But I want
to get right to the meat. So Kevin mccleanister's mom,
refusing to leave him at home alone, has stuck him
(42:20):
in the worst imaginable place, the kids play area at
Nakatomi Plaza, while she and her new husband Kevin stepdad
Argyle attend her company Christmas party. Our gyle is the
driver in Die Hard, Okay, so just so people can
realize my brilliance, okay. Staring wistfully out the will window
(42:40):
of the kids play area, bemoaning the fact that he
is a mature nine year old stuck in a room
with a bunch of children, Kevin notices a suspicious yet
all too too familiar van pull up to the office building.
On the side of the van, it says Sticky Groober's
uh key bandits were the second iteration of the wet
(43:03):
bandits from Home Alone one and two, so they must
have up to their game. After having been foiled by
a latch key kid twice already um and moved to
corporate crime, Kevin also realizes that if these sticky groupers
ruined his mother's Christmas party, he will be blamed for it. Uh.
You know it's kid logic, go with it, So he
(43:25):
decides to stop them. He's done it twice before, it
shouldn't be any different now. He scours the playroom looking
for anything he can use to his advantage, but all
he finds is a set of legos, a tarantula and
a terrarium, and an empty nerf gun and a bag
of marbles. I guess it's not only that's a that's
a good arsenal for this kid. Uh. He just succeeds
at gathering all these items up when the Sticky Groupers
(43:46):
shoot the window and enter the building, causing enough of
a distraction for Kevin to crawl into the duck system
and out of the blay room. He exits the duck
system at the top of the elevator. I don't know
how duck systems work, but I'm assuming this is aunt.
So he lands like on top of the elevator. In
the elevator shaft. Just as the Sticky Groupers enter, he
drops the direct tarantula through the little latch door at
(44:09):
the top, causing them to hit half the buttons on
the elevator. But he realizes all too quickly that they're
gonna get really sick of stopping on every floor, so
he also jams a bunch of legos into the into
the elevator, works to stop it and get it stuck. Uh.
This leaves him just enough time to load load the
marbles into his NERF gun, aim at the groupers through
the window and take through the little door at the
top of the elevator. Elevator thank you, and take him out.
(44:34):
Just then the legos break, the elevator goes up to
the next floor, the doors open, Kevin gets thrown on
top of the Sticky Groupers, who are now passed out
from being shot in the head with marbles from a
NERF gun, and it opens on the Christmas party. When
Kevin mccleanister's mom sees him, mccleanister's mom sees him, she
blames him for escaping the play paid place, completely overlooking
(44:54):
the fact that he foiled a dangerous corporate robbery, but
because it's Christmas. She's so happy to see him, she
doesn't ground him, and they go home and they live
happily ever after. Okay, so I can tell you pot halfway.
I can tell you that we totally did not go
the same way. So you are you ready for my attempt?
That was a masterpiece? Areal? That was a masterpiece. So
(45:18):
thank you? I am so ready. Yours are always fantastic.
Here we go. Kevin McAllister is returning home after being
away all year, having recently graduated the police academy. He
gets to the family home and discovers, to his shock
that his family isn't there. They've left on a Christmas trip,
completely forgetting that Kevin was on his way back home
(45:38):
to visit them. How can the same thing happen to
the same guy, like eight times, Kevin says. Kevin lets
himself into the family home, having traveled all that way,
and does his best to make merry. He watches old
action movies, dances around, and generally tries to have a
good time. We can see, though, that he is not
having a good time. We see this with occasional glimpses
(46:01):
of his face, which is sad, and the fact that
he's making fists with his toes on the carpet, a
sure sign that he's experiencing anxiety. Late in the night,
a pair of apparent robbers or bandits if you prefer,
break into the house just as Kevin is in the
kitchen making some snacks. Kevin here's them, so he's able
to be quiet and evade notice. But his service revolver
(46:24):
is in his spare room where he had planned to sleep.
He conceals himself and listens in, and soon it becomes
a parent. The bandits are more than just your average
house thieves. For one thing. They are soon joined by
another thief, and another and another, like twenty guys show up.
They're all vaguely European except for one guy who is
(46:45):
clearly American, and he's a hacker because he wears glasses.
These bandits have heard that Kevin's dad has a huge
number of bonds hidden in a safe, which is in
itself in a hidden part of the house and will
require an enormous amount of time to break into, and
so they get to work and before long they're using
various tools to try and break through the safe. Kevin meanwhile,
(47:08):
sneaks around the house quietly setting up various booby traps.
He's without his gun after one thief while just doing
a cursory search, happens across the revolver using tools like
gardening implements, paint cans, ball bearings, crazy glue, hungry Hungry
Hippo's board game, and some steak knives. Kevin McAllister takes
(47:30):
out the bandits one by one, or sometimes one by two,
because you know, he's kind of a badass. At the
end of the movie, it's down to Kevin and the
last two bandits, which are revealed to be his old nemesses,
the Wet Bandits themselves, who are just desperately clinging to
the idea of one last big heist so they can retire.
(47:52):
So Kevin totally shoots them a whole bunch with his revolver,
which I forgot to mention he managed to retrieve I
don't know, like maybe three bandits ago. At the very
end of the film, the phone rings and as Kevin
stands in what is essentially a pile of corpses, he
has a conversation on the phone that sounds like he's
talking with his family. But then at the very end
he says merry Christmas. Mr McClean boom. Kevin mccallister's teacher
(48:16):
at the Police Academy was John McLean. Bet you didn't
see that coming the end. Oh I love it. I
love the twist. Oh my goodness, I thought you were
going to swear for a second. It was a real
roller custy. Yeah. No, there was no yippy kaya ying
in that hot like please me, Mr Falcon, not not
the the But was I loved it? Yeah? Yeah, see
(48:40):
I was. I was trying to think of, like, it's
cool because you actually went to the die hard setting
whereas I went to the home alone setting, and as
I said, like, we did not talk about this beforehand,
so we had no idea what the other person was
going to do before they did it. So that was
kind of that was that was a fun experiment, and
it was just lucky that we both went the opposite way.
(49:02):
You know, I'm sure there are other ways to go
with it too. It's not one or the other. In fact,
if if our listeners come up with ways that they
would like to combine these two classics, one a Christmas
classic and one totally not a Christmas classic, then they
should do that and let us know about them. Yes,
you can reach out to us on social media on
(49:25):
Twitter where at l n C Underscore Podcast, and we're
also on the facebooks and the instagrams. You can post
a message or you can send us a d M.
If we like your ideas and your mashups, will read
them on an episode. And you can also tell Jonathan
that die Hard is totally a Christmas movie. Actually I
won't listen, he won't listen, let him have this this
(49:48):
this holiday, but I'll listen, so you can tell me,
um whatever you think either way, Well that I think
that wraps this one up. I think it's time for
us to wrapped this episode up and then maybe unwrapped
some presents. I agree. So until next time, I'm Ariel
cast In and I'm Jingland Strickland. Happy Holidays. M m
(50:28):
m m M. The Large Nur John Collider is a
production of I Heart Radio and was created by Ariel
cast In. Jonathan Strickland is the executive producer. This show
is produced, edited and published by Tory Harrison. For more
podcast on my heart Radio, visit the I heart Radio app,
(50:49):
Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.
The Large Nerdron Collider Podcast is a production of I
Heart Radio. Hey everybody, welcome to The Large Nerdron Collider Podcast,
the podcast that's all about the geeky stuff happening in
the world around us and how excited we are about it.
(00:29):
I am Ariel casting and with me as always is
my co host, Holly Jolly Jonathan Strickland. Yep, Um, got
a belly leca a bowl full of jelly. That's what
That's what lockdown does to me. Hey, Harriel, I got
a question for you. So here's your question. To start
(00:53):
off this episode. Let us say that, for some cruel
twist of fate, you are limited to only being able
to watch one holiday special or film each year. What
would you have picked for this year? Oh golly, oh
that's such a hard one, Jonathan, I know, way to go. Um. Now,
(01:19):
keep in mind next year you would be able to
choose a different one, but you can only have one
this year. I'm gonna say Scrooged, Scrooged, the Bill Murray Classic. Okay,
that's a that's a decent answer. That's a decent answer.
(01:39):
It's one that that's actually very divisive to I know
people who have very strong feelings about that one, because
it is they feel a bit too mean spirited. But
I think the anarchic nature of that plus the really
weird meta fourth wall breaking ending is kind of interesting.
(01:59):
Yeah yeah, I mean, just to keep it fresh. Like,
that's one that I haven't watched that much recently because
like you said, it's it's a little bit divisive, So
I've watched a lot more, you know, Charlie Brown Christmas
and things like that. So just it's a clean change
of pace for a year. Got it? What holiday movie
(02:21):
would you watch for this year as your only holiday movie? Ariel,
I'm so glad you asked me that question. I really
I've been agonizing over this since I asked you about
three minutes ago. I would pick immittt Otters jug Band Christmas,
but it would absolutely have to be the version that
originally aired on HBO back in the eighties that has
(02:44):
all the stuff in it, including all the interstitial moments
with Kermit the Frog, because if you've only seen him
at Hotter Post the HBO special, then you may not
even know that Kermit was in it. Because that to
the Henson Company split off, like the the Immitt Auto
property split away. From the Muppet part, and then you
(03:06):
had this complicated rights issue. And unfortunately it also meant
that typically the version of emmett Utter that you can
find these days, whether it's on DVD or streaming or whatever,
cuts out some of the jokes, and I don't understand why. Like,
there's typically one song that gets cut at least, and
there's one there's one joke that literally without the joke,
(03:31):
the scene doesn't make sense. No, I'm aware of this.
I can't remember the joke, but I remember thinking that
was incongruous. And then we've had this conversation before. Because
I feel like you would pick emmett Utter every year
for your soul holiday movie, and probably for your only
movie for the entire year. I might occasionally swap it
(03:53):
out for the Scrooge the musical with the thank you
very much, Thank you very much that's song. I love
that song, and I love that version of Christmas Carol.
There are lots of different great versions. Yeah, that musical
one is a lot of fun, I mean hot take,
And people who know me know that I have this opinion.
I am not a fan of the Muppet Christmas Carol,
(04:16):
even though I love the Muppets me neither neither. I'm
more of a traditionalist m it well, and I mean
I don't I don't even mind like the jokes and stuff,
and I do appreciate the fact that they they incorporate
Charles Dickens into that version of Christmas Caroll, so you
get to hear more lines that you normally wouldn't hear
(04:39):
because no one would. It's it's descriptions that no one
would ever speak in dialogue, right. That is cool. However,
I just feel like the Muppets aren't muppety enough in that, like,
like they don't go far enough in the Muppets thing
for it to feel like a real Muppet movie, not
like Muppet Treasure Island, I feel is way more more
liberal of the Muppets. But my favorite Muppet movie is
(05:03):
Muppet Treasure Island. And see that's the thing the same
same here, I really, I mean, my favorite is still
the original Muppet movie, but Muppet Treasure Island I feel
they got it right right that I feel like they
didn't go hard enough with Christmas Carroll. Also, I mean,
I know people who absolutely love his performance, but Mike
Cocaine was not my favorite Scrooge by a long shot.
(05:25):
I don't like picking favorite Scrooges. Um, it's like picking
a favorite child. I think there are plenty of old
men who are very curmudgeed le and play the role
quite well, and a few women too. There have been
a few versions of Christmas Carol with a female Scrooge,
and those are Yeah. And also there are plenty of
curmudging lee older people who play Scrooge very well. And
(05:49):
you've you've been in productions of Christmas Carroll, so you
also have that that perspective. Yeah, I've played uh, Mrs Fezziwig,
I've played Mrs Cratchett, I've played to Go to Christmas Future,
I've played the Charwoman. Yeah, Concertina street caroller. So you've
got you've got you've got practice of of ominously pointing
(06:11):
in the distance downpat Yeah, so I'm a little bit Well.
They weren't real stilts. They were like plywood stilts that
then got caught under the like the long black robe.
It was a wonderful experience. I never fell over personally. Um,
this is also crazy, guys, because most of you probably
(06:33):
don't know this, but Ariel is approximately seven ft tall already,
so I'm only five. Um, but so I'm a little biased.
But you know, you ask what movie I'd watch every year,
I feel like it's kind of an unfair question because
we've gotten a whole lot of new holiday movies this year,
and not just the Hallmark Lifetime Slew that we normally get. No,
(06:57):
but the Hallmark Lifetime Slew does account for a out
of all holiday movies every year, but that's just by volume. Yeah,
but I mean sometimes if you want something uplifting, you
just want some uplifting background, that's great because you're guaranteed
to get that with a Hallmarker Lifetime movie. That's true.
I mean, like there might not be a whole lot
(07:17):
of of meat on the bone there, but you can
be pretty certain you know what the emotional beats of
those films are gonna be. They're kind of like the
holiday equivalent to romance novels, where they all follow a
pretty similar pattern and you know how they're going to
turn out. Now. Granted, some of the holiday movies that
are also uh popular on streaming this year, because that's
(07:41):
that's how that's how we're all enjoying these days. Um,
some of them, some of them go a little dark.
There are a couple that are are either emotionally really
going to to tear at you, or in one case,
you've got a Santa Claus who's it was. It was
an action movie star kicking butt, which you know, a
(08:04):
lot of years I might go for this year, I know,
I said Scrooge, I'm kind of feeling uplifting. I'm willing
to let one of these new movies kind of take
Scrooges place, yeah, to kind of kind of sum things.
I think soothing is something that we could all use.
This year. It's been a it's been a I don't
know if you guys out there have noticed, it's been
a weird year, y'all. M it really has. So we
(08:28):
are we are recording this a little bit before it
airs because we want to spend time with our families
for Christmas as well, you know, whatever form that takes.
But um, we we wanted to talk about some of
the holiday movies coming out. UM one of which is
actually a TV special event it will have aired by
(08:51):
the time that this episode airs, which is The Grinch
Musical event with Matthew Morrison as the Grinch. They showed
a commercial for it if you watch the Macy's Day
Parade this year on television, they showed a commercial for it.
It got some mixed reviews, and you know, I'm I'm
(09:11):
a little mixed on my opinion about it as well.
I haven't seen it yet. Might might have by the
time you listen to this, but um, I don't know.
I love the Grunch and I think that the actions
and I think that the music translates very well to stage.
But any time I've seen an exception of one person
(09:32):
who plays the Granch amazingly, which is a mutual acquaintance
of Jonathan and I Judah, he plays an amazing Granch.
But otherwise, anytime I see a live action version of
the Granch, it feels fake to me. Yeah, well it's
a person in a large, green, fuzzy muppet suit. Yeah,
I I'm I don't have any desire to see live
(09:57):
action versions of the Grunch. I'm fine with the rich cartoon. Um.
I think it's I think it's a classic. I'm not
saying that no one should ever adapt it for other forms.
I don't believe that. It's just I don't have any
interest in it. It doesn't like when Jim Carey's films
came out. I didn't really have any interest in seeing
(10:17):
that when the musical first a stage, even with people
like Patrick Page, who is a phenomenal actor. Um, he
plays Hades in Hades Town. He was the Grinch. Like
I watched. Yeah, I watched a clip from the Macy's
Parade from two thousand fifteen, and they did the who
(10:41):
Celebrates Christmas or who Loves Christmas song and it's the
Who's by the way in case you were wondering, um,
And and at the end of it they also did
a little bit of your I mean one Mr Grench
and Patrick Page was playing the Grinch. That version of
the makeup and costume I thought looked pretty terrible. Uh.
But then again, also the video I was watching was
(11:03):
really bad quality. It was on YouTube. It was some
someone who just captured it off their TV or whatever. Um,
it was not great. And uh, I was just blown
away that Patrick Page had played that part because I
that somehow escaped my attention when it was happening. Um.
But yeah, I have nothing against Matthew Morrison. I think
he's a very good performer, and I don't have anything
(11:25):
against um, the other folks who were in it. I mean,
I don't know if you know this areal. One of
the other cast members of this production is Dennis O'Hare,
who was one of two actors playing the dog and
Dennis No. The other actor is also a human being.
(11:46):
Uh Dennis so here for those who don't know well.
First of all, he was in American Horror Story the
first season as a supporting character. But I think of
him as Charles J. Guteaux from Assassin's the same production
that Neil Patrick Harris was in, and he did a
great job in that. I look at him and I
(12:06):
go he would play a good Grunch For as as
much as I like a stage of the I will
admit that I did not see the Macy Stay Parade
version of the Grunch musical. I've only seen the granch
on stage in adaptations of suskal Um. But I think
it's just some uncanny Valley costume stuff for me. Maybe
maybe it's just never been the right costume design. I agree.
(12:29):
I will probably watch it. I'm just gonna say I
will probably watch it because I like encouraging them to
make musicals for television. Sometimes they nearly completely hit the
mark and one day they will Yeah. Yeah, I like
the idea of more live theater, having greater exposure, especially
(12:49):
in a world where one you can't really go see
live theater right now, not if you're being responsible and too.
Even when you can, it's not the most pessible art form,
especially if you're looking at stuff like Broadway. I mean,
that's that's that's for profit theater, and it is very
exclusive and very expensive. So having that increased accessibility I
(13:13):
think is great. And if it if it inspires more
people to get into theater, that's great. If it inspires
people to support theater, I love that as well. So
I'm fully on board with supporting it. I just don't
think i'll be watching it. Yeah. Yeah. So there are
a lot of a lot of Christmas movies that follow
into the general Christmas story genre, but I think that
(13:37):
we should focus on a couple of ones that are
much more geeky, because that's that's what we're about, right.
You didn't mean to go off on a whole diet
tribe about theater, although that's certainly geeky. So let's start
with the one that you alluded to early on, the
darkest one on our list, which is fat Man. Yea
fat man, No, not Batman. Fat Man starring Mel Gibson,
(13:58):
which already at for some people including me, starts to
raise red flags. But Mel Gibson is playing the role
of Santa, who is kind of down on his luck. Santa,
this is set in a very cynical world. Um And
in fact, that's something that that really stood out to
(14:18):
me is as I was reading the synopsis, that just
screamed cynicism to me, where Santa's disillusioned because more kids
are appearing on the Naughty List than the Nice List. Meanwhile,
Santa's income is dependent upon him delivering more presents to children,
like it's the number of presents he delivers relates back
(14:41):
to how much money he gets out of a budget
from the US government. And because there are fewer nice kids,
he's supplementing his income by essentially renting out the North
Pole and the elves to produce like military weapons and
vehicles and there's like you know, apparently some action hero
type stuff that happens. And it's just one of those
(15:03):
things where I told Ariel before we started recording that
you mentioned Scrooged at the beginning. It reminds me if
you if you watch Scrooged, there's that segment where there's
this fake action movie that they have a commercial for
called The Night the Reindeer Died, where Santa Claus and
um Uh the six Million Dollar Man are are fighting
(15:25):
off various ninja and terrorists at the North Pole, and
I'm like, oh my gosh, it sounds to me like
someone saw that and thought, let's make that for real,
but do it with without without humor. Yes, seriously, now
I do hear? You know, the reviews on this are
pretty mixed. Like you said, not happy holiday movies tend
(15:47):
to be a little bit more divisive. In The Assassin
that the child who receives coal, there's a rich child
who receives coal in this movie and hires a hit
man on Santa And apparently there's some high jinks in there.
Um played by played by Walter Goggins, And I like
Walter Goggins as an actor, but yeah, that's he's playing
(16:07):
a hit man coming after center and he apparently has
his own his own acts to grind with the Jolly Man. Yeah,
so so I guess if you don't, you know, I
I wasn't. This one's kind of flown under the radar
for me as a movie that's even happening. So if
that's your kind of jam, and you just have watched
(16:28):
so many Lifetime movies and Hallmark movies that you are
two hyped up on the cotton candy substance of those movies,
maybe this will bring you back down to earth. Um.
I mean, and to be clear, like I like some
dark holiday themed movies, there's some some Christmas themed horror
movies that I really like, uh, you know, including things
(16:50):
like cramp Us. We'll be talking later in this episode
about movies that are not really Christmas movies, but they
are set during the holiday season. But Grampus is one
that really is dependent upon Christmas. It's just it's a
Christmas themed horror movie that I think of kind of
similar in a way to another film we'll talk about later, Gremlins.
(17:12):
So there's you know, there are things out there that
I gravitate toward that are not your traditional holiday feel
good stuff. Uh. But yeah, I I feel like you.
I don't really I don't feel a strong pull to
this particular one. Have you seen or did you have? You?
Have you watched yet the Lego Star Wars Holiday Special?
(17:33):
I haven't. I have watched the original Star Wars Holiday
Special with um it looks like the old quiz No mascots,
where the novels were transposed on some poorly written cartoon characters,
except for in this case, it's actually just wookies. So
I've seen the original Star Wars Holiday Special. I first
(17:54):
of all, I'm sorry, so you got to see be
Arthur and and Harvey Corman and all the those people
doing weird Star Wars sketches and things. I like. I
like it for certain definitions of the word like, but
I have to be prepared for it, and I just
haven't been prepared for that. For the lego version. Well,
the lego version is not it's not a recreation of
(18:15):
the Star Wars Holiday Special. It is a news story.
It's a new story, and it it focuses on Ray,
not So which which clearly it had to be a
new story because Ray was not a character when the
original special two sisters Dough and Me. She does not.
And uh also the Holiday Special it does reference the
(18:36):
original special a little bit because Chewbacca does have a family,
so you get to see you know, Stinky and everybody
show up, but but they don't. Other than that, there's
no real nod to the original Holiday special. It's more
of a goofy comedy time travel story uh that has
(18:56):
a lot of funny little moments in it, So I
do recommend that one. I think that one if you
need your your holiday geek itch scratched. I think that
one does a decent job. I will definitely check it out.
Another movie I'm going to check out, and it's actually
I should have checked it out by now, it's already
on Netflix is Jingle Jangle. I am so looking forward
(19:19):
to seeing this too. I haven't made the time yet,
but it's on my must watch list, so I don't
let myself watch Christmas movies before Thanksgiving. So that's why
I haven't watched a lot of these Christmas movies at
the time. At the time we're recording this, but yes,
I want you. Jingle Jangle is a new Christmas musical
set in the Victorian era with a I'm not sure
(19:41):
if it's all black or predominantly black cat predominantly black.
It's about a young girl named Journey who is sent
to spend time with her curmudgeon le grandfather Um and
they create toys. And the thing I love about this
movie is that the gentleman who wrote it. David Talbert
had been wanting to do it for a stage play
and just couldn't quite make it work on stage and
(20:02):
couldn't quite get the right tone. And it took him
twenty years, and he had a kid, and then all
of a sudden he was able to collaborate with his
child on on this story. And then he went to
Netflix because he previously had done l Camino Christmas, which
is not a breaking bad movie, but it is a dark,
a dark Christmas comedy, um and uh, Netflix said, hey,
(20:26):
don't make this movie to budget, make the movie you
want and will fund it so to have. And he
wanted to make a movie that showed they're not a
lot of Christmas movies that uh feature black casts, and
he wanted to provide that representation and so on so
many multiple levels, from the representation in the cast and
(20:46):
in the costuming too. The fact that Netflix, who, as
we've talked about before, they make stuff for a wide
variety of people, and a lot of that is not
for me. Yeah, they found a lot of different productions,
some of which seem incredible just on the face of it,
some of which you're like, I did they just have
(21:07):
money left over in the budget that they absolutely had
to spend and that's why they funded this. But but
Jingle Jangle does look like like the preview I saw
was so captivating, and the costumes look so amazing, the
special effects like the whole plot behind it involves a
former apprentice of the grandfather who has stolen the grandfather's
(21:31):
designs and become wealthy using those designs while the grandfather
is kind of toiled in in uh in in poverty.
Really and um Keegan Michael Key plays the former apprentice, Gustafsson,
and he has a costume that makes him look I
don't know if they were specifically going for this, but
(21:51):
to me, he looks like like the Wizard of Oz,
Like he looks like he could have come out of
the Emerald City. And I wonder if that was a
a purposeful choice, but it was just the first thing
I thought. Maybe it's just because his jacket is like
Emerald green, but yeah, it's it's all the classic setup
(22:13):
of your your classic Christmas tale of you know, an
old disillusioned person rediscovering joy through the association with youth
and overcoming great odds. And it's a musical and the
dancing looks amazing and yeah, just it's that kind of
thing that is hitting all the right switches for me
(22:36):
for a feel good Christmas movie. Yeah. Another another one
that I think flew under the radar for me but
is hitting all the right switches is Dear Santa. There
was a two thousand and eleven movie. Is this about
Santa Claus? Who has Is this about Santa Claus? Who
has antlers? And it's not it's not so it's not
d e E R Santa. It's d e A R Santa.
(22:59):
Although I would watch, I would watch d e E
there might be one too many, ease, and there are
Santa as well. Dear Santa. Um. Now this one is about, uh,
this is a documentary about the Operation Santa program the
United States Postal Service does with all of the letters
they get from children who who write to Santa Claus.
(23:21):
And it's it's a little bit more real life, uplifting
and I very much look forward to watching it. Yeah,
it's good to remind ourselves occasionally about the capacity we
have to do nice things, because we often can forget
about that with the the deluge of stressful, negative news
(23:43):
that surrounds us all the time. Well, we have a
full discussion to have coming up about movies that may
or may not be Christmas movies, depending upon as Obi
one Kennoby would say a certain point of view. But
we will it to that after we take this quick break.
(24:13):
So we didn't even really get to talk about all
the movies we wanted to. But that's okay because we're
going to go from the new to old. Like Jonathan said, so, um,
these movies are a few of my favorite things. You
went right for the reference of the one that drives
me nuts the most and it's not even a movie. Well,
(24:35):
I guess the movie is also considered a Christmas movie. Yes,
some people do consider us. So we're talking about the
sound of music, which uh, so arial when you think
of that, do you think of just the musical or
do you think of specifically the song? Uh my favorite things?
So uh, I think when I think of sound of music,
I think of the musical, and I specifically think of
(24:55):
the movie musical. Uh And I go, well, maybe that's
kind of Christmas Eve, but a few these are a
few of my favorite things. Does play at the holiday
season all the time, and so to me, yeah, it's
it's about gifts. It's just a Christmas song. So even
though it's not that one, that one drives me nuts
that it comes on. Like when I listen to a
holiday music station and that song comes on, I get
(25:15):
irrationally angry because I think that is not a Christmas song.
It mentions Christmas in passing in the song. It mentioned
snow in passing in the song, but it is. There's
literally singing about a few of their favorite things. It
could be in the middle of July, it's still still
(25:35):
one of your favorite things. Don't play that on my
holiday station. I feel very strongly about this. Well, I
guess it's got snowflakes on nose and eyelashes, which you're
not normally gonna get. But any they're just they're just yeah,
they're just telling about a few of their favorite things,
which may only happen once in your lifetime. I mean,
(25:56):
kittens usually have what happened what in the spring and summer? Yeah,
you don't get a lot. Well, it's not really up
to us, but typically we see that more in the spring. Okay,
So there are some other movies and there I know
that you feel very passionate about them that people think
are Christmas movies. Um, the I think the most divisive
(26:18):
one that I have ever talked with you about, Jonathan
is die Hard. Yeah. Yeah, there's some people are like
die Hard It's my favorite Christmas movie and I will
die on this hill Hard. It is not a Christmas movie.
It is a movie set during Christmas. It is not
a Christmas movie. Is there a Christmas tree in it? Yes,
(26:39):
there's a Christmas party. No, it is not. It is
not a Christmas movie. It is not. Diehard is an actor.
First of all, Diehard is is the perfect action film,
and that is both a positive and a negative. It's
a negative because die Hard created a new paradigm for
action movies, right. Die Hard started a new trend that
(27:02):
everyone was trying to copy, which is why for many
years in the nineties and even into the early two thousand's,
people would describe action movies as it's die Hard on
a something something so like Speed was die Hard on
a bus and then later die Hard on a boat
because they speed to Um yeah yeah, so so both
(27:25):
good and bad. But die Heart is a phenomenal film
all in its own. It just isn't a Christmas movie.
It does have some Christmas music in it, but it's
not a Christmas movie. See, I might wager a different
opinion because if if everyone had not been at the
(27:47):
at the Nakami Plaza for the Christmas party, there would
not have been nearly as many casualties. So Christmas in
a way fuels everything that happens in that movie. But
it could to me, even though it's and focus on
the Christmas spirit, it is a Christmas movie because without
the Christmas party, nobody would have been there too. It
(28:07):
would have just been a basic corporate robbery. It could
have also been a New Year's Eve party. There was
no reason it had to be a Christmas party. It
could literally have been a party for any reason. It
could have been this is the anniversary of the founding
of the company, and you would still have that same
reason why people get together now. Granted, Christmas party is
the kind of party where you typically have not just
(28:27):
the employees, but often their families there too. Thankfully, I
don't think we see any kids in Die Hard, which
is a good thing considering one the people at the
party are behaving in a way that is not appropriate
for children, and too when when when stuff goes down,
you don't want kids there. But but you see, you
(28:49):
said it could be any time. It wasn't the writer Christmas.
But but again, but again, if you had said that,
there's if you had said it at any other time
of the year or the rest of the story would
still play out as it does. It is not dependent
upon Christmas, so it is not a Christmas movie. It's
not dependent on Christmas. But it does take place at Christmas,
(29:10):
So I think it's a Christmas movie. I think we
might disagree with this. Maybe I'll concede that it is
a winter holiday movie. No, it's an action film, and
that's it. It's an action movie. It's a great action movie.
It's my favorite action movie, to the point where it
actually kind of ruined action movies for me for a
really long time. But it's not Let's move on to
(29:32):
a different movie. Okay, sure, okay, So what do you
think about grim Lets the Christmas movie? No, not a
Christmas It's said it Christmas, and technically, Gizmo the Magua
is is a Christmas present, but it again, the story
does not revolve. There's some cool Christmas Ee stuff in it, like,
there's some cool uses of Christmas in it, But unlike Crampus,
(29:56):
for example, it is not it's not revolving around Christmas.
I also Crampus argument well, because because I think Gremlins
and Crampus are like they're like they're like sister movies there.
They both have a similar tone. They both have a
kind of mean spirited edge to the malicious nous in them.
(30:21):
They both aren't so intense that, you know, like a
younger viewer, someone who's maybe ten to twelve years old,
could probably watch either of those and it would be
it would be a lot, but they could probably handle it.
I mean, I saw Gremlins when I was a kid,
and I turned out mostly okay. But I think Crampus
is around the same way. I didn't watch it until
(30:44):
I was a little bit older. I've never watched Crampus.
I think it would be too scary for me. I
think Gremlins is much more a Christmas movie than die Hard,
and I love die Harden. I like saying Diehard Christmas movie,
not just to annoy you, Jonathan, but primarily to annoy me. Yeah,
but I I I would say on Gremlins is a
Christmas movie because if the entire story focuses around a
(31:05):
Christmas present, I guess I guess I could be more
convinced about Gremlins than die Hard. Um. And the one
reason why I really could go with it is one
of the worst parts of the Gremlins film, but one
of the best parts of Gremlins too, which is when
Phoebe Kates tells the story about why she hates Christmas,
(31:27):
which is the most over the top awful story to
ever have happened to anyone ever really in a in
a Christmas movie. And then in Christmas Too, she they
satirize that with her talking about uh President's Day. I think, yeah, yeah,
her character. I have based RPG characters, Monster of the
Week characters off of her. Um. Okay, what about Shazam
(31:51):
not a Christimer, not a Christian Christmas though I would
agree that that one. I'd agree it's not a Christmas
movie to me either. Winter movie. Yes, Um, I know
that the director really liked Christmas, but um, the holidays,
which is why he said it at that time. But yeah,
to me, it's not a It's not Christmas. Yeah. I
(32:12):
saw that one pretty late, like it had already left
theaters and I caught it on I think I caught
it on a plane actually, And um, I was I
had heard it was entertaining, but my expectations were fairly low,
simply because I had been let down so frequently by
DC superhero movies. Uh, they just weren't for me. I'm
(32:34):
not saying that they were bad movies. I'm just saying
they didn't appeal to me. I didn't like them, with
the exception of Wonder Woman and um this one, I
really liked it was I thought it was really entertaining.
But even as I was watching it, like when you
said when you put it on this list, I didn't
even remember that there was anything about Christmas in that
film at all. Like that, that doesn't even I don't
(32:57):
associate the movie with Christmas, because that's not what I
think of when I think. No grant, I've only seen
the movie one time, but it's not what I think
of when I think of the film, which again, is entertaining.
I recommend it for people who haven't seen it. I
did watch it for the first time last Christmas season. Um, Ariel, Ariel,
you can't. You can't count something a Christmas movie just
(33:19):
because you happen to watch it around Christmas. Well, if
that were the only reason I was counting it as
a Christmas movie. I wouldn't. Okay, here's here's one that
a lot of people disagree on. What do you think
about Love actually, not as a movie, about whether it's
a Christmas movie? Uh, I have never seen Love Actually,
I have never seen I've seen the clips, Like, is
(33:40):
that the one that has the bit where the guy
is at the door and he has the poster board
cards with the words written on it, and he's essentially saying, Hey,
you know, I totally dig you, but you're married, but
I still dig you. So I'm going to totally leverage
this awkward moment and ignore the fact that you are
actually in a committed relationship. So you need to like
(34:03):
totally mac on me because I'm I'm really a cool,
handsome dude. I hate that, Like, I don't have any
context for that scene, but it makes me so mad.
It's um that movie. I enjoyed the movie. It just
it's an anthology of relationships. So I like certain bits
of that movie better than others. Next, Batman Returns not
(34:26):
a Christmas movie. Said at Christmas, I love Batman Returns.
I love it. It's it's got its faults. I don't
think that the version of the Penguin is one that
I particularly agree with. But I think Danny Defito was
great in the movie, so I think I think it
did a great job. I just didn't like that version
(34:47):
of the penguin. Um. But penguins are all about Christmas, No,
they're not. You know that. You know that when Christmas
is over, penguin still exists, right, they don't. They don't
just poff out of existence. Yes, year round. Yeah, I know.
It's it's a shock to the system. Uh. Batman Returns
is not a Christmas movie. Uh. It does, however, have
(35:09):
an amazing performance by Christopher Walking in it. I. Um,
I will agree with you on that one. I love
that Man Returns. Um, I just want, I just wanted.
I like my penguin argument. I know it doesn't hold water.
Uh much like a penguin's wings don't fly. Um. Okay.
Edwards scissor Hands also so Edward scissor Hands I think
(35:29):
of as more of a fairy tale that happens to
be said at Christmas. But it's it's it's this one's
borderline for me because it has some of the magic
that you associate with Christmas stories, right, Like there is
a magical element to Edward scissor Hands, and it really
is got that fairy tale field to it. It's one
(35:50):
of the you know, Tim Burton stuff in general tends
towards the fantastical. Um even his more realistic films still
have elements of that in it, and Edward scissor Hands
is pretty far into the fantastical. So I think of
it more as a fairy tale that that is set
in the winter. But I don't think of it as
a Christmas movie. This one kind of ends at Christmas
(36:12):
with the snow and it's snowing again. And to me,
because it has that final note of you know, now
it snows on Christmas, to me, that makes that that
one note makes the entire thing a Christmas movie. I
don't know a related note, then, what do you think
about The Nightmare Before Christmas? Is that a Christmas movie?
I have never seen that. You've never seen The Nightmare
(36:32):
Before Christmas? You've got to see that. I think you
would really dig it. It's it's a very sweet movie.
I don't think of it as a Christmas movie. Um.
I think of it as a Honestly, I think of
it as a Thanksgiving movie because it's because it's because
the action takes place between Halloween and Christmas. Now, granted
(36:53):
it does end that spoiler alert, it does end at Christmas,
but I don't. I think of it as sort of
that bridging season between Halloween and Christmas. That's where that
movie really lives. So I think the thing is that
I don't like mixing my Hollywoodeen with Christmas. They're two
completely different, like emotional genres for me in real life,
(37:14):
and so it's just never appealed to me to watch
it in movie form. That being said, plenty of people
have told me I should watch it, including like you
and my husband. Uh, just like plenty of people have
told me I should watch Up. Um, I just haven't.
I will probably watch Nightmare before Christmas before I watch UP. Well.
Up is great. The first ten minutes will destroy you. Okay,
(37:36):
Coming to America is Coming to America Christmas story. There's
a dude in a whole lot of Santa suit. It
is not. It is not. Listen, the the bath scene
alone tells me it cannot be a Christmas movie. There
is a line in that scene that will never belong
to a Christmas movie. So no, it is not. Okay,
(38:01):
I I don't really think that was a Christmas movie either.
I want to argue you for comedy's sake, but we're
already running along. So I've got one more Annie. I
don't think of any as a Christmas movie either. Like
it's It's interesting because when I looked at this list,
some of them I do remember being set around Christmas,
and others I think, and I'm like, I don't know,
(38:23):
I don't have any I have no memory of that
taking place around Christmas. Now. It has been a very
long time since I've seen Annie, uh, And I don't
associate with Christmas at all, because Annie is really getting
pretty much like all the comforts that she could want
because she's been adopted by a billionaire. Um so, so
(38:46):
in that case, it's like Christmas almost seems like it's
a overkill because she's already getting everything. But but I
just don't remember it having anything to do with Christmas.
In the stage musical, it's Chris Miss when uh, when
Miss Hannigan and Ruster Lilier caught at the Warbucks mansion.
So gotcha, I you know, I guess I can see
(39:09):
what you're saying there. So really, really where it falls
the line to me is if Christmas drives the plot.
Even if it's not focused on the ideals of Christmas,
it can count as a Christmas movie. To Jonathan, it
seems like if it doesn't uphold the ideals of Christmas
as a part of the movie, then it's not a
(39:29):
Christmas movie. Yeah. No, if it's if it just happens
to be set around Christmas time, that's not enough. You've
got our try harder. Uh Like, it could still be
a great movie, it's just not a Christmas movie. Might
be a movie that you watch around Christmas doesn't make
it a Christmas movie. Well what if we mashed up
a Christmas movie with a not Christmas movie? Would that
(39:50):
make it three quarters Christmas and enough to count for you?
I guess we will find out after this short break,
(40:13):
all right, Ariel, tell everybody what two movies you decided
to mash up together? Because you picked these? I picked these,
which I dug a real hole for myself, you guys,
it was. It was a challenge, but when I gladly accepted.
Originally it was going to be home Alone in Annie
because I liked the dichotomy of uh, someone defending their house,
(40:33):
whereasus someone who was an orphan Um. But then Jonathan
actually pointed out that we've had so many musical mashups recently,
so I changed it. So I really was just begging
you to spare our audience from me singing again. Fair enough,
So we're doing Home Alone, which I will fight tooth
and nail. Is a Christmas movie. Um, and I don't
(40:55):
think Jonathan would disagree on this. No, us not, I don't.
I mean it takes it takes place at Christmas. He's
left at home because his family leaves for Christmas. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yeah,
I know. I know. He talks to Santa, he asked
Santa for his family. It is a Christmas movie. And
Die Hard, which is not a Christmas movie, as we
(41:17):
have already established Christmas music. Uh, do you want to
go first? Ye? You want me to go first? Um,
I'll go ahead and go first. Okay, go first. I now,
we have not shared these with each other, and we
don't know how similar they're going to be. Probably fairly similar.
(41:40):
But I want to hear your pitch. Okay. So this
is Home Hard Lost naka Tomi Plaza. I love it
already because if you if you putting like die Home,
Die Alone is so grim. Yeah, there there die like
(42:00):
it is just there weren't any good combinations. So Homehard lost,
Nackatomi Plasa. So it's Christmas Eve and Kevin McClean aster's
mom because Kevin McAllister is a character and home Alone,
we didn't really deep dive into it. But I want
to get right to the meat. So Kevin mccleanister's mom,
refusing to leave him at home alone, has stuck him
(42:20):
in the worst imaginable place, the kids play area at
Nakatomi Plaza, while she and her new husband Kevin stepdad
Argyle attend her company Christmas party. Our gyle is the
driver in Die Hard, Okay, so just so people can
realize my brilliance, okay. Staring wistfully out the will window
(42:40):
of the kids play area, bemoaning the fact that he
is a mature nine year old stuck in a room
with a bunch of children, Kevin notices a suspicious yet
all too too familiar van pull up to the office building.
On the side of the van, it says Sticky Groober's
uh key bandits were the second iteration of the wet
(43:03):
bandits from Home Alone one and two, so they must
have up to their game. After having been foiled by
a latch key kid twice already um and moved to
corporate crime, Kevin also realizes that if these sticky groupers
ruined his mother's Christmas party, he will be blamed for it. Uh.
You know it's kid logic, go with it, So he
(43:25):
decides to stop them. He's done it twice before, it
shouldn't be any different now. He scours the playroom looking
for anything he can use to his advantage, but all
he finds is a set of legos, a tarantula and
a terrarium, and an empty nerf gun and a bag
of marbles. I guess it's not only that's a that's
a good arsenal for this kid. Uh. He just succeeds
at gathering all these items up when the Sticky Groupers
(43:46):
shoot the window and enter the building, causing enough of
a distraction for Kevin to crawl into the duck system
and out of the blay room. He exits the duck
system at the top of the elevator. I don't know
how duck systems work, but I'm assuming this is aunt.
So he lands like on top of the elevator. In
the elevator shaft. Just as the Sticky Groupers enter, he
drops the direct tarantula through the little latch door at
(44:09):
the top, causing them to hit half the buttons on
the elevator. But he realizes all too quickly that they're
gonna get really sick of stopping on every floor, so
he also jams a bunch of legos into the into
the elevator, works to stop it and get it stuck. Uh.
This leaves him just enough time to load load the
marbles into his NERF gun, aim at the groupers through
the window and take through the little door at the
top of the elevator. Elevator thank you, and take him out.
(44:34):
Just then the legos break, the elevator goes up to
the next floor, the doors open, Kevin gets thrown on
top of the Sticky Groupers, who are now passed out
from being shot in the head with marbles from a
NERF gun, and it opens on the Christmas party. When
Kevin mccleanister's mom sees him, mccleanister's mom sees him, she
blames him for escaping the play paid place, completely overlooking
(44:54):
the fact that he foiled a dangerous corporate robbery, but
because it's Christmas. She's so happy to see him, she
doesn't ground him, and they go home and they live
happily ever after. Okay, so I can tell you pot halfway.
I can tell you that we totally did not go
the same way. So you are you ready for my attempt?
That was a masterpiece? Areal? That was a masterpiece. So
(45:18):
thank you? I am so ready. Yours are always fantastic.
Here we go. Kevin McAllister is returning home after being
away all year, having recently graduated the police academy. He
gets to the family home and discovers, to his shock
that his family isn't there. They've left on a Christmas trip,
completely forgetting that Kevin was on his way back home
(45:38):
to visit them. How can the same thing happen to
the same guy, like eight times, Kevin says. Kevin lets
himself into the family home, having traveled all that way,
and does his best to make merry. He watches old
action movies, dances around, and generally tries to have a
good time. We can see, though, that he is not
having a good time. We see this with occasional glimpses
(46:01):
of his face, which is sad, and the fact that
he's making fists with his toes on the carpet, a
sure sign that he's experiencing anxiety. Late in the night,
a pair of apparent robbers or bandits if you prefer,
break into the house just as Kevin is in the
kitchen making some snacks. Kevin here's them, so he's able
to be quiet and evade notice. But his service revolver
(46:24):
is in his spare room where he had planned to sleep.
He conceals himself and listens in, and soon it becomes
a parent. The bandits are more than just your average
house thieves. For one thing. They are soon joined by
another thief, and another and another, like twenty guys show up.
They're all vaguely European except for one guy who is
(46:45):
clearly American, and he's a hacker because he wears glasses.
These bandits have heard that Kevin's dad has a huge
number of bonds hidden in a safe, which is in
itself in a hidden part of the house and will
require an enormous amount of time to break into, and
so they get to work and before long they're using
various tools to try and break through the safe. Kevin meanwhile,
(47:08):
sneaks around the house quietly setting up various booby traps.
He's without his gun after one thief while just doing
a cursory search, happens across the revolver using tools like
gardening implements, paint cans, ball bearings, crazy glue, hungry Hungry
Hippo's board game, and some steak knives. Kevin McAllister takes
(47:30):
out the bandits one by one, or sometimes one by two,
because you know, he's kind of a badass. At the
end of the movie, it's down to Kevin and the
last two bandits, which are revealed to be his old nemesses,
the Wet Bandits themselves, who are just desperately clinging to
the idea of one last big heist so they can retire.
(47:52):
So Kevin totally shoots them a whole bunch with his revolver,
which I forgot to mention he managed to retrieve I
don't know, like maybe three bandits ago. At the very
end of the film, the phone rings and as Kevin
stands in what is essentially a pile of corpses, he
has a conversation on the phone that sounds like he's
talking with his family. But then at the very end
he says merry Christmas. Mr McClean boom. Kevin mccallister's teacher
(48:16):
at the Police Academy was John McLean. Bet you didn't
see that coming the end. Oh I love it. I
love the twist. Oh my goodness, I thought you were
going to swear for a second. It was a real
roller custy. Yeah. No, there was no yippy kaya ying
in that hot like please me, Mr Falcon, not not
the the But was I loved it? Yeah? Yeah, see
(48:40):
I was. I was trying to think of, like, it's
cool because you actually went to the die hard setting
whereas I went to the home alone setting, and as
I said, like, we did not talk about this beforehand,
so we had no idea what the other person was
going to do before they did it. So that was
kind of that was that was a fun experiment, and
it was just lucky that we both went the opposite way.
(49:02):
You know, I'm sure there are other ways to go
with it too. It's not one or the other. In fact,
if if our listeners come up with ways that they
would like to combine these two classics, one a Christmas
classic and one totally not a Christmas classic, then they
should do that and let us know about them. Yes,
you can reach out to us on social media on
(49:25):
Twitter where at l n C Underscore Podcast, and we're
also on the facebooks and the instagrams. You can post
a message or you can send us a d M.
If we like your ideas and your mashups, will read
them on an episode. And you can also tell Jonathan
that die Hard is totally a Christmas movie. Actually I
won't listen, he won't listen, let him have this this
(49:48):
this holiday, but I'll listen, so you can tell me,
um whatever you think either way, Well that I think
that wraps this one up. I think it's time for
us to wrapped this episode up and then maybe unwrapped
some presents. I agree. So until next time, I'm Ariel
cast In and I'm Jingland Strickland. Happy Holidays. M m
(50:28):
m m M. The Large Nur John Collider is a
production of I Heart Radio and was created by Ariel
cast In. Jonathan Strickland is the executive producer. This show
is produced, edited and published by Tory Harrison. For more
podcast on my heart Radio, visit the I heart Radio app,
(50:49):
Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.
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