4 Weddings & a Funeral with Joe & Kendall, Heather Martin and Krystal Nielsen

Ashley is letting you inside during a bachelor nation dinner party as we hang out with Bachelor Nation pals on this special bonus episode. 

Joe & Kendall give us an update on their life since moving in together and we find out if they’d ever object at a wedding! Heather M “never been kissed” from Colton’s season fills us in on her life after the show and which is better for an altar kiss at a wedding: a peck or a makeout session? 

We celebrate Four Weddings and a Funeral as Ashley lets us in on who is officiating her wedding!

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See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
This is the Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous podcast
with her Radio. Hey, guys, welcome to the third Almost
Famous podcast without Ben Higgins. Sorry, guys, this will happen
with me. I hope you guys missed me in a
couple of weeks when Jared and I are away for
our wedding and our honeymoon. By the way, Jared's here

(00:23):
and I was just about to introduce you. I know,
I'm kind of ruining the surprise. I'm sorry that I'm
replacing Ben Higgins. I feel like Ben's like a Mercedes
and I'm kind of like a you know, like a
Toyota Corolla. I'll get you from A to B, but
I'm not going to be as sexy as Ben when
he does it. Jared, come on, now, maybe I'm not
giving myself credit, or maybe I'm overrating myself. Jared, you

(00:46):
are a Rolls Royce. Well you have to say that
you're marrying me. You don't want to marry a range Rover.
How about a land Rover Discovery. Jared prefers land Rovers
over range Rovers. This is his new car ever since
we Enterprise rentals. It is its goals. But I'm like,

(01:07):
I heard that these land rovers and ranger rovers don't
last very long. Yeah, which is quite miles. If you
guys are car experts out there, let us know. Well anyway,
the reason that we are recording this episode without okay,
moving on, we are doing this bonus episode because we

(01:30):
are having the most luxurious like most Hollywood, I feel
like I'm in I feel like I'm in big little
eyes right now. I'm currently drinking a glass of champagne
as we speak, because like it's so luxurious and so posh.
We're at this beautiful Jared and My Ultimate Decord house
right now. It's like our HDTV Dreams home heart reached

(01:53):
out perfection. I don't even know how to describe it.
It's just an overload of perfect It's all like Jared
and I want to make our house kind of like
crafts craftsmany modern but not like to modern, like clean
but warm. We have We're in this house where it's

(02:15):
got like, um, well it's called like what was called ceilings. No,
you're pointing up the wood things. Um, there's beams. It's
an odd shaped that. This house is awesome. It's got beams.
Beams are beautiful. Like there's also a fireplace, right there

(02:37):
that you didn't. That's not that, that's not super unique anyway,
Welcome to our lives. This is the Ashley and Jared Show,
and we're just talking the way that we talk on microff. Well,
we are talking about weddings. So should we just start like,
let me start kind of fresh right now and saying,
we're all gathered at this very beautiful Beverly Hills mansion

(02:59):
with a out of our bachelor friends right now because
Hulu has put together this amazing um we're calling it
a summer sooray souray for us in celebration of their
new rom com esque Mindy Kaling produced show, Four Weddings
and a Funeral. They thought, of all podcasts, who is like,

(03:25):
who's related? Who can relate to this show the most?
And it is the almost famous podcast because four weddings
in a funeral. So it's kind of like every year
on The Bachelor, we get like four engagements and we
get well, we get more than one funeral, we get
a couple of funerals. Usually the funerals last in the
final four feels like a funeral. Oh, I was going

(03:46):
to say, like the ones that like continuously get out
of a show. Without a significant other, kind of like
me for a while. We're talking about you. You're engaged.
I don't mean now, I mean like I used to be.
The funerals are so well. I was gonna say, I
guess Nick would be the most polarizing one man. Big
is probably the ultimate funeral. It's really, it's really, it's yeah,

(04:10):
he's the bachelor funeral. No come up with another one another,
Oh god, analysis at the table behind us. I would say, oh, Annaly,
she's so sweet, poor girl. I'd say Bokowski, not in
a bad way, just because is obviously a prominent name.

(04:34):
Right now, he's back on Paradise. He's after his retirement.
He did retire, he came out of retirement for this season.
He's kind of like Jordans come back with the four five, which,
if you guys don't remember, Jordan wore the number forty
five when he came back from retirement and then went
back to his traditional three. I know. I'm really about
nineties NBA basketball. Yeah, so we are here in celebration

(04:57):
of four weddings in the funeral again. It is a
Mindy Kayle produced TV show and it's on Hulu, and
I'm I'm very excited about it coming out. I did
get to see a little sneak peek. It's really good.
If you like you know, well, yes, every every girl
I feel like of the millennial generation relates to Mindy
in some way. That's why I said, Okay, if you

(05:19):
like her, you're gonna like this show. And everybody likes her. Hi,
I'm cute, I'm funny, I'm awkward, I'm quirky, I'm really
unlucky in love. She's the best. Uh, this show is
really fun and a lot of it has. The first
episode that I got to see revolves around a wedding,
and one of the speeches at the wedding was totally butchered,

(05:40):
as I feel like a lot of them are. Jared
and I found out some information this week about the
speeches at our wedding, and we would like to regale
you with this tail and we would like your feedback,
And if you have passionate feedback, you should email my
sister because she's the center of the problem. Pretty much
story goes, Ashley's sister, Lauren, is the maid of honor. Obviously,

(06:04):
she has to give a speech to the wedding because
that's what made of honors do. She hates public speaking,
and so now we're kind of a little bit of
a conundrum because she's very nervous and unsure if she
wants to do tell us tell her what she told
our wedding well, we'd all you know, could also been
the telephone effects. So we found out this information from
our wedding planner, and we, guys, we know how this works.
One person tells somebody something and then it gets turned

(06:25):
into a different thing, and then they tell them something different. Anyway,
point is from what we heard she Ashley's made of honor,
wants to do a speech at the rehearsal dinner and
not the wedding because it's a more intimate, smaller setting.
She's going to feel more comfortable giving a speech rather
than in front of, you know, potentially a hundred and
seventy five ish people, where half of them she might

(06:49):
really not know who they are, because it might be
my side of the family who she has not met yet.
But it's less I've actually find it less ner racking
to talk in front of people I don't know. A
room of people I don't know is less ner racking
than a whole bunch of people I really care about
when you when, don't you think? Um, yeah, I don't know.

(07:10):
I don't know. That's a good question. I'm trying to
think of high school, but I guess that's a bad comparison.
I don't know. The classes that I felt like the
closest to i'd sometimes get the most nervous with, because
if I didn't really have a connection with them, I'd
assume that they weren't even listening. But I do think
a wedding is a little different in that case. And also,
my friends were far more torturous in high school. You know,
my guy friends would just make fun of me for anything.

(07:31):
Now my friends are far more supportive, So I'd rather
give a speech in front of them because they would
just tell me it's good, even though if even if
I butchered it just to try to be nice. But
back in high school, even if I killed the speech,
they would be like, Bro, you sucked. Yeah, you know
it's high school. Girls don't do that. Um anyway, So
this is just like something that I have been obviously

(07:54):
sort of dreaming of my whole life. Like my sister
and I have always joked about giving speeches at each
other's weddings, and we've always honestly joked about Lauren's stage
fright or public speaking fear. What happens if you're not
Lauren's made of honor? Jared, That's that's the weirdest thing
I've ever heard you say. I was just thinking, how
awkward would it be if you made Lauren your maid

(08:17):
of honor? And then the past couple of years, Lauren
was like, you know what I want somebody else? Jared,
That's like, I'm gonna cry. This thing you've ever said,
I'm just thrown out. This is you guys. If you
like follow my life to any degree, and because you
listen to this podcast, I feel like you may you
know how close I am to my sister. We've lived
together for many years. In fact, she just lived with

(08:39):
Jared for the past year, and you saw us I'm
Paradise together and you see how close we are. We
have a podcast like what we are like Sniamese Twins.
What if she wants me to be her maid of honor?
You know, like that Patrick Patrick Dempsey movie. Excuse me,
I knew that? What is that? What was that called
maid of honor? But it was spelled M A D. Yes,

(09:02):
it was. I will bet ten dollars made of honor.
M A d. Yes, Sorry, I'm fine, I'm not I'm
not even wagering on this because he might be right. Well,
that's not fun. M A d. E alright, feeling good,
feeling strong, Okay. Anyway, So I've always joked how many
times do I say? Anyway, I've always joked about my

(09:24):
sister being nervous. My friends and I have always talked
about how like somebody else was going to have to
read her speech at my wedding. But now she goes
to our wedding planner and she's like, um, so I'm
trying to get out of giving this an but that's

(09:44):
what he made it seem like. And I was like, ry,
let's not be dramatic because then we got to get
a replacement, and it's just come on now, thinks. I
guess my question for you guys listening is my sister
says that her having to give a speech to the
reception is going to in her entire day and she's
not gonna be able to focus on anything else until
it's over. Should I just allow her to do it

(10:07):
at the reception? Or should I allow her to do
at the rehearsal dinner. Should I make her do it
at the reception or do we kind of find this
happy medium where like she records her speech or she
lip sings her speech. I know that people are going
to really hate me right now, but that's okay. She
has to do it. I think she has to do

(10:27):
it because I know everybody's going to say that Lauren
should feel comfortable and don't make her do anything that
she doesn't want to do. Fair enough, I understand that,
But at the end of the day, sometimes you suck
up your own pride or insecurities to do something for
somebody that's very important in your life on one of
the most important days of their life and not for me.

(10:48):
She's not doing it for me or anybody else except
for you. You know, I don't even know we're really dramatizing,
you know, if she doesn't want to do it at
the wedding, we're just creating storylines right now. What if
she objects when I before I say I do actually, okay,
that's a that's a question for the next topic. I

(11:09):
want to finish this out by saying I think it's
like my sister is not a shy person at all.
She's super outspoken and blunt and funny, and you know,
like she doesn't hide in the shadows. She doesn't come
across as a nervous person. So that's why I feel
like I don't even believe her fear public speaking, because

(11:32):
I'm like Lauren, You're just like you're very out She's
not outgoing, but you know she's not afraid to talk
to people. No, I agree. I'm just thinking of people
that would object before we say I do, Okay, we'll
move on to this now. I was thinking Dean would
do it just to mess things up, just to just
did he say that the other day. I'm going to
do it just for like giggles. Yeah, I don't think

(11:55):
he'll actually do it, but I think there's a part
of him that might just yell it and then he'll smile.
Now I know, I agree. If anything, well, I guess
we can tell we can should we should break some news,
she breaks some news about our Officientum, I will, I will,
I will say, I will, I will tease it a
bit so because it is is it today's day July.

(12:20):
Let's not give the exact dataway. And we are recording
this right now, no, no, Jared re recording this right
now on July. And that's why I'm telling people why
we have to make this. We made this decision. Oh,
I mean, listen, We've talked a lot of about it,
a lot having Tanner officiate our wedding because he's been

(12:40):
very close to both of us and been very close
to our relationship and has been there through every step
of the way, both him and Jade um. But Jade's
pregnant and we don't know when the baby will come,
so we may have had to change some plans. We
had to go with our backup efficient. I think we've
been pretty open the entire time at ver since we
found out that Tanner and Jade's baby, we can tell

(13:03):
you is do the same week as our wedding, okay,
the same week. So when they told us that back
in February, it was we were like, okay, well, we're
gonna have to get a back up. And for some reason,
I really truly thought that she was going to have
the baby a month early. Yeah, now we are a
lot closers taken out. Well, I think what really changed

(13:26):
our mind one, I think we both thought Jade was
going to have the baby early, just because Emmy came
a month early. And for those of you who don't know,
which probably everybody listened to this podcast knows, Emmy is
Tanner and Jade's firstborn daughter who came a month early.
And apparently if a mother has a baby early, there's
more likelihood that if she gets prediant again, she'll have

(13:47):
a baby early again. Um, but that didn't happen. Well,
she she may still have it early, but not as early,
not a month earliest. So when we found out the news,
we obviously had to go with the backup efficient or
at least plan, you know, when when we we kind
of gave him too, like you know, we gave him
until a certain date, We're like, if they don't have
the baby by then, then we're probably gonna have to

(14:07):
go with the backup because we actually have to work
on getting our ceremony. Yeah now, because we don't want both,
you know, both people to have to go through the
whole production of of of officiating, including like what to wear,
what to prepare, what to say, things of that nature.
So you know, the date that we kind of set
came in pass, and I think Ashley and I had
to make the decision of what direction we were going

(14:29):
to move forward, and and kind of sucks because as
much as we love the person who's officiating, which I
don't want to spoil it because I'd rather just have
I want to keep it. I want to keep that
a surprise. And we we love him. I mean, I
can't speak highly you know, we speak so highly of him. Um.
He's just an awesome, awesome person, and we're very excited.

(14:49):
I'm very excited to be standing at the altar with
this particular person. Um. But of course there's a part
of this we have to say that No, it's not
Ben Um, it's uh, it's somebody that we talked a lot. Uh, yes, sorry,
And people I remember when I first we first said
it was Tanner, people got annoyed at me because back
before we were together, I at one time made a

(15:11):
passing comment on the on the podcast then I would
love to have been officiate my wedding. That would I
think that would be wonderful. But now that it's Jared
and I together, there were other people that I felt
like had been more involved in Jared and I getting together. Yeah,
I mean everybody knows the history, you know, if they're

(15:33):
fans of you. They know the history of our relationship,
and so I think there have been certain people within
that time period that have been very instrumental and not
only our relationship and engagement, but our friendship as well.
And I think when we got together and got engaged
and we're deciding who we want to officiate our wedding,
we were thinking about those people that had been so
integral and that not that Ben hasn't been, but I think, um,

(15:56):
there's just been other people that we thought of that
were like, Okay, this is the person that we want there,
that I want standing at the altar with me because
they've been there every step of the way, and we
knew that their tone of the ceremony that they put
together is going to be like just a tone that
we feel I can't wait. I mean, he already told

(16:16):
us what the first thing he's gonna say is, and
I mean crying. And so I'm very excited. I'm just
excited for the wedding to get here because we're we're
you know, the clock sticking now it's almost here, and
it's just been a really stressful and I think it's
it sucks because anybody who's planning a wedding. I think
it's been at this point now where everything is just

(16:38):
becoming logistics and about money and number counting, and it
just you kind of like, forget, holy crap, we're getting
married here soon, and we're getting bogged down with so
many different materialistic things that I can't even enjoy the
moment because we just got to like get through this.
And that's what really stinks. It's like, Okay, well we

(17:00):
just got a hardy up and get through these things
and then we'll enjoy you know, the time after that.
But the time after that is going to be like
three days before the wedding. And so that's I think
the hardest part because you put so much time, at
least Ashley and I have put so much time and
effort into this wedding, trying to make it the best
we possibly can um for us, our guests, uh, and
just make it, you know, the wedding we've always dreamed of.

(17:23):
Um that it sucks that were so stressed out by now,
and so I don't know, I think both of us
am trying to take a step back and enjoy the moment.
Let's but we don't want you to make it seem
like this is a funeral, But we do want to
thank Hulu for bringing us together tonight to celebrate their

(17:46):
new show, Four Weddings and a Funeral. Four Weddings in
a Funeral is a new Hulu original series produced by
Mindy Kaling. The four main characters in the series are
friends from college. Mile lives in New York, while her
other three closest college friends are in London. One of
your closest friend lives in New York. I have a
couple of friends of New York at one in state,

(18:07):
one in the city, and I really only get I
get to see them like a couple of times a
year at big events like my bridle shower that we
just had. So the wedding is bringing people together from
all differ parts of the country and that's one of
the that's one of the things we're most excited about.
Nobody from London as of yet. But you never know
what's going to happen in the next few weeks. But

(18:28):
you can catch the premiere of the new romcom series
Four Weddings at a Funeral July at thirty one only
on Hulu. Now we are joined by a couple who
I don't want to put any pressure on you, but

(18:49):
would have a wedding in their future. They've been together
for a year now. We're joined by Joe and Kendall.
Hello there, Hey guys. So we were talking about wedding
speeches a minute ago. Have you ever been to a
wedding where there was somebody who just bombed at this speech? Yes? Okay,

(19:11):
and tell your stories. You want me to go first, okay.
So it was my cousin's wedding, and it was my cousin.
She cried the entire speech, but not because she was sad,
not because she was sad, because she was so nervous
and she couldn't deliver the speech. And I know how
that is because I do get nervous, but she was.
It was so bad and it went on for I

(19:34):
hope she doesn't listen to this, actually, but it was.
She probably will. It went on for like twenty five
minutes where people were like, oh my god, this is horrible,
and a part of me wanted to get up and
stop it, but I didn't. Um And then that's really
that's crying. Because she was standing up there, you would

(19:56):
think that she had just been She went through the
entire Your speech was probably like to notebook pages full
of you know, a lot she did, and she didn't
want to you know, she couldn't give it up. Hold on,
I'm not joking. So how I believe every second, every word?
How long were her crying episodes? So she would like,

(20:18):
say a paragraph, cry for three minutes, and then I
would say she would say maybe two sentences and then cry.
Are you sure she wasn't just overly emotional? Why do
you think it was crying from nerves because she was shaking. Okay,
so she was nervous, but but she it was her cousin.

(20:41):
I mean, who gets really that emotional cousin When a
cousin gets married, men they're close. But it wasn't like
just like a regular cousin getting married and she's given
a speech, but she was nervous. There was a lot
of people there. It was like four people. That I'd
be nervous in front of four people, but it was

(21:03):
still all the worst speech. Okay, Kendall, how about your um.
I actually used to be a wedding photographer assistant. Why
do I feel like you could basically go through the
most random occupations and kenda that I've had literally so
many different weird jobs. But yes, I was an assistant
for photographer for weddings and so I've seen a lot
of different speeches. Um, the worst speech, I feel really

(21:27):
bad because I think it was the bridesmaid. I'm sorry,
the maid of honor, and I feel like she really
tried to be funny in her speech, but her entire speech,
she was saying how she didn't like the groom when
they first met. And she was like, yeah, I used
to crete so many bananas. I used to call him
a monkey, and no one laughed, like literally no one laughed. Yeah,

(21:48):
And we're just sitting there like She's like, yeah, I
just didn't like him when we first met. And I
was like, you don't deserve my friend, and she just
kept going and no one was like laughing at all.
She's like, uh god. There was the speech basically that
we at the wedding we were at in January. What
was he saying that I don't remember specifically. He was
the brother of the bride and he was just total

(22:09):
hard oh you know what I mean, like like like
like a tool, yeah, railing on the groom and we
thought he was going to like lighten up and turn
a corner. He was the bride's brother. He had like
a little some little so he had a little I
don't know, let him speak, but he was just I

(22:32):
mean everything. It was even funny. It was just like, yeah,
the groom's a dick. Yeah. I was like, and then
just silence, and you're like, wait, was that? Am I
supposed to be like? It was one of those moments
where everybody at the tables were looking at each other
and being like, oh god, we feels so bad. It
was fantastic. It was great. I thought it was the
best speech I ever heard. The entertainment value. You guys

(22:56):
look forward to a wedding, I look forward to actually
giving one. Oh how many of you done? I've never
given a speech, you know, But I mean that's like,
I really want my brother to get married for that,
for that selfish reason that I could get go up
there and be like I think he'd everyone doing tonight.
Oh yeah, he'd took a whole stand up comedy spot.

(23:17):
Do you do stand up? Now? Are you trying to do?
I might get back into it. I did it back
into it. Yeah, I did it before I did the
whole reality. I was going to say, like, can we
talk about growth? Here, you were the most nervous man
coming out of the limbo. Well, I wasn't good at
stand up, but well, I love the parts. I love

(23:38):
the wedding speeches. They're my favorite part of weddings. And
I don't understand why so many people are like, oh,
it's the speeches. Are they over yet? Like they're the
best part here, the whole fare backstory of everything, Like
that's the whole fairy tale that leads up to the
actual moment, Like that's very much worthy of time. Have
you guys planned out who would give speeches at your

(24:02):
you know, weddings in your head? Oh? Yeah, I would
have my sister hands down give a speech. But we
were talking about how my sister is too nervous to
give a speech and wants to do it at the
rehearsal Dinners. It doesn't seem like a nervous person. That's
exactly why I said, she can't get away with it. Oh,
she she'll feel fine, though, I think once she gets
up there, it's yeah, hopefully she won't cry and shake

(24:24):
the entire time like the person Joe's time. She'll probably
be up there for twenty five minutes, just saying nonsense.
As she's crying. Uh, have you guys talked about it? Wait?
We didn't talk. Wait who do you want to give
us your wedding? I would have my brother. I only
have one sibling. So now we're really close. Yeah. Is
he still in Chicago? He is. He's a policeman. Policeman

(24:45):
in Chicago. It's a badass. Yeah, that's a tough, tough
right there. Um, all right, so you guys been together
for a year. Now, know what your anniversary is because
we did not. Yeah, we don't really know. I think August.
I think sometimes in August that's when we officially announced

(25:05):
that we were together. Yeah, I've known you for over
a year. Yeah, we've been living. We've basically I've been
living with her ever since. How is it is it?
How's living together? It's easy? I would just say it's easy.
I mean that's I think that's how you can tell
a relationship works, is when you live together you feel
like that's just fun, you know it is? Yeah, I

(25:27):
always find that with Ashley and I. One of the
best things about our relationship is that I never really
feel like I need time away from her. There's past
relationships where I just feel like I need to be
away from this person for a little while, just to
kind of get some air. But it never a lot
of the times when I'm with Ashley, there is this
sense of being alone but not it's weird. I can

(25:51):
understand that it's a great feeling, though, because there's there's
really has not been a moment yet where I've thought
I need to get out of the house. That's great.
Sometimes I feel like you are at that point, but
it's nice to know that you feel like we've never
gotten not out of the house, maybe out of the room. Yeah,
I never feel like I have to. Joe will literally
go on a fifteen minute run. I'm like, when are

(26:11):
you coming back? Like what happened today? And it did
happen today? Well, because I like jumped on a bed
and hurt my neck, So I haven't been let's talk
about that. She's jumping on Bedstill jump on the bed,
come on, hold on. So Joe went for a run
and you thought this is a great opportunity for me

(26:32):
to jump on the bed by myself. No, I jumped
on the bed previous to the run and I hurt
my neck, so I couldn't go on a run because
it irritated my neck too much. You're talking about like
mcaulay culkin and home alone, jumping on the bed trying
to video. She was getting that I wasn't jumping on
the bed, and then I tried to leap over the
table and jump on the bed and I almost broke
my head. What we do to freaking for freaking social media?

(26:53):
You know, we're putting our body at jeopardy. I kind
of want to be able to fly on the wall
in your household right now. It's a lot of fun.
It is a lot of pillows and jumping on beds
and pillows. You guys have a lot of pillow pillows. Yeah.
We Initially it was supposed to be a pillow fight,
and then it went from a pillow fight to jumping
on the bed. Then it turned to something else. Then

(27:18):
it was like Jared and I need to like start
getting like our hearts up more. Guys, it was a nap.
Do you think I'm talking about? Were very healthy? You know, baby,
we do? You know, we get it on. I want
to take the white away from this guy. I have
a drinking lemonade. I just want to keep I just

(27:40):
wanted Joe to keep talking, right now I'm gonna come
out next. Joe has really come out of his shell
since we met him. This is where. Yeah, it was
very hard. I remember when you first interviewed me. Oh
my god, it was you were the hardest interview I
ever had. I wasn't. I wasn't easy. But now it's
just now you can't get him to stop talking. I
like it. How was how was your time in the badchut?

(28:01):
Was cool? You know he met the love of my life.
Oh no, not bachelorette. That was Paradise. Paradise not even
meet the bachelorette did right there, and she said that
he was she was. He was so nervous that it
was like actually a turn off for her, which is
why I didn't get through that night. That's what she said.

(28:25):
I'll remember that one. Maybe I'm putting words into beccas.
It probably was probably a turn off, probably like if
we you know, it wasn't couldn't have an easy, flowey conversation.
I loved that Joe was nervous. I mean, I think
the first time we hung out in Paradise, he brought
me this whole plate of fruits and vegetables and started
like naming all the different fruits and vegetables, and he

(28:45):
was so sweat I was sweating and I and then
I knew that I was sweating, and she called me
out and it just kept coming and I'm like, oh
my god, I thought it was so cute. This guy's
well hydrated on the bach ret Rebecca's. I walked up
to him like, so, like, what's your pet peeve? And

(29:05):
then after I said, I'm like, oh my god, what
I felt like my grandmother right now. And she was
so confused, She's like, what what's your pet peeve? Um?
When people stand in front of me at the airport
waiting for their luggage, what I do have me to
say about that? I hate when people walk right in
front of you when you're luggage. It's like, this is

(29:27):
my lane. I agree with you. You You had a guy,
he said the other day, like the bag dropped and
he goes, excuse me, my, that's my bag, and the
guy literally just kept standing there. I mean, it was
l a what did I expect him to be nice
to me? I'm in the wrong town, that's true. It's like,
my bag is faw superior to your back. That's a
weird pet peeve. That and people at Disneyland. They walk

(29:51):
really slow. Oh yeah, one things are bad. One thing
that Joe's had to learn about being in a relationship
with me is that my family goes. My dad works
for Disney, so we're always going to Disneyland. So we
had to deal with the slow walkers of Disneyland. We
had to have a serious conversation. We did actually have
a very fact that I told him, Like, listen, I
just I can't keep going to Disneyland, just like I'm

(30:14):
a grown adult. Reason why you U should go. Jared
wants to go to Disneyland and especially Universal Studios way
more than we do. Well, they just the Jurassic World
ride just open was technically Orlando. He doesn't want to
go around here. He wants to take a trip to
Orlando just for the well, Orlandos is far better. That
is way better. Also, Harry Potter, the Harry Potter Land

(30:37):
different is way better. I mean I haven't been, but
I've heard stories. The Different Bank is there. Yeah, you're missing.
The world is even way better than Disneyland. I'll just
say it. I think everyone's thinking it's massive better. There's
four different parks in disney World. Yeah, Disneyland. It's like
a little a puddle. I mean, they opened up Star

(30:59):
Wars Galaxy, which is really anyway, we don't talk about anyway.
Let's go back to your weddings. Well, well, okay, fine, Jared,
you asked the next question, then I have the next one.
All right. Well, I was just gonna say, we're talking
about who lose four weddings in the funeral? So we're
talking about weddings here. You guys have been together for

(31:19):
over a year. You're in the Bachelor World. Been together
for a year is pretty much like growing old together.
Is there an engagement? Have you guys talked about the future? Kids, engagement, marriage? Yeah,
we actually are. You guys just keep having pillow fights.
That's a part of the engage, which is a fantastic thing.
Not saying a bad thing. That's part of the engagement.

(31:40):
There's gonna be like a ring inside the pillow and
I'll like get hit in the head with it. Now.
But we I mean, we talked about I mean, I
guess I feel like since we've met, engagement has been
a part of the conversation, which is weird. It's Bachelor World,
you know. Yeah, And we've also I mean, I think
we're each other's longest relationship we've ever been in. So
really it's interesting for both of you. A year is

(32:02):
your longest. Yeah, yeah, a year is my longest too.
We've been together for a year, and we've been together
for a year and a half. Yeah, well, actually my
longest I was about say, your math made no sense.
They're my longest relationship is a year. We've been together
for a year and a half. My real, real relationship
that was beyond a few months. Yeah, my longest relationship

(32:23):
is four years. It was a big one. That's a
long long time ago. Early it was like ninety So
there will be an engagement in our future if we
last four years. For the four years I'm saying the
four years a timeline really, well, I mean for me,
I would definitely I wanted to be a surprise, so

(32:44):
I'm hoping to do it on the next season of
The Bachelor. But yeah, I mean I wanted to be
a surprise, and I feel like we are. I mean,
we are very much in love, and we have a
great time and we enjoyed living together. Comfortable with you
idea of engagement, I would say, I mean, you know,
it could come any day now. But it's going to

(33:05):
be a little bit. Is it happening right now? He's
getting something from his pocket. My last question for you
guys kind of well, in this in this Hulu show
for weddings, in the Funeral, the groom is kind of
in love with the bride's best friend and there's like

(33:29):
a lot of awkwardness at their wedding that you see
at the end of the first episode, and I'm thinking
that would have been one of the circumstances. Oh, that's
kind of that's kind of how it is. Um, he
was like, I don't do like. I'm not doing. I'm
not going to marry you. How have you ever been
to a wedding where does anybody know what? He don't do?

(33:52):
Not like? I do like I do, not do I
do I do? Jared, I don't I do I do
no like. I backed out and he says, I don't
do He just didn't actually say that I don't want
to marry alight. I don't love you. I love your sister, guy.
I have a twin sister. So yeah, that's true. This

(34:15):
is well, that's a whole conversation. Have you guys ever
been to a wedding or heard stories where somebody either
says I don't they back out the day of or
somebody who says I object I actually did a whole
podcast episode, and if you're really interested, you go to
my other podcast and in search it. But we did

(34:37):
a whole episode of people um with objections at the
altar and there were surprisingly, we got enough stories for
a whole podcast episode. Joe's nodding his head over here.
I have a great one. Okay, good for you. I
personally don't know the guy, but I heard this. Okay.
So the day of the wedding, he found out, like

(34:57):
a week before the wedding that she was sleeping with
someone else. This is usually how it is, okay. So
what he did was and he got he had pictures
of them together, like sleeping together. So he printed out
a bunch of pictures, printed out a bunch of pictures,
put him underneath all the seeds at the wedding. Oh
my god, this is worse than the story I was

(35:17):
gonna say. And then as he was about to say
I do he called her out. I think they had
a projector screen or something and boom, and he said, like,
look under your seats um, she's you know whatever, YadA YadA, YadA,
and then you know, YadA YadA over sex me. Is
that a sign? Fold quarter? And and he walked out,

(35:41):
So the story dropped. The story that I heard was
very similar. When the bride was supposed to read her vows,
she ended up reading text messages between the groom and
the mistress. Such an expensive way of right, call out.
We're still having dinner afterwards, like they said that they did.

(36:04):
They win partied afterwards, like they took advantage of it. Yeah,
I mean you have to. I mean you only live once,
so yeah, find out your spouse is cheating. Just do
it at the wedding. Suppose about the wedding. That's like
a whole crazy stuff. Guys. Well, Joe Kindnell, thank you

(36:24):
for joining us, of course, on this very special four
weddings in a fuerial episode in the Almost Say podcast.
Yes and Joe, before you go, we heard something really
cool that you're doing. Oh yeah, I have a clothing
line that I will be dropping August first. It's called
Frown Clothing. You can follow us on Instagram at Frown Clothing.
So frown we are doing the word frown upside down

(36:45):
and we have partnered with a charity called Smile Train
that fixes cleft lip. So it's incredible. Yeah, and we
have hoodies and t shirts and we're going to drop
a bunch of different and we're spreading smiles. Yes, and
they can little positivity in this negative social media world totally.
And I'm assuming everybody can find that on your Instagram

(37:06):
and you can definitely find that on my Instagram and
on our Instagram at Frown Clothing. Why was cliff Lips
a thing for you? Because it went it just went
hand in hand with what we were trying to with
just yeah, with smiling and it works. And Smile Trains
a great um charity. They're awesome, awesome, We're excited. August onest,

(37:29):
August first check out or August seventh, I don't know,
I'm not true the first week August. Keep everybody on
their toes. Stay tuned, guys, August first or seven. I
know you guys are gonna watch Four Weddings in the
Funeral after this podcast because you've just heard it talked
about too much for you not to just break your
curiosity and click on it when you see it on Hulu.

(37:52):
It's under their original series relationships are forged and broken.
Political scandals are exposed. London social life lampooned, love affairs
ignited in DAWs and of course there are four weddings
and a funeral. Of course, Duffy has a secret crush
on Maya and Craig is trying to help a secret crush.

(38:15):
Have I ever had a secret crush? I feel like
all of my crushes in high school or secret. I
never told my friends about them. What about you, babe?
Oh yeah, we talked about this on a podcast a
while ago, about a crush you had in high school
but you never had the guts to tell him that
you actually liked them. No, that was in grad school.
Oh well, for me, it was a high school girl.
Then you did this episode before We're Together. Yeah. I

(38:35):
sent her flowers on Valentine's Day. I don't know if
you guys remember that in high school you were able
to like send little chocolates or flowers to like somebody's
home room desk. I did that, and then I didn't
have the guts tell her I liked her, And I
was like, oh, I just I just wanted you to
have a good day. You're just such a cute little
Tubby kin Terrible. You can catch all the drama in
Four Weddings and a Funeral, a new rom com series

(38:58):
produced by Mindy Kaling, premiering July thirty one, only on Hulu.
Hey guys, we are joined now by Heather Martin from
Colton season. I'm sorry, but you were notoriously known for
having your first kiss with Carlton. So now I got
to ask, how do you feel about couples practicing their

(39:22):
wedding altar kiss? Practicing it? Don't you feel like you
need to practice it? We're getting up. They've never heard
of that my entire life. I'm getting married a little while. Um,
what are you talking about, babe? We were talking about
how you better not pick me up there. That was
a joke. Of course, I'm not gonna he does. Now
we joke. Now he pecks me in real life and

(39:43):
he goes, okay, let's go Wait. Is that a thing
to practice? Yeah? Never heard of that. I think Actuley's
making this up. I want to make sure that we
have like a tasteful romantic kiss. What is that entail? Like?
What is it tasteful? A real lip lock but no tongue. Okay,

(40:03):
that's fine, do we need to practice like we've done
that a million times? I mean timing how long it
will be? You wanted to be absolutely perfect? Is that
you're saying? I think it should be. I think we
should be rehearsed, like once or twice. I've never thought
about that ever. I just thought kissing was kissing. Whatever

(40:24):
it feels right in the moment, babe. If a peck
feels right, I think I think we should just do it.
There's a couple of things that I tell Jared. If
he were to do on our wedding peck me at
the altar and then put too much gel in his hair,
I'd be like, Okay, I'm mad, Good Lord in Heaven,
would you rather have? Would you rather have a peck
or like him? Like go at it? Like at it?

(40:47):
Of course? Yeah, head, you'd rather you'd rather at the alter?
Could you imagine seeing a bride and groom or any
couple up there just give a peck as if they
don't passionately love each other on the on their wedding day,
I'd rather see like tongue saliva. I think it pec too.

(41:09):
I think of peck too. Know what peck is like?
Do they like each other. When I watch wedding shows
like wedding docuseries, I always say I have seen some sloppy,
gross kisses at the I'll say that that's not that's
not appealing. No one likes it. No one likes it.
Nobody likes But peck is true. You do think, like,
do they actually like it? Yeah, it's like, come on, guys,

(41:30):
it's your wedding day. I know you're getting married, but
at the end of the day, let's show some emotion
and passion here. Anyway, Heather, you were on Colton season.
What are you up to now? Have you? Have you
kissed anybody else? She hasn't. Everyone asked me that feels no,
I have not. I have not. I asked her this
a couple of weeks ago. Yeah, well, one, it's it's

(41:53):
obviously your choice. It has to be. You are a striking,
beautiful woman. It's true. I'm saying that be nice to
actually don't kill me like, it's true. It's true. It's
always like this weird thing now that because I like
to compliment everybody, but it's weird as a complimenting. Alright, great, perfect,

(42:13):
as long as you know if you were feel weird
me complimenting anyone. It depends on how you he does.
He doesn't like because there'll be times we're watching the
Bachelorette and somebody will say like, oh, that guy is sexy,
and I should be like, I know he is sexy,
and it's like you're not allowed to say sexy about

(42:34):
any other man. Sometimes I feel like I've just like
slipped out things like when we're with our like you know,
bachelor friends, like I think I've said to like Ben
and and like you look great, it looks so good,
you look so good today, looks awesome, your hair looks nice.
And I can see she doesn't say your hair looks nice.
You always you always like compliment their looks or how
good looking they are. And it's like, alright, ash settled back.

(42:58):
You like get a compliment thing, compliments to a certain extent,
I think every person, a lot of people feel the
way I do. Now we're in a relationship and you're like,
all right, sudden, you know, take it back a little bit.
But I feel like, actually, is though you kind of
compliment everyone in general. Right Well, I think Ashley and
I have actually talked about this. We both at that

(43:19):
we both make people feel good, but really telling them
about like what we find very apeeling about that. But
I think Ashley as God used to call me a
flurgent on the show Alerty Virgin. That was what the producers.
You're very flirty and you're also it's gonna sound I
hope this doesn't sound bad. You're kind of a fan girl. Yeah,

(43:41):
that's not so bad at all. But when being a fan,
but when you see someone who you view as you know,
very good looking boy band or whatever, you know your
type is you and you end up fan girling over
them and it's not like my role as host, I know,

(44:02):
but I remember it caused it. I'm not even gonna lie.
It caused issues in our relationship. Early on. There was
a couple of moments where he was like, I got
you look at him and it's like, I know, it's
I know, nothing would ever happen. It's not it's not
that I think that you would cheat on me or
anything like that. It's more imagine if I looked at
a woman the way you look at some guys. See
I argued this with Jared. I think when guys look

(44:24):
at girls and like they like think about their appearance.
When guys talk about a girl's appearance, it's more like,
Oh she's hot, I'd like to bang her. With girls
it's like, oh he's hot, I want to look at him.
I agree, I totally it's not We're not as sexually
oriented when it comes to like visuals. We need like

(44:47):
a lot more to be like sexually attractive. So if
I looked at a girl the way that you look
at some guys, and I know that it's not any like.
I know you love me and you find me very attractive.
I tell you that you're the hottest person every single day.
I know, and you're so supportive and so um you
hype me up all the time, and I love you

(45:07):
about that. But if I looked at girls the way
sometimes you look at guys, just in terms of that
that awe you, you would you would, you would kill me.
I do think it's a double standard, though, because girls
do that all the time, Like actors, musicians, girls who
are married and so happily married can just go off

(45:30):
about like how much they have like a crush or
like their fan girling over somebody. But it's a double standard.
But I think there is a certain innocence to our
crushes that guys don't happen. It does feel different. It
totally is a double standard, Like it totally is, but
there's something different about it. There really is. There really is.

(45:52):
It's two against one right standards, though, this is his
biggest thing in life, double standards in any uh, acid
of life, whether it's you know, towards women or towards men.
I'm not saying what I do is right, but I
know that what I do is very innocent. Oh, I
know it is too. It's just more of of course,
you know, as as any person, if you saw your

(46:14):
significant other kind of like in awe of somebody else's looks,
you would be like, wow, this feels like cracky and
feel like it can't feel good. Yeah, and it's not
anything intentional. Also, yesterday we were watching Once upon a
Time in Hollywood. I was drooling over Margaret Robbie than Leo.
Like I was like, oh my god, her face, her face,
her face totally. But I do that with guys all

(46:34):
the time. Yeah, Like I drool over Tom Brady. But
it's not just the drool over guys more than girls though,
I know, actually, you know, it's really funny. This is
kind of a small story so I'm a big Rob
Thomas fan. We were, we've become friendly. Long story, we
were hanging out with him before his last concert in

(46:55):
Boston and he he looked at Ashley and me and
he's like, you know, the more I get to know Jared,
the more I realized that all his like crushes are guys.
And then he was like, but he's like, but he's like,
but I totally get that because when I think about it,
all my crushes are guys too, because a guy, it's like,

(47:16):
you know, obviously something like Margot Robbie is stunning and beautiful,
but if you're asking, like who would I rather meet
Margot Robbie or Tom Brady or even like Margot Robbie
or leon Nodo DiCaprio, it's not even a question. I
want to meet Leo every day of the week. And
you know, and I don't know. That's just like my

(47:36):
way of thinking because I'm like, I think it's also
like because I want to be like that. Yeah, you
want to be like that, you know, and you already
have your girl, so like, what's the point. That's what
we're also saying to Rob Thomas. We're one our hall passes.
We can't have all passes because they're too attainable, which
is understood too attainable, too attainable, like we could just
casually run into them on the street, or like we're

(47:59):
one to re of separation from them, you know what
I mean. It's like not even funny anymore, because she
told me who's your hall pass? Again? I think Joe
Jonas is my number one hall pass Milo. So every
girl in the world fund raising their hands about Joe
and Milo. I obviously have Joe, Milo and Jared not

(48:21):
to mention that I just saw a trailer for a
dog movie that's coming out starring Milo was good and
if there wasn't just enough women in the world that
will go see that movie. Um, but it's it's interesting
because like that could have we know someone who knows him,

(48:41):
you know, and it's like, no, that that could we
could easily just meet him and then a should be like, well,
that's my hall pass, you said it said. So then
when this when we start having this hall pass conversation,
which originated like a year ago when we first got engaged,
I was like, let's not use the hardword hall pass.
That would infer Yeah, that we wanted to like, bang

(49:04):
for sure. That's not like a like I have a
celebrity crush. I'm like, these are my celebrity crushes that
they're not hall passes. But I just say that with Leo,
I think you'd almost want me to get with Leo.
I see if people missing true the other time, because
when I talk about like someone like Brady, they're like, oh,
you would, you would totally make out Brady, And it's

(49:26):
like you personally you know me, you know, because they're like, oh,
you love him. It's like one there's different types of love,
you know. The way I love my parents is not
the same way I love my Ashley way as I
loved Tom Brady. Yes, I agree, um, but it's so
I forget where I was going with this. You know,
we're going with all of it. I don't know, wouldn't no, not,

(49:48):
there's anything wrong with that, the opportunity he should make
out with I would like to yeah, you know, okay, uh,
like I said that there's anything wrong with that. People
want to make out Tom Brady. I totally get it.
It's just not my preference. I want to grab a
beer with Brady, even though he doesn't drink beer. I
don't think because he's you know, health, he does. I
think he does. He chucked the beer Murmber that time,

(50:09):
like somebody's into the story. It was not Stephen Colbert. Okay,
and where you did the He chugged the beer in
like half a second. Anyway, Wow, we really off topic, Heather,
who are your celebrity crushes? We can arrange your next kiss.
Since these are all like one degree of separations, we
can try to arrange this. That's such a big question.

(50:32):
So much there's nobody that comes to mind, like even
just like a few names that you're like, oh, that person,
this person, like since like forever, like since Cinderella story,
Like Chad Michael Murray is a fantastic better than Chad
Michael Murray. Isn't there somebody Hill? He doesn't look that
much like they're both very attractive men. But I don't
think John Paul Jones looks too much. Like she's saying, no,

(50:56):
you have got to watch Injury Hill. Oh my gosh,
you would actually like and I cannot will watching it
that that Chad Michael Murray was the hottest person in
the entire world. I think so. I really enjoyed checkle
Chackle Chad Michael Murray in House of Wax. No, but yeah,
of course you haven't. Obviously, Paris Hilton's in there, Parris Hillen,

(51:19):
there's a couple of people. I can't remember. What else
do I know Chad Michael Murray from because I know
he's from Cinderella Story, but he's Freaky Friday. Freaky Friday. Yeah,
that's where I know him from. Jam is a great
celebrity crush. He's just like, yeah, he's a good one,
all right, So he's married. He's married. Take a single

(51:42):
crash and we'll have our emailers call in with connections.
But really, Amy is just connected to everyone saying it.
I should have come up with this song before. Are
you like a nineties heart throb girl? Are you kind
of like three old? Holy crap, I'm old. She's like
almost a decade younger than us. Who's all right? What

(52:04):
about Justin Timberlake? I like Justin Timberlake, but he wasn't
like my ultimate Like when I was a sophomore in
high school, I kissed Harry Styles on the cheek and
it was the best day in my entire life. So
you should say that's yeah, I met him. I stalked

(52:26):
him to a golf course, like I heard my friend
was golfing and I heard he was there, and I
literally like we had a math final the next day,
and I was like, I do not care. I stalked
into the golf course, got the picture, kissed him on
the cheeks, my friend. I think it's the same in
my life, like literally still to this day, like I
will like the feeling of oh yeah, it was great

(52:48):
and he was right super nice. Well he was like
trying to run away from everyone, but like I found him,
Like I was like, I was going, I found him.
No one else call a picture except me and my
friend and we just like stalked into a scar. That's amazing.
It was an amazing How do you feel about his
casting as Prince Eric. It's not officially. I don't think

(53:09):
Lauren called me like shrinking that it was. That's here too. Yeah,
I heard about it officially yet because I went I
looked it up when Lauren called, and I don't think
it's officially had great. He was great park If you
guys saw that, I didn't see it. Yeah, he can act.
I think that was his name. Did a great job

(53:30):
as Elton John in rocket Man. But still yeah, but
I still think Harry could have really killed that role choke. Okay, well,
we are going on and on and on. Thank you
so much for joining us than for that was great.
Thanks you, Thanks you guys. Thanks for I know you

(53:54):
guys are probably missing Ben very much. You're like, Wow,
Ashley really needs Ben to hold this podcast out. Well,
that's a busy man. He's been in Switzerland, Okay, He's
has these companies to run, and now he has something
else on this plate. It is The Bachelor Live on
Stage and he is the host of this live tour.
They're hitting up a bunch of cities, um all throughout

(54:16):
the country. It's gonna be kind of like a game
show and Ben is hosting the whole shebang. You can
go get more information at Bachelor Live on Stage dot com.
Four Weddings and a Funeral is a new Hulu original
series focusing on the lives of four college friends and
their different relationship and career crisis. One of the main characters, Craig,

(54:38):
has a girlfriend named Zara, who is an outsider to
the college friend group. Actually, you've ever been an outsider?
I feel like you've always been an outsider. What do
you mean? What do you mean? Because I always like
embraced myself fullheartedly. I don't think. I don't think. I
don't remember stories of you having Really I don't have
a friend high school group. I have, well, an outsider Jared.

(55:02):
I it's called somebody who had a lot of friends
and different groups. I never had like a core group.
Now I know. It was really sad, and I think
that's why I love the Bachelor family so much, because
it's like my first group of friends. We can all
hang together and like we all relate to each other
and we all get along. Because other than that, I've
always just had like my friend here, my friend here,
my friend here, my friend here, and my friend here.
I think you can probably relate to this coming from

(55:23):
the Bachelor, just like I was. I guess have you
ever had do you ever disliked a friend's friend? Friends? Friends?
Like you're close with a friend and you're like, I
love you, but then they always bring another friend around
that you have to hang out with because they're friends,
but you don't like them. Gonna be honest, because nobody's
sticking out. I'm going to say, now, no, even in

(55:44):
the Bachelor world, I feel like, that's a given the
bachelor world, I like almost everyone. Well, that's very you're
a very sweet person. Now you can catch all the
drama and Four Weddings and a Funeral, a new rom
com series produced by Mindy Kaling, premiering Live thirty one
only on Hulu. Okay, guys, we are joined by Crystal,

(56:08):
who's become really like a regular on this podcast, like
she's been on maybe three of the past six episodes.
I feel like, but I have a great question that
I want to concentrate on with our segment with Grissel,
because she just got married, and because we're about to
get married, and because this has been something that Jared

(56:29):
and I have bickered about when going to other people's weddings.
A question, and we asked the Instagram audience this a
couple of months ago. Do how much do you give
a couple? How much do you give a couple of
your giving money, so so you're like, you're giving money
at a wedding as a gift. How much do you

(56:50):
give person person to per couple? Do you even do
it by per per person? I'm so confused by this
because we went to a wedding a couple of months ago,
not yours, but somebody else's wedding. We went to, well
just quite beautiful. But we went to another wedding before that,
a couple of months ago, and I was like, oh,
we should give this amount. Actually was like are you
saying it? Was like, Jared, how cheap are you? That's
so embarrassing? And I was like, what are you talking

(57:12):
about a little more than that? I say that it
should be too, about two hundred a couple and about
a hundred dollars per individual. You know. I think it's
so interesting because when you when you buy gifts, you're
you're buying the gifts, and I would spend probably at
least a couple hundred dollars individually. Um, when it's money,

(57:36):
it's so different because it's such a different category, isn't it?
And I actually haven't I are we gonna figure out
how much money I'm giving to you at your wedding.
We don't want anything. This is very this isn't this
is perfect. Don't give anything perfect. I'm being honest because
so many of our guests actually gets mad at me
every time I say this, But I really don't want

(57:58):
that many gifts, just because I know asked, was gonna
slap me, but I feel bad for everybody who has
to pay money to fly out, get a hotel. It's
not cheap, and so the gift is kind of secondary
the most important things we want people there, Yeah, but
it is. It is nice to give. And I think
that Chris and I asked for We didn't really ask

(58:18):
for um a lot of presents. We asked for money
towards like our honey, little Honey fun. And I really
enjoyed that because we actually got to create experiences. And
I know, like when it comes to money, I think
that it's interesting, but I think minimum a hundred dollars
a person. Yeah, I think so too. And it seemed
like Instagram was I said with Instagram the Instagram I

(58:40):
said around a hundred or around two hundred, and most
people said around two hundred. Jared expected he thought like
the norm was like less than seventy five. You thought
it was around seventy five. Well, I never I never
even quantified it as per person. I was just like,
here's money for the couple. I never was like, oh,

(59:03):
I gotta spend at least seventy bucks per personal jaredy. Yes,
they at their tables, their plates that they like your
your dinner cost them at least fifty dollars usually, I know,
So it's so crazy. Like um years ago, when I
first started going to weddings and have like my friends
that started getting married, I remember sitting down with her
and my friend Ashley and going over She's like, yeah,

(59:24):
it's like a hundred and fift dollars ahead, and I
was like, wait, what what And she's like and was
complaining about like people not r s v P or
people wanting to bring plus the ones that were like
in serious relationships. And I never seen it from that
bridal perspective before, but I was like, oh my gosh,
there's so much, so much that goes into having guests there.

(59:47):
So y'all rs v P to the way shop according
to what the registry of what the Brennan grum we're
asking for. And I would say, I personally like doing gifts,
even if it's just like experiences, so like, but you
can probably expect from me as like a little note

(01:00:09):
that says what this money will be, because it's like
an experience and I like having like that little quantifiable contribution. No,
I liked your registry because it was. It was like
money for the honeymoon, money for this, and it was
like airline uber food out of this kind of restaurant.
I thought that was pretty thoughtful and pretty cool. What

(01:00:29):
are you guys doing? We have a crame Barrel registry,
and then we also have like a honeymoon or we
have like a house fund. We're calling it our house
fund because we always spend so much time together watching
h G t V and dreaming about our ideal house,
dreaming that I feel like everything we do is like, Okay,
this is going to go to our house one day. Yeah.

(01:00:50):
I mean every kind of like penny we save, it's like,
all right, this is going. Where is that house going
to be? That's a great question. In Rhode Island somewhere
probably just l A. It's so expensive. Dollar doesn't go far.
You don't get your you know, the bank for the
book out here, and it sucks. It's just like why
would I pay for a house over here? It's like, yeah,

(01:01:13):
here's a two thousand square foot house, two bedrooms, one
and a half path, two million dollars and it's like
what I know? I was looking. I was my first
team out of California in two thousand twelve. I was
looking on zello just for fun. I get afford anything
because I was like a server. But I saw in

(01:01:34):
studio city four hundred and fifty square feet foot studio
nine hundred dollars, and I was like, I'm coming from
like Montana, Idaho, And I was like, is this what
it is out here? You just turned right back around
back of the hound coort. How long do you work
in the hospitality industry for? I worked in food and

(01:01:55):
beverage for twelve years high five. Yeah, I'm a little
closer to thirteen. I worked in it for. My first
job was fifteen bussing at Cellos Cellos and Warwick, Rhode
Island was a bussing now it was like a hometown,
like family five h Yeah. We went to Cellos on

(01:02:17):
the water, different water. Yeah, it was different one. But anyway,
I've worked for god eleven eleven twelve years in the hospital.
But I know you treat everybody so well, and you're
so personalble with everybody, and you can tell that you
have a background working with people. And I've always said
everybody it should be a college course to work in

(01:02:38):
the food industry or any type of hospitality hotel, because
dealing with people teaches you how to deal with people,
how to just how to be a nice person, you know,
to look at somebody in the eyes, to respond to somebody,
I think, even just to speak respectfully, even to just
I know, as a server, there are many many moments

(01:02:59):
where I just felt so degraded taking someone's order and
I'm like, I'm trying to serve your family, lady, like
your kids are screaming, I'm here like helping out. I
was bartending to after the show at times, and it
was the worst feeling ever because so many times people
would come in and they would be like, oh my god,
you're Jared from The Bachelor. What the hell? Like they'd

(01:03:20):
be like, oh my god, I'm so excited to meet you,
because if you're on TV, they immediately assume that you
have fame and fortune. And it was just sometimes really
difficult because then I'd be like, no, I'm bartending here,
like can I get something to drink? And it was
just like this weird, surreal moment I think for them
because they were like, oh my god. I thought, like,
what are you doing here? You were on TV, and

(01:03:41):
it's like that's not how reality TV. Works, you know,
and so yeah whenever, uh, sometimes I remember not to
be weird. I would get numbers all the time. It
was just like that. But when he was working in
l A, when we first like started dating, and he
was bar attending because he really just wanted to bartend.

(01:04:03):
I wanted to work. Yeah, he wanted to work to
go and like to have a structure. Tuesday. I used
to like pick him up and I'd be like, did
you get any Never did anybody hit on you? I
love my guy getting hit on my I like knowing
that I have something that other people want. But you
didn't have him at that No, I did know. Yeah,

(01:04:26):
Oh so when did you quit bartending? No, like he
came back to it for a while. I stopped in
like May. I think mayor mayor June. Probably June last year. Yeah,
just about a year ago. But it just everything kind
of picked up and everything was so busy and it
was just impossible. It's like, oh, I can work next
Sunday and next Tuesday, and it was you know, can

(01:04:47):
I ask how did it feel to put in your resignation? Oh,
I've quit a few jobs. Uh it's always the worst.
I've gotten better at it. As I've done it more often,
and then you realize that it's not I think personal.
It's just I've never a quit a job because I've
hated the job, you know, I've always quit because there
was either a better opportunity or I had to leave
or something along those lines. So I don't think I've

(01:05:09):
ever really had that experience of be like, I hate
this place, I'm quitting. It's always been I have a
better opportunity or I just can't fit it in my schedule.
And that's what happened with so for me, mom was different.
My first job was actually as a dishwasher at a
truck stop, and I used to walk two miles each way,

(01:05:34):
back when chocolate used to cossa nickel. I know, I walk.
I walked two miles to school. You kids, you kids
are so ungrateful and well. And then at one point
the school bus would like drop me off in school
in high school, like my freshman year, you know, I
was hustling. That I grew u with a single mom

(01:05:54):
who really couldn't ever ever provide. I remember on the
batch I talked about in third grade, I bought myself
a further my bed because mine had holes. My mom
like wouldn't couldn't afford it. And as I said about
my Birthday money and my Christmas money, and while my
ceilings are out buying candy a bot like it's a
beautiful comforter with like floral on it, which is now
all like hideous, But I was like so proud. I've

(01:06:16):
always had this like ethic to just really know that
it's going to be me out there, like me like
providing for myself. And I really cared that ethic throughout,
you know, my entire life because of that. So when
I quit bartending, I remember I would stand there and
I would be bartending like my last year, and I
just I would like pull out the little receipt and

(01:06:37):
like at that extra paper, and I would pull out
a little customer pad and started writing down like my
mission statement of like my job, my career, like my
dreams and what I was going to do and all
the steps I was going to take, and I would
just be like so connected with it and know that
like when I was there, granted, I was so grateful
to be working, to be making money, and I really
enjoyed um, bartending was really really fun. But I knew

(01:07:00):
that I wasn't living my potential and so pardon me
was just really like held back and feelings just you know,
like a flower that just couldn't blossom as long as
they stayed safe. And so when I quit um also
my mom barked for twenty five years and I got
to see her just never really go after her dreams
and it was really hard to see that. So that

(01:07:21):
was a huge fear for me, was that I would
never amount to anything else. I would only be that
I would only play it safe in the world and
my dreams would go like uncovered, like or it's still covered.
And so for me to quit, it was this huge,
huge moment for me, and Gat I like quit too,
go make venimum wage as a fitness instructor. But for me,

(01:07:42):
it was it wasn't the job. It was just that
the expression of the soul and the work I was
doing and contributing out to the world. Yeah, going after
what you want. I'm going to tell a quick story
and Ashley's definitely gonna hate me for this, and I apologize. Well,
there's a great story that I've heard that I repeated
actually many times, that Jim care he talks about and
he talks about his father, He says, my father was

(01:08:03):
the funniest guy, funnier than me. Could have been a
great comedian, but he was scared because that seemed out
of possibility, and so he took a safe job as
an accountant. And when Jim Carey was thirteen years old,
his father got fired from that job and they had
to do whatever they had to do to survive, and
he learned a lot of great lessons, not the least
of which was that you can fail at what you

(01:08:25):
don't want to do, so you might as well go
after what you love. And that's a line that's always
stuck with me. And it's something that I preach and
I don't practice. Don't practice. It's it's you know because
it is hard because you do have this idea of
taking these safe jobs because it looks like it's, you
know it, there's stability there and security there, um, but

(01:08:48):
there really isn't. There's no such thing as a safe job.
And um, so I I give you a lot of
credit for kind of being able to get out of
your own way and go after the things you want,
because especially coming from your background, and I think I
can relate a little bit. You see a lot of
your friends, there are so much potential and there's and
there's so many things that they want to do, and

(01:09:09):
then all of a sudden, fifteen years go by and
they're still bartending. And there's nothing wrong with that at all.
I was a lifelong bartender, but I think that there's
a lot of people that wish they could do more
and just all of a sudden they fall into this
comfort zone and then years go by and it's like,
holy crap. I mean, it's scary to take chances. It's
really scary. And I think that I feel so grateful

(01:09:30):
for going on the show The Bachelor, because I mean,
for everyone that we've met in our Bachelor family, I
mean like we all just said yes to a crazy
opportunity that was so out of the norm, and we
just went into it. I mean like surrendered into it.
And it's taken us on this river of opportunities and
either you pull over because it's too tumultuous for you

(01:09:51):
to handle, or you can just continue to write it
and then you learn the attitude that you want when
you're on the river, Like is it hard, is it,
you know, uncomfortable, or is it like an exciting adventure?
And you can't wait to see what's around the bent totally.
And I remember before we went on the show. I'm sorry,
now I'm on a tangent. I'm sorry. Actually we're rapping, Okay,

(01:10:12):
I'm not. I love the conversation. I just want to
say one last thing because it's along the same lines
that you were talking about when deciding going on the
show or not. And I remember having a moment to
myself thinking why would I not go on the show,
And it was because I was scared. I was scared
of what people would think of me. And it brought
me back to another quote, which was, um, people make

(01:10:34):
decisions based out of fear all the time, and they
disguised it as practicality. And I knew that if I
didn't do the show, it was because I was making excuses,
and it was really because I was scared. And so
I ended up going on the show and it worked
out well because now I'm engaged. Your only real real
risk in life, that's the tragic risk all the time.

(01:10:55):
I don't take them all, but I take some risk.
Was the last risk you took? I mean, I'm in
l a okay, that's a fair We're together He's going
to be a big risk. That's awesome. Um, well, I

(01:11:17):
want to take this opportunity to just call out to
make Jared feel very awkward. I he his dream is
to work in movies and this is like his next
big This is like a leap that he would love
to take, but has no idea how to get into
where this. So I want to know if any of
our listeners want to email Ben and Ashley at iHeart

(01:11:40):
media dot com and just let us know if there's
any opportunities at any movie studios or anything where Jared
ind involved himself further in the movie industry. And he's
looking at me with a total judgment right now. But no,
we all have the three of us have this conversation
the other night, and we were talking about Jared living
on his dreams and owning it and being unapologetic about it.

(01:12:02):
Tell us, right here, right now, your dream own it.
I want to go home. Tell us you gotta go
out there, you're putting it out there. I don't know,
I don't know. I'm sure I agree to produced, direct,

(01:12:25):
act any of that. Yeah. I just loved films. I
love the idea of creating a story from scratch. And
creating a world and characters and uh and really telling
a compelling story. And so that's why I love movies
and I love the There's just it's the uh, the
creative side of it that really uh gets me. Anyway,
we don't have to talk about this. We're talking about

(01:12:47):
four weddings in a funeral. That's what we're talking If
you guys have any jobs out there, good lord, it's
Ben and Ashley at iHeartMedia dot com. Anyway, way to
wrap it, um, I also just wanted to throw in
there some things that I felt about gifts for weddings.
I think it also has to do with how far
and how much you travel to go to the wedding.

(01:13:09):
I think it has to do with how close you
are to the couple. Yeah, there's all different factors in there.
Like Jared and I went to this wedding in Nashville.
We spent so much money to get there. Well you know,
and yours. It's a nice friend of yours, but like
we definitely wouldn't have We didn't give as much as
we normally would have because it was such an expense.
I think, yeah, of course, and everybody has a factor then,

(01:13:31):
which is why I want people to factor in when
they come to our wedding. Yeah, totally, no, no no, no,
I feel the exact same way for people who are
coming in from like flights, coming in from like flights. Yes,
So if you're coming in for one of our flights
or you're just gonna watch Four Weddings in the Funeral
At Home on Your Couch is the new Hulu original

(01:13:53):
series that focuses on the lives of four college friends
and their different relationship and career crises. In the premier,
the friends gather for a wedding that is filled with
drama and surprises. Maya messes up at Ainslie's wedding. Why
do you want to expected? Things always happen at weddings.
There's always something our wedding planners like, all these horrible
things are going to happen, and you're not even going

(01:14:14):
to know about them because I'm going to take care
of it completely, and then I'll tell you the next
day what happened. Yeah, do you still want to you
he wants to kill me for but no? Continue? All right, Well,
I will make sure to inform you guys of the
all the crazies that happened behind the scenes. At our wedding.

(01:14:35):
But for right now, you can catch all the drama
in Four Weddings and a Funeral, a new rom com
series produced by Mindy Kaling, premiering July thirty one, only
on Hulu. Alright, guys, well, thank you for joining me
for this extended podcast, a very very long one that
I thought was going to be a short beat. But

(01:14:57):
it was so good because everybody loves to talking about
weddings so much. Thanks to my co host, to my
future husband of course, my almost husband down the final
cultry life is the best. You're going to love it.
And for people who say it doesn't feel any different,

(01:15:17):
they're wrong. It feels like it feels so freaking awesome.
Thanks Crystal. Alright, guys, thank you so much again for
feedback on anything we talked about today. Please email Benn
and Ashley at I heart media dot com. And until
next time, I've been Ashley, I've been Jared, and I've

(01:15:40):
been Crystal Ulu. Follow the Benn and Ashley I Almost
Famous podcast on I heart Radio or subscribe wherever you
listen to podcasts.