The Woody Show May 12th 2023 Podcast

Friday Fail Stories, The Duiq, Nerdin out, Ravey's Mom & More!

Episode Transcript

(00:02):
Due to the griffin nature of thisprogram, listener discretion is advised. The
Woody Shows, the Woody Show Insensitivitytraining are gone. In England. Con

(00:37):
class is now in session. Well, good morning everybody. Yeah, any
water today. It's May the twelfth, twenty twenty three. We've made it.
It's the end of another week.It is Friday morning. Boy a

(01:00):
boy nami I do yeah, dude, end of the week. Let's get
through it as quickly as we can. Thank you for being here. Monday.
It was Woody. That is Rabia. There's a great gory. We
got our Friday version of Menace.What is up? Social media director SeaBASS,
there's a there's a Friday version ofSea Bass. You got Sammy,

(01:23):
we got at moret Caroline, there'sMorgan Vanus here. It is Friday.
Oh yeah, it's officially Friday.Now we are the Woody Show. Coming
up for you on the show thismorning. Of course, the Friday Fail
Stories dumb Ass Contest will be thed U i Q give a chance to
win something there. Raby's got anerd now before the hours up and we're

(01:46):
gonna have the redneck news story theweek and need your votes. Figure out
who's moving on into the playoff round? That and more this Friday morning here
on the Woody Show, phones areopen at eight seven seven forty four.
Woody hit us up with the textover to two two nine eight seven,
which is also where you're sending yourFriday check ins. Tell Elsa who you
are, where around town? You'relistening to the woods Show. Maybe some

(02:06):
exciting weekend plan you can share withus or anyone anything you like to vis
mentioned when we get to your Fridaycheck in, text on over to two
nine eight seven. We were talkingon yesterday's show about that, uh,
that couple that owns that property whereit's how many acres, it's like nine
five acres and they're gonna give them, no fifty it was it fifty eight,

(02:30):
I forget what it was. Itwas five. They were gone,
yeah, fifty million dollars for fiveacres in Australia. Yeah, in Australia.
And they turned it down right,And so the neighborhood looks ridiculous,
and I mean it's just this onepiece of land with this one house on
its surrounded by just densely populated yeah, a subdivision, yeah whatever, Yeah,

(02:53):
exactly because it's a big long drivinggo on right for the front of
the house. Ye. Anyway,as we were talking about this and some
of the feedback we got because weall said, oh my god, I
would absolutely take property. Yeah,I would take the five million. Yea
true, you know, And thatwas ten years ago. It was the
five million dollars offer. And thenhere it is ten years later, fifty

(03:14):
million. They're still saying, no, that's just being dumb, right,
that's being dumb. But the questioncame up, and uh, we asked
the room and I already got oneanswer from from Greg. Fifty million dollars
to give up your dog, notto kill your dog, to give up
your dog. And Greg said no, I said probably not. Yeah,

(03:36):
I'm not buying it anything. Yes, I don't think. I don't trust
No, I'm definitely not saying hellyes, I would have the worst anxiety,
the worst guilt to think that forthe rest of my dog's life,
it's going to think, what haveI done wrong? You abandoned me?
Okay, Well, fifty thousand dollarswill take care of a lot of therapy.
To fifty million dollars and you couldadopt fifty new dogs. Yeah,

(04:00):
all of it. Yeah, butthey're not my dogs. That money got
transferred to your bank account, you'dbe on your first t you'd be fine,
racked with guilt. For I wouldlook at the dome you understand right,
get it, and she's whimpering andcrying. I mean she wouldn't understand,
but she wouldn't know. I'd lookin her eyes and go, Cassie,

(04:23):
baby, you understand right. She'dsay, you're my best friend.
Fifty million dollars, Sammy, absolutelynot. I'm not lying. It's not
a lie, old face. Firstoff, again, if you were not
racked with guilt, you would takethat. You know what you haven't done.
You haven't rescued fifty dogs this yearWith that money, you could,

(04:44):
yeah, that you could take themfrom kill shelters too. So there are
fifty dogs this year who are dyingbecause you're being selfish and being a bitch.
Both you guys and I believe Sammy. You're not killing You're not skinning
your new dollar. Okay, Ithought we were killing them. The dog
when it seems like, oh,it's a nice place with food, Okay,
cool, I'm good. No,No, I mean I've had her

(05:05):
for ten years. Okay, Soyet another ten, another ten. Yeah,
she's small. I would not beable to do what. I would
feel so guilty forever. Like Gregsaid, for abandoning her for fifty million
dollars, you sold her. Yeah, he sold her to somebody that has
her fifty million dollars. Apparently didn'tbuy your dog. You didn't leave her

(05:27):
on the side of the road.Price on love. She had went price
on love. She went to anotherfamily, another person. No, where's
board? Bring board in? Sammywas starving to death and desperate. Maybe
all right, scenarios dumb, Allright, menace, let's get her natal.
Fifty million dollars for both your dogs, both of them. Yeah,

(05:48):
he only likes waters chimney. HNo, I love million dollars. Check
this out. It wouldn't be instant, yes, but yeah, probably because
my dogs they're perfectly fine being withother people. Yeah whatever, I could
leave. Yeah, I know,like the second I leave, they would

(06:12):
forget about me. I'll be fine, don't forget about them. Yeah,
as again, this is a scenariowhere they go into another home. So
I'm perfectly fine with it, allright, hold on, hold on high
board board can't wait to jump?Yeah boord? Okay, So I mean
I know you love your pets andeverything. Oh yeah right, yeah,
fifty million dollars. I'd do alot for fifty million dollars. Pretty much

(06:36):
all of you would be sold tocare what foreign country that would rip your
kidneys out? Don't care? Sorry, I like you guys, but no,
my pets. No. For fiftymillion dollars, I would literally send
Sea Bass to a Mexican quartel.And I believe that we're just talking about

(06:57):
like again, not to a killshelter, not to the side of the
older, to another favorite case snakesor not understanding. Yeah, no,
I'm just not believing believe anybody thatsays no, So raybe I'm just assuming
now based on what you said.Yeah, by cats, okay, butts
are different, yes, and I'mnot to people who love them. That's
right, thank you. I'm notgoing to say that pets are like children,

(07:19):
but would you sell your daughter?My daughter? We're talking about a
million dollars, I'm getting about fiftymillion dollars million. I'm not going to
use this analogy, but here's theexact analogy because I don't have kids,
so like, this is the lovethat I know. But your your your
dog is not a kid. It'snot a human being. Guess what else

(07:41):
is legal to do? Drop offyour dog at a shelter for to die,
that's not legal with a child,right exactly. However, if I'm
if I'm going out for the night, I just can't, like put my
daughter in a kennel. I meanyou could. I mean for fifty million
dollars a kid, I'm selling thatkid, right bro? Hell yeah bro?
So you say that about cats,they're not. That's different cats.

(08:01):
What about the kinds of pets thatthat the board has. I understand his
connection to them, Yeah, butyou can't understand people. You don't understand
my connection to my cat because Ididn't say that teasing. Oh my god,
Yeah, Like I just don't.It's simple with animals because they give
you, like an unconditional amount oflove and they don't do anything they'll ever
disappoint you, as opposed to childrenor other family members or people. That's

(08:24):
what's so easy to sell people.I would love to put that out to
our listeners. If if they kidlike legally sell their kids for fifteen million
bucks, would you do it?I think we would. Yeah, let's
get an eccentric billionaire to make theactual offer to Sammy and see if she's
being honest. I believe so.And this is this is the one wrinkle

(08:46):
I thought of. Now, ifyou're you know, Mark Zuckerberger, Elon
Musk, and you really love yourdog and somebody offers you fifty million dollars,
you probably don't care as much andyou're like, you know what,
I'm keeping the dogs. Yeah exactly, but you know any of us,
I mean, ninety nine point ninepercent of people fifty million, Yeah,

(09:07):
not even five millions, fifty million, fifty million. I know. That's
why I can't understand, like whyanybody would even hesitate. Because love,
That's what I'm trying to explain,because love's the next one you'll you'll and
you can love the next fIF youbuy again. By not taking the fifty
million dollars, you're doing other petsto death. Also true, that's right
back giving them, you're killing themessentially. I also have a hard time

(09:30):
believing like, oh, well,you know, I would push the dog
out of the way and jump infront of the truck mar than train myself
like na dog greg No pun intendedgreat, Yeah, greg Is said in
the past would always around trains,so well, and you're also getting offers
of fifty million dollars to get ridof your head. It's all hypothetical.
Yeah, oh is it? Yeah? I see Greg, Wait, it's

(09:52):
a trade stationed out be like,I wonder what the docks docks I'm saying.
But if it came down to that, you would jump in front of
a train to save the dog?I would try, yes, Sammy,
because that's a guarantee that you willget killed by the train if you attempt
to save your dog. Sammy,would I would I jump in the dog
is on the tracks. You're like, oh my god, and you don't

(10:13):
know. Honestly, I think instinctuallyI would just do it. Like I
wouldn't have time to think it throughenough. I would have to go out.
Let's assume for the second you hada moment to think it through and
there's a chance of me making itback out with her, or that's say
let's say you don't know, Imight die, or let's say no,
the train's barreling down. I don'tknow she would do it. You wouldn't

(10:35):
do it because I mean she wouldthink about think about your your funeral,
right, I mean, there's alot of come into play. Your parents
would be so disappointed, idiot.Yeah, what a dumbassy I was expecting
to answer, like, no,I picked her up knowing that there was
no chance, and we die together. Scoop us up and shovel us into

(10:58):
a bucket that you don't know wherethe dog potentially dies, but fifty million
dollars where the dog lives within theirfamily and get that? All right?
So what would you do fifty milliondollars for your pet, whatever that pet
is, would you do it?Why does everybody hate money so much?
Yeah? Right, text over totwo two nine eight seven. Yeah,

(11:20):
these people should sell their stupid house, take the fifty million dollars they're attached
for, Like Sammy's attached to thisdog that's been alive for ten years.
Somebody had a theory. Maybe thesepeople have dead bodies buried in that acren.
Oh yeah, maybe, and theyjust cannot got to be something else,
maybe something right? Yeah, allright, hit us up with a
text over to two two ninety seven, will be right back. Hello,
I'm Chris. I wanted to toI want to make a shout out to

(11:50):
the Woody Show. I welcome back, every buddy. It is a Friday,
morning and moving right along. We'vegot Raby's Nerd Out Reports Lives in
the World of Nerds coming up foryou in just a moment. Also the
Woody Show Mail call some of yourfeedback that you left on our after hours
voicemail at eight seven seven forty fourWoody. A couple of the holidays for

(12:11):
today. It's maybe the twelfth.Today is National Nutty Fudge Day, Raved
nut Fudge, nutt Enjoy International NursesDay. Shout out to all the nurses
out there. We do have alot of people, so many work in
the medical profess believe it or notthat work in the medical I think you

(12:33):
almost have to have like share oursense of humor to have a job like
that. For sure. It's aNational Hospital Day. It is a National
Limerick Day. Limerick. Remind mewhat a limerick? I know, it's
like a poem, but like alimerick poem or yeah, like a rhyme?
Right almost, Well, wouldn't thatalso be like a pump? But
it's a structure, correct, ahumorous, frequently body verse of three long

(12:56):
and two short lines. Okay,y, yeah, it's me. It's
like the structure of why did everybodylaugh when I said Ryan, Yeah,
but it's born about that structure.Almost yeah, almost. It specifically is
yeah, today's National tampon Day,Yeah, celebrate tamps, tams, happy
tampon days, and today's National PlantHealth Day, plant health. And now,

(13:18):
I look, I'm not taking careof plants, but I know a
lot of people try and fail.I did see this cool thing. It
popped up on Instagram. It's thisapp that you scan like it has a
part like you have a plant thathas did you see it? It rules
like like a part of the leafis brown, you know, and everything.
Instead of cutting it or taking thatbranch off or whatever, you scan

(13:39):
it with this app. It tellsyou exactly how to bring it back to
health. It says like add sugarwater, right, and you add sugar
water the plant. Next thing youknow, it's like boom, Can this
app tell me how to get mycats to stop munching on them? No?
Nah? And then throwing it up? Yeah, I don't like what?
Yeah, what would you do withthat? Isn't there something you can
do with po get ready? Well, I mean it's a safe for them,

(14:03):
it's not poisonous. I obviously lookedthat up before I bought some plants,
but they'd like to get in thereand then they'd like to like,
are you really throwing up under thebed? Damn it does apple spray work
on cats? I know that's bigfor dogs. Yeah, I think your
cat was on the label apple spray? Apple spray? What is that?

(14:24):
Uh? It's just a I don'tknow, like a citrusy. Yeah.
That they all liked. They stoppedchooting on stuff, all right. Eight
seven seven forty four. It's eightseven seven forty four after hours voicemail.
We got one here. This issomebody who just found out some really bad
news. You guys hardy and therest of the getting. I need some

(14:46):
advice. My fiance is three yearsis cheating on me. Fund I seen
her phone. Shouldn't physically do it, but very intimate emotional stuff. She
said, sorry, but what shestill wants to be friends with the dude.
But it's like, damn, bro, what do you think we should
do? Man? I need someadvice? All right? Um, so

(15:07):
no physical cheating. It was theonly cared about that, but she still
wasn't dumber. Yeah, sure dumber. They're not married. And be glad
you're dodging a bullet dodge throw thegutter and get another. I'm all right,
Sammy high Fiday. I mean theydidn't do anything. She still wants

(15:30):
some attachment to that guy. You'rewhat he's playing obvious? No, Yeah,
well everybody's got no, everybody's gottheir different their different lines in the
sand. She's doing a slow rollout. They're rolling out on that dude.
Rust has been broken. Yeah,Well, if that was their agreement,
like, hey, no emotional youknow why you're engaged. Okay, when

(15:54):
we get married, let's agree notto like texts deep emotional attachments. Okay,
if there is sex, if thereis sexting, that's different, right,
But if like, like, howdo you define like if you're just
close friends like gravy, you've madethe argument that men and women can be
friends. Yeah, right, likea sexual But what does that That's what

(16:15):
I'm saying. What does it meanif there's no sex, what does that
mean? Like, give me anexample, like what would be intimate?
Well, first of all, hearthe term emotional cheating before, Like,
well, what exactly does that mean. You didn't say they weren't sexting.
I always said they didn't do anyYeah, they didn't, Well, they
didn't do nothing physical, right,That could very well be sexting. Now,

(16:36):
if there's naughty text messages going backand forth, then yes, obviously.
But if it's just like, oh, like you know, we're we're
friends and we have a trust betweeneach other and we can confide in each
other's sounds like, yeah, I'vewatched a TV show beef. When they
say no physical act can happen,guess what happens physical stuff? Yeah,

(16:56):
somebody texted over the other day.Would he is gotten really weird about where
he's drawing the lines in the sand? What do you mean like on this?
Yeah, you're like taking up forthis and that they can still get
married. Well, look, wehave another friend who the rule in their
relationship is he can like grab boobsand butts and everything else and someone else

(17:18):
on him or whatever and his lifeperson about as long as this person doesn't
grab their junk. But for me, that's a totally different scenario. For
me, this wouldn't be a dealbreaker. The way he's describing this would
not be a deal breaker. Itis if your wife was texting somebody else
all day all the time and tellingthem I miss you about their day that

(17:40):
they didn't tell you and I don'thave a conversation about it. If there
was not a physical relationship, Idon't put it under I think of the
it would be weird. But Iwouldn't put under the the umbrella of cheating.
That's all he said, cheating onme. My fiance is cheating on
me. Right? Have you saidanything that you wouldn't do in front of

(18:00):
your partner? She was hiding this. Yeah, he found it on her
phone. I'm snooping. He washurt by it. He asked what would
we do? And I said Idon't. I would make up and believe
being Oblivia's idiot, but the restof us, I wouldn't cheated. And
you're not married yet. And howlong you've been engaged? For? What?
Three years? He said? Allright, how long have you been

(18:21):
together? You get a day foreach year you've been together to feel bad
for yourself and feel sorry for yourself. When are you going to change that
rule? And then I'm not.And then you got to pick yourself up
and move on because if you know, if it's over, it's over.
There you go, that was odd, super odd? Yeah, yes,
yes, okay, I thought werejust talking in the Are we totally are

(18:41):
Yeah, but the bird and thisis n out with Ray Ray what you
learned about this Friday morning. Sothe Guardians are going to have their way
with the box office again this weekend, and it'll be interesting to see what
happens because recent Marvel movies have droppedlike a stone from weekend one's weekend two.

(19:06):
But the word of mouth on Guardiansis better than any MCU movie in
many years. I would loved it, so maybe people like you would go
again. Possibly I would like togo see. I mean, if I
have time this weekend, I'll go. You should definitely check it out.
So I think it's going to performbetter this weekend than recent MCU movies.
And it has to make its moneythis weekend because fast X Yeah comes out

(19:27):
on me nineteen Yeah, they getall the money. Then. Now,
we talked about this plan to combineDisney Plus and Hulu maybe ESPN Plus into
all one combined app by the endof the year. Well, this was
part of an earnings call that DisneyCEO Bob Eiger was having, and he
also revealed that they're going to becontent cutting on both Disney Plus and Hulu,

(19:49):
so you'll be paying more money forless content. Great. They spent
around thirty billion on contents in Disney'stwenty twenty two fiscal year, and so
Iger's looking for at least three billionin savings for twenty twenty three. But
of that thirty billion, thirty percentis devoted to sports rights alright, for

(20:11):
ESPN and ABC Sports. Disney saidthey're going to weed through the vast library
of content on Disney Plus and Hulu, remove what they call little watched titles
that are too costly to maintain dueto residuals, royalties, music licensing fees,
and other costs. Iger said,this is part of the maturation process
as we go into a business thatwe've never been in. So Warner Brothers

(20:34):
was the first to do this withslashing a lot of stuff on HBO Max,
and they kind of got roasted forit. So we'll see what happens
when Disney decides to do it too. Imagine your task was saving three billion,
Right, where do we start toluck? Disney, by the way,
release the first trailer for something Ididn't even know they were doing a

(20:55):
c fuel series to the full MontyWhat that move? And they came out
twenty five years ago? Okay,This is an eight part series and it
follows the same dudes were clamoring forthis. I don't think that they're stripping
anymore what they're I was like,wait, how much more can there be?
What is happening? It's debuts onJune fourteenth on Disney Plus. You've

(21:19):
got some premiere dates for some othershows. So, speaking of Hulu,
The Bear season two coming back onJune twenty second, and HBO announced that
The Righteous Gemstones will return four seasonthree. And that's happening on June eighteenth
on Rabian. For more nerd stuff, check out the Nerd Not podcast at
The Woody Show dot com. NerdAll right, thank you very much,

(21:41):
Trabels, you got a dun.You've got some more Friday. What do
you show for you next? Hangup? What do you sit in the
nineties? Chicken nuggets somewhere in thestudio? Can find it before they never
mind you found it? What doyou show? Will be right back road?
Wow? Shut up you go,I'm so cringe show. It's a

(22:10):
Friday morning? Right? What up? Drip all that we are the one
He's showing into another new hour ofinsensitivity training for a politically correct world.
It's made twelve, twenty twenty three. Going into a Mother's Day weekend,
just another father reminder and make sureyou at least get mom a card to
you know, do something nice forforget your mom. Yeah, are you

(22:33):
all set up? Yeah? I'mmaking a stop today to overnight the cards.
Not just regular overnight. It's aSaturday delivery, okay, which is
even more wow because I met yesterdayand then it's forgot only a billion dollars.
That's only a billion dollars card.The cards are a billion dollars because
they're super expecting these cards. Yeah, we're talking about card prices, talking

(22:55):
about inflation, right, it's likeabout Mother's Day for two weeks yep.
Well, Saturday overnight card. Yeah, and you know what, I bought
these cards over a week ago.That's what we did. Yeah. Now,
would you be frustrated if the deliverydoesn't come on time? Yeah?
So you would be upset? Okay, Well, I mean if you're paying

(23:17):
that cover price for a Saturday delivery, Yeah, of course, like you
wouldn't. Now if I took thechance and I had mailed them like on
a Tuesday or Wednesday, and thenhe'd go all the way across the country
or whatever and missed it by dayI'd be like, oh, well,
you know, should have overnighted it. I should have paid a billion dollars
for right. And the thing Irealized is that out of sight out of
mind for me, Well, youneed to start maybe visual. Yes,

(23:41):
if only you did this every yearand would learn from it. Now,
it's just I need I need avisual reminder with the X on his hands.
No, And the reason that theyweren't out invisible is because I have
the cards for my wife and youjust can't tell the difference. Right now.
You couldn't separate them. That's possible. They're locked there. I'll change
together. Well, they weren't abundle there. Now, I'm not arguing

(24:06):
with you. I'm R word,I'm legal, R word stupid. I
don't I don't know know, Yeah, I don't know what it is with
this stuff. Well, it's oneof those things where you're not doing it
because you don't want to correct,because you don't love my parents. My
intentions are great action. I don'teven think it's a mental block. It's
just you just always wait and wait, and then one day becomes two to

(24:29):
become three, and then you knowwhat it is. You know what it
is. You just have to doit. And this is a total fail.
I mean, you know, lastminute stuff. Um, it's just
I have I have the mental capacityfor what's happening tomorrow, and then that's
about it. Like my wife wantsto talk about two weeks from now,
and let's talk about that, andlet's let's plan it. I'm like,

(24:49):
what's tomorrow, what are we doingtomorrow? Let's get through that, you
know, and then if we're talkingabout a vacation or whatever, we need
to set some time aside and thenwe can plan on that. But and
just like in a regular week dayconversation, I'm like one or two days
in advance for everything, and that'son a daily thing. On these things
that pop up like a like aholiday or whatever, those really sneak up

(25:12):
on me. And I'm telling youit's dumb. I guess we've talked about
it for two weeks. Yeah Ihave. Yeah, I have a suggestion.
You're not gonna hear me out,but have a visual calendar in like
your garage or something that your wifewould just update for you because she has
access. I know, because allour significant others have access to our calendars.

(25:34):
You can just write it in therefor you. So you said that
you need a visual thing. There'sa calendar that would be in your garage
and when you're leaving for work everyday, you could like look up at
it. You know what I needto do. I need to set the
alert in the phone, like inthe calendar on the phone sometimes. I
mean you could set it up almostlike a snooze, you know. Huh

(25:56):
would you do it? The alertgoes off and then will you remember it?
Card? Would you actually do it? Um? Would you just be
like, oh, yeah, Igotta do that. I don't need to
do this until tomorrow, that's right. Yeah, I was still on you.
I'm totally with your right. Thephysical calendar right, stuff down and
then write all right, that wouldbe unsightly to have hang into my house.
I mean, come one garage andthen then I would never see it.

(26:21):
I don't. I'm sure you canfind a good looking one on Etsy
or something. Oh yeah, theyhave nice one. Yeah. She could
just ride it in there for you, yeah, or you could ride it
yourself, or you could ride steelers. Right, yeah, some manly calendar,
yes, calendar for men like chickswashing cars. Oh yes, yeah,

(26:42):
yeah, corvettes. I was Iwas thinking more of an unraceable thing.
But you want to go old school, that's right, man, Yeah,
like how mechanics had Yeah yeah yeah, and then all the beer holidays
on there and you just take goodquick each day, that's right, right,
and then just write on or sendmom's card. Look, guys,
I'm not sitting here defending myself.It's dumb. I have no defense.

(27:06):
I've got to be one of thedumbest people you've known. Seriously, I
don't because it's every year, You'reright, ten years, every year,
every year, every birthday, everywhatever it is. It's getting triple overnighted.
Yeah. But you know what,at the end of the day,
how the ends are met, themeans are met, Like you know,
you don't question or you could doit, means definitely once to do it,

(27:30):
once the sausage gets made. Don'task any more questions. They got
there. No, you probably don'twant to know question. Yeah, because
you did say when you get abill, you pay it right away.
I do as soon as it comesin. So then make it like that,
like a week before Mother's Day,send the card. Yeah, you're
right, absolutely ran to yep.Oh, here's one of the hot chicks
and guns, you know, yeah, yeah, eating a steak. You're

(27:55):
gonna pay attention to that calendar?Oh you bet, Yeah, I don't.
And maybe I'll get distracted because allthe blood of rush writes my penis.
Oh yeah, yeah, we'll haveany more not doing a whole lot
in your brain. True, somaybe if it went downstairs, that's true
eight seven, seven forty four.If you want to call in, hit
us up with the text over totwo two nine eight seven. We got

(28:17):
some Friday fail stories. We gotthe d y Q coming up for you
this hour, your chance to winsome stuff with this Friday morning dumb ass
contest Friday fild stories. Here wego. Well, here we are once

(29:06):
again, Lady Job in Boys andGirls your Friday fail stories. All these
people probably have the perfect plan,the plan that could never go wrong.
But somewhere along the line it wentfor being a great idea to one big
staked mega uber. I'll try notbad. That was pretty good. There

(29:40):
was a moment there where I thoughtit might go off the rails, but
we got nice job, team,nice job. That was pretty good.
Sweet all right, Well, startingwith this one we talked about this when
that happened. It was this YouTuberTrevor Jacob. He was flying over a
national forest in California getting some contentfor his YouTube page when the planes engine
fail. Oh no, So heopened up the side door and because it

(30:03):
was all outfit with the cameras,because you know he's a YouTuber, he
jumped out of the plane. Hejust happened to have a parachut out and
ended up posting the twelve minute crashvideo on his channel got nearly three million
views. Fail in a mechanic fornot maintaining the plane, you would think
that. After an investigation by theFAAC, Bass prosecutors found that he never
planned on reaching that destination. Theplan all along was to crash the plane

(30:26):
for views. He was also lyingto the FAA, so they revoked his
pilot's license last year, and nowhe has pled guilty to obstructing a federal
investigation. The charge of destruction andconcealment with the intent to obstruct a federal
investigation carries up to twenty years.It failed jail, but he got three

(30:51):
million views. Yeah, now hecould do a POV from jail. Yeah,
yeah, I just love that he'sgonna think about this forever. Idiots.
Yeah, hey, but it's forsocial media, man, Yeah cool,
just pranking. Oh yeah yeahrank Soplace in North Carolina they pulled this

(31:15):
guy over names Joshua Russell, andthe cops saw him run into a big
field and they couldn't see exactly wherehe went. But Joshua had seen a
group of cows and thought he couldhide where they were laying, so he
tried. But when the group ofcows banded together, they exposed josh by
physically leading the cops to exactly wherehe was hiding. The officers able to

(31:36):
find him thanks to the cows,arrest them. It took him right to
fail jail head out of here snicheand cows. Yeah, here's one from
Florida where the cops they arrived atthe house to arrest this guy. No
one was home, but then theyheard something coming from the attic incomes to
police dugan, oh did you dobaby? And it found a ghost in

(31:59):
the eye and like a good boy, the donk found the guy they were
looking forward trying to hide in thecorner of the attic, and so they
tried to get him to come outon his own, but he refused,
and then right about that time iswhen he came crashing through the ceiling,
landed flat on his back on thebedroom floor. He was then pepper sprayed,
tasted, arrested, sus and taketrapped in an attic with the police

(32:25):
dog. And then he fought throughon your back and then tas you gotta
stay on the joie hit us onthe drywall. Yeah. Fail. Story
from Toronto where this teenager was witha couple of his buddies riding the subway
when he decided that what would beeven more cool than riding in the train
would be to ride on the train. He's not wrong, So he opened

(32:46):
the door you know that leads tothe space between the cars, climbed up
between them. But before he couldmake it to the roof, his head
stuck up a little too far andgot smashed by an unknown object. Oh
no he did. The police haveclassified the incident as death by misadventure.

(33:06):
Yeah, exciting work, an unknownobject, the ceiling anything, Yeah,
yeah, it's like the old likeWiley coyote. Yeah, you know,
they're on top of the train.They get to the tunnel and like,
yep, just up, yep,you lived your whole life for years and

(33:28):
then that's it right there. ToFloridas have been fired after declaring a man
dead even though he was still alive. Yeah, so the paramedics told a
woman in clear Water to stop givingher sixty six year old father CPR even
though um, I guess he wasstill breathing. The paramedics continued to pronounce

(33:49):
him dead. Notified law enforcement wentto another call. Oh so, yeah,
now they're all looking at losing theirmedics license. Don't you think that's
a probably a good idea, saildumbass? I mean, do they really
try when they're that old? Iwonder that, you know, it's kind
of like, uh, you know, this is obviously the six that's not
old, but they're just spending they'respending less and less time. Like when

(34:10):
you go to a doctor or whatever, it's almost like a pit stop because
they're they're trying to get so manypatients and patients in. Or you know
these EMTs are they on the clocktoo? You know, like when you
go through a drive through at afast food place, you see it has
like a timer going because there's astandard that the company expects the drive through
people to meet, like well,people to from an order to completion of

(34:31):
order an x number of you know, minutes. Well, that's how independent,
you know, ambulance companies make money. Yeah, so maybe they're like
on the clock that you know what, forget it, he's not, he's
yeah, this geezer is over.And finally you're halfway there, Menace?
What you're right this way? Morethan more than halfway there? Menace sixty

(34:54):
six in his forties, you're there. I'm not well, I mean Raybe's
standing on the doormat still old keezeryou ask. Here's one from Pittsburgh,
PA for the Woody Show is proudto be heard weekday mornings on one oh

(35:14):
five nine the X. A mansomehow got to the airport and plenty of
time, checked his bag and thensomehow missed the boarding call for his flight
at the bar. I did notsee the reason, but instead of just
sucking it up and getting on thenext flight, he said that there was
a bomb in his check back.Smart and here's why, because you know

(35:36):
that will keep the plane there longerand then you'll have time to get on
board. Right. Great. Oh, he was arrested, taking to fail
jail. What a jack off?How do you think that's gonna end.
I've gotten to the airport many hoursearly and almost missed my flight twice because
because he is at the bar.Look, if you say there's a bomb,

(35:57):
there had better be a bomb orI don't. Only you miss in
your flight, You're going to prison. Oh mega jail, dumbass? Like
what universe do you think that makesany sense? And that's going to help
you in some reason? Stories arealways successful, Dumbassright, Oh, all
right, we're gonna take a quickbreak. We got some more Friday.
What do you show for you next? He smoke break that cigarettes were smoking

(36:17):
hands returns in a second people showHi, Well it's finally here, you
guys. What And just in timefor Mother's Day, which is on Sunday,
The annual how much stay at homeMom should the world's most realistic list

(36:45):
off the Richter So, according tosalary dot com, they try to figure
out how much mom should earn forthe eighteen or so jobs that she does
in the course of any given day, and they say that moms, based
on that should if they're being paidfor their work, you're making one hundred

(37:05):
eighty four thousand, eight hundred andtwenty dollars a year. Wow, all
right, you're ever going to endthis sexist charade where we don't do this
list for dad's thank you because nothingzero. All they do is go off
to work whatever. Just add twentyfive percent of that number getting you know,
all right, and then you'll havethe number hypothetical. If you're negotiating

(37:30):
with your wife on how much youwould be paying her per year, how
much would you pay? Well,then I'm gonna take off room and board,
huh, you know, I meanutilities, sexual pleasure because the things
that's a credit on her side becausethey're they're essentially splitting hairs, nickel and

(37:50):
diming and all the stuff to findout what that number is, like childcare
two point six three hours, houseworkone point five seven hours, and if
the median hourly wage for housekeepers isfourteen forty and it staying at home mom,
got that, you see it?So they're doing that with all these
different things. You can cut offsome of that housework for your wife,
food prep and clean up. Yeah, one point seven nine hours. Yeah,
because we have zero points. Yeah, get travel related to kids,

(38:13):
which that's the thing, man.If I had to say the one thing
where it's constant shuttling back and forth. Nothing ever times out perfect, that
nothing is ever like just like alignedin an efficient way. It's like my
son has to be at his hockeypractice or his game at this time,
but then there's an hour difference beforemy daughter has to be at her thing,
and that's over here and then youknow, so what do you do

(38:36):
in the meantime? Right? Likeyou drive all the way back home just
to be there for fifteen minutes,just to drive all the way back over
to wherever it's twenty minutes away.So that's that the shuttling around I think
of everything would be the biggest painin the assay. If I'm looking from
you know what she's doing that,you know, I would want no part.
So what's to find? Number lawnand garden care point one zero hour?

(39:00):
What's okay for what? Most ofthe time I don't see moms out
there mulling the grass all that much. No offense, ladies, But like
we get garbage lawn. Maybe they'replanting, killing, killing stuff, lifting
stuff things. Yeah, like that'sthe stuff we usually get tasked with.
I don't really see a lot ofmoms yeah planting. Yeah, So anywhere.

(39:22):
That's the number this year, momswould make one hundred and eighty four
thousand, eight hundred and twenty.I would give her. M hmm.
I would say, like, let'slet's give her seventy thousand. Seventy thousand.
Do you think you'll get pushed backon that, man, because I
think that's just pure profit. That'spure profit, that's pure whatever you want
money. Think about it. Becauseroom board, all of them, all

(39:42):
that stuff is handled. Yeah.Right, so seventy thousand it's pretty bad.
Yeah, And you would demand thatyou would not have to do any
of the shuttling and all that garbage. I mean, no job. I
do chip in. And I'm alsowilling to you know, I'm willing to
help bound, which is maybe weneed to end this sexist list. It's
like how you know Greg makes thebed before the hotel cleaning people come,
right, they're just trying to help, right, They're just trying to be

(40:05):
tidy. If you want to playthe d y Q, we got the
phones open for that. Eight sevenseven forty four woody. That's eight seven
seven forty four woody. It's ourdumb ass contests. The best talking to
do a drunk. We got somequestions. We'll see how Sammy and Menace
do. They're stone cold, sober, and your chance to win next again
if you want to play eight sevenseven forty four wood They're gonna scan all
the way for free food real quick, and then we'll be right back the

(40:27):
Woodie Show. It's really weird.This is the Woody Show and time four
your Friday morning dumb ass contest.You guys ready, let's play du Q.
Yeah, d u i Q eightseven seven forty four Woody is the

(40:49):
number we're asking you to call ifyou want to be our contestant. Let's
say hello to this morning's contestant.That would be Daniel. Good morning,
Daniel, Daniel, Daniel, Hey, guys, I mean it's like hoy
Daniel. All right, we're gonnaplay the dy Q one. Don't you
go ahead and explain the game toeverybody? See bad. But the game
is I ask a drunk person obviouslysuper easy trivia questions, and you play

(41:10):
the game by guessing whether that persongets the answer correct or incorrect. You
don't guess yourself. You already knowthat's obvious, duh. If you can
guess whether the drunk person knows theanswer two times out of three, you
win the games for funzies. We'reasking Menace and Sammy to see if they
know the answers to these questions.But Daniel, again, just the drunk.
You just gotta guess yes or no, get two out of three,
two out of three in order towin. And before we get to those

(41:34):
questions, we're gonna get to knoware drunk a little bit better, get
a better idea of just how withit or not with it they are?
And who is this person? Seebad? This is a bro out partying.
His name's Alan, and we're justgonna talk to him trying to figure
out what he's drinking and why.All right, to be honest, I
can drink whatever I want. Ijust want to get drunk. I had
no idea. I just want toget like. You all have one life

(42:00):
and that's it. You need toenjoy yourself and you need to live your
life till the limit. Are yougonna look up with a guy tonight you
think, No, I'm actually married. Look at this diamond ram we're talking
about like chicks. This is somebodyI would love to hang. I'm surprised
you didn't tack me right there,you know, together, we're talking about

(42:21):
dude and it took a big swigof his bud light and ram his name
is Edward. Are you gonna gohome to Edward tonight? Obviously? I
will. I canna get that ifyou know what I mean? Yeah,
yeah, this guy. First ofall, it's not a mystery. You
said what it is? Yeah?Oh but that do you mean? Kiss?

(42:43):
Right? Oh? No, exactlywhat? All right? So Daniel,
are you ready for the questions?Ye? All right, here we
go breakfast, Yeah, we go, duy Q Question number one. A
polygon with five sides is called what? All right? Okay, one more
time? Menas Yeah, A polygonwith five sides is called what. A

(43:06):
polygon with five sides polygonal is calledwhat. Let's go to Raby. What
do you think sweep it for?No Ah? Yeah, and again Raby
does have the advantage to be ableto see the dumb feaded look on their
faces. Let's have to scratch somethingon paper. Somebody you just startled away,

(43:30):
doesn't know where to look, isnot moving just his eyes are kind
of darting a little bit. Uhyeah, Sammy looks like she just ate
a tird sandwich. Look at there, Greg Gory, let's go triple No,
triple triple No, I mean it'salways a luck factory. Menace.
What do you think? Heck,no, he's gonna get it, U

(43:50):
Sammy. No, all right,Daniel, what do you think? Yes?
Or no? On our drunk friend, Alan, she will not get
it. She will not dare you? All right, Well, we're gonna
start with menace and Sammy. Questionnumber one for the d y Q.
A polygon with five sides is calledwhat a hexagon? A hexagon? I

(44:12):
wrote down a hexagon as well,But that's six sides, right, hexagon
is six? Yeah, that's notthe answer. We're looking for. What's
one below that hex hex Uh?I don't know, wrote it down.
Start on the bottom. Okay,so the government building, very famous building
in the district, Pentagon, TrialSquare, Pentagon. Ye, all right,

(44:35):
well, question number one for thed y Q. Let's see if
Daniel is on the board. Apolygon with five sides is called what triangle?
I'm so, why are you sodrunk? Though, guys, I've
been drinking way too much. Allright, n a triangle? Daniel,
You're on the board with one pointhere in this round of the d you

(45:00):
got two questions to earn one morepoint. Next question is, in basketball,
for each team, how many playersare on the court at one time
this time of year? I meanobvious in basketball, for each team,
how many players are on the courtat one time? All right, um,
Greg Gory, let's triple now again? Well, yeah, I'm sticking

(45:22):
with it. Yeah, triple No, I think I didn't Seemmy knows.
I think question on this is itfor both just the one team? Or
is it Let's listen to the questionagain. Let's listen to the question again.
In basketball for each team, howmany players are on the court at
one time for each for each team, I got a question, So that's

(45:42):
not both teams? How many stillwe had? Did you really not understand
until Ray said it's not both?Yeah? No, I wasn't sure time.
It's right there. In basketball,for each team, how many players
are on the court at one time, not combined for each team. He's
after the entire league. Yeah,I would you just say for one team?

(46:05):
Each team? Different? Sammy,I get it. I understand what
you're saying. Now now I'm questioning. I think it's actually sitting next to
menace and oh god, yeah,I'll say no for Alan, no for
Alan, and then I'm gonna go, man, you have to after all
that too, I'm gonna say doubleyes. Yeah, I'm double yes as

(46:29):
well. Yeah, yes for bothSammy and Menace, and then no for
Alan, Greg Gory, I'm stilltrip and you're sticking with that? Yeah,
why not? All right? Doyou think that Alan's gonna know what?
Menace? No, Sammy? No, Daniel? What do you think
on Alan? Yes or no?No? All right? Question number two
for the d U i Q.In basketball, for each team, how

(46:50):
many players are on the court atone time? Sammy? Five? Eight?
Eight is incorrect? Five is correct? Imagine sixteen dudes, I thought
you watched basketball. I do,but I don't count the number of people
on the court. I'm just lookingfor threes, dog eight Can you imagine?

(47:15):
And obviously this is related to thethat's like little kid basketball, you
know, where everybody's just like swarmedaround the ball. Can you name any
sport and the number of players onthe field slash court at a time.
Let's go with baseball. Let's startwith baseball. Baseball. Yeah, on
defense, Let's say when you're onthe field, how many players are on
the field. Uh seven for baseball, football, for football, yeah,

(47:42):
oh ten soccer, clothes, tennis, soccer, Yeah, doubles and tennis.
That bends on soccer, Um,I would say depend on well,
if you're playing little kids soccer soccer, soccer, don't tell them that standard
number. Standard number professional would beseven players, I believe as well.

(48:02):
Hockey hockey. We're with him completelyso far. Uh hockey eight? All
right, sounds good. Yeah,I've been to all the games exactly two
people. Yeah, over on thatone time? All right, Well,

(48:24):
Alan says that I'm sorry. Danielsays an awl will not get this question
right. And if he's right onthat, guest, he's gonna be the
winner of the d y Q.Question number two in basketball, for each
team, how many players are onthe court at one time? Twelve?
I think, Yeah, I saidthat. Tough rids coming out, all

(48:51):
right, Daniel h congratulations and hangon one Segon. We'll get all your
information. Appreciate listen the week show, have a great weekend. Love you,
I love our forty tea. Yes, there are twelve players on a
basketball team, but that again onthe court. Yeah, we're talking on
the court at any given time,each team each he lucked into twelve.
But that's not cheez Sammy. Allright, well question number three, which

(49:14):
Daniel did not need. Here wego complete the FDR line. The only
thing we have to fear is okayuh oh man uh Alan No, right,
I don't know where to go atthese two. I'm gonna say no
for Alan and who say the answeris STD FDR? I know I had

(49:37):
that once? All right, doI go on the limb double yes?
It's so easy it is. Oh, I'm double yes. No, yes,
I'll double yes. So no forAlan, No to Alan, Yeah,
yes to menace. I'm saying noto Sammy. No to Sammy.
I am let's find out IQ.Question number three, the FDR line.

(50:00):
The only thing we have to fearis not be able to express yourself how
you want to be, does itUSA? Yeah? That one is wrong.
I like that one. There's athere's a clue. It's not that
yeah, menace. Uh, fearitself, Sammy, fear itself? Yeah,

(50:23):
but how did you know that?I don't listen to FDR speeches?
Yeah? What what wasn't alive?That was forever goo bl for real?
Nobody knows this. Yeah, you'reold you know. Yeah, well that's
how you played the d y Q. I think more what he shows next?
Hangout the morning. Dam we areinto another new album in Sensitivity Training,

(50:52):
Free politically correct World. It's Fridaymorning. Yeah, we're nipping,
We're ripping, We're slipping, We'reripping, zip on zipping. That's right.
It's May twelve, twenty twenty three. I'm woody. That's raving,
Greg Gory, Good Mary, wegot menace? What ass there's Sammy good
Mart phones are open at eight sevenseven. You can hit us up with

(51:14):
the text over to two two nineeight seven. We might have a special
treat for everybody this hour. Reallyyeah, didn't see this coming. Yep.
But you know, we had mymom on the air and she was
talking about that topic that we hadabout the dumbest thing your kid did.
She had four things just off thetop of her head. How much time

(51:36):
do we have exactly? Well,somebody else's mom is calling in yep,
and it'd be Raby's mom. Ahright, love, Yeah, that's the
best arranging it. She is readyto go, all right, sweet is
available is available? Raby was goingto check on availability last night. Heard
well, her schedule is busier thanus. All right, So yeah,

(51:59):
Raby's mom, we'll call in andshare with us some of the dumbest things
that that Raby did. Little Raby. Yeah, I mean it was so
bad, the story about how shegot sent to go live with her grandmother.
Well, all teenage girls suck,and it's not because it's not because
like you're so easy to deal withand you're not doing dumb stuff, right

(52:19):
boy, that that was just abad attitude, all right, Oh no
kidding, that's where we've never experiencedthat. Well, yeah, thank god,
that's faded off. Yeah right,you outgrew that, kidding. You'll
be there one day, what youall right? So that's that's coming up
this hour. Raby's got nerd outfor this is out with and what is

(52:45):
happening in the world of nerds.Well, the Guardians are going to have
their way with the box office againthis weekend. The only major studio release
is something Sammy can Take her GrandmaToo, book Club The Next Chapter.
That's a movie starring Jane Diane Keaton, Kandice Bergen and Mary Steamburgin. So
it's another older ladies on an adventuremovie. Grandma. It's a a sequel

(53:08):
to a movie I've apparently book Club, which I don't recall at all.
Right, this time around, though, they're taking their dream trip to Italy
Bluckey and has a fifty three percentfrom the critics but an eighty six percent
from the audience, So much likeeighty for Brady, which critics correctly identified
as a piece of crap, butthe audience loved it. So what you're

(53:30):
saying is these old ladies got afree trip to Italy, saying that's why
Jane Fonda said, yes, Ican hang out in Italy for like six
weeks. You got it. Deal. There are also a couple of movie
dumps into tenners, including Hypnotic,which stars Ben Affleck. He's a detective
investigating the mystery behind his missing daughterthirty nine percent from critics and a forty

(53:50):
two percent from the audience. Ishe a miserable man? There's that door.
I think it's like he's pissed.Somebody's filming him just kidding, That's
what his response was. And therewas also him at that award show where
she was all like dancing, He'sjust sit at the table. Well,
when he was doing interviews for Air, he was just saying that he has

(54:13):
resting bitch face with it all thetime. I understand that, but the
way he closed a door, hewas clearly he was slam He was just
at the situation. Oh so dumpedinto theaters is Fool's Paradise, a comedy
written and directed and starring Charlie Day, and he plays a mute guy who
just got released from a mental facilitywho happens to look exactly like a method

(54:37):
actor who won't leave his trailer.And apparently Charlie Day got everyone he knows
to make a cameo in this becausejust doing favors because Rotten Tomatoes gives it
a twenty seven percent from critics fortythree percent from the audience. But the
cast has kid Beck and sal rayLeo toa ripg Adrian Brownie, Jason sudik
Is, Edie Falco, Jason Bateman, Common, John malcov and Ken Jones.

(55:00):
Thank you? What's his favorite?Ken Jones? Oh yeah, although
he's not it's not as oversaturated withKen jeonges these days because you can avoid
him because he's doing mass singer stuff. Don't watch that for a minute.
There it was. It was allKen all the time. Okay, every
movie, every TV show, everyhosting commercial. Yeah, it was like,

(55:20):
can we get it, get it? Get it? Understand up,
it's not good. Oh it's sobad. All he does is talk about
how famous he is. We justtalked about Air, which is a much
better Ben Affleck movie than this hypnoticAnd if you didn't see it in theaters,
it's now available for you on Amazon. Nice. In time for Mother's
Day, Netflix has The Mother starringMissus Affleck j loo A. They cast

(55:45):
j Loo as a former assassin whomust come out of hiding to protect the
daughter she gave up from dangerous man. The Hollywood Reporter calls it and enjoyably
silly Netflix movie. Yeah, alwaysthink of that, like what like I'm
at the grocery store, Like thisis what people do. Like j Loo
right now is on a film stset somewhere pretending to be an excess.

(56:07):
That's her day right there to gopretty cool. And I guarantee you it's
getting read reviews too, because thepress junket that they did for it and
the like over the top. Ohyeah, they sent everybody everyone to New
York City. Oh well, thisis the first I was even hearing about
It. Hulu has season three ofthe Greats with Ellen Fanning and Nicholas Hout.

(56:30):
Disney Plus at Spider Man Homecoming andVenom to the platform today. You
want to be sure you're not lostwhen you go see Fast X next weekend,
So Peacock has added F nine soyou could catch up and make sure
you know where the story is andyou know how it's all about family,
right, I mean Paul's daughter isin it, right, Yea, she

(56:51):
has a cameo, yes, uh? And uh, what do you've been
looking forward to? This? OnApple TV plus still Michael J. Fox
movie where he reflects on his lifeand career in his battle with Parkinson's I
mean you go into it. No, it's gonna be a bummer. But
what's interesting to me is it hasfascinating a ninety eight percent from critics on

(57:12):
Rotten Tomatoes. Who's like the onecritic who's the turning like the Michael J.
Foxe is a more positive spin onthis an interview I know right,
probably Ken Jennings is going to finishup hosting this season of Jeopardy because my
and Bolic refuses to cross the writerstrike pick it. But what does Ken

(57:34):
Jennings care. Yeah. Also,who's writing that? I mean, it's
not that hard well for sure,and all the writing is done. They
have all the material they need becausethe questions and answers written well before it
to strike. Though. My mdoes have more time to host Jeopardy because
Fox canceled her sitcom. I didn'tknow the cats and it went three seasons
really really Oh so I know,just like book Club for the next chapter.

(58:02):
You guys didn't realize that call mekat when three seasons on Fox or
exist? And now all right,what Raby? I got it for you.
The one critic who crapped on theMichael J. Fox documentary is Andrea
Thompson from the well known site Wealthof Geeks. Says he's saying there's little
said. It's nice, but there'slittle to recommend beyond the usual fluff piece.
So I guess it didn't delve enoughinto Michael Jay Fox's dirty pet.

(58:25):
Wow. Wow, how Grady iscrap on him? Andrea Wealthy the site
that should definitely be included. I'mRaby. For more nerd stuff, check
out the nerd podcast at The WoodyShow dot com. Thank you very much,

(58:45):
Rabels. I'm gonna talk to Raby'smom. Oh my sweet yeah Pat
Raby and about Raby's past. Yeah, well they get her dirty past.
Okay, great? Next on TheWoody Show, has the Woody Show,
will be right back? Wrote itdown a rogen zone. It's nonsense.

(59:09):
The Woody Show, all right,Friday morning, rolling on, It's The
Woody Show. Mother's Day on Sunday. We talked to my mom earlier this
week and uh, we had thattopic and you guys were sharing your stories.
My mom shared her four things thatcame to the top of her head
to me about when I asked thequestion, what's the dumbest thing that he

(59:31):
did as a kid? I couldn'treally like. I was trying to help
and I polished all right. Itried to clean the floor of the kitchen,
which is linoleum with pledge, anddamn near killed my mom because I
think I told the other story onthe air before where I hung up on
my shirts, my T shirts,but I hung them up on the wall

(59:52):
hammer and nails with nails. Thebabysitter just let it happen. Yeah,
my mom wanted to kill the babysittermore than me. Still also on the
but we have now Raby's mom.Right, nice, No, hold on
one second, let me go toPat, Hi, Pat that good morning.
What do you show today? Thanksfor having me on. Of course,

(01:00:15):
now before we go any further,you know, not to swear on
the air, right, yes,I understand that completely. Yeah, try
to control yourself, you know.Well do happy Mother's Day and thank you.
Yeah. How's everything going? Everythinggoing pretty well? Everything is going

(01:00:35):
well. Yeah, firing really good. Um, getting ready for my second
surgery and all that. It's allthat's got all right, good, all
right? Yeah, No, itwasn't all that long ago that finally Renee
started sending you cards on Mother's Day, which was nice because for the longest
time it wasn't. We used toyell at her all the time, like
why you should thank us because weshamed her into it we did. But

(01:00:59):
I mean, she loves you.She has a really funny way of showing
it sometimes, you know what Imean? Yeah, yeah, that's just
so Pat. We had a questionwith the listeners or this week my mom
called in and the question was,what's the dumbest thing your kid did?
And so let's just keep it toRavy here. I mean, I know
you have two. I heard Iheard your mom would whenever because she was

(01:01:22):
on earlier this week, and Ithought, man, she's going to be
a tough act to follow. Shedid such a great job. Congratulations to
her. Yeah. Yeah, butI was mostly an angel, right mom?
Like seriously, yeah, except forthese few things. Okay, Well

(01:01:44):
she always has conceded in full ofherself. That's how we want to know
and selfish. Oh my gosh,wow. Yeah? So what what what
made your What made your list?Um? The first thing was Ravy was
probably h three years old and Michaelwas less than one, and she found

(01:02:05):
some scissors and decided she needed touse them. Not only did she cut
her hair, she cut Michael's two. Michael's cut was a great, big
place in the center of his foreheadwhere it went clear back, clear back
to the skull. He hadn't evenhad his first haircut yet. We were

(01:02:30):
waiting for his birthday to take himto this place called Joe's barber Shop because
it was walking distance to my mom'shouse, and that's where we wanted him
to have his first haircut. That'sa big deal, especially the first haircut.
Ray was just saving you money.Yeah, she took care of it,

(01:02:50):
yo, had did I cut myhead? Yeah, that's what she
said. Cut hair and Michael,well, yours was mostly in the back
for some reason, so it wasn'treally that bad. I could straighten that
up. But there was nothing youcould do for poor Michael. It makes

(01:03:12):
sense now that he never visits thattrue, just sends his kids out here.
All right. What else? Andthen whenever she was I would say
around four or so, she hadthis duck that she really liked. It
was a hard plastic duck and itwas it had wheels on it, and

(01:03:34):
she wrote it. Yeah, andshe used that thing all the time and
she loved it. The next thing, I know, the next time I
saw it. I always kind ofput it away when they went to bed,
And the next time I saw it, it was fingernail polished all over
it. Not only was the duckfinger polished, but the walls were finger

(01:04:03):
little decoration. It would work,oh god, anything it was. And
I just left it on the duck. But I had other things to clean
up. Yeahs always getting the nailpolish. Yeah, nail polish for kids
needs to be locked up. Seriously, it's way too tempting. Yeah yeah,

(01:04:24):
yeah, so colorful at the time. That was the time when I
didn't use Neil polished either. SoI have no idea. There was the
house. It had to be Yeah, you're stoopid. We're talking to Raby.
This is Raby's mom, Pat,and we had that Mother's Day topic
was the dumbest thing your kid hasdone? And she's sharing just a few

(01:04:46):
things. A few thinks that thefew things because mostly angelic. Yeah,
except for when he got sent awaywith the grandparents. One else, one
other one other time time they wereplaying outside in the backyard. We had
a big backyard. It wasn't Itwas fenced in on two sides, but
not on the one side, sothat I always had to keep an eye

(01:05:11):
on him. So they didn't leavethe backyard. So they were playing in
the backyard. I was in thekitchen. The next thing I knew,
Michael came screaming, crying into thehouse, just absolutely horrible. And so
I, you know, went afterhim and said, Michael, what's wrong?
What happened? And I'm looking forblood. I'm looking for conscious things.

(01:05:35):
You know, A scratch, ascrape is something bad. And he
said, m renee bit me,oh wow, around his back. Not
only did he have teeth marks,but he had upper teeth and lower teeth.

(01:05:56):
An, I've never seen a bitelike that before the race when when
Ravey came in, I said toher, why would you do something like
that? And she said her answerwas in case he wanted to cry because

(01:06:18):
he wanted to feel. Just thinkthat I took care of it. God,
what a good big sister scalping itthat was. That was something that
none of us are ever gonna forget. When she was right, Yeah,

(01:06:39):
that's so weird. Right again,I get why he doesn't visit. She's
old enough to get in the carand drive to the pharmacy to go eat
your bandais, he's afraid of injury. Pat can I ask some rapid fire
questions about young Rave? Did shealways hate did she always hate vegetables?
Oh that's a good she really neverliked them? Okay. How she always

(01:07:03):
would always be left on her platewhenever she was done eating, and she
was sure that I wouldn't realize thatshe hadn't eaten them. Did she always
have what we call ravy luck?Good luck? You know I have good
luck at the casinos and stuff winningconstantly? Yeah, things always going to

(01:07:26):
everything, goes her way. Thatpart started probably whenever she was in her
teens, like fourteen or fifteen.There was you know the race track where
your dad works. Yeah, wewould go to the races every once in
a while, and she would haveher dad place her bets for her because
she was too young. Yea,and she would win. And once when

(01:07:51):
we were even when she was ableto allow to bet, Um, she
placed the bet and she came backand um, she had money from winning
the time before, and so shewatched the race and that was another winner.
So she got up, she decidedshe's going to the casino. So

(01:08:11):
she came back the whole mit poolof money. Yeah. Did she get
good grades in school? She did, Yeah, she did okay, And
until that speech class, I neverI never had to coax her to do
homework or anything like that. Shealways got it done. And then the

(01:08:31):
last one was when you visit herupon a move, which has been a
long time since she's moved. Ihaven't moved in quite a while. She
claims that you quote love putting contactpaper into cabinets, so she puts you
to work. Is that true?Yeah, she does always put me to
work when it whenever Yeah, contactpaper was always my chore because she did

(01:08:54):
not want to do that. Ohwow, that's not necessarily because you love
it. Because you love it,So she just doesn't want to do it.
It just got to be my job. She has she always been like
a down dirty liars. She hasbeen known to tell some wild stories.

(01:09:17):
I mean, I have a storyabout her. Um from grade school.
She was, it's not dumb,but it's it is kind of funny,
all right. Um, she wasin second grade. She and her first
grade boyfriend had broken up. Sonow she has a new boyfriend. His

(01:09:38):
name is Stephen Tide. And shecame home one day and said, uh,
Stephen and Stephen and I kissed today, which was kind of a shocker
to me. Wow, I said, My first question was where did this
happen, Renee? And she saidin the boys' bathroom? Wow? Why

(01:10:04):
the boys bathroom? Yes, shesaid, because Stephen was afraid to go
into the girls' bathroom. That wasthat's funny you said that, because I
was just going to ask you.And you know how long I've known Raby
since I was seventeen. It's beena long long time. And in that

(01:10:24):
entire time, Pat, can youbelieve I've never once, have ever been
introduced or have known about any boyfriend, not once. My question is very
quiet about those, Yeah, myquiet. Have you ever met somebody that
she's dated? Have you ever meta boyfriend? Um? Yeah, I've
met a few, but they didn'tlast of the widow. She knew Louie

(01:10:48):
from high school, whose ID braceletI still have. I was just going
to say that yearning for Louis,he's the one that lasted the longest,
and that I knew the best.Yeah yeah, Well first grade decided they
were too young. Yeah, downmoved away, so that ended. I

(01:11:12):
said, maybe they should have hada baby to save the relationship. First
grade. Well, Pat, thankyou so much, and we miss you,
and we hope you're you're doing welland that the other surgery goes well.
And have a have a great Mother'sday. Hid to John for us,
and uh yeah, thank you forcalling him. Appreciate love you,

(01:11:32):
Thanks, thanks for having me on, Love all you guys. All right,
back to that mountain of cocaine,right Pat, waiting on you party
animal range Now we know where Rabygets it. Yeah, all right,
Pat, thank you you're welcome.All Right, there's Raby's bones. I

(01:11:56):
don't want to show his next next. Well, great news, queers.
Oh, the FDA has finally gottenwith the times and they've updated their policy
to allow gay men in relationship todonate blood. Oh wow, were They've

(01:12:20):
been loosening it for a while,and I was fit. I was wondering
about this recently because you know,we were talking about how people get upset
about the dumbest things, and Ishared the story about how this show got
boycotted, protested, like people withsigns and everything outside the station because we
promoted a Red Cross blood drive andI didn't know, like, what could

(01:12:40):
you pot? Like, why you'repromoting this and they don't accept blood from
uh, gay people are intervenous drugusers. I'm like, I don't make
the rules. They just said theyneeded blood if the supply was like critically
low, and we're trying to helpout. You're trying to do a good
thing here. It's so weird thatthat protest was in Dallas, Texas.
Oh wait, it's when we werein San Francis scope right. I wonder

(01:13:01):
if any of those protesters, ifthey were in a car accident or something,
they would say, nope, I'mnot taking the no thank yous?
Right, oh yeah, oh yeah, getting well, you couldn't do it
before on kind of you know,AIDS, which is what everybody was worried
about. But the science now suggeststhat it's not really necessary. More importantly,
it could help with blood shortages.So well, yeah test, the

(01:13:23):
tests are much more rapid now itwas. It was done for scientific reason.
Yeah. Yeah. Now we talkedto uh Raby's mom before the break
and wasn't she sweet? I promisehim not adopted. I say the same
thing out that people meet my mom. So yeah, but we're talking about
that Raby luck. There's some Rabyluck in the news. This guy in

(01:13:45):
Michigan, he bought some lottery tickets, and it's the same old story.
You buy the tickets, you forgetto check the numbers. Like you buy
these tickets, they end up ina glove department, right that department You
buy the tickets and they just sitaround and then finally, like the lottery
has to say, guys, there'sa million dollar winner out there that needs
to be claimed by next week orelse it's in the end gone forever.

(01:14:06):
While this guy, he forgot tocheck the numbers, kept forgetting for over
a month and he finally got aroundto scanning it at the store and they
told him to file a claim withthe lottery office. So he thought he
maybe won like a few thousand bucksforgot about it again. Okay, a
couple of weeks started. A coupleof weeks later, his girlfriend sees the

(01:14:27):
ticket in his car, said,hey, did you ever follow up?
Because she said that you know hewas that. He told her like,
oh, yeah, I finally scannedit. It says I won something.
I got to file something with thelottery. She's like, oh, following
up great, I would go straightto the office. So a couple of
weeks later, girlfriend sees it,nump didn't follow up, So together they
went and they did that, andguess what, more than just a few

(01:14:49):
thousand bucks, he won twenty fivethousand dollars a year for life. Oh
god, yeah, what damn god? A thing? Yeah yeah, they
have I have that. Yeah,I played that when I was like eighteen.
That was like one of the firstscratcher tickets ever bought. It was
like this, I think it wasa thousand dollars a week for life for

(01:15:09):
life. Oh wow. Yeah,So this guy gets a thousand bucks probably
every two weeks. So he uh, he took the lump sum of three
hundred and ninety thousand dollars ticket thatwas just kind of like, you know,
around his car. Apparently doesn't needthe money too. I'll get to
Yeah, I forgot twice. Ohmy god. Yeah, you know it's
like when radio opens any random backpackor drawer. Yeah, look how many

(01:15:31):
times you've found like one hundred dollarbill and something many many bag because yeah,
it's not like a five. CanI tell you how many times that's
happened to me? Zero? Zero, Yeah exactly. If you checked them
all your bike, it just keeplooking. He've got hondys oh yeah,
totally, yeah, totally hundreds ofdollars everywhere I won. I won that
red line BMX bike. Yes,from a shoe store in Princeton, New

(01:15:54):
Jersey when I was a child.And then I found a bill, like
a like a good bill. Ithink it was like a ten or twenty
on street. Once there was theextent of luck. That's it. That's
it. I found a couple hundredbucks snorkeling and MAUI it did yeah,
no, it was just waving atme. I thought it was like seaweed
or somethinging, yeah, And itwas just waving back and forth, and

(01:16:15):
I grabbed and I was talking tosome locals and they're like, oh,
yeah, a lot of money hasbeen showing up in the water. Some
kind of plane explode. Don't goanywhere. The Woody Show will be right
back. They can invite all kindsof negative demonic influences if you're in the

(01:16:36):
know about teammates and they're influence.Yeah, so what do you show Dan?
We are into another new hour ofinsensitivity training for a politically correct world.
It is Friday morning, today's Maythe twelfth, twenty twenty three.
Thank you so much for being heregiving us some of your time this morning.

(01:16:56):
My name is Woody. That israving great Grey, Good morning,
Good morning. Menace is here?What is up? Our social media director?
I find us and follow us atThe Woody Show on Instagram and Twitter
or on Facebook, Facebook dot comslash the wood Show. We got Sea
Bass, we got Sammy Board,Caroline Morgan all here and it is a
time of the week. We haveall the redneck news stories for the week

(01:17:18):
going head to heads to find outwho will be the redneck news story of
the week. Same same blame backsdancing blaa. If you guys know how

(01:17:41):
the competition work. These are allof the stories from this week, going
head to head for your votes.You're gonna listen to all the nominees.
Text the number of the nominee doyou think you win the week? Over
to two two nine eight seven.We'll have until Monday morning, will weave
the votes open through the weekend toeverybody on the podcast has a chance to
get their boat in. Here wego nominee number one. This is from

(01:18:03):
Pulaski County, Arkansas. You gotthis woman named Erica Craig. She has
been having a problem with one ofher neighbors. Okay, according to the
report, they have been pooping inbuckets. Oh what like the five gallon
home depot kind Well, here shehas to tell you more. They've been
taking their faces in buckets and dumpingit at the back of their property and

(01:18:24):
then across the street at another person'sproperty. They've been dumping in on their
property too, And they've been doingthis now for about three years. Everybody
around them have sold their houses,which or even the ones that are still
left here to just kind of justto sit and suffer. Yeah. So
not only does it stay, shesays, when the wind blows, it's
awful. You can't even sit outside, you can't sit with the door open

(01:18:45):
because the smell just consumes the house. Also, the poop has been washing
into her yard when it rains.She says. They've been doing this now,
like I said, three years,and at one point they had a
hauled out porta potty and we're justletting it washed down into the ditches.
Oh my god. So Erica hastried to go through all the proper channels,
but so far, nobody's done anythingabout it. So that's what she

(01:19:08):
called the local news, which iswhere that clip is from, and they
reached out to the county officials,but we're told they don't have authority when
it comes to sewage matters, andthey referred her to the Arkansas Department of
Health, who then told her tocontact a state plumbing inspector, but nobody
from that office. We'll get backto them. Good what a mess.
I have a picture here. It'snot the classiest neighborhood to begin with,

(01:19:30):
but still, I mean, comeon, man, the look that's oh
god, that's that's her picture ofthe neighbor's property. Look at this,
there's like a garbage and old furnitureand wood. Yeah, all that forklift
what they call palettes. It's allstacked at want And that is nominy number
one for your redneck news story ofthe week. Nightmare nomine number two.

(01:19:58):
This one's from Clearwater, Florida,where you have. But started out as
a beautiful story about a woman whohad been given up for adoption as a
baby, but then found out whoher biological father was and they connected through
social media and then finally met upin person. So right the day together,
they got drunk together, they didacid together. Wow, what you

(01:20:20):
know, father daughters, all thatstuff with my dad. Yeah, what
little girl has him? You know? And then back at the hotel,
still tripping balls on acid, aseries of sexual acts occurred, and at
some point the chick started to gether bearings, slithered off to the bathroom
called her boyfriend. Now, guys, imagine getting that call. The boyfriend

(01:20:42):
called the cops. Oh wait,he called the front desk at the hotel,
because that's what you do. Theysent security to the room and check
it out. And when they arrived, the dad, who we now know
his fifty three year old Ronald Antinori. He became alarmed and he fled the
area. All of this was backin August of twenty twenty one, by
the way, all right, okay, Now fast forward to now. Ronald

(01:21:02):
gets pulled over by the cops.They found some drug stuff in his car,
also figured out that he was wantedfor questioning about what exactly happened with
his estranged daughter. So he getsarrested. He's now in jail for not
only the drug stuff they found,but also on charges of incest and battery.
The cord filings did not say anythingabout like why twenty one months went
by before he got arrested, butthey did note that he also goes by

(01:21:25):
the names Johnny Hops and Ron Ratcheterwhen he used to be a professional wrestling
manager. Here's his mug shot,looking real cool guy. That's well,
there you go. That is Nomintynumber two for your redneck news story of

(01:21:45):
the week. Now number three.This one's from Delaware. For the police.
They responded to a call about aguy at a Lowe's home improvement store
who had been doing some shoplifting andhe passed out in one of the aisles.
Hum it's tough work. To thereport, he had huffed multiple cans
of air duster too. Now beforeit got to that point, he had

(01:22:09):
also exposed his genitals and puked allover himself inside the store. Okay,
super classy, What an afternoon.Anyway, the cops arrived, the dude
gets to his feet, but he'snot going to go without a fight.
He makes a fist, but theofficers just not having any of it,
and he just tastes his ass andhe was arrested, taking the jail charge
with seven crimes, including a resistingarrest, shop flifting, loudness. But

(01:22:30):
check this out. They had justarrested this same guy earlier in the same
week outside of a Rite aid pharmacy. Same general behavior, shoplifting, huffing,
trying to fight people. You know, it's almost as if when you
catch and release these criminals, theygo right back to the criminals. Bizarre.
It's almost like the same small groupof people are responsible for most of
the crime. It's almost it's almostlike jails shouldn't have revolving doors. But

(01:22:55):
held on. In this case,we did get a see weener tho true,
there's that animenous reset. Yeah nice, that is nominate number three for
your Redneck News Story of the week. And finally, what a week nominee
number four. This one's from Florida. We're a deputy at the Monroe County

(01:23:15):
Jail noticed a piece of mail thathad come in that had a real nasty
chemical smell, and so they openedit up an inside, we're drugs addressed
to an inmate named Shannon Carroll.Sent to Shannon buy her mother nice mother
daughter relationship that guy going on.They're like, hey, man, I'm
gonna send you a care package ofdrugs. Fifty five year old Nadine Carroll

(01:23:40):
is the mom. Obviously the authoritieshad some questions for so they called her
and said, hey, we needto meet with you about your daughter.
It was in jail in the firstplace, by the way, after she
got busted with coke no and drivingwithout a license. But how sweet is
this? Now mom and daughter arelocked up at the same jail. I'm
sweet. Nadine charge with smuggling contrabandinto jail. And that is nominee number

(01:24:05):
four and your nominees this week foryour Redneck News Story of the Week.
The voting is now open. You'rejust gonna text the number of the nominee
that you think should win the weekover to two two nine eight seven.
We're gonna be the votes open untilMonday morning, so everybody listens to the
podcast has a chance to get theirvotes in. You're gonna text to number

(01:24:28):
one for the story out of Arkansaswhere the woman's been fighting with some neighbors
who have been pooping in buckets anddumping it and stinking up the neighborhood animals.
Text one over to two two nineeighty seven. Text to number two.
The story they're in Clearwater, Floridawith the father daughter reunion thirty years
of them making involves some drinking,dropping acid, and insects. Text to

(01:24:51):
number two over to two two nineeighty seven. Text number three for that
one out of Delaware wh the guystole a bunch of cans of duster,
got high, whipped out his junk, puked all over himself, and then
tried to fight the cops. Yeah, a cool guy. Text three over
to two two nine eight seven.Or text the number four for the mom

(01:25:11):
who got busted mail and drugs toher daughter in jail so it was locked
up on drug charges. She's justtrying to be supportive, right, everybody.
Every kid's got an interest, mom'sdad's got to be there for your
kids. Text four over to twotwo nine eight seven. We're gonna be
voting open until Monday morning. Monday, we'll have the announcement who wins the
week and moves on into the playoffround of the competition. We've got some

(01:25:34):
more Friday, What a show foryou next? Hang up the line,
sticks and stones will break my bones. But but then a soft swill.
Maybe no one else is really soft. Little baby raccoons, a little love,

(01:25:55):
a little sweetie, weeds, rocketreally got me? Guardians three many
tears, Boy, many raccoons.Human beings don't real life human beings done.
I'll tell you what that talking racing. Wow, it's something that needed
to be voiced by Bradley Cooper.Yeah, yeah, it's Greg Glory voice.

(01:26:18):
We need a famous yea yeah,but yeah, I'm with Rabi.
I cried, thank you, thankyou, well, yes, I know
you love it. We got someraccoon news, Yes, rac raccoon news.

(01:26:39):
There's a reason that Menace has beenat the Iowa State Capitol protesting yes
every weekend for quite some time becausethey have declared open season on raccoon hunting.
What's up with that? That iswhat Menace has been saying. What's
up, what's up with what's upwith that? And part of what led
to the passage of open year roundraccoon hunting in Iowa it was the following
speech. All right, this isfrom an Iowa state senator. His name

(01:27:01):
is Bill Dotsler. Hater, yeah, a big time hater you And this
is this is quite like a clip, so feel free to stop and start
as we go through it. Buthe's talking about how he was he has
like van. He sets up forthis bicycle race. It's called rag Brie.
That's, of course you all knowthe Register's annual great bike ride to
cross Iowa. Hear him say raggedby. That's what he's talking about,

(01:27:23):
the bike race. Okay, sothis is Bill Dotsler talking about why he's
in favor of year round raccoon hunting. And the chair recognizes the senator from
blackhawk. Senator Dotsler, thank you. Senator should move that, Michael.
Don't even do it generally, doit aggressively. Yep, yank and grab.

(01:27:43):
I've got a ring and keep movingit. Yeah, speaking, Yeah,
no problem with raccoons in town.I wish we could get rid of
him in town too. Um.You know, I have a rag Bride
bus and after rag Bride, alot of times I to leave food in
there, and I keep a buslocked up, and I have a driver's
window where it's a little slide overthing and there's a latch on it.

(01:28:08):
Sorry, what the hell are youtalking about? This idiot is in governments
and this is what he's worried about. And by the way, this is
why we love local government because they'realways shortened to the point. Oh wait,
it started well, I didn't haveit completely latched, I guess,
but it was shut, and araccoon crawled up on the hood and my
bus hung off the mirror and gothis paws. Is their regular hands slid

(01:28:31):
open raccoons in their regular hands.Thanks for clarifying. Sounds like fault.
Yeah. I love food in there, and I had my window cracked the
window and got in there and hada feast inside my bus. Good And
uh, you know that wasn't theworst part of the aggravation. I didn't
know about it. He ate allkinds of stuff. They want to give

(01:28:55):
us, the whole list. Yeah, read it and proxim me how much
of each thing he ain't. Butthe worst part about it, the worst
part of the aggravation is I hada rag Bry hat from glenn Wood that
said it all started in glenn Wood. Oh, oh, special hat.
We know what the hat says.Yeah, you know, because if you

(01:29:15):
just had a hat. I don'tknow what happened to this hat yet.
Did the raccoon tear it apart?Yeah, it's ripped in pieces. Yeah,
And that wasn't the first rag brightbut the first one they called it
wasn't the first one. It wasn'tvintage. It was the hole spit it
out right, and that raccoon defecatedin my hat. Good, good,

(01:29:43):
excellent, tired growth old four ofa man. Yeah, God, inflation
is out of control. People can'tpay their rent. But you worried about
leaving a window cracked open and araccoon ate your food? Kill loser.
You're way too quickly, menace.Oh, let's load hand without grabbing your
microphone. It's called technique. Buthow much they pay? Dirk and their

(01:30:16):
raccoon defecated in my hat? Bythe way that he goes on, please
stay that clip that raccoon in myhat. Raccoon news. All right,
better raccoon news. This is fromk E T V Omaha where the Alpine
In, big guy like restaurant there. Of course, we all know that
they're celebrating their fiftieth anniversary. Whatmakes them special at the Alpine In,

(01:30:41):
of course, it's well you're aboutto tell you in this clip right here,
an iconic Omaha restaurant is getting readyto celebrate five decades of being in
business. Have you've ever eaten atAlpine In? You know, it's not
just the food that attracts customers.Chicken, the gizzards, livers, chicken
chicken livers best, there's best.But after the sun goes down, you
can toss your scraps and the crittersclean the bone dry. We're welcome in

(01:31:05):
the new baby raccoons eventually in themaybe the middle of June. We are
hoping to go for many more yearsto come. Yeah. Nice. So
they feed the raccoons the leftovers.So what they do is they take literally
chicken scraps, French front whatever.Okay, by the like caseful, they're
those huge like aluminium trays. Yeah, I just toss them on the back
porch, and those raccoons got tobe so fat, they are so happy.

(01:31:30):
So men, as you go visitthe alpine lodge, dude all about
it and watch the raccoons eat.That'd be fun. Raccoons gets health coach,
but who cares whatever? Coach mouthcoach, All right, Sadly,
we have another bad raccoon story here. It's from a CBC Toronto where this
ninety five year old bitch, hername's Mary Joy killed other miserable person.

(01:31:53):
Yeah, misserable, because when shesaw a raccoon out on her afternoon walk,
she didn't like pet it and feedit then cuddle it like you're supposed
to, right said, it attackedher. Let's go to again the report
from the Suddenly there was this animalstanding right in front of me, and
it suddenly jumped up on my leftleg and started to bite me, and

(01:32:14):
it wouldn't go away, and Iwas I was afraid. I should have
probably hit it with my walking sticks, but I didn't think of that.
You know, this nice little ladyout for a walk and suddenly attacked by
this monster. Oh okay, yeah, pigs, if it didn't happen,
you know what I'm saying. Intothe hospital had baby shot now whatever or

(01:32:35):
girl walking the mall without the otherold I didn't know what to do.
I like to be outside. Allthat was my walking. I know I
had a big weapon. I didn'tthink. You can't trust her mind.
She's seeing things. I just lookat it. I'm like, oh yeah,
stick and I thought what can Idon't first it was polio. Now

(01:32:58):
there I stick to everybody in thissecond. We have a new raccoon game.
It is called Dumpster Diver. Noset. This was a Lessen actually
texted this in after we got thatlast raccoon game called Raccoon Tycoon, which

(01:33:21):
yeah, well, Dumpster Diver isa game where you take a plastic dumpster.
Okay, inside of it is hiddena raccoon. You should put little
snacks and treats in there, pizzapieces, you know, plastic versions of
this. Yeah. Then you getyour raccoon hand and you you know,
it's kind of like whatever. Youstick it in the entrance of the dumpster.

(01:33:42):
Try to get the snacks and treatsout, but watch out. The
raccoon might pop out and snap atplay around dump So I gotta get the
treats on top. No, no, no, so get that flap in
front of you, the thing inand out at a bunch of times.
You're not gonna get Yeah, justkind of blow. Okay, this is
for four year olds. Okay,put it back out and put it back

(01:34:03):
in a bunch of times. AllI just want to trigger the all right.
Oh I got some snacks, Igot some get there, I got
oh hot dog, you got banana, I got some cheese, got some
more. Oh, I got somemilk, more apples, some blue blobs.

(01:34:28):
Oh, I got some fish.It broken. Yeah, it didn't
take me nearly as long as Yeah, where's I'm getting all the food,
all the treas though? Oh yeah, you can just flap the tip a
bunch of times. Where's the game, flip it open clothes, let it
close each time it has all right, that's not how to do it.

(01:34:49):
I did it, so you're justgetting it open me. That was crazy
and what you do is you're alldie. Oh that is an angry Raccos

(01:35:12):
dumpster diver available wherever you get gamesfor four year old fun to play one
time. Yeah, it kind ofsucks. Raccoon news, all right,
more good raccoon news. He mighthave seen this. This is from McCallum
in Austin McCallum High School. Ishould say where they have had the great
fortune menace of having an invasion ofraccoon. They've been blessed. O great,
Yeah, they've been. We've beenpopping up everywhere. One died in

(01:35:34):
the walls, and a stankrel bandall right. They also it happens they
also had the fun of a raccoonjust bursting through the ceiling in the middle
of class. Let's go to KX. Yeah, and as they tell us
a story, there are some concerns. One raccoon fell through the ceiling just
feet away from a student. Itwas scared, it was running around and

(01:35:54):
everything. What if it bit her? What if it had rabies. While
it has caused concerns, it isalso created a few laughs. It's gotten
to the point where students have createda like fan account. Nice for the
raccoons. But some students say,if they come face to face with a
raccoon, there's only one thing todo. I want to run. Okay,

(01:36:14):
cool, okay, be a littlebit about it. That's gonna pay
attention to school there. I knowit's called learning about nature. Yes,
it's called learning about nature. Raccoonsin school and what we're talking about Austin,
Texas. That's where the Woody Showis proud to be here in weekday
mornings on at seven five. Shoutout to Steve's crew out in Austin,
Texas. Worked at Uncle Elon's gigafactory. Nice, Ernie IRV and Jack the

(01:36:36):
local two eighty six, Plumb andUnion. That what's up where my cybertruck
out? Yeah? Oh they werejust showing off the other day at the
gigafactory. Hell yeah, oh thegigafactory. Yeah yeah, nice? You
know as it crazy as that guystill talking. Well I didn't have it
completely latched, I guess, butit was shut raccoon and god his pause?

(01:37:02):
Is it their regular hand? Thisis welcome back. Um, it's
been a number of years now,let's say they probably four or five years.
But Applebee's they made like a bigattempt to try to get themselves to

(01:37:24):
be more hip and cool to ayounger demographic. Yeah, they tried with
all those drinks specialist stolar market.Um, but that mission failed and then
more than a hundred locations closed.But now that was the millennial attempt.
It's kind of sticking with gen zgen Z loves Applebee's really yeah, is

(01:37:45):
it ironically? No? No,They said that eighteen to twenty four year
old demo for them is huge,all right. Last year they said,
Applebee's teamed up with Winky Lucks tolaunch Saucy Gloss, which is a lip
gloss line inspired by their wing sauces, and then they marketed with a TikTok

(01:38:05):
song called Taste My Face and thatwent super viral on TikTok. And they
said after that, man, likeall these younger people were coming in themselves,
their parents and everything else. Andyeah, and they also said that
you know, it hasn't hurt theone dollar margharitas and everything else, that
they're still doing that stuff. Andso you know, especially when you're twenty

(01:38:28):
one years old and you're broke andyou'll go somewhere for a dollar margharita.
Of course, you know five orfive or five um, but uh,
I mean I haven't been doing Applebee'sand forever years. I don't know where
one is. Yeah, and whatare they what are they known? I
mean they're known for the drinks,but like from a food standpoint, like
what are they known for? Yeah? The last time baby back. Yeah,

(01:38:55):
I always got those two confused.I thought, I think I recently
went to an Applebe's, but Ithink it was a chili very similar.
Now I'm confused if the last oneI went to was Applebe's or chili.
But whatever I went to the seawas duct taped. Well, there's an

(01:39:18):
Arby's restaurant in Louisiana where they founda body in a freezer. Oh no,
thoughtful yepart employee walked inside the restaurant'sfreezer discovered a lifeless body woman.
Not knowing how long the woman wasin the freezer, but the investigators believe
it was an accident. Oh oh, one of those we got the feeds.

(01:39:40):
Yeah, she was there time tracks. Yeah yeah. Well but see,
those freezers should have emergency openings becausepeople are supposed to push yeah,
a push button. She had aheart attack, and this is all just
a big miss understanding. Probably probablythe on chili, now kidding. Oh,

(01:40:01):
put her in the chill as ofthe lunch ladies to do with like
the leftover hamburgers and uh you know, like yeah, the sloppy Joe's and
stuff like that. The next thingyou know, they would be of course,
but I mean waste chili. Agreewith Sea Bass this something probably happened
to her. Well, yeah,it's not smarts. The good Bait headline
is body found in freezer at Arby, Yeah, which I mean, yeah,

(01:40:25):
it makes a lot of sense.I believe it. You clicked on
it. Yeah, just frozen.Yeah, you know anight, the investigators,
you all know their roast beef issliced fresh off the bone. And
they have the meats. They havethe meats they got actually meats. No,

(01:41:01):
that's I was thinking. The Fridayturn up the Woody Show. We've
ment to the end of another week, in the beginning of another weekend.
Yeah, this is really like thestarting gun weekend. It is DJ Scotty
Fox in the mix for your Fridayturn up. We are the Woody Show,

(01:41:24):
Woody, Braby, Gray, Menace, Feedback, Sammy, the gangs
all here. Get the weekend going. Your Friday check ins on the text
then those over to two two nineeight seven. Tell us who you are,
we're around the area. You're listeningto the Woody Show. What you
got going on this weekend? Anythinganyone you'd like to have us mentioned When
we get to those check in whateverit is there, maybe you're on social

(01:41:45):
media, you can check in onTwitter and Instagram at the Woody Show,
but the hashtag Friday turn up ormaybe just maybe you're listening to all ninety
eight seven long distance on the iHeartRadio app. Yeah, maybe you don't
know. Well, I'm sure youknow you know where you're at, right,
Yeah, maybe that turn up startedreally early. Really, Craig gorgis

(01:42:06):
keeping track of all those Scottie FoxCream Light ready to go, the weekend,
Friday turn Up, all down theeighty seven, all my friends.
They're different people and it's just likethe ocean in a storm when we go
out. Yeah, we have alegen coursing through our body. Still were

(01:42:28):
one. And why I'm is somea good thing? Baby, It's so
rare even fall in love. Sowhen you give that look to me,
I better look back and believe becausethis is trouble. Yeah, this is
trouble. She caught me food food. I'm scared now. I had sailing

(01:42:58):
dangerous set the step with the fair, step with the fan, step with

(01:43:28):
the f we don't want to die, the friend inner cool with the Woody
Show, Fanta stoody for us.Go ahead, as you waste your days

(01:44:02):
lay thing can when you fall everyonesands not a day and you had your
feel love saying ken with the lightand videos shaking for Sam's ament. When

(01:44:24):
you gotta keep this job belong,No, Belah, I can't hell you
too, even when your little bassdown below just to make it room belongs.

(01:44:45):
The Friday turn up, Yes,the weekend is here. The crew
check in on the text over twotwo nine e seven just got this one.
Hey, what a show. I'mgonna work now, looking forward to
getting out of here to I thoughtyou should know. I worked in the
courthouse. I signed for a packagegoing to Department L sixty nine. How

(01:45:06):
I really love it? I saidto myself sixty nine, Yeah you did
with that tax two two nine eightyseven. Nights I stay some nights.
I call some nights how West inbuilding Castle some night time we stayed as

(01:45:28):
fall. But I still ain't upback to what I stand for? What
do I stand for? What doI stand for? I don't know any
more? So what is your nn The fighting turn up is so great?

(01:46:51):
Great love God to breast, sheso sound shirt to you. I

(01:47:45):
turn back till dat all right,seven bloody show Friday turn Up. I

(01:48:13):
mean show, Hans who was excitedthis the weekend is here? Your check
ins on the text over to twoto nine eight seven. Everyone, Oh,
good morning, morning show. Kylefrom Paramount, who checks in with
us quite off love Anthony working inOntario, just welding it up to uh,
the show, welding it up tothe show. Oh, he's welding
while listening to the show. Weldingit up. Okay, be careful.

(01:48:38):
I love you, Zaddi. Greg, Oh, he love Poppy. Thank
you. You have an admirer,Grege Friday Body Show. Let's go there,
you go, Yes, Let's go. You love Hoy from Robert in
Los Angeles. Robert, I gotsome folks. Check it in on social
media? What's up to Heather Mataio, Olivia, Sophia, Eli, Zoey,

(01:48:58):
hank Esther, Louis See, Jade, Sarah, Ethan, Samantha,
Mike and Tommy hashtag Friday turn upat the only show on Twitter and Instaga
and it's off. A social orattack started two two nine eight seven and
this only show Friday turn up.The angel from My Nightmare, the shadow

(01:49:18):
in the background of the more beunsuspected victim of darkness in the value be
condit like Jack and Sally. Ifyou want where you can always find me.
You will have Halloween on Christmas,get in the night. We wish
this nevers, we wish this neverurs. Time on me, You're already,

(01:49:41):
love boy, said side My.Yea, miss you mission your time
on me. You're already, loveboy, said side By, Yah,
miss you mis they have to gospelunking, great show that already turn it

(01:50:45):
up myself. We require s Chaseis control, ch chats cha sweet Mr

(01:52:26):
chat Freddy lads, I'm told sometimesand doos and golden, but you will
in my mind remember cinsure. Ijust want to say, is all you
will take? Well, don't tellhim hester remember cisur. All right,

(01:53:45):
there's the handiwork of J. ScottyFox. First of all, handy.
It's a good way to start theweekend too. Had a little on air
party officially welcome it in you onthe text over to two two nine eight
seven from the eight one eighth morningto my favorite people, Happy Friday.
No names. Many times were sayinginclude your name please. Jacob and Anaheim

(01:54:09):
going to Lazy Dog on a date. Everybody maybe suggest to Candy Bacon yea
may I suggest that country fried chickensalad with those blue corn crutons. So
good. Three two three, Fridayafternoon. I'm getting off work today and
I'm on my way to go buysome Michelada's cheers. That's from Sarah.

(01:54:32):
We got Miguel from Newport Beach.He's checking in from the seven one four,
and we go to Greg Gory,who's got the long distance check ins
there on the iHeartRadio app. Yougot Matt checking in from San Diego.
You guys know Andrea Andrea here?Oh yeah. She starts every text of
the show with Andrea here and Andreashere in good Year, Arizona, actually

(01:54:54):
in Nashville, Mike and Boise,Idaho. What's up to? Patti and
Star Idaho? Got Ron and SaintLouis chris See in Pismo Beach, California.
And Paul from my birth city ofQueens, New York, n I
will how about one more time forDJ Scotty Fox Brillion once again doing a
great job for us here. Yeah, we got the continuation of two hours

(01:55:16):
a commercial for you all ninety eightseven music. It's already begun the morning
music marathon. If you're thinking aboutus over the weekend. We want to
leave us a message eight seven sevenforty four Woody for the after hours voicemail
or to leave us a drunk dialvoicemail. Whatever you need from us First
Compression Hotline eight seven seven to fortyfour Woody. Thank you so much for
giving the Woody Show some of yourvaluable time this week, but we'd love

(01:55:38):
it to appreciate you for that.The rest of you guys can suck it
and we'll catch you back here onMonday. Have a great weekend. SMD
doublem Bye. Have look great Friday. You mother,