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December 7, 2022 26 mins

Welcome to Unbreakable! A mental health podcast hosted by Fox NFL Insider Jay Glazer. On today's episode, former Marine Sergeant Kirstie Ennis joins Jay for an incredible interview. Her story may have begun when she lost her leg after her helicopter went down in Afghanistan, but it certainly doesn't end there. After more than 40 surgeries, Kristie has accomplished more on one leg than most people have achieved in their lifetimes.  

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Episode Transcript

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Speaker 1 (00:02):
This is Unbreakable with Jay Glazer, a mental health podcast
helping you out of the gray and into the blue.
Now here's Jay Glazer. Welcome and gain to another edition
of Unbreakable and mental health podcast with Jay Glazer. I'm
Jay Glazer, and there is a few times in life

(00:23):
that I've come across someone. With the very first interaction,
that person changed my life. And I'm proud to have
become friends with this person first, the best friends with
this person. That a brother to this person, and man,
I'm so excited for everybody here to meet this magical
human being. She is, like I said, a sister to me.
She's someone who actually asked me permission to take her

(00:46):
own life one day, which thankfully I said, No, it's
not a question you get asked too often in life,
but this happens. So with that, I'm gonna bring in
the one and only Sergeant Staff Sergeant Kirsty Ennis, who
is the rock star of all rock star and folks,
get ready because your life is about to change. Hey
doing Kat, I'm doing well. Thanks for having me. J Absolutely,

(01:06):
I've introduced you a lot of times before and it's
I've said it's a million times. People like you've just
you round Kirsty and look. So Kirsty and I met
many many years ago. She came into m v P
and that day I'm like, oh my god, this girl
is just different. So real quick before we get into it. Well,
actually there was no real quick. Okay, introduced everybody who
you are. So I joined the Marine Corps at seventeen

(01:28):
years old, UM and lied through my teeth to get
my parents to sign the paperwork. UM ended up being
an aerial doorgunner UM a fifty three platform for six
years in the United States. Wait wait, wait, wait, wait,
wait wait wait one of two female door gunners and
the Marines. Is that correct at the time? Yes, I
don't know what the stats are now, so right, Okay,
So sometimes I have to stop Kirsty as you here,
because she'll just go through ship like it's just just

(01:50):
a normal Tuesday, and it's not a normal fucking Tuesday.
But go ahead, kay, So one of two female doorgunners
the entire fucking Marines. Go ahead. I probably myself very
much shown my combat action wings Wings with three gold
stars and my combat meritorious promotions. But on my last
employment to Afghanistan, my helicopter went down, and as a
result of that crash, I sustained some pretty severe injuries,
everything from traumatic brain injury, damage to my spine, my arms,

(02:15):
my ears, my eyes, and then I'm actually sitting in
my wheel chair right now. I lost my left leg
above the knee pretty high, and the Marine cort ended
up forcing me into a medical retirement. And it was
the last thing that I wanted to happen. And at
that point in time, you know, joining the Marine Corps
seventeen years old and giving six years to it, that
was all I knew. Like I blooed green, like that
was my passion, that was my purpose, that was my life.
Um So when I was forced into that medical retirement,

(02:37):
I felt like my whole world was just like pulled
out from underneath me. So I really struggled mentally and
emotionally with figuring out who I was going to be again,
you know, what was what was going to be my identity.
So I ended up turning to the outdoors, fell in
love with snowboarding. Injuries and you just went through this, yet,
how many vertebrates did you crush? My C two, C

(02:58):
three and C four? So three right your face just
located and went through your neck, which Kirsty loves to
show pictures up I do. Yeah, I know. I could
actually fit my fist through my face. Um, like lost
the jaw, all of my teeth shattered. Yeah, I mean
it was, it was. It was brutal. And I'm actually
very very fortunate and grateful that I'm still here today

(03:19):
because I shouldn't be. You know, I was pronounced dead
on impact when the helicopter went down. Um and so yeah, so,
by the grace of God, I am still here. Like
I said, I struggled though, um in a lot of ways.
So now you've got so we have all these cresh vertebrates,
Your face dislocated, went through your neck, You have lost
your left leg. Okay, since then, what have you done? Well?

(03:42):
I do more now on one leg than I ever
even dreamed of doing that too. Um, I have three masters.
I am so close to being done with my doctorate.
I'm a firefighter, I'm a pilot with all with one leg.
Gone on to you compete at the national and international
level and snowboardings to board across some banks. Song, I
want a couple of businesses and yeah, but climbing the
tallest mountains in the world and snow wearing them down.
How many highest peaks the world have you have you

(04:04):
summit it? So I've actually been on all seven continents,
so did all of those but Everest. That you have
to have a redemption round on Everest in April, in
May three and then I'll be done with my seven
Summits initiative. Oh, you'll be done good. I love Kirstie.
I fucking hate when she does these because she's on
one leg and she's going up Everest, which people with

(04:25):
two legs die all the time. And you know, I
just worry about her because she's my sister, and and
she gets real ornery with me, and you know, because
I look, I'm very supportive of her dreams, but I
want her around for a while. So explain everybody what
happened to the top of Everest. So I actually um
so in two thousand nineteen was my first Everest attempt,
and um I did not climate the traditional way. I

(04:47):
actually spent a month above twenty thou feet, which is
very admimal. It actually might be again this world record. Um.
But long story short, we made it to about six
feet from the summit, and my two climbing partners ran
out of oxygen, and my shirt became my to me
and said that, you know, I had the option to
continue going, but I didn't see the point in it.
You know, I didn't see the point in summiting without
my team, Like there are so many things that are

(05:07):
more important, um than our own personal successes, and um, yeah,
I didn't want to stand on top of Everest without
my two guys, without my climbing partners. So I made
the call to turn around. It was a very difficult one,
but in my heart of hearts, I know that it
was the right one. I wouldn't be able to live
with myself if I got somebody else hurt or something
happened to them. Um. So I definitely decided to shift
my perspective on all of it. And now I just

(05:27):
told myself that I left a piece of my heart
over on Everest and I have to go back for it.
To really stress you out, Jay, So last time I
was out there for last last time, I was out
there for two months. But this time I'm actually doing
a speed ascent. So I will get to Catamando on
April three. I'll get out to the Komboo region I'll
summit lot See, then sleep on sleep on the summit
of lot See, and then go straight into um an

(05:50):
everest push, which is pretty unheard of. But I'll be back.
Combine three. Why why are you deciding to stress me
even more? Um? Well, for my own sake? Really? Your body,
well well your body just like deteriorates so much out there.
And if I can speed climb, then you know, I

(06:10):
want to find a team who can speed climbed with me.
Like I don't want to spend a bunch of my time,
energy and effort resources even you know, out there um
sitting in a tent for a month, Like, if we
can knock it out, let's get it done and get
back home and love on my family and friends. So
what about all this that happened that gets you? And
when wasn't you made the decision say I'm gonna do
more with one leg than I ever would have with two.

(06:32):
So on the one year anniversary of my helicopter crashing,
which would have been June thirteen, um, I decided that
I was going to take my own life. I was
gonna walk into the Colorado River in Lithe, California, and again,
for for whatever reason, I was spared again, and my
dad came to me in the hospital and he said,
you've got to be shipping me. You know, the enemy
couldn't kill you, and now you're gonna do it for them.

(06:54):
And that was kind of that tough love and suffer
pump like sucker punch that I really needed um to
be able to continue forcing myself at one foot in
front of the other. And I decided that if I
couldn't like show up or live for myself anymore, then
I needed to show up and live with the people
around me, you know, the men and the women who
never made at home, my teammates, family friends, so on
and so forth. And that was a pivotal moment. And
don't get me wrong, like like you mentioned, Jay, there's

(07:15):
been plenty of other times where I have been in
very serious, you know, bouts of depression and like I said,
struggling and suffering through a lot of the emotional stuff.
But we're here and we're and we're still doing it.
We're figuring it out together. But there's a difference of
your dad saying, hey, you're gonna stay alive, and in
a difference of you saying I'm gonna go become the
fifth rank snowboard in the world. I'm gonna summit the

(07:36):
seventh summits. I'm gonna be a firefighter with one leg.
I'm gonna do all this. You know, when did you
kind of or just what happened to get you to
say I'm gonna have mental wealth instid of struggle with
mental health, I think I got to a point where
I could actually figure out how to harness pain and
to lean into my community. Like I get I get
told time and time again that I'm a strong one,
but there's nothing about Kirsty that's really that strong. Like

(07:58):
I pulled strength to the people around me, and so
once I really had like that team and that family
in that community rallying behind me and believing in me
even when I didn't want to believe in myself, I
feel like that's what really changed things for me. You know.
I joined the Marine Corps to serve people, and so
now when I have all of these other people showing
up for me and rallying for my dreams, you know,
it gets very hard to let them down. You know,

(08:19):
it's always about like who's watching. Obviously don't have kids
in my own or anything like that. But you know,
I didn't have a role model that I needed or
wanted when I was in the hospital, Like I want
to be that person for others, the inspiration and the hope,
motivation or I said, I'm just very very grateful that
I've had so many people show up for me. I
want to show up brothers. So you see, Kirsty, Kirsty
is one of the most beautiful women on the planet.

(08:40):
And it's striking when you see this beautiful woman walking
and she has a prosthetic leg and the number of
kids that walk up and point and go look, and
you're always so gracious to them. When at what point
did you say, hey, okay, I could use this for
good and change it from I don't want people looking
at me. So they were is um I did a

(09:01):
thousand mile walk back in what would have been September
November of two fifteen. Um I end up walking a
thousand miles across one Stoutland and Wales, and it was
for raise awareness for you know, men and women who
either never made at home from the war or they
took your own life. Yeah yeah, yeah, he was there too,
But that's that's beside of this is get down placed everything,

(09:23):
but yeah, um, but yeah, Like mile five hundred, a
little boy with hearing aids came up to me and
he was like, I'm just like you. And at first
I had no for conclude what he was talking about.
I was like, this is not correlate whatsoever. But when
I stopped in my thought about it, I was like,
you absolutely are. You're different and you can go on
and do whatever you want. It may not look the

(09:44):
same as everybody else, but you can go forth and yeah,
you can change the world. You can improve the world.
J But then at mile six fifty, a little girl
with braces on her legs came out to me and said,
I'm just just like you, And like that was the
moment that it clicked. Wow, I've never don't you know,
we've been best friends for a long time. I've never
asked you that I ever knew that. There is so

(10:06):
much that's pretty, that's that's incredible. So I want to
go back now. You hear how bubbly Kirsty is, But
there's a lot of darkness. There's a lot of pain.
I've been there for you for a lot about pain
and funk, I can't blame how many surgeries have you
had forty eight surgeries. How many amputations of your your
left leg? Jeez, the last one would have been five, right,

(10:27):
so far? So they keep going up. So Kirsty one
night was it was your fourth amputation. I am hosting
the UFC, the very first ever UFC at Madison Square
Garden in New York, the very first one. And Kirsty
text me and she's like, I'm done. I'm asking permission
to go to take her own life. And this is
not a normal text to get, especially what why You're

(10:48):
in the middle of hosting the UFC at Madison Square Garden.
And I was like, no, I'm not I'm not agreeing
to this. Like there's gonna be too much good you're
gonna do in the war, all them You're gonna be
a service to too many people. And man, that was
just a moment. I'll never forget my life. Kate. Well, no,
I just appreciate you being there, because again, like how

(11:09):
did you I don't want to cry, but but how
did you ignored me? Or have you let that go
for a little while? Like who knows where I would
be today if i'd even be here? Um, and I
guess that's what I mean. By people showing up for
one another, like ask people how they're doing, and truly
mean it, like be genuinely curious as to how they're
doing and figure out ways to make their life a
little bit better too. Um, I like, I firmly believe

(11:31):
that we're not put on this earth just to live
for ourselves. Like we are social beings. We need each other.
And so yeah, so you showing up for me. You know,
the guys and gals from m VP are are unbreakable
family everybody. Um, Like, it was huge because I couldn't
have done it on my own. But thinking how many
people you've saved since then, I don't have to saved
people of people. You have saved a lot of your stories,

(11:54):
saved a lot of people your story. I'm sure there
are other people are gonna take their lives and heard
your story and did not. I'm sure that you've gotten
other people to use what makes them different to empower
them and to inspire them and to improve the world
instead of just you know, saying okay, I'm tapping out.
So No, you've saved, you've you've helped, you've lifted, you've empowered.

(12:15):
Thank god, we have that conversation thank God you're still here,
and I think your work is just starting. I do too, actually,
I really do. But you know, there are there are
days that I wake up and I missed the Marine
Corps so much. You know, I had really terrible, shitty
things not happened to me. Like I wouldn't be where
I am today. You know, I wouldn't have a very
unique platform. I wouldn't be able to help people in

(12:36):
the same capacity that I do now. So yeah, so gosh.
I mean, this is sitting in the wheel chair again,
like this is a curse that I would not wish
my own worst enemy whatsoever. Um. But at the end
of the day, like I count my blessings like I
don't have to do anything anymore. I get to do them,
you know. Yeah, A very difficult path led me to
a lot of great things. Why are you in your
wheelchair right now? Because my legs beat up from the

(12:56):
surgery still um, romping around in fire gear, bunker gear
and uh, experimenting with prosthetics again for usual. Tell me
what you're doing with the fire department. So right now
I'm in fire academy. UM, so I'm a firefighter one
UM volunteer, structural firefighter. Um. And I actually just finished
my wild land courses. Um. But don't stress out, Jay, Like,

(13:18):
that's not my endgame. So right now I'm also in
in flight school. There's so much to cut you up.
I don't know if already been into a podcast, but yeah, no,
I want to be an aerial firefighter. So right now
I'm in flight school. Um. And for me to be
able to do my job well from the sky, and
it's just like the Marine Corps, like I have to

(13:39):
understand what the guys and gals on the ground are doing,
um and have the utmost respect for what they do
so that way I can protect them. Yeah, so learning
all the ends and outs. I'm actually going to MS
school like semester to figure that part out too. So
I'm gonna get a little deeper with you. I'm probably
gonna cry. I'm trying not to hear. But I've never
asked you this. Kirsty has seen me at my darkest also, right,

(14:01):
you see me at my worst, at my darkest. Why
have you always been there for me when I have
not been there for myself? Did your worth it? I
think I think there's like now I'm starting and I think, um,
I think it's so easy to forget like our own self,
like our self worth and our own value. But there
are so many outside people like that are watching you,

(14:22):
danad out and they see all of the great things,
um and I think that's what makes life so special
as you work through the hard stuff together. I never
gave up on you. You never gave up on me.
And again, I think that's what it's all about, is
just showing up like I know who you are at
your core. I'm will understand by your side through all
the thick, nasty, dark, deep stuff. There's been a lot.
There's been a lot on both you know. It's like

(14:44):
I said, and listen, I come on here and I'm
on one version of Jay Glazer on here because I'm hosting.
But the reason why I get to hostess get too,
as you say, hosts this podcast, it's because I've been
through the ship and the darkness and that gray and
we talk about but often we hide it. With Kirsty,
I haven't hit it ever. And that's probably one of
the biggest gifts you've ever given me, is I can

(15:06):
be safe and have these miltdowns to you and you're
still there and I and I know You're still gonna
be there always. When I think there's there's so much
power and being vulnerable, it takes a lot of courage
to talk about some of the things and be open
and honest with us and the things that you have
been with me, and on a public platform, especially so
you've also seen You've seen a lot of people take
advantage of me. You've seen a lot of people. You know,

(15:28):
I give my heart to everybody because being of service
is one of the things that gets me through the
gray and a lot of times from the service to
the wrong people, and a lot of times Kirstie will
warn me of that, you know. Um. But at the
same time, like I've seen you go through some dark, dark,
dark periods. You had a shift probably the last you know,
two years or show where you know, I was always

(15:50):
worried about you, and now I'm not worried about you
because you're just those dark spells kind of go quicker
than they have. Do you know what it was is
I think you were operating more in the grade than
certainly than you are now. Well, I think just like
figuring out what my releases were going to be. You know,
I'm not the best with words all the time, I'm

(16:11):
awful about picking up the phone to actually call somebody
and talk for an hour and a half or any
of that. But like figuring out like the physical release.
I mean, I'm breakable and m v P again, you
guys taught me so much of like going out there
doing something straining us and then pouring your heart out.
Like I think that that was a huge like turning
point for me. But then also like being patient with myself, um,

(16:32):
carving out time for me to love on myself and
to sit with my emotions, because stending with your emotions
is miserable, um, but I think it's so crucial for
so many of us. And yeah, I kind of started
leaning into meditating rate after probably right after you moved
away from l A. And again, that's that's a hard
thing to do, like sit in silence and really sit
with your own thoughts and try to push all the
block everything else out like the chaos. Um. I mean,

(16:55):
I mean, I guess those are just practices, but those
really did like adding those into my routine. I mean
it's a game changer. I mean I'm still rolling, I'm
still doing jiu jitsu and m m A and like
there's a lot of anger and aggression in here that
like has to be lit out before I can really
feel I talked first, you had to kick again. She's
on one leg, and I swear to you, I got
the video. It's on my Instagram, you have it in yours.

(17:17):
I swear to you. She kicked better with better form
on one leg than some of the pro fighters that
we've had over the years. And my reaction was just like,
are you fucking kidding me? You and curse. She's just
laughed it off like this, like, just do a perfecting
side kick, No problem, It's it's okay, no problem. It
was just it was it's it's it's unbelieved. Like I've

(17:38):
always said, I know what you've done, but I don't
know what the funk you can't do. And you know,
I always say, let's walk this walk together, you and
I and I'm just you know, and and again you
keep pushing and pushing and pushing. Do you ever see
a time where it's gonna be enough? Or are you
gonna push until you're just you put yourself over the edge. Um? Well, yeah,
I mean you know me, Um, I will probably like

(18:00):
there is no threshold really, And I think as long
as I'm you know, relearning everything as an amputee and
just like ways of life. Yeah, I'm going to find
every challenge out there that I can, you know that
I can tackle. I do think that I'm like genuinely
a curious person and I like learning and I like
figuring things out because I don't mind doing things the
hard way if it means I'm going to set somebody

(18:20):
else up later on down the road for their success,
like make it easier for other people to do the
things that I'm doing. I mean the harsh reality though,
is like in ten years everything is going to start
to hurt a lot more. So I just have to
figure out a different way to help people. How about
we pick up chess? No, you think I have the
attention standard chesty seconds something that's not going to kill you.

(18:42):
How about we pick up when when you are climbing mountains?
What is the hardest part of having one leg? Like,
I'm sure there's a lot, but what's the hardest what's
most frustrating? Country there's obviously like the pain factor. I mean,
you know, I'm never going to be biomechanically correct. My
body works entirely different than everybody else is out there there. Um,
but my thing is, like I compare myself to those people,

(19:03):
and that's so frustrating and that's a terrible headspace to
be in. So being able to can like can contend
you convincing myself to put one ft in front of
the other. Like that's like, that's the hardest part. Like
you know, you and I talked about it all the time.
If you keep your head in your heart in the
right place, you can overcome anything physically. And to be
a good mountaineer you just have to be strong, sebored

(19:25):
and stupid. You have to forget how bad it sucks
and day in and day out and keep moving. But
I think that's the hardest part and probably one of
the biggest things that I like about mountaineering, because it
truly is more of a mental and emotional task that
anything physically. Why do you compare yourself to everybody else?
You're different, that's the whole point. You ain't like everybody else.
You're different. Hey, you're out there for a long time.
But why would you Why would you all people compare

(19:47):
yourself to anybody else. They're all looking at you going,
holy sh it. The girl with the one leg is.
You know, she's a thousand meters above us. Believe it
or not, JA, I guess I am human well and
actually I'll rephrase that too. May not be comparing myself
to others, but comparing myself to my old self. Like
if I had two legs would be faster, I had

(20:07):
two legs would be stronger. You know why I still
do it? Well? No, that's why you check yourself. You
figure out how to like yeah, you mean you create
again practices and figure out how to shift your perspective.
I mean, like I said, there are times that I bitch, moaning,
complain all day long out there, but it makes it
that much more worth it. When I reached the summit,

(20:28):
maybe the most beautiful moment, one of the most beautiful
moments of your life, because you have been blessed with
where you are now. Mm yeah, I think it came
up and said something. Yeah, you know, social media is
a blessing and a curse again, like it's something that
I try to distance myself from. I think that it
can also be like very unhealthy practice tool whatever you

(20:50):
wanna call it, um, But it has also connected me
to some really amazing kids, Like there are little kids
that I write letters to and send them like pictures
of Everest. There's the little girls that I send you know,
the Barbie dolls to when they're in the hospital. And
like some of these little kids have are now like
you know, I've been alongside them for all of their recoveries,
whether they're battling cancer or they lost a limb by
some kind of trauma whatever. It is, Like social media

(21:12):
really connected me with these people in these families, and
it's exactly who and where I want to be. Like
I said, you know, I want to be able to
help the next generation. Um, you know people like me
and her name's Ruby is one of them. But yeah,
you asked me one time because I told you going
to agree to suicide, but you asked me, if it
ever gets to where your leg goes up, where they

(21:33):
have to remove your hip, that I would agree to
let you go. Are you still in that same mindset
or could we get you past that? Do you want
the honest true? I don't know. Um, I really don't know.
If they came to me and said that we're going
to take the rest of your fam or you're going
to be a hip just our tip, um, that would
be a tough one because when they try to take

(21:54):
it before, like that was like I can still hear
myself screaming when I was telling the doctors not wake
me up again. Um, and I still very much so.
I believe and feel that way. Like life isn't easy.
You don't get me wrong. I go for it and
I can do some great things. I've been all over
the world and have helped tons of people. Um, but
nothing about my life right now is is easy. Um.

(22:14):
You know, if I lost more of my leg, it
would be a game changer. Even if I lost another
inch of my leg, it would be huge. I'm still
not agreeing to that. Though you said agree to that.
I'm not agree to another inch of your leg. And
you know what people don't know to you still have
the like the nerve right so you're like I've seen
her in Kirstie spent a lot of times. She stays
in my house a lot and she'll almost try and

(22:35):
scratch her foot that's not there. Yeah, it kills me
to see it kills me. You know, It's just it's
that has got to be Do you ever get used
to that? No? No, I still like bend down to
put like a sock on you know, my left foot
that's not there. Um, so all who try and get
up and you know, get out of bed and I'll

(22:56):
take a step with a left leg that's not there
and next thing you know, you're on the ground. Um yeah, No,
I mean the minds of a wild thing. Um yeah,
I mean, now now that we're talking about it, you
know now that it's like on my conscious like, yeah,
I'm moving my toes that aren't there when it made
me feel shitty, appreciate it. Kursy and I cry a

(23:18):
lot and we laugh a lot together as well. And
what you can see and we have to and she
just gang you. You know who my circle is. You've
seen it. I mean, it's a ridiculous circle. But honestly,
nobody listening me up more than this girl. This girl
just being around her, she just changes my life. She
changes my mood. She just she is. She's a game changer.
You know. Roger Goodell, the Roger Goodell. One time we're

(23:39):
an MVP session and he fucking pulls curse the aside
and he says, oh my god, you're gonna change the world.
She goes, Nope, we're gonna improve it. Like who the
fox says things like this, She's like out of a movie.
Was unbelievable. Like the things that just come out of
this girl's mouth, they are incredible. And she changes. You know,
you've changed my life, You've changed other people's lives. You
have improved the world. Before I let you go, and

(24:01):
that's all my guests, give me your unbreakable moment. And
you've had a lot and and you may have already
mentioned it, you know, but something that could have broken
you should have broken you and didn't. You came through
the other side of that tunnel. So it's actually the
story behind my die living tattoo on my wrist um.
During one of my climbs on in Indonesia brutal, it
was a seventy mile track in it was awful conditions.

(24:24):
We're talking blizzard. It's a sixteen thousand foot rock face
where this rock is just shredding every piece of gear
that we have. Ropes are popping and breaking. You have
to go across these things called tyroleum traverses, which are
basically just like steel cables that you have to walk
on like shim me across to be able to bridge
a gap. And um I summit and but I'm moving slow. Um,

(24:44):
the two local tribes ransacked my base camp. So I'm
standing on top of this rock face looking down realizing
that I have nowhere to go, like there's no yeah,
they destroyed everything. Yeah. So like I'm already his heart
and I'm stoked when I summoned, but I'm looking down.
I'm like, I don't even want to go back down
and deal with this mess. And I just started to

(25:07):
legitimately panic, you know, I started to cry, I started
to get cold, my hands weren't working, and snowing, it's
obviously freezing. I'm soaking wet. And my camera guy actually
came to me before this huge long repel section and
he was like, you know, you need to get your
ship together because this is where everyone dies. Yeah, and
like yeah, oh yeah, I know. There's plaques everywhere. And
so in that moment, like I felt everything all at once.

(25:31):
You know, I make the joke that you know I
found Jesus, but like everything everything from fear to pride
to you m heartbreak, heartache, love for my family, missing
my family, not even knowing if I was going to
go home to my family, and it was just like
in that moment I was like, this is what it
is like, this is like what it feels like to
be alive. And so that's why my arm says die
living and I didn't. I'm so glad you never told

(25:55):
me this story before, never cling again. Oh my god, unbelievable.
Krist Yeah, baby doll. I appreciate you joining me. You know,
you're one of my my You're you're not just the
best friend, your sister to me and you know prompt
to always said that we walked this walk together and

(26:16):
I always will and more than anything, I'll always get
your back. Thank you, Jay now, and I'm right here
with you, right here behind you always. I love you.
I love you too, baby doll.

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