July 22, 2023 • 31 mins
Ben Maller & his 5th Hour home-skillet Danny G. have Saturday fun for you! They're talking: The Ninja of the Night, Running Out of Luck, Text to the Bullpen, Phrase of the Week, Back Scratcher, & more!
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Kabooms.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
If you thought four hours a day, twelve hundred minutes
a week was enough, think again. He's the last remnants
of the old republic, a sol fashion of fairness. He
treats crackheads in the ghetto gutter the same as the
rich pill poppers in the penthouse.
Speaker 1 (00:18):
Wow.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
The Clearinghouse of Hot takes break free for something special.
The Fifth Hour with Ben Maller starts right now.
Speaker 1 (00:29):
In the air everywhere, back at it. The podcast dojo
is open for business. The Fifth Hour with Ben Mahler
and Danny G. We thank you for hanging out with
us on the weekend. Tremendous, tremendous job by you, downloading, subscribing,
(00:50):
listening to this podcast. We think you think you. Thank
you and Danny G. We also think Omar vs. Scale
the old baseball player from the Cleveland Indians and the
Seattle Mariners, a bunch of other teams who came on
yesterday for some stimulating old school baseball talk.
Speaker 3 (01:08):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (01:09):
I like it when my baseball card collection comes to
life on the radio.
Speaker 3 (01:14):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (01:14):
I was talking to a friend of mine. I was
actually texting a friend of mine. I was like, we
have had the weirdest collection on this podcast of former
athletes that have popped up. It's so random, Danny. Over
the years, now you've been with me a while, but
over the years we've had, among others, Lenny Dykstra, We've
had the great Tommy John Omarvis Scale has been out
(01:39):
of that list. We've had a few other athletes like
random athletes. And for some reason it must be an
age thing. I love talking to random old baseball players
in particular, there's something and basketball players too, but it's
like going back in time and catching up with some
of these cats as they are now just out of
sports and they're just living there lives and all that stuff.
(02:01):
There's something about that.
Speaker 4 (02:02):
Coaches though, need to be Hall of Fame status, like
Tick Vermeil and who else.
Speaker 1 (02:10):
Brian Billick, Brian Billick, Brian Billock, Well, that Billock. That
was the that was the big one, the Billick one.
I mean, it's almost like I didn't hear it when
he was on. It was it was wild. So we
have this week on or today, I should say it
this week just today on the podcast. We had almar
of Asco yesterday today on the menu. If we get
(02:31):
to all this, we might save some of it for
the Sunday podcast. We'll see it goes. But we have
the Ninja of the Night, running out of Luck, and
the text to the Bullpen. We also have backscratcher Phrase
of the Week, and we'll see what else we have
time for. So this being the Saturday podcast, The Life
of Malord, the Life of Danny G and a global
(02:53):
podcast exclusive, I have saved as sordid tale, a hum
dinger of a story for this podcast. Now. I have
not told this story on radio. I've not told this
story anywhere. There's only a few people that know this.
In fact, Danny G, you do not even know the
story I'm about to tell. You are completely unaware of
(03:16):
where we are going right now, and I would like
you to buckle up, Danny. This is going to be wild.
It's going to be crazy.
Speaker 3 (03:24):
I'm going to have Marcel tweeked this out on the
FSR and count what well.
Speaker 1 (03:28):
Marcel is the guy that broke the Titanic crash story.
He was ahead of his time. So, as Paul Harvey
would say, back in the day, you know what the
news is, but in the next few minutes you're going
to hear the rest of the story. So this week,
I did something in my life that I've never done
before and I hope to never do again. Danny, And
(03:51):
what is that, you asked, Well, this is the beginning
of the tale. So we go back to the Sunday night,
Monday morning overnight show start of the week. Through the show,
It's early in the morning. I cruise home. I went
to change into my gym shoes to visit my friend
(04:11):
named Treadmill. And it was dark. It's late night overnight.
It was dark. I had driven a long distance. I
was tired from the FSR Mothership to the north Woods.
The chair that I normally sit on to change into
my my my gym stuff right kind of near the
(04:33):
front door. And you've been over to the house, Danny,
you kind of know the setup there. So I look
over to where I normally sit and it's kind of
dark and all that, and I see there's a couple
of katanas that have been placed on it, and I'm like, well,
what's up with that? You know that's where I sit,
(04:54):
you know. So now, if you're uneducated, I think most
people know what a katana is, but if you're not
familiarliar with that. It is a Japanese sword, which it's
the curved, single edged blade with it's it's got a
very large grip on it to accommodate two hands, just
(05:16):
like a ninja, like a Ninja of the night would have.
Speaker 3 (05:18):
This, right seeing those on pond Stars.
Speaker 1 (05:21):
Yeah, exactly, exactly. So, so there are two of these
katanas that are right where I need to be, where
my big fat ass needs to be so it can
be a little less fat, and I need to change
it into my gym class. So okay, so I'm like,
all right, whatever. You know, most people here call them
ninja swords. If they don't call them katanas, they call
(05:42):
ninja ninja swords. So these were placed here, not by
my wife, but by another member of the household here, Danny,
you're very familiar with that person who shall be left
nameless for the purposes of this podcast. To protect the guilty.
(06:04):
So I grab these katanas, these ninja swords to move
them so I can sit my ass down to put
the sneakers on. And somehow, while I was in the
process of doing this, one of these ninja swords slid
out of the shield that it was in. Oh no,
(06:25):
a sheef whatever it's called. So it slid out of
that sheaf. It then falls down and slices a chunk
of my right leg. Oh yeah, so mind you there
is Now it's starting to bleed. I'm like, well, maybe
(06:46):
it's not that bad. Maybe it was just a grazing blow.
And it's bleeding there. It starts looking like a crime scene.
I'm withering in pain, I'm screaming profanity and I ended
up being driven to the emergency room by my wife
with a and I end up getting a bunch of
stitches to patch up my right leg. And yeah, the
(07:10):
samurai sword came down. It hit right between my knee
and my foot, closer to my foot, right near the
right ankle. And I was actually lucky it wasn't worth.
It's one of those good news bad news things, Danny,
because the good news is I could have lost a
toe or part of my foot. I didn't, and I
(07:33):
needed the stitches. They'll come out, I think ten to
fourteen days from the time I had them, and I
never made it to the gym. I hit the pause
button on that. Now. The bad news is that's the
good news. The bad news is that I will no longer, Danny,
be able to continue my career as a catwalk leg model.
I will not be able to wear the short skirts
(07:55):
anymore because my leg's pretty chopped up and so, but
I can still walk. I didn't, you know, it's not
it could have been much worse. But I ask you, Danny,
how many people do you think can say they are
such a big, such a big clutch that they ended
up basically stabbing themselves with a ninja sword. I didn't
(08:16):
even missed a show, by the way, I just kept
doing the shows.
Speaker 3 (08:18):
Yeah, Warrior.
Speaker 4 (08:21):
This reminds me of early on in my radio days.
We had a, you know, like one of those danger
boys on our morning show. On this particular morning show,
his name was Squid Boy, who he would do all
the dumb stunts on the morning show and he was
the butt of a lot of jokes. He was pretty
pretty funny character on our show. And he came in
(08:44):
one morning and he had ninja stars with him. Not
a bagged lunch, not a pair of headphones. No, he
was carrying ninja stars.
Speaker 1 (08:54):
Justink, justin king.
Speaker 4 (08:56):
And when we asked him on the air why he
was carrying those around with him, he said, these are
my practice stars. It was so dead serious, and my
co host said, where are you going to practice today
with the hose? And so that's my first question. Why
(09:17):
were their ninja swords sitting there at your house?
Speaker 1 (09:21):
Well, the the wife had had had gotten these for
the uh, the person we will not name in said
house here as a gift, and apparently they were taken
out to to show off. As I understand it, they
(09:41):
normally are not there due to the resourcefulness of the
person who put them there.
Speaker 4 (09:49):
It's like when we take out our gun collection once
in a while.
Speaker 1 (09:55):
You know, you take out your your different uh bullets
and guns and whatnot and show them up. So, so yeah,
they were That's why they were there. And I go
into the emergency room and they they you know, you
go in there and they're like, what are you here for?
What happened?
Speaker 3 (10:09):
You know?
Speaker 1 (10:09):
And wait, you dropped a ninja sword and it stabbed
you in the leg, Like what are you talking to me?
Speaker 3 (10:16):
That's a good story.
Speaker 4 (10:18):
And by the way, I looked it up and the
sword sheath is called a scabbard.
Speaker 3 (10:24):
A scabbard, you're going to have a scabbard all right?
Speaker 1 (10:28):
Yeah? Well I told my wife, I said, I am
never touching the katana again. That was the last time
I touched the katana. Uh that is it. And I
guess there's an art to picking up these things. And
whatever I did, I don't even really know what I did.
I must have picked them up the wrong way. This
thing came sliding out and bam, slice slice baby.
Speaker 4 (10:50):
Oh you're lucky. Is it sharp enough to where it
could have sliced your foot off?
Speaker 3 (10:56):
Well, I don't.
Speaker 1 (10:57):
I didn't think it was that sharp. I don't deal
with these things. I know they've been in the house
for a while, but I didn't really mess around with
them because it's not my thing. You know. I was
told by my mom not to play with swords when
I was when I was a kid, so I just
like stayed away room. You know, I'm around butter knife, Danny.
I'm a little paranoid. I cook a lot now, I'm
like to cook and the I cook a lot of
the meals on the weekends and stuff, and uh so, yeah,
(11:20):
I get. But I didn't run out of luck, Danny,
because I did end up. I'm gonna be fine. I
have a thing on my leg and all that. And
my wife was giving me a hard time because I
still drove into the studio and She's like, you don't
have to you get the ultimate trump card to get
out of work. You got you know, you stab.
Speaker 4 (11:37):
Yourself with the imagine our boss reading that text message.
Speaker 1 (11:42):
Yeah, hey, Scott, I can't I can't come in tonight
because uh I got stabbed by a katana uh in
the middle of the night, and uh so I hope
that never happens again. It was very painful. You know,
I've not been stabbed. Have you been stabbed before?
Speaker 3 (11:58):
Even?
Speaker 1 (11:58):
I know, it's like it's weirdly because it's stabbing. I
dropped it. I didn't like poke the knife into me,
the blade. But it's still wild, crazy man, the pain,
the agony. But I'm lucky. I didn't run out of
luck to any other people have run out of luck?
Speaker 3 (12:13):
Right? Have you ever played gas Roulette?
Speaker 1 (12:18):
I played Roulette. I don't know. Oh okay, okay, wait
a minute, Oh yeah, yeah, oh yeah, okay, yeah, oh yeah.
Speaker 4 (12:24):
We had the old game of gas roulette where you
are down to twenty miles left for the tank and
the digital readout on your car. You are definitely paying
attention to it, but at the same time you are
risking at all.
Speaker 3 (12:39):
You're like, well, I can't go right now.
Speaker 4 (12:43):
I'm going to have to go right before work, and
so that's exactly what I did Tuesday morning. Now, as
I'm driving to the gas station, I get a call
from my Wifey, and that's not common as I'm on
my way to work. So I pick up my phone
and she says, Hey, guess what. It's our lucky day.
(13:03):
There was some clerical mistake at my job with payroll
and they cut me a check for three hundred dollars,
just some error where her boss told her, you know what,
consider it a gift. The check is already cut.
Speaker 1 (13:19):
Wow.
Speaker 3 (13:20):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (13:22):
Although it's funny because fast forward a few days later,
she gets the check seventy nine dollars after all the
taxes were taken out.
Speaker 1 (13:30):
Ah, that sucks.
Speaker 3 (13:31):
Such crap.
Speaker 4 (13:33):
Welcome to California, ladies and gentlemen. But this is good
to hear because obviously we're watching every dollar right now
as this baby is about to and everything has been expensive,
and obviously the cost of living here where we're at
is insane. I told her, I'm like, man, that's good news.
I'm glad to hear that. I'll see you after work.
(13:55):
So I get up to where the gas station is
I'm making good time. But this gas ben, it's of
course the one that has the best prices, and it's
always the one that has the most cars and is
the busiest. So whenever that happens, I just turn our
left onto the frontage road, take that to another gas
station that's more expensive, right next to the freeway. So
(14:19):
now I'm on this frontage road, not even thinking about
it because I thought I had enough gas. But boy,
was I wrong with our luck that day ran out.
I went from yeah, three hundred dollars to oh shit,
my car is turning off. Oh no, yes, and it
was doing that thing where it starts pulling like it's
(14:41):
looking for the last, you know, morsels of gas. I
got lucky because there was a little spot to pull over.
Speaker 3 (14:48):
When I call my wifey and.
Speaker 4 (14:51):
She's like yeah, and I said, our luck today just
ran out.
Speaker 1 (14:55):
Slap me around a little bit.
Speaker 3 (14:57):
Now I had to think quick Ben.
Speaker 4 (15:00):
I'm like okay, and I luckily I had a gas
can in the garage and she knew where it was.
Speaker 3 (15:05):
I'm doing the math in my head.
Speaker 4 (15:06):
I'm like, okay, if she takes this gas can, gets
to that corner gas station and then comes and finds
me on the frontage road. That's at least twenty minutes.
I gotta be to work. I gotta be to the studios,
crossing my fingers. I went from early to late. Now,
poor nine month pregnant wife waddling to the gas station.
(15:30):
And when I say waddling, she's having a hard time
walking right now.
Speaker 3 (15:34):
So there's this.
Speaker 1 (15:36):
Big almost at the finish line, right now, almost.
Speaker 4 (15:39):
Big pregnant lady at the gas pump, filling up a
gas can as if she's going to go mo a lawn.
Speaker 3 (15:47):
It's one hundred and five outside. It is scorching hot.
Speaker 4 (15:52):
I'm sitting there and I'm literally sweating bullets because I
can't run the air conditioner obviously from my car. And
so she pulls up finally, Yes, get it, put the
gas in. Now the Covino and Rich show, they were
out on Tuesday. But when I went there to help
(16:13):
Monsey and dan Byer fill in, I walked in Ben
at two three pm, so I was only three minutes behind.
After the whole fiasco.
Speaker 1 (16:24):
Wow, and the kid, your son to be named later
there would have been great if he had been born
at the gas station, Danny.
Speaker 3 (16:33):
There's a bottom I ready to bring the gas.
Speaker 1 (16:36):
Man if that had happened. But that's great. I've done
the gas roulette a few times. We've all done it.
One time, I was in the hills above Pasadena and
it was late at night. I think it was the weekend,
if I remember correctly, like Saturday, and I only had
(16:57):
a few miles left in the tank. The things flashed
on the dashboard and I'm cruising down from the top
there and I ended up going by multiple gas stations
that were closed. I don't ever remember seeing gas stations
I had. Gas stations are always open, but in Pasadena,
up in the hills, there were some gas stations and
(17:18):
they were completely closed, and I was literally cruising. I
was trying to time. I was hoping I would time
the intersections so I could go through all the green
lights and not have to stop because I wanted to
keep In this case, there was actually momentum. There's no
momentum in sports, but there was actually momentum in my
car rolling down the hill to make it to the bottom,
because I figured the gas stations that are near the
(17:41):
freeway the highway would be open, and they were. But
that's as close as I came to running out of fuel.
I've not completely run out of fuel.
Speaker 4 (17:52):
It bugged me because my initial target that gas station
on the corner that has the best prices. I would
have made it, but instead I tried to go the
route with no people, you know, and that's when you're antisocial.
Sometimes it works against you because whenever I see lines
of cars at a gas station, I'm like, I am
not sitting in a line of cars for gas. I'll
(18:14):
go pay the extra money somewhere where there's no cars.
Speaker 1 (18:18):
Well, I do not pay extra money, but I do
time it. And I've been pretty lucky. Like I know
with Costco, the schedule I have, I can get the
Costco when it opens. The gas station opens at five
point thirty. They usually open like at five twenty, and
there's like five people there in the morning, or if
you go right before they close, you know, almost nobody there.
(18:39):
But I mean, that's a Costco thing. But as far
as like the regular gas stations, I try to avoid
those at all costs. But you know, it is really
hit and miss, and you have a see you work
during the prime hours, like you're getting gas.
Speaker 4 (18:53):
I was going to say, you luck out because of
those hours, because when I was working on the Clay
Travis show. It was awesome because after his show, you're
you know, people were busy going to work for the
day and I was done. So I was one of
the five people at grocery stores where I could just
walk around and not bump into anybody. There were really
(19:14):
nothing but senior citizens. And I was like, yes, I
love those hours. Now I leave my house at you know,
twelve forty five pm at lunchtime to get to the studios.
Speaker 3 (19:25):
So you're right, I'm like, right in the thick of things.
Speaker 1 (19:27):
You're in the middle of the jungle. And when I'm
out in the wilderness, but there's everyone's sleeping when I'm
in the wilderness. So the other day I was mining
my own business this last week and it was Thursday.
I was getting ready for that night's show, Thursday and Friday,
per normal, my normal routine, and out of the blue,
(19:48):
I get a buzz and I look down and like,
I'm like, who the hell's bothering me? What do they want?
Why would someone send me a message? Here? It was
a text to the bullpen Danny, And all of a sudden,
I find myself warming up. It was hey, how would
you like to sit in on the midday show tomorrow
(20:09):
on AM five seventy. We're looking for somebody. I'm like, well,
you know, it's the dates like the night before. I'm like,
what are you doing? So it turns out Rodney Pete,
the former Lions quarterback, and I played it USC back
in the day and he was away, and so Fred
Rogan wanted to play. And that's that's how that happened.
(20:33):
So I was told. Originally the Dodgers were playing the Mets,
and they said there's a big chance for thunderstorms and
they think the game is going to be rain delayed
on Friday night, Dodgers and Mets. So if that happens,
because this is the local station in LA, they would
They had petrols and money on standby. So that meant
either the show was going to be one hour with
(20:55):
Fred the way they told me is probably one hour,
but it might be it might be the full three
hour thing, might be the full three hour thing. So
he's gonna be like noon to one or noon to
three o'clock. So I was like, all right it so
for this, oh god, no, no, I told him. I said, listen,
(21:15):
I got I. I would do it. But I can't.
There's no way I'm gonna drive it. There's no way
I'm driving. And they said sure. They were like desperate
to get something. So I said, yeah, sure it would
and they said okay, and so so I did. I
did the show from the home studio here local airwaves.
It was good. It was good to be on talking,
you know, Dodgers. I got to talk to my guy,
(21:37):
Victor break.
Speaker 3 (21:40):
Nice. I'm I'm sad I missed that.
Speaker 1 (21:43):
People have been asked. I get email from people say, oh,
what are you filling on this station or that station.
It's like I I always I don't look anymore for
the filling gigs because I got a good gig, so
I don't really need it on. My plate's pretty full
right now. I don't go sniffing around. But if anybody
reach out to me, I usually do them. If my
schedule allows it, I'll do it pretty much, you know,
(22:06):
all the time. I mean, so anyway that we worked out,
and I don't know m I do it again. I
haven't done any of those local shows. It's probably been
five or six years since I popped up over there.
I think it was twenty I think i'd been twenty seventeen,
the last time I did stuff the Dodgers and the
cheating Astros in that whole year. So so that was that.
(22:32):
And the word is Monday, Nanny. I might be called back.
I might be called back on Monday. So who knows,
Maybe I'll.
Speaker 3 (22:40):
Kick it at old school.
Speaker 4 (22:41):
That reminds me of a few years in a row
where I would leave NBC Sports on the weekend and
you and Looney would be on the air as I
would be driving home.
Speaker 1 (22:51):
All the Fox Sports plitz. Yes, the award winning was
very popular show. People loved that. We that seven years,
I think it was Danny seven years we did that
plush show, which was only supposed to last one season.
We were like temporarily there, and then there was somebody
else that was going to come in and do the show,
and then management liked us, and then seven years later
(23:13):
they hated the show fire and canceled the show. But
prior to that, it was pretty very popular and we
had all those like Fox people on and it was
great because they hated doing it and we knew they
hated doing it, some of them, and so it made
for a very very interesting dynamic there. Joe Buck was kidnapped, yes,
(23:34):
like Joe Buck. You know, Joe Buck and Troy Aikman
did not want to talk to Tom Looney and Ben Maller, right,
they did not want to do that, but they had to.
They were contractually obligated to do it, and so they
did it.
Speaker 3 (23:44):
He's a thick guy from the waist down.
Speaker 1 (23:48):
And Aaron Andrews and the whole the whole team there,
they were, they were they were nice enough to call
in because they had to. But you know, you know
how you have guests on Danny, and sometimes you know
they're into it, and sometimes you know they're not in it,
and you can tell right away whether the person you're
talking to is engaged and really giving you their full
attention and full effort. And sometimes that happens. And there
(24:10):
were some of the people that we had on that were.
Speaker 3 (24:12):
Absolutely wonderful, like the kid at the World Series.
Speaker 1 (24:16):
I don't know, that's that's the worst guest ever. The
Little League World Series kid from Hawaii who's probably he's
probably got like three kids now and he is, you know, married.
The whole thing. Now, as far as the phrase of
the week, Daddy, the phrase of the week.
Speaker 3 (24:31):
The phrase of the week, and Here is.
Speaker 1 (24:34):
The phrase of the week, kid glove treatment. Have you
ever used the term kid glove treatment?
Speaker 4 (24:42):
No, but I've heard you say this on the Live
Overnight Show when you think the media is being too
easy on.
Speaker 1 (24:49):
Yeah, when they're being soft and you know your old,
you know, kid glove treatment by the media softball questions
that kind of stuff. So it turns out not know this,
but the term kid glove treatment does not reference like
actual children wearing gloves, but it does reference leather gloves,
(25:11):
like really fine leather gloves, which I did not know
are made from kid skin or kid leather. It's made
from the hide of a young goat, and a young
goat is called a kid. Who knew? Did you know that?
Speaker 3 (25:27):
I didn't know.
Speaker 1 (25:28):
No.
Speaker 4 (25:28):
I just assumed it was like a boxing glove for
a kid.
Speaker 1 (25:32):
Yeah. No, So kid leather is supposedly amazingly soft and thin,
and the wearer of kid gloves can handle objects, but
they have to handle them carefully because they don't want
to scratch or rip the leather. So to handle with
kid gloves, use the kid glove treatment means to handle
(25:52):
a situation carefully, but it it references a type of
leather used in a glove, the kid young goat leather
the hide of a young goat. So that is kid
glove treatment. You live and learn, Danny, I had no idea.
All these years I've been saying that I had no
(26:14):
clue what that was all about.
Speaker 3 (26:18):
I learned two things every two months on this show.
Speaker 1 (26:22):
You give us a couple of months, you might learn something,
not something you need to know, not something that will
improve your life, but just some random thing. Yes, all right,
So I think we'll say we have some pop culture stuff.
I think we'll do that on the Sunday podcast. We'll
go too long on this extravaganza, and we'll have the
(26:42):
mail bag. We've got a bunch of listener mail from
random people who have checked in. Oh, as far as
the backscratch, let me get to the backscratcher. So this
is where we ask you. We beg of you to
go to the Apple podcast page podcast dot Apple dot
com and to post a review of this podcast. Why. Well,
(27:05):
the reason why is because the people upstairs that prance
around in the corner office and flaunt the power that
they have. I love to read the reviews on the
Apple podcast page. They just be frank with you. But
not somebody named Frank. I'm just being Frank, so that.
Speaker 3 (27:24):
Apples tell me a lot.
Speaker 1 (27:26):
My man, oh man, I got to make sure those
reviews are still coming in. My man is very straightforward.
So yeah, help us out. Now, this week, did we
have three reviews, one review or no reviews on the
backscratcher at the Apple podcast page.
Speaker 3 (27:46):
I'm going to say we had one and it was spectacular.
Speaker 1 (27:50):
Danny, you are what's known as a cock eyed optimist,
and you, my friend, are wrong. We had no We
had a gooseg this week. Danny, we were shot zip
bo bupkis nothing, which is different.
Speaker 3 (28:05):
Why do you even bring the back scratch your up?
Then you should have just ignored it.
Speaker 1 (28:08):
Well that's a good point. I probably should have ignored it.
But but no, we've done so well, and so I
want to encourage other people that have not yet taken
the time out the other minions. I see how many
people download this podcast we have. The percentage of people
that have actually written a review is about half of
one percent of the actual number of regular downloads that
(28:29):
we get for this podcast. So if we can get
Danny to five percent, we're at half of one percent
of the people that download this podcast on a regular basis.
If we can get to five percent, we will be
living an amazing life. That's what we need. That's my goal.
(28:49):
That's why I brought up Backscratcher, and with that we'll
get out of here. It's Saturday. Anything you want to
promote Danny anything at all?
Speaker 4 (28:56):
Yeah, go into the description on this very podcast and
click on where it says subscribe and write a review,
and then you'll space down a little bit and you'll
see the overall review for the show, which is like
a four point nine and leads the FSR lineup. By
the way, I think we're getting raises for that. You're
(29:19):
going to get a new pool in your backyard there, Ben.
Speaker 1 (29:23):
I'm a mud pool back there right now. It's very nice.
The animals love it.
Speaker 4 (29:27):
Click on write a review and it has you like
create a handle and then you could click five stars
if you think we're worthy, and then write your review.
Speaker 3 (29:36):
That's how you do it, man.
Speaker 4 (29:37):
So if you're going to bring up the description and
the Apple podcast and leaving a review, I'll tell you
exactly how to do it.
Speaker 3 (29:44):
It is Saturday.
Speaker 4 (29:46):
Besides this podcast, just going to get some last minute
things done. I have to pack a hospital bag, which
is a scary piece of business. I've never had someone say,
make sure your hospital bag is packed, getting ready to go.
Speaker 1 (30:01):
It's exciting. We're getting close to the big day here.
How many more days are we look at it? I
guess it could happen in any moment, right.
Speaker 4 (30:08):
Any moment, because we are literally just nine days from
the actual do date.
Speaker 1 (30:14):
Oley, Leo, leo, Leah.
Speaker 3 (30:16):
The clunk is ticking.
Speaker 4 (30:17):
It could happen at any point, at any gas station,
at any pump.
Speaker 1 (30:26):
Why and you will be serenaded with the sound of
a child crying. But maybe maybe you'll be your baby
will be calm and not. I think all babies cry,
don't they.
Speaker 4 (30:37):
I think there's yeah, a little bit. But you know,
my girl has been to the rodeo before. She knows
how to sue the soul, so I think we'll be okay.
Speaker 1 (30:47):
You can kind of subdue the child a little bit. There.
Speaker 4 (30:50):
Little teaspoon of Benadrilla always does the trick. Here you go,
whatever it takes.
Speaker 1 (30:55):
And I'm not doing a damn thing because my leg's
all screwed up because I dropped a damn ninja sword
on my legs. So I will be taking it very
easy today. Not much going on for.
Speaker 3 (31:06):
Me, but injury is almost worth it, just so you
could tell the story.
Speaker 1 (31:10):
By the time I repeat this here once I'm healed, Danny,
I will tell everyone that I survived being stabbed by
a ninja sword. I will leave out the part where
I was the one that stabbed myself because I'm a klutz.
I will leave that out. But by the time I
tell this, like five years from that, probably like next month.
When I tell the story, it'll be amazing. Anyway, have
(31:31):
a great Saturday. Thank you for downloading, and don't forget Sunday.
We have pop culture and pop goes to the culture
and the mailbag. We'll talk to you then.
Speaker 3 (31:40):
Austa Posta got a murder. I gotta go
Kabooms.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
If you thought four hours a day, twelve hundred minutes
a week was enough, think again. He's the last remnants
of the old republic, a sol fashion of fairness. He
treats crackheads in the ghetto gutter the same as the
rich pill poppers in the penthouse.
Speaker 1 (00:18):
Wow.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
The Clearinghouse of Hot takes break free for something special.
The Fifth Hour with Ben Maller starts right now.
Speaker 1 (00:29):
In the air everywhere, back at it. The podcast dojo
is open for business. The Fifth Hour with Ben Mahler
and Danny G. We thank you for hanging out with
us on the weekend. Tremendous, tremendous job by you, downloading, subscribing,
(00:50):
listening to this podcast. We think you think you. Thank
you and Danny G. We also think Omar vs. Scale
the old baseball player from the Cleveland Indians and the
Seattle Mariners, a bunch of other teams who came on
yesterday for some stimulating old school baseball talk.
Speaker 3 (01:08):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (01:09):
I like it when my baseball card collection comes to
life on the radio.
Speaker 3 (01:14):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (01:14):
I was talking to a friend of mine. I was
actually texting a friend of mine. I was like, we
have had the weirdest collection on this podcast of former
athletes that have popped up. It's so random, Danny. Over
the years, now you've been with me a while, but
over the years we've had, among others, Lenny Dykstra, We've
had the great Tommy John Omarvis Scale has been out
(01:39):
of that list. We've had a few other athletes like
random athletes. And for some reason it must be an
age thing. I love talking to random old baseball players
in particular, there's something and basketball players too, but it's
like going back in time and catching up with some
of these cats as they are now just out of
sports and they're just living there lives and all that stuff.
(02:01):
There's something about that.
Speaker 4 (02:02):
Coaches though, need to be Hall of Fame status, like
Tick Vermeil and who else.
Speaker 1 (02:10):
Brian Billick, Brian Billick, Brian Billock, Well, that Billock. That
was the that was the big one, the Billick one.
I mean, it's almost like I didn't hear it when
he was on. It was it was wild. So we
have this week on or today, I should say it
this week just today on the podcast. We had almar
of Asco yesterday today on the menu. If we get
(02:31):
to all this, we might save some of it for
the Sunday podcast. We'll see it goes. But we have
the Ninja of the Night, running out of Luck, and
the text to the Bullpen. We also have backscratcher Phrase
of the Week, and we'll see what else we have
time for. So this being the Saturday podcast, The Life
of Malord, the Life of Danny G and a global
(02:53):
podcast exclusive, I have saved as sordid tale, a hum
dinger of a story for this podcast. Now. I have
not told this story on radio. I've not told this
story anywhere. There's only a few people that know this.
In fact, Danny G, you do not even know the
story I'm about to tell. You are completely unaware of
(03:16):
where we are going right now, and I would like
you to buckle up, Danny. This is going to be wild.
It's going to be crazy.
Speaker 3 (03:24):
I'm going to have Marcel tweeked this out on the
FSR and count what well.
Speaker 1 (03:28):
Marcel is the guy that broke the Titanic crash story.
He was ahead of his time. So, as Paul Harvey
would say, back in the day, you know what the
news is, but in the next few minutes you're going
to hear the rest of the story. So this week,
I did something in my life that I've never done
before and I hope to never do again. Danny, And
(03:51):
what is that, you asked, Well, this is the beginning
of the tale. So we go back to the Sunday night,
Monday morning overnight show start of the week. Through the show,
It's early in the morning. I cruise home. I went
to change into my gym shoes to visit my friend
(04:11):
named Treadmill. And it was dark. It's late night overnight.
It was dark. I had driven a long distance. I
was tired from the FSR Mothership to the north Woods.
The chair that I normally sit on to change into
my my my gym stuff right kind of near the
(04:33):
front door. And you've been over to the house, Danny,
you kind of know the setup there. So I look
over to where I normally sit and it's kind of
dark and all that, and I see there's a couple
of katanas that have been placed on it, and I'm like, well,
what's up with that? You know that's where I sit,
(04:54):
you know. So now, if you're uneducated, I think most
people know what a katana is, but if you're not
familiarliar with that. It is a Japanese sword, which it's
the curved, single edged blade with it's it's got a
very large grip on it to accommodate two hands, just
(05:16):
like a ninja, like a Ninja of the night would have.
Speaker 3 (05:18):
This, right seeing those on pond Stars.
Speaker 1 (05:21):
Yeah, exactly, exactly. So, so there are two of these
katanas that are right where I need to be, where
my big fat ass needs to be so it can
be a little less fat, and I need to change
it into my gym class. So okay, so I'm like,
all right, whatever. You know, most people here call them
ninja swords. If they don't call them katanas, they call
(05:42):
ninja ninja swords. So these were placed here, not by
my wife, but by another member of the household here, Danny,
you're very familiar with that person who shall be left
nameless for the purposes of this podcast. To protect the guilty.
(06:04):
So I grab these katanas, these ninja swords to move
them so I can sit my ass down to put
the sneakers on. And somehow, while I was in the
process of doing this, one of these ninja swords slid
out of the shield that it was in. Oh no,
(06:25):
a sheef whatever it's called. So it slid out of
that sheaf. It then falls down and slices a chunk
of my right leg. Oh yeah, so mind you there
is Now it's starting to bleed. I'm like, well, maybe
(06:46):
it's not that bad. Maybe it was just a grazing blow.
And it's bleeding there. It starts looking like a crime scene.
I'm withering in pain, I'm screaming profanity and I ended
up being driven to the emergency room by my wife
with a and I end up getting a bunch of
stitches to patch up my right leg. And yeah, the
(07:10):
samurai sword came down. It hit right between my knee
and my foot, closer to my foot, right near the
right ankle. And I was actually lucky it wasn't worth.
It's one of those good news bad news things, Danny,
because the good news is I could have lost a
toe or part of my foot. I didn't, and I
(07:33):
needed the stitches. They'll come out, I think ten to
fourteen days from the time I had them, and I
never made it to the gym. I hit the pause
button on that. Now. The bad news is that's the
good news. The bad news is that I will no longer, Danny,
be able to continue my career as a catwalk leg model.
I will not be able to wear the short skirts
(07:55):
anymore because my leg's pretty chopped up and so, but
I can still walk. I didn't, you know, it's not
it could have been much worse. But I ask you, Danny,
how many people do you think can say they are
such a big, such a big clutch that they ended
up basically stabbing themselves with a ninja sword. I didn't
(08:16):
even missed a show, by the way, I just kept
doing the shows.
Speaker 3 (08:18):
Yeah, Warrior.
Speaker 4 (08:21):
This reminds me of early on in my radio days.
We had a, you know, like one of those danger
boys on our morning show. On this particular morning show,
his name was Squid Boy, who he would do all
the dumb stunts on the morning show and he was
the butt of a lot of jokes. He was pretty
pretty funny character on our show. And he came in
(08:44):
one morning and he had ninja stars with him. Not
a bagged lunch, not a pair of headphones. No, he
was carrying ninja stars.
Speaker 1 (08:54):
Justink, justin king.
Speaker 4 (08:56):
And when we asked him on the air why he
was carrying those around with him, he said, these are
my practice stars. It was so dead serious, and my
co host said, where are you going to practice today
with the hose? And so that's my first question. Why
(09:17):
were their ninja swords sitting there at your house?
Speaker 1 (09:21):
Well, the the wife had had had gotten these for
the uh, the person we will not name in said
house here as a gift, and apparently they were taken
out to to show off. As I understand it, they
(09:41):
normally are not there due to the resourcefulness of the
person who put them there.
Speaker 4 (09:49):
It's like when we take out our gun collection once
in a while.
Speaker 1 (09:55):
You know, you take out your your different uh bullets
and guns and whatnot and show them up. So, so yeah,
they were That's why they were there. And I go
into the emergency room and they they you know, you
go in there and they're like, what are you here for?
What happened?
Speaker 3 (10:09):
You know?
Speaker 1 (10:09):
And wait, you dropped a ninja sword and it stabbed
you in the leg, Like what are you talking to me?
Speaker 3 (10:16):
That's a good story.
Speaker 4 (10:18):
And by the way, I looked it up and the
sword sheath is called a scabbard.
Speaker 3 (10:24):
A scabbard, you're going to have a scabbard all right?
Speaker 1 (10:28):
Yeah? Well I told my wife, I said, I am
never touching the katana again. That was the last time
I touched the katana. Uh that is it. And I
guess there's an art to picking up these things. And
whatever I did, I don't even really know what I did.
I must have picked them up the wrong way. This
thing came sliding out and bam, slice slice baby.
Speaker 4 (10:50):
Oh you're lucky. Is it sharp enough to where it
could have sliced your foot off?
Speaker 3 (10:56):
Well, I don't.
Speaker 1 (10:57):
I didn't think it was that sharp. I don't deal
with these things. I know they've been in the house
for a while, but I didn't really mess around with
them because it's not my thing. You know. I was
told by my mom not to play with swords when
I was when I was a kid, so I just
like stayed away room. You know, I'm around butter knife, Danny.
I'm a little paranoid. I cook a lot now, I'm
like to cook and the I cook a lot of
the meals on the weekends and stuff, and uh so, yeah,
(11:20):
I get. But I didn't run out of luck, Danny,
because I did end up. I'm gonna be fine. I
have a thing on my leg and all that. And
my wife was giving me a hard time because I
still drove into the studio and She's like, you don't
have to you get the ultimate trump card to get
out of work. You got you know, you stab.
Speaker 4 (11:37):
Yourself with the imagine our boss reading that text message.
Speaker 1 (11:42):
Yeah, hey, Scott, I can't I can't come in tonight
because uh I got stabbed by a katana uh in
the middle of the night, and uh so I hope
that never happens again. It was very painful. You know,
I've not been stabbed. Have you been stabbed before?
Speaker 3 (11:58):
Even?
Speaker 1 (11:58):
I know, it's like it's weirdly because it's stabbing. I
dropped it. I didn't like poke the knife into me,
the blade. But it's still wild, crazy man, the pain,
the agony. But I'm lucky. I didn't run out of
luck to any other people have run out of luck?
Speaker 3 (12:13):
Right? Have you ever played gas Roulette?
Speaker 1 (12:18):
I played Roulette. I don't know. Oh okay, okay, wait
a minute, Oh yeah, yeah, oh yeah, okay, yeah, oh yeah.
Speaker 4 (12:24):
We had the old game of gas roulette where you
are down to twenty miles left for the tank and
the digital readout on your car. You are definitely paying
attention to it, but at the same time you are
risking at all.
Speaker 3 (12:39):
You're like, well, I can't go right now.
Speaker 4 (12:43):
I'm going to have to go right before work, and
so that's exactly what I did Tuesday morning. Now, as
I'm driving to the gas station, I get a call
from my Wifey, and that's not common as I'm on
my way to work. So I pick up my phone
and she says, Hey, guess what. It's our lucky day.
(13:03):
There was some clerical mistake at my job with payroll
and they cut me a check for three hundred dollars,
just some error where her boss told her, you know what,
consider it a gift. The check is already cut.
Speaker 1 (13:19):
Wow.
Speaker 3 (13:20):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (13:22):
Although it's funny because fast forward a few days later,
she gets the check seventy nine dollars after all the
taxes were taken out.
Speaker 1 (13:30):
Ah, that sucks.
Speaker 3 (13:31):
Such crap.
Speaker 4 (13:33):
Welcome to California, ladies and gentlemen. But this is good
to hear because obviously we're watching every dollar right now
as this baby is about to and everything has been expensive,
and obviously the cost of living here where we're at
is insane. I told her, I'm like, man, that's good news.
I'm glad to hear that. I'll see you after work.
(13:55):
So I get up to where the gas station is
I'm making good time. But this gas ben, it's of
course the one that has the best prices, and it's
always the one that has the most cars and is
the busiest. So whenever that happens, I just turn our
left onto the frontage road, take that to another gas
station that's more expensive, right next to the freeway. So
(14:19):
now I'm on this frontage road, not even thinking about
it because I thought I had enough gas. But boy,
was I wrong with our luck that day ran out.
I went from yeah, three hundred dollars to oh shit,
my car is turning off. Oh no, yes, and it
was doing that thing where it starts pulling like it's
(14:41):
looking for the last, you know, morsels of gas. I
got lucky because there was a little spot to pull over.
Speaker 3 (14:48):
When I call my wifey and.
Speaker 4 (14:51):
She's like yeah, and I said, our luck today just
ran out.
Speaker 1 (14:55):
Slap me around a little bit.
Speaker 3 (14:57):
Now I had to think quick Ben.
Speaker 4 (15:00):
I'm like okay, and I luckily I had a gas
can in the garage and she knew where it was.
Speaker 3 (15:05):
I'm doing the math in my head.
Speaker 4 (15:06):
I'm like, okay, if she takes this gas can, gets
to that corner gas station and then comes and finds
me on the frontage road. That's at least twenty minutes.
I gotta be to work. I gotta be to the studios,
crossing my fingers. I went from early to late. Now,
poor nine month pregnant wife waddling to the gas station.
(15:30):
And when I say waddling, she's having a hard time
walking right now.
Speaker 3 (15:34):
So there's this.
Speaker 1 (15:36):
Big almost at the finish line, right now, almost.
Speaker 4 (15:39):
Big pregnant lady at the gas pump, filling up a
gas can as if she's going to go mo a lawn.
Speaker 3 (15:47):
It's one hundred and five outside. It is scorching hot.
Speaker 4 (15:52):
I'm sitting there and I'm literally sweating bullets because I
can't run the air conditioner obviously from my car. And
so she pulls up finally, Yes, get it, put the
gas in. Now the Covino and Rich show, they were
out on Tuesday. But when I went there to help
(16:13):
Monsey and dan Byer fill in, I walked in Ben
at two three pm, so I was only three minutes behind.
After the whole fiasco.
Speaker 1 (16:24):
Wow, and the kid, your son to be named later
there would have been great if he had been born
at the gas station, Danny.
Speaker 3 (16:33):
There's a bottom I ready to bring the gas.
Speaker 1 (16:36):
Man if that had happened. But that's great. I've done
the gas roulette a few times. We've all done it.
One time, I was in the hills above Pasadena and
it was late at night. I think it was the weekend,
if I remember correctly, like Saturday, and I only had
(16:57):
a few miles left in the tank. The things flashed
on the dashboard and I'm cruising down from the top
there and I ended up going by multiple gas stations
that were closed. I don't ever remember seeing gas stations
I had. Gas stations are always open, but in Pasadena,
up in the hills, there were some gas stations and
(17:18):
they were completely closed, and I was literally cruising. I
was trying to time. I was hoping I would time
the intersections so I could go through all the green
lights and not have to stop because I wanted to
keep In this case, there was actually momentum. There's no
momentum in sports, but there was actually momentum in my
car rolling down the hill to make it to the bottom,
because I figured the gas stations that are near the
(17:41):
freeway the highway would be open, and they were. But
that's as close as I came to running out of fuel.
I've not completely run out of fuel.
Speaker 4 (17:52):
It bugged me because my initial target that gas station
on the corner that has the best prices. I would
have made it, but instead I tried to go the
route with no people, you know, and that's when you're antisocial.
Sometimes it works against you because whenever I see lines
of cars at a gas station, I'm like, I am
not sitting in a line of cars for gas. I'll
(18:14):
go pay the extra money somewhere where there's no cars.
Speaker 1 (18:18):
Well, I do not pay extra money, but I do
time it. And I've been pretty lucky. Like I know
with Costco, the schedule I have, I can get the
Costco when it opens. The gas station opens at five
point thirty. They usually open like at five twenty, and
there's like five people there in the morning, or if
you go right before they close, you know, almost nobody there.
(18:39):
But I mean, that's a Costco thing. But as far
as like the regular gas stations, I try to avoid
those at all costs. But you know, it is really
hit and miss, and you have a see you work
during the prime hours, like you're getting gas.
Speaker 4 (18:53):
I was going to say, you luck out because of
those hours, because when I was working on the Clay
Travis show. It was awesome because after his show, you're
you know, people were busy going to work for the
day and I was done. So I was one of
the five people at grocery stores where I could just
walk around and not bump into anybody. There were really
(19:14):
nothing but senior citizens. And I was like, yes, I
love those hours. Now I leave my house at you know,
twelve forty five pm at lunchtime to get to the studios.
Speaker 3 (19:25):
So you're right, I'm like, right in the thick of things.
Speaker 1 (19:27):
You're in the middle of the jungle. And when I'm
out in the wilderness, but there's everyone's sleeping when I'm
in the wilderness. So the other day I was mining
my own business this last week and it was Thursday.
I was getting ready for that night's show, Thursday and Friday,
per normal, my normal routine, and out of the blue,
(19:48):
I get a buzz and I look down and like,
I'm like, who the hell's bothering me? What do they want?
Why would someone send me a message? Here? It was
a text to the bullpen Danny, And all of a sudden,
I find myself warming up. It was hey, how would
you like to sit in on the midday show tomorrow
(20:09):
on AM five seventy. We're looking for somebody. I'm like, well,
you know, it's the dates like the night before. I'm like,
what are you doing? So it turns out Rodney Pete,
the former Lions quarterback, and I played it USC back
in the day and he was away, and so Fred
Rogan wanted to play. And that's that's how that happened.
(20:33):
So I was told. Originally the Dodgers were playing the Mets,
and they said there's a big chance for thunderstorms and
they think the game is going to be rain delayed
on Friday night, Dodgers and Mets. So if that happens,
because this is the local station in LA, they would
They had petrols and money on standby. So that meant
either the show was going to be one hour with
(20:55):
Fred the way they told me is probably one hour,
but it might be it might be the full three
hour thing, might be the full three hour thing. So
he's gonna be like noon to one or noon to
three o'clock. So I was like, all right it so
for this, oh god, no, no, I told him. I said, listen,
(21:15):
I got I. I would do it. But I can't.
There's no way I'm gonna drive it. There's no way
I'm driving. And they said sure. They were like desperate
to get something. So I said, yeah, sure it would
and they said okay, and so so I did. I
did the show from the home studio here local airwaves.
It was good. It was good to be on talking,
you know, Dodgers. I got to talk to my guy,
(21:37):
Victor break.
Speaker 3 (21:40):
Nice. I'm I'm sad I missed that.
Speaker 1 (21:43):
People have been asked. I get email from people say, oh,
what are you filling on this station or that station.
It's like I I always I don't look anymore for
the filling gigs because I got a good gig, so
I don't really need it on. My plate's pretty full
right now. I don't go sniffing around. But if anybody
reach out to me, I usually do them. If my
schedule allows it, I'll do it pretty much, you know,
(22:06):
all the time. I mean, so anyway that we worked out,
and I don't know m I do it again. I
haven't done any of those local shows. It's probably been
five or six years since I popped up over there.
I think it was twenty I think i'd been twenty seventeen,
the last time I did stuff the Dodgers and the
cheating Astros in that whole year. So so that was that.
(22:32):
And the word is Monday, Nanny. I might be called back.
I might be called back on Monday. So who knows,
Maybe I'll.
Speaker 3 (22:40):
Kick it at old school.
Speaker 4 (22:41):
That reminds me of a few years in a row
where I would leave NBC Sports on the weekend and
you and Looney would be on the air as I
would be driving home.
Speaker 1 (22:51):
All the Fox Sports plitz. Yes, the award winning was
very popular show. People loved that. We that seven years,
I think it was Danny seven years we did that
plush show, which was only supposed to last one season.
We were like temporarily there, and then there was somebody
else that was going to come in and do the show,
and then management liked us, and then seven years later
(23:13):
they hated the show fire and canceled the show. But
prior to that, it was pretty very popular and we
had all those like Fox people on and it was
great because they hated doing it and we knew they
hated doing it, some of them, and so it made
for a very very interesting dynamic there. Joe Buck was kidnapped, yes,
(23:34):
like Joe Buck. You know, Joe Buck and Troy Aikman
did not want to talk to Tom Looney and Ben Maller, right,
they did not want to do that, but they had to.
They were contractually obligated to do it, and so they
did it.
Speaker 3 (23:44):
He's a thick guy from the waist down.
Speaker 1 (23:48):
And Aaron Andrews and the whole the whole team there,
they were, they were they were nice enough to call
in because they had to. But you know, you know
how you have guests on Danny, and sometimes you know
they're into it, and sometimes you know they're not in it,
and you can tell right away whether the person you're
talking to is engaged and really giving you their full
attention and full effort. And sometimes that happens. And there
(24:10):
were some of the people that we had on that were.
Speaker 3 (24:12):
Absolutely wonderful, like the kid at the World Series.
Speaker 1 (24:16):
I don't know, that's that's the worst guest ever. The
Little League World Series kid from Hawaii who's probably he's
probably got like three kids now and he is, you know, married.
The whole thing. Now, as far as the phrase of
the week, Daddy, the phrase of the week.
Speaker 3 (24:31):
The phrase of the week, and Here is.
Speaker 1 (24:34):
The phrase of the week, kid glove treatment. Have you
ever used the term kid glove treatment?
Speaker 4 (24:42):
No, but I've heard you say this on the Live
Overnight Show when you think the media is being too
easy on.
Speaker 1 (24:49):
Yeah, when they're being soft and you know your old,
you know, kid glove treatment by the media softball questions
that kind of stuff. So it turns out not know this,
but the term kid glove treatment does not reference like
actual children wearing gloves, but it does reference leather gloves,
(25:11):
like really fine leather gloves, which I did not know
are made from kid skin or kid leather. It's made
from the hide of a young goat, and a young
goat is called a kid. Who knew? Did you know that?
Speaker 3 (25:27):
I didn't know.
Speaker 1 (25:28):
No.
Speaker 4 (25:28):
I just assumed it was like a boxing glove for
a kid.
Speaker 1 (25:32):
Yeah. No, So kid leather is supposedly amazingly soft and thin,
and the wearer of kid gloves can handle objects, but
they have to handle them carefully because they don't want
to scratch or rip the leather. So to handle with
kid gloves, use the kid glove treatment means to handle
(25:52):
a situation carefully, but it it references a type of
leather used in a glove, the kid young goat leather
the hide of a young goat. So that is kid
glove treatment. You live and learn, Danny, I had no idea.
All these years I've been saying that I had no
(26:14):
clue what that was all about.
Speaker 3 (26:18):
I learned two things every two months on this show.
Speaker 1 (26:22):
You give us a couple of months, you might learn something,
not something you need to know, not something that will
improve your life, but just some random thing. Yes, all right,
So I think we'll say we have some pop culture stuff.
I think we'll do that on the Sunday podcast. We'll
go too long on this extravaganza, and we'll have the
(26:42):
mail bag. We've got a bunch of listener mail from
random people who have checked in. Oh, as far as
the backscratch, let me get to the backscratcher. So this
is where we ask you. We beg of you to
go to the Apple podcast page podcast dot Apple dot
com and to post a review of this podcast. Why. Well,
(27:05):
the reason why is because the people upstairs that prance
around in the corner office and flaunt the power that
they have. I love to read the reviews on the
Apple podcast page. They just be frank with you. But
not somebody named Frank. I'm just being Frank, so that.
Speaker 3 (27:24):
Apples tell me a lot.
Speaker 1 (27:26):
My man, oh man, I got to make sure those
reviews are still coming in. My man is very straightforward.
So yeah, help us out. Now, this week, did we
have three reviews, one review or no reviews on the
backscratcher at the Apple podcast page.
Speaker 3 (27:46):
I'm going to say we had one and it was spectacular.
Speaker 1 (27:50):
Danny, you are what's known as a cock eyed optimist,
and you, my friend, are wrong. We had no We
had a gooseg this week. Danny, we were shot zip
bo bupkis nothing, which is different.
Speaker 3 (28:05):
Why do you even bring the back scratch your up?
Then you should have just ignored it.
Speaker 1 (28:08):
Well that's a good point. I probably should have ignored it.
But but no, we've done so well, and so I
want to encourage other people that have not yet taken
the time out the other minions. I see how many
people download this podcast we have. The percentage of people
that have actually written a review is about half of
one percent of the actual number of regular downloads that
(28:29):
we get for this podcast. So if we can get
Danny to five percent, we're at half of one percent
of the people that download this podcast on a regular basis.
If we can get to five percent, we will be
living an amazing life. That's what we need. That's my goal.
(28:49):
That's why I brought up Backscratcher, and with that we'll
get out of here. It's Saturday. Anything you want to
promote Danny anything at all?
Speaker 4 (28:56):
Yeah, go into the description on this very podcast and
click on where it says subscribe and write a review,
and then you'll space down a little bit and you'll
see the overall review for the show, which is like
a four point nine and leads the FSR lineup. By
the way, I think we're getting raises for that. You're
(29:19):
going to get a new pool in your backyard there, Ben.
Speaker 1 (29:23):
I'm a mud pool back there right now. It's very nice.
The animals love it.
Speaker 4 (29:27):
Click on write a review and it has you like
create a handle and then you could click five stars
if you think we're worthy, and then write your review.
Speaker 3 (29:36):
That's how you do it, man.
Speaker 4 (29:37):
So if you're going to bring up the description and
the Apple podcast and leaving a review, I'll tell you
exactly how to do it.
Speaker 3 (29:44):
It is Saturday.
Speaker 4 (29:46):
Besides this podcast, just going to get some last minute
things done. I have to pack a hospital bag, which
is a scary piece of business. I've never had someone say,
make sure your hospital bag is packed, getting ready to go.
Speaker 1 (30:01):
It's exciting. We're getting close to the big day here.
How many more days are we look at it? I
guess it could happen in any moment, right.
Speaker 4 (30:08):
Any moment, because we are literally just nine days from
the actual do date.
Speaker 1 (30:14):
Oley, Leo, leo, Leah.
Speaker 3 (30:16):
The clunk is ticking.
Speaker 4 (30:17):
It could happen at any point, at any gas station,
at any pump.
Speaker 1 (30:26):
Why and you will be serenaded with the sound of
a child crying. But maybe maybe you'll be your baby
will be calm and not. I think all babies cry,
don't they.
Speaker 4 (30:37):
I think there's yeah, a little bit. But you know,
my girl has been to the rodeo before. She knows
how to sue the soul, so I think we'll be okay.
Speaker 1 (30:47):
You can kind of subdue the child a little bit. There.
Speaker 4 (30:50):
Little teaspoon of Benadrilla always does the trick. Here you go,
whatever it takes.
Speaker 1 (30:55):
And I'm not doing a damn thing because my leg's
all screwed up because I dropped a damn ninja sword
on my legs. So I will be taking it very
easy today. Not much going on for.
Speaker 3 (31:06):
Me, but injury is almost worth it, just so you
could tell the story.
Speaker 1 (31:10):
By the time I repeat this here once I'm healed, Danny,
I will tell everyone that I survived being stabbed by
a ninja sword. I will leave out the part where
I was the one that stabbed myself because I'm a klutz.
I will leave that out. But by the time I
tell this, like five years from that, probably like next month.
When I tell the story, it'll be amazing. Anyway, have
(31:31):
a great Saturday. Thank you for downloading, and don't forget Sunday.
We have pop culture and pop goes to the culture
and the mailbag. We'll talk to you then.
Speaker 3 (31:40):
Austa Posta got a murder. I gotta go
Fox Sports Radio News
Host
Jonas Knox
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