3x Super Bowl Champ and BIASED NFL analyst Mark Schlereth (FS1's Breakfast Ball) gives TERRIBLE takes on the Washington Commanders & Philadelphia Eagles and gets himself KICKED OFF THE SHOW!! (although he does give a pretty good take on the Dallas Cowboys). Plus, Paulie & Tony tell you why Tommy Devito's stats ABSOLUTELY CRUSH the stats of a "legendary" NFL Hall of Famer, and they tell you why Joel Embiid is BEING UNFAIRLY ATTACKED for being late to Philadelphia 76ers practices.
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Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:04):
All right, alright, Govin do you're live from Philly. It's
the number one rated poly Toni Foo.
Speaker 2 (00:13):
Yo.
Speaker 3 (00:14):
As always poly Fools go here with Tony Foolsco and
Tony Huge show today. You know, and the people, these morons,
they always say this is the most biased inaccurate show
in all the media. Did you ever think people that
you're the one who's biased against the show?
Speaker 4 (00:31):
Yeah, go look in the mirror, unless you're driving right now,
then you know, Wait till you're at a stoplight, then look.
Speaker 3 (00:37):
Yeah, but you know, just to prove we're not biased,
wait until you hear our take on the Giant's QB situation.
Speaker 1 (00:42):
That'll shut you up.
Speaker 3 (00:44):
Let's talking about shutting up the people, Tonty, these idiots
complaining about the Tyson fight. Still, we'll tell you why
you've completely missed the obvious point. And Joel Embiid under
attack for doing absolutely nothing wrong. It's crazy why And
our guest today we'll talk about bias. Tony, the biggest
Washington Homer whoever lived. You know, we're gonna see how
(01:05):
miserable his life is now that the Commanders suck like
usual again getting blown out by the Eagles three times.
Super Bowl champ Mark Schlereth will be joining the show. Yeah,
and then promptly getting kicked off the show.
Speaker 1 (01:17):
Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 3 (01:18):
And by the way, we do have one big announcement, Tony,
very exciting for us. You know, a couple of weeks back,
we did what they call a branded integration with Defends
under Gods and well that was so successful for them,
stock shooting through the roof for them that today we
are announcing a deal with our new presenting sponsor, dolcal Ax,
the number one anal suppository in the business. What does
(01:42):
this mean for you? You're probably wondering nothing. Nothing, I viewing
your listening experience won't change your bit exactly. Sure you
might hear and add at due for dol Collects during
the show, but you probably won't even notice that.
Speaker 1 (01:55):
No, they're not even going to notice a little bit.
Speaker 4 (01:57):
So just sit back and relax, just like when you
put a dolkal axe up your.
Speaker 1 (02:02):
Ass, exactly.
Speaker 3 (02:04):
With that being said, so much to get those So
let's get right into a top story story drama in Philadelphia,
conflict breaking out on the Sixers as Dirase Maxi reportedly
came after Joe l Embiid for his constant tardiness, ridiculous
showing up late to six's day meetings, practices, everything else.
(02:24):
But Dowdy, I think it's totally clear that Tyrese Maxi
is the one who's out of line here.
Speaker 1 (02:30):
Absolutely.
Speaker 4 (02:31):
I think it's great that Joel Embiid is late to
everything after all those knee surgeries. We need him moving
as slowly and gingerly as possible anytime he's off the court.
To me, if he shows up two hours late for
a practice, he's right on time.
Speaker 1 (02:48):
Yup.
Speaker 3 (02:48):
And what do we always say is the key to
players succeeding in this modern NBA.
Speaker 4 (02:53):
Rest exactly And frankly, I think Embiid is being a
great leader here by showing up late to everything, he's
showing a total lack of urgency because he understands that
in the NBA it makes no sense to start caring
until like round two of the playoffs.
Speaker 1 (03:11):
Couldn't agree more, Dody.
Speaker 3 (03:12):
And also, you have you ever seen a tall person
try and get into a car? Takes for these short
people like Tyrese Maxie. They don't see what an unfair
advantage they have.
Speaker 4 (03:25):
You know, that's sizesm I'd like to see Tyrese Maxi
walking Joe Lmba's shoes for just one day. He'd be
late for everything because the shoes wouldn't fit and he'd
keep tripping over himself.
Speaker 1 (03:37):
Watch how slow he'd be, then.
Speaker 3 (03:39):
Watch how slow he'd be late for everything. Undeniable analysis
that Donny and now do there's Mike Tyson Jake ballfight.
You know, there's a lot being said about this fight still,
even though.
Speaker 1 (03:48):
Nobody cares anymore.
Speaker 3 (03:50):
But what if the main criticisms has been aimed at
Netflix and it's streaming issues, which you know, cause the
broadcast to stop loading for many people. These critics of
the Netflix, they're missing the point.
Speaker 4 (04:02):
Doesn't anyone realize that Netflix was deliberately causing all those
technical issues to save people from having to watch that fight.
They know how bad it was gonna be, so they
were trying to keep people from watching it.
Speaker 1 (04:16):
You know this has happened before. One time I tried
to watch.
Speaker 4 (04:19):
That Sydney Sweeney movie anyone but her, and it wouldn't load.
I later found out that Netflix executives were so embarrassed
by that piece of hot garbage that they call a movie,
they personally came to my house and cut my internet
line so that I couldn't see it and therefore couldn't
(04:40):
cancel my Netflix subscription.
Speaker 3 (04:43):
Just tremendous first person insight that, Tony. And well, now
let's finally get to NFL News. Of course, the big
story there Nick Sirianni six and oh since shaving his head,
Now people are saying this is just a coincidence that
he shaved his head and they started winning. No, I
mean all you gotta wonder about the science behind it.
You know, with all that hair on your head, maybe
(05:04):
the brain just you know, it drains the resources with
all the hair growing, and the brain could put more
resources towards thinking.
Speaker 4 (05:12):
Absolutely, just look at the greatest basketball player ever, Michael
Jordan's exactly bald, greatest boxer ever, Floyd Bald, greatest actor
of all time, Vin Easy Bald, the greatest businessman who ever.
Speaker 1 (05:31):
Lived, and it's Amazon guy y yeah.
Speaker 4 (05:34):
Bald, the greatest comedian ever, Howie Manel, yeah Bald. And
you know, I hate to say it, but maybe if
Albert Einstein had shaved his head, he could have been
a whole lot smarter.
Speaker 3 (05:48):
You just hate to think about what was left on
the table then, just you know, not in Einstein exactly. Anyway,
the other big news out of the NFL don't e
the Giants finally admitting their mistake benching Daniel Jones in
favor of Tommy DeVito. Tony, you know people they say
we're biased against other teams in the division. Now we're
(06:09):
gonna show you how good Tommy DeVito is. It's time
for a segment we do on the show that is
totally original.
Speaker 1 (06:16):
IP.
Speaker 3 (06:17):
It's called them a blind resume, brought to you by
Dolcalax when you want to totally shit yourself blind Dolcalax.
Speaker 1 (06:24):
Okay, well you know how this works, Tony.
Speaker 3 (06:26):
I'm gonna show you Tommy DeVito's stats on the left
side of the screen, and on the right, I'm going
to show you the stats of a mystery quarterback and
you you're going to try to guess who that other
QB is. All right, you're ready, Tony, yup, Let's do
it blind.
Speaker 1 (06:42):
Okay, let's compare hare.
Speaker 3 (06:43):
All right, Completion percentage Tommy DeVito sixty four percent, this
other QB fifty nine point four percent. Okay, passer rating
de Vito eighty nine point two, this other guy eighty
six point four Okay, finally interceptions DeVito just three this
(07:04):
other guy two hundred and fifty two.
Speaker 1 (07:06):
Okay, Donty, who is this other quarterback? You know I'm stumped.
I gotta say, I don't know who is it? Get
ready for this, Doty? The answer is Dan Marino. There
you go.
Speaker 3 (07:20):
This shows you Tommy DeVito already better than Dan Marine.
Speaker 4 (07:25):
Wow. You know got to say total head scratch and
move here by the giants that they haven't been starting
this guy from the.
Speaker 1 (07:32):
Get go, from the get go. Exactly, yeah, exactly.
Speaker 3 (07:36):
You know your people probably didn't notice at home wherever
you're listening, but we just made one hundred thousand dollars
might just like, don't in fact, Doty, why don't we
just go for more?
Speaker 5 (07:45):
Here?
Speaker 3 (07:46):
Let's do another what they call a branded integration. Okay,
this is where we do a sports segment, but we
we work the product in so seedlessly that you don't
even know it's an app.
Speaker 1 (07:55):
You don't even know yet made millions.
Speaker 3 (07:57):
Okay, so it's now time for the Dolcalas Shittiest Performance
of the Week. When you need a shitty performance, dolcal Axe. Okay, Tony,
who wins the award this week?
Speaker 4 (08:09):
The Dallas Cowboys, who set an NFL record with six
straight home games where they were behind by at least
twenty points. And there's nothing worse than falling behind that
far on points or daily shits.
Speaker 1 (08:22):
The Cowboys just can't seem.
Speaker 4 (08:24):
To get going, like an old constipated man on the toilet. Now,
they always find themselves trailing, just like you'll find yourself
leaving a trail of shit once you take dolcal As.
Speaker 3 (08:36):
You know, Tony, I gotta say, I honestly forgot you
were doing an ad until you said docal Ax right there.
Speaker 4 (08:42):
It was just so seamlessly baked right into the content. Yeah,
totally great job that, Dody.
Speaker 1 (08:48):
And I see our guess is coming on the line.
Speaker 3 (08:51):
So let's bring him on the full skol Satellite Network
sponsored by dolcal As.
Speaker 5 (08:56):
Fullsk Satellite Net Woke.
Speaker 3 (08:58):
Okay, welcome to our guest segment sponsored by dolcal As.
Speaker 1 (09:03):
When you need to ship dolcal.
Speaker 3 (09:05):
Axe and how appropriate today because our guest known by
the nickname Stink. You know, right, because you pissed and
ship your pants right during a game that happened.
Speaker 5 (09:14):
Uh well, yeah I pissed my pants. I didn't I
didn't ship myself, although just for you shit.
Speaker 3 (09:20):
Yourself that you yeah, yeah, okay, yeah yeah. Anyway, other
than that, less importantly, you did win three Super Bowls
with Washington and Denver as an offensive lineman. Now you
can see this guy every morning f S one's new
show breakfast Ball.
Speaker 1 (09:34):
He's on there.
Speaker 3 (09:35):
All right, let's bring him in here, Mark Schlereth, welcome
back to the show.
Speaker 1 (09:38):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (09:38):
No, it's my pleasure going to be with you guys.
Speaker 6 (09:41):
See.
Speaker 1 (09:42):
Yeah, thank you, yes, thank you. Yes. By the way,
just when you when you shit your pants, did you reach.
Speaker 3 (09:48):
Out to the people at docal Axe to get a
sponsorship deal? If not, was that like a missed opportunity
for you?
Speaker 1 (09:53):
You regret?
Speaker 2 (09:55):
Yeah, no, I do regret. I could still reach out
to them, because that's you know, I mean, I don't.
I have what we call a really stupid sphincter that
has a definite differentiating between liquid salt and gas. So
duncallets can can fix that for me that.
Speaker 1 (10:08):
Way, that would be perfect.
Speaker 4 (10:10):
That's a natural fit, you know, and heating the word
fit in more than one way.
Speaker 1 (10:15):
Yeah, absolutely, integration. What about depends?
Speaker 3 (10:19):
Did you ever reach out to depend since you pissed
yourself to.
Speaker 2 (10:21):
Yeah, I have not reached out to them either, but
that would be as opportunity control.
Speaker 5 (10:26):
Yeah, natural sponsor.
Speaker 1 (10:27):
You're right exactly left a lot of money on the table. Sad.
Speaker 3 (10:30):
But you know, talking about sad, Mark, that's what we
call a segue.
Speaker 1 (10:34):
In the business. Thank you job.
Speaker 3 (10:35):
You know you're such a supporter of your old Dame Washington,
so biased toward them. You know, we're coming off the
Eagles just thumping them terribly, which leads to a Doulcallex
question of the day. How shitty do you feel right now?
Speaker 5 (10:49):
I feel pretty good.
Speaker 2 (10:51):
I feel really good about what Washington has done, you know,
to fixing, fixing that organization and where they are right now.
But I will tell you I look at the Philadelphia
Eagles after the collapse of last.
Speaker 1 (11:06):
Season, switch to top one, ten.
Speaker 2 (11:09):
And one, and then you know, just collapsing towards the
end and then getting throttled.
Speaker 3 (11:14):
By Tim collapses like your sphinct needs to collapse around the.
Speaker 1 (11:17):
Collapsing like your bowel. Yeah that was last year. That's
in the past. Why are you talking about last year?
Speaker 2 (11:23):
I'm looking at what Well, that's what I'm getting to
that they just have this epic collapse last year, but
where they sit right now and the way the Eagles
are playing overall, I would have to I would have
to venture to guess that I could make a compelling
argument that they are the second best team in the NFL.
Speaker 1 (11:42):
So who's number one? Who's number one?
Speaker 5 (11:45):
I would put Detroit?
Speaker 1 (11:46):
Oh, you know what's number two? Is you?
Speaker 3 (11:50):
You and your pants and your shitty takes all around
to you? By Yeah, can we go back to what
our topic is? You know you you follow a rundown, bro?
We were talking about the Commanders. Okay, let's go back
to your quarterback Jaden Daniels, Right, is it fair?
Speaker 1 (12:09):
At what point can we call him a bust? Was
it week ten or maybe was it week eight? Right now?
Speaker 5 (12:15):
No?
Speaker 2 (12:15):
I think I think that Jaden day is what he's
been able to accomplish. And you know, the last three
or four weeks since he hurt his rib, I can't
remember exactly.
Speaker 5 (12:26):
Maybe it was a Carolina.
Speaker 2 (12:27):
Games like, it's obviously diminished what they do offensively, so that's.
Speaker 5 (12:34):
Hurting more excuses. When Jalen Hurst wasn't able to run.
Speaker 1 (12:38):
The ball, last look at him switch.
Speaker 4 (12:43):
Off lineman the block for the goalways, he's always he's
still defending his quarterback. Yeah yeah, Do you have the
ability to stay on topic everything we talk about the
comand go back to the deflecting Yeah.
Speaker 2 (12:55):
Yeah, yeah, No, I mean, I'm just I'm just giving
examples that you can't operate the entirety of the offense
when the guy is hurt and you can't run him
and he can't really drive the football because.
Speaker 1 (13:07):
Of the more injuries.
Speaker 2 (13:08):
So yeah, they've struggled, but they're sitting at seven and
four right now, and what he's been able to accomplish
his rookie season has been remarkable. I would put him
right now as number two in offensive Rookie of the
Year voting.
Speaker 3 (13:22):
Number two brought to you by Dolcalax, who's number one.
Speaker 5 (13:26):
Bone Knicks of the Denver Broncos.
Speaker 2 (13:29):
Yeah, I mean, bone Knicks is just playing lights out
right now. First rookie quarterback in the history of football
to throw it for eighty percent completion percentage year.
Speaker 1 (13:39):
So we know you played for Washington, you played for PROH.
Speaker 3 (13:43):
He doesn't know what the measurement of every quarterback is
rushing touchdowns. That's why Jalen rushing up will be in
the game bone next, no rushing touchdowns zero?
Speaker 5 (13:53):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (13:54):
The only thing you should be rushing is to the bathroom.
I feel like. Okay, look, look, just so you know,
maybe you need to see stats. Is that what you
need to see?
Speaker 5 (14:02):
Mark? Yeah?
Speaker 3 (14:03):
Okay, okay, we all know the best way to judge
a quarterback is by his last full games. Okay, So
right now, we're gonna play a little game with you.
It's called blind Resume, sponsored by doncal Ax. If you
need to ship yourself blind doncal Ax. All right, that's
it called an integration. Okay, Mark, I'm gonna give you
Jade and Daniels stats through week ten and eleven.
Speaker 1 (14:23):
Okay, you're gonna tell me which QB had the same stats? Okay,
pay attention.
Speaker 3 (14:29):
Completion percentage fifty nine percent, one touchdown, one interception winning
percentage zero point zero? Okay, which QB also had those
same stats?
Speaker 5 (14:44):
Mark? Which QB? I would say, Boy, I don't know.
Speaker 1 (14:53):
You tell me he does? You're asking us. You call
yourself an NFL analyst. Yeah, look, watch watch this, Toty.
What's the answer, you know?
Speaker 4 (15:03):
I'm gonna say Jets QB Bryce Petty in twenty sixteen.
Speaker 3 (15:10):
He's sitting right there, Bryce Petty and twenty sixteen. So
isn't it fair based on that to say Jayden Daniels
is now twenty sixteen?
Speaker 1 (15:18):
Bryce Petty?
Speaker 2 (15:20):
Uh yeah, well I mean on that on that two
game sample set, Yeah, that would be.
Speaker 1 (15:26):
All right, there you go, yes, go see now there
you go. That's see day. Now he's getting there.
Speaker 3 (15:32):
And now it's time for the doncal Axe probing question mark.
All right, we're going to be making one hundred k
doing this, just so we're Claire. You won't be making
any money, but you will get to be in the
social clip. Okay, Okay, Yeah, if you can mention Doncalects
in your answer, that would be ideal, as it's part
of our contract.
Speaker 1 (15:48):
Okay.
Speaker 3 (15:49):
This week, the Commanders play the Cowboys. If the Commanders lose,
how much will you shot your pants?
Speaker 5 (15:56):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (15:57):
If the Commanders lose to the Cowboys, Because the Cowboys
are the poster child of docallex when it comes to
crap in your pants, Yeah that is the Cowboys are
just flat out awful. And I love when Jerry Jones
comes out and says, efforts not an issue.
Speaker 5 (16:16):
I could throw you.
Speaker 2 (16:17):
I could throw I mean, I just watched the guy,
I didn't even study the game.
Speaker 5 (16:20):
I just watched the game.
Speaker 2 (16:21):
I could show you effort being an issue with the
Dallas Cowboys. So the Dallas Cowboys come out and win
this game when their players are making videos at the
club two hours after they're done, you know, getting throttled. Listen,
Cowboys have zero chance of beating the Commanders.
Speaker 5 (16:39):
The Commanders are still.
Speaker 3 (16:41):
Playing, just like you have zero chance of holding it
a ship with the collects.
Speaker 1 (16:45):
Keep going, yeah, yeah, they have zero.
Speaker 5 (16:47):
They have debsolutely zero chance, absolutely no chance. So see, yeah,
the Commanders is gonna win this one.
Speaker 1 (16:52):
Walking away the terrific analysis.
Speaker 3 (16:55):
I used to think you weren't that good at an
NFL analysts, but be perfectly honest, but I'll do that.
Speaker 1 (17:00):
I'm changing my mind. So hey, let's ask your risk question.
Speaker 3 (17:03):
Okay, let's say the Eagles don't play the Lions in
the NFC Championship game. Using your NFL analysis skills, what
will the final score of that that game be? Now,
think carefully before you answer.
Speaker 4 (17:16):
Remember remember remember Nick Sirianni has a shaved head now too,
so forget about last season.
Speaker 1 (17:23):
He has a shaved shaved at six and oh with
the shaved head.
Speaker 2 (17:26):
Yeah six, and oh, well, then he should because it's
starting to grow back. I watched him at practice. I
saw the practice video, So shouldn't he reshave the head now?
Speaker 5 (17:36):
Like at what point?
Speaker 3 (17:37):
Yeah, we are watching the head very carefully measuring every day.
Speaker 1 (17:41):
Yeah, bro, yeah, okay, all right.
Speaker 2 (17:42):
I would say it would be a score of let's
call it thirty five thirty one.
Speaker 4 (17:50):
Okay, so Eagles win thirty five thirty one.
Speaker 5 (17:53):
I would go with I would pick Detroit.
Speaker 3 (17:56):
But oh oh yeah, if you want to talk lions,
you're a lion. When we said you're a good NFL analyst.
Speaker 1 (18:02):
Yeah, guess what? Guess what time the ship you off
the show? Like you're sharing you can't even learn.
Speaker 4 (18:13):
We try and teach you, just like that local as
ship you off to show?
Speaker 1 (18:20):
Is he awful? Line? Jay, hang up.
Speaker 3 (18:22):
The phone, you know, talking about fake He's stunk up
that entire segment.
Speaker 1 (18:26):
Dowdy all around.
Speaker 4 (18:27):
Yeah, just like you'll stink up the bathroom after taking
dulcal axe.
Speaker 3 (18:33):
Great way to say, it's that's a professional talk about
you're kidding me.
Speaker 1 (18:38):
Talk about someone like spoke producing do you want.
Speaker 6 (18:46):
You couldn't remember the name of the guy who runs Amazon.
Speaker 3 (18:50):
I know it.
Speaker 1 (18:51):
It's on the tip of my tongue. Yeah, I know
it to you.
Speaker 6 (18:53):
Yeah, no, you clearly don't know it. The guy who
runs Amazon is Jeff Bezos. You might be like the
only two idiots on the planet who don't know his name.
Speaker 4 (19:03):
Oh well, you're gonna be the guy who runs from
my acts. Yeah, just like Amazon. I'm gonna be delivering
a package between your mother's legs.
Speaker 6 (19:13):
Oh wow, you said the Netflix movie with Sydney Sweeney
was anyone but her.
Speaker 1 (19:24):
Yeah. I mean I didn't watch it or anything. I
wouldn't be called dead watching it.
Speaker 6 (19:28):
So yeah, well when you mentioned it, you got the
title wrong. It's anyone but you.
Speaker 4 (19:34):
Oh, I see, as in who we want as a producer,
anyone but you. Yeah, and after the show, I'm going
to sid nee you and the balls. Oh oh, he's
still talking.
Speaker 6 (19:47):
What I didn't see any emails or paperwork about this
docal Axe deal.
Speaker 1 (19:52):
Okay, that's on you. Yeah, there were tons of emails, Broe.
Speaker 6 (19:55):
I saw you send them, like five emails, but they
never responded, so there's no deal.
Speaker 3 (20:01):
Oh yeah, well you know who won't be responding you
after I bludgeon you.
Speaker 4 (20:06):
Yeah, you know what me and Dolcalects have in common.
We've both been inside your mom Oh great one.
Speaker 3 (20:14):
And you know who's gonna be inside this show next week?
Get this just booked super Bowl hero, Eagles legend, future
Hall of Fame, and Nick Foles will be Wow. I
don't forget Rare to review this show on Apple Podcast.
Go through that and shop the murders, visit the merch
talk lick the Lincoln, inspire them, Donty, great job as always,
(20:35):
Same to.
Speaker 1 (20:36):
You, Pauly, another floorless show.
Speaker 3 (20:39):
There yougo.
Speaker 1 (20:39):
We'll see you people next week. See you
All right, alright, Govin do you're live from Philly. It's
the number one rated poly Toni Foo.
Speaker 2 (00:13):
Yo.
Speaker 3 (00:14):
As always poly Fools go here with Tony Foolsco and
Tony Huge show today. You know, and the people, these morons,
they always say this is the most biased inaccurate show
in all the media. Did you ever think people that
you're the one who's biased against the show?
Speaker 4 (00:31):
Yeah, go look in the mirror, unless you're driving right now,
then you know, Wait till you're at a stoplight, then look.
Speaker 3 (00:37):
Yeah, but you know, just to prove we're not biased,
wait until you hear our take on the Giant's QB situation.
Speaker 1 (00:42):
That'll shut you up.
Speaker 3 (00:44):
Let's talking about shutting up the people, Tonty, these idiots
complaining about the Tyson fight. Still, we'll tell you why
you've completely missed the obvious point. And Joel Embiid under
attack for doing absolutely nothing wrong. It's crazy why And
our guest today we'll talk about bias. Tony, the biggest
Washington Homer whoever lived. You know, we're gonna see how
(01:05):
miserable his life is now that the Commanders suck like
usual again getting blown out by the Eagles three times.
Super Bowl champ Mark Schlereth will be joining the show. Yeah,
and then promptly getting kicked off the show.
Speaker 1 (01:17):
Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 3 (01:18):
And by the way, we do have one big announcement, Tony,
very exciting for us. You know, a couple of weeks back,
we did what they call a branded integration with Defends
under Gods and well that was so successful for them,
stock shooting through the roof for them that today we
are announcing a deal with our new presenting sponsor, dolcal Ax,
the number one anal suppository in the business. What does
(01:42):
this mean for you? You're probably wondering nothing. Nothing, I viewing
your listening experience won't change your bit exactly. Sure you
might hear and add at due for dol Collects during
the show, but you probably won't even notice that.
Speaker 1 (01:55):
No, they're not even going to notice a little bit.
Speaker 4 (01:57):
So just sit back and relax, just like when you
put a dolkal axe up your.
Speaker 1 (02:02):
Ass, exactly.
Speaker 3 (02:04):
With that being said, so much to get those So
let's get right into a top story story drama in Philadelphia,
conflict breaking out on the Sixers as Dirase Maxi reportedly
came after Joe l Embiid for his constant tardiness, ridiculous
showing up late to six's day meetings, practices, everything else.
(02:24):
But Dowdy, I think it's totally clear that Tyrese Maxi
is the one who's out of line here.
Speaker 1 (02:30):
Absolutely.
Speaker 4 (02:31):
I think it's great that Joel Embiid is late to
everything after all those knee surgeries. We need him moving
as slowly and gingerly as possible anytime he's off the court.
To me, if he shows up two hours late for
a practice, he's right on time.
Speaker 1 (02:48):
Yup.
Speaker 3 (02:48):
And what do we always say is the key to
players succeeding in this modern NBA.
Speaker 4 (02:53):
Rest exactly And frankly, I think Embiid is being a
great leader here by showing up late to everything, he's
showing a total lack of urgency because he understands that
in the NBA it makes no sense to start caring
until like round two of the playoffs.
Speaker 1 (03:11):
Couldn't agree more, Dody.
Speaker 3 (03:12):
And also, you have you ever seen a tall person
try and get into a car? Takes for these short
people like Tyrese Maxie. They don't see what an unfair
advantage they have.
Speaker 4 (03:25):
You know, that's sizesm I'd like to see Tyrese Maxi
walking Joe Lmba's shoes for just one day. He'd be
late for everything because the shoes wouldn't fit and he'd
keep tripping over himself.
Speaker 1 (03:37):
Watch how slow he'd be, then.
Speaker 3 (03:39):
Watch how slow he'd be late for everything. Undeniable analysis
that Donny and now do there's Mike Tyson Jake ballfight.
You know, there's a lot being said about this fight still,
even though.
Speaker 1 (03:48):
Nobody cares anymore.
Speaker 3 (03:50):
But what if the main criticisms has been aimed at
Netflix and it's streaming issues, which you know, cause the
broadcast to stop loading for many people. These critics of
the Netflix, they're missing the point.
Speaker 4 (04:02):
Doesn't anyone realize that Netflix was deliberately causing all those
technical issues to save people from having to watch that fight.
They know how bad it was gonna be, so they
were trying to keep people from watching it.
Speaker 1 (04:16):
You know this has happened before. One time I tried
to watch.
Speaker 4 (04:19):
That Sydney Sweeney movie anyone but her, and it wouldn't load.
I later found out that Netflix executives were so embarrassed
by that piece of hot garbage that they call a movie,
they personally came to my house and cut my internet
line so that I couldn't see it and therefore couldn't
(04:40):
cancel my Netflix subscription.
Speaker 3 (04:43):
Just tremendous first person insight that, Tony. And well, now
let's finally get to NFL News. Of course, the big
story there Nick Sirianni six and oh since shaving his head,
Now people are saying this is just a coincidence that
he shaved his head and they started winning. No, I
mean all you gotta wonder about the science behind it.
You know, with all that hair on your head, maybe
(05:04):
the brain just you know, it drains the resources with
all the hair growing, and the brain could put more
resources towards thinking.
Speaker 4 (05:12):
Absolutely, just look at the greatest basketball player ever, Michael
Jordan's exactly bald, greatest boxer ever, Floyd Bald, greatest actor
of all time, Vin Easy Bald, the greatest businessman who ever.
Speaker 1 (05:31):
Lived, and it's Amazon guy y yeah.
Speaker 4 (05:34):
Bald, the greatest comedian ever, Howie Manel, yeah Bald. And
you know, I hate to say it, but maybe if
Albert Einstein had shaved his head, he could have been
a whole lot smarter.
Speaker 3 (05:48):
You just hate to think about what was left on
the table then, just you know, not in Einstein exactly. Anyway,
the other big news out of the NFL don't e
the Giants finally admitting their mistake benching Daniel Jones in
favor of Tommy DeVito. Tony, you know people they say
we're biased against other teams in the division. Now we're
(06:09):
gonna show you how good Tommy DeVito is. It's time
for a segment we do on the show that is
totally original.
Speaker 1 (06:16):
IP.
Speaker 3 (06:17):
It's called them a blind resume, brought to you by
Dolcalax when you want to totally shit yourself blind Dolcalax.
Speaker 1 (06:24):
Okay, well you know how this works, Tony.
Speaker 3 (06:26):
I'm gonna show you Tommy DeVito's stats on the left
side of the screen, and on the right, I'm going
to show you the stats of a mystery quarterback and
you you're going to try to guess who that other
QB is. All right, you're ready, Tony, yup, Let's do
it blind.
Speaker 1 (06:42):
Okay, let's compare hare.
Speaker 3 (06:43):
All right, Completion percentage Tommy DeVito sixty four percent, this
other QB fifty nine point four percent. Okay, passer rating
de Vito eighty nine point two, this other guy eighty
six point four Okay, finally interceptions DeVito just three this
(07:04):
other guy two hundred and fifty two.
Speaker 1 (07:06):
Okay, Donty, who is this other quarterback? You know I'm stumped.
I gotta say, I don't know who is it? Get
ready for this, Doty? The answer is Dan Marino. There
you go.
Speaker 3 (07:20):
This shows you Tommy DeVito already better than Dan Marine.
Speaker 4 (07:25):
Wow. You know got to say total head scratch and
move here by the giants that they haven't been starting
this guy from the.
Speaker 1 (07:32):
Get go, from the get go. Exactly, yeah, exactly.
Speaker 3 (07:36):
You know your people probably didn't notice at home wherever
you're listening, but we just made one hundred thousand dollars
might just like, don't in fact, Doty, why don't we
just go for more?
Speaker 5 (07:45):
Here?
Speaker 3 (07:46):
Let's do another what they call a branded integration. Okay,
this is where we do a sports segment, but we
we work the product in so seedlessly that you don't
even know it's an app.
Speaker 1 (07:55):
You don't even know yet made millions.
Speaker 3 (07:57):
Okay, so it's now time for the Dolcalas Shittiest Performance
of the Week. When you need a shitty performance, dolcal Axe. Okay, Tony,
who wins the award this week?
Speaker 4 (08:09):
The Dallas Cowboys, who set an NFL record with six
straight home games where they were behind by at least
twenty points. And there's nothing worse than falling behind that
far on points or daily shits.
Speaker 1 (08:22):
The Cowboys just can't seem.
Speaker 4 (08:24):
To get going, like an old constipated man on the toilet. Now,
they always find themselves trailing, just like you'll find yourself
leaving a trail of shit once you take dolcal As.
Speaker 3 (08:36):
You know, Tony, I gotta say, I honestly forgot you
were doing an ad until you said docal Ax right there.
Speaker 4 (08:42):
It was just so seamlessly baked right into the content. Yeah,
totally great job that, Dody.
Speaker 1 (08:48):
And I see our guess is coming on the line.
Speaker 3 (08:51):
So let's bring him on the full skol Satellite Network
sponsored by dolcal As.
Speaker 5 (08:56):
Fullsk Satellite Net Woke.
Speaker 3 (08:58):
Okay, welcome to our guest segment sponsored by dolcal As.
Speaker 1 (09:03):
When you need to ship dolcal.
Speaker 3 (09:05):
Axe and how appropriate today because our guest known by
the nickname Stink. You know, right, because you pissed and
ship your pants right during a game that happened.
Speaker 5 (09:14):
Uh well, yeah I pissed my pants. I didn't I
didn't ship myself, although just for you shit.
Speaker 3 (09:20):
Yourself that you yeah, yeah, okay, yeah yeah. Anyway, other
than that, less importantly, you did win three Super Bowls
with Washington and Denver as an offensive lineman. Now you
can see this guy every morning f S one's new
show breakfast Ball.
Speaker 1 (09:34):
He's on there.
Speaker 3 (09:35):
All right, let's bring him in here, Mark Schlereth, welcome
back to the show.
Speaker 1 (09:38):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (09:38):
No, it's my pleasure going to be with you guys.
Speaker 6 (09:41):
See.
Speaker 1 (09:42):
Yeah, thank you, yes, thank you. Yes. By the way,
just when you when you shit your pants, did you reach.
Speaker 3 (09:48):
Out to the people at docal Axe to get a
sponsorship deal? If not, was that like a missed opportunity
for you?
Speaker 1 (09:53):
You regret?
Speaker 2 (09:55):
Yeah, no, I do regret. I could still reach out
to them, because that's you know, I mean, I don't.
I have what we call a really stupid sphincter that
has a definite differentiating between liquid salt and gas. So
duncallets can can fix that for me that.
Speaker 1 (10:08):
Way, that would be perfect.
Speaker 4 (10:10):
That's a natural fit, you know, and heating the word
fit in more than one way.
Speaker 1 (10:15):
Yeah, absolutely, integration. What about depends?
Speaker 3 (10:19):
Did you ever reach out to depend since you pissed
yourself to.
Speaker 2 (10:21):
Yeah, I have not reached out to them either, but
that would be as opportunity control.
Speaker 5 (10:26):
Yeah, natural sponsor.
Speaker 1 (10:27):
You're right exactly left a lot of money on the table. Sad.
Speaker 3 (10:30):
But you know, talking about sad, Mark, that's what we
call a segue.
Speaker 1 (10:34):
In the business. Thank you job.
Speaker 3 (10:35):
You know you're such a supporter of your old Dame Washington,
so biased toward them. You know, we're coming off the
Eagles just thumping them terribly, which leads to a Doulcallex
question of the day. How shitty do you feel right now?
Speaker 5 (10:49):
I feel pretty good.
Speaker 2 (10:51):
I feel really good about what Washington has done, you know,
to fixing, fixing that organization and where they are right now.
But I will tell you I look at the Philadelphia
Eagles after the collapse of last.
Speaker 1 (11:06):
Season, switch to top one, ten.
Speaker 2 (11:09):
And one, and then you know, just collapsing towards the
end and then getting throttled.
Speaker 3 (11:14):
By Tim collapses like your sphinct needs to collapse around the.
Speaker 1 (11:17):
Collapsing like your bowel. Yeah that was last year. That's
in the past. Why are you talking about last year?
Speaker 2 (11:23):
I'm looking at what Well, that's what I'm getting to
that they just have this epic collapse last year, but
where they sit right now and the way the Eagles
are playing overall, I would have to I would have
to venture to guess that I could make a compelling
argument that they are the second best team in the NFL.
Speaker 1 (11:42):
So who's number one? Who's number one?
Speaker 5 (11:45):
I would put Detroit?
Speaker 1 (11:46):
Oh, you know what's number two? Is you?
Speaker 3 (11:50):
You and your pants and your shitty takes all around
to you? By Yeah, can we go back to what
our topic is? You know you you follow a rundown, bro?
We were talking about the Commanders. Okay, let's go back
to your quarterback Jaden Daniels, Right, is it fair?
Speaker 1 (12:09):
At what point can we call him a bust? Was
it week ten or maybe was it week eight? Right now?
Speaker 5 (12:15):
No?
Speaker 2 (12:15):
I think I think that Jaden day is what he's
been able to accomplish. And you know, the last three
or four weeks since he hurt his rib, I can't
remember exactly.
Speaker 5 (12:26):
Maybe it was a Carolina.
Speaker 2 (12:27):
Games like, it's obviously diminished what they do offensively, so that's.
Speaker 5 (12:34):
Hurting more excuses. When Jalen Hurst wasn't able to run.
Speaker 1 (12:38):
The ball, last look at him switch.
Speaker 4 (12:43):
Off lineman the block for the goalways, he's always he's
still defending his quarterback. Yeah yeah, Do you have the
ability to stay on topic everything we talk about the
comand go back to the deflecting Yeah.
Speaker 2 (12:55):
Yeah, yeah, No, I mean, I'm just I'm just giving
examples that you can't operate the entirety of the offense
when the guy is hurt and you can't run him
and he can't really drive the football because.
Speaker 1 (13:07):
Of the more injuries.
Speaker 2 (13:08):
So yeah, they've struggled, but they're sitting at seven and
four right now, and what he's been able to accomplish
his rookie season has been remarkable. I would put him
right now as number two in offensive Rookie of the
Year voting.
Speaker 3 (13:22):
Number two brought to you by Dolcalax, who's number one.
Speaker 5 (13:26):
Bone Knicks of the Denver Broncos.
Speaker 2 (13:29):
Yeah, I mean, bone Knicks is just playing lights out
right now. First rookie quarterback in the history of football
to throw it for eighty percent completion percentage year.
Speaker 1 (13:39):
So we know you played for Washington, you played for PROH.
Speaker 3 (13:43):
He doesn't know what the measurement of every quarterback is
rushing touchdowns. That's why Jalen rushing up will be in
the game bone next, no rushing touchdowns zero?
Speaker 5 (13:53):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (13:54):
The only thing you should be rushing is to the bathroom.
I feel like. Okay, look, look, just so you know,
maybe you need to see stats. Is that what you
need to see?
Speaker 5 (14:02):
Mark? Yeah?
Speaker 3 (14:03):
Okay, okay, we all know the best way to judge
a quarterback is by his last full games. Okay, So
right now, we're gonna play a little game with you.
It's called blind Resume, sponsored by doncal Ax. If you
need to ship yourself blind doncal Ax. All right, that's
it called an integration. Okay, Mark, I'm gonna give you
Jade and Daniels stats through week ten and eleven.
Speaker 1 (14:23):
Okay, you're gonna tell me which QB had the same stats? Okay,
pay attention.
Speaker 3 (14:29):
Completion percentage fifty nine percent, one touchdown, one interception winning
percentage zero point zero? Okay, which QB also had those
same stats?
Speaker 5 (14:44):
Mark? Which QB? I would say, Boy, I don't know.
Speaker 1 (14:53):
You tell me he does? You're asking us. You call
yourself an NFL analyst. Yeah, look, watch watch this, Toty.
What's the answer, you know?
Speaker 4 (15:03):
I'm gonna say Jets QB Bryce Petty in twenty sixteen.
Speaker 3 (15:10):
He's sitting right there, Bryce Petty and twenty sixteen. So
isn't it fair based on that to say Jayden Daniels
is now twenty sixteen?
Speaker 1 (15:18):
Bryce Petty?
Speaker 2 (15:20):
Uh yeah, well I mean on that on that two
game sample set, Yeah, that would be.
Speaker 1 (15:26):
All right, there you go, yes, go see now there
you go. That's see day. Now he's getting there.
Speaker 3 (15:32):
And now it's time for the doncal Axe probing question mark.
All right, we're going to be making one hundred k
doing this, just so we're Claire. You won't be making
any money, but you will get to be in the
social clip. Okay, Okay, Yeah, if you can mention Doncalects
in your answer, that would be ideal, as it's part
of our contract.
Speaker 1 (15:48):
Okay.
Speaker 3 (15:49):
This week, the Commanders play the Cowboys. If the Commanders lose,
how much will you shot your pants?
Speaker 5 (15:56):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (15:57):
If the Commanders lose to the Cowboys, Because the Cowboys
are the poster child of docallex when it comes to
crap in your pants, Yeah that is the Cowboys are
just flat out awful. And I love when Jerry Jones
comes out and says, efforts not an issue.
Speaker 5 (16:16):
I could throw you.
Speaker 2 (16:17):
I could throw I mean, I just watched the guy,
I didn't even study the game.
Speaker 5 (16:20):
I just watched the game.
Speaker 2 (16:21):
I could show you effort being an issue with the
Dallas Cowboys. So the Dallas Cowboys come out and win
this game when their players are making videos at the
club two hours after they're done, you know, getting throttled. Listen,
Cowboys have zero chance of beating the Commanders.
Speaker 5 (16:39):
The Commanders are still.
Speaker 3 (16:41):
Playing, just like you have zero chance of holding it
a ship with the collects.
Speaker 1 (16:45):
Keep going, yeah, yeah, they have zero.
Speaker 5 (16:47):
They have debsolutely zero chance, absolutely no chance. So see, yeah,
the Commanders is gonna win this one.
Speaker 1 (16:52):
Walking away the terrific analysis.
Speaker 3 (16:55):
I used to think you weren't that good at an
NFL analysts, but be perfectly honest, but I'll do that.
Speaker 1 (17:00):
I'm changing my mind. So hey, let's ask your risk question.
Speaker 3 (17:03):
Okay, let's say the Eagles don't play the Lions in
the NFC Championship game. Using your NFL analysis skills, what
will the final score of that that game be? Now,
think carefully before you answer.
Speaker 4 (17:16):
Remember remember remember Nick Sirianni has a shaved head now too,
so forget about last season.
Speaker 1 (17:23):
He has a shaved shaved at six and oh with
the shaved head.
Speaker 2 (17:26):
Yeah six, and oh, well, then he should because it's
starting to grow back. I watched him at practice. I
saw the practice video, So shouldn't he reshave the head now?
Speaker 5 (17:36):
Like at what point?
Speaker 3 (17:37):
Yeah, we are watching the head very carefully measuring every day.
Speaker 1 (17:41):
Yeah, bro, yeah, okay, all right.
Speaker 2 (17:42):
I would say it would be a score of let's
call it thirty five thirty one.
Speaker 4 (17:50):
Okay, so Eagles win thirty five thirty one.
Speaker 5 (17:53):
I would go with I would pick Detroit.
Speaker 3 (17:56):
But oh oh yeah, if you want to talk lions,
you're a lion. When we said you're a good NFL analyst.
Speaker 1 (18:02):
Yeah, guess what? Guess what time the ship you off
the show? Like you're sharing you can't even learn.
Speaker 4 (18:13):
We try and teach you, just like that local as
ship you off to show?
Speaker 1 (18:20):
Is he awful? Line? Jay, hang up.
Speaker 3 (18:22):
The phone, you know, talking about fake He's stunk up
that entire segment.
Speaker 1 (18:26):
Dowdy all around.
Speaker 4 (18:27):
Yeah, just like you'll stink up the bathroom after taking
dulcal axe.
Speaker 3 (18:33):
Great way to say, it's that's a professional talk about
you're kidding me.
Speaker 1 (18:38):
Talk about someone like spoke producing do you want.
Speaker 6 (18:46):
You couldn't remember the name of the guy who runs Amazon.
Speaker 3 (18:50):
I know it.
Speaker 1 (18:51):
It's on the tip of my tongue. Yeah, I know
it to you.
Speaker 6 (18:53):
Yeah, no, you clearly don't know it. The guy who
runs Amazon is Jeff Bezos. You might be like the
only two idiots on the planet who don't know his name.
Speaker 4 (19:03):
Oh well, you're gonna be the guy who runs from
my acts. Yeah, just like Amazon. I'm gonna be delivering
a package between your mother's legs.
Speaker 6 (19:13):
Oh wow, you said the Netflix movie with Sydney Sweeney
was anyone but her.
Speaker 1 (19:24):
Yeah. I mean I didn't watch it or anything. I
wouldn't be called dead watching it.
Speaker 6 (19:28):
So yeah, well when you mentioned it, you got the
title wrong. It's anyone but you.
Speaker 4 (19:34):
Oh, I see, as in who we want as a producer,
anyone but you. Yeah, and after the show, I'm going
to sid nee you and the balls. Oh oh, he's
still talking.
Speaker 6 (19:47):
What I didn't see any emails or paperwork about this
docal Axe deal.
Speaker 1 (19:52):
Okay, that's on you. Yeah, there were tons of emails, Broe.
Speaker 6 (19:55):
I saw you send them, like five emails, but they
never responded, so there's no deal.
Speaker 3 (20:01):
Oh yeah, well you know who won't be responding you
after I bludgeon you.
Speaker 4 (20:06):
Yeah, you know what me and Dolcalects have in common.
We've both been inside your mom Oh great one.
Speaker 3 (20:14):
And you know who's gonna be inside this show next week?
Get this just booked super Bowl hero, Eagles legend, future
Hall of Fame, and Nick Foles will be Wow. I
don't forget Rare to review this show on Apple Podcast.
Go through that and shop the murders, visit the merch
talk lick the Lincoln, inspire them, Donty, great job as always,
(20:35):
Same to.
Speaker 1 (20:36):
You, Pauly, another floorless show.
Speaker 3 (20:39):
There yougo.
Speaker 1 (20:39):
We'll see you people next week. See you
Fox Sports Radio News
Host
Jonas Knox
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