November 7, 2025 • 22 mins
On the Friday November 7, 2025 edition of The Armstrong & Getty One More Thing Podcast...
- a very, very candid Jack Armstrong talks his latest dating experiences.
Stupid Should Hurt: https://www.armstrongandgetty.com/
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
I choose the topic, then it's ask me anything, one
more thing. I'm one more thing. I was trying to
decide how to present this information. I'm hesitant to do it.
I have a feeling I'm gonna wish I hadn't. Uh.
Speaker 2 (00:19):
Oh boy.
Speaker 1 (00:20):
I've always been quite willing to share lots about my
personal life on the air, for better or worse. I
have trouble not talking about things more than the other
way around. I get that, but I will. I will
share this all. Just I'm gonna lay out the topic
and then I think ask me anything would be the
(00:41):
best way to approach it. You guys can just interview
me on the.
Speaker 2 (00:44):
Topic, Okay, right, which does not it's not called I
will answer anything.
Speaker 1 (00:49):
No, that's plenty out. Yeah, yeah, fair enough. Two months
ago I entered the war. I'm embarrassed about this, by
the way. Oh boy, I'm embarrassed of this. I feel
bad about myself, but it's true. Anyway. Two months ago,
I entered the world of online dating.
Speaker 2 (01:09):
Okay, okay, by that I embarrassed by that, Yes I am,
because I had been saying for many, many years, we're
older than you, Katie.
Speaker 1 (01:18):
You have grown up in a world where this is common.
I used to we used to regularly say on the air,
it's r O D at reeks of desperation, people who
are online dating times of change, times of change. Then
the numbers become the numbers have become overwhelming, and it's
just practically what everybody does. And uh, and I had,
(01:41):
as a single guy, realized, at some point, I go
to work, and then I go straight home and take
care of kids, and then I get up and go
to work again. And unless I end up in a
car crash with somebody roughly my age, it's also single
and I didn't cause the car, so they're not angry
at me. It's hard to imagine how I'm going to
(02:03):
run into anybody. I got chocolate in my peanut butter. Yeah,
it almost has to be one of those.
Speaker 3 (02:07):
Yeah, to do very slow fender benders, like five miles
an hour, just enough so none of the cars are damage.
Speaker 4 (02:13):
To you just have to start seeing cute girls and
crashing into us.
Speaker 2 (02:18):
Oh, we probably ought to see if there's a little damage.
I'm so sorry. I'm a man who's willing to say
he's sorry when he's wrong. Hi, my name's Jack.
Speaker 1 (02:24):
That's not a bad idea, I buy like a two
thousand and eight Corolla. No, I don't care if it
gets a few dents later a minute major dents, yeah,
grocery store sort of. Just oh dang, I wasn't looking,
but you're driving.
Speaker 2 (02:38):
A seventeen year old Corona.
Speaker 1 (02:40):
That would make me less appealing, wouldn't it is. I'm
still surprised that so many young people are doing online dating,
because I would think you'd still have the social structure.
You're going out a lot, and you know, with lots
of other people who singing, so you can still run
into people the normal Wait, no, no, they.
Speaker 5 (02:58):
Lack the social skills.
Speaker 4 (03:00):
I know so many young twenty somethings that are on
like five different apps.
Speaker 5 (03:05):
It's amazing to me.
Speaker 2 (03:06):
Well, I haven't done whether just a hookup or they
just they don't have the social skills to try to
get acquainted with somebody they don't know.
Speaker 1 (03:15):
Yeah, I'm on one app. Bumble. I chose that after
a little bit of research. They're almost all all except
for two, are owned by the same company. Now match
dot Com went up out and bought all of the
names you've heard of of online dating, and they're all
owned by one company. Now, and there is a great
belief among people that have been doing it for years.
(03:36):
I've been doing it for eight weeks, but for people
who have been doing it for years that it's much
worse than it used to be. That the algorithms are
designed to keep you on there because you pay a
whatever it is, sixty dollars a month, and then you
pay per like liking somebody or whatever you buy likes. Anyway,
it's a great revenue stream, and there'd be great incentive
for the company to try to keep that going rather
(03:57):
than hey, we found it are we know who you
would like and they knew, we put you together, and
then you leave the app and we never make another
set from you, or we can dribble along people that
kind of might be interesting to you.
Speaker 2 (04:10):
Yeah. Please that the incentive structure.
Speaker 1 (04:13):
Is pretty easy to rit. Yes it is, Yes, for
what it's worth.
Speaker 2 (04:17):
On the recent season of Only Murders in the Building,
the Steve Martin character is on various dating apps for
older folks, and I can't remember all the names of them,
but one of them is last gasp dot com.
Speaker 1 (04:31):
That's funny. So anybody get any questions about this, I
am you. How's it going, Okay, how's it going.
Speaker 2 (04:40):
So, do you have a very broad a detailed profile
up there?
Speaker 1 (04:43):
I do have a detailed profile. I am doing incognito mode.
I don't know if it's necessary or not. I remember
one of the things that sparked in my head, the
idea that maybe somebody I would be doing this when
I was single is I heard Chris Rock talking about it.
He said people were amazing to find me on I
forget what he was on, hinge ormatch dot com or
(05:04):
something like that, and he said with my name. He said,
I'm on there with my name because that's my name.
I'm single and I'm looking for someone to date and
that's my name. So that's kind of what I did.
But I have I do have a profile on there.
I'm doing incognito mode, which is you're not out in
the world for everybody to see you. I didn't want
to do that.
Speaker 5 (05:23):
It's like only your matches can see you.
Speaker 1 (05:25):
Only people I see and then like yeah, I think
I'm interested, and then they get back. It's been both
good and bad that so few people are aware of
the Armstrong and Getty Show in general. I mean, I've
had a handful of I know who you are and
are all excited about that, But an awful lot of
(05:49):
and mostly the reason that the majority of the reason
people don't know because at some point, very quickly, you
get into what do you do for a living? I
mean that's a very common early question, right.
Speaker 3 (05:59):
Hum.
Speaker 1 (06:01):
It's people who just don't follow the news at all,
that is most of it. They wouldn't. It's not that
they like a different radio show, they don't listen to
talk radio, they don't follow news, they don't fall politics.
I've chatted with so many people that are completely checked
out of that world, and I think, wow, that's interesting
(06:21):
and refreshing in many ways.
Speaker 2 (06:22):
Yeah. I listened to Q one O three soft hits
of today and yesterday, Right, that sort of person.
Speaker 1 (06:28):
Yeah, And there are a ton of people, as we've
talked about on the air, who have absolutely no MAGA
or if you voted for Trump, swipe which is it
right or left? I should figure that out.
Speaker 2 (06:40):
This is you can keep ending up with truck drivers.
Speaker 4 (06:43):
Does your profile have anything about your political leaning on it?
Speaker 1 (06:46):
I have myself as a moderate, which is true and
certainly in terms of my ability to be in a
relationship with somebody I am unless you're unless you're like
adamant about certain things and won't even and have to
talk about it all the time. I don't really care
that much about your politics.
Speaker 2 (07:07):
Well, right, it's funny because I would be a a
what do you call it to if we don't go
to war like Muhammad Ali, a conscientious objector to the
very question. I am a moderate in terms of getting
together with a woman I hit it off with, and
we care about each other. I couldn't give a crap.
Let's run our lives and if we differ on this
(07:28):
other stuff, let's just not talk about it. And most
well I should in real life. Of course, I'm a
proud fascist, but.
Speaker 1 (07:36):
Around I know a lot of people that seem to
have that attitude. Although there was one woman like the
best connection in terms of chatting that I had early on.
We're going back and forth and like the same books
and have been to the same museums and all this
different starts stopping all that, and we even got far
as far as to like facetiming each other and having
real conversations in real life and everything like that. Wow,
this is over a couple of weeks. And then I
(07:58):
was going to drive to Meeter, we're gonna eat for coffee.
So this had had made it pretty far by these standards,
and she said, you know, I can't believe I haven't
even asked this yet. I should ask what your political
leanings are. And I thought, okay, oh boy, and I
said I'm a moderate lean right, And her response is, oh,
that's way too far from where I am. This is
never gonna work. Well. I enjoyed talking to you, too bad.
(08:20):
I mean it was that quickly over after weeks of discussing,
face timing, talking about our kids, I mean, just like
really got to know each other a lot. She finds
out I'm moderate leaning right, that's way too far from
where I am. Now you Matrix dodged that bullet, yeah,
which which makes her a nut job. But how how
nuts is that?
Speaker 2 (08:40):
She will never hear this? But you have maneuvered yourself
and your own mind into a terribly sad position.
Speaker 1 (08:47):
My dear, no feeling for you.
Speaker 2 (08:49):
I pity you, no kidding. Yeah, a lot of people have.
Speaker 1 (08:55):
And and how would you not get past the fact
that we've been talking for weeks about raising kids and
jobs and things we like to do, things that really matter,
things that really matter. In your life, and they all
clicked really really well. But on voting day once a year,
the fact that we disagree, we couldn't possibly even sit
(09:16):
down for cast. She wasn't even willing to have coffee
with me once she found out. I leaned right.
Speaker 2 (09:21):
And to put a finer point on it, you've gone
through all of the steps you go through to make
sure somebody's not abhorrent. Right, You've decided this person is
not abhorrent. Then it turns out they disagree with you
somewhat on politics, and you decide, yes, they're abhorrent. You
have put politics far too high in your list of
(09:42):
you know, how you define people.
Speaker 1 (09:43):
That one blew my mind.
Speaker 2 (09:45):
Yeah, and I think about politics in the greater sense
principle and ideas and that sort of thing more than
is healthy. And I think that's insane, where I am
just the opposite. If she had said she's a progressive,
which is, you know, an indication of pretty far left.
Having had the conversations we had, I would have thought, well,
(10:07):
that's fine. I mean, given everything we've just talked about
with raising kids and how we feel about marriage and
life and jobs and blah blah blah, that's because you're saying, yeah,
I thought that was damned interesting. All right, So I
ask you anything you have perhaps in the past run
into similar dynamics politically speak like a left lefty.
Speaker 1 (10:30):
Yeah, I did have a girlfriend who was a left
lefty for a while.
Speaker 2 (10:33):
Can you get past that these days? Even with your ID?
Speaker 1 (10:36):
Actually, this person was this particular person who was very
very nice, but also very adamant about the positions and
talked about it all the time. It was a person
who lived their politics. I mean just it was. It
was all day, every day, and that that was never
gonna work.
Speaker 5 (10:48):
I don't this woman, the cop didn't wouldn't go to
coffee with you?
Speaker 1 (10:52):
Women are no a girlfriend? Oh okay, okay, very good
relationship other than other than that.
Speaker 3 (10:57):
Jack, what kind of photos are you putting up? If
you don't mind me asking.
Speaker 1 (11:01):
I'm glad this came up. I was gonna get to
this at some point. Yeah, I cause I got friends
I've talked to about this. Well, I've already had three
experiences where I met somebody at coffee shop. So we've
gotten through the chatting and stuff. You chat on the thing,
and then the next move usually is do you want
to take this to our phones to text because it's easier,
(11:23):
and if you're comfortable enough, you do that. And then
and then sometimes FaceTime or not, or some people like
want to meet for coffee right away, blah blah blah.
I have met three people, so we've gone through the
preliminaries enough that I'm interested enough. They're interested enough three
people that if they hadn't told me who they were,
I wouldn't have known it was them based on the
(11:43):
pictures they submitted that far off of their photos. Damn,
what filters? The fuck is that?
Speaker 3 (11:51):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (11:52):
That's bad.
Speaker 1 (11:53):
What the hell is that?
Speaker 2 (11:55):
You gotta get them in the showroom to make this sale.
So if it takes a little trigger get you into
the showroom.
Speaker 1 (12:01):
That's crazy.
Speaker 5 (12:03):
Did you FaceTime with any of them before you.
Speaker 1 (12:05):
Met up one of them? I had, And I thought,
what kind of weird video filter did you have? That
slimmed you by sixty five pounds?
Speaker 5 (12:15):
The filters are getting so good.
Speaker 1 (12:17):
Yeah, that's that's the thing. It's not just it's not
just like the free filter you use on your phone
or to do whatever. No, these things are fairly sophisticated,
I guess, And.
Speaker 4 (12:27):
They're being advertised on all social media platforms too, Like
if you go on Instagram and you're scrolling, there will
be an ad that'll say, oh, you can make your
photos look better here, and it's like a matter of seconds.
Speaker 1 (12:37):
See Joe's thing? Will you get him in the door
to make the sale? That makes sense to me, Like
if you're putting your picture up as a real estate agent,
you want to look caught to get more people.
Speaker 2 (12:46):
To call you to sell real estate agents. I don't
give a crap with you.
Speaker 1 (12:49):
I don't even like.
Speaker 2 (12:50):
We're not having sex. I don't think you're just gonna
handle a paperwork of a transaction. What do you gotta
be hot?
Speaker 1 (12:57):
But if that gets you a call and then you
sell them the house, fine, But if you're dating, I mean,
what you look like is a relatively commonly you know,
a high level bar of something. But to me, it's
more like you just committed fraud at a very high level.
(13:18):
What else are you willing to lie about?
Speaker 2 (13:20):
Well?
Speaker 5 (13:21):
And I think about that, I mean, I mean, and.
Speaker 1 (13:23):
I can easily check. How about the ones I can't check,
Like whether or not you got a murder in your background,
or you know, robbed your last husband, or abuse your
kids or whatever. The hell, I'm sorry, did.
Speaker 2 (13:33):
You say a murder? Just one? No, anyway, kitty, you
were trying to say something.
Speaker 4 (13:41):
Well, no, I just think about, like, how are those
people not mortified or embarrassed?
Speaker 5 (13:47):
Like I look nothing.
Speaker 1 (13:48):
They're not pictures, they're not And so I've had this
conversation with a whole bunch of people, like a bunch
of people, probably twenty people at this point who've had
the same experience, and all of us but one have
kept our mouth shut just out of a not wanting
to get into confrontation or whatever. You just kind of
keep the coffee meat short and say, hey, you know,
(14:11):
talk to you later, and then you just don't.
Speaker 2 (14:13):
That's such a waste of time there for the old
ghost Aerini's off the back door.
Speaker 1 (14:19):
Obviously, you'd be on very solid ground to say, look,
you and I both know you don't look anything like you.
I guess because it's so hurtful.
Speaker 5 (14:27):
Oh, I could so see you doing that. Hey, so
listen before we get started. You look nothing like your photo.
Speaker 1 (14:33):
Right. One woman told me that she held her phone
up and said to this dude, who is like a
foot shorter than he claimed, I'm looking for this guy
have you seen him held the photo that he had sent,
which is a pretty good line. Yeah, yeah, I'm supposed to.
I was at this coffee shop. I'm supposed to meet
this person here. Do you know them?
Speaker 5 (14:52):
I love that.
Speaker 2 (14:53):
Yeah, it is.
Speaker 1 (14:55):
I guess it's out of sadness. It's like a you're
so uncomfortable with the you look, you feel like you
need to alter your image. I mean, I'm not talking
about minor tweaks, like you're you look like a completely
different person. One of them was just age. You're sixty
(15:16):
and your pictures you're forty. I mean, you just lied
by twenty years of what you look like. You know
that it's his own thing. But then some of the
slimming stuff, I don't know how that works.
Speaker 4 (15:27):
Yeah, there's a lot of apps that you can do
that type of stuff with and it's uncomfortable.
Speaker 1 (15:32):
And it's pretty good, but again good. So you think
you're gonna show up looking completely different? Okay, Joe's on
his camera and now has changed himself into a pig,
and I'm supposed to just not mention. I'm just supposed
to notice that you're a pig. You're baby route.
Speaker 3 (15:49):
Yeah, just keep quiet.
Speaker 1 (15:51):
I should just keep that to myself and say I
enjoyed talking to you about politics. That callowing me a pig.
Speaker 2 (15:56):
You're calling me a pig, I could use it to
lose a couple of pounce. Calling me a pig.
Speaker 1 (16:01):
Is just hurtful, I don't know, but not cool man.
So the big is shaking its head just in case
anybody is thinking about doing this. This is what I've
learned and talking to lots of people. For women, it's
uh weight mostly. For men, it's height and age men,
(16:21):
it's height and age. For women, it's weight mostly, I
guess is the way the way you do it, you
shade your things, so you know, I don't even know
what to think about that. I don't know what to
do about that. It's very discouraging, though you could very
quickly get to a point of because it's it's like,
as many people point out, it's like having a part
time job. It's so time consuming. It's so freaking time
(16:43):
consuming because you get you know, you get whatever, two
to five people a day they have to start a
conversation with, and then women usually do a background check,
so if you get further enough along, you find out
the real name, and then you do a background check
to make sure they're not a sterial killer. It's and
it's a lot of work, and then you a lot
of work. And then if you're a busy ish person
I'm a full time single dad with a kid, carving
(17:06):
out time to go do anything is very, very difficult.
I'm tending to match with people in similar situations, and
you carve out the time to meet somebody you know,
you know completely lied about who you are, So thanks
for wasting hours and hours and hours of time. And
it's it's pretty discouraging it. I realize it works for people,
(17:26):
but not.
Speaker 5 (17:27):
As well as he used to.
Speaker 1 (17:28):
Everybody that's been on for a while says it's way
worse than it used to be. Whatever they did to
the algorithms when match dot Com bought all the different companies,
it's just, you know, like Joe said, all of the
incentives are against what they claim they're trying to do.
Speaker 3 (17:42):
This is why people are going to chatbots, have a
conversations with chatbots, right and and the classic mail order bride.
Speaker 2 (17:51):
And then sign nice gal from a different culture is
looking for a new start in America.
Speaker 1 (17:56):
There you go, Jack, I did. I did one of
those for a long time. The woman that was clearly phony.
I mean her pictures were way too not just that
she was attractive, but they were professional model shots, obviously,
and she lived in Miami and was interested in me
and everything like okay. So I played that along for
a while, just trying to figure out what the scam was.
(18:16):
But man, it went long way. I talked to her
on the phone, and she was from a foreign land,
and she kept going. She kept sending me videos though,
and I think I was supposed to click on them
and then end up installing malware on my computer. I
never clicked on any of these.
Speaker 2 (18:30):
They're probably just torn dog videos.
Speaker 1 (18:32):
I don't clearly it was a scam. Clearly it was
a scam. But to your picture, and then I'll shut
up about it, Michael, What my pictures like? What those
of us who are sane are doing. We want to
look exactly like our photos. The last thing in the
world I would want to do is to walk into
a coffee shop and have somebody go ooh, geez, no thanks, you.
Speaker 5 (18:55):
Should post on with your mustache.
Speaker 1 (18:57):
No, if you're not interested in what I really look like,
I'm showing the mustache.
Speaker 2 (19:04):
Yeah, yeah, I hear you talking. That's oh, why why
set yourself up for that sort of you know, embarrassment.
I'm gonna try filters. I'm gonna try makeup.
Speaker 1 (19:14):
I'm gonna wear makeup, and it's point just a waste
of time. Yeap, that did smooth you out. That's the filter.
Speaker 2 (19:22):
That's the filters colors, not as a number of profiles,
as hope, number of profiles like mine, say, zero filter.
Speaker 1 (19:30):
I am actually this age. All these pictures are in
the last year. That's what a lot of profiles. Of course,
some of them are a lie. They have that smoothed
out filter that just smooths out your skin way too much.
You've probably seen those, Katie. It's very those are cheap filters. Blur.
It's yeah, it just blurs out your face so much.
And that's immediately a path. Why you burn out your
face so much? I don't know. It's weird.
Speaker 2 (19:50):
God, the one I just used it makes me really
look like a weak effort at being transgender.
Speaker 1 (19:56):
Oh.
Speaker 2 (19:56):
One other thing that I'll mention the nice Katie's got
a pandaff handle rain on a cloud above her head,
tossing down red hearts.
Speaker 1 (20:05):
Jack, I think you need action shots.
Speaker 3 (20:07):
One of you writing one of you, like pointing one
of you.
Speaker 1 (20:11):
Like Tom Cruise. Yeah, taking my jacket off like a girl. Yeah.
The other thing. I'll talk about this another time because
this is going pretty long. But you have to get
used to the ghosting. It's just the culture is weird.
The culture is where you'll be talking with somebody over
several days, seems like it's going well, and then people
just stop responding. And like the first time I wanted
(20:33):
to stop responding somebody, I sent him a text and said, hey,
I already had somebody else that got to me first,
So we're gonna go out for coffee. If that doesn't
work out, I'll get back to it. And they said,
you realize nobody does this right. Lets you know that
they met somebody else and they'll get back to you.
That's not the way this works. That's what they actually
told me.
Speaker 2 (20:51):
Actually kind of criticized you for being polite.
Speaker 1 (20:56):
You don't handle it like normal society. And I have sense,
you know, when in Rome joined in, it's just like
you go along and with the endless possibilities, you decide
another one and you just ghost the five people you've
been having conversations. Oh, it's horrible.
Speaker 2 (21:08):
It's terrible.
Speaker 1 (21:09):
It's demoralizing, but that's what everybody does, and it's not
good for society. I guarantee you this is making society
worse and more jaded and will lead to fewer long
lasting relationships.
Speaker 2 (21:22):
That's unplug the internet. Yeah, on, Katie, you're not a blowfish.
Speaker 5 (21:28):
Feel like Alish identify.
Speaker 2 (21:31):
Exactly you identify as a blowfish. But you're uninflated.
Speaker 1 (21:35):
You I don't know how to I don't know how
to blow up. So as soon as soon as we
get off the air, I will take my six foot
eight frame with long mane of blonde hair back to
Bubble and see how I do.
Speaker 3 (21:45):
Wish you well, okay, Jack, here's what you do. You
go on dates with a fake beard. You get to
the dinner table. If she looks like her picture, you
rip the beard off and you go on the date. Otherwise,
you just walk past her and go out the door.
Speaker 2 (21:58):
With a fake beard on it perfect goldberry.
Speaker 5 (22:01):
Well, I guess that's it.
I choose the topic, then it's ask me anything, one
more thing. I'm one more thing. I was trying to
decide how to present this information. I'm hesitant to do it.
I have a feeling I'm gonna wish I hadn't. Uh.
Speaker 2 (00:19):
Oh boy.
Speaker 1 (00:20):
I've always been quite willing to share lots about my
personal life on the air, for better or worse. I
have trouble not talking about things more than the other
way around. I get that, but I will. I will
share this all. Just I'm gonna lay out the topic
and then I think ask me anything would be the
(00:41):
best way to approach it. You guys can just interview
me on the.
Speaker 2 (00:44):
Topic, Okay, right, which does not it's not called I
will answer anything.
Speaker 1 (00:49):
No, that's plenty out. Yeah, yeah, fair enough. Two months
ago I entered the war. I'm embarrassed about this, by
the way. Oh boy, I'm embarrassed of this. I feel
bad about myself, but it's true. Anyway. Two months ago,
I entered the world of online dating.
Speaker 2 (01:09):
Okay, okay, by that I embarrassed by that, Yes I am,
because I had been saying for many, many years, we're
older than you, Katie.
Speaker 1 (01:18):
You have grown up in a world where this is common.
I used to we used to regularly say on the air,
it's r O D at reeks of desperation, people who
are online dating times of change, times of change. Then
the numbers become the numbers have become overwhelming, and it's
just practically what everybody does. And uh, and I had,
(01:41):
as a single guy, realized, at some point, I go
to work, and then I go straight home and take
care of kids, and then I get up and go
to work again. And unless I end up in a
car crash with somebody roughly my age, it's also single
and I didn't cause the car, so they're not angry
at me. It's hard to imagine how I'm going to
(02:03):
run into anybody. I got chocolate in my peanut butter. Yeah,
it almost has to be one of those.
Speaker 3 (02:07):
Yeah, to do very slow fender benders, like five miles
an hour, just enough so none of the cars are damage.
Speaker 4 (02:13):
To you just have to start seeing cute girls and
crashing into us.
Speaker 2 (02:18):
Oh, we probably ought to see if there's a little damage.
I'm so sorry. I'm a man who's willing to say
he's sorry when he's wrong. Hi, my name's Jack.
Speaker 1 (02:24):
That's not a bad idea, I buy like a two
thousand and eight Corolla. No, I don't care if it
gets a few dents later a minute major dents, yeah,
grocery store sort of. Just oh dang, I wasn't looking,
but you're driving.
Speaker 2 (02:38):
A seventeen year old Corona.
Speaker 1 (02:40):
That would make me less appealing, wouldn't it is. I'm
still surprised that so many young people are doing online dating,
because I would think you'd still have the social structure.
You're going out a lot, and you know, with lots
of other people who singing, so you can still run
into people the normal Wait, no, no, they.
Speaker 5 (02:58):
Lack the social skills.
Speaker 4 (03:00):
I know so many young twenty somethings that are on
like five different apps.
Speaker 5 (03:05):
It's amazing to me.
Speaker 2 (03:06):
Well, I haven't done whether just a hookup or they
just they don't have the social skills to try to
get acquainted with somebody they don't know.
Speaker 1 (03:15):
Yeah, I'm on one app. Bumble. I chose that after
a little bit of research. They're almost all all except
for two, are owned by the same company. Now match
dot Com went up out and bought all of the
names you've heard of of online dating, and they're all
owned by one company. Now, and there is a great
belief among people that have been doing it for years.
(03:36):
I've been doing it for eight weeks, but for people
who have been doing it for years that it's much
worse than it used to be. That the algorithms are
designed to keep you on there because you pay a
whatever it is, sixty dollars a month, and then you
pay per like liking somebody or whatever you buy likes. Anyway,
it's a great revenue stream, and there'd be great incentive
for the company to try to keep that going rather
(03:57):
than hey, we found it are we know who you
would like and they knew, we put you together, and
then you leave the app and we never make another
set from you, or we can dribble along people that
kind of might be interesting to you.
Speaker 2 (04:10):
Yeah. Please that the incentive structure.
Speaker 1 (04:13):
Is pretty easy to rit. Yes it is, Yes, for
what it's worth.
Speaker 2 (04:17):
On the recent season of Only Murders in the Building,
the Steve Martin character is on various dating apps for
older folks, and I can't remember all the names of them,
but one of them is last gasp dot com.
Speaker 1 (04:31):
That's funny. So anybody get any questions about this, I
am you. How's it going, Okay, how's it going.
Speaker 2 (04:40):
So, do you have a very broad a detailed profile
up there?
Speaker 1 (04:43):
I do have a detailed profile. I am doing incognito mode.
I don't know if it's necessary or not. I remember
one of the things that sparked in my head, the
idea that maybe somebody I would be doing this when
I was single is I heard Chris Rock talking about it.
He said people were amazing to find me on I
forget what he was on, hinge ormatch dot com or
(05:04):
something like that, and he said with my name. He said,
I'm on there with my name because that's my name.
I'm single and I'm looking for someone to date and
that's my name. So that's kind of what I did.
But I have I do have a profile on there.
I'm doing incognito mode, which is you're not out in
the world for everybody to see you. I didn't want
to do that.
Speaker 5 (05:23):
It's like only your matches can see you.
Speaker 1 (05:25):
Only people I see and then like yeah, I think
I'm interested, and then they get back. It's been both
good and bad that so few people are aware of
the Armstrong and Getty Show in general. I mean, I've
had a handful of I know who you are and
are all excited about that, But an awful lot of
(05:49):
and mostly the reason that the majority of the reason
people don't know because at some point, very quickly, you
get into what do you do for a living? I
mean that's a very common early question, right.
Speaker 3 (05:59):
Hum.
Speaker 1 (06:01):
It's people who just don't follow the news at all,
that is most of it. They wouldn't. It's not that
they like a different radio show, they don't listen to
talk radio, they don't follow news, they don't fall politics.
I've chatted with so many people that are completely checked
out of that world, and I think, wow, that's interesting
(06:21):
and refreshing in many ways.
Speaker 2 (06:22):
Yeah. I listened to Q one O three soft hits
of today and yesterday, Right, that sort of person.
Speaker 1 (06:28):
Yeah, And there are a ton of people, as we've
talked about on the air, who have absolutely no MAGA
or if you voted for Trump, swipe which is it
right or left? I should figure that out.
Speaker 2 (06:40):
This is you can keep ending up with truck drivers.
Speaker 4 (06:43):
Does your profile have anything about your political leaning on it?
Speaker 1 (06:46):
I have myself as a moderate, which is true and
certainly in terms of my ability to be in a
relationship with somebody I am unless you're unless you're like
adamant about certain things and won't even and have to
talk about it all the time. I don't really care
that much about your politics.
Speaker 2 (07:07):
Well, right, it's funny because I would be a a
what do you call it to if we don't go
to war like Muhammad Ali, a conscientious objector to the
very question. I am a moderate in terms of getting
together with a woman I hit it off with, and
we care about each other. I couldn't give a crap.
Let's run our lives and if we differ on this
(07:28):
other stuff, let's just not talk about it. And most
well I should in real life. Of course, I'm a
proud fascist, but.
Speaker 1 (07:36):
Around I know a lot of people that seem to
have that attitude. Although there was one woman like the
best connection in terms of chatting that I had early on.
We're going back and forth and like the same books
and have been to the same museums and all this
different starts stopping all that, and we even got far
as far as to like facetiming each other and having
real conversations in real life and everything like that. Wow,
this is over a couple of weeks. And then I
(07:58):
was going to drive to Meeter, we're gonna eat for coffee.
So this had had made it pretty far by these standards,
and she said, you know, I can't believe I haven't
even asked this yet. I should ask what your political
leanings are. And I thought, okay, oh boy, and I
said I'm a moderate lean right, And her response is, oh,
that's way too far from where I am. This is
never gonna work. Well. I enjoyed talking to you, too bad.
(08:20):
I mean it was that quickly over after weeks of discussing,
face timing, talking about our kids, I mean, just like
really got to know each other a lot. She finds
out I'm moderate leaning right, that's way too far from
where I am. Now you Matrix dodged that bullet, yeah,
which which makes her a nut job. But how how
nuts is that?
Speaker 2 (08:40):
She will never hear this? But you have maneuvered yourself
and your own mind into a terribly sad position.
Speaker 1 (08:47):
My dear, no feeling for you.
Speaker 2 (08:49):
I pity you, no kidding. Yeah, a lot of people have.
Speaker 1 (08:55):
And and how would you not get past the fact
that we've been talking for weeks about raising kids and
jobs and things we like to do, things that really matter,
things that really matter. In your life, and they all
clicked really really well. But on voting day once a year,
the fact that we disagree, we couldn't possibly even sit
(09:16):
down for cast. She wasn't even willing to have coffee
with me once she found out. I leaned right.
Speaker 2 (09:21):
And to put a finer point on it, you've gone
through all of the steps you go through to make
sure somebody's not abhorrent. Right, You've decided this person is
not abhorrent. Then it turns out they disagree with you
somewhat on politics, and you decide, yes, they're abhorrent. You
have put politics far too high in your list of
(09:42):
you know, how you define people.
Speaker 1 (09:43):
That one blew my mind.
Speaker 2 (09:45):
Yeah, and I think about politics in the greater sense
principle and ideas and that sort of thing more than
is healthy. And I think that's insane, where I am
just the opposite. If she had said she's a progressive,
which is, you know, an indication of pretty far left.
Having had the conversations we had, I would have thought, well,
(10:07):
that's fine. I mean, given everything we've just talked about
with raising kids and how we feel about marriage and
life and jobs and blah blah blah, that's because you're saying, yeah,
I thought that was damned interesting. All right, So I
ask you anything you have perhaps in the past run
into similar dynamics politically speak like a left lefty.
Speaker 1 (10:30):
Yeah, I did have a girlfriend who was a left
lefty for a while.
Speaker 2 (10:33):
Can you get past that these days? Even with your ID?
Speaker 1 (10:36):
Actually, this person was this particular person who was very
very nice, but also very adamant about the positions and
talked about it all the time. It was a person
who lived their politics. I mean just it was. It
was all day, every day, and that that was never
gonna work.
Speaker 5 (10:48):
I don't this woman, the cop didn't wouldn't go to
coffee with you?
Speaker 1 (10:52):
Women are no a girlfriend? Oh okay, okay, very good
relationship other than other than that.
Speaker 3 (10:57):
Jack, what kind of photos are you putting up? If
you don't mind me asking.
Speaker 1 (11:01):
I'm glad this came up. I was gonna get to
this at some point. Yeah, I cause I got friends
I've talked to about this. Well, I've already had three
experiences where I met somebody at coffee shop. So we've
gotten through the chatting and stuff. You chat on the thing,
and then the next move usually is do you want
to take this to our phones to text because it's easier,
(11:23):
and if you're comfortable enough, you do that. And then
and then sometimes FaceTime or not, or some people like
want to meet for coffee right away, blah blah blah.
I have met three people, so we've gone through the
preliminaries enough that I'm interested enough. They're interested enough three
people that if they hadn't told me who they were,
I wouldn't have known it was them based on the
(11:43):
pictures they submitted that far off of their photos. Damn,
what filters? The fuck is that?
Speaker 3 (11:51):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (11:52):
That's bad.
Speaker 1 (11:53):
What the hell is that?
Speaker 2 (11:55):
You gotta get them in the showroom to make this sale.
So if it takes a little trigger get you into
the showroom.
Speaker 1 (12:01):
That's crazy.
Speaker 5 (12:03):
Did you FaceTime with any of them before you.
Speaker 1 (12:05):
Met up one of them? I had, And I thought,
what kind of weird video filter did you have? That
slimmed you by sixty five pounds?
Speaker 5 (12:15):
The filters are getting so good.
Speaker 1 (12:17):
Yeah, that's that's the thing. It's not just it's not
just like the free filter you use on your phone
or to do whatever. No, these things are fairly sophisticated,
I guess, And.
Speaker 4 (12:27):
They're being advertised on all social media platforms too, Like
if you go on Instagram and you're scrolling, there will
be an ad that'll say, oh, you can make your
photos look better here, and it's like a matter of seconds.
Speaker 1 (12:37):
See Joe's thing? Will you get him in the door
to make the sale? That makes sense to me, Like
if you're putting your picture up as a real estate agent,
you want to look caught to get more people.
Speaker 2 (12:46):
To call you to sell real estate agents. I don't
give a crap with you.
Speaker 1 (12:49):
I don't even like.
Speaker 2 (12:50):
We're not having sex. I don't think you're just gonna
handle a paperwork of a transaction. What do you gotta
be hot?
Speaker 1 (12:57):
But if that gets you a call and then you
sell them the house, fine, But if you're dating, I mean,
what you look like is a relatively commonly you know,
a high level bar of something. But to me, it's
more like you just committed fraud at a very high level.
(13:18):
What else are you willing to lie about?
Speaker 2 (13:20):
Well?
Speaker 5 (13:21):
And I think about that, I mean, I mean, and.
Speaker 1 (13:23):
I can easily check. How about the ones I can't check,
Like whether or not you got a murder in your background,
or you know, robbed your last husband, or abuse your
kids or whatever. The hell, I'm sorry, did.
Speaker 2 (13:33):
You say a murder? Just one? No, anyway, kitty, you
were trying to say something.
Speaker 4 (13:41):
Well, no, I just think about, like, how are those
people not mortified or embarrassed?
Speaker 5 (13:47):
Like I look nothing.
Speaker 1 (13:48):
They're not pictures, they're not And so I've had this
conversation with a whole bunch of people, like a bunch
of people, probably twenty people at this point who've had
the same experience, and all of us but one have
kept our mouth shut just out of a not wanting
to get into confrontation or whatever. You just kind of
keep the coffee meat short and say, hey, you know,
(14:11):
talk to you later, and then you just don't.
Speaker 2 (14:13):
That's such a waste of time there for the old
ghost Aerini's off the back door.
Speaker 1 (14:19):
Obviously, you'd be on very solid ground to say, look,
you and I both know you don't look anything like you.
I guess because it's so hurtful.
Speaker 5 (14:27):
Oh, I could so see you doing that. Hey, so
listen before we get started. You look nothing like your photo.
Speaker 1 (14:33):
Right. One woman told me that she held her phone
up and said to this dude, who is like a
foot shorter than he claimed, I'm looking for this guy
have you seen him held the photo that he had sent,
which is a pretty good line. Yeah, yeah, I'm supposed to.
I was at this coffee shop. I'm supposed to meet
this person here. Do you know them?
Speaker 5 (14:52):
I love that.
Speaker 2 (14:53):
Yeah, it is.
Speaker 1 (14:55):
I guess it's out of sadness. It's like a you're
so uncomfortable with the you look, you feel like you
need to alter your image. I mean, I'm not talking
about minor tweaks, like you're you look like a completely
different person. One of them was just age. You're sixty
(15:16):
and your pictures you're forty. I mean, you just lied
by twenty years of what you look like. You know
that it's his own thing. But then some of the
slimming stuff, I don't know how that works.
Speaker 4 (15:27):
Yeah, there's a lot of apps that you can do
that type of stuff with and it's uncomfortable.
Speaker 1 (15:32):
And it's pretty good, but again good. So you think
you're gonna show up looking completely different? Okay, Joe's on
his camera and now has changed himself into a pig,
and I'm supposed to just not mention. I'm just supposed
to notice that you're a pig. You're baby route.
Speaker 3 (15:49):
Yeah, just keep quiet.
Speaker 1 (15:51):
I should just keep that to myself and say I
enjoyed talking to you about politics. That callowing me a pig.
Speaker 2 (15:56):
You're calling me a pig, I could use it to
lose a couple of pounce. Calling me a pig.
Speaker 1 (16:01):
Is just hurtful, I don't know, but not cool man.
So the big is shaking its head just in case
anybody is thinking about doing this. This is what I've
learned and talking to lots of people. For women, it's
uh weight mostly. For men, it's height and age men,
(16:21):
it's height and age. For women, it's weight mostly, I
guess is the way the way you do it, you
shade your things, so you know, I don't even know
what to think about that. I don't know what to
do about that. It's very discouraging, though you could very
quickly get to a point of because it's it's like,
as many people point out, it's like having a part
time job. It's so time consuming. It's so freaking time
(16:43):
consuming because you get you know, you get whatever, two
to five people a day they have to start a
conversation with, and then women usually do a background check,
so if you get further enough along, you find out
the real name, and then you do a background check
to make sure they're not a sterial killer. It's and
it's a lot of work, and then you a lot
of work. And then if you're a busy ish person
I'm a full time single dad with a kid, carving
(17:06):
out time to go do anything is very, very difficult.
I'm tending to match with people in similar situations, and
you carve out the time to meet somebody you know,
you know completely lied about who you are, So thanks
for wasting hours and hours and hours of time. And
it's it's pretty discouraging it. I realize it works for people,
(17:26):
but not.
Speaker 5 (17:27):
As well as he used to.
Speaker 1 (17:28):
Everybody that's been on for a while says it's way
worse than it used to be. Whatever they did to
the algorithms when match dot Com bought all the different companies,
it's just, you know, like Joe said, all of the
incentives are against what they claim they're trying to do.
Speaker 3 (17:42):
This is why people are going to chatbots, have a
conversations with chatbots, right and and the classic mail order bride.
Speaker 2 (17:51):
And then sign nice gal from a different culture is
looking for a new start in America.
Speaker 1 (17:56):
There you go, Jack, I did. I did one of
those for a long time. The woman that was clearly phony.
I mean her pictures were way too not just that
she was attractive, but they were professional model shots, obviously,
and she lived in Miami and was interested in me
and everything like okay. So I played that along for
a while, just trying to figure out what the scam was.
(18:16):
But man, it went long way. I talked to her
on the phone, and she was from a foreign land,
and she kept going. She kept sending me videos though,
and I think I was supposed to click on them
and then end up installing malware on my computer. I
never clicked on any of these.
Speaker 2 (18:30):
They're probably just torn dog videos.
Speaker 1 (18:32):
I don't clearly it was a scam. Clearly it was
a scam. But to your picture, and then I'll shut
up about it, Michael, What my pictures like? What those
of us who are sane are doing. We want to
look exactly like our photos. The last thing in the
world I would want to do is to walk into
a coffee shop and have somebody go ooh, geez, no thanks, you.
Speaker 5 (18:55):
Should post on with your mustache.
Speaker 1 (18:57):
No, if you're not interested in what I really look like,
I'm showing the mustache.
Speaker 2 (19:04):
Yeah, yeah, I hear you talking. That's oh, why why
set yourself up for that sort of you know, embarrassment.
I'm gonna try filters. I'm gonna try makeup.
Speaker 1 (19:14):
I'm gonna wear makeup, and it's point just a waste
of time. Yeap, that did smooth you out. That's the filter.
Speaker 2 (19:22):
That's the filters colors, not as a number of profiles,
as hope, number of profiles like mine, say, zero filter.
Speaker 1 (19:30):
I am actually this age. All these pictures are in
the last year. That's what a lot of profiles. Of course,
some of them are a lie. They have that smoothed
out filter that just smooths out your skin way too much.
You've probably seen those, Katie. It's very those are cheap filters. Blur.
It's yeah, it just blurs out your face so much.
And that's immediately a path. Why you burn out your
face so much? I don't know. It's weird.
Speaker 2 (19:50):
God, the one I just used it makes me really
look like a weak effort at being transgender.
Speaker 1 (19:56):
Oh.
Speaker 2 (19:56):
One other thing that I'll mention the nice Katie's got
a pandaff handle rain on a cloud above her head,
tossing down red hearts.
Speaker 1 (20:05):
Jack, I think you need action shots.
Speaker 3 (20:07):
One of you writing one of you, like pointing one
of you.
Speaker 1 (20:11):
Like Tom Cruise. Yeah, taking my jacket off like a girl. Yeah.
The other thing. I'll talk about this another time because
this is going pretty long. But you have to get
used to the ghosting. It's just the culture is weird.
The culture is where you'll be talking with somebody over
several days, seems like it's going well, and then people
just stop responding. And like the first time I wanted
(20:33):
to stop responding somebody, I sent him a text and said, hey,
I already had somebody else that got to me first,
So we're gonna go out for coffee. If that doesn't
work out, I'll get back to it. And they said,
you realize nobody does this right. Lets you know that
they met somebody else and they'll get back to you.
That's not the way this works. That's what they actually
told me.
Speaker 2 (20:51):
Actually kind of criticized you for being polite.
Speaker 1 (20:56):
You don't handle it like normal society. And I have sense,
you know, when in Rome joined in, it's just like
you go along and with the endless possibilities, you decide
another one and you just ghost the five people you've
been having conversations. Oh, it's horrible.
Speaker 2 (21:08):
It's terrible.
Speaker 1 (21:09):
It's demoralizing, but that's what everybody does, and it's not
good for society. I guarantee you this is making society
worse and more jaded and will lead to fewer long
lasting relationships.
Speaker 2 (21:22):
That's unplug the internet. Yeah, on, Katie, you're not a blowfish.
Speaker 5 (21:28):
Feel like Alish identify.
Speaker 2 (21:31):
Exactly you identify as a blowfish. But you're uninflated.
Speaker 1 (21:35):
You I don't know how to I don't know how
to blow up. So as soon as soon as we
get off the air, I will take my six foot
eight frame with long mane of blonde hair back to
Bubble and see how I do.
Speaker 3 (21:45):
Wish you well, okay, Jack, here's what you do. You
go on dates with a fake beard. You get to
the dinner table. If she looks like her picture, you
rip the beard off and you go on the date. Otherwise,
you just walk past her and go out the door.
Speaker 2 (21:58):
With a fake beard on it perfect goldberry.
Speaker 5 (22:01):
Well, I guess that's it.
Hosts And Creators
Joe Getty
Jack Armstrong
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