July 8, 2024 • 31 mins
Man runs through LAX tarmac shirtless / Wheel falls off airplane / Tim doesn’t like whistleblowers // Hawaiian airlines plane loses roof / jake johansen airplane joke // Celebrity E-Vite from Kennedy on the 4th stayed for 10 minutes // 626 Festival at Santa Anita
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Episode Transcript
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(00:00):
It's KFI AM six forty and you'relistening to the Conway Show on demand on
the iHeartRadio app. We've got acrazy I should call him that. Maybe
it's going through A. I don'tknow, some kind of episode at LAX.
But at LAX it's one of thefew places where they demand one hundred
(00:22):
percent order on the runways, thetarmac, the anywhere outside, anywhere past
TSA, even before TSA. Airportsin America demand one hundred percent order.
They want order from the time youpark your car until you get to your
(00:44):
destination. But as long as you'rein the airport system, you're going to
the airport, you're going through TSA, you get on your flight, you
take your flight, you get offyour flight, you go run to car,
and you're done. From airport toairport, they want one hundred percent
order order. They don't want anyonescreaming, they don't want anyone fighting,
(01:04):
They don't want anyone drinking too muchand getting belligerent. If so, you're
gonna lose your flying privileges, andmaybe you should. Maybe you can't fly
with us because you can't behave that'spossible as well. More people should be
on that list. But at LAX, guy walking around the tarmac with his
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shirt off, running away from cops. Not order, not order. They
want order and they weren't getting fromthis lad. What's going on with this
guy? Check out this wild videofrom LAX yesterday at cat Oh, that's
great. Even the newscaster it's awild video. It's like, you know,
newscasters see everything, and she's like, how about this wild video?
(01:45):
Check out this wild video from LAXyesterday. A passenger became a right and
ran onto the tarmac Terminal four Airport. Police said the shirt list barefoot man.
Wow, was experience casual. Casualguy on the tarmac, no shirt,
no shoes, Uh, no flight, it's over Polisa. The shirtless
barefoot man was experiencing some type ofmental health crisis. The department is reviewing
(02:08):
the video, which appears to showan officer firing a taser at the man.
Eventually, he was tackled. Policearrested him for battery against an officer.
He was taken to the hospital formental health evaluation. Yeah, I'd
give that guy a break. He'sgoing through something. Health evaluation. Yeah,
he needs a health evaluation. Sothat was kind of a crazy thing.
(02:30):
To see, and then Bellio istelling me the video I was watching
during the break is not old video. I thought that happened in March where
a plane lost its tire. Butyou're saying that that might be another one,
Bellio, it was another one.Wait a minute, there's another plane
that lost another tire. This morning, an entire wheel dropped off a plane
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again. Yeah. A United confirmedin a statement that a wheel fell off
the jet as flight one thousand andone departed Lax International around seven am on
its way to Denver. If youwere running, was it bowing? Don't
please don't tell me it's a Boweing, Please please, please, christ I
ton't not tell me that because I'mflying on a Boeing next week and it's
(03:17):
a Boeing seven thirty seven Max.This was a seven fifty seven two hundred
Okay, all right, Well,but wouldn't you think, Pallie, if
you ran Boeing and I think you'ddo a good job or United and the
first tire fell off, wouldn't youround up all the mechanics and go,
guys, check the bolts. Yeah, you got it. Put we got
(03:38):
to tighten those bolts on these uhon these on these tires, because man,
are they important. When we land, I would say, this will
not happen again, yeah, andslam your fist down. Yeah, and
then some of your mascara comes off. You're like, wow, they get
dust cloud in here, bunch ofthe crap you're wearing. Yeah. So
I I don't know what happened,and I don't know what's going on.
(04:02):
But there were two whistle blowers forBoeing and they both got died. They
got died. Is that what happened? They died. Both of them won
by suicide and the other one.We're not sure. But Boeing doesn't mess
around with whistleblowers. They'll just putyou down. Yeah. I don't like
(04:25):
that. So, yeah, theylike their planes, they don't like whistleblowers.
They'll put you they'll put their whistleblowersdown like that. That's right.
Yeah, Although you know what,if we had whistleblowers around here, I'd
look down on those guys too.Like whistleblowers. I don't know. It's
a tattletale. I it doesn't matterif it's Republican, Democrat, big business,
(04:46):
small business. I hate whistleblowers.I hate that term, and I
hate the uh the attitude. Yeah, snitches get stitches right, Yeah,
I don't like whistleblowers. And thenpeople, you know, text me,
oh, well, this chemical isgiving people cancer. And you know,
if you powdered your bowls or Iunderstand that, I get it right,
(05:09):
that some chemicals might not be goodfor you. And there might be a
good or two, you know,one or two whistleblowers that you know are
cool. But I don't like theterm. I don't know, it's it's
weird. I don't like whistle blower. I don't like that term. But
it looks like we have another tirethat has fallen off yet another airplane.
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And these aren't tires like on yourcar. These are tires that probably weigh
four or five hundred pounds each,and they're very solid, and when they
start rolling, you know, theairplane's doing about a buck eighty when it
takes off, so after, youknow, shortly after takeoff, that tire
was probably doing two hundred miles anhour as it's rolling down the runway and
slamming into god only knows what.But man, oh man, we got
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to get air travel. We gotto get that together. A lot of
people are doing it. This summer, and people don't want their airplanes falling
apart. They'll see more and morewith the warming up of everything, that's
causing so much more turbulence on planesin general. It's like air travel is
just gonna get worse. Apparently,it's gonna it's gonna get crazy, you
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know. I mean, they're eventuallythey're gonna have to like fly over the
ocean if you're going to go toyou know, from Phoenix to Seattle.
They're gonna have to come to Lafly over the ocean to Seattle to just
to avoid the turbulence because the turbulenceover these hot states over Nevada is wild.
Man. Would you fly to Vegasin the summer, that's a that's
a forty five minute carnival ride.Like last week, the guy ended up
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in the carry on luggage of crackup top. I'm bowing and settled down,
and all they see your feet hangingdown. That's okay. I'd love
to have seen that, right.You know, guy ignores the seatbelt sign.
It's for cowards. I think everybody'salways like, wait a minute,
isn't the ceiling that we see isthat the other side of that air I
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guess not gets launched into the ceiling. It's horrible, it's so terrible.
But he's on the way to,you know, see his daughter get married.
Don't want to go anyway. Youknow, it's painting the ash he
moved out. It's got to goto Boston to see her get married.
It's gonna be expensive, it's gonnabe gifts. You got to give a
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speech that you don't really believe in, to say the whole deal, and
then bang you get out a flightand it launches you into the ceiling.
Literally. But I guarantee you thoughthat after people see that, a lot
more people are wearing their seatbelts theentire flight. You hear it, and
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there's no more, you know,there's no more waiting at the bathroom in
the back like I'll hold it.I'll wait till I get home and use
the debate, do they When theplane settles down and everybody sees the legs,
then you just hear click throughout theplane. Right. What's his name?
There's a comedian, there's a veryfunny comedian who said, I can't
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remember his name, but the planethat went from Honolulu to Maui and the
roof blew off, and you know, so they're flying without the roof of
the plane, and a very funnycomedian said, I would reach for the
stewardess button, which is not thereanymore, and then I'd flagger down and
go, excuse me, ma'am,everybody in this road needs another drink.
(08:35):
Oh that's funny stuff. I can'tremember the comic that said that. I'll
find out during the break as Igot to give the guy credit. Very
funny man. You're listening to TimConway Junior on demand from kf I AM
six forty. I found the comedianthat said that did a bit about the
roof flying off the plane. Iremember what year that happened. I think
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it was in the seventies or eighties, but I do remember watching that.
It was a plane that left Ithink it was Loha Airlines Aloha, but
it left Honolulu and it was goingto Maui, and about halfway through that
what is it twenty five minute flightmax, the roof came off the plane.
So the people sitting in first classwere looking at the sky and there
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was no roof. There was noluggage rag, there was no swortus button,
no little air conditioner, no lightsnothinge eight by the way, eighty
eight Wow, okay, what abig year. Eighty eight Dodgers win the
World Series, Lakers win the Championship, and this plane malfunctions. So his
name is Jake Johansen. I've notseen him around lately, but truly one
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of the funniest comedians in the world. I love this guy. Whatever this
guy was playing locally here, Iwould always get up and take a shave
and go see him at a comedystore or I don't know, one of
those comedy clubs. He was great, and I don't know what happened.
I don't know if he's still aroundor if he's still doing comedy or what.
(10:01):
But a very original guy, originalthought. So I think this is
the bit here. Let me playit for you and see if you agree.
Their disasters, because I now crashing, I'm not so scared of that
anymore. I feel safe about that. The one that scares me is the
top coming off, because how doyou emotionally get ready for? What are
(10:26):
you thinking when that top peoples?You know, my drink or worse,
you're sitting next to the guy whogets sucked out of you. Yeah,
I think I would have to callthe flight attendant. I know they're busy,
but somebody get sucked out. Ifeel like they should know I punched
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a button. I'd be kind ofhard to break that to him once they
got to your seat, you know. Oh hi, Yeah, I called.
He's gone. We need more drinks. That's great. The very funny
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guy occuring out the Comedy Store andalso on another network. He's doing another
show on another network, Ladies andGentlemen, Jake Johansson. Very nice to
see you, very nice to seeyou, but very very original guy Belly,
Can you find out where he is? You're always good at tracking people
down. You got it all right, thank you. Big commotion still at
(11:35):
the homeowner Gil Leaves on Channel fiveis high over this shooting in Valley Village,
North Hollywood, where three chaps decidedto break into a home another guy.
A guy was home when it happened, and then they shot and shot
(11:56):
one of the guys. The othertwo guys got away. But it's on
Magnolia and Coal Fax. It's onchannel five right now. Can we pull
that up, Stefrere you go.Homeowner shoots suspect the intruder. It's a
big deal. A lot of streetsare closed there on Coalfact Helicopter Magnolia.
(12:18):
I'm clear if there's an additional suspectthat may have been with that mail that
was shot, there is definitely asearch underway. But again, one person
shot here in the eleven thousand,six hundred block of Addison Street this afternoon.
That's the latest overhead up at Skyfive. I'll send it back to
you in the studio. There yougo, Addison, coal Fax, Magnolia.
A lot of big homes there.A lot of people decided that they
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want property instead of just a housethat is a mansion right next to another
house. You know, in OrangeCounty you get a lot of them where
you know you will own a fivethousand square foot home and if you reach
out the window, you can touchthe neighbor's window. And a lot of
wealthy people don't like that, sothey buy homes on Magnolia where you can
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get a half acre or acre twoacres and pretend you're rich, pretend,
pretend richie in the valley, becausethat equivalent home in Orange County is three
feet from your neighbor. But inthe valley you got a half acre,
three quarters of an acre. Youcan stretch out and enjoy yourself. That's
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why people live there. Ding dong. All right, I don't want to
steal this from Petro some money,but real quick. People have been asking
what we did on July fourth.Krozier, Let's begin with you. What
did you do on July fourth tocelebrate our independence? Uh? Well,
after I left here, went backhome and Jen's daughter had a party with
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a bunch of friends out in thebackyard. But by the time I got
there, Jen had started up thejacuza. Oh no, please don't tell
me you did that again. Wedid the jacuzzi with the fireworks right from
the water. So you when yourdaughters were Jen's daughter's friends were all over,
you made them leave so you canget into jacuzzi nude. No,
we just told him we were goingto do that. They were free to
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leave or stay. Or did yousuit up to get in? Sure?
Yeah? And then off comes thesuit, you know, and all of
a sudden wandering feet the day offreedom. Tim All right, freedom,
Stephan, you worked right, Isure did. Yeah. It sucks,
elliot. What did you do?Family? Like barbecue and pool and jacuzzi?
(14:30):
Wow? It was fabulous. Ohthat was kind of cool. Would
you do? Elmer? What'd youdo for July fourth? Anything interesting?
Oh? No, I was editingall day long, but I finished the
second cut of the short film,so wow. Productive. Looking for a
duvet cover? Angel? What didyou do on July fourth to celebrate our
independence? I reported on traffic.It was awesome to what time? Oh
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until seven, to the end ofyour show. But then after that,
you know, I've got a dogand she gets really scared during the fireworks
that are going off everywhere, soI stayed at home just to keep her
calm, and I saw some fireworksand stuff from home. So it was
a lot of fun. That's cool, Yeah, very very cool. All
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right, I guess it's me.I guess my turn, right, everybody
else has spoken, Oh yeah,what would you do? I was invited
to a celebrities house who listens tothe show in Pacific Palisades and we come
back. I'll tell you who thatwas. But it was a big celebrity
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who invited me to their house,her house, and I went. I
usually don't go, Yeah, Idon't let you go. I'd like to
drive on July fourth because people aredrinking and crazy, but I went because
I really liked this person and Ithought she I think she's great. So
I'll tell you who that is.We'll come back. You're listening to Tim
(16:04):
Conway Junior on demand from KFI AMsix forty. Hey, I got an
invite from my celebrity. I neverget invites from celebrities, but on July
fourth, I got an invite,like two weeks before. It was an
evite. I like evites, easyto say no, easy to just say
uh no. E Z. TheE stands for e Z to say no.
(16:29):
And it was for a lovely womanwho I've known for years, who
used to host this well not thisslot, but the evening slot. It
was Kennedy from Fox News, andshe invited me to her party. My
wife couldn't go because she was committedto another event, so I left here
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on July fourth, went straight toDel Taco. Wasn't really quite sure what
Kennedy was serving at her house.I know she has Celiac or something like
that or sorry. I'm driving aroundwhere she lives and there was a fireworks
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show nearby, and there were hundredsand thousands of cars. There was nowhere
to park, so I'm driving towardsher house. And I'm like, I'm
never going to find a parking spot. People were double parked. There was
a bunch of kids in the streetand enjoying themselves. And I pulled up
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to her house and somebody had justleft the parking spot right in front of
her house. I parked right,I mean literally three inches from her driveway.
So I couldn't believe that luck Ihad. So I took my bottle
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of Schmirnov that I bought for theparty as a party gift. I go
high end with the vodka. Iwalked in, I met Kennedy was there
and John cole Belt with his lovelywife Deborah. The cole Belts were there,
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and they have a beautiful, beautifulhome. I guess she's had it
for a long time. A man, is that a spectacular house? So
Kennedy is not hurting for dough.I don't know what she's got going on.
That's one of those beautiful homes I'veever seen in my life. Like
if I had, if I designeda home perfect for me and my wife,
I couldn't do better than that.I would do everything that she did.
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It's unbelievable warm feeling. Everybody therewas kind and there were people walking
around offering samples of the food.What are those people called servers? I
don't know. What are they calledservants? Servants? Servants? And I
said, hey, I said,these people are going around handing out the
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food. It's great. They looklike they're partiers. They don't look like,
you know, they're not dressed upin suit and tie or formal gear.
I like that. That's a nicetouch, Kennedy, and she goes,
Tim, those are friends of mine. They're just offering you a you
know, like a like a sandwichor something. They're not servants, I
thought, And I thought that wasa cool idea. And then she busted
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my balls. But I thought itwas a cool idea to have people at
the house who were servants dressed likepartygoers, where they don't, you know,
they fit right in. Yeah,but man, do she have a
nice house. So Kennedy, thankyou, thank you, thank you.
That was a great invite. Istayed for probably. Oh, let's do
a whip around. How long didI stay at Kennedy's All right, stephush,
(19:42):
You're always the most interesting answer.How long did I stay at Kennedy's
party? I would say two hours? Two hours okay, belly, O
hour and a half one point fiveokay, Elmar. How long did I
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stay at Kennedy's party? Forty fiveminutes? Forty five minutes, I crowd,
I'll go half hour, half hour, Angel, one hour and five
minutes, one hour and five minutes, I Crosier got closest ten minutes.
(20:26):
Tell me that's not true. Askher that's rude. Why did you why?
Why is that rude? Why wouldyou even? Why bother to go?
He doesn't say, waving go,Well, that's rude not to go.
But for ten minutes, did youhave any of the the you said
you ate some of the orders,some of the stuff. No, I
didn't. I didn't now it wasdidn't drink anything either. Nope. You
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walked in the front door. Iwalked in the and made a crack about
her friends serving food, dropped offthe smirnoff, took a photo, and
then left. That's right, God, you're my hero. Take to compliment
and leave. That's exactly what Idid. Compliment nice and leave. That's
how you get out. Oh whata great house you got here, Kennedy.
I'll see you around and watch youon Fox. Gone. You had
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prime parking I had the best parkingspot ever. You would have to be
parked in her house to get acloser spot. And you described this beautiful
home, warm, great food,great company. Why would you leave?
I felt claustrophobic being out of thevalley. Oh my, you know,
but when you ever go anywhere,like when you go to a party at
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Belly, I'll bet you, I'llbet you dollars to donut. It's if
people are still using that term,they're not. Okay, it's easy CPS,
so easy, irish negative, okay, alright, alright, all right,
dovey. I don't know you gotinvolved somehow you got involved. So,
(21:59):
but Belly, when you leave,when you go to Corona or Norco
or you know, for that partyyou always go to, you always go
to some strange location for a party. Corona is a nuts strange I know,
you always feel like like a weirdhouse and you don't really explain who
who's there, you just go.When you go home. But when you
go to Corona and then you comehome, once you get into Irvine,
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don't you feel like I'm back,I'm home. Well, of course you
enjoyed being home. Yeah, Ialso enjoy visiting people when I came up
back to Burbank, I could feelmy whole body. I just loosen up,
like, oh, ten minutes later, I was there for ten I
would say maybe eleven minutes, butI'd say it's probably closer to ten.
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And how long did the drive takeyou to get to it at that hour?
When I left at seven thirty afterthe program, it was only about
thirty five minutes because everybody was wherethey're going to be at seven o'clock.
See, it wasn't a traffic thing, No, it was because I didn't
want to every When I got there, I heard the first kaboom of the
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fireworks. And she lives fairly closeto where they had a professional display,
and so I knew if I stayedthat there was gonna be a bunch of
traffic afterwards. So the first shellthat exploded, I got in the car
and I moved on. How muchlonger was the party going on into the
email? Probably a midnight one too. Yeah, there was a pool part.
There was a pool there. Ithink, you know, people would
have got nude, you know,and really jumped in the pool. Yeah.
(23:27):
Yeah, so obviously people wanted meto stay for that. Yeah,
but I felt like I, youknow, I went to see her and
say thank you for the invite.I brought a nice bottle of vodka Russian
if you're keeping track. And Isaw her and I split and I came
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home, and I think everybody won. You went for the credit. No,
no, no no, I justwent to get there. No,
no, no, no. Icould care less about credit like that.
I went to see her because Itext her often when she says something very
funny on the air, or whenshe has, you know, a great
line or a great show whatever.I constantly text. I'd say maybe once
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or twice a month I text Kennedy. Then why not spend some time chatting
with her? I don't know.I just seemed like she had a lot
of really close personal friends there thatshe probably wanted to spend more time with.
I think, I don't know.You know, people at parties,
especially the hosts, they're like thehardest person to have any sort of conversation
(24:29):
with because it's their party, right, They're worried about everything. But she
wasn't like that. She was dressedup in a red, white and blue
dress. She looked great. Herhusband was a very nice guy, very
funny dude. And everybody there hada great sense of humor, relaxed,
you know, Hawaiian style shirts,shorts, and the food was good.
It was just it was a perfect, perfect party. Kennedy good, perfect
(24:52):
party to leave. I not thatperfect apparently. Oh if you ask Kennedy
who the best guess that that partywas hands down me and I will text
her and she would probably prefer everyonedo the drive by. No, she
wouldn't go through all that trouble ofhaving food and all this for you to
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just show up and leave. ButI think she respected that she had a
lot of really close old personal friendsthere and she didn't want you know,
what was she going to say tome? How's Bellio's mascara? I heard
her complaining on the air she can'tbuy it? Maybe maybe what's going on
with Angel? Does she still havethe tennis elbow? You know, I
(25:36):
don't want to get into that.Yeah, Steph Fush is he really the
vins Scully of sports? I didn'twant to get into it, you know,
the Vince Scully of sports. Crozieris he possibly doing that much work
around his house during the day soI took off? Yeah, I get
it. Yeah, I think sherespects. Did that she expected then,
(26:00):
although she did say it when Iwas leaving. She goes, if that
guy really say duvet instead of yeah, he did see it, Kennedy,
all right, we're live. Wehave to take a Breakah. Sorry,
I thought we already took that break. All right, Sorry, we're live.
I'm kfie. Sorry. You're listeningto Tim Conway Junior on demand from
(26:22):
KFI AM six forty. Over theweekend, there was a thing called the
six two sixth Festival. It wasbeing held at Santa Anita and it's uh,
I don't really understand what it was, but I know he was.
All the food there was Asian,so I don't know if it was Chinese
(26:42):
or Korean or a mix to both, or Japanese or Vietamese. Whatever.
It's a little big little mix everything. Well it makes very six six yeah.
Yeah, but man, it wasgreat. And so I get out
to Santa Anita because I'm gonna betoff track. I'm gonna bet Losal from
Santannita, And all of a suddenthere's a line and they're not racing at
(27:03):
Sandy. They're racing at Losal.But I'm betting at Sandy because I don't
want to drive all the way downto Los Alminos. So I get there
and I'm waiting in line. I'mwaiting in line, and it costs six
bucks to get in unless you're goingto the off track betting, and then
you get in for free and youcan go do that. So I'm waiting.
I'm waiting. I'm waiting, andI get to the front and the
ticket guy at the front looks atme and he goes simulcast off track betting.
(27:30):
I said yeah, and he letsme go in for free. And
the guy behind me said, hey, I stereotyping that guy. Did you
do that because he's white? Andthe guard or the ticket guy says,
no, I did it because ofhis wardrobe. He looked like a guy
(27:51):
who's going to the track. He'sgot stains on his shirt, shorts and
fed up tennis shoes. Did youwear what you're wearing today? Pretty close?
Yeah, So the guy says.The guy behind me says, that's
so insulting that you that you sawhis clothes and you said that's a track
guy, and I just walked away. But what the guy behind me didn't
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know is I know that ticket taker. I've known for thirty years. He
was just busting my balls. Butthe guy behind me thought that he was,
you know, stereotyping me and saying, oh, that guy's a you
know, loser going to the track. But I've known him forever and ever
and ever, so it wasn't abig deal. But but I will say
the food at that six two sixfestival was unbelievable. I didn't venture far
(28:37):
off of what I normally have.I noticed they had octopus balls and I'm
not sure if that was octopus testiclesor octopus rolled up into a round shape.
Yes, but I didn't stick aroundto find out. So you think
it's the ladder, Yeah, youthink it's octopus just rock? Yeah,
right, that's what it is.Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's it's
(28:57):
like a ground up like octom pushbits and like like almost in a breading
almost like a like a uh adumpling, but like a cake pop like
chicken and dumpling like type dumpling dumplinglike that, like a really uh different
cake pops. You could say,a savory cake pop with octopus in it.
(29:17):
But the food was great. Everyone of those boots and every one
of the of the people serving foodthat was unreal. Yeah, it's it's
it's modeled sort of after like allof the open air markets in Asia.
That's why. Oh yeah, yeah, kind of like that's right of it.
Yeah, And I will say thiswithout commenting on other groups, other
races, other religions, all thatstuff. Everybody there very well, behaved,
(29:47):
good time there. My daughter performedat that sixty six couple of years
ago, doing stage. Yeah,so if I've been at that sixty six
couple of times, it's it's great. The food is just phenomenal. It's
anything in everything too, even freesamples of of liquor. Yeah, that's
right that the guy gave me freesample of liquor. And I couldn't believe
it. They even got they evendo like the whole the parmesan where they
got that giant wheel of parmesanes.That's right. They make the pasta right
(30:11):
in that wheel, so you havethat nice. Yeah. And they had
a man. They had kung powchicken. There was unbelievable, the octopus
balls, the fried chicken, theyou know, the hammered down flat fried
chicken with the crust on it.Yes, it was just unbelievable. So
(30:32):
did you find any taketos there.You know, they did have taketos,
but it was like a fish taketoand I sort of bailed on that.
I don't know if I if thatgoes hand in hand or you know,
they've got a last summer. Maybethey do it every summer. They had
a six two six night market overat the Orange Canty Fairgrounds last summer.
Oh is that right? Yeah,I got to do that. Come on
(30:56):
down. I got three tickets foryou. Oh that's great. I love
free tickets. My favorite kind ofticket is absolutely free. All right,
we gotta take break and then we'llcome back. More news on KFI AM
six forty Conway Show on demand onthe iHeartRadio app. Now you can always
hear us live on KFI AM sixforty four to seven pm Monday through Friday,
and anytime on demand on the iHeartRadioapp
It's KFI AM six forty and you'relistening to the Conway Show on demand on
the iHeartRadio app. We've got acrazy I should call him that. Maybe
it's going through A. I don'tknow, some kind of episode at LAX.
But at LAX it's one of thefew places where they demand one hundred
(00:22):
percent order on the runways, thetarmac, the anywhere outside, anywhere past
TSA, even before TSA. Airportsin America demand one hundred percent order.
They want order from the time youpark your car until you get to your
(00:44):
destination. But as long as you'rein the airport system, you're going to
the airport, you're going through TSA, you get on your flight, you
take your flight, you get offyour flight, you go run to car,
and you're done. From airport toairport, they want one hundred percent
order order. They don't want anyonescreaming, they don't want anyone fighting,
(01:04):
They don't want anyone drinking too muchand getting belligerent. If so, you're
gonna lose your flying privileges, andmaybe you should. Maybe you can't fly
with us because you can't behave that'spossible as well. More people should be
on that list. But at LAX, guy walking around the tarmac with his
(01:25):
shirt off, running away from cops. Not order, not order. They
want order and they weren't getting fromthis lad. What's going on with this
guy? Check out this wild videofrom LAX yesterday at cat Oh, that's
great. Even the newscaster it's awild video. It's like, you know,
newscasters see everything, and she's like, how about this wild video?
(01:45):
Check out this wild video from LAXyesterday. A passenger became a right and
ran onto the tarmac Terminal four Airport. Police said the shirt list barefoot man.
Wow, was experience casual. Casualguy on the tarmac, no shirt,
no shoes, Uh, no flight, it's over Polisa. The shirtless
barefoot man was experiencing some type ofmental health crisis. The department is reviewing
(02:08):
the video, which appears to showan officer firing a taser at the man.
Eventually, he was tackled. Policearrested him for battery against an officer.
He was taken to the hospital formental health evaluation. Yeah, I'd
give that guy a break. He'sgoing through something. Health evaluation. Yeah,
he needs a health evaluation. Sothat was kind of a crazy thing.
(02:30):
To see, and then Bellio istelling me the video I was watching
during the break is not old video. I thought that happened in March where
a plane lost its tire. Butyou're saying that that might be another one,
Bellio, it was another one.Wait a minute, there's another plane
that lost another tire. This morning, an entire wheel dropped off a plane
(02:54):
again. Yeah. A United confirmedin a statement that a wheel fell off
the jet as flight one thousand andone departed Lax International around seven am on
its way to Denver. If youwere running, was it bowing? Don't
please don't tell me it's a Boweing, Please please, please, christ I
ton't not tell me that because I'mflying on a Boeing next week and it's
(03:17):
a Boeing seven thirty seven Max.This was a seven fifty seven two hundred
Okay, all right, Well,but wouldn't you think, Pallie, if
you ran Boeing and I think you'ddo a good job or United and the
first tire fell off, wouldn't youround up all the mechanics and go,
guys, check the bolts. Yeah, you got it. Put we got
(03:38):
to tighten those bolts on these uhon these on these tires, because man,
are they important. When we land, I would say, this will
not happen again, yeah, andslam your fist down. Yeah, and
then some of your mascara comes off. You're like, wow, they get
dust cloud in here, bunch ofthe crap you're wearing. Yeah. So
I I don't know what happened,and I don't know what's going on.
(04:02):
But there were two whistle blowers forBoeing and they both got died. They
got died. Is that what happened? They died. Both of them won
by suicide and the other one.We're not sure. But Boeing doesn't mess
around with whistleblowers. They'll just putyou down. Yeah. I don't like
(04:25):
that. So, yeah, theylike their planes, they don't like whistleblowers.
They'll put you they'll put their whistleblowersdown like that. That's right.
Yeah, Although you know what,if we had whistleblowers around here, I'd
look down on those guys too.Like whistleblowers. I don't know. It's
a tattletale. I it doesn't matterif it's Republican, Democrat, big business,
(04:46):
small business. I hate whistleblowers.I hate that term, and I
hate the uh the attitude. Yeah, snitches get stitches right, Yeah,
I don't like whistleblowers. And thenpeople, you know, text me,
oh, well, this chemical isgiving people cancer. And you know,
if you powdered your bowls or Iunderstand that, I get it right,
(05:09):
that some chemicals might not be goodfor you. And there might be a
good or two, you know,one or two whistleblowers that you know are
cool. But I don't like theterm. I don't know, it's it's
weird. I don't like whistle blower. I don't like that term. But
it looks like we have another tirethat has fallen off yet another airplane.
(05:30):
And these aren't tires like on yourcar. These are tires that probably weigh
four or five hundred pounds each,and they're very solid, and when they
start rolling, you know, theairplane's doing about a buck eighty when it
takes off, so after, youknow, shortly after takeoff, that tire
was probably doing two hundred miles anhour as it's rolling down the runway and
slamming into god only knows what.But man, oh man, we got
(05:54):
to get air travel. We gotto get that together. A lot of
people are doing it. This summer, and people don't want their airplanes falling
apart. They'll see more and morewith the warming up of everything, that's
causing so much more turbulence on planesin general. It's like air travel is
just gonna get worse. Apparently,it's gonna it's gonna get crazy, you
(06:15):
know. I mean, they're eventuallythey're gonna have to like fly over the
ocean if you're going to go toyou know, from Phoenix to Seattle.
They're gonna have to come to Lafly over the ocean to Seattle to just
to avoid the turbulence because the turbulenceover these hot states over Nevada is wild.
Man. Would you fly to Vegasin the summer, that's a that's
a forty five minute carnival ride.Like last week, the guy ended up
(06:38):
in the carry on luggage of crackup top. I'm bowing and settled down,
and all they see your feet hangingdown. That's okay. I'd love
to have seen that, right.You know, guy ignores the seatbelt sign.
It's for cowards. I think everybody'salways like, wait a minute,
isn't the ceiling that we see isthat the other side of that air I
(07:01):
guess not gets launched into the ceiling. It's horrible, it's so terrible.
But he's on the way to,you know, see his daughter get married.
Don't want to go anyway. Youknow, it's painting the ash he
moved out. It's got to goto Boston to see her get married.
It's gonna be expensive, it's gonnabe gifts. You got to give a
(07:25):
speech that you don't really believe in, to say the whole deal, and
then bang you get out a flightand it launches you into the ceiling.
Literally. But I guarantee you thoughthat after people see that, a lot
more people are wearing their seatbelts theentire flight. You hear it, and
(07:45):
there's no more, you know,there's no more waiting at the bathroom in
the back like I'll hold it.I'll wait till I get home and use
the debate, do they When theplane settles down and everybody sees the legs,
then you just hear click throughout theplane. Right. What's his name?
There's a comedian, there's a veryfunny comedian who said, I can't
(08:09):
remember his name, but the planethat went from Honolulu to Maui and the
roof blew off, and you know, so they're flying without the roof of
the plane, and a very funnycomedian said, I would reach for the
stewardess button, which is not thereanymore, and then I'd flagger down and
go, excuse me, ma'am,everybody in this road needs another drink.
(08:35):
Oh that's funny stuff. I can'tremember the comic that said that. I'll
find out during the break as Igot to give the guy credit. Very
funny man. You're listening to TimConway Junior on demand from kf I AM
six forty. I found the comedianthat said that did a bit about the
roof flying off the plane. Iremember what year that happened. I think
(08:56):
it was in the seventies or eighties, but I do remember watching that.
It was a plane that left Ithink it was Loha Airlines Aloha, but
it left Honolulu and it was goingto Maui, and about halfway through that
what is it twenty five minute flightmax, the roof came off the plane.
So the people sitting in first classwere looking at the sky and there
(09:18):
was no roof. There was noluggage rag, there was no swortus button,
no little air conditioner, no lightsnothinge eight by the way, eighty
eight Wow, okay, what abig year. Eighty eight Dodgers win the
World Series, Lakers win the Championship, and this plane malfunctions. So his
name is Jake Johansen. I've notseen him around lately, but truly one
(09:41):
of the funniest comedians in the world. I love this guy. Whatever this
guy was playing locally here, Iwould always get up and take a shave
and go see him at a comedystore or I don't know, one of
those comedy clubs. He was great, and I don't know what happened.
I don't know if he's still aroundor if he's still doing comedy or what.
(10:01):
But a very original guy, originalthought. So I think this is
the bit here. Let me playit for you and see if you agree.
Their disasters, because I now crashing, I'm not so scared of that
anymore. I feel safe about that. The one that scares me is the
top coming off, because how doyou emotionally get ready for? What are
(10:26):
you thinking when that top peoples?You know, my drink or worse,
you're sitting next to the guy whogets sucked out of you. Yeah,
I think I would have to callthe flight attendant. I know they're busy,
but somebody get sucked out. Ifeel like they should know I punched
(10:48):
a button. I'd be kind ofhard to break that to him once they
got to your seat, you know. Oh hi, Yeah, I called.
He's gone. We need more drinks. That's great. The very funny
(11:13):
guy occuring out the Comedy Store andalso on another network. He's doing another
show on another network, Ladies andGentlemen, Jake Johansson. Very nice to
see you, very nice to seeyou, but very very original guy Belly,
Can you find out where he is? You're always good at tracking people
down. You got it all right, thank you. Big commotion still at
(11:35):
the homeowner Gil Leaves on Channel fiveis high over this shooting in Valley Village,
North Hollywood, where three chaps decidedto break into a home another guy.
A guy was home when it happened, and then they shot and shot
(11:56):
one of the guys. The othertwo guys got away. But it's on
Magnolia and Coal Fax. It's onchannel five right now. Can we pull
that up, Stefrere you go.Homeowner shoots suspect the intruder. It's a
big deal. A lot of streetsare closed there on Coalfact Helicopter Magnolia.
(12:18):
I'm clear if there's an additional suspectthat may have been with that mail that
was shot, there is definitely asearch underway. But again, one person
shot here in the eleven thousand,six hundred block of Addison Street this afternoon.
That's the latest overhead up at Skyfive. I'll send it back to
you in the studio. There yougo, Addison, coal Fax, Magnolia.
A lot of big homes there.A lot of people decided that they
(12:39):
want property instead of just a housethat is a mansion right next to another
house. You know, in OrangeCounty you get a lot of them where
you know you will own a fivethousand square foot home and if you reach
out the window, you can touchthe neighbor's window. And a lot of
wealthy people don't like that, sothey buy homes on Magnolia where you can
(13:00):
get a half acre or acre twoacres and pretend you're rich, pretend,
pretend richie in the valley, becausethat equivalent home in Orange County is three
feet from your neighbor. But inthe valley you got a half acre,
three quarters of an acre. Youcan stretch out and enjoy yourself. That's
(13:24):
why people live there. Ding dong. All right, I don't want to
steal this from Petro some money,but real quick. People have been asking
what we did on July fourth.Krozier, Let's begin with you. What
did you do on July fourth tocelebrate our independence? Uh? Well,
after I left here, went backhome and Jen's daughter had a party with
(13:46):
a bunch of friends out in thebackyard. But by the time I got
there, Jen had started up thejacuza. Oh no, please don't tell
me you did that again. Wedid the jacuzzi with the fireworks right from
the water. So you when yourdaughters were Jen's daughter's friends were all over,
you made them leave so you canget into jacuzzi nude. No,
we just told him we were goingto do that. They were free to
(14:07):
leave or stay. Or did yousuit up to get in? Sure?
Yeah? And then off comes thesuit, you know, and all of
a sudden wandering feet the day offreedom. Tim All right, freedom,
Stephan, you worked right, Isure did. Yeah. It sucks,
elliot. What did you do?Family? Like barbecue and pool and jacuzzi?
(14:30):
Wow? It was fabulous. Ohthat was kind of cool. Would
you do? Elmer? What'd youdo for July fourth? Anything interesting?
Oh? No, I was editingall day long, but I finished the
second cut of the short film,so wow. Productive. Looking for a
duvet cover? Angel? What didyou do on July fourth to celebrate our
independence? I reported on traffic.It was awesome to what time? Oh
(14:58):
until seven, to the end ofyour show. But then after that,
you know, I've got a dogand she gets really scared during the fireworks
that are going off everywhere, soI stayed at home just to keep her
calm, and I saw some fireworksand stuff from home. So it was
a lot of fun. That's cool, Yeah, very very cool. All
(15:20):
right, I guess it's me.I guess my turn, right, everybody
else has spoken, Oh yeah,what would you do? I was invited
to a celebrities house who listens tothe show in Pacific Palisades and we come
back. I'll tell you who thatwas. But it was a big celebrity
(15:41):
who invited me to their house,her house, and I went. I
usually don't go, Yeah, Idon't let you go. I'd like to
drive on July fourth because people aredrinking and crazy, but I went because
I really liked this person and Ithought she I think she's great. So
I'll tell you who that is.We'll come back. You're listening to Tim
(16:04):
Conway Junior on demand from KFI AMsix forty. Hey, I got an
invite from my celebrity. I neverget invites from celebrities, but on July
fourth, I got an invite,like two weeks before. It was an
evite. I like evites, easyto say no, easy to just say
uh no. E Z. TheE stands for e Z to say no.
(16:29):
And it was for a lovely womanwho I've known for years, who
used to host this well not thisslot, but the evening slot. It
was Kennedy from Fox News, andshe invited me to her party. My
wife couldn't go because she was committedto another event, so I left here
(16:51):
on July fourth, went straight toDel Taco. Wasn't really quite sure what
Kennedy was serving at her house.I know she has Celiac or something like
that or sorry. I'm driving aroundwhere she lives and there was a fireworks
(17:12):
show nearby, and there were hundredsand thousands of cars. There was nowhere
to park, so I'm driving towardsher house. And I'm like, I'm
never going to find a parking spot. People were double parked. There was
a bunch of kids in the streetand enjoying themselves. And I pulled up
(17:33):
to her house and somebody had justleft the parking spot right in front of
her house. I parked right,I mean literally three inches from her driveway.
So I couldn't believe that luck Ihad. So I took my bottle
(17:53):
of Schmirnov that I bought for theparty as a party gift. I go
high end with the vodka. Iwalked in, I met Kennedy was there
and John cole Belt with his lovelywife Deborah. The cole Belts were there,
(18:15):
and they have a beautiful, beautifulhome. I guess she's had it
for a long time. A man, is that a spectacular house? So
Kennedy is not hurting for dough.I don't know what she's got going on.
That's one of those beautiful homes I'veever seen in my life. Like
if I had, if I designeda home perfect for me and my wife,
I couldn't do better than that.I would do everything that she did.
(18:38):
It's unbelievable warm feeling. Everybody therewas kind and there were people walking
around offering samples of the food.What are those people called servers? I
don't know. What are they calledservants? Servants? Servants? And I
said, hey, I said,these people are going around handing out the
(19:00):
food. It's great. They looklike they're partiers. They don't look like,
you know, they're not dressed upin suit and tie or formal gear.
I like that. That's a nicetouch, Kennedy, and she goes,
Tim, those are friends of mine. They're just offering you a you
know, like a like a sandwichor something. They're not servants, I
thought, And I thought that wasa cool idea. And then she busted
(19:22):
my balls. But I thought itwas a cool idea to have people at
the house who were servants dressed likepartygoers, where they don't, you know,
they fit right in. Yeah,but man, do she have a
nice house. So Kennedy, thankyou, thank you, thank you.
That was a great invite. Istayed for probably. Oh, let's do
a whip around. How long didI stay at Kennedy's All right, stephush,
(19:42):
You're always the most interesting answer.How long did I stay at Kennedy's
party? I would say two hours? Two hours okay, belly, O
hour and a half one point fiveokay, Elmar. How long did I
(20:03):
stay at Kennedy's party? Forty fiveminutes? Forty five minutes, I crowd,
I'll go half hour, half hour, Angel, one hour and five
minutes, one hour and five minutes, I Crosier got closest ten minutes.
(20:26):
Tell me that's not true. Askher that's rude. Why did you why?
Why is that rude? Why wouldyou even? Why bother to go?
He doesn't say, waving go,Well, that's rude not to go.
But for ten minutes, did youhave any of the the you said
you ate some of the orders,some of the stuff. No, I
didn't. I didn't now it wasdidn't drink anything either. Nope. You
(20:48):
walked in the front door. Iwalked in the and made a crack about
her friends serving food, dropped offthe smirnoff, took a photo, and
then left. That's right, God, you're my hero. Take to compliment
and leave. That's exactly what Idid. Compliment nice and leave. That's
how you get out. Oh whata great house you got here, Kennedy.
I'll see you around and watch youon Fox. Gone. You had
(21:12):
prime parking I had the best parkingspot ever. You would have to be
parked in her house to get acloser spot. And you described this beautiful
home, warm, great food,great company. Why would you leave?
I felt claustrophobic being out of thevalley. Oh my, you know,
but when you ever go anywhere,like when you go to a party at
(21:33):
Belly, I'll bet you, I'llbet you dollars to donut. It's if
people are still using that term,they're not. Okay, it's easy CPS,
so easy, irish negative, okay, alright, alright, all right,
dovey. I don't know you gotinvolved somehow you got involved. So,
(21:59):
but Belly, when you leave,when you go to Corona or Norco
or you know, for that partyyou always go to, you always go
to some strange location for a party. Corona is a nuts strange I know,
you always feel like like a weirdhouse and you don't really explain who
who's there, you just go.When you go home. But when you
go to Corona and then you comehome, once you get into Irvine,
(22:21):
don't you feel like I'm back,I'm home. Well, of course you
enjoyed being home. Yeah, Ialso enjoy visiting people when I came up
back to Burbank, I could feelmy whole body. I just loosen up,
like, oh, ten minutes later, I was there for ten I
would say maybe eleven minutes, butI'd say it's probably closer to ten.
(22:42):
And how long did the drive takeyou to get to it at that hour?
When I left at seven thirty afterthe program, it was only about
thirty five minutes because everybody was wherethey're going to be at seven o'clock.
See, it wasn't a traffic thing, No, it was because I didn't
want to every When I got there, I heard the first kaboom of the
(23:03):
fireworks. And she lives fairly closeto where they had a professional display,
and so I knew if I stayedthat there was gonna be a bunch of
traffic afterwards. So the first shellthat exploded, I got in the car
and I moved on. How muchlonger was the party going on into the
email? Probably a midnight one too. Yeah, there was a pool part.
There was a pool there. Ithink, you know, people would
have got nude, you know,and really jumped in the pool. Yeah.
(23:27):
Yeah, so obviously people wanted meto stay for that. Yeah,
but I felt like I, youknow, I went to see her and
say thank you for the invite.I brought a nice bottle of vodka Russian
if you're keeping track. And Isaw her and I split and I came
(23:47):
home, and I think everybody won. You went for the credit. No,
no, no no, I justwent to get there. No,
no, no, no. Icould care less about credit like that.
I went to see her because Itext her often when she says something very
funny on the air, or whenshe has, you know, a great
line or a great show whatever.I constantly text. I'd say maybe once
(24:08):
or twice a month I text Kennedy. Then why not spend some time chatting
with her? I don't know.I just seemed like she had a lot
of really close personal friends there thatshe probably wanted to spend more time with.
I think, I don't know.You know, people at parties,
especially the hosts, they're like thehardest person to have any sort of conversation
(24:29):
with because it's their party, right, They're worried about everything. But she
wasn't like that. She was dressedup in a red, white and blue
dress. She looked great. Herhusband was a very nice guy, very
funny dude. And everybody there hada great sense of humor, relaxed,
you know, Hawaiian style shirts,shorts, and the food was good.
It was just it was a perfect, perfect party. Kennedy good, perfect
(24:52):
party to leave. I not thatperfect apparently. Oh if you ask Kennedy
who the best guess that that partywas hands down me and I will text
her and she would probably prefer everyonedo the drive by. No, she
wouldn't go through all that trouble ofhaving food and all this for you to
(25:14):
just show up and leave. ButI think she respected that she had a
lot of really close old personal friendsthere and she didn't want you know,
what was she going to say tome? How's Bellio's mascara? I heard
her complaining on the air she can'tbuy it? Maybe maybe what's going on
with Angel? Does she still havethe tennis elbow? You know, I
(25:36):
don't want to get into that.Yeah, Steph Fush is he really the
vins Scully of sports? I didn'twant to get into it, you know,
the Vince Scully of sports. Crozieris he possibly doing that much work
around his house during the day soI took off? Yeah, I get
it. Yeah, I think sherespects. Did that she expected then,
(26:00):
although she did say it when Iwas leaving. She goes, if that
guy really say duvet instead of yeah, he did see it, Kennedy,
all right, we're live. Wehave to take a Breakah. Sorry,
I thought we already took that break. All right, Sorry, we're live.
I'm kfie. Sorry. You're listeningto Tim Conway Junior on demand from
(26:22):
KFI AM six forty. Over theweekend, there was a thing called the
six two sixth Festival. It wasbeing held at Santa Anita and it's uh,
I don't really understand what it was, but I know he was.
All the food there was Asian,so I don't know if it was Chinese
(26:42):
or Korean or a mix to both, or Japanese or Vietamese. Whatever.
It's a little big little mix everything. Well it makes very six six yeah.
Yeah, but man, it wasgreat. And so I get out
to Santa Anita because I'm gonna betoff track. I'm gonna bet Losal from
Santannita, And all of a suddenthere's a line and they're not racing at
(27:03):
Sandy. They're racing at Losal.But I'm betting at Sandy because I don't
want to drive all the way downto Los Alminos. So I get there
and I'm waiting in line. I'mwaiting in line, and it costs six
bucks to get in unless you're goingto the off track betting, and then
you get in for free and youcan go do that. So I'm waiting.
I'm waiting. I'm waiting, andI get to the front and the
ticket guy at the front looks atme and he goes simulcast off track betting.
(27:30):
I said yeah, and he letsme go in for free. And
the guy behind me said, hey, I stereotyping that guy. Did you
do that because he's white? Andthe guard or the ticket guy says,
no, I did it because ofhis wardrobe. He looked like a guy
(27:51):
who's going to the track. He'sgot stains on his shirt, shorts and
fed up tennis shoes. Did youwear what you're wearing today? Pretty close?
Yeah, So the guy says.The guy behind me says, that's
so insulting that you that you sawhis clothes and you said that's a track
guy, and I just walked away. But what the guy behind me didn't
(28:11):
know is I know that ticket taker. I've known for thirty years. He
was just busting my balls. Butthe guy behind me thought that he was,
you know, stereotyping me and saying, oh, that guy's a you
know, loser going to the track. But I've known him forever and ever
and ever, so it wasn't abig deal. But but I will say
the food at that six two sixfestival was unbelievable. I didn't venture far
(28:37):
off of what I normally have.I noticed they had octopus balls and I'm
not sure if that was octopus testiclesor octopus rolled up into a round shape.
Yes, but I didn't stick aroundto find out. So you think
it's the ladder, Yeah, youthink it's octopus just rock? Yeah,
right, that's what it is.Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's it's
(28:57):
like a ground up like octom pushbits and like like almost in a breading
almost like a like a uh adumpling, but like a cake pop like
chicken and dumpling like type dumpling dumplinglike that, like a really uh different
cake pops. You could say,a savory cake pop with octopus in it.
(29:17):
But the food was great. Everyone of those boots and every one
of the of the people serving foodthat was unreal. Yeah, it's it's
it's modeled sort of after like allof the open air markets in Asia.
That's why. Oh yeah, yeah, kind of like that's right of it.
Yeah, And I will say thiswithout commenting on other groups, other
races, other religions, all thatstuff. Everybody there very well, behaved,
(29:47):
good time there. My daughter performedat that sixty six couple of years
ago, doing stage. Yeah,so if I've been at that sixty six
couple of times, it's it's great. The food is just phenomenal. It's
anything in everything too, even freesamples of of liquor. Yeah, that's
right that the guy gave me freesample of liquor. And I couldn't believe
it. They even got they evendo like the whole the parmesan where they
got that giant wheel of parmesanes.That's right. They make the pasta right
(30:11):
in that wheel, so you havethat nice. Yeah. And they had
a man. They had kung powchicken. There was unbelievable, the octopus
balls, the fried chicken, theyou know, the hammered down flat fried
chicken with the crust on it.Yes, it was just unbelievable. So
(30:32):
did you find any taketos there.You know, they did have taketos,
but it was like a fish taketoand I sort of bailed on that.
I don't know if I if thatgoes hand in hand or you know,
they've got a last summer. Maybethey do it every summer. They had
a six two six night market overat the Orange Canty Fairgrounds last summer.
Oh is that right? Yeah,I got to do that. Come on
(30:56):
down. I got three tickets foryou. Oh that's great. I love
free tickets. My favorite kind ofticket is absolutely free. All right,
we gotta take break and then we'llcome back. More news on KFI AM
six forty Conway Show on demand onthe iHeartRadio app. Now you can always
hear us live on KFI AM sixforty four to seven pm Monday through Friday,
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