April 26, 2023 • 30 mins
On this episode of Five to Thrive Live, co-hosts Lise Alschuler and Karolyn Gazella will share the importance of finding and spending time in your Happy Places. They will share some of their happy places and what they experience when there. They will also discuss the rejuvenation benefits of happy places like gratitude, serenity, security and awe.
Five To Thrive Live is broadcast live Tuesdays at 7PM ET.
Five To Thrive Live Radio Show is broadcast on W4CS Radio – The Cancer Support Network (www.w4cs.com) part of Talk 4 Radio (www.talk4radio.com) on the Talk 4 Media Network (www.talk4media.com).
Five To Thrive Live Podcast is also available on Talk 4 Podcasting (www.talk4podcasting.com), iHeartRadio, Amazon Music, Pandora, Spotify, Audible, and over 100 other podcast outlets.
Five To Thrive Live is broadcast live Tuesdays at 7PM ET.
Five To Thrive Live Radio Show is broadcast on W4CS Radio – The Cancer Support Network (www.w4cs.com) part of Talk 4 Radio (www.talk4radio.com) on the Talk 4 Media Network (www.talk4media.com).
Five To Thrive Live Podcast is also available on Talk 4 Podcasting (www.talk4podcasting.com), iHeartRadio, Amazon Music, Pandora, Spotify, Audible, and over 100 other podcast outlets.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
Any health related information on the followingshow provides general information only. Content presented
on any show by any host orguests should not be substituted for a doctor's
advice. Always consult your physician beforebeginning any new diet, exercise, or
treatment program. Good Welcome to fiveto Thrive Live, a podcast about thriving
(00:43):
for those who have been affected bycancer and chronic disease. I'm doctor Lisa
Steeler and I'm here with my goodbuddy Carolyn Gazella. Hi. Carolyn,
Hey, Hi, how are youlease? I'm good. It's so nice
to be here with you down thisshow. Yes, I love it when
we do our shows together. AndI have to be honest. I mean,
you picked tonight's topic and it isbrilliant. I think it's going to
(01:08):
become one of my new favorite topics. Okay, well we shall see.
But before you get to that,if this is your first time with us,
you can find all of our pastshow podcasts on any major podcast outlook
out lit and you can also findour schedule on I thrive plan dot com.
And so, yeah, today we'regoing to be talking about happy places.
(01:30):
And I will just say at thispoint that finding your happy places and
spending time in your happy places canbe life changing. We're going to explain
more about that later, but Ido want to thank our sponsors who make
five to Thrive Live possible. First, we have Gaya Herbs, who for
more than thirty five years, hasbeen on a mission to connect people,
plants, and planet to create healingwith expensive experience manufacturing high quality botanical products.
(01:57):
Guya Herbs has products for healthcare consumersand a dedicated product line named Gaya
Pro, which is tailored to healthcarepractitioners. So practitioners can learn more at
Gaya herbspro dot com. Consumers canvisit Gaya erbs dot com. We also
thank Emuse, a unique patented postbioticthat gives your immune system a key advantage.
(02:21):
Amuse is an ingredient in many immunesupporting dietary supplements. You look for
Amuse on the label or you cango to imusehealth dot com. We also
thank cognisance aticoline, nature's way ofkeeping the brains energy producing centers firing on
all cylinders. So if you're lookingfor a way to enhance your brain function,
including your memory, focus, andattention, look for cognisant on the
(02:44):
label. Of your favorite brain healthproduct or go to Cognisant dot com for
more information. Doctor or Hires Probioticsis a best selling probiotic for over thirty
years. Contains twelve probiotic strains whichare shelf stable without refrigeration due to their
unk three year fermentation process, andyou can learn more at doctor or hero
probiotics dot com. And finally,pro Thrivers Sleep, a melatonin based sleep
(03:08):
formula specifically created for thrivers. ProthriversSleep is available through your healthcare provider or
online at Pure Formulas dot com.Okay, well, great job. Yeah
we've got some great sponsors. Yes, we do, so, Carolyn,
on this episode, when we sayhappy place, we are talking specifically about
(03:32):
what are we talking about actual placesor environments? That's I think what I
mean. But I want to sortof get your agreement on that, and
then if you agree, why isour environment so important? Okay? Well,
first of all, I personally lovecreating happy spaces. I love talking
about my happy space, but mostlyI love being in my happy spaces.
(03:55):
Hey, and you're right, weare talking about environments and and you know,
research really shows that our surroundings havea direct influence on our mental,
emotional, spiritual, and physical health. You know, for example, having
plants in our environment or even specialpaintings or pictures can have a calming effect.
(04:17):
And and as you mentioned, Lease, you and I love to talk
about the healing benefits of being outsidein nature. So our outside environment,
now, those natural environments have tonsof health benefits including you know, we
have less anxiety, less depression,and just better overall physical health. You
(04:39):
know, being out in nature,you know it might even help us live
longer. That's what the research tellsus. And now there's this new concept
that's emerged called nature deficit disorder,and that describes people who lack a connection
to nature, which can be harmfulto health. So at least today we're
(05:00):
talking about happy places and natural environments. So what makes these places happy?
Right? So, I think,first of all, in order to feel
happy in a place, one hasto be present, One has to be
aware of their place. So thevery first attribute that a happy place calls
(05:21):
forward is the attribute of presence.And it's when we take a moment to
be present, when we can absorband appreciate with gratitude the world around us.
We get a sense of awe anda sense of wonder and delight,
and that is all feel good stuff. Our endorphins. Are you going through
(05:45):
the roof, We've got oxytocin beingstimulated. These are all chemicals that are
secreted by are the very kind ofoldest part of our brain that's programmed literally
to respond to our environment. AndI think that you know put, So,
if we're seeking these kind of feelingsin our life, a sense of
gratitude, a sense of belonging,a sense of awe, a sense of
(06:09):
wonder, then the environment within whichwe are can actually facilitate that state of
being. So I really I thinkfor me, when I think about a
happy place, it's really both aplace, but it's also a presence,
our presence in that place, andtogether those things create this deep sense of
(06:32):
happiness. Not that fleeting sense ofhappiness, but a very deep, profound
sense of happiness. So, Carolyn, what is one of your happy places?
Well, this is an easy onefor me right away, because,
as you know, least, Ilike to combine nature with animals. So
(06:57):
my happiest place of all is theranch where I keep my horses, and
it becomes even happier when I canbring my dog Riley. So, you
know, you what you were justtalking about really resonated with me because I
think, I think you're right.It's a place, it's presence in that
place, but it's also how youfeel in that place, you know.
So something to keep in mind aboutour happy places is that it seems like
(07:23):
to me, my happy places engageall of my senses. You know,
I actually love the smell of thehorses the Hey, I even like the
smell of horsepoop. Please, thereyou have it. I just admitted it.
But you know what, I alsolove the sights and the sounds and
the feeling of brushing the horse,you know, the smell of the leather
(07:46):
saddle. You know, I'm moreengaged with my environment when I'm activating all
of these senses, and it becomesmore special to me. Um. You
know, it's almost like a movingmeditation because I'm so fully engaged and not
distracted and being fully present. Likeyou mentioned, that's what makes my special
(08:11):
places special, and that's that's reallywhat creates. I mean, when I
combine nature and animals, I amthe happiest that I that I am,
and I'm I'm calm, I'm relaxedand I'm grounded, and um, these
are the things that I'm looking forwhen I create my happy places. So
(08:33):
so at least, what are what'sone of your happy places? Yeah?
And I have to say before Ishare that I've seen you in your happy
place and it's a beautiful thing.So all of what you said is very
true. In fact, my littlepicture of you that comes up on this
skype calls you on the ranch withyour horses. Yeah. So um yeah.
(08:56):
For me, gosh, I've somany happy places it's hard to even
begin. But I think the oneI'm going to talk about is the one
that I am fortunate enough to experienceon a daily basis, and that's my
backyard. So I live in inthe Tucson Desert, which is a very
lush desert actually, so there's lotsof trees, lots of plants, and
(09:20):
my back patio area is raised abovea wash, which is basically a dried
up river bed or arroyo, andso I have that in this big expanse
of natural vegetation off to one side, and then I have a mountain range
on the other side, and treesare in and amongst that, and so
I go out there every morning todo my meditation, and it's just such
(09:43):
a beautiful, calming, exciting,exhilarating place. There's certain birds I know,
and I look for them on theircertain cacti, and you know,
I feel the breeze sort of gentlytussles my against my skin, and it's
just all of it just to meis so I just feels so good.
(10:07):
I don't know how to describe it. It's like a it's like a feeling
of like when you settle into achair that's just right and like, ah,
you can just kind of relax,but you're not like falling asleep relaxed.
You're relaxed in this kind of excitedstate of Oh my gosh, the
world is so incredible. So that'sone of my happy places. Well,
(10:28):
you know, I've been to thathappy place and it's beautiful. And it's
interesting because I have the same feelingwhen I sit out in your backyard and
yeah, it's it's it's beautiful.Yeah. So you know, nature obviously
is really healing, and I thinkthat's pretty much true across the board for
most people. So you know,there's scientific reasons for this that we could
(10:50):
discuss, but let's put the scienceaside. For a moment, just why
do you think nature is so profoundlyhealing? Really? You want me to
put the side it's aside. Gosh, I love reading I love reading the
research on nature just because it's soaffirming. But okay, let's put that
aside. And you know, Ithink nature is so profoundly healing for several
(11:13):
reasons. Like we both have mentioned, nature helps us be fully present.
And anytime we can be fully presentis a good thing. When we're having
a conversation with a friend, afamily member, whatever, being present is
a very good thing. But forme, it goes beyond that. Nature
(11:35):
becomes a spiritual experience. And thereason it's spiritual to me is because it
does it's infused with gratitude. Youknow, you were talking about awe,
and every time I'm in nature,I am in awe of the splendor,
the beauty, the activity. Youknow, you mentioned birds. I too,
(11:58):
am a bird person, and herein New Mexico we have amazing birds
and they're very active and engaging,and all of that comes from nature.
And to me that that's almost likea spiritual experience. Um. You know,
I think anytime we can tap intogratitude and appreciation. Um, that's
(12:20):
that's going to have health benefits.We know, I mean, I know
I'm not supposed to talk about thereason, but we know that appreciation and
gratitude is very very healing. Ithas many health benefits. And I feel
that gratitude is is really the foundationof my spiritual practice on a daily basis.
(12:41):
So, UM, I think thatwhen we can shift our perspective into
that positive feeling of awe and youknow, inspiration. Um, I think
that's what nature does for us.UM. And I think these that shifting
of person perspective kind of helps makeour happy places happy. So, so
(13:05):
how do you feel about that?Would you agree with that? I mean,
there's so many ways in which thatshows up. I think we've all
had the experience of wrestling with aproblem, for example, and then we
just go out and take a walk, maybe even not the same day,
and boom, the solution pops intoour mind. Or we're having difficult exchange
with somebody, and then we moveourselves out of that environment into nature and
(13:31):
get a sense of peace with that. And I think that's about perspective.
I think somebody wants to join theconversation. Yeah, So I just let
that let that little being out.So I think another aspect of perspective though,
or yeah, shifting in perspective isis the actual nature that we're in.
(13:54):
So, for example, if ifI'm in a place where there are
some really big trees, I mightlook up up the tree and just looking
at how big the tree is andhow far up into the sky it reaches
and how strong the bark is,it just makes me feel different in my
life, and it reminds me ofattributes like solidity and groundedness and extension and
(14:20):
reaching and you know things that arejust maybe I'm not verbalizing all those words
in my head, but I'm internalizingthose and I bring those new perspectives back
into the rest of my day orinto the next moment, and there's okay,
so I'm going to go into researchtoo, but we can't help ourselves.
(14:41):
There is some research on this too. You know. There's been some
studies that have shown that kids thatgrow up with green vistas, so that
they have the ability to look outand see kind of a horizon line,
they actually have higher levels of cognitivefunction, so that their brain is literally
programmed to see the world of possibilitydifferently. So they problem solve differently,
(15:03):
and I think that if so thatyou know that, and that makes sense.
It's just sort of logical. Soif we give ourselves the opportunity to
be in different environments, to payattention to the environment that we're in,
we will change the way our brainfunctions. We don't even have to name
it, or we don't have totry to figure it out. All we
(15:26):
have to do is just experience it, which is the other beautiful thing that's
such a good point. And themore we experience it, the more it
becomes second nature. You know.It's interesting because you're talking about shifting perspective
and one thing that occurs to me, and it popped into my head when
you were talking about looking at thetree, because this is what happens when
I see the mountains. So herein Santa Fe, New Mexico, we're
(15:48):
surrounded by beautiful mountain escapes, andevery time, every time I see a
glimpse of the mountain, it causesme to pause, slow down, and
again have this gratitude like, wow, how beautiful is that mountain? And
it's so grand and so I evenjust the pausing and the slowing down,
(16:14):
and then the mountain as a cuefor gratitude. I gotta tell you,
at least I see those mountains allthe time. That's a lot of cues
for gratitude. Yeah, and that'sactually a known practice in positive psychology called
savoring and pairing. So you know, it's it's it basically goes like this,
Like, for you, you lookat those mountains, So you one
(16:37):
would start with this practice as kindof a conscious effort. So you look
at the mountains, you recognize thefeeling that it inspires and new. So
let's say I look at the mountainand I think that just inspires a sense
of solidity, comfort, and maybesecurity. I'm just kind of making this
up as I go, right,So then I really internalize that, and
(17:00):
I just keep looking at the mountainsand repeat those attributes to myself about ten
times in a row. And thenthe next day I look at the mountains
again, I do the same exerciseand repeat those attributes about ten times in
a row. And I do thatfor five to ten days in a row.
And I'm what I'm doing now isI'm actually rewiring my brain. So
my brain is literally starting to createnew neuronal connections that are associating that mountain
(17:26):
with those attributes that I gave it, security, comfort, etc. And
then from then on, once Iget that wiring in place, if I'm
nowhere near those mountains, I'm ina stressful, scary situation, I close
my eyes for a second, Iimagine the mountains. Immediately my brain will
bring up the associated feelings of security, comfort, etc. So it's a
(17:51):
fabulous way to give yourself a toolthat you can take with you wherever you
are, so you can basically internalizeyour happy places and the associated motions absolutely,
And it reminds me of the workof BJ Fogg when he talks about
changing behaviors, and so he talksabout a queue, like you have a
queue and then you do the behavioryou want at that queue. So like,
(18:14):
let's say I'm trying to have moregratitude in my life, my mountains
are the queue I give myself gratitudemessages, etc. Etc. And I
think what you're also talking about ishow we can use the power of visualization.
And what I hear you saying isthis doesn't have to be some long
drawn out visualization practice. You're justpopping that that image into your mind during
(18:38):
your stressful event, possibly taking acouple of few deep breaths, and all
of a sudden, you're happy.Places now helped you deal with that stressful
event right exactly, And it canbe very instantaneous. I remember teaching this
practice to a patient, and thenext time I saw the patient, she
said, you know, I justhave to tell you that I did that.
(19:00):
I found a place that really gaveme, you know, feelings of
serenity and got it kind of wiredinto my brain. And I found myself
in a very difficult conversation with myboss and I was getting really upset.
So I just took a moment,I imagined my place, and I immediately
felt more serene, and it completelychanged the dynamic of my conversation with my
(19:22):
boss. And I mean that wasyou know, it's a small little example,
but that is profound. Imagine ifwe can do that kind of in
and out, weave it in andout of our day, we can create
a day that's a very different kindof experience than we would otherwise have had.
I mean, if she didn't dothat, she would have been upset.
She would have come home upset,she would have you know, perseverated
(19:45):
on the conversation. She would havehad to figure out how to you know,
make it right the next day.I mean, you know, it
really can change her life in verysmall but profound ways. Yeah, I
mean this makes our happy place atool that we can use to to navigate
life. Um So, so what'sanother happy place for you? Lease?
You must have? We don't havea long enough show to discuss your so
(20:10):
many, so many, but I'mgonna go. I'm gonna I'm gonna surprise
you at this one because I recentlyexperienced this. So I was I have
a convertible car, and that convertiblewith the top down is definitely a happy
place for me. So I wasdriving my convertible. The weather was perfect,
like beautiful temperature, it was kindof the sun was setting, so
(20:33):
the sky was spectacular, which Icould see everywhere. Because my convertible top
was down, I had some ofmy very favorite music playing rather loudly,
so I was kind of enveloped inthis wonderful sound. I was definitely in
my happy place in that moment.For sure. It's funny because I know
(20:53):
you're a car girl, and Icould I have ridden with you in a
convertible, so I can totally seethat that would be a very happy place.
And another thing I like about yourhappy place is that it's it's very
simple, you know, it's it'snothing complex, you know. Yeah,
(21:15):
I definitely can see that that wouldbe a happy place for you. Were
you not surprised even a little?A little yeah, a little? Okay?
All right, well, okay,right back at you. So what's
another happy place for you? Youknow, this one's gonna surprise you?
Maybe I don't know. Well,you know, we've we've we've been friends
for thirty years, so there's probablyaren't a lot of surprises. Okay,
So you know I was talking about, you know, our happy place can
(21:38):
be simple, and it doesn't necessarilyneed to be outdoors. So for me,
one of my happy places is sittingon my rocking chair in the dark,
waiting for the sun to rise inthe morning. Sometimes I'm gonna have
classical music playing softly in the background, and sometimes I'm just gonna sit there
(22:00):
in silence, rocking in my rockingchair. When when it's chilly, I'm
going to turn on the fireplace,which is right next to my rocking chair.
And I have to tell you,it's a great way to start my
day. It's very grounding. Butit's also very simple. But it makes
me happy, you know. Yeah, And I you know, and then
(22:23):
I work in after I've had thistime by myself and the sun comes up,
I do a meditation that takes memaybe twenty minutes at the most,
and boom, I'm ready to hitthe ground running. So yeah, i'd
say that rocking chair is my happyplace. Well, i've you know,
you when you've come to visit.We have a chair that I've noticed you've
(22:45):
sort of claimed in the mornings.It doesn't rock, but it does sort
of fulfill your purpose, I think, so it does. It does.
It's right by that outside window.Yes, you are an earlier, earlier,
riser than I even so I comeout and there you are in your
happy place exactly. Yeah. Sosomething simple, right, yeah, And
(23:06):
I think you know. The otherthing I want to say about happy places
is that you know when somebody's intheir happy place or has happy places because
they exude a sense of place themselves. Let me explain that a little bit.
There's this when you when one developsthese I'm going to use the word
(23:30):
little anchors of happiness in their life, places environments that they can be present
into invoke these feelings and these statesof being. When they do that,
they actually that's a way of creatinga presence on this planet, in this
time, in this body. Soyou are creating your own place in the
(23:52):
world. And I think we cansense that in another There are people that
you can tell have settled, youknow, are settled in themselves, and
there are people that I think arestruggling in some ways maybe and they don't
have that sense of place in theworld in the same way. Um.
And as a result, and Ithink we can feel that in those people.
(24:15):
You know, they're hard to connectwith or it's hard to sort of
pin them down to amusing air quotesor um to get a sense of them
in a in a real fundamental,profound way. So I think it's something
that we can also you know,it influences how we are with one another
too. M Yeah, and andit it really I think you're right when
(24:41):
you know, when I see somebodywho I who I know has a happy
place, they're they're less scattered,they're more grounded. Um. And I
would agree that, um, whoyou know, what what's the the old
phrase, Um, you know,the company that we keep is so important
and who we interact with is soimportant, and I think it's important to
(25:06):
choose that company wisely. And Ifeel like people can also be our happy
place. Um, you know whatI mean. I'm going to use you
as an example. Whether I'm doingthis podcast with you or on a golf
course with you. You know,it feels good, you know, I
feel like, Okay, I've chosena good friend to hang out with and
(25:27):
it's a good happy place for me. Yeah, that's that's very true.
And you know, I think bothof us are saying without saying it directly,
that you know, we're talking aboutnature, we're talking about these contextual
things around us, but what we'rereally saying is that these are as.
I think you use the word cuesto inspire a state of being internally,
(25:51):
so ultimately our happy places within us, and I think that bears mentioning.
There may be some situations and there'ssome individuels who can't for whatever reason get
out into nature and experience different things. But we all have minds and we
all have imaginations, and I thinkwe can create whatever we need in terms
(26:14):
of cues to bring a happy placeand create a happy place internally, you
know. And yeah, I justthink that's important to mention. Yeah,
and I'd like to mention one morething as well. I'd like to have
people consider the power of silence andpotentially incorporating silence into a happy place,
(26:40):
because I really feel you know,you and I have written about the healing
sounds of silence, I think iswhat we called it, and there is
a lot of research showing that silenceis very healing and it's also very grounding,
and it clears the clutter and itallows us to kind of tap into
those powers that we have within us. Um. So considering silence as as
(27:03):
a happy place, I know forme, UM, I really require it
at times and it really helps me. Um. It help helps me a
lot. So silence is something thatI would bring up. What do you
think, Les, Yeah, Ido. I think silence is an amazing
thing. It's actually full of it'sso rich. Silence is not empty at
(27:26):
all. Um m hmm. That'sa very good point. Yeah, and
you know the converse is true too. I often will listen to music with
like earbuds in so noise canceling earbuds, so all I hear is the music,
so I feel like I'm in themusic. That is just tremendous for
me as well. Gosh, there'sso many ways that we can find these
(27:52):
this this sense of happiness in ourplace, in the in our body,
in the world. And I dojust want to go back to that golf
course with you, Carolyn, becauseyes we are you. I just have
to give you a shout out here, which is that you definitely are a
happy place for me. I thinkthat being with people that you love and
(28:14):
respect and honor just automatically, asyou said, creates a happy creates a
happy place. And so yes,I just thank you for being here,
my good friend. Well, thankyou. Yes it is, it's been
It's been wonderful. And I thinkthe other thing when I look at the
friends that I'm close to and theones that I really enjoy hanging out with,
(28:37):
I almost feel like I become abetter person when I'm when I'm with
them and hanging with them. AndI feel that way about Les. I've
learned a lot from you over theyears, and and I feel like you
help me be the best that Ican be. And boy, what a
great thing for a friend to dofor another or one person to do for
another person. Well, it's atwo Way Street, and you know,
(28:57):
I think it's something I don't takegranted for one day, So that's very
true for me as well. Andyou know, I hope that people listening
as they're listening to you and Idiscuss our happy places, they're reflecting on
their own lives and thinking about wherethey find that sense of unbridled joy and
(29:18):
security and inspiration. And I hopethat each of our listeners really does have
a many happy places, and evenmore so, that they prioritize spending time
in those places. Because we gotthis life, so you know what,
we got to live it as wellas we can. Yeah, I agree,
(29:40):
I agree, And that wraps upthis wonderful episode of five to Thrive
Live once again. We'd like tothank our sponsors Guya Herbs, provider of
exceptional quality botanical products. Cognizance thatof Colline to help enhance memory, focus
and attention, Amuse a post bioticfor the immune system, Doctor Here's Probiotics
(30:00):
and award winning pre and poor backformulation and pro thrivers Wellness sleep created specifically
for thrivers. Thank you everyone.I hope you all experience joy, laughter,
love and happy places. It's timeto thrive. Everyone, have a
great night. This is good,good
Any health related information on the followingshow provides general information only. Content presented
on any show by any host orguests should not be substituted for a doctor's
advice. Always consult your physician beforebeginning any new diet, exercise, or
treatment program. Good Welcome to fiveto Thrive Live, a podcast about thriving
(00:43):
for those who have been affected bycancer and chronic disease. I'm doctor Lisa
Steeler and I'm here with my goodbuddy Carolyn Gazella. Hi. Carolyn,
Hey, Hi, how are youlease? I'm good. It's so nice
to be here with you down thisshow. Yes, I love it when
we do our shows together. AndI have to be honest. I mean,
you picked tonight's topic and it isbrilliant. I think it's going to
(01:08):
become one of my new favorite topics. Okay, well we shall see.
But before you get to that,if this is your first time with us,
you can find all of our pastshow podcasts on any major podcast outlook
out lit and you can also findour schedule on I thrive plan dot com.
And so, yeah, today we'regoing to be talking about happy places.
(01:30):
And I will just say at thispoint that finding your happy places and
spending time in your happy places canbe life changing. We're going to explain
more about that later, but Ido want to thank our sponsors who make
five to Thrive Live possible. First, we have Gaya Herbs, who for
more than thirty five years, hasbeen on a mission to connect people,
plants, and planet to create healingwith expensive experience manufacturing high quality botanical products.
(01:57):
Guya Herbs has products for healthcare consumersand a dedicated product line named Gaya
Pro, which is tailored to healthcarepractitioners. So practitioners can learn more at
Gaya herbspro dot com. Consumers canvisit Gaya erbs dot com. We also
thank Emuse, a unique patented postbioticthat gives your immune system a key advantage.
(02:21):
Amuse is an ingredient in many immunesupporting dietary supplements. You look for
Amuse on the label or you cango to imusehealth dot com. We also
thank cognisance aticoline, nature's way ofkeeping the brains energy producing centers firing on
all cylinders. So if you're lookingfor a way to enhance your brain function,
including your memory, focus, andattention, look for cognisant on the
(02:44):
label. Of your favorite brain healthproduct or go to Cognisant dot com for
more information. Doctor or Hires Probioticsis a best selling probiotic for over thirty
years. Contains twelve probiotic strains whichare shelf stable without refrigeration due to their
unk three year fermentation process, andyou can learn more at doctor or hero
probiotics dot com. And finally,pro Thrivers Sleep, a melatonin based sleep
(03:08):
formula specifically created for thrivers. ProthriversSleep is available through your healthcare provider or
online at Pure Formulas dot com.Okay, well, great job. Yeah
we've got some great sponsors. Yes, we do, so, Carolyn,
on this episode, when we sayhappy place, we are talking specifically about
(03:32):
what are we talking about actual placesor environments? That's I think what I
mean. But I want to sortof get your agreement on that, and
then if you agree, why isour environment so important? Okay? Well,
first of all, I personally lovecreating happy spaces. I love talking
about my happy space, but mostlyI love being in my happy spaces.
(03:55):
Hey, and you're right, weare talking about environments and and you know,
research really shows that our surroundings havea direct influence on our mental,
emotional, spiritual, and physical health. You know, for example, having
plants in our environment or even specialpaintings or pictures can have a calming effect.
(04:17):
And and as you mentioned, Lease, you and I love to talk
about the healing benefits of being outsidein nature. So our outside environment,
now, those natural environments have tonsof health benefits including you know, we
have less anxiety, less depression,and just better overall physical health. You
(04:39):
know, being out in nature,you know it might even help us live
longer. That's what the research tellsus. And now there's this new concept
that's emerged called nature deficit disorder,and that describes people who lack a connection
to nature, which can be harmfulto health. So at least today we're
(05:00):
talking about happy places and natural environments. So what makes these places happy?
Right? So, I think,first of all, in order to feel
happy in a place, one hasto be present, One has to be
aware of their place. So thevery first attribute that a happy place calls
(05:21):
forward is the attribute of presence.And it's when we take a moment to
be present, when we can absorband appreciate with gratitude the world around us.
We get a sense of awe anda sense of wonder and delight,
and that is all feel good stuff. Our endorphins. Are you going through
(05:45):
the roof, We've got oxytocin beingstimulated. These are all chemicals that are
secreted by are the very kind ofoldest part of our brain that's programmed literally
to respond to our environment. AndI think that you know put, So,
if we're seeking these kind of feelingsin our life, a sense of
gratitude, a sense of belonging,a sense of awe, a sense of
(06:09):
wonder, then the environment within whichwe are can actually facilitate that state of
being. So I really I thinkfor me, when I think about a
happy place, it's really both aplace, but it's also a presence,
our presence in that place, andtogether those things create this deep sense of
(06:32):
happiness. Not that fleeting sense ofhappiness, but a very deep, profound
sense of happiness. So, Carolyn, what is one of your happy places?
Well, this is an easy onefor me right away, because,
as you know, least, Ilike to combine nature with animals. So
(06:57):
my happiest place of all is theranch where I keep my horses, and
it becomes even happier when I canbring my dog Riley. So, you
know, you what you were justtalking about really resonated with me because I
think, I think you're right.It's a place, it's presence in that
place, but it's also how youfeel in that place, you know.
So something to keep in mind aboutour happy places is that it seems like
(07:23):
to me, my happy places engageall of my senses. You know,
I actually love the smell of thehorses the Hey, I even like the
smell of horsepoop. Please, thereyou have it. I just admitted it.
But you know what, I alsolove the sights and the sounds and
the feeling of brushing the horse,you know, the smell of the leather
(07:46):
saddle. You know, I'm moreengaged with my environment when I'm activating all
of these senses, and it becomesmore special to me. Um. You
know, it's almost like a movingmeditation because I'm so fully engaged and not
distracted and being fully present. Likeyou mentioned, that's what makes my special
(08:11):
places special, and that's that's reallywhat creates. I mean, when I
combine nature and animals, I amthe happiest that I that I am,
and I'm I'm calm, I'm relaxedand I'm grounded, and um, these
are the things that I'm looking forwhen I create my happy places. So
(08:33):
so at least, what are what'sone of your happy places? Yeah?
And I have to say before Ishare that I've seen you in your happy
place and it's a beautiful thing.So all of what you said is very
true. In fact, my littlepicture of you that comes up on this
skype calls you on the ranch withyour horses. Yeah. So um yeah.
(08:56):
For me, gosh, I've somany happy places it's hard to even
begin. But I think the oneI'm going to talk about is the one
that I am fortunate enough to experienceon a daily basis, and that's my
backyard. So I live in inthe Tucson Desert, which is a very
lush desert actually, so there's lotsof trees, lots of plants, and
(09:20):
my back patio area is raised abovea wash, which is basically a dried
up river bed or arroyo, andso I have that in this big expanse
of natural vegetation off to one side, and then I have a mountain range
on the other side, and treesare in and amongst that, and so
I go out there every morning todo my meditation, and it's just such
(09:43):
a beautiful, calming, exciting,exhilarating place. There's certain birds I know,
and I look for them on theircertain cacti, and you know,
I feel the breeze sort of gentlytussles my against my skin, and it's
just all of it just to meis so I just feels so good.
(10:07):
I don't know how to describe it. It's like a it's like a feeling
of like when you settle into achair that's just right and like, ah,
you can just kind of relax,but you're not like falling asleep relaxed.
You're relaxed in this kind of excitedstate of Oh my gosh, the
world is so incredible. So that'sone of my happy places. Well,
(10:28):
you know, I've been to thathappy place and it's beautiful. And it's
interesting because I have the same feelingwhen I sit out in your backyard and
yeah, it's it's it's beautiful.Yeah. So you know, nature obviously
is really healing, and I thinkthat's pretty much true across the board for
most people. So you know,there's scientific reasons for this that we could
(10:50):
discuss, but let's put the scienceaside. For a moment, just why
do you think nature is so profoundlyhealing? Really? You want me to
put the side it's aside. Gosh, I love reading I love reading the
research on nature just because it's soaffirming. But okay, let's put that
aside. And you know, Ithink nature is so profoundly healing for several
(11:13):
reasons. Like we both have mentioned, nature helps us be fully present.
And anytime we can be fully presentis a good thing. When we're having
a conversation with a friend, afamily member, whatever, being present is
a very good thing. But forme, it goes beyond that. Nature
(11:35):
becomes a spiritual experience. And thereason it's spiritual to me is because it
does it's infused with gratitude. Youknow, you were talking about awe,
and every time I'm in nature,I am in awe of the splendor,
the beauty, the activity. Youknow, you mentioned birds. I too,
(11:58):
am a bird person, and herein New Mexico we have amazing birds
and they're very active and engaging,and all of that comes from nature.
And to me that that's almost likea spiritual experience. Um. You know,
I think anytime we can tap intogratitude and appreciation. Um, that's
(12:20):
that's going to have health benefits.We know, I mean, I know
I'm not supposed to talk about thereason, but we know that appreciation and
gratitude is very very healing. Ithas many health benefits. And I feel
that gratitude is is really the foundationof my spiritual practice on a daily basis.
(12:41):
So, UM, I think thatwhen we can shift our perspective into
that positive feeling of awe and youknow, inspiration. Um, I think
that's what nature does for us.UM. And I think these that shifting
of person perspective kind of helps makeour happy places happy. So, so
(13:05):
how do you feel about that?Would you agree with that? I mean,
there's so many ways in which thatshows up. I think we've all
had the experience of wrestling with aproblem, for example, and then we
just go out and take a walk, maybe even not the same day,
and boom, the solution pops intoour mind. Or we're having difficult exchange
with somebody, and then we moveourselves out of that environment into nature and
(13:31):
get a sense of peace with that. And I think that's about perspective.
I think somebody wants to join theconversation. Yeah, So I just let
that let that little being out.So I think another aspect of perspective though,
or yeah, shifting in perspective isis the actual nature that we're in.
(13:54):
So, for example, if ifI'm in a place where there are
some really big trees, I mightlook up up the tree and just looking
at how big the tree is andhow far up into the sky it reaches
and how strong the bark is,it just makes me feel different in my
life, and it reminds me ofattributes like solidity and groundedness and extension and
(14:20):
reaching and you know things that arejust maybe I'm not verbalizing all those words
in my head, but I'm internalizingthose and I bring those new perspectives back
into the rest of my day orinto the next moment, and there's okay,
so I'm going to go into researchtoo, but we can't help ourselves.
(14:41):
There is some research on this too. You know. There's been some
studies that have shown that kids thatgrow up with green vistas, so that
they have the ability to look outand see kind of a horizon line,
they actually have higher levels of cognitivefunction, so that their brain is literally
programmed to see the world of possibilitydifferently. So they problem solve differently,
(15:03):
and I think that if so thatyou know that, and that makes sense.
It's just sort of logical. Soif we give ourselves the opportunity to
be in different environments, to payattention to the environment that we're in,
we will change the way our brainfunctions. We don't even have to name
it, or we don't have totry to figure it out. All we
(15:26):
have to do is just experience it, which is the other beautiful thing that's
such a good point. And themore we experience it, the more it
becomes second nature. You know.It's interesting because you're talking about shifting perspective
and one thing that occurs to me, and it popped into my head when
you were talking about looking at thetree, because this is what happens when
I see the mountains. So herein Santa Fe, New Mexico, we're
(15:48):
surrounded by beautiful mountain escapes, andevery time, every time I see a
glimpse of the mountain, it causesme to pause, slow down, and
again have this gratitude like, wow, how beautiful is that mountain? And
it's so grand and so I evenjust the pausing and the slowing down,
(16:14):
and then the mountain as a cuefor gratitude. I gotta tell you,
at least I see those mountains allthe time. That's a lot of cues
for gratitude. Yeah, and that'sactually a known practice in positive psychology called
savoring and pairing. So you know, it's it's it basically goes like this,
Like, for you, you lookat those mountains, So you one
(16:37):
would start with this practice as kindof a conscious effort. So you look
at the mountains, you recognize thefeeling that it inspires and new. So
let's say I look at the mountainand I think that just inspires a sense
of solidity, comfort, and maybesecurity. I'm just kind of making this
up as I go, right,So then I really internalize that, and
(17:00):
I just keep looking at the mountainsand repeat those attributes to myself about ten
times in a row. And thenthe next day I look at the mountains
again, I do the same exerciseand repeat those attributes about ten times in
a row. And I do thatfor five to ten days in a row.
And I'm what I'm doing now isI'm actually rewiring my brain. So
my brain is literally starting to createnew neuronal connections that are associating that mountain
(17:26):
with those attributes that I gave it, security, comfort, etc. And
then from then on, once Iget that wiring in place, if I'm
nowhere near those mountains, I'm ina stressful, scary situation, I close
my eyes for a second, Iimagine the mountains. Immediately my brain will
bring up the associated feelings of security, comfort, etc. So it's a
(17:51):
fabulous way to give yourself a toolthat you can take with you wherever you
are, so you can basically internalizeyour happy places and the associated motions absolutely,
And it reminds me of the workof BJ Fogg when he talks about
changing behaviors, and so he talksabout a queue, like you have a
queue and then you do the behavioryou want at that queue. So like,
(18:14):
let's say I'm trying to have moregratitude in my life, my mountains
are the queue I give myself gratitudemessages, etc. Etc. And I
think what you're also talking about ishow we can use the power of visualization.
And what I hear you saying isthis doesn't have to be some long
drawn out visualization practice. You're justpopping that that image into your mind during
(18:38):
your stressful event, possibly taking acouple of few deep breaths, and all
of a sudden, you're happy.Places now helped you deal with that stressful
event right exactly, And it canbe very instantaneous. I remember teaching this
practice to a patient, and thenext time I saw the patient, she
said, you know, I justhave to tell you that I did that.
(19:00):
I found a place that really gaveme, you know, feelings of
serenity and got it kind of wiredinto my brain. And I found myself
in a very difficult conversation with myboss and I was getting really upset.
So I just took a moment,I imagined my place, and I immediately
felt more serene, and it completelychanged the dynamic of my conversation with my
(19:22):
boss. And I mean that wasyou know, it's a small little example,
but that is profound. Imagine ifwe can do that kind of in
and out, weave it in andout of our day, we can create
a day that's a very different kindof experience than we would otherwise have had.
I mean, if she didn't dothat, she would have been upset.
She would have come home upset,she would have you know, perseverated
(19:45):
on the conversation. She would havehad to figure out how to you know,
make it right the next day.I mean, you know, it
really can change her life in verysmall but profound ways. Yeah, I
mean this makes our happy place atool that we can use to to navigate
life. Um So, so what'sanother happy place for you? Lease?
You must have? We don't havea long enough show to discuss your so
(20:10):
many, so many, but I'mgonna go. I'm gonna I'm gonna surprise
you at this one because I recentlyexperienced this. So I was I have
a convertible car, and that convertiblewith the top down is definitely a happy
place for me. So I wasdriving my convertible. The weather was perfect,
like beautiful temperature, it was kindof the sun was setting, so
(20:33):
the sky was spectacular, which Icould see everywhere. Because my convertible top
was down, I had some ofmy very favorite music playing rather loudly,
so I was kind of enveloped inthis wonderful sound. I was definitely in
my happy place in that moment.For sure. It's funny because I know
(20:53):
you're a car girl, and Icould I have ridden with you in a
convertible, so I can totally seethat that would be a very happy place.
And another thing I like about yourhappy place is that it's it's very
simple, you know, it's it'snothing complex, you know. Yeah,
(21:15):
I definitely can see that that wouldbe a happy place for you. Were
you not surprised even a little?A little yeah, a little? Okay?
All right, well, okay,right back at you. So what's
another happy place for you? Youknow, this one's gonna surprise you?
Maybe I don't know. Well,you know, we've we've we've been friends
for thirty years, so there's probablyaren't a lot of surprises. Okay,
So you know I was talking about, you know, our happy place can
(21:38):
be simple, and it doesn't necessarilyneed to be outdoors. So for me,
one of my happy places is sittingon my rocking chair in the dark,
waiting for the sun to rise inthe morning. Sometimes I'm gonna have
classical music playing softly in the background, and sometimes I'm just gonna sit there
(22:00):
in silence, rocking in my rockingchair. When when it's chilly, I'm
going to turn on the fireplace,which is right next to my rocking chair.
And I have to tell you,it's a great way to start my
day. It's very grounding. Butit's also very simple. But it makes
me happy, you know. Yeah, And I you know, and then
(22:23):
I work in after I've had thistime by myself and the sun comes up,
I do a meditation that takes memaybe twenty minutes at the most,
and boom, I'm ready to hitthe ground running. So yeah, i'd
say that rocking chair is my happyplace. Well, i've you know,
you when you've come to visit.We have a chair that I've noticed you've
(22:45):
sort of claimed in the mornings.It doesn't rock, but it does sort
of fulfill your purpose, I think, so it does. It does.
It's right by that outside window.Yes, you are an earlier, earlier,
riser than I even so I comeout and there you are in your
happy place exactly. Yeah. Sosomething simple, right, yeah, And
(23:06):
I think you know. The otherthing I want to say about happy places
is that you know when somebody's intheir happy place or has happy places because
they exude a sense of place themselves. Let me explain that a little bit.
There's this when you when one developsthese I'm going to use the word
(23:30):
little anchors of happiness in their life, places environments that they can be present
into invoke these feelings and these statesof being. When they do that,
they actually that's a way of creatinga presence on this planet, in this
time, in this body. Soyou are creating your own place in the
(23:52):
world. And I think we cansense that in another There are people that
you can tell have settled, youknow, are settled in themselves, and
there are people that I think arestruggling in some ways maybe and they don't
have that sense of place in theworld in the same way. Um.
And as a result, and Ithink we can feel that in those people.
(24:15):
You know, they're hard to connectwith or it's hard to sort of
pin them down to amusing air quotesor um to get a sense of them
in a in a real fundamental,profound way. So I think it's something
that we can also you know,it influences how we are with one another
too. M Yeah, and andit it really I think you're right when
(24:41):
you know, when I see somebodywho I who I know has a happy
place, they're they're less scattered,they're more grounded. Um. And I
would agree that, um, whoyou know, what what's the the old
phrase, Um, you know,the company that we keep is so important
and who we interact with is soimportant, and I think it's important to
(25:06):
choose that company wisely. And Ifeel like people can also be our happy
place. Um, you know whatI mean. I'm going to use you
as an example. Whether I'm doingthis podcast with you or on a golf
course with you. You know,it feels good, you know, I
feel like, Okay, I've chosena good friend to hang out with and
(25:27):
it's a good happy place for me. Yeah, that's that's very true.
And you know, I think bothof us are saying without saying it directly,
that you know, we're talking aboutnature, we're talking about these contextual
things around us, but what we'rereally saying is that these are as.
I think you use the word cuesto inspire a state of being internally,
(25:51):
so ultimately our happy places within us, and I think that bears mentioning.
There may be some situations and there'ssome individuels who can't for whatever reason get
out into nature and experience different things. But we all have minds and we
all have imaginations, and I thinkwe can create whatever we need in terms
(26:14):
of cues to bring a happy placeand create a happy place internally, you
know. And yeah, I justthink that's important to mention. Yeah,
and I'd like to mention one morething as well. I'd like to have
people consider the power of silence andpotentially incorporating silence into a happy place,
(26:40):
because I really feel you know,you and I have written about the healing
sounds of silence, I think iswhat we called it, and there is
a lot of research showing that silenceis very healing and it's also very grounding,
and it clears the clutter and itallows us to kind of tap into
those powers that we have within us. Um. So considering silence as as
(27:03):
a happy place, I know forme, UM, I really require it
at times and it really helps me. Um. It help helps me a
lot. So silence is something thatI would bring up. What do you
think, Les, Yeah, Ido. I think silence is an amazing
thing. It's actually full of it'sso rich. Silence is not empty at
(27:26):
all. Um m hmm. That'sa very good point. Yeah, and
you know the converse is true too. I often will listen to music with
like earbuds in so noise canceling earbuds, so all I hear is the music,
so I feel like I'm in themusic. That is just tremendous for
me as well. Gosh, there'sso many ways that we can find these
(27:52):
this this sense of happiness in ourplace, in the in our body,
in the world. And I dojust want to go back to that golf
course with you, Carolyn, becauseyes we are you. I just have
to give you a shout out here, which is that you definitely are a
happy place for me. I thinkthat being with people that you love and
(28:14):
respect and honor just automatically, asyou said, creates a happy creates a
happy place. And so yes,I just thank you for being here,
my good friend. Well, thankyou. Yes it is, it's been
It's been wonderful. And I thinkthe other thing when I look at the
friends that I'm close to and theones that I really enjoy hanging out with,
(28:37):
I almost feel like I become abetter person when I'm when I'm with
them and hanging with them. AndI feel that way about Les. I've
learned a lot from you over theyears, and and I feel like you
help me be the best that Ican be. And boy, what a
great thing for a friend to dofor another or one person to do for
another person. Well, it's atwo Way Street, and you know,
(28:57):
I think it's something I don't takegranted for one day, So that's very
true for me as well. Andyou know, I hope that people listening
as they're listening to you and Idiscuss our happy places, they're reflecting on
their own lives and thinking about wherethey find that sense of unbridled joy and
(29:18):
security and inspiration. And I hopethat each of our listeners really does have
a many happy places, and evenmore so, that they prioritize spending time
in those places. Because we gotthis life, so you know what,
we got to live it as wellas we can. Yeah, I agree,
(29:40):
I agree, And that wraps upthis wonderful episode of five to Thrive
Live once again. We'd like tothank our sponsors Guya Herbs, provider of
exceptional quality botanical products. Cognizance thatof Colline to help enhance memory, focus
and attention, Amuse a post bioticfor the immune system, Doctor Here's Probiotics
(30:00):
and award winning pre and poor backformulation and pro thrivers Wellness sleep created specifically
for thrivers. Thank you everyone.I hope you all experience joy, laughter,
love and happy places. It's timeto thrive. Everyone, have a
great night. This is good,good
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Special Summer Offer: Exclusively on Apple Podcasts, try our Dateline Premium subscription completely free for one month! With Dateline Premium, you get every episode ad-free plus exclusive bonus content.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
I’m Jay Shetty host of On Purpose the worlds #1 Mental Health podcast and I’m so grateful you found us. I started this podcast 5 years ago to invite you into conversations and workshops that are designed to help make you happier, healthier and more healed. I believe that when you (yes you) feel seen, heard and understood you’re able to deal with relationship struggles, work challenges and life’s ups and downs with more ease and grace. I interview experts, celebrities, thought leaders and athletes so that we can grow our mindset, build better habits and uncover a side of them we’ve never seen before. New episodes every Monday and Friday. Your support means the world to me and I don’t take it for granted — click the follow button and leave a review to help us spread the love with On Purpose. I can’t wait for you to listen to your first or 500th episode!