June 26, 2025 • 42 mins
Jenna is SOLO talking about Summertime, Trusting the Unknown and Your Hearts Desires! She talks about Ex stalker vibes!
Love Your Body, Love Your Life is broadcast live Thursdays at 4PM ET and Music on W4HC Radio – Health Café Live (www.w4hc.com) part of Talk 4 Radio (www.talk4radio.com) on the Talk 4 Media Network (www.talk4media.com).
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Love Your Body, Love Your Life is broadcast live Thursdays at 4PM ET and Music on W4HC Radio – Health Café Live (www.w4hc.com) part of Talk 4 Radio (www.talk4radio.com) on the Talk 4 Media Network (www.talk4media.com).
Love Your Body, Love Your Life TV Show is viewed on Talk 4 TV (www.talk4tv.com). Love Your Body, Love Your Life Podcast is also available on Talk 4 Media (www.talk4media.com), Talk 4 Podcasting (www.talk4podcasting.com), iHeartRadio, Amazon Music, Pandora, Spotify, Audible, and over 100 other podcast outlets
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Any health related information on the following show provides general
information only. Content presented on any show by any host
or guests should not be substituted for a doctor's advice.
Always consult your physician before beginning any new diet, exercise,
or treatment program.
Speaker 2 (00:25):
Hello, welcome to Love Your Body, Love Your Life. My
name is Jenna. I'm the host of the podcast. I'm
also the author of the book titled Love Your Body,
Love Your Life, Fifty two Tips that will Radically change
your health. You can find my book on Amazon and
on Barnes Andnoble dot com. And I am just going
(00:46):
to preface the show that if you're watching this live,
I really apologize for the delay in the video. I
have not been live you guys in like I don't know,
two three weeks or something because of this reason. And
I literally just got my modem, my brand new modem,
sent to me like ten minutes before going live today.
(01:08):
So if for whatever reason, I freeze, we're probably just
going to cut the show. But if it just continues
on with this little delay, then please just continue to
listen on audio because I will continue to talk, although
you won't be able to see me. So with that
all said, welcome to the show, you guys. I'm happy
(01:32):
to be back live. I do love doing the show live.
It's just this little technical issue that I have to
get over. And this kind of podcast is a little
bit different because it's live and it's not pre recorded,
so we can't just pre record this and then edit
it or anything like that. So it's a little bit
different of a platform. I guess, which I love. You know,
(01:56):
gives me the what do I want to say? Like,
I'm always very on my toes to do the show
live because there is no editing here. So yeah, So
today's topic is just a summertime catch up with me.
(02:16):
I've been doing the show a solo a boy myself
more than ever this year since I started the podcast
back in twenty nineteen, I've been doing more solo episodes.
So it's a summertime catchup. And also I want to
get into the topic of trusting the unknown, and today
I'm going to open up and be a little bit
(02:39):
more vulnerable than I've ever been on the show and
just going to talk a little bit more about my
personal life in terms of that topic of trusting the unknown.
So we'll get into that in a bit but in
terms of summertime so far, it's been. It's it's been interesting,
(03:01):
it's been it's been fun, and it's been i'd say
what I want to say, Well, I feel like we
really do have the power to create our own reality
and our own destiny. Right, So what I have decided
to do is to place myself back into the music
(03:24):
studio and record another original song and one more cover song,
which I'm super duper excited about. I'm calling it my
little summer project, and I'm just happy about it. You guys,
I love singing and I love recording music. I mean,
(03:46):
I love singing. In my house, I have I have
a microphone, I have a little like setup, I have
a piano, I have some guitars. I have my own
little like music room that I can just sing my
heart out in. So it's definitely different when I'm in
the music studio and I'm actually working on a project.
(04:06):
But I feel like it, you know, makes me a
a better singer and a better artist in general, because
I have to really be present with the piece of
art that I am creating. The piece that comes really
simple to me is the writing of the lyrics. So
(04:28):
I definitely would consider myself a poet lash lyricist. That
piece actually comes really easy to me. I'm definitely a writer.
I just announced I'm an author of a book, and
I just feel like I can get lost in journaling
my feelings and I'm actually better at, I feel expressing
(04:52):
my feelings in written form because well, number one, because
I feel like nobody is going to read it and
I can just say whatever I want. And number two
because I feel like I can just use my imagination
and just go wherever I want to go and just
(05:12):
create this song, I guess, or this poem, and I
kind of know what I'm talking about, and the reader
will just interpret it however they want to read it,
however they want to interpret it, or the person that
is listening to my song. So that's kind of a
little update for me my little summer project. I've been
(05:35):
doing a lot more coaching with women. I've announced on
the show that I am definitely pivoting this year into
more of women's coaching. It's basically a therapy session with
energy work, is the best way that I can describe
it in Layman's terms. And the theme I guess that's
(05:58):
been coming up with women is a lot of inner
child healing, which doesn't surprise me because that was kind
of my big epiphany. When I healed my inner child,
I actually started writing more and poems started to just
kind of fall out of me more, and I found
(06:20):
more of my true authentic voice. So it doesn't surprise
me that I'm attracting women that need inner child healing,
that have family dynamics that have been hard, and they
want a different perspective on the family dynamics. And that's
kind of one of my genius points if I can
(06:41):
be honest, is hearing somebody and knowing where they're trauma
lies and why it lies there, and how I can
give them a totally different perspective on their own trauma
and their own situations so they're not in victimhood, Okay,
(07:02):
because when we're caught in victimhood with our trauma, then
we can't create. I just said, you know, when I
started the show, I do feel like we are definitely
the creators of our own life, and when we're stuck
in victimhood and trauma, we are not allowed to have
that creativity flow through our body and our mind and
(07:25):
be present to what wants to rise. Like kind of
like our intuition or our wisdom wants to rise and
we can't catch it if we're still caught in fight
or flight, or our cortisol is high, or are we're
stuck in anger or jealousy or emotions that just don't
(07:47):
serve us. You know, they're heavier density emotions that actually
can ground us if we work with the energies correctly,
they can actually ground us into being more of who
we are. And that's one of the things that I
work with my clients on is just taking those dense density,
(08:10):
those higher density energies of the negativity, the sadness, the anger,
the jealousies, the all the heavy emotions that we don't
want to feel. We have to feel them, you guys,
and it helps us ground into more of the truth
of who we are. So yeah, so that's a little
bit of an update with my coaching. And thank you
(08:34):
for the questions. I you know, I definitely encourage questions.
At any point, I will stop and answer questions. So
we did have one question come in Hadley asks how
do we remain in control? Okay, So I feel like
(08:56):
your question, Hadley, I mean it's really broad because as
I don't have context around what you mean by in control.
But as far as you're emotional, like if you're you're
coming up against like outbursts that you don't like in yourself,
or like anger outbursts, or like you don't want to
(09:19):
say something that you don't mean. I would say the
easiest way to remain in control is, first of all,
you have to learn how to remain in your body.
So I'll say that again. We have to Oh okay,
so Hadley is now saying, how do we remain in
control of our life is going when so much happens
(09:42):
beyond our control? Okay, Yeah, let's let's talk about that,
because you are one hundred percent absolutely right that we
are not in control of our external world. Our external world,
we have zero control over any somebody else. We have
zero control over the world and what's happening. We have
(10:05):
zero control over people in our household. We have zero
control over traumas, over people that are meant to leave
our lives, people that suddenly pass away, whatever the case is.
You're one hundred percent right, we have no control over that.
The only thing that we do have control over, Hasley,
(10:28):
is our inner world, our inner dialogue, our inner most
preciousness of ourselves. And this is the exact work that
I teach. It's getting to know yourself on that deep
level and anchoring into more. And I hesitate to use
(10:50):
this word, but it's the truth. It's learning how to
anchor more into your soulful self. The soul knows the
truth truth. The soul is unaffected by external world. There
is a softness and a groundedness and a silence and
(11:12):
a centeredness to the inner being of who you are,
which is your soul. And when you're connected to that
inner being and you're well versed with her or him,
and you're well connected and you have a relationship with
that inner being of yourself, you can remain in control,
(11:33):
in centeredness I feel is the right word, and breathe
with that entity of that of who you are. It's
just it's almost a godlike presence because that's the truth
of who we are. We really are a collective of
the universe. We're breath. We came in, we picked a body,
(11:57):
and we really are breath. We really are. And when
we're done, when we're we've lived our lives and our
soul is ready to go beyond and do something else.
You know, we pass and I know that's deep. It
got deep. But that's the truth of how I want
to answer that question. It's getting to know that that
(12:19):
soulful self and that part of you that really is
centered and grounded and like I said, very anchored in
that truth. And that takes work. It takes a lot
of work. And I'm not saying that when you do
this work you won't be triggered, because you will. You
definitely will. You will come off of the channel, which
(12:41):
is your central channel, your the core of who you are,
your body, your breath. You will come off that several times,
but you will know and you will have the tools
to get back in your centered, groundedness and feel in
control of your body and your mind and your thoughts
and the way you create your life. So I will
get off the soapbox. I hope that answers your question. Hadley.
(13:04):
Thank you so much for the for the question. But
I will just say, you know, just start with breathwork.
It really does. It really anchors you, it really centers you.
Start with meditation, start with getting silent, you know, groundedness.
Journaling helps. Again, you can go to my website at
(13:24):
Genolobos dot com. I have journaling prompts for free on
my website. If you guys want to check that out,
you can also you know, contact me and we can
have a call and go further on that and I
can help you personally. Okay, So Lance asked, how can
we realize when? How can we realize we are off course?
(13:46):
And how can we get back on track? If you're
asking this question, Lance, I feel like you know, you
know in your gut when you're off track. You can
feel it in your gut, you can feel it in
your body. You have anxiety, you have headaches, you have
stomach aches. Your body really communicates with you, guys, all
the time, and how you get back on track is
(14:12):
different for everybody, you know. Hardly asked, I feel a
deeper question. I don't really have again the context, Lance,
but maybe just you know, meditate on your ideas, write
them down, work with a coach, you know, talk to somebody.
I don't know how you feel like you want to
get back on track? Is this about a job? Is
(14:35):
it about you know, something else? But if you're asking
this question, I feel like you do know that you're
off track and you need to pivot and get back
onto something that just feels good. You know, whatever makes
you feel good, just follow that north Star. So yeah,
I love the questions, you guys, keep them coming. I'm
(14:57):
sorry for the delay if you're watching the video, but
hopefully you are listening to the audio and you're getting
something from this. I'm going to take a drink of water,
give me quick second. I want to keep myself hydrated. Here.
This is warm lemon and water. So good. So yeah,
(15:17):
I love the questions. So let's get back on to
Let's see I talked about my coaching. Yeah, so summer's
going well so far. I know it just started, but
there are just a couple of things that I wanted
to catch you up on. And I feel like the
topic of trusting the unknown will help had Lee and
(15:41):
Lance with their questions too. So I'm going to get
into that topic now, which is trusting the unknown, and
I'm going to share a personal story and it's going
to relate to this topic. So so okay, So six
(16:03):
years ago, you guys, I left a very significant relationship,
romantic relationship. I was with this person for fourteen years
and I was completely in love with this person and
for reasons that I will have discernment on. I won't
(16:26):
disclose the reasons why I had to leave the relationship,
but I knew, just like how Lance asked, how do
you know when you're off course? I knew I was
off course with this relationship, and as much as it
hurt me, I needed to leave the relationship. So I did.
(16:47):
And this was six years ago. And throughout the six years,
this person, this particular person, came back in my life
has been actually weaving in and out of my life.
Even though I went on and I dated other people,
this person weaved in out of my life. And about
(17:12):
a year ago, I tried to rekindle this relation, this
relationship with this certain person, and he wasn't honest. I
felt was still playing games, and he was taking you know,
my care and my love for him still for granted,
(17:34):
and I feel like he was acting out of emotions
that he needs to take care of, right And so
I tried a year ago, and I knew that that
wasn't going to work, so I let it go. And
then he continued to kind of weave in and out
(17:55):
of my life. And I will take responsibility for allowing
him to weave in and out of my life life,
right Like I I didn't like shut it off completely.
I think that I was still just maybe hopeful or
still just didn't want to cut the tie, you know.
So recently, very recently, I put down and so I
(18:17):
will say that I felt also that maybe we could
be friends quote unquote, Okay, but very recently I just
realized that it's just not going to work. Like it's
the friendship hope, the hope of the friendship is just
not it's not there right now, Okay. So I put
(18:37):
down a very like a boundary that I haven't done
in the whole six years, and which is like I
just haven't responded. And so now I've set that, I've
I've done this boundary that I have not done before
in the six years. And I feel like since then
(19:00):
there's been some kind of like cuckoo behavior from this person.
So and I will give you context around that. So
yesterday I am I am in a local like shopping
like strip mall or whatever. There is a nail place
(19:20):
in there, there's a hair place in there, there's a
yoga studio in there in this strip mall, and I'm
in there because I had some errants to do. And
one of the errands was I was gonna go get
my water, my my distilled water filled up. I get
these like glass jars and I get this this water
(19:41):
filled up at this juice bar. And I'm in the
juice bar with all my bottles of water. And they're heavy, right,
They're like glass and they're heavy when the water is
filled up. So I'm in the juice bar, I'm the
only one in there. It's getting ready for closing around
five point thirty ish six o'clock. And I'm normally, you guys,
(20:02):
like really hyper vigilant when I'm out and about in
the world. And you know, talking about inner child healing.
That's definitely from my childhood, right, I'm like always watching
my back. I'm like, I'm hyper vigilant. I just am.
I'm just naturally always like watching out to see who's
behind me, who's like It's just it's just a natural
(20:22):
thing that I do, always watching my back, no matter
if I'm with somebody or not. I'm just really aware
of my surrounding. So I'm in the juice bar, I'm
getting my water, and I noticed from the corner of
my eye that this person is across the like way
of the parking lot in his car, no, And I
knew right away that he had seen my car in
(20:46):
the parking lot, okay, And I was like, oh my goodness,
he noticed my car. And now he's going to hang
out and wait until I go to my car, and
then he's gonna either come up to me or you know,
obviously drive up to my car or whatever. And mind you,
I'm trying not to have any communication with him. There's
nothing else to talk about, right, I've set my piece.
(21:09):
I feel like there's you know, care there in this relationship.
But it's like I need to move on, Like we
need to like really allow each other to move on
and heal our hearts. Like let's do this, you know.
So anyways, and I'll get to your questions, you guys,
I promise. So let me just finish my story and
then you know, I'll get to your questions. So anyway,
(21:32):
So I leave the juice bar with my waters and
I'm I'm already like anxious inside because I'm like, Okay,
what the f am I going to do? Right, I'm
I have to leave the parking lot. I don't want
to run into him, So what am I going to do?
So get in my car, put my waters in my car,
get in my car, and I'm looking at the rear
view mirror and he's literally he because he had parked
(21:54):
his car and was waiting for me to leave the
juice bar. And now oh, he sees me in his
car in my car, so he's obviously he turned on
his car getting ready to drive. So I'm looking at
him from the rear view mirror and I can see
he's just literally idle there waiting for me to pull out.
So I to go home, which he knows where I live. Okay,
(22:18):
So to go home, I would have backed up my
car and made a left, and he would have literally
come right there. His plan was just to come right
there and just see me. And so what I did,
and I was laughing, obviously, I was giggling to myself.
I yeah, I know it is stalker behavior. So so
(22:40):
I literally what I did was I backed up my car.
Instead of going left, I went right, And like I
have to giggle, you guys, because I'm like inside, I'm like,
you know, my like I had anxiety, like you know,
that feeling like the fight or flight. It came back,
so I'm like have anxiety. I'm like, okay, I'm going
(23:02):
to make a right to throw him off. So I
made a right, and I'm going around like this other
back like way. I still have to go out a
certain way right, so I still have to drive back
by his car. But I needed to throw him off
a little bit. So I went and I parked like
in this corner area for a little bit, and I thought, okay,
(23:22):
what am I gonna do? What am I gonna do?
So I put my head my head set on like
I was on the phone, my iPods or whatever, like
I was gonna pretend I was on the phone. So
I did, and I have my son glasses on, and
I just thought, okay, I got to get home. And
I drove and he was waiting there like in his car,
(23:44):
and I just drove. I didn't look. I had my
glasses on. I just didn't even look to the left
where he was. I drove straight, and you know, obviously
made it out of the parking lot. I make a
left to go on the main street to go home,
and I mean behavior, you guys, I mean, come on,
he booked it, made a U turn, went on the
(24:06):
other side of the like the street in order for
me to kind of see him as I'm going straight
to go home, and he's kind of coming this way.
I mean, like, what is that? Right? Like, okay, so
my point, right, what is my point in all of this? Well,
I have two. One is I won't will never understand
(24:30):
really why men can behave a certain way in the
relationship when you're in a relationship with a man who
knows they have a good thing in front of them,
or vice versa. I mean, I'm sure women do this
same behavior too, but obviously I'm a female, so I
need to talk from my perspective. I will never understand
(24:54):
why a man sees what they have in front of
him and can act a certain way when they're in
the relationship, Meaning they can disrespect you, they can treat
you with bad behavior, they can act cocky, and then
when you are fed up with it, they can say
(25:14):
I'm sorry, blah blah blah, whatever it is. That's my
first point. I will never understand this. And mind you, guys,
this is six years later, six years later after the
relationship ended. I can see this behavior happening when we
first ended it, or when I first ended it. I
kind of see this kind of behavior then, but he
(25:38):
actually went the opposite way. He if I got into that.
You guys would be like floored, okay about what he
did when we first ended the relationship. Obviously, I went
through the grief, all the grief emotions. I was sad,
I was angry, I was devastated. I went through all
those emotions in the beginning. Thank God, because now six
(26:01):
years later, I feel stronger. You know, this last boundary
was kind of like my last straw, I guess, and
I will definitely attribute that to my healing more my
healing work on my own self, you know, like what
I do for my own healing, my inner child, healing
(26:22):
my trauma. I will attribute that last boundary to that.
So anyways, my point is, you guys, I don't get
that as far as men are concerned, why they can
act one way and then come back and just apologize
and expect for the women to be like, oh, okay,
well okay, we'll just you know, we'll just pat you
(26:43):
on the back. Don't do that again. Okay, It's fine, Oh,
I you know, I'll just I'll accept the bad behavior,
Like what the f like? Really they expect for us
to just be like excusing that, and just like I
don't get it, Like I don't know, like they just
feel like our hearts are just this thing that they
(27:04):
can crush, Like no, thank you, Okay, anyways, I'll get
off of that. The other thing that I really want
to talk about, though, is trusting the unknown, because if
I'm honest, I get scared. I get scared I'm not
going to meet anybody like we had that connection. I
get scared that I might not meet somebody that I
(27:26):
feel at home with. I get scared that I'm just
not gonna ever have this kind of love, this love
that I had for this person in my life. And
what's interesting, and I feel like we get tested a
lot is yesterday, while I was out doing all these errands,
I was getting really nostalgic and I was sad, and
(27:49):
I was like, where are these feelings coming from? Like
I haven't felt like this in a long time. And
when I'm sad, I allow myself to be sad. I cry,
I'm in the carbo my So I just let it.
I let it come down, because if I don't, then
it'll just fester and it's worse. So I get sad.
You guys, I get scared. I get all these things.
(28:12):
But at the end of the day. What I want
to say is that I am more in trust of
the unknown that I've ever been because here is what
I know for sure. And this is what I want
to encourage you guys to do. If you're in a relationship,
or if you're in a job, or if you're in
just a situation where the unknown is needed, but you
(28:36):
know that the unknown is more truthful to you and
your heart, then the familiar is like a familiar relationship
or a familiar job, or just a familiarity of where
you know in your heart and gut it doesn't feel
right anymore, and the unknown is more truthful. It's scarier,
(29:00):
but it's the truth. Then I wholeheartedly encourage you to
trust that truth, because here's what happens when we are
in something that is not our truth. Our body is there,
but our mind is not. So I'll give you an example.
If I were to go back to this familiarity in
(29:24):
this relationship, because let's face it, I was with him
for fourteen years. It's familiar, it's comfortable, But will I
ever trust it. Will my mind really be present with
trusting this person after all this behavior that I've seen.
The answer is no, So I could be there physically,
but my mind would never be there. My mind would
(29:46):
never be able to relax. So that is a disconnect.
And that's the thing that I really want to talk
to you guys about and just encourage you, is we
never want our body and our mind to be disconnected.
And that's with anything that's with the job, that's with
a relationship, that's even with exercise. You guys, you know
(30:07):
like you know how like your exer like exercising and
like your mind somewhere else, or you're like you put
on this loud music because you just want to get
through the exercise. I can tell you right now that
if you were just present with your body for less time,
for ten fifteen minutes, you would get more out of
that exercise than you would two hours because just again
(30:29):
Hadley's question and the way I talk I answered it,
your body wants you to be with present with it.
It wants you to love, just be in love with
your soul and your your internal self and when we
are connected mind body spirit for whole. And again that
might sound cliche, but think of it in terms of
(30:52):
this relationship that I'm talking about. It would be so
unhealthy for me to be back there and in this
city situation where my mind would be always doubting it.
My mind would be, like, you know, once the relationship
got comfortable again. Maybe not in the beginning because he
would be on his best behavior, right, but once the
relationship got comfortable again, my mind would probably start doubting
(31:16):
it again, questioning it. Oh, what if he goes back
to this behavior, it just wouldn't work. And that's what
I have to That's what I know right now, and
that's what I have I always go back to when
I have these hard feelings come up. I get sad,
I get scared, I get anxious. I think about that.
It's really being truthful with who we are and our
(31:38):
feelings and our gut and our mind and our heart.
So yeah, you guys, trust the unknown. Okay, so let's
go to questions. Ye I hope I'm pronouncing your name right.
VI remind people to drink water and say hydrated always, yes, yes, bye,
thank you. I do electrolytes. I do lemon and water.
(32:00):
I drink warm water throughout the day. I like warm.
You can do cold. But and then if you don't
have electrolytes, you can do salts in your water love that, Okay, Beck?
Is it bad to leave a relationship open ended? Yeah? Okay.
So Beck's question is it bad to leave a relationship
a relationship open ended for possible friendship. I don't know
(32:24):
your personal situation. I just opened up and I shared
with you my experience. I feel like this specific person
for me, we could probably get to a friendship down
the line, but right now, because we're both feeling on
some levels. Obviously, he's just now feeling the effects of
(32:49):
our breakup, which was six years ago, so he's hurting
and dealing with heartbreak on a different level than I
am because I dealt with those amos in the beginning.
So right now, I feel like we're not even like
emotionally aligned to be friends, if that makes any sense,
because he wants more. But I feel like down the
(33:12):
line we could probably get there because I do feel
like there is definitely care there on both of our sides.
Like I care for him and he cares for me,
you know, like on a big picture humanity in like
I'm talking about like humanity, you know, like I care
for his person, I care for what happens to him,
(33:34):
and I'm sure he cares for me. And what happens
to me. So to answer your question back, I feel
like it's just it's a personal decision. But just make
sure that you're both really truthful and honest with where
you're at emotionally. So Selle asked, are we talking stalker
(33:56):
with his behavior? Yeah, I think I kind of chuckle
in between my storytelling cell that. I mean it felt
like that yesterday. I mean, come on, he was literally
waiting for me. And I saw him from the juice bar,
like literally parked waiting for me, like he put his
hat on. I was like, oh my God, Like, thank
(34:18):
God for my hypervigilance right that I noticed it, or
else I would have been totally just surprised. So okay, Neil,
do you think he is trying to be a friend
or is he looking to get back? Well, he's he
he's he said to me very I mean through a
lot of messages that he wants the relationship back. So
(34:40):
I can assume right now that where he's at, he
wants the relationship back. And if you listen to my
whole story, I tried, you know, I did try, because,
like I said, there was a lot of love there,
but there was no change. And I feel like when
I did try seriously about it a year and a
(35:00):
half ago, now, that was kind of his window then
to really profess what he's talking about now. So again
that's the timeline. I just don't get it. I don't
get it, like I just won't understand that why men
need and listen. I'm not discarding men. I really want
(35:22):
you guys. To any men that are listening, I am
not at all putting down men. I think you guys
are great. I think we don't as women give you
enough credit. I think you're very intuitive and you're almost
like you kind of almost know us better than we
know you, if that makes any sense. I feel like
men really study women, and they make their slower to
(35:47):
make big decisions as far as like a committed relationship, marriage,
all of that. And so I feel like, please, don't
feel like I am putting down men in any any
sense at all, because I respect you guys, and yeah so,
(36:08):
but in my case and what I have experienced, I've
never had a relationship where yeah, well yeah, maybe in
the beginning they treated me really really good with respect
and and you know, it was a good time. Obviously,
there was a honeymoon stage and then even after the
honeymoon stage, there was still respect and love and care
(36:32):
and good behavior, you know. But in my case, I
have not experienced a sustainability I guess in that so
I am trusting the unknown. So what else, you guys?
Is there any other questions? I feel like I really
opened up here, Okay, v V. Actions speak louder than words, absolutely, VI. Yeah,
(36:58):
they do apsolutely. Yeah, that's another thing that we have
to be careful as women and men. You know, you know,
women can talk too. They I've met women that have
those behaviors, manipulative behaviors, and I'm definitely not one of them.
I just I don't know how how people operate like that.
(37:20):
I really don't. I don't know how they sleep at night.
I just I've never been that person. So yeah, thank
you watching actions rather than words, and that's what I did.
You know. A year and a half ago, I saw
his actions. And again, I think I feel like I've
(37:41):
been a little bit naive, a little bit in relationships
again because of my childhood and the way I was raised.
So I tend to like give people the benefit of
the doubt. And I love love so much that I
want to believe in it and I've gotten hurt. So
(38:02):
does he listen Dana? Dana called in or wrote in, said,
does he listen to the show? Do you think he
might get the hint and change his behavior knowing how
you feel? I thought about that, Dana, when I was
thinking about sharing the story. I thought he might be
listening to the show. I don't know, but I'm talking
(38:23):
my truth. I'm speaking my truth. And thank you for
the content if you are listening to the show, because
it just tied right into what I was wanting to
talk about today, which was trusting me unknown. And the
second part of the question, do you think he might
you know? Like I said, Dana, I feel like as
(38:45):
much as I would want to believe that he would change,
I think for me again, I go down the line
in my mind of when the relationship would get comfortable,
and that's when I would could probably become less trusting
and less just feeling safe. Yeah. Yeah, that's what I'm
(39:08):
trying to get at, feeling safe in the relationship. Because
here's the thing. Right now, I think he thinks this
is what I want. I want you back, I want
the relationship back, blah blah. But again, like when we
were in our tenuere relationship. When he got comfortable, things changed.
So but here's the thing. Let's say, hypothetically I gave
(39:32):
him this whatever, fifth effing chance, and down the line
he got comfortable again. It's like he doesn't even know
down the line how he's going to feel when he
gets comfortable. Do you understand what I'm saying? Like he
thinks he knows how he feels now, but he doesn't
(39:52):
know how he's going to feel once he gets comfortable
down the line. And that's what where I go in
my mind, like, yeah, you know, oh, and you think
you know what you want now, But down the line,
when it's you know, hunky dory and I'm all in
again and you know you're feeling more safe, then is
your ego gonna need stroking out in the real world?
(40:15):
You know what I'm saying from other women, and I
think that's where I go. So, you, guys, I know
romantic relationships can be challenging, but I think if you
do have a good respectful partner and partnership and open
communication and honesty and a good foundation of friendship, I
(40:38):
feel like it could be sustainable, you know, I feel
like it could and some a man for instance, that
has crossed the threshold to manhood and really want to
love one woman is the key, right because you know,
(41:00):
face it, men are brought up and you know, society
teaches them to have multiple women, just like society teaches
us as women to look a certain way, dress a
certain way, you know, speak a certain way, be submissive
to the man, whatever it is. So yeah, I hope
(41:22):
this was helpful you guys. Thank you for listening, and
I love all the questions and thank you for allowing
me to be open and vulnerable today and share a
little bit more about myself. I feel like I'm sharing
a little bit more every time I go on Live solo.
So stay tuned for next week or the week after
(41:43):
that when I have my modem fixed and this whole
timing thing is on point again. In the meantime, trust
the unknown, trust your gut, surround yourself with great relationships,
and love your body and love your life. Take good
care
Any health related information on the following show provides general
information only. Content presented on any show by any host
or guests should not be substituted for a doctor's advice.
Always consult your physician before beginning any new diet, exercise,
or treatment program.
Speaker 2 (00:25):
Hello, welcome to Love Your Body, Love Your Life. My
name is Jenna. I'm the host of the podcast. I'm
also the author of the book titled Love Your Body,
Love Your Life, Fifty two Tips that will Radically change
your health. You can find my book on Amazon and
on Barnes Andnoble dot com. And I am just going
(00:46):
to preface the show that if you're watching this live,
I really apologize for the delay in the video. I
have not been live you guys in like I don't know,
two three weeks or something because of this reason. And
I literally just got my modem, my brand new modem,
sent to me like ten minutes before going live today.
(01:08):
So if for whatever reason, I freeze, we're probably just
going to cut the show. But if it just continues
on with this little delay, then please just continue to
listen on audio because I will continue to talk, although
you won't be able to see me. So with that
all said, welcome to the show, you guys. I'm happy
(01:32):
to be back live. I do love doing the show live.
It's just this little technical issue that I have to
get over. And this kind of podcast is a little
bit different because it's live and it's not pre recorded,
so we can't just pre record this and then edit
it or anything like that. So it's a little bit
different of a platform. I guess, which I love. You know,
(01:56):
gives me the what do I want to say? Like,
I'm always very on my toes to do the show
live because there is no editing here. So yeah, So
today's topic is just a summertime catch up with me.
(02:16):
I've been doing the show a solo a boy myself
more than ever this year since I started the podcast
back in twenty nineteen, I've been doing more solo episodes.
So it's a summertime catchup. And also I want to
get into the topic of trusting the unknown, and today
I'm going to open up and be a little bit
(02:39):
more vulnerable than I've ever been on the show and
just going to talk a little bit more about my
personal life in terms of that topic of trusting the unknown.
So we'll get into that in a bit but in
terms of summertime so far, it's been. It's it's been interesting,
(03:01):
it's been it's been fun, and it's been i'd say
what I want to say, Well, I feel like we
really do have the power to create our own reality
and our own destiny. Right, So what I have decided
to do is to place myself back into the music
(03:24):
studio and record another original song and one more cover song,
which I'm super duper excited about. I'm calling it my
little summer project, and I'm just happy about it. You guys,
I love singing and I love recording music. I mean,
(03:46):
I love singing. In my house, I have I have
a microphone, I have a little like setup, I have
a piano, I have some guitars. I have my own
little like music room that I can just sing my
heart out in. So it's definitely different when I'm in
the music studio and I'm actually working on a project.
(04:06):
But I feel like it, you know, makes me a
a better singer and a better artist in general, because
I have to really be present with the piece of
art that I am creating. The piece that comes really
simple to me is the writing of the lyrics. So
(04:28):
I definitely would consider myself a poet lash lyricist. That
piece actually comes really easy to me. I'm definitely a writer.
I just announced I'm an author of a book, and
I just feel like I can get lost in journaling
my feelings and I'm actually better at, I feel expressing
(04:52):
my feelings in written form because well, number one, because
I feel like nobody is going to read it and
I can just say whatever I want. And number two
because I feel like I can just use my imagination
and just go wherever I want to go and just
(05:12):
create this song, I guess, or this poem, and I
kind of know what I'm talking about, and the reader
will just interpret it however they want to read it,
however they want to interpret it, or the person that
is listening to my song. So that's kind of a
little update for me my little summer project. I've been
(05:35):
doing a lot more coaching with women. I've announced on
the show that I am definitely pivoting this year into
more of women's coaching. It's basically a therapy session with
energy work, is the best way that I can describe
it in Layman's terms. And the theme I guess that's
(05:58):
been coming up with women is a lot of inner
child healing, which doesn't surprise me because that was kind
of my big epiphany. When I healed my inner child,
I actually started writing more and poems started to just
kind of fall out of me more, and I found
(06:20):
more of my true authentic voice. So it doesn't surprise
me that I'm attracting women that need inner child healing,
that have family dynamics that have been hard, and they
want a different perspective on the family dynamics. And that's
kind of one of my genius points if I can
(06:41):
be honest, is hearing somebody and knowing where they're trauma
lies and why it lies there, and how I can
give them a totally different perspective on their own trauma
and their own situations so they're not in victimhood, Okay,
(07:02):
because when we're caught in victimhood with our trauma, then
we can't create. I just said, you know, when I
started the show, I do feel like we are definitely
the creators of our own life, and when we're stuck
in victimhood and trauma, we are not allowed to have
that creativity flow through our body and our mind and
(07:25):
be present to what wants to rise. Like kind of
like our intuition or our wisdom wants to rise and
we can't catch it if we're still caught in fight
or flight, or our cortisol is high, or are we're
stuck in anger or jealousy or emotions that just don't
(07:47):
serve us. You know, they're heavier density emotions that actually
can ground us if we work with the energies correctly,
they can actually ground us into being more of who
we are. And that's one of the things that I
work with my clients on is just taking those dense density,
(08:10):
those higher density energies of the negativity, the sadness, the anger,
the jealousies, the all the heavy emotions that we don't
want to feel. We have to feel them, you guys,
and it helps us ground into more of the truth
of who we are. So yeah, so that's a little
bit of an update with my coaching. And thank you
(08:34):
for the questions. I you know, I definitely encourage questions.
At any point, I will stop and answer questions. So
we did have one question come in Hadley asks how
do we remain in control? Okay, So I feel like
(08:56):
your question, Hadley, I mean it's really broad because as
I don't have context around what you mean by in control.
But as far as you're emotional, like if you're you're
coming up against like outbursts that you don't like in yourself,
or like anger outbursts, or like you don't want to
(09:19):
say something that you don't mean. I would say the
easiest way to remain in control is, first of all,
you have to learn how to remain in your body.
So I'll say that again. We have to Oh okay,
so Hadley is now saying, how do we remain in
control of our life is going when so much happens
(09:42):
beyond our control? Okay, Yeah, let's let's talk about that,
because you are one hundred percent absolutely right that we
are not in control of our external world. Our external world,
we have zero control over any somebody else. We have
zero control over the world and what's happening. We have
(10:05):
zero control over people in our household. We have zero
control over traumas, over people that are meant to leave
our lives, people that suddenly pass away, whatever the case is.
You're one hundred percent right, we have no control over that.
The only thing that we do have control over, Hasley,
(10:28):
is our inner world, our inner dialogue, our inner most
preciousness of ourselves. And this is the exact work that
I teach. It's getting to know yourself on that deep
level and anchoring into more. And I hesitate to use
(10:50):
this word, but it's the truth. It's learning how to
anchor more into your soulful self. The soul knows the
truth truth. The soul is unaffected by external world. There
is a softness and a groundedness and a silence and
(11:12):
a centeredness to the inner being of who you are,
which is your soul. And when you're connected to that
inner being and you're well versed with her or him,
and you're well connected and you have a relationship with
that inner being of yourself, you can remain in control,
(11:33):
in centeredness I feel is the right word, and breathe
with that entity of that of who you are. It's
just it's almost a godlike presence because that's the truth
of who we are. We really are a collective of
the universe. We're breath. We came in, we picked a body,
(11:57):
and we really are breath. We really are. And when
we're done, when we're we've lived our lives and our
soul is ready to go beyond and do something else.
You know, we pass and I know that's deep. It
got deep. But that's the truth of how I want
to answer that question. It's getting to know that that
(12:19):
soulful self and that part of you that really is
centered and grounded and like I said, very anchored in
that truth. And that takes work. It takes a lot
of work. And I'm not saying that when you do
this work you won't be triggered, because you will. You
definitely will. You will come off of the channel, which
(12:41):
is your central channel, your the core of who you are,
your body, your breath. You will come off that several times,
but you will know and you will have the tools
to get back in your centered, groundedness and feel in
control of your body and your mind and your thoughts
and the way you create your life. So I will
get off the soapbox. I hope that answers your question. Hadley.
(13:04):
Thank you so much for the for the question. But
I will just say, you know, just start with breathwork.
It really does. It really anchors you, it really centers you.
Start with meditation, start with getting silent, you know, groundedness.
Journaling helps. Again, you can go to my website at
(13:24):
Genolobos dot com. I have journaling prompts for free on
my website. If you guys want to check that out,
you can also you know, contact me and we can
have a call and go further on that and I
can help you personally. Okay, So Lance asked, how can
we realize when? How can we realize we are off course?
(13:46):
And how can we get back on track? If you're
asking this question, Lance, I feel like you know, you
know in your gut when you're off track. You can
feel it in your gut, you can feel it in
your body. You have anxiety, you have headaches, you have
stomach aches. Your body really communicates with you, guys, all
the time, and how you get back on track is
(14:12):
different for everybody, you know. Hardly asked, I feel a
deeper question. I don't really have again the context, Lance,
but maybe just you know, meditate on your ideas, write
them down, work with a coach, you know, talk to somebody.
I don't know how you feel like you want to
get back on track? Is this about a job? Is
(14:35):
it about you know, something else? But if you're asking
this question, I feel like you do know that you're
off track and you need to pivot and get back
onto something that just feels good. You know, whatever makes
you feel good, just follow that north Star. So yeah,
I love the questions, you guys, keep them coming. I'm
(14:57):
sorry for the delay if you're watching the video, but
hopefully you are listening to the audio and you're getting
something from this. I'm going to take a drink of water,
give me quick second. I want to keep myself hydrated. Here.
This is warm lemon and water. So good. So yeah,
(15:17):
I love the questions. So let's get back on to
Let's see I talked about my coaching. Yeah, so summer's
going well so far. I know it just started, but
there are just a couple of things that I wanted
to catch you up on. And I feel like the
topic of trusting the unknown will help had Lee and
(15:41):
Lance with their questions too. So I'm going to get
into that topic now, which is trusting the unknown, and
I'm going to share a personal story and it's going
to relate to this topic. So so okay, So six
(16:03):
years ago, you guys, I left a very significant relationship,
romantic relationship. I was with this person for fourteen years
and I was completely in love with this person and
for reasons that I will have discernment on. I won't
(16:26):
disclose the reasons why I had to leave the relationship,
but I knew, just like how Lance asked, how do
you know when you're off course? I knew I was
off course with this relationship, and as much as it
hurt me, I needed to leave the relationship. So I did.
(16:47):
And this was six years ago. And throughout the six years,
this person, this particular person, came back in my life
has been actually weaving in and out of my life.
Even though I went on and I dated other people,
this person weaved in out of my life. And about
(17:12):
a year ago, I tried to rekindle this relation, this
relationship with this certain person, and he wasn't honest. I
felt was still playing games, and he was taking you know,
my care and my love for him still for granted,
(17:34):
and I feel like he was acting out of emotions
that he needs to take care of, right And so
I tried a year ago, and I knew that that
wasn't going to work, so I let it go. And
then he continued to kind of weave in and out
(17:55):
of my life. And I will take responsibility for allowing
him to weave in and out of my life life,
right Like I I didn't like shut it off completely.
I think that I was still just maybe hopeful or
still just didn't want to cut the tie, you know.
So recently, very recently, I put down and so I
(18:17):
will say that I felt also that maybe we could
be friends quote unquote, Okay, but very recently I just
realized that it's just not going to work. Like it's
the friendship hope, the hope of the friendship is just
not it's not there right now, Okay. So I put
(18:37):
down a very like a boundary that I haven't done
in the whole six years, and which is like I
just haven't responded. And so now I've set that, I've
I've done this boundary that I have not done before
in the six years. And I feel like since then
(19:00):
there's been some kind of like cuckoo behavior from this person.
So and I will give you context around that. So
yesterday I am I am in a local like shopping
like strip mall or whatever. There is a nail place
(19:20):
in there, there's a hair place in there, there's a
yoga studio in there in this strip mall, and I'm
in there because I had some errants to do. And
one of the errands was I was gonna go get
my water, my my distilled water filled up. I get
these like glass jars and I get this this water
(19:41):
filled up at this juice bar. And I'm in the
juice bar with all my bottles of water. And they're heavy, right,
They're like glass and they're heavy when the water is
filled up. So I'm in the juice bar, I'm the
only one in there. It's getting ready for closing around
five point thirty ish six o'clock. And I'm normally, you guys,
(20:02):
like really hyper vigilant when I'm out and about in
the world. And you know, talking about inner child healing.
That's definitely from my childhood, right, I'm like always watching
my back. I'm like, I'm hyper vigilant. I just am.
I'm just naturally always like watching out to see who's
behind me, who's like It's just it's just a natural
(20:22):
thing that I do, always watching my back, no matter
if I'm with somebody or not. I'm just really aware
of my surrounding. So I'm in the juice bar, I'm
getting my water, and I noticed from the corner of
my eye that this person is across the like way
of the parking lot in his car, no, And I
knew right away that he had seen my car in
(20:46):
the parking lot, okay, And I was like, oh my goodness,
he noticed my car. And now he's going to hang
out and wait until I go to my car, and
then he's gonna either come up to me or you know,
obviously drive up to my car or whatever. And mind you,
I'm trying not to have any communication with him. There's
nothing else to talk about, right, I've set my piece.
(21:09):
I feel like there's you know, care there in this relationship.
But it's like I need to move on, Like we
need to like really allow each other to move on
and heal our hearts. Like let's do this, you know.
So anyways, and I'll get to your questions, you guys,
I promise. So let me just finish my story and
then you know, I'll get to your questions. So anyway,
(21:32):
So I leave the juice bar with my waters and
I'm I'm already like anxious inside because I'm like, Okay,
what the f am I going to do? Right, I'm
I have to leave the parking lot. I don't want
to run into him, So what am I going to do?
So get in my car, put my waters in my car,
get in my car, and I'm looking at the rear
view mirror and he's literally he because he had parked
(21:54):
his car and was waiting for me to leave the
juice bar. And now oh, he sees me in his
car in my car, so he's obviously he turned on
his car getting ready to drive. So I'm looking at
him from the rear view mirror and I can see
he's just literally idle there waiting for me to pull out.
So I to go home, which he knows where I live. Okay,
(22:18):
So to go home, I would have backed up my
car and made a left, and he would have literally
come right there. His plan was just to come right
there and just see me. And so what I did,
and I was laughing, obviously, I was giggling to myself.
I yeah, I know it is stalker behavior. So so
(22:40):
I literally what I did was I backed up my car.
Instead of going left, I went right, And like I
have to giggle, you guys, because I'm like inside, I'm like,
you know, my like I had anxiety, like you know,
that feeling like the fight or flight. It came back,
so I'm like have anxiety. I'm like, okay, I'm going
(23:02):
to make a right to throw him off. So I
made a right, and I'm going around like this other
back like way. I still have to go out a
certain way right, so I still have to drive back
by his car. But I needed to throw him off
a little bit. So I went and I parked like
in this corner area for a little bit, and I thought, okay,
(23:22):
what am I gonna do? What am I gonna do?
So I put my head my head set on like
I was on the phone, my iPods or whatever, like
I was gonna pretend I was on the phone. So
I did, and I have my son glasses on, and
I just thought, okay, I got to get home. And
I drove and he was waiting there like in his car,
(23:44):
and I just drove. I didn't look. I had my
glasses on. I just didn't even look to the left
where he was. I drove straight, and you know, obviously
made it out of the parking lot. I make a
left to go on the main street to go home,
and I mean behavior, you guys, I mean, come on,
he booked it, made a U turn, went on the
(24:06):
other side of the like the street in order for
me to kind of see him as I'm going straight
to go home, and he's kind of coming this way.
I mean, like, what is that? Right? Like, okay, so
my point, right, what is my point in all of this? Well,
I have two. One is I won't will never understand
(24:30):
really why men can behave a certain way in the
relationship when you're in a relationship with a man who
knows they have a good thing in front of them,
or vice versa. I mean, I'm sure women do this
same behavior too, but obviously I'm a female, so I
need to talk from my perspective. I will never understand
(24:54):
why a man sees what they have in front of
him and can act a certain way when they're in
the relationship, Meaning they can disrespect you, they can treat
you with bad behavior, they can act cocky, and then
when you are fed up with it, they can say
(25:14):
I'm sorry, blah blah blah, whatever it is. That's my
first point. I will never understand this. And mind you, guys,
this is six years later, six years later after the
relationship ended. I can see this behavior happening when we
first ended it, or when I first ended it. I
kind of see this kind of behavior then, but he
(25:38):
actually went the opposite way. He if I got into that.
You guys would be like floored, okay about what he
did when we first ended the relationship. Obviously, I went
through the grief, all the grief emotions. I was sad,
I was angry, I was devastated. I went through all
those emotions in the beginning. Thank God, because now six
(26:01):
years later, I feel stronger. You know, this last boundary
was kind of like my last straw, I guess, and
I will definitely attribute that to my healing more my
healing work on my own self, you know, like what
I do for my own healing, my inner child, healing
(26:22):
my trauma. I will attribute that last boundary to that.
So anyways, my point is, you guys, I don't get
that as far as men are concerned, why they can
act one way and then come back and just apologize
and expect for the women to be like, oh, okay,
well okay, we'll just you know, we'll just pat you
(26:43):
on the back. Don't do that again. Okay, It's fine, Oh,
I you know, I'll just I'll accept the bad behavior,
Like what the f like? Really they expect for us
to just be like excusing that, and just like I
don't get it, Like I don't know, like they just
feel like our hearts are just this thing that they
(27:04):
can crush, Like no, thank you, Okay, anyways, I'll get
off of that. The other thing that I really want
to talk about, though, is trusting the unknown, because if
I'm honest, I get scared. I get scared I'm not
going to meet anybody like we had that connection. I
get scared that I might not meet somebody that I
(27:26):
feel at home with. I get scared that I'm just
not gonna ever have this kind of love, this love
that I had for this person in my life. And
what's interesting, and I feel like we get tested a
lot is yesterday, while I was out doing all these errands,
I was getting really nostalgic and I was sad, and
(27:49):
I was like, where are these feelings coming from? Like
I haven't felt like this in a long time. And
when I'm sad, I allow myself to be sad. I cry,
I'm in the carbo my So I just let it.
I let it come down, because if I don't, then
it'll just fester and it's worse. So I get sad.
You guys, I get scared. I get all these things.
(28:12):
But at the end of the day. What I want
to say is that I am more in trust of
the unknown that I've ever been because here is what
I know for sure. And this is what I want
to encourage you guys to do. If you're in a relationship,
or if you're in a job, or if you're in
just a situation where the unknown is needed, but you
(28:36):
know that the unknown is more truthful to you and
your heart, then the familiar is like a familiar relationship
or a familiar job, or just a familiarity of where
you know in your heart and gut it doesn't feel
right anymore, and the unknown is more truthful. It's scarier,
(29:00):
but it's the truth. Then I wholeheartedly encourage you to
trust that truth, because here's what happens when we are
in something that is not our truth. Our body is there,
but our mind is not. So I'll give you an example.
If I were to go back to this familiarity in
(29:24):
this relationship, because let's face it, I was with him
for fourteen years. It's familiar, it's comfortable, But will I
ever trust it. Will my mind really be present with
trusting this person after all this behavior that I've seen.
The answer is no, So I could be there physically,
but my mind would never be there. My mind would
(29:46):
never be able to relax. So that is a disconnect.
And that's the thing that I really want to talk
to you guys about and just encourage you, is we
never want our body and our mind to be disconnected.
And that's with anything that's with the job, that's with
a relationship, that's even with exercise. You guys, you know
(30:07):
like you know how like your exer like exercising and
like your mind somewhere else, or you're like you put
on this loud music because you just want to get
through the exercise. I can tell you right now that
if you were just present with your body for less time,
for ten fifteen minutes, you would get more out of
that exercise than you would two hours because just again
(30:29):
Hadley's question and the way I talk I answered it,
your body wants you to be with present with it.
It wants you to love, just be in love with
your soul and your your internal self and when we
are connected mind body spirit for whole. And again that
might sound cliche, but think of it in terms of
(30:52):
this relationship that I'm talking about. It would be so
unhealthy for me to be back there and in this
city situation where my mind would be always doubting it.
My mind would be, like, you know, once the relationship
got comfortable again. Maybe not in the beginning because he
would be on his best behavior, right, but once the
relationship got comfortable again, my mind would probably start doubting
(31:16):
it again, questioning it. Oh, what if he goes back
to this behavior, it just wouldn't work. And that's what
I have to That's what I know right now, and
that's what I have I always go back to when
I have these hard feelings come up. I get sad,
I get scared, I get anxious. I think about that.
It's really being truthful with who we are and our
(31:38):
feelings and our gut and our mind and our heart.
So yeah, you guys, trust the unknown. Okay, so let's
go to questions. Ye I hope I'm pronouncing your name right.
VI remind people to drink water and say hydrated always, yes, yes, bye,
thank you. I do electrolytes. I do lemon and water.
(32:00):
I drink warm water throughout the day. I like warm.
You can do cold. But and then if you don't
have electrolytes, you can do salts in your water love that, Okay, Beck?
Is it bad to leave a relationship open ended? Yeah? Okay.
So Beck's question is it bad to leave a relationship
a relationship open ended for possible friendship. I don't know
(32:24):
your personal situation. I just opened up and I shared
with you my experience. I feel like this specific person
for me, we could probably get to a friendship down
the line, but right now, because we're both feeling on
some levels. Obviously, he's just now feeling the effects of
(32:49):
our breakup, which was six years ago, so he's hurting
and dealing with heartbreak on a different level than I
am because I dealt with those amos in the beginning.
So right now, I feel like we're not even like
emotionally aligned to be friends, if that makes any sense,
because he wants more. But I feel like down the
(33:12):
line we could probably get there because I do feel
like there is definitely care there on both of our sides.
Like I care for him and he cares for me,
you know, like on a big picture humanity in like
I'm talking about like humanity, you know, like I care
for his person, I care for what happens to him,
(33:34):
and I'm sure he cares for me. And what happens
to me. So to answer your question back, I feel
like it's just it's a personal decision. But just make
sure that you're both really truthful and honest with where
you're at emotionally. So Selle asked, are we talking stalker
(33:56):
with his behavior? Yeah, I think I kind of chuckle
in between my storytelling cell that. I mean it felt
like that yesterday. I mean, come on, he was literally
waiting for me. And I saw him from the juice bar,
like literally parked waiting for me, like he put his
hat on. I was like, oh my God, Like, thank
(34:18):
God for my hypervigilance right that I noticed it, or
else I would have been totally just surprised. So okay, Neil,
do you think he is trying to be a friend
or is he looking to get back? Well, he's he
he's he said to me very I mean through a
lot of messages that he wants the relationship back. So
(34:40):
I can assume right now that where he's at, he
wants the relationship back. And if you listen to my
whole story, I tried, you know, I did try, because,
like I said, there was a lot of love there,
but there was no change. And I feel like when
I did try seriously about it a year and a
(35:00):
half ago, now, that was kind of his window then
to really profess what he's talking about now. So again
that's the timeline. I just don't get it. I don't
get it, like I just won't understand that why men
need and listen. I'm not discarding men. I really want
(35:22):
you guys. To any men that are listening, I am
not at all putting down men. I think you guys
are great. I think we don't as women give you
enough credit. I think you're very intuitive and you're almost
like you kind of almost know us better than we
know you, if that makes any sense. I feel like
men really study women, and they make their slower to
(35:47):
make big decisions as far as like a committed relationship, marriage,
all of that. And so I feel like, please, don't
feel like I am putting down men in any any
sense at all, because I respect you guys, and yeah so,
(36:08):
but in my case and what I have experienced, I've
never had a relationship where yeah, well yeah, maybe in
the beginning they treated me really really good with respect
and and you know, it was a good time. Obviously,
there was a honeymoon stage and then even after the
honeymoon stage, there was still respect and love and care
(36:32):
and good behavior, you know. But in my case, I
have not experienced a sustainability I guess in that so
I am trusting the unknown. So what else, you guys?
Is there any other questions? I feel like I really
opened up here, Okay, v V. Actions speak louder than words, absolutely, VI. Yeah,
(36:58):
they do apsolutely. Yeah, that's another thing that we have
to be careful as women and men. You know, you know,
women can talk too. They I've met women that have
those behaviors, manipulative behaviors, and I'm definitely not one of them.
I just I don't know how how people operate like that.
(37:20):
I really don't. I don't know how they sleep at night.
I just I've never been that person. So yeah, thank
you watching actions rather than words, and that's what I did.
You know. A year and a half ago, I saw
his actions. And again, I think I feel like I've
(37:41):
been a little bit naive, a little bit in relationships
again because of my childhood and the way I was raised.
So I tend to like give people the benefit of
the doubt. And I love love so much that I
want to believe in it and I've gotten hurt. So
(38:02):
does he listen Dana? Dana called in or wrote in, said,
does he listen to the show? Do you think he
might get the hint and change his behavior knowing how
you feel? I thought about that, Dana, when I was
thinking about sharing the story. I thought he might be
listening to the show. I don't know, but I'm talking
(38:23):
my truth. I'm speaking my truth. And thank you for
the content if you are listening to the show, because
it just tied right into what I was wanting to
talk about today, which was trusting me unknown. And the
second part of the question, do you think he might
you know? Like I said, Dana, I feel like as
(38:45):
much as I would want to believe that he would change,
I think for me again, I go down the line
in my mind of when the relationship would get comfortable,
and that's when I would could probably become less trusting
and less just feeling safe. Yeah. Yeah, that's what I'm
(39:08):
trying to get at, feeling safe in the relationship. Because
here's the thing. Right now, I think he thinks this
is what I want. I want you back, I want
the relationship back, blah blah. But again, like when we
were in our tenuere relationship. When he got comfortable, things changed.
So but here's the thing. Let's say, hypothetically I gave
(39:32):
him this whatever, fifth effing chance, and down the line
he got comfortable again. It's like he doesn't even know
down the line how he's going to feel when he
gets comfortable. Do you understand what I'm saying? Like he
thinks he knows how he feels now, but he doesn't
(39:52):
know how he's going to feel once he gets comfortable
down the line. And that's what where I go in
my mind, like, yeah, you know, oh, and you think
you know what you want now, But down the line,
when it's you know, hunky dory and I'm all in
again and you know you're feeling more safe, then is
your ego gonna need stroking out in the real world?
(40:15):
You know what I'm saying from other women, and I
think that's where I go. So, you, guys, I know
romantic relationships can be challenging, but I think if you
do have a good respectful partner and partnership and open
communication and honesty and a good foundation of friendship, I
(40:38):
feel like it could be sustainable, you know, I feel
like it could and some a man for instance, that
has crossed the threshold to manhood and really want to
love one woman is the key, right because you know,
(41:00):
face it, men are brought up and you know, society
teaches them to have multiple women, just like society teaches
us as women to look a certain way, dress a
certain way, you know, speak a certain way, be submissive
to the man, whatever it is. So yeah, I hope
(41:22):
this was helpful you guys. Thank you for listening, and
I love all the questions and thank you for allowing
me to be open and vulnerable today and share a
little bit more about myself. I feel like I'm sharing
a little bit more every time I go on Live solo.
So stay tuned for next week or the week after
(41:43):
that when I have my modem fixed and this whole
timing thing is on point again. In the meantime, trust
the unknown, trust your gut, surround yourself with great relationships,
and love your body and love your life. Take good
care
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