November 6, 2025 • 34 mins
Discover how to live and lead authentically — in life, relationships, and business. Learn how to uncover who you truly are, what you feel, what you need, and what you want, and then express that in healthy, empowered ways. When you are authentic, you naturally attract healthier relationships, more joy, and a thriving business aligned with your purpose.
The Inspired and Empowered Living Radio Show is broadcast live Thursdays at 5PM ET on W4WN Radio - Women 4 Women Network (www.w4wn.com) part of Talk 4 Radio (www.talk4radio.com) on the Talk 4 Media Network (www.talk4media.com). The Inspired and Empowered Living Radio Show TV Show is viewed on Talk 4 TV (www.talk4tv.com).
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The Inspired and Empowered Living Radio Show is broadcast live Thursdays at 5PM ET on W4WN Radio - Women 4 Women Network (www.w4wn.com) part of Talk 4 Radio (www.talk4radio.com) on the Talk 4 Media Network (www.talk4media.com). The Inspired and Empowered Living Radio Show TV Show is viewed on Talk 4 TV (www.talk4tv.com).
The Inspired and Empowered Living Radio Show Podcast is also available on Talk 4 Media (www.talk4media.com), Talk 4 Podcasting (www.talk4podcasting.com), iHeartRadio, Amazon Music, Pandora, Spotify, Audible, and over 100 other podcast outlets.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Any health related information on the following show provides general
information only. Content presented on any show by any host
or guest should not be substituted for a doctor's advice.
Always consult your physician before beginning any new diet, exercise,
or treatment program.
Speaker 2 (00:51):
Hello everyone, and welcome to the Inspired and Empowered Living
TV show and podcast. We are live Thursdays at five
pm Eastern on top for TV dot com, W four,
WN dot com, and my YouTube channel. And today we
continue with Part for these Steps have sneeze At wants
(01:16):
to come to the Steps to an authentic life and business.
Part for You'll discover what it is you need to
do to be able to become more authentic. You'll understand
how to go from inauthentic, which you may not even
realize that you do too being your authentic self. And
(01:40):
you'll discover from how to express this in ways that
will support you to be able to become more of
your authentic self. I'm your host, Nancy Deutsch, licensed clinical
social worker, certified hypnotherapist, and Intuitive through expert, and I
(02:01):
combine my counseling, coaching and intuition to transform your life.
So this show is not a replacement for therapy or counseling.
It is for educational purposes only. So let's talk when
we talk about authentic what does that really mean? And
(02:24):
I know that we're deep into part four, but I
always for those of you who may be tuning in
for the first time, I always like to review what
is authentic authentic. Your authentic self is the part of
you that is real, that is true, that is genuine.
And when I talk about your authentic self, I am
(02:48):
talking about the part of you that I call your
super conscious mind. It's the part of you that I
call your higher self, that wise, unconditionally loving part of you.
It is your soul, the core energy, essence of who
you are. You are at the core of who you
(03:11):
are is pure light and love, and you have skills
and characteristics, and your soul wants you to express itself
and that is your authentic self. Seems my allergies are
getting to me, so I don't know what's going on.
(03:36):
All right, Well, I'm human too, so okay, so let's
talk about ways that I had to created a list
of ways you can be inauthentic, and then we're going
to go over how to transform that and be authentic
and as always, if you have any questions, you can
always type them into the chat so you don't need
(04:01):
to you when you are in a relationship or you're
in relationships all the time with the people in your life,
whether they are family or friends, or coworkers or work
and or clients, and what's really important is learning to
(04:27):
express your wants and your needs. And a lot of
times you may shut shut down those wants or needs thinking, oh,
you know, I don't want and we were talking about
this last show. Oh I don't want to avoid I
want to avoid conflict, I don't need, I don't really
want to share I you know, et cetera, et cetera.
(04:49):
But what happens is is that when you are not
expressing your wants and needs. Now, of course, the first
thing before you can express your wants and needs is
gaining the clarity of what your needs and wants are like,
is what feels true to your heart, Because the way
(05:12):
that you are connecting with your authentic self is through
your heart, through your feelings. When you feel that joy or.
Speaker 3 (05:19):
Peace, or passion or excitement or love, all of those
are emotions of your soul and your heart, and those
are your authentic self truth.
Speaker 2 (05:36):
And so it's learning to discover what your needs, wants,
desires are and that's the self awareness and then being
able to clearly communicate those wants, needs, desires to the
people in your life and to do it in healthy ways.
(06:00):
And so you want to be able to do that
in a healthy way. And healthy ways are owning your feelings,
owning I am feeling blah blah blah, and I really
been getting in touch with what my needs are in
this relationship. And what I really need is when we're
(06:20):
in conversation, you're really allowing yourself to be present with me. Now,
if we need to come up with a time that
works for both of us, totally get it. So let's
schedule a time, and let's come up with because I
want to hear where you're at, and I really want
(06:41):
you to hear where I'm at. So that would be
like a healthy conversation. That is what you want to
bring forth. When you're in your authentic self, you're able
to share and express yourself in those healthy ways. And
when you are being your authentic self. Now, there are
(07:07):
people in your life, and I like to look at
the people in your life and each person in your life.
There are going to be people that are your deep,
your deep connections, the people that you really trust and
you can share more of who you are. And I'm
(07:27):
hoping that you all have those kinds of relationships because
those kinds of relationships are crucial for inspired and empowered
life and thriving life and business. So you really want
to be able to have those core supportive relationships where
you can be you. Now. There are times where you
(07:50):
may have more superficial relationships, and when you have more
of those, then I want to invite you to assess
of those relationships, are they really relationships where perhaps you
may be able to go deeper, Maybe there's ways to
explore depth in those relationships. And you want to be
(08:13):
able to be able to really experience deeper, more intimate
connections and make choices of the relationships in your life,
relationships that are working and relationships that are not. Now,
in your business, you are when you're in your ego
(08:39):
and you're not in your authentic self, you may end
up feeling like you may end up being pushy, or
people perceive you as pushy, or they perceive you as inauthentic,
And it's really going to be important for you to
come back to that authentic you so that you can
(09:00):
then share from that authentic self. And the other way
is you want to overcome your fears and your fear
of judgment. And I see Misty wrote in and I'm
going to get to your question, Misty as soon as
(09:21):
I finish this thought. So your fear of judgment, when
you have that fear of judgment, that is actually coming.
And one of the ways that you can define in
authentic self is the ego. Now, the ego wants to
protect itself, it wants to it can be it's that
(09:45):
part of you that needs healing. I call the ego
the wounded ego, and I really believe on a psychological
level we all need healthy egos and that part of
being authentic is learning to have a healthy ego. But
when you're in that fear of judgment and you're judging
(10:09):
yourself or you're judging someone else, you're not in that
authentic place. And the way to get there is learning acceptance.
It's learning to accept yourself and learning to accept others.
So that's really crucial in that becoming more authentic. So
(10:29):
Misty says or asks are all relationships worth going to
a deeper diving and if not, should you drop the relationships?
So this is what I'm going to So not all
relationships are worth going to a deeper dive, and what
you want to do? So you know I talk about
(10:53):
the three minds, So I'm going to get into the
three minds. And thank you Misty for the question. When
you have your conscious mind and your conscious mind is
you tuning in whether you're tuning in live or another time,
So thank you conscious mind of yours. And your conscious
mind makes decisions. And it's your conscious mind combined with
(11:14):
your super conscious mind that's going to make the decisions
of what relationships to keep and which ones to let
go of. So it's going to learn. It's about learning, assessment,
and discernment of your relationships. Now your subconscious mind, every
(11:35):
relationship that you have, whether it's in your life or
in your business, is serving some kind of purpose. Now
in your subconscious mind, you have limiting beliefs and emotions
from the moment you will conceive to present time. And
what happens is is from what you learn certain ways
(11:59):
of being. And this is also about that or inauthentic.
You learn certain ways of being. You learn certain strategies
of living, but they may not be effective to who
you really are, and they're not necessarily effective for your
authentic self. So learning to assess in your subconscious mind,
(12:24):
because what happens when you get into a relationship, whether
it's in your life or in your business, you are
it's about looking at what is it that this relationship,
what need has it filled? And it's learning to understand
the needs of that relationship. Now, as you get healthier,
(12:48):
as you grow, as you expand more into your authentic self,
they're are going to be relationships that are not going
to be serving you anymore. And if you're holding onto
those relationships because of obligation or because of shoulds or
have to this is about you asking yourself, what are
(13:12):
you really getting from that relationship? Is this relationship potentially
can it serve your highest good? Can it serve that
authentic self of yours? Or is it a relationship that
needs to be let go of? And that's about you
(13:33):
taking time to understand number one, understand the relationship, what
and the purpose it's serving or the purpose it was
serving when you formed that relationship in your life. So
as you grow, as you heal As you change you
and you become more of who you are, your needs
(13:56):
change you change. Remember this is a journey, and so
who you were when that relationship began at that point
it may have served those needs, and then you need
to look at is this a relationship that can still
serve those needs or is it a relationship that maybe
(14:16):
you need to let go of. And the way that
I would ask or invite you to pose the question
is is this relationship or is me continuing this relationship
from my highest and greatest good? Now? Just because a
relationship has challenges, it doesn't mean that you have to
(14:41):
let go of it. It may be your teacher and
what you need for your high is good, or it
may be a superficial relationship that you've been hanging on
and maybe you'd be better off letting go. So the
way that I invite you to look at whether you
drop the relationship or not, is again tuning in what
(15:05):
need it originally served, Can its fulfill needs now in
who you are and who you're becoming, and is this
relationship for your highest good? Now? This may take some
work on your part because ultimately it's about you getting
clarity about what is it that's being again, what they're
(15:28):
serving what you need? And is this a relationship that
can fulfill your needs? You may discover now here's something
I invite you to do. Suppose you've lived at a
certain level of surface level and this person may or
(15:48):
may not be able to go deeper, but you don't
know that. Now this requires you to be authentic or vulnerable,
and it may feel a little scary. I'm not saying
it wouldn't be, but maybe it's about you expressing more
of who you are. Like I'll give you an example.
(16:09):
When their Susie, somebody that I've been, that I've worked with.
When Susie had this relationship in her life and they
you know, they had a certain level of communication and
it was i would say it was more surface level.
But as Susie began to heal and change and grow,
(16:35):
what started happening is she started expressing more of who
she was, and she started expressing more of her authentic
feelings and her needs, desires. And what started happening surprise Susie,
because what started happening was that she started seeing this
(16:59):
person open up to her too. Because sometimes what happens
in relationship is you need to be the one to
take the risk. Now, this person that Susie was in
a relationship, even though it was surface level, there was
the ability to go deeper. And that's what I encourage
and invite you. And you may not know that until
(17:23):
you try it, until you express your authentic self, and
then you may see if it can work or not.
So there may be possibilities where you may not realize
it and you may need to take the risk. Now,
if somebody is really toxic or really negative, or really
(17:45):
demeaning or not healthy, that's a different story. And in
order for you to take care of yourself and set
the boundaries, you may need to drop the relationship. So
if it's that kind of case, then I support you
in dropping a relationship that doesn't serve you, and that
(18:05):
could be really toxic for you because that's not going
to help you, not going to support you in your
authentic self. So Anastasia has a question, can you grow
out of a relationship and is it worth holding onto
it both people grow absolutely, okay, So if yes, you
(18:25):
can grow out of a relationship. And so there's two
possibilities that may happen in relationships if both people are
on the growth path. So if you are both on
the growth path, there may come a time in your
relationship where both of your your needs have changed and
(18:47):
you need to and your needs like where you began,
and the relationship has changed, and now who you are
and who you're becoming is different, and who they are
and who they're becoming is different, And so you may
make a decision and hopefully it could be a mutual
(19:08):
decision that now if this is a romantic like, it's
different if it's romantic, and if it's friendship, although both
of those situations, if you have too healthier individuals, you
can do it on healthy terms, Like, you know what,
maybe right now it would serve us to part ways
(19:31):
now if you're both on a growth path and the
relationship has changed and the needs have changed. However, you're
both growing and there's a possibility that you can grow together.
And as you grow together, then you can create these
amazing experiences. Whether this is a romantic relationship or a friendship,
(19:55):
you can create these amazing experiences that open up new
possibilities for both of you as individuals and in that relationship.
And I'm not just talking about romantic relationships. I'm talking
about friendships and close friendships too. So being on the
growth path is definitely a good sign if both of
(20:19):
you are willing to grow. Now, if one of you
is willing to grow and the other one isn't there,
that can be tricky because they may not appear. How
do I say this, I'm going to give you another example. So,
Jessica and I work together. And when Jessica and I
(20:42):
first met, she was in a relationship. She was actually married,
and she was angry and she wasn't sure she really
wanted it. She was thinking about divorce and she wasn't
really sure she really wanted to continue the relationship. And
then what happened, Well, she yeah, as we started working
(21:03):
together and we started working on her issues and she
started healing the anger, and she actually made a decision
to stay in the relationship. And this person, even though
he was not in therapy himself, he was still willing
to grow. He was still open to growing with Jessica.
(21:28):
And so so if somebody is willing and open enough
to grow with you in whatever way, then the relationship
has a good forecast. And if not, then then that's
when you need to look at. Is this relationship for
(21:48):
my highest good. Now, if you're angry at somebody, just
because you're angry, that doesn't mean it's like stop and again,
you want to work through your a go your issues
and ask yourself, is this relationship is to continue this
relationship for my highest good? And that's what I invite
(22:11):
you to ask. Relationships are our greatest teachers. That are
greatest teachers. So and again, if you have any questions
about anything that I said, I invite you to ask
the question. So and we talked about this in terms
of a way that you could be Inauthentic is striving
(22:33):
to please or being a people pleaser. And when you
are wanting to be authentic, you want to come from
your truth and your purpose. And even though you may
strive to please, you want to come from purpose. You
want to be able to really connects what's the highest good,
(22:56):
what's the purpose of this of what's going on or
the situation. So it's learning to do the self care
and say no when you need to say no, and
say yes when you really want to say yes. And
I know we talked about that on other shows. So again,
(23:17):
control and perfection, if you're doing any kind of control
or perfection, that's inauthentic. Anytime you try to control yourself
or someone else, you're being inauthentic. And when I say
controlling yourself, it's like things have to be this way,
or you have to do it this way, or it
(23:39):
should be just so. That's the perfection piece. So there's
this controlling piece, and if you're doing that, then you
are not being authentic. You're being inauthentic. And then you
want to come to that place of being able to
(24:00):
come from that place of truth. And there's this place
of trust and surrender in your with yourself and trusting
yourself more, learning to trust yourself more, and also learning
to trust your higher aspects of self and learning to
trust God or the universe. So all of that is
(24:22):
part of it. And when you are looking for the inner,
when you're looking for external validation, that approval, that a love,
or you're doing things for approval or love, then you
are looking that's your inauthentic self. That's not being authentic.
(24:44):
And when you are being authentic is you're coming from
that love and you actually are able to give to
yourself and give that internal validation, having that inner knowing,
inner trust, and inner love of yourself self so that
you don't need the outside approval. And when you are
(25:08):
dimming your light, and you're dimming your light and you
are not allowing yourself to shine and really allow yourself
to be seen, to be heard, to be understood, that's
not your authentic self. That is that wounded part of
you that's scared. And learning to really open to shine
(25:34):
your light and express yourself and express your truth is
part of being authentic. So let's talk. Let's talk about
some more steps that you can take to be authentic.
So steps to discover more of who you are? What
(25:55):
do you do? So the first step, and I've talked
about this book or this is crucial. It's having the awareness.
So excuse me. So if you are doing some kind
of behavior and I went through this list and I
took time to go through the list of how you
(26:17):
may be inauthentic because you may not have realized, oh
that's me being inauthentic. I didn't realize that. So I'm
hoping that I'm bringing awareness to those places and spaces
that you may not have even realized and having that
awareness becoming aware that oh, I'm not being authentic, I
(26:41):
am not being authentic with myself and I'm not being
authentic with others, and then learning to touch base and
learning to tune in. And one of the greatest ways
to do that is through your body and through your feeling.
So your body gives you clues about things that are
(27:08):
happening or what you're feeling. And when you tune into
your feelings, then you can allow yourself to become more
of that authentic self. And then it's learning. Once you
become aware of being your authentic self, like what's really
(27:32):
going on, what are your wants, what are your needs,
what are your desires, then it's learning to express them
and communicate your authentic self to others. Like what happened
with Susie is she didn't know that this friend and
(27:54):
her could grow together until she started commune unicating more
of who she really was. And that and that is
the possibility of what can happen as you become more
connected with your eventic self and then you start expressing
it with others. And then so and here's the thing again,
(28:20):
this is going back to if you're not in touch
and you're going if you're feeling something but you shut
down and you say I'm fine, I'm fine. And you're
really not fine. I mean, people can pick up your
body language and they hear your voice and so they know.
So it's learning to be able to tune in. And
(28:42):
this is also an example of how you can actually
become more aware of what's going on for you, because
if you're starting to feel something in your throat or
in your heart, or in other in your stomach. A
a lot of my clients they feel stuff in their stomach,
(29:03):
like the fears, the butterflies. But you know, it's not
the positive butterflies, it's the fears that come up. So
those are all signals to be more aware. And it's
learning to be able to ask, to ask for help,
to ask for support. It's learning to be able to
(29:25):
tune in and know when you need support and help.
And then the third one is learning to become more
alignment is really learning to align with who you are
and align with your truth and being in that alignment,
(29:46):
being in that space, excuse me of alignment is being
able to start taking the actions to choose the relationship,
to choose strategies, whether in your personal life or in
your business, that align with who you really are. And
(30:08):
you want to make sure that you're dropping, you're dropping
the shoulds and the have tos, and you're choosing the
want to or what is your heart calling you or
what is the highest good? How can I serve? How
can I make a difference? And you're coming from that perspective.
And then again, remember this is a journey, it's not
(30:35):
a destination, and you are on the journey. And I
really want to acknowledge you for being on the journey.
So congratulations, and I really want to support all of
you that I have a guided meditation that you can
use to help you to uncover in that awareness. If
(30:57):
there's places where you're not sure am I being authentic
or am I not being authentic? You can use this
meditation to get clarity because it takes you through clearing
connection and then you get to communicate with what we
call the higher self that I talked about in the
(31:17):
beginning of the show. So the guided meditation, you're you're
going to go to Inspired and Empowered Living dot com
Forward slash Meditation N E D I T A t
io N so Inspired and Empowered Living dot com the
(31:41):
name of the show dot com Forward Slash Meditation, and
you can download that meditation that will really support you
in becoming more into your authentic self. So there, let
me just feel into and if there's anything else that
(32:02):
wants to come through about this. So what I really
want you all to know is that again, this is
a journey. It's not a destination. And that even if
you take baby steps on the journey and step by
step using that place of awareness to tapping in and
(32:24):
tuning in to who you are, taking time to be
connected with yourself and then the awareness and then being
able to express yourself in authentic ways and learning to
live more from alignment and being able to be in
that alignment so that you're coming from the place of authenticity.
(32:50):
And I want to thank you for being here and
being on the journey with me. I'm really grateful to you,
and thank you to all of you who write the
questions in and thank you for all who are listening
or viewing live and who are listening or viewing at
(33:11):
a later time. And I want to invite you for
next week for more inspired and living and inspired and
empowered living. And we are live on Thursdays at five
pm Eastern on TALKFORTV dot com, W four WN dot
com and my YouTube channel, and you can also check
(33:34):
out the podcast, and you can check out the podcast
on iHeartRadio, Spotify, Apple and Dora, Amazon and many more.
And I wish you all and inspired and empowered day, night,
and week. Have a great one everybody, Bye for now.
Speaker 1 (34:00):
The stat
Any health related information on the following show provides general
information only. Content presented on any show by any host
or guest should not be substituted for a doctor's advice.
Always consult your physician before beginning any new diet, exercise,
or treatment program.
Speaker 2 (00:51):
Hello everyone, and welcome to the Inspired and Empowered Living
TV show and podcast. We are live Thursdays at five
pm Eastern on top for TV dot com, W four,
WN dot com, and my YouTube channel. And today we
continue with Part for these Steps have sneeze At wants
(01:16):
to come to the Steps to an authentic life and business.
Part for You'll discover what it is you need to
do to be able to become more authentic. You'll understand
how to go from inauthentic, which you may not even
realize that you do too being your authentic self. And
(01:40):
you'll discover from how to express this in ways that
will support you to be able to become more of
your authentic self. I'm your host, Nancy Deutsch, licensed clinical
social worker, certified hypnotherapist, and Intuitive through expert, and I
(02:01):
combine my counseling, coaching and intuition to transform your life.
So this show is not a replacement for therapy or counseling.
It is for educational purposes only. So let's talk when
we talk about authentic what does that really mean? And
(02:24):
I know that we're deep into part four, but I
always for those of you who may be tuning in
for the first time, I always like to review what
is authentic authentic. Your authentic self is the part of
you that is real, that is true, that is genuine.
And when I talk about your authentic self, I am
(02:48):
talking about the part of you that I call your
super conscious mind. It's the part of you that I
call your higher self, that wise, unconditionally loving part of you.
It is your soul, the core energy, essence of who
you are. You are at the core of who you
(03:11):
are is pure light and love, and you have skills
and characteristics, and your soul wants you to express itself
and that is your authentic self. Seems my allergies are
getting to me, so I don't know what's going on.
(03:36):
All right, Well, I'm human too, so okay, so let's
talk about ways that I had to created a list
of ways you can be inauthentic, and then we're going
to go over how to transform that and be authentic
and as always, if you have any questions, you can
always type them into the chat so you don't need
(04:01):
to you when you are in a relationship or you're
in relationships all the time with the people in your life,
whether they are family or friends, or coworkers or work
and or clients, and what's really important is learning to
(04:27):
express your wants and your needs. And a lot of
times you may shut shut down those wants or needs thinking, oh,
you know, I don't want and we were talking about
this last show. Oh I don't want to avoid I
want to avoid conflict, I don't need, I don't really
want to share I you know, et cetera, et cetera.
(04:49):
But what happens is is that when you are not
expressing your wants and needs. Now, of course, the first
thing before you can express your wants and needs is
gaining the clarity of what your needs and wants are like,
is what feels true to your heart, Because the way
(05:12):
that you are connecting with your authentic self is through
your heart, through your feelings. When you feel that joy or.
Speaker 3 (05:19):
Peace, or passion or excitement or love, all of those
are emotions of your soul and your heart, and those
are your authentic self truth.
Speaker 2 (05:36):
And so it's learning to discover what your needs, wants,
desires are and that's the self awareness and then being
able to clearly communicate those wants, needs, desires to the
people in your life and to do it in healthy ways.
(06:00):
And so you want to be able to do that
in a healthy way. And healthy ways are owning your feelings,
owning I am feeling blah blah blah, and I really
been getting in touch with what my needs are in
this relationship. And what I really need is when we're
(06:20):
in conversation, you're really allowing yourself to be present with me. Now,
if we need to come up with a time that
works for both of us, totally get it. So let's
schedule a time, and let's come up with because I
want to hear where you're at, and I really want
(06:41):
you to hear where I'm at. So that would be
like a healthy conversation. That is what you want to
bring forth. When you're in your authentic self, you're able
to share and express yourself in those healthy ways. And
when you are being your authentic self. Now, there are
(07:07):
people in your life, and I like to look at
the people in your life and each person in your life.
There are going to be people that are your deep,
your deep connections, the people that you really trust and
you can share more of who you are. And I'm
(07:27):
hoping that you all have those kinds of relationships because
those kinds of relationships are crucial for inspired and empowered
life and thriving life and business. So you really want
to be able to have those core supportive relationships where
you can be you. Now. There are times where you
(07:50):
may have more superficial relationships, and when you have more
of those, then I want to invite you to assess
of those relationships, are they really relationships where perhaps you
may be able to go deeper, Maybe there's ways to
explore depth in those relationships. And you want to be
(08:13):
able to be able to really experience deeper, more intimate
connections and make choices of the relationships in your life,
relationships that are working and relationships that are not. Now,
in your business, you are when you're in your ego
(08:39):
and you're not in your authentic self, you may end
up feeling like you may end up being pushy, or
people perceive you as pushy, or they perceive you as inauthentic,
And it's really going to be important for you to
come back to that authentic you so that you can
(09:00):
then share from that authentic self. And the other way
is you want to overcome your fears and your fear
of judgment. And I see Misty wrote in and I'm
going to get to your question, Misty as soon as
(09:21):
I finish this thought. So your fear of judgment, when
you have that fear of judgment, that is actually coming.
And one of the ways that you can define in
authentic self is the ego. Now, the ego wants to
protect itself, it wants to it can be it's that
(09:45):
part of you that needs healing. I call the ego
the wounded ego, and I really believe on a psychological
level we all need healthy egos and that part of
being authentic is learning to have a healthy ego. But
when you're in that fear of judgment and you're judging
(10:09):
yourself or you're judging someone else, you're not in that
authentic place. And the way to get there is learning acceptance.
It's learning to accept yourself and learning to accept others.
So that's really crucial in that becoming more authentic. So
(10:29):
Misty says or asks are all relationships worth going to
a deeper diving and if not, should you drop the relationships?
So this is what I'm going to So not all
relationships are worth going to a deeper dive, and what
you want to do? So you know I talk about
(10:53):
the three minds, So I'm going to get into the
three minds. And thank you Misty for the question. When
you have your conscious mind and your conscious mind is
you tuning in whether you're tuning in live or another time,
So thank you conscious mind of yours. And your conscious
mind makes decisions. And it's your conscious mind combined with
(11:14):
your super conscious mind that's going to make the decisions
of what relationships to keep and which ones to let
go of. So it's going to learn. It's about learning, assessment,
and discernment of your relationships. Now your subconscious mind, every
(11:35):
relationship that you have, whether it's in your life or
in your business, is serving some kind of purpose. Now
in your subconscious mind, you have limiting beliefs and emotions
from the moment you will conceive to present time. And
what happens is is from what you learn certain ways
(11:59):
of being. And this is also about that or inauthentic.
You learn certain ways of being. You learn certain strategies
of living, but they may not be effective to who
you really are, and they're not necessarily effective for your
authentic self. So learning to assess in your subconscious mind,
(12:24):
because what happens when you get into a relationship, whether
it's in your life or in your business, you are
it's about looking at what is it that this relationship,
what need has it filled? And it's learning to understand
the needs of that relationship. Now, as you get healthier,
(12:48):
as you grow, as you expand more into your authentic self,
they're are going to be relationships that are not going
to be serving you anymore. And if you're holding onto
those relationships because of obligation or because of shoulds or
have to this is about you asking yourself, what are
(13:12):
you really getting from that relationship? Is this relationship potentially
can it serve your highest good? Can it serve that
authentic self of yours? Or is it a relationship that
needs to be let go of? And that's about you
(13:33):
taking time to understand number one, understand the relationship, what
and the purpose it's serving or the purpose it was
serving when you formed that relationship in your life. So
as you grow, as you heal As you change you
and you become more of who you are, your needs
(13:56):
change you change. Remember this is a journey, and so
who you were when that relationship began at that point
it may have served those needs, and then you need
to look at is this a relationship that can still
serve those needs or is it a relationship that maybe
(14:16):
you need to let go of. And the way that
I would ask or invite you to pose the question
is is this relationship or is me continuing this relationship
from my highest and greatest good? Now? Just because a
relationship has challenges, it doesn't mean that you have to
(14:41):
let go of it. It may be your teacher and
what you need for your high is good, or it
may be a superficial relationship that you've been hanging on
and maybe you'd be better off letting go. So the
way that I invite you to look at whether you
drop the relationship or not, is again tuning in what
(15:05):
need it originally served, Can its fulfill needs now in
who you are and who you're becoming, and is this
relationship for your highest good? Now? This may take some
work on your part because ultimately it's about you getting
clarity about what is it that's being again, what they're
(15:28):
serving what you need? And is this a relationship that
can fulfill your needs? You may discover now here's something
I invite you to do. Suppose you've lived at a
certain level of surface level and this person may or
(15:48):
may not be able to go deeper, but you don't
know that. Now this requires you to be authentic or vulnerable,
and it may feel a little scary. I'm not saying
it wouldn't be, but maybe it's about you expressing more
of who you are. Like I'll give you an example.
(16:09):
When their Susie, somebody that I've been, that I've worked with.
When Susie had this relationship in her life and they
you know, they had a certain level of communication and
it was i would say it was more surface level.
But as Susie began to heal and change and grow,
(16:35):
what started happening is she started expressing more of who
she was, and she started expressing more of her authentic
feelings and her needs, desires. And what started happening surprise Susie,
because what started happening was that she started seeing this
(16:59):
person open up to her too. Because sometimes what happens
in relationship is you need to be the one to
take the risk. Now, this person that Susie was in
a relationship, even though it was surface level, there was
the ability to go deeper. And that's what I encourage
and invite you. And you may not know that until
(17:23):
you try it, until you express your authentic self, and
then you may see if it can work or not.
So there may be possibilities where you may not realize
it and you may need to take the risk. Now,
if somebody is really toxic or really negative, or really
(17:45):
demeaning or not healthy, that's a different story. And in
order for you to take care of yourself and set
the boundaries, you may need to drop the relationship. So
if it's that kind of case, then I support you
in dropping a relationship that doesn't serve you, and that
(18:05):
could be really toxic for you because that's not going
to help you, not going to support you in your
authentic self. So Anastasia has a question, can you grow
out of a relationship and is it worth holding onto
it both people grow absolutely, okay, So if yes, you
(18:25):
can grow out of a relationship. And so there's two
possibilities that may happen in relationships if both people are
on the growth path. So if you are both on
the growth path, there may come a time in your
relationship where both of your your needs have changed and
(18:47):
you need to and your needs like where you began,
and the relationship has changed, and now who you are
and who you're becoming is different, and who they are
and who they're becoming is different, And so you may
make a decision and hopefully it could be a mutual
(19:08):
decision that now if this is a romantic like, it's
different if it's romantic, and if it's friendship, although both
of those situations, if you have too healthier individuals, you
can do it on healthy terms, Like, you know what,
maybe right now it would serve us to part ways
(19:31):
now if you're both on a growth path and the
relationship has changed and the needs have changed. However, you're
both growing and there's a possibility that you can grow together.
And as you grow together, then you can create these
amazing experiences. Whether this is a romantic relationship or a friendship,
(19:55):
you can create these amazing experiences that open up new
possibilities for both of you as individuals and in that relationship.
And I'm not just talking about romantic relationships. I'm talking
about friendships and close friendships too. So being on the
growth path is definitely a good sign if both of
(20:19):
you are willing to grow. Now, if one of you
is willing to grow and the other one isn't there,
that can be tricky because they may not appear. How
do I say this, I'm going to give you another example. So,
Jessica and I work together. And when Jessica and I
(20:42):
first met, she was in a relationship. She was actually married,
and she was angry and she wasn't sure she really
wanted it. She was thinking about divorce and she wasn't
really sure she really wanted to continue the relationship. And
then what happened, Well, she yeah, as we started working
(21:03):
together and we started working on her issues and she
started healing the anger, and she actually made a decision
to stay in the relationship. And this person, even though
he was not in therapy himself, he was still willing
to grow. He was still open to growing with Jessica.
(21:28):
And so so if somebody is willing and open enough
to grow with you in whatever way, then the relationship
has a good forecast. And if not, then then that's
when you need to look at. Is this relationship for
(21:48):
my highest good. Now, if you're angry at somebody, just
because you're angry, that doesn't mean it's like stop and again,
you want to work through your a go your issues
and ask yourself, is this relationship is to continue this
relationship for my highest good? And that's what I invite
(22:11):
you to ask. Relationships are our greatest teachers. That are
greatest teachers. So and again, if you have any questions
about anything that I said, I invite you to ask
the question. So and we talked about this in terms
of a way that you could be Inauthentic is striving
(22:33):
to please or being a people pleaser. And when you
are wanting to be authentic, you want to come from
your truth and your purpose. And even though you may
strive to please, you want to come from purpose. You
want to be able to really connects what's the highest good,
(22:56):
what's the purpose of this of what's going on or
the situation. So it's learning to do the self care
and say no when you need to say no, and
say yes when you really want to say yes. And
I know we talked about that on other shows. So again,
(23:17):
control and perfection, if you're doing any kind of control
or perfection, that's inauthentic. Anytime you try to control yourself
or someone else, you're being inauthentic. And when I say
controlling yourself, it's like things have to be this way,
or you have to do it this way, or it
(23:39):
should be just so. That's the perfection piece. So there's
this controlling piece, and if you're doing that, then you
are not being authentic. You're being inauthentic. And then you
want to come to that place of being able to
(24:00):
come from that place of truth. And there's this place
of trust and surrender in your with yourself and trusting
yourself more, learning to trust yourself more, and also learning
to trust your higher aspects of self and learning to
trust God or the universe. So all of that is
(24:22):
part of it. And when you are looking for the inner,
when you're looking for external validation, that approval, that a love,
or you're doing things for approval or love, then you
are looking that's your inauthentic self. That's not being authentic.
(24:44):
And when you are being authentic is you're coming from
that love and you actually are able to give to
yourself and give that internal validation, having that inner knowing,
inner trust, and inner love of yourself self so that
you don't need the outside approval. And when you are
(25:08):
dimming your light, and you're dimming your light and you
are not allowing yourself to shine and really allow yourself
to be seen, to be heard, to be understood, that's
not your authentic self. That is that wounded part of
you that's scared. And learning to really open to shine
(25:34):
your light and express yourself and express your truth is
part of being authentic. So let's talk. Let's talk about
some more steps that you can take to be authentic.
So steps to discover more of who you are? What
(25:55):
do you do? So the first step, and I've talked
about this book or this is crucial. It's having the awareness.
So excuse me. So if you are doing some kind
of behavior and I went through this list and I
took time to go through the list of how you
(26:17):
may be inauthentic because you may not have realized, oh
that's me being inauthentic. I didn't realize that. So I'm
hoping that I'm bringing awareness to those places and spaces
that you may not have even realized and having that
awareness becoming aware that oh, I'm not being authentic, I
(26:41):
am not being authentic with myself and I'm not being
authentic with others, and then learning to touch base and
learning to tune in. And one of the greatest ways
to do that is through your body and through your feeling.
So your body gives you clues about things that are
(27:08):
happening or what you're feeling. And when you tune into
your feelings, then you can allow yourself to become more
of that authentic self. And then it's learning. Once you
become aware of being your authentic self, like what's really
(27:32):
going on, what are your wants, what are your needs,
what are your desires, then it's learning to express them
and communicate your authentic self to others. Like what happened
with Susie is she didn't know that this friend and
(27:54):
her could grow together until she started commune unicating more
of who she really was. And that and that is
the possibility of what can happen as you become more
connected with your eventic self and then you start expressing
it with others. And then so and here's the thing again,
(28:20):
this is going back to if you're not in touch
and you're going if you're feeling something but you shut
down and you say I'm fine, I'm fine. And you're
really not fine. I mean, people can pick up your
body language and they hear your voice and so they know.
So it's learning to be able to tune in. And
(28:42):
this is also an example of how you can actually
become more aware of what's going on for you, because
if you're starting to feel something in your throat or
in your heart, or in other in your stomach. A
a lot of my clients they feel stuff in their stomach,
(29:03):
like the fears, the butterflies. But you know, it's not
the positive butterflies, it's the fears that come up. So
those are all signals to be more aware. And it's
learning to be able to ask, to ask for help,
to ask for support. It's learning to be able to
(29:25):
tune in and know when you need support and help.
And then the third one is learning to become more
alignment is really learning to align with who you are
and align with your truth and being in that alignment,
(29:46):
being in that space, excuse me of alignment is being
able to start taking the actions to choose the relationship,
to choose strategies, whether in your personal life or in
your business, that align with who you really are. And
(30:08):
you want to make sure that you're dropping, you're dropping
the shoulds and the have tos, and you're choosing the
want to or what is your heart calling you or
what is the highest good? How can I serve? How
can I make a difference? And you're coming from that perspective.
And then again, remember this is a journey, it's not
(30:35):
a destination, and you are on the journey. And I
really want to acknowledge you for being on the journey.
So congratulations, and I really want to support all of
you that I have a guided meditation that you can
use to help you to uncover in that awareness. If
(30:57):
there's places where you're not sure am I being authentic
or am I not being authentic? You can use this
meditation to get clarity because it takes you through clearing
connection and then you get to communicate with what we
call the higher self that I talked about in the
(31:17):
beginning of the show. So the guided meditation, you're you're
going to go to Inspired and Empowered Living dot com
Forward slash Meditation N E D I T A t
io N so Inspired and Empowered Living dot com the
(31:41):
name of the show dot com Forward Slash Meditation, and
you can download that meditation that will really support you
in becoming more into your authentic self. So there, let
me just feel into and if there's anything else that
(32:02):
wants to come through about this. So what I really
want you all to know is that again, this is
a journey. It's not a destination. And that even if
you take baby steps on the journey and step by
step using that place of awareness to tapping in and
(32:24):
tuning in to who you are, taking time to be
connected with yourself and then the awareness and then being
able to express yourself in authentic ways and learning to
live more from alignment and being able to be in
that alignment so that you're coming from the place of authenticity.
(32:50):
And I want to thank you for being here and
being on the journey with me. I'm really grateful to you,
and thank you to all of you who write the
questions in and thank you for all who are listening
or viewing live and who are listening or viewing at
(33:11):
a later time. And I want to invite you for
next week for more inspired and living and inspired and
empowered living. And we are live on Thursdays at five
pm Eastern on TALKFORTV dot com, W four WN dot
com and my YouTube channel, and you can also check
(33:34):
out the podcast, and you can check out the podcast
on iHeartRadio, Spotify, Apple and Dora, Amazon and many more.
And I wish you all and inspired and empowered day, night,
and week. Have a great one everybody, Bye for now.
Speaker 1 (34:00):
The stat
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