Jack Tame: The corrector becomes the corrected

The moment the syllables spilled from my mouth, I knew I’d screwed up.    

“And a repeat offender...” I said.  “Verse a detective dog.”   

Verse.   

It was the opening few stanzas of last night’s news, the part of the show where we tease a few of the evening’s top stories. And as the opening credits played, with my microphone fader pulled down, I called out to my producer in frustration with myself.    

“Versus!” I said. “VERSUS.” 

The emails flooded in. I knew they’d be waiting for me. Polite but gently critical messages, kindly informing me that due to myriad inadequacies in the New Zealand education system, I’d used a term more appropriately associated with Shakespeare or Keats than that of the cunning pest control dog starring in the evening bulletin. 

But hey. Did you notice there how I used myriad? I don’t know about you, but it drives me crazy when I hear people talk about a myriad OF something. It shouldn’t because apparently a myriad ‘of’ is perfectly correct. Myriad started its English language life in noun form. And yet anytime someone opts for ‘myriad of’ instead of the adjective usage, the snooty language snob in me can’t help but curl his toes.

It’s the same when people say less instead of fewer. There are not less than thirty days until the new year. There are fewer than thirty days. Duh. And I hate to admit it, but I’m not fussed whether you’re a stranger, a colleague, or my long-suffering wife, I’m that miserable sod who can’t help but wait fewer than a few split seconds before pretentiously correcting your mistake.

The other one that gets my goat (and yes, it gets my goat... it doesn’t get up my goat) is when anyone observes that the proof is in the pudding. The proof is not in the pudding. The proof of the pudding is in the eating. Makes sense when you actually think about it. 

Speaking of mastication, my Dad was recently spun into a state of despair by the repeated insistence of a prominent sportsperson that they were chomping at the bit for an upcoming contest. Chomping at the bit, rather than champing at the bit. I suppose that really would be a remarkable level of excitement. 

I know that language is alive. I know that language morphs and evolves. But for those of us who care to conserve usage principles and don’t mind putting others right from time, there is nothing like erring while reading the news before 700,000 people, for a rude taste of one’s own medicine. How quickly the corrector becomes the corrected. 

Myriad grammar and usage errors might get my goat, but I’ve learnt the hard way there are plenty of other grammar and usage tyrants champing at the bit to correct every error. Who knows if my cautionary tale will have any impact —the proof of the pudding is in the eating— but if you’ve learnt anything, maybe you’ll make fewer errors rather than less, after listening to this verse.  

You know... as opposed to versus. 

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:07):
You're listening to the Saturday Morning with Jack team podcast
from News Talks'd be.

Speaker 2 (00:12):
The moment the syllables spilled from my mouth. I knew
I'd screwed up and a repeat offender, I said, verse
a detective dog. Verse. It was the opening few stanzas
of last night's one News, the part of the show
where we tease a few of the evening's top stories.

(00:35):
And as the opening credits played, with my microphone fader
pulled down, I called out to my producer in frustration
with myself. Verse I said, versus versus. The emails flooded in.
I knew they'd be waiting for me just as soon
as the bulletin finished, polite but gently critical messages, kindly

(00:56):
informing me that due to myriad inadequacies in the New
Zealand education system, I had used a term more appropriately
associated with Shakespeare or Keats than that of the cunning
pest control dog starring in the Evening Bulletin. There is
a difference between verse and verses, But hey, did you

(01:17):
notice there how I used myriad. I don't know about you,
but it drives me crazy when I hear people talk
about a myriad of something and it shouldn't. It really shouldn't,
because apparently a myriad of is actually perfectly correct. Myriad
started its English language life in noun form, and yet

(01:42):
anytime someone opt for myriad of instead of the adjective usage,
the snooty language snob in me can't help but curl
his toes. It's the same. Unfortunately, when people say less
instead of fewer, there are not less than thirty days
until the new year. There are fewer than thirty days.

Speaker 1 (02:04):
Duh.

Speaker 2 (02:05):
And I hate to add, but I'm not fussed whether
you are a stranger, a colleague, or my long suffering wife.
I am that miserable sod who can't help but wait
fewer than a few split seconds before pretentiously correcting your mistake.
The other one that really gets my goat, and yes
it gets my goat, it doesn't get up my goat

(02:28):
is when anyone observes that the proof is in the pudding.
The proof is not in the pudding. The proof of
the pudding is in the eating. Makes sense when you
actually think about it, doesn't it. Speaking of mastication, my
dad was recently spun into a state by the repeated
insistence of a prominent sportsperson that they were chomping at

(02:49):
the bit for an upcoming contest. Chomping at the bit
rather than champing at the bit. I suppose that really
would be a remarkable level of excitement. Look, I know
that language is alive, right, I know that language morphs
and evolves. But for those of us who care to
conserve usage principles and don't mind putting others right from

(03:11):
time to time, there is nothing like erring while reading
the news before seven hundred thousand people for a rude
taste of one's own medicine. How quickly the corrector becomes
the correctid. Myriad grammar and usage errors might get my goat,

(03:31):
but I've learned the hard way. There are plenty of
other grammar and usage tyrants out there positively champing at
the bit to correct every error. Who knows if my
cautionary tale will have any impact. The proof of the
pudding is in the eating. But if you have learned anything,
maybe you will make fewer errors rather than less. After

(03:52):
listening to this verse verse you know, as opposed to verses.

Speaker 1 (03:59):
For more From Saturday Morning with Jack Tame, listen live
to news talks. He'd be from nine am Saturday, or
follow the podcast on iHeartRadio