August 2, 2022 • 13 mins
Dear Steve and Shirley, I’m a 49 year old single woman and I say I’m single because I’ve been in a dead-end relationship for almost 10 years. I was so in love with this man and I felt like he loved me but he stopped telling me after 3 years of being together. Instead of telling me, he’d say that I was the closest thing he had to a wife and everyone knows who his #1 is.............................................
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
All right, before we get to the Strawberry Letter, we
got to remind you ninety eight days until the midterms.
Ninety eight days until the midterms. Today is election day
for primaries in Arizona, Kansas, Washington, Missouri, and Michigan. Please
make sure you register to vote. All you have to
do is go to when we all vote dot org.
That's when we all vote dot org. Okay, that's right.
(00:25):
Let's get out and vote, people, Let's get out and vote.
It is time now for today Strawberry Letter. If you
need advice on relationships, dating, work, sex, parenting, and more,
please submit your Strawberry letter to cefarvfm dot com and
click submit Strawberry Letter. We could be reading your letter
live on the air, just like we're gonna read this
one right here, right now. Okay, never know, it's could
(00:48):
be yours. You never know. Buckle up and hold on tight.
We got it for you. Here it is Strawberry Letter.
Subject I'm not the one and We're not the two.
Dear Stephen Shirley. I'm a fort nine year old single woman,
and I say I'm single because I've been in a
dead end relationship for almost ten years. I was so
in love with this man, and I felt like he
(01:10):
loved me, but he stopped telling me after three years
of being together. Instead of telling me, he'd say that
I was the closest thing he had to a wife,
and everyone knows who his number one is. I was
too needy and gullible back then to realize how stupid
that sounded. There have been a few instances, incidences here
(01:30):
and there, where I'd hear something about my man out
in the streets, and he would always say that other
women are jealous of me because he's all mine. He
has a huge ego and I fed it for years.
And now that I've come to my senses, I want
out of this foolishness. Our house is in my name,
his car is in my name, and he has a
(01:51):
credit card that I let him use. It's been a
cycle of this man telling me whatever I need to
hear so I won't dump him. But I'm ready to
go good. And here's why. I got home from work
Tuesday and he was already home in his bathrobe. He
said that it felt like he had COVID, so I
told him to go to the doctor. He left at
(02:11):
four pm and called later to say he'd been admitted
and would call me later. I did not even get
to ask what hospital he was in, and his phone
must have been off because I couldn't reach him. My
spidey senses kicked in and I called his mother to
see if she'd heard from him. She said he had
just left her house and he looked fine to her.
(02:33):
He came in. He came in the next morning with
gatorade and ibuprofen, and he said it was dehydration. I'm
not the one and we are not the two. It's
time for him to go, and I need advice on
how to break the cycle so he doesn't keep lying
and cheating. How do I get rid of this man?
(02:56):
I'm trying to figure out why is that so hard
for you to get rid of him? It's been pretty
much unhappiness for you for ten years, or at least
seven of the ten. Don't you want to be happy
and have a real relationship with someone who treats you
like a queen? You say you need advice on how
to break the cycle so he doesn't keep lying and cheating,
(03:17):
And how do you get rid of this man? You know,
why is this so hard? I don't think that's what's
happening here. He's not treating you like a queen. He's
not giving you what you need. You mentioned how much
you love the man, But why do you love him
so much? I think it's because he's been there. It's comfortable,
it's convenient for you. It's it's hard a lot of
(03:40):
times to just pack up and start over. I get that,
But a new start is better than staying in this
what you call dead end relationship, isn't it? Comfort and
convenience do have a tendency to make us stay longer
than we should. You're you're still with a man who
lied to you about having COVID so he can get
out of the house and cheat. I mean, that's basically
(04:02):
what you're saying in this letter. Your instincts are telling
you that, so dump him. I mean, it's time for
him to realize the old you is gone and now
he's got to go. You've been with him for way
too long taking this type of behavior. People break up
every day. You guys aren't married. It's not like there's
a divorce where you have to split your assets and stuff.
(04:24):
Tell him you're not happy. It's time for you to
move on. This relationship is going nowhere. In other words,
tell him you're done and it's over. I mean he's
probably gonna beg and plead and lie, because remember you
take care of his house, in his car and everything.
But you gotta stay strong. You just gotta get out
of it. It's not that hard, Steve Man. Lady, you know,
(04:46):
here's a woman who wrote a letter, who actually answered
the letter herself. But she wrote the letter looking for
an answer. All your answers, you wrote them in the
letter letter yourself. Okay, so, sister, let me help you
realize what you just wrote to me in shirt. Okay,
(05:10):
I'm not the one and we're not the two. Here's
the letter. Just Stephen Sherlley, I'm a forty nine year
old single woman that's damn near fifty. And I say
I'm single because I'm in a dead end relationship for
almost ten years. Let's stop right here. If you're writing
a letter at damn near fifty because you think you're
(05:33):
single because you are in a dead end relationship, you
are telling us what the problem is right now. But
you also have the solution in this letter. I was
so in love with this man, and I felt like
he loved me, but he stopped telling me after three
(05:55):
years of being together. So for seven years you ain't
heard nothing. It stopped after year three. This is the
answer to your letter. He stopped loving you after year three.
Instead of telling me, he'd say I was the closest
thing he had to a wife, and everyone knows who
(06:19):
his number one is. Wayman, you ain't. Oh okay, so
he got enough women where he numbering y'all, you don't
see that you're the closest thing he got to a wife,
but he even have no wife, and everybody knows you
the number one. Okay, we'll see come back, all right, Steve.
(06:40):
We'll come back with part two of your response coming
up at twenty three minutes after the hour of the
subject for today's Strawberry Letters, I'm not the one and
We're not the two. We'll get back into it right
after this. You're listening show, all right, Come on, Steve,
let's recap today's Strawberry Letters subject I'm not the one
and We're not the two. All right, here's a woman
(07:02):
who wrote in a letter like I said, who is
telling us exactly what's wrong. So that means she has
identified the problem, and she's also provided us with all
the solutions for herself, but obviously she don't know this
power she has. So he would go forty nine year
old single woman, I say I'm single because I've been
(07:22):
a dead in relationship for ten years. Did you hear yourself?
Your in relationship for ten years? Is going dead in?
I was was past test, so in love with this man.
I felt like he loved me, but he stopped telling
me after three years, So for seven years, you haven't
felt loved. Are you listening to you? He'd say, I
(07:45):
was the closest thing he had to a wife, and
everybody knows who his number one is. So now he
got enough women, so he numbered them all right. I
was too needy and gulable back then to realize how
stupid that's sounded. Back then, when was it at the
first three years you sounded good or and it took
(08:06):
you seven years of realizing what he was saying. I'm
a little confused, sister, but it don't sound like you are.
That has been a few incidents here and there where
I'd hear something about my man out in the streets,
and he would always say that other woman, that other
(08:26):
women are jealous of me because he's all mine. He
has a huge ego, and I fared it for years,
and now that I've come to my senses, I want
out of this foolishness. Okay, here goes the answer. Our
house is in my name, his car is in my name,
(08:46):
and he has a credit card. I led him. Use
those three things right here. Number one, put him out
of your house. Number two, repoll your car, and number
three report the credit card stolen. Have them send you
(09:10):
a new car with a new number. And now his
ass is out of house, home and a little. It's
just that simple. You put all this in the letter.
It's been a cycle of this man telling me whatever
I needed to hear. No, he told you what you
wanted to hear, so I wouldn't dump him. But I'm
(09:33):
ready to go for good. And here's why. Oh oh,
now she ready to go. And here this is why. Okay,
let's look at this. I got home from work two
he was already home in his bathroom. He said he
felt like he had COVID. Oh what a nice guy.
I think I got COVID. I come home, put on
the damn bathrobe and went on you to come home
(09:56):
so I could breathe this information on your ass. You
thought you had COVID, so you come home, put a
bad robe on him, breathe all over the house, and
breathe his information on me? Are you kidding me? So?
I told him to go to the doctor. He couldn't wait.
He left at four pm and called me later said
(10:18):
he'd been admitted and he would call me later. I
did not even ask for the hospital he was in.
And the nurse must have been off because and his
phone must have been off because I couldn't reach him. Now,
watch this, My spidy senses kicked in. Women, Wow, had
he damn census been for ten years? So your spidy
(10:43):
senses kicked in after ten years at all? Your spidy
sensors kicked in when he gave you COVID? H when
you thought what anyway? I called his mother to see
if she'd heard from She said he has left for
her house. He looked fine to her, looked fine to me.
(11:04):
He say sick. Well, well Robert was over here and
he just left the house and he Robert looked good
to me. You say he got COVID, Well he didn't.
Harry Man rob On over here and he was driving.
Let me call Robert and see if he got the
(11:24):
COVID and not because why would he come over here
if he had the COVID. You know, I got a
pre existing condition. That's right, mama. He said he had
just left the house and and and looked fine to me.
He came in the next morning with gatorade and some
(11:46):
abut pope, you're proud of him, and he said it
was dehydra. You know, I'd be proud of him. And
he had not stopped by his mama. Yeah, I wou'd
have been proud of me. He had to stop by
his mama's because this was a Google gatorade and I
(12:07):
bow profit and they told him to just dehij I'm
not the one and we're not the two. What you
mean to say is I'm not number one. I'm somewhere
around number two. Because there's a lot of stuff in
front of you. You ain't even the number one no more.
(12:27):
Because he has spent the night somewhere else. It's time
for Yeah, he was getting some healing, but it wasn't
from a doctor. It's time for him to go. And
I need him vice on how to break the cycle
so he doesn't keep lying and cheating. How do I
get rid of this man. Let's go over this again.
(12:47):
The house is in your name. Put him out your house.
The car he drives is in your name. Repot the card,
and he has a credit card. I let him use.
Report the credit card stolen. That's it. Thank you, Steve.
Post your comments on today's Strawberry Letter at Steve HARVEYFM
on Instagram and Facebook, and check out the Strawberry Letter
podcast on demand. Coming up at forty six minutes after
(13:09):
the hour, it is Junior Sports Talk. Right after this,
you're listening to the Stave Harvey Morning Show
All right, before we get to the Strawberry Letter, we
got to remind you ninety eight days until the midterms.
Ninety eight days until the midterms. Today is election day
for primaries in Arizona, Kansas, Washington, Missouri, and Michigan. Please
make sure you register to vote. All you have to
do is go to when we all vote dot org.
That's when we all vote dot org. Okay, that's right.
(00:25):
Let's get out and vote, people, Let's get out and vote.
It is time now for today Strawberry Letter. If you
need advice on relationships, dating, work, sex, parenting, and more,
please submit your Strawberry letter to cefarvfm dot com and
click submit Strawberry Letter. We could be reading your letter
live on the air, just like we're gonna read this
one right here, right now. Okay, never know, it's could
(00:48):
be yours. You never know. Buckle up and hold on tight.
We got it for you. Here it is Strawberry Letter.
Subject I'm not the one and We're not the two.
Dear Stephen Shirley. I'm a fort nine year old single woman,
and I say I'm single because I've been in a
dead end relationship for almost ten years. I was so
in love with this man, and I felt like he
(01:10):
loved me, but he stopped telling me after three years
of being together. Instead of telling me, he'd say that
I was the closest thing he had to a wife,
and everyone knows who his number one is. I was
too needy and gullible back then to realize how stupid
that sounded. There have been a few instances, incidences here
(01:30):
and there, where I'd hear something about my man out
in the streets, and he would always say that other
women are jealous of me because he's all mine. He
has a huge ego and I fed it for years.
And now that I've come to my senses, I want
out of this foolishness. Our house is in my name,
his car is in my name, and he has a
(01:51):
credit card that I let him use. It's been a
cycle of this man telling me whatever I need to
hear so I won't dump him. But I'm ready to
go good. And here's why. I got home from work
Tuesday and he was already home in his bathrobe. He
said that it felt like he had COVID, so I
told him to go to the doctor. He left at
(02:11):
four pm and called later to say he'd been admitted
and would call me later. I did not even get
to ask what hospital he was in, and his phone
must have been off because I couldn't reach him. My
spidey senses kicked in and I called his mother to
see if she'd heard from him. She said he had
just left her house and he looked fine to her.
(02:33):
He came in. He came in the next morning with
gatorade and ibuprofen, and he said it was dehydration. I'm
not the one and we are not the two. It's
time for him to go, and I need advice on
how to break the cycle so he doesn't keep lying
and cheating. How do I get rid of this man?
(02:56):
I'm trying to figure out why is that so hard
for you to get rid of him? It's been pretty
much unhappiness for you for ten years, or at least
seven of the ten. Don't you want to be happy
and have a real relationship with someone who treats you
like a queen? You say you need advice on how
to break the cycle so he doesn't keep lying and cheating,
(03:17):
And how do you get rid of this man? You know,
why is this so hard? I don't think that's what's
happening here. He's not treating you like a queen. He's
not giving you what you need. You mentioned how much
you love the man, But why do you love him
so much? I think it's because he's been there. It's comfortable,
it's convenient for you. It's it's hard a lot of
(03:40):
times to just pack up and start over. I get that,
But a new start is better than staying in this
what you call dead end relationship, isn't it? Comfort and
convenience do have a tendency to make us stay longer
than we should. You're you're still with a man who
lied to you about having COVID so he can get
out of the house and cheat. I mean, that's basically
(04:02):
what you're saying in this letter. Your instincts are telling
you that, so dump him. I mean, it's time for
him to realize the old you is gone and now
he's got to go. You've been with him for way
too long taking this type of behavior. People break up
every day. You guys aren't married. It's not like there's
a divorce where you have to split your assets and stuff.
(04:24):
Tell him you're not happy. It's time for you to
move on. This relationship is going nowhere. In other words,
tell him you're done and it's over. I mean he's
probably gonna beg and plead and lie, because remember you
take care of his house, in his car and everything.
But you gotta stay strong. You just gotta get out
of it. It's not that hard, Steve Man. Lady, you know,
(04:46):
here's a woman who wrote a letter, who actually answered
the letter herself. But she wrote the letter looking for
an answer. All your answers, you wrote them in the
letter letter yourself. Okay, so, sister, let me help you
realize what you just wrote to me in shirt. Okay,
(05:10):
I'm not the one and we're not the two. Here's
the letter. Just Stephen Sherlley, I'm a forty nine year
old single woman that's damn near fifty. And I say
I'm single because I'm in a dead end relationship for
almost ten years. Let's stop right here. If you're writing
a letter at damn near fifty because you think you're
(05:33):
single because you are in a dead end relationship, you
are telling us what the problem is right now. But
you also have the solution in this letter. I was
so in love with this man, and I felt like
he loved me, but he stopped telling me after three
(05:55):
years of being together. So for seven years you ain't
heard nothing. It stopped after year three. This is the
answer to your letter. He stopped loving you after year three.
Instead of telling me, he'd say I was the closest
thing he had to a wife, and everyone knows who
(06:19):
his number one is. Wayman, you ain't. Oh okay, so
he got enough women where he numbering y'all, you don't
see that you're the closest thing he got to a wife,
but he even have no wife, and everybody knows you
the number one. Okay, we'll see come back, all right, Steve.
(06:40):
We'll come back with part two of your response coming
up at twenty three minutes after the hour of the
subject for today's Strawberry Letters, I'm not the one and
We're not the two. We'll get back into it right
after this. You're listening show, all right, Come on, Steve,
let's recap today's Strawberry Letters subject I'm not the one
and We're not the two. All right, here's a woman
(07:02):
who wrote in a letter like I said, who is
telling us exactly what's wrong. So that means she has
identified the problem, and she's also provided us with all
the solutions for herself, but obviously she don't know this
power she has. So he would go forty nine year
old single woman, I say I'm single because I've been
(07:22):
a dead in relationship for ten years. Did you hear yourself?
Your in relationship for ten years? Is going dead in?
I was was past test, so in love with this man.
I felt like he loved me, but he stopped telling
me after three years, So for seven years, you haven't
felt loved. Are you listening to you? He'd say, I
(07:45):
was the closest thing he had to a wife, and
everybody knows who his number one is. So now he
got enough women, so he numbered them all right. I
was too needy and gulable back then to realize how
stupid that's sounded. Back then, when was it at the
first three years you sounded good or and it took
(08:06):
you seven years of realizing what he was saying. I'm
a little confused, sister, but it don't sound like you are.
That has been a few incidents here and there where
I'd hear something about my man out in the streets,
and he would always say that other woman, that other
(08:26):
women are jealous of me because he's all mine. He
has a huge ego, and I fared it for years,
and now that I've come to my senses, I want
out of this foolishness. Okay, here goes the answer. Our
house is in my name, his car is in my name,
(08:46):
and he has a credit card. I led him. Use
those three things right here. Number one, put him out
of your house. Number two, repoll your car, and number
three report the credit card stolen. Have them send you
(09:10):
a new car with a new number. And now his
ass is out of house, home and a little. It's
just that simple. You put all this in the letter.
It's been a cycle of this man telling me whatever
I needed to hear. No, he told you what you
wanted to hear, so I wouldn't dump him. But I'm
(09:33):
ready to go for good. And here's why. Oh oh,
now she ready to go. And here this is why. Okay,
let's look at this. I got home from work two
he was already home in his bathroom. He said he
felt like he had COVID. Oh what a nice guy.
I think I got COVID. I come home, put on
the damn bathrobe and went on you to come home
(09:56):
so I could breathe this information on your ass. You
thought you had COVID, so you come home, put a
bad robe on him, breathe all over the house, and
breathe his information on me? Are you kidding me? So?
I told him to go to the doctor. He couldn't wait.
He left at four pm and called me later said
(10:18):
he'd been admitted and he would call me later. I
did not even ask for the hospital he was in.
And the nurse must have been off because and his
phone must have been off because I couldn't reach him. Now,
watch this, My spidy senses kicked in. Women, Wow, had
he damn census been for ten years? So your spidy
(10:43):
senses kicked in after ten years at all? Your spidy
sensors kicked in when he gave you COVID? H when
you thought what anyway? I called his mother to see
if she'd heard from She said he has left for
her house. He looked fine to her, looked fine to me.
(11:04):
He say sick. Well, well Robert was over here and
he just left the house and he Robert looked good
to me. You say he got COVID, Well he didn't.
Harry Man rob On over here and he was driving.
Let me call Robert and see if he got the
(11:24):
COVID and not because why would he come over here
if he had the COVID. You know, I got a
pre existing condition. That's right, mama. He said he had
just left the house and and and looked fine to me.
He came in the next morning with gatorade and some
(11:46):
abut pope, you're proud of him, and he said it
was dehydra. You know, I'd be proud of him. And
he had not stopped by his mama. Yeah, I wou'd
have been proud of me. He had to stop by
his mama's because this was a Google gatorade and I
(12:07):
bow profit and they told him to just dehij I'm
not the one and we're not the two. What you
mean to say is I'm not number one. I'm somewhere
around number two. Because there's a lot of stuff in
front of you. You ain't even the number one no more.
(12:27):
Because he has spent the night somewhere else. It's time
for Yeah, he was getting some healing, but it wasn't
from a doctor. It's time for him to go. And
I need him vice on how to break the cycle
so he doesn't keep lying and cheating. How do I
get rid of this man. Let's go over this again.
(12:47):
The house is in your name. Put him out your house.
The car he drives is in your name. Repot the card,
and he has a credit card. I let him use.
Report the credit card stolen. That's it. Thank you, Steve.
Post your comments on today's Strawberry Letter at Steve HARVEYFM
on Instagram and Facebook, and check out the Strawberry Letter
podcast on demand. Coming up at forty six minutes after
(13:09):
the hour, it is Junior Sports Talk. Right after this,
you're listening to the Stave Harvey Morning Show
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